How can I help my girlfriend feel less "broken" and regain confidence after a previously emotionally abusive relationship?
Q. A little over 5 months ago I met my "dream girl", and our relationship has been going really well so far. I'm 24 and she is 22. She doesn't seem to have a whole lot of confidence in herself though. I asked her about it in the nicest way possible and ...
A. 15 September 2013: Excellent. Be patient. Continue to encourage support n compliment. Dont kiss her ass but compliment n if she achieves something buy her a small gift. Continue to be a consistent gentleman!!... (read in full...)
Was I wrong in how I asked the question about her 'number'? I've had 6 sexual partners, she's had 65.
Q. I am not your typical guy but to date in my life i have had a total of six female sexual partners. All were long term relationships and each relationship was rewarding and satisfying. I started these when i was sixteen years old and continued ...
A. 15 September 2013: Yea she feels judged coz she herself sees it as bad. She prob told u the number coz chances are she regrets. Thats what I gather. Yes don't beg but do apologize in fact id bust her balls a little n tell her to relax.... (read in full...)
I'm upset that he's started smoking weed again, how do I approach this?
Q. Hello all, My boyfriend used to be a fairly heavy drug user before I met him (according to him) but has not been using for almost 2 years now. He just told me that he's been smoking weed occasionally with friends, and this really upsets me. Beca...
A. 11 September 2013: Offer a compromise. Say ill get u a nice watch or something u both agree on thats nice n for long term use so he sticks to the agreement. Get him something nice in exchange for him quitting. I got my gf an ankle bracelet custom made to a design that ... (read in full...)
My EX from 2 weeks ago is already ENGAGED to her PREVIOUS EX!!! Help!!!
Q. So I figured I would get an outsiders, unbiased perspective on this situation. My ex and I broke up about a month and a half ago. We broke it off very well; maturely, trying to stay friends, and kept it very civil. We were dating for about a year...
A. 8 September 2013: True ring or not its a sign she wants u away. Sorry man.... (read in full...)
Why would you women wear a ring on your wedding ring finger if you aren't married?
Q. Totally confused over here right about now......... I like a woman who I thought was married because she wore what looked like a wedding ring on her wedding ring finger. At first I thought it wasn't, it looked too plain not a band type ring then I...
A. 8 September 2013: Dude thats common many single women wear rings to keep men from approaching them. Its their passive way of saying eff off. In ur case it seems like shes letting her guard down a little if shes telling u she isnt actually married.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend loves me but is constantly on Facebook and has messages from other women on his phone.
Q. So my Boyfriend of 6 months that loves me to death and worships the ground I walk on is constantly on FacebooK. I actually Deactivated my account because of him. I just got tired of constantly seeing him on there... So tonight when he was checking...
A. 8 September 2013: Damn. His words about love are bs. This guy loves attention shamefully not yours. Yea id say theres a fair chance hes hiding something.... (read in full...)
How much will it cost per month to have a girlfriend? Outings,gas, gifts, clothes? I need to factor the cost into my budget
Q. How much does a girlfriend cost per month? Do not bother replying if you say "priceless" or "too much" as those sayings are far too old and a scapegoat. Women, don't bother replying with bs that you are free, and don't tell me that you always pay ...
A. 1 September 2013: Lol man this is hilarious. It doesnt sound like u have the proper mindset to start a relationship. Theres alot I can tell by this post. I wouldnt bother with a girl right now.... (read in full...)
Creepy Guy: Ignore or Confront?
Q. Almost all of my friends are males. Most of them also work in my department at work. Usually this has never, ever been a problem. However one of my male friends just... can't take a hint. I'm not interested! A few months back he told me that he ...
A. 29 August 2013: Since this is workplace id file a harassment complaint. Men like him need a strong reaction in order for him to understand. Youre being too nice n patient which arent bad necessarily this guy just needs to be dealt with differently.... (read in full...)
I get physically sick when my boyfriend looks at other women in front me or talks how beautiful women are. What should I do?
Q. I am starting to wonder if I need to seek professional help as I am concerned about my mental and physical state. My reaction to my boyfriends looking at women in front of me and his fixation with a female co-worker is starting to affect my mental...
A. 28 August 2013: Sageoldguy hits it well. Wow. Im appalled.... (read in full...)
I need to give my LDR g/f space but how much is right?
Q. Hi All Ive been in my LDR for way too long now (i should have moved to be with her ages ago). And if im honest about things i did take her for granted and was unreliable about a few things, i always made the most of time together though (weekends...
A. 28 August 2013: Yes back off n wait respect her boundary. Learn from me I just screwed up with that :/
Wait a week max then send a casual hi how are u my guess is shes worried about further investing into the reltshp because of whatever reason so shes pulling back... (read in full...)
She seems more friendly to me than to others -- could she be interested?
Q. I sometimes shop at this supermarket and checkout by this girl, who is always very nice to me. She is always very interested in hearing about me and tells me about herself. When I first checked out by her, I asked her where she is from, which she ...
A. 19 August 2013: Ask her out!! Golden chance!... (read in full...)
We are soulmates but now he's ignoring me.
Q. I've been in a whirlwind relationship that I would consider my soulmate. He is recently divorced, a messy divorce, and has kids. I'm longtime divorced with no children. It was love at first sight for both of us and he asked me to marry him ...
A. 19 August 2013: Yes stress caused it. Apologize n let him cool down. Dont attempt to contact while hes away unless he does.... (read in full...)
Are boobs that important to guys?
Q. Hello! Ok so I am a 17 year old girl, and very small and thin... If any of you know who Ariana Grande is (singer/actress) I basically have the exact body type as her. Short, petite, and thin. Unfortunately that also means I really don't have boobs ...
A. 19 August 2013: First that kid is an idiot. Ignore him. As u get older personality is more important and far more wiser to investing in developing vs a pair.... (read in full...)
Could my daughter's cheating cause a family feud to develop?
Q. Thank you for your help with my question at http://www.dearcupid.org/question/my-daughter-was-cheating-on-her-fiance-with.html - I appreciate it. However, the thing I was most worried about was a family feud developing between the two families - e...
A. 19 August 2013: Yes of course it could trigger bad relations. She needs to come clean apologize n find a way to move forward.... (read in full...)
He can't hold off masturbating for one day during the week but can go two days without doing anything sexual with me.
Q. I have a question to all the guys who have been in a relationship for at least a year. My boyfriend and I have been together for 1 1/2. He's 33, I am 28. We do not live together yet but are working on it. Every weekend Friday to Monday morning we ...
A. 18 August 2013: If I have strong feelings for a woman I hold off. If not I dont. Ive learned this about myself. Imo hes used to a certain stimulation that isnt u. He prefers something else and to be honest thats not cool. You sound sexy n fun dont let this hurt ur ... (read in full...)
My daughter was cheating on her fiance with her best friend's father. How do I contain this situation?
Q. My 27 yr old daughter has recently admitted to me she's been cheating on her fiance with her best friend's dad, and she's thinking about ditching her fiance and marrying her best friend's dad. She admitted she was discreet about the affair. I am...
A. 17 August 2013: You did the right thing by telling her fiance. What a guy.
Next her selfishness has to have a price. She cant repair everything n by that I mean her best friends family. She may have to cut ties with them for at least awhile if not forever. It woul... (read in full...)
If a guy misses you, does that mean he has feelings for you?
Q. Hello everyone. I just have a question. I hope to hear from some men as well. When a man tells you he will miss you (he is going away on a trip for a week)..... is this a good sign that he has feelings for you/has an emotional connection ...
A. 14 August 2013: I kno when I say that and believe me its rare yes it means I feel at least an emotional connection.... (read in full...)
I am a very quiet and boring guy, will girls like me?
Q. I am a 23 year old guy and never had a girlfriend before. Its not that I don't like women/girls, its because I don't know how to get one due to the fact that I always keep my mouth shut, but I can't help it because its my personality. It is kind of ...
A. 14 August 2013: As long as u vibe out confidence women wont care!... (read in full...)
Your first love: Do you ever really get over them?
Q. Do you ever truly get over your first love? It has been almost four years and I have been in a relationship for a while, but I still catch my self remininscing of the past. We were together for 2 years. ...
A. 13 August 2013: I whack it to the thought of her once in a while but not coz I miss her but because she had a hot body lol time is a good healer!... (read in full...)
My 14 year old daughter gets attention from older guys
Q. Hi, I have a 14 year old daughter and if you looked at her (the way she dresses her makeup and how she acts) you would think she's at least 16. This doesn't worry me, she's very mature and beautiful and most people can't believe she's just 14. She's ...
A. 13 August 2013: A lot of older men may be looking if she has a nice chest. It makes her look older. If thats the case have her dress more conservatively. ... (read in full...)
My step daughter texts her mom's b/f frequently and it makes me uncomfortable
Q. My stepdaughter Isabel who is 17 has been texting her mom's boyfriend a lot... I ask her what the heck they talk about - he says that he teases her a lot. They text pretty much every day, sometimes pretty late at night. I asked her if he's ever ...
A. 12 August 2013: Get the father involved. That is not cool.... (read in full...)
He's been seeing a male prostitute for friendship?
Q. I'm 36, and my husband's 40, we have a 15-year-old daughter. He admitted last night that he'd been going to a male prostitutes to "talk" and have a few beers, and even gave me his mobile number! My husband also said no sex was involved and tha...
A. 10 August 2013: Yes definitely odd behavior. My guess is he is possibly exploring his sexuality and is withholding from you for whatever reason. He is either building it up or he has already tried.... (read in full...)
Why would someone cancel a first date? Male perspective.?
Q. I had met this person twice. The first time we met I was sort of almost judged too soon and we didn't end up speaking that much. The second time we met was by total coincidence at an event. We got to chatting, by that time I had gotten over what had ...
A. 9 August 2013: Yea ask him. Many reasons and if he gives a vague response its possible its a reason u wont like.... (read in full...)
My GF seem to want her mom-daughter see us have sex!. Why would this be?
Q. My girlfriend seems to be setting things up so that her daughter or her mother see us making love. Is this a more common desire for women than I realized? My girlfriend and I are sort of engaged to be engaged. she surrently lives with her mom and...
A. 9 August 2013: No way definitely not normal.... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is making a big issue about the amount of time I spend at the gym
Q. My question is fairly straight forward. Is my gym time too much and can it hinder the relationship I am in? I have been in a relationship for one year with a great girlfriend. We do lots of things together on a weekly basis and really enjoy eac...
A. 9 August 2013: Compromise if u can. She wants time with u n u want the gym maybe spend extra time at the gym one nite so u can b with her another nite?... (read in full...)
Why did he let me go if I was so good for him?
Q. I posted a few days ago in regards to my boyfriend not sure if he saw me in his future. I'm 23, and he is as well. He told me he wasn't sure he saw me completely and he was completely confused. The day before yesterday, he came over to talk. ...
A. 8 August 2013: He feels guilty about something he did n wont say so he just ends it?
He has issues he needs to work out before committing?
Ask him for a reason.... (read in full...)
I really want to help women gain some body confidence but I'm not sure how I can make a difference
Q. I'm really interested in helping women with body issues, but I don't know where to start. We've all heard of the negative messages that are out there telling women that small breasted women are automatically less attractive than large breasted ...
A. 7 August 2013: Interesting post. Im actually a guy who adapted to what society in general sees acceptable physically. I used to be big n flabby now im lean and big. Quite honestly being pissed off and letting that drive me to achieve a good body women desire has ... (read in full...)
A female in denial of her feelings. Anyone dealt with that?
Q. Im curious. Has anyone ever dealt with a female who was in denial of her feelings? And if so, what did it take for her to get over it and come around?...
A. 7 August 2013: Ive given a female counselor vivid details of our dates and transcripts of our chats. She says 'theres a great deal of denial on her part' I kno im not telling all the story. Its a mess. But I do appreciate the answers. I am backing off again.... (read in full...)
Cheated on my boyfriend last night and feel so guilty! Should I tell him?
Q. I went out last night and got really drunk. A guy grabbed me and started kissing me and feeling me up and without thinking I started kissing him back. Then he said he would help to get me home safely but he got out the taxi too and we ended up ...
A. 7 August 2013: Yes tell him.... (read in full...)
A female in denial of her feelings. Anyone dealt with that?
Q. Im curious. Has anyone ever dealt with a female who was in denial of her feelings? And if so, what did it take for her to get over it and come around?...
A. 7 August 2013: More details
She started reciprocating sex(opening up) and giving ie I made dinner she did dishes
We clicked in nearly every way. Great chemistry.
She said I was a great person n had great heart n strong in mind and soul
Also said I was perfe... (read in full...)
Should I contact this girl or continue no contact?
Q. I need advice on whether or not I should contact this girl who I really like but who I closed off all contact after admitting she doesn't want to go further with me after our first date. I met her over a month ago on a dating site and I quickly es...
A. 7 August 2013: Dude ur post sings to me. Im dealing with something similar right now. Yes backoff. I pursued n it pushed her further away. Play it cool. Agree to the friends crap then send her casual hi how r you every few days. Dont say I misd you or anything as ... (read in full...)
A female in denial of her feelings. Anyone dealt with that?
Q. Im curious. Has anyone ever dealt with a female who was in denial of her feelings? And if so, what did it take for her to get over it and come around?...
A. 7 August 2013: Theres too many details. Its a mess.but im very convinced as well as others that she is in denial.... (read in full...)
What do you do when you have a bad feeling about someone your child is dating?
Q. What do you do when you have a bad feeling about someone your child is dating? My daughter and I are very close and I don't want to lose that. She has been dating this guy for about six months and I can sense that he doesn't like me for some ...
A. 5 August 2013: I hated my exes mom coz she judged me for being exposed to Islam. I was 18 n a man. I sat her down n made peace. Id ask ur daughter whats up with him then reassure her ur not angry n tell her u feel hes a good guy but u too also want things to be ... (read in full...)
What are the chances of me finding a man who has never had a one night stand or casual sex?
Q. What are the chances of me finding a man who has never had a one night stand or casual sex? No offence to anyone here but I find that kind of behaviour revolting and it makes me see them as a lesser. I'm 26 now and this worries me. I was appalled ...
A. 5 August 2013: Lol judge me all you want. It was either what I did or continue to allow that beautiful western world continue to ridicule me. Ive had meaningless sex but ive proven im also committed... But in your eyes maybe committed to a mental health institute.... (read in full...)
I need to get over my insecurities.
Q. Im not sure where to start. I only had one serious girlfriend before my wife. Sure we had sex, but I was only 19, lived with my parents and she lived with hers. Our sexual activities were mostly in the backseat of my truck, with a few nights in a ...
A. 4 August 2013: Yea man relax. Its not a bad thing shes experienced. She knows how to please and now she only does that for you. ... (read in full...)
The ex-factor: should I feel stupid for breaking up with him?
Q. Hi. Im here because I broke up with my bf of 2 years a week ago.. I was quite successful I had an apt a job finishing school..and since he had always said he wanted to move in together I was always bringing it up.. He never did..he would always just ...
A. 2 August 2013: Ahh u never got proper closure. Wait a few more days n see how u feel about the message u sent. That might have been all u needed to do.... (read in full...)
Threesomes/ group sex after an adulterous like history, Good idea?
Q. in the past me and my gf broke up for two weeks and got back together. where she was with other men while we were not together. i was not with anyone, we came back and tried a mutually exclusive friends with benefits thing. and that's when i caved ...
A. 2 August 2013: If you question it dont do it. Play it safe.... (read in full...)
Why is this woman at work so nasty to me?
Q. Why are the women I work with so nasty? Urgh? I recently got a new job and this woman who I work with she's been there for a while. She's never liked me or spoken to me and when I ask her a question she makes a very rude face (as if to...
A. 2 August 2013: Are u very attractive? Big breasts? Very confident maybe? Perhaps shes jealous of you in some way. I can nearly guarantee its personal.... (read in full...)
Girls, how long do you want your guys to last in bed?
Q. How long do you want your guys to last in bed, girls? How long have your guys lasted? What's the record? Tell us about it. How long is too long and how short is too short during sex??? ...
A. 2 August 2013: Are u serious? Dont worry about this.... (read in full...)
Pushing me away, pushing me back..what is up with her?
Q. This is my story, im a 36M with no kids and she is a 37F with 2 kids. We've meet 1 and half year ago and immediately *clicked*. We've spent hours daily at the phone speaking of everything and nothing. Lack of sleep or 3 to 4 hours sleep tops becam...
A. 2 August 2013: This is very toxic n dramatic. She is def playing the male role. N if she sleeps with another guy she doesnt respect you. Same with the back n forth behavior. I think she lacks a serious amount of self esteem a basic thing any woman should have. I ... (read in full...)
How do I get over caring what others think and gain some self confidence?
Q. hi how i have very low confidence, although it has improved and it some times really gets me down, or i cant reach my abilitys with it and i think it hampers my life, for example going clubbing i dont ever look forward to it i always dread it, i ...
A. 2 August 2013: Hey man. Listen in my experience aboUt 90 percent of my self confidence comes from appearance. Why? Becoz that is what I found I needed the most to look good. That was because its what people gave the most shit about in my eyes. Be it rejection from ... (read in full...)
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