His past is littered with ex girlfriends and I'm scared!
Q. I was hoping someone might lend some insight to this -- I've been someone who has been rather picky about relationships and most have been all very serious. I will go out on first dates but if I don't see a potential first dates turn into last ...
A. 29 September 2009: This one strikes deep to personal insecurity and trust issues.
The thing that you're looking at is that your boyfriend is a "player", that sort of life-long bachelor who is happier not getting too emotional, and too committed to make a lifetime... (read in full...)
He never says he misses me or that he loves me. Why?
Q. Cupid, I really need your help! I feel so silly writing on here, but I figure it's the easiest way. If I ask my friends what they think, I know how they'll respond and it's safer to get an unbiast opinion... Anyways..I've been going out with t...
A. 29 September 2009: This one's tough because you seem to love him very much. And unfortunately he's just not ready to man up to either telling you he's into you or not.
It could very well be that he likes you a lot. Maybe even loves you a tinge, or maybe a bit more... (read in full...)
Why won't he be honest about watching porn, and share it with me?
Q. Okay I'll try to make a long story short. I'm in my early 20's bf is in his mid 40's He "has" ed BUT when we first meet he COULDN'T keep his hands off of me. Now 3 years later he watches porn. Unlike many women I don't mind it, I watch it too BUT...
A. 29 September 2009: If you can't trust him, and you're unhappy. It seems you're fast falling out of love with him.
If he has an addiction to porn, then he's going to be more attracted sexually to that than you.
Frankly, it seems he has a live woman on his han... (read in full...)
Who was a virgin before our honeymoon, my wife or me?
Q. I was a virgin up until my honeymoon last week. I thought my wife was also a virgin but came to find out otherwise after she and I split a bottle of champagne in the hot tub of our resort. She insisted that no guy could abstain from sex and was ...
A. 29 September 2009: I'd have to say neither one of you is a pure virgin. But then again, what difference does it make?
The two of you obviously have a lot more ahead of you than some burning question about what constituted coital sex, or just sexual experien... (read in full...)
How do I make him understand I'm not a machine?
Q. I am almost thirty yrs old, I am married to a man who is four years younger than me and has a sex drive of a sixteen yr old. We have 3 children together, all between the ages of 6 to 1 yr old. I work full time as well as have the children in various ...
A. 29 September 2009: Timing is everything. With 3 kids you're both stretched to the limit.
Perhaps finding someone to help take care of the kids so that you aren't as tired, will help keep the 2 - 3 times a week thing going. But it seems to me that you could find the... (read in full...)
14 years down the drain because she's confused?
Q. Hello. I've been with my partner for 14 years and it has been fantastic. We both met after having broken hearts and have become each others soul mate, best friend, etc. We always say that we were brought together by fate. We have rarely argued an...
A. 29 September 2009: This is indeed a sad situation for you. I know what it's like to dedicate your heart and devote yourself to someone you love so dearly, and find out that she has doubts.
Thankfully, though, you've shared honesty as well as 14 years of life tog... (read in full...)
It bothers me that my g/f slept with someone she didn't even know
Q. My girlfriend slept with a lead singer from a band. It bothers me everyday that I know this. She said she did it because at the time she was mad at her old boyfriend. It just makes me so sad that she would lower herself like this to someone...
A. 29 September 2009: You find your significant others as someone else left them. Just like she found you the way you were when she met you.
Simply put, it seems that she did something that she's probably not going to do again. Unless of course, she didn't care abo... (read in full...)
Intimidated in the bedroom
Q. so i have been with my girlfried for about four months but we really never did anything. we had sex about two weeks ago or at least attempted to. some one came home and we were forced to stop before it really began. with that being said she never ...
A. 29 September 2009: Size shouldn't be an issue. It all depends on what she's looking for, for excitement and pleasure.
With anything else, if the two of you think of each other's needs first, then consider your own needs, there's a way to work around everythi... (read in full...)
Please I need advice on finding love
Q. Hi everyone, thanks for reading at least. I'm 23 and have never had any kind of close relationship with anyone. It never works when I feel attracted to someone, maybe because I show myself really enthusiastic about what may be going on and become ...
A. 29 September 2009: You should try and meet people first that happen to be interested in the same things you're interested in.
But more importantly, if you want to attract someone as a boyfriend rather than as a friend, you're going to have to seek to develop ... (read in full...)
Are my resentful thoughts called for and how long should I allow myself to recover?
Q. My partner left me after 18 years together. Three weeks later I found out that she was with someone else. She wasnt upset in anyway and ended it with a twn minute coversation in a supermarket coffee shop with her friend sat next to her. It really ...
A. 28 September 2009: This is really sad. I mean terribly sad. 18 years and it ends with her and her friend staring you down. And you find out that she's been with someone else to boot.
Its actually downright cruel. I guess she was dishonest about the other lover.
... (read in full...)
I love my wife but I think divorce is the best answer
Q. I Really want a divorce, my wife doesnt. im still hurt and in love but i need to move -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- First of all i want to say thank you for reading this and im begging you ...
A. 27 September 2009: If you can't stand the lies, and you can't stand the emotional infidelity; then its time to get out. But if the lies and infidelity stop, then its possible to save the marriage.
Let me say this much. When someone is dead-set on remaining a victim... (read in full...)
B/f inconsiderate and puts all the blame on me!
Q. Hey everyone, this is my first time writing here and I'd really appreciate some honest answers. Thanks My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 2 years and I love everything about him, I honestly do! But whenever we have a day planned and ...
A. 27 September 2009: There is a level of maturity that some men never seem to achieve, and likewise there is always a point where some women can never admit they made a mistake.
The two of you need to be good to each other. When plans fall through, he needs to help ... (read in full...)
To tell him how I feel? Or not?
Q. I have met a wonderful man through internet dating... we chat for 2/3 hours on the phone every day... how refreshing to talk, rather than text and msn! After 2 weeks he started to get a bit 'fresh' although he said he was looking for friends. I ...
A. 27 September 2009: From this perspective treading cautiously is very important here. He may have gotten "fresh" in order to test your boundaries with him.
A word of advice. If you truly are interested in developing a close, loving and physical relationship with him... (read in full...)
I know most of his friends, why don't I know her?
Q. Recently married but been with my husband for 10 years. We of course have been through our ups and downs, and even separation in our relationship after I found out he had a baby outside of me. After 2 years of being separated we had a baby and got ...
A. 27 September 2009: Its hard to gauge what's going on here. As a male, I have a lot of female friends. I like them as friends, I love them as friends. I might even adore them as friends. Long conversations are just that. Friends talk and chat.
There is however ... (read in full...)
Help me win back the man I adore!
Q. For almost 2 years I had a wonderful relationship with a beautiful man. Even when he became an Air Force Officer and we had to do the long distance thing for over a year we remained very close and would visit each other frequently. We both have ...
A. 27 September 2009: Specifics:
1. "But what I want to know is how long should I withhold contact for?"
About 30 days unless he calls you first.
2. "I was thinking about calling him right before he comes home for Christmas and making plans since he said that... (read in full...)
Husband's head games...
Q. please help My husband of 5 years keeps playing head games with me, when he Is not feeling happy for various reasons he starts being weird with me.. He will act like he is having an affair, he has told me he was going out one night and I got a fr...
A. 27 September 2009: I can understand the disappearing act. I've heard of some guys that rent studio apartments and just disappear to them to watch TV and chill away from the family one day a week (call it the equivalent of poker night). Some others that hang out in ... (read in full...)
7 years and now this...
Q. The major problem i have in my relationship is TRUST and DEPENDABILITY. 2 major problems in my book. I've been with my love for 7 years and I love him. We have gone through some s*#t and we are still together. We have never cheated on one another, ...
A. 27 September 2009: You two have to get on the same page together. Work out schedules, and if you have to call him and wake him up beforehand so he's ready to come pick you up.
The disjointed schedules should still leave some time together during the week and at n... (read in full...)
Is my BF ashamed of me? He won't hold my hand in public or tell his friends we're dating.
Q. My bf won't hold my hand in public! We have been together for two months and last night we went out to the store and I went to grab his hand and he 'acted' like he needed to grab something and let go of my hand. We held hands for less than 30 ...
A. 27 September 2009: You've got a guy on your hands that has no respect for women. Basically, he's picked this up from his own family.
Likely his father disrespected his mom, and so he learned to be disrespectful to all women, not just you.
His issues are prett... (read in full...)
I feel so guilty for not being able to try again with him...
Q. I am in a miserable situation. I have been married for 10 years and have a 9 year old child. For various reasons, I have grown to resent my husband, he has barely shown me attention sexually for years, hasn't bothered to play much with our son, has ...
A. 26 September 2009: There's a great deal of emotional abandonment going on here. First on his part and now on yours.
I think in a situation like this, if you can't muster the emotional energy to try and reconnect with your husband emotionally, staying together... (read in full...)
So confused, where do I stand with him?
Q. Dear Cupid, I met this guy three weeks ago. We hit it off wonderfully. We went to the movies and had a great dinner. I spent the night cuddling at his house. We then spent the entire weekend together and even raided the swings at the park at midni...
A. 26 September 2009: Why is facebook the be all, end all of relationships?
Okay well this is very simple. You are the victim of New Relationship Energy or Ecstasy or whatever you want to call it.
Basically when you enter into a new relationship with someone, th... (read in full...)
In love with a married woman and don't know what to do
Q. This is a bit of a long story. We first met in our teens. I had the hots for her in a major way... and she felt the same way for me. The problem, neither of us was brave enough to tell the other how we truly felt inside. We spent many of ou...
A. 26 September 2009: Its very simple. If you and the girl of your dreams are so serious about this that in fact, without any doubts remaining, you can't live without each other, then I would say you should try and find a way to be together.
But, the problem here is ... (read in full...)
Am a lover? Or his mother?
Q. I am sittin here angry....why becoz I have a Man (boy) in my house that thinks he is my boyfriend. However, we have as often a nun and a monk....and he does not work, I cook, I clean, I do it all...as he sits and watches, doing his thing....we use ...
A. 26 September 2009: This is not a very good thing here. It seems he's just trash. You need to kick him out and get your life back.
You're not his mother either. What he's doing is using you. Plain and simple.... (read in full...)
I'm married want to know if its ok to indulge in sex with someone else?
Q. i am a married for last 3 years, last year i met a guy who is single. intially it was a good friendship. he is 3 years younger to me. we used to talk a lot. gradually he started expressing his feeling and talking all about himself. one day i saw his ...
A. 26 September 2009: Most of the people answering this question will tell you that what you're doing is plain, flat out wrong.
What you've done is engage in an emotional relationship with another person, and then indulged sex with him.
If this is what you want to... (read in full...)
I get really jealous and insecure when I see my girl talkig to other guys
Q. Hi Aunts and Uncles, I need some advice on beating jealousy and insecurities. I'm seeing a very attractive, very outgoing girl which is the complete opposite to me (I'm very ugly and very shy and no I don't need any sympathy I'm happy being that...
A. 26 September 2009: Spend more time focusing on your own insecurities instead of focusing on her talking to other guys.
A lot of women are just sweet and friendly and outgoing. Its one of the reasons why you love her.
If you trust her, then everything's goi... (read in full...)
I want revenge..how do I make this guy look stupid?
Q. Hi im gonna put it simply, i want revenge on an ex boyfriend Now i know people will say that just getting over him will be enough and that i should move on and make him realise what he's missing. And no offense but ive tried that Im far t...
A. 26 September 2009: There's no reason to waste anymore time on this guy.
He's not worth the time of day. If anything, any time and effort you put into trying to "teach him a lesson" is a waste of your life. He's too shallow and inconsiderate so it won't matter t... (read in full...)
She wants to be with me...minus the sex! Any advice?
Q. Hey, Really confused here. Basically, me and my girlfriend broke up 2 months ago due to 2 things really. She completetly lost interest in sex/couply thing. Before you say im shallow blah blah blah im not. Secondly we were constantly fig...
A. 26 September 2009: One of the problems I see here is a total lack of interest in intimacy. If she's not being affectionate with you, its pretty clear that her only interest in you now is that of some sort of a friend. That isn't cutting it for you, is it?
Felli... (read in full...)
Jealous of a vibrator. Will she get used to the thicker girth?
Q. This may sound ridiculous but I really cant help feeling like this. When I met my girlfriend she had never had an orgasm with any partner and she believed she couldnt have one. she also said that her previous partner didnt even know or probably ...
A. 26 September 2009: I would have to say instead of worrying about the actual act of penetration on your part, you should be working on kissing her all over, wrapping your body around her and getting her all excited while she's using the vibe on herself, and when the ... (read in full...)
Why do people come into our lives to make things difficult?
Q. Why do people come into our lives to make things difficult? Is there any way to remove oneself from society so much so that nothing or no one can interfere in our affairs? I feel like people in general hate seeing other people happy, and try t...
A. 26 September 2009: If guys are hitting on your girlfriend while you're with her, that's actually pretty rude. More to the point, she ought to be looking at them and saying, "Hey, I'm with someone."
I think you need a bit more self-confidence here.
As for 3rd pa... (read in full...)
Do I just walk up to a girl and introduce myself? Maybe I'll miss that chance if I don't!
Q. I keep seeing really pretty girls walking down the streets of New York City. Often we make eye contact and sometimes they smile at me. Is there any point to stop and introduce myself and talk to them or are women not receptive to meeting ...
A. 26 September 2009: Well it all depends on how smoothly you do this. But I suppose in the Big Apple, if you're nice and say "Good morning" or smile and ask if a girl is lost, or maybe ask and claim you're lost; well its an ice-breaker.
You might score a phone nu... (read in full...)
I can't stand that my husband is still the same after 11 years of marriage
Q. Hello, I am 29 years old and have been married for 11 years today. I have two boys 7 and 2. Today is my anniversary and I am miserable! Instead of celebrating I feel sad, like if I'm serving a life sentence. I can't stand my husband. I married ...
A. 26 September 2009: I am so sorry for what you're going through. You are really hurting over this. So maybe something's got to be looked at.
It would've been nice to say happy anniversary to you, but it seems that's not something you're interested in reading about.
... (read in full...)
10 seconds and erection is gone..why?
Q. What could be the problem here? When we have intercourse,my husband usually gets an erection, but around 10 sec inside he is losing in totally. He has night erection, so the plumbing works.... What do you think could be the reason to this?...
A. 25 September 2009: This could be a problem with maintaining arousal. Have you tried doing new and different things besides penetrative sex?
It could also be some other issue. Just having night erections doesn't mean that they will stay that way under pressure... (read in full...)
Cheating with a co-worker/friend of my husband!
Q. I have been married for 16 years and have two children. My husband has been unresponsive and ignoring me for probably 5 of those years. I have considered leaving him many times but haven't for the sake of the children. We have now unofficially ...
A. 25 September 2009: This is a very difficult thing you're going through.
The best advice here is to physically separate from your husband, and either he moves out or you do.
If you can't reconcile, then get a divorce. This will make it easier to build a new rela... (read in full...)
I treated him so badly that he went to another girl!
Q. what do i do when ive treated the one i love so badly he turned to another girl and doesnt know if he even wants me back now!!! ive been cold and distant and he has tried so hard to love me and now i know what ive lost please help me!!...
A. 25 September 2009: I am so sorry for your loss here. The problem is that when you are in a relationship, if you don't pay attention to the man you love (or the woman you love), and you take them for granted or worse, ignore them; then they take that as a sign that you ... (read in full...)
I'm having a second affair after I promised I would never leave him again, do I stay with him or follow my heart and be with the man I love?
Q. This could be a long post but I have to lay it all out. I am a married woman and have been with my husband for 13 years. He was my first serious relationship (I met him when I was 20). About 6 years ago I had an affair and told him I was leavin...
A. 25 September 2009: Though many people responding to your question might judge you harshly (after all who wants a cheater?), I have to say that you have put in a great deal of effort for a man who you tried to help, namely your husband.
I do agree with what K c100 h... (read in full...)
We are both married but I can't move on from the ex after 8 years
Q. He is my soulmate and i love him so much. i dont see myself loving someonelse,i hev tried but failed because i think of him all the time and he tells me he misse me too.Right i started dating this guy wen i was 18years old we loved each other so ...
A. 25 September 2009: You can be in love with several people at the same time.
Your ex is someone that you imagine in your mind, as the person you knew. But he's changed and so have you.
You have the good fortune of having a man who loves you so much; and if you... (read in full...)
I'm the one showing all the love...
Q. hey. so i hope anyone can help me. I dont know if my boyfriend loves me. He says he does. But i feel like im the one showing all the love. See i had to leave him for three months and i promised him i would call him. I feel bad cause im always the ...
A. 25 September 2009: One of the most difficult things in life, and would seem intuitive things in life is learning how to love another person.
In your age bracket, so many things are going on; so many distractions, that you often don't see each other, even when you... (read in full...)
He's never given me any reason to doubt him but I cant get over his past!
Q. Hi, my partner of five years is 62 and I am 53 hence we have a lot of life experiences between us. When we first got together he told me a lot about his past and if I'm honest I was shocked as it consisted of 4 unplanned pregnancies, 3 abortions etc ...
A. 25 September 2009: Life does things to us. We make a lot of mistakes. You can't live to age 62 without stepping on a lot of toes.
The financial / commitment issues can be fixed with a pre-nup agreement, which if properly done is bullet-proofed. After the wedding,... (read in full...)
Guys: Do you still think of your ex when in relationship with someone else?
Q. Just a qucik question to the guys who come here! Do you still think about your ex gf's or ex wives whilst you are in a relationship? If so how, when and why? Thanks :)...
A. 25 September 2009: I think of avoiding the mistakes that were made, trying to be a better man; remembering that there can be good times; forgiveness. ... (read in full...)
Help me win back the man I adore!
Q. For almost 2 years I had a wonderful relationship with a beautiful man. Even when he became an Air Force Officer and we had to do the long distance thing for over a year we remained very close and would visit each other frequently. We both have ...
A. 25 September 2009: This is so very, very sad. I think he has a lot of doubts.
Let's see if this can break down a little easier.
First of all, he's right. Its not you. Apparently you're the perfect woman for him in his life. You appear to be very patient and... (read in full...)
B/f doesn't trust me at all and its driving me bats!
Q. Should i stay or should i go? my boyfriend of 1 year doesn't trust me at all. i don't give him reason not to trust me, i'm very faithful and loving and wouldn't dream of cheating. he accuses me daily of cheating, he genuinly thinks i already have ...
A. 24 September 2009: This is a real tough one. Your boyfriend as others have said, is insecure and he's failed to learn to trust you.
You have to sit down with him and tell him that the fact that he doesn't trust you is hurting you. His constant spying, snooping... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is very sexual when it comes to masturbation, but when it comes to me she wont let me get involved!
Q. [Moderator's Note: 2 questions from the same poster have been merged together] Sexually my girlfriend and i are having considerable problems due to lack of experience on both our parts and she also has vaginismus (which she is currently seeking ...
A. 24 September 2009: You seem to have a number of issues, but a lot of it is being hurt by her own insensitivity to your sexuality.
The first thing you need to do is be more secure in yourself as a man. Period. Absent that, she's going to wittingly or unwittin... (read in full...)
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