A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey,Really confused here.Basically, me and my girlfriend broke up 2 months ago due to 2 things really. She completetly lost interest in sex/couply thing. Before you say im shallow blah blah blah im not. Secondly we were constantly fighting, and we got to a stage where we have been going out for a while, things were getting to serious, but am not ready to settle down in a way (we are both 19, dated for nearly 2 years)Anyway last 2 months have been meh, we see each other everyday / 2 days either just to say hi or hang. Went to one of her family gathering, and some friends parties etc.It has been hard to try seperate my feelings for her with just friendship, but I think I did a good job. We maybe only kissed 1ce, but other than that we remained friends in the 2 months legit.Anyway the other day she states she wants to be bf with me minus the sex, as she is not intested in that, and basiicaly said she wanted to sleep over at my house after a party tonight. Tonight comes, she says she doesnt want to hurt me and wants to go to sleep at her house. She says doesnt wantto give me false feelings or something. It really hurt because her saying stuff like that in the first place gives me feelings etc. Anyway what am I doing in this relationship. Am I waisting my time here, does shecare about me, what should i do!! I am so confused because yea... no idea what to do....
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2009): Thank you very much guys for all your advice. I think its clear that I need to set a boundry with her. I dont want to lose her as she means alot to me, however no more couply things around her. I will remain as friends, have made it clear thats as far as its going to get and yea..
This problem is made hard btw because she lives 200 M away from me.. however thanks gain..!!
A
male
reader, softtouchmale2003  +, writes (26 September 2009):
 One of the problems I see here is a total lack of interest in intimacy. If she's not being affectionate with you, its pretty clear that her only interest in you now is that of some sort of a friend. That isn't cutting it for you, is it?
Fellini1973 has said it best. Run.
Shallow or not, if she can't be intimate with you, you're going to end up cheating on her eventually, which will make YOU look like the jerk and then she'll be crying foul.
Frankly, she doesn't know her own heart, doesn't know what she wants, and she's stringing you along.
Your best bet with her is say something like, "I need affection, intimacy and love. You want friendship, so I'm going to start dating again. We can still be friends, and by the way stop using me."
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A
male
reader, fellini1973 +, writes (26 September 2009):
I can't believe what I'm reading! With all due respects dude....What on earth are you still doing? I got 1 word for you...RUN!...don't walk RUN...You are truly wasting your time with this broad. Look, if she wanted you like you want her , shed be giving up the goods. What the hell? If thats the case why dont you hang out with your guy friends. Its the same thing isnt it? Theres nothing worse than a woman that dangles it in your face and refuses it at the same time. Your seriously wasting your time with this t___p. Move on with your life. This girl has absolutely no interest in you whatsoever. Im sure youre a great guy. By the sounds of it you seem to be a very respectful dude. Im sure you wont have a problem finding a nice girl that can give you some stability and intimacy. Someone who shares the same desire as you have as well. I know that there will be a bunch of broads coming on here giving you bull advice about "sex isnt everything" or "maybe she just wants to be cuddled"...lmao! Anyway, I dont mean to laugh at your situation but I pride myself in my honesty and my friend, it aint lookin to good for you.....Carry on Amigo! This cantina is closed! Peace!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 September 2009): i think you know the answer to this one yourself... this one is dead - it's time to move on! she seems to have made it quite clear she doesnt want the relationship any more. and wanting sex isn't shallow, it's part of a relationship. you even sound bored with the whole thing yourself! a clean break would make it easier on you in the long run.
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