| Latest articles: Just A Statement.....
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 February 2010: I just wanted to wish each and every person who visits this site a Very Happy Valentines Day! Whether you are with someone or not, here's wishing you all happiness, good health, and prosperity! ~Brooklyngirl~...
Everything Happens For a Reason - WHY?
This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 December 2009: I am a firm believer that "Everything Happens For a Reason!" The problem is that we don't know the reason! We can drive ourselves mad asking ourselves "WHY?" Why do people touch our lives and then disappear? Why is there so much pain and h...
|
How can you compare an old person dying to the death of a child???
Q. Our child died, not long time ago. The grief is unbelievable. But we are trying to deal with it. What is really a big question to me, how come the extended family doesn't seem to understand our pain. And, my really big problem is, that they com...
A. 13 February 2011: I am so sorry for your loss. I think Anonymous said it best!
You are entitled to your grieving no matter how long it goes on. And it's never something you get over. Life will just get a little easier to live.
I don't know why people would... (read in full...)
Am I insane for having a crush on a dead celebrity, and why did the crush develop?
Q. About 2 years ago in sixth form, there was this girl that i liked. She was part of our group of friends. I slowly began to develop a crush on her and towards the end of sixth form, around january of our final year, i confessed my feelings for her. ...
A. 13 February 2011: I think it was a form of protecting your heart from further rejection and pain. Having a crush on a Celebrity, whether dead or alive, is safe.
The will never hurt you, make you angry or disappoint you!!
We all hate and fear rejection. ... (read in full...)
How do you treat someone who is suffering with depression?
Q. How do you treat someone who is suffering with depression? My lover wont see a doctor... but it has affected our relationship. I hardly see him now... he says he cant face anyone and that he's no company... this has been going on for months. What ...
A. 13 February 2011: I know from my own experience, that when I am depressed...I don't want to do anything. I'm not good company for myself, let alone other people!
There is nothing you can do for him, if he's not willing to get the help necessary. He has to get to t... (read in full...)
My feelings seem illogical...
Q. My ex-boyfriend broke up with me months ago. We don't speak to each other anymore [he kind of just cut me out]. I feel like I'm moving on, but... I know I wouldn't want to be with him anymore, but it bothers me thinking of him with another gir...
A. 13 February 2011: It has been said that you know you are truly over a former lover, when you have moved on and are able to imagine, or see the ex with another! Until you reach that point, there are still feelings to be addressed.... (read in full...)
Boyfriend set up business against me... what do I do?
Q. I have a bit of a stange problem... and I really want advice as my friends and family have made their points very clear. My boyfriend and I split up approx 5 months ago and when we did.. he set up an entertainments business. The problem is I run on...
A. 13 February 2011: If he truly loves and cares for you, he would be willing to merge the two businesses and make a bigger and better business for the two of you!
It would be difficult for him to give up his business, and resume working for you.
But if you love... (read in full...)
It feels like hell when he can't even spare a thought for me!
Q. my boyfriend and i have been dating for almost 2 years. It was my birthday 2 months ago, and he didnt get me any present. Money is not an issue as he spends exuberantly on himself. i told him that it hurt me that i didnt receive anything,that he did ...
A. 18 December 2010: I would be upset too! It seems pretty selfish and inconsiderate to me!
Ask yourself, "Do I want to spend the rest of my life with someone who treats me this way?" If the answer is No, then you need to reevaluate the relationship and perhaps move... (read in full...)
My wife now wants a threesome. Who exactly will be the third person? Not me
Q. My wife has stated she would be open to a threesome encounter with a male or female. I'm not interested in being the third person in this. What can I do?...
A. 18 December 2010: If you feel that way, you should let her know! Don't "go along with it" just to please her. It could destroy your marriage!
That type of open relationship takes a different mindset, and going into it with reservations, will only cause pain... (read in full...)
Why do you think he behaves this way?
Q. Hello - Why do you think he behaves this way ? We dated for several months but ended last september. We never lost contact but definitely was less frequent. Anyway he always crossed the friendship line with those "I would like to be with you" com...
A. 30 November 2010: What I meant by that is that it has only been four days and you are asking for advice from us. Your feelings come through loud and clear (at least to me) that you are devastated he has not replied to your email.
I didn't realize that you neve... (read in full...)
I like bigger women and am having trouble dealing with it.
Q. I have a thing for bigger women and i dont know how to deal with it. While Im not into the deal of larger women getting larger or "gaining" and not into the feeding thing, i definitely have an appreciation for plus-sized women, and am unsure if my ...
A. 30 November 2010: It's not freaky to be attracted to larger women...but you are letting your friend's opinions dictate your behavior, and acting as though it is something dirty and shameful!
Most definitely, if you told a woman that you were with her because ... (read in full...)
Married and feeling attracted to the 19-year-old I'm teaching karate to!
Q. I am a 33 year old male.(most people say i look 25). I am married for three years and she is 25. I have just gone back to uni. I recently started teaching a 19 year old woman karate privately. She is absolutely fantastic, and not your average ...
A. 30 November 2010: "...because you are with someone?"
You are a married man! I assume you took those vows seriously three years ago, no???
Electrical??? And yet you don't think it's lust? Real, long lasting relationships don't start out with electricity.... (read in full...)
Why do you think he behaves this way?
Q. Hello - Why do you think he behaves this way ? We dated for several months but ended last september. We never lost contact but definitely was less frequent. Anyway he always crossed the friendship line with those "I would like to be with you" com...
A. 30 November 2010: You seem to be putting too much importance on your date with him. He obviously wants to be casual friends, perhaps with benefits. He may have sensed your assumption that he might want to get back with you. It may have scared him.
On the othe... (read in full...)
Why do you think he behaves this way?
Q. Hello - Why do you think he behaves this way ? We dated for several months but ended last september. We never lost contact but definitely was less frequent. Anyway he always crossed the friendship line with those "I would like to be with you" com...
A. 30 November 2010: I'm gonna agree with Cerberus on this one! You don't say how long it has been since you text him with your response. But no matter if has been a day or a month, it is your reaction that is the issue. Do you really want this going on during the ... (read in full...)
How do you stop thinking about what your ex is up to, and eradicate resentful feelings?
Q. I broke up with my ex-boyfriend a few months ago, and I'm moving on and stuff. We are not in contact and I've accepted that and I'm just moving on with my life. One problem is that now and again I have thoughts which crop up and bother me: I ...
A. 30 November 2010: It's perfectly normal! It will fade with time. Don't try to analyze your thoughts...it will drive you crazy!
As you get on with your life, you will find that you think about him less and less.... (read in full...)
Why am I hurting so much?
Q. Hey, I was in a relationship for about a year with a guy that i believed in my heart was the one. we got together and things were good for a few months then i started to feel like he was scolding me like a child, when he would hurt my feelings by ...
A. 30 November 2010: As DenimandLace44 said...you are grieving a loss. Also, you maybe are believing the negative things he has said to you. Don't!! Abusive people beat down their partner to gain control. That is what he has done to you. He told you he was in an ... (read in full...)
Is he going to marry me? Or not?
Q. Please help! My boyfriend of one year seems unsure if he wants to marry me. This really hurts me because at this pont am ready to be married to him. He used to be so sure about getting married--but lately he said.. we didnt get along so well that he ...
A. 30 November 2010: He is absolutely right! You just don't cut and run after one year! Why would he want to marry you if you aren't willing to work on problems together?
A happy, healthy relationship takes effort and hard work. It doesn't just happen.
And f... (read in full...)
When is verbal abuse too much verbal abuse?
Q. I have a lot to ask, but it all leads up to, "When has the verbal abuse gone "too" far? My husband and I have been together for 8 years, we just recently got married this year. 8/2010. We are both mid 30's, and we each have 2 children. This is his ...
A. 29 November 2010: Any Verbal Abuse is Too Much Verbal Abuse!!
Nobody deserves to be abused in any form. ... (read in full...)
I feel so stupid for running back to him, the abuse has started all over again! What should I do?
Q. Hi, So here is MAJOR issue im facing. Been with my "bf" for 4 and half years. Weve been closer then just the bf girlfriend relationship. (Id say its more like a marriage type of relationship, him staying at my home, our families meeting, planning...
A. 29 November 2010: My Heart goes out to you, Honey! I know exactly what you are feeling. I have been there! I left more times than I care to count. But always went back to him. And of course regretted it immediately. I don't know why we (abused women) return to ... (read in full...)
I pressured him into leaving his wife for me and now I havent heard from him in 2 weeks!
Q. i just broken up with my ex bf for 5yrs.then i met a man who made me happy.im at first we met on friendster and said he was single.he lied..he is married. We are madly in love with each other.he told me that he will divorce his wife. I pressured him ...
A. 29 November 2010: Don't believe everything you are told! The relationship started out with a lie. That should tell you something right there!
How does one build a healthy relationship on lies and deception. Doesn't that tell you something about his char... (read in full...)
Separated from wife, ill mom, and I don't know where to turn
Q. My situation is complicated. My wife and I have separated now for about a month. For the last year I have been staying and taking care of my 86 year old Mother at her house at night. We would travel between both houses so we could see my 2 children ...
A. 28 November 2010: My first suggestion would be to seek out an attorney that offers free consultation. They may be able to point you to someone you can afford. It is important that you get all the information and legal advice possible, including the situation with ... (read in full...)
My ex boyfriend disappeared on me, and I can't get over it
Q. I'm still heart broken, after 4 months. I was seeing my ex boyfriend for 1 year, even though it was a long distance relationship , he lived an hour and half away by train. I was very much in love with him. He last came to visit me for a week in ...
A. 28 November 2010: He's a coward and couldn't tell you face to face. I suspect he was already seeing someone else on his last visit. But didn't have the "guts" to tell you.
I am sorry for your pain and confusion, but now, it's time to just face the facts. He has ... (read in full...)
Wife has cheated on me twice, I'm struggling to take her back
Q. I met my wife when we were both 19 which was 16 years ago. We were together happily for about 6 years and then one night my wife got drunk and kissed my best friend in front of me. I think I battled with that for a while but we worked through ...
A. 28 November 2010: I suggest, as you try to work things out...take it slowly, and set some boundaries. Insist on couples therapy before moving in together.
There are no guarantees in life...for any of us...but there needs to be commitment.
I always say that the... (read in full...)
I just want to know if I’m a fool or should I just move on.
Q. So basically I’ve been seeing this guy for almost a month now, he's 22 and I’m 18. Were on the same course in uni but in different years, I’m in my first he’s in his last: S We met when we were drunk and swapped numbers, he’s such a lovely gu...
A. 28 November 2010: You say you've been told "he goes for bad-boys," but to me it sounds as though HE IS the bad boy. He's definitely a partier, and possibly a player.
I don't think he is ready for a monogamous relationship; and maybe this is just the way he is a... (read in full...)
She left without a real reason
Q. Ok...So I met this wonderful lady with 3 kids 4 years ago and started dating. I got scared because I really liked her and then all of a sudden she disappeared. 4 years later, we meet up again and I find out that she has watched me from a far ...
A. 20 November 2010: This woman obviously doesn't know how to carry on a relationship....you don't bolt because of "little things." You stick around, communicate, and work things out!
If she is not willing to do this, then maybe there is something else going on that... (read in full...)
Will I get any bigger?
Q. Hey guys, I know this is asked a lot but it's an issue I have to deal with. I'm so discouraged by my penis size. I'm a 16 year old boy and when you look at me you see a buff looking guy who you'd a assume has a larger than average size. But that's ...
A. 20 November 2010: We are our own worse critics! You are perfectly normal! Stop worrying!! You will be fine!... (read in full...)
How can I address the problems in my relationship in the right way, rather than always trying to break off?
Q. My boyfriend of three years (on and off) told me he can't trust me with his heart. He says my feelings are too "wishy/washy." My feelings always remain the same...I love him, however, I do not know how to handle problems so instead of dealing with ...
A. 9 November 2010: So Glad to hear it!! Just remember to be good to yourself too! :)... (read in full...)
Would anyone else see this as nosey?
Q. so i had to go with my parents to visit neighbors because they invited us..i am in my mid twenties and pretty much come to the conclusion i don't like them because most of them in the family are very stuck up and judgemental. We went to be nice more ...
A. 8 November 2010: I think the neighbor was just trying to get to know you....his questions were not uncommon at all.
... (read in full...)
How can I address the problems in my relationship in the right way, rather than always trying to break off?
Q. My boyfriend of three years (on and off) told me he can't trust me with his heart. He says my feelings are too "wishy/washy." My feelings always remain the same...I love him, however, I do not know how to handle problems so instead of dealing with ...
A. 7 November 2010: I have sent you a private message with a few suggestions... Above all, you need to convince him that you are willing to work on it, and that you want to be there "when it comes down to the wire." And remember...Actions speak louder than words! ... (read in full...)
How can I address the problems in my relationship in the right way, rather than always trying to break off?
Q. My boyfriend of three years (on and off) told me he can't trust me with his heart. He says my feelings are too "wishy/washy." My feelings always remain the same...I love him, however, I do not know how to handle problems so instead of dealing with ...
A. 7 November 2010: Time to grow up and start dealing with problems rather than running from them. By running you are making things worse, as you obviously realize now!
When there is a problem in a healthy relationship...the couple talks it out and comes up with a s... (read in full...)
I worry that she will become what I did and get herself into awful situations. How can I help her out?
Q. Hi- I'm female from the UK- and I'm in a dilemma. When I was 15,I went through a horrendous phase which involved me doing many things I regret. There is no need to go into detail with what happened, but I went 'off the rails' and got into some...
A. 7 November 2010: All you can do is share YOUR experience with her...what she does with the information is entirely out of your control...
You can let her know that you are there for her, it she ever needs to talk about anything.
I wouldn't tell her that you see... (read in full...)
Confusing signals - does she like me?
Q. This girl at my school kissed me,slapped, and told me she loved me all in one day. Does she like me or not?...
A. 7 November 2010: OKay then...why don't you ask her if she likes you???... (read in full...)
Is masturbating just like having sex?
Q. i always press on my virginia tell i orgasm and it's feel cool but the thing is that i want to stay a virgin tell my wedding night and i think that this is like having sex ,i just cant stop it am still a young teen what can i do?? ...
A. 6 November 2010: Masturbation is perfectly normal, and if anything will help you to maintain your virginity! Stick to your convictions and don't give in to pressure to have sex!
Good Luck!... (read in full...)
11 years older married man wants to have sex, is he just going to use me?
Q. Ok, I'm in a relationship but I have a frienship with an older man 11 yrs my senior anyhow he's married. It all started out as a friendship that developed into a much more intimate one, but the thing is he says he wants to bring it to the next ...
A. 6 November 2010: You say you are in a relationship! What about respect for the person you are with?
Of course he just wants to use you for sex...do you really think he will leave his wife for you? It doesn't happen very often, and when it does....they cheat on y... (read in full...)
Confusing signals - does she like me?
Q. This girl at my school kissed me,slapped, and told me she loved me all in one day. Does she like me or not?...
A. 6 November 2010: Question is...do you like having to deal with mixed messages like that? You haven't given enough information for us to answer your question. We don't know her, we don't know you...... (read in full...)
He says he cannot trust me. How can I show him that I am there for him?
Q. Some may be familiar with my situation, some may not. Long story short, was with my ex and we broke up said I nagged and complained. He got another girlfriend then he and I came back together. We are communicating again and both still care for ...
A. 6 November 2010: Trust is one of the most important keys of a healthy relationship, along with honesty and communication. You can't "make" someone trust you. All you can do is earn trust by not giving him any reason not to!
Petinal hit it dead on! You are stro... (read in full...)
My long distance boyfriend is coming, and I don't know how to act.
Q. hi my long distance boyfriend is coming to visit me next week,it would be the 2th time we meet but i feel so nervous and i dont know what to do,where to go,what to say ...maybe because we didnt see eachother for 8 months. any advice? also,i ...
A. 5 August 2010: Just be yourself! It's normal to be nervous. Once he arrives, your nerves will calm! Trust me! Been there!
As far as a gift, get something to go with his interests.
Good Luck and Have a Blast!
~BG~... (read in full...)
I haven't heard from my long-distance boyfriend for a week! How long is too long?
Q. How long is a long time to wait for a guy? Dear all - I have been involved with a LDR guy who isn't the most reliable guy in the world but I do care for him and he has been making contact regularly to me. However, recently he hasn't been in t...
A. 5 August 2010: Well...in my opinion, if I hadn't heard from my guy in a week, I would start worrying!
I too am in an LDR. We talk every night and sometimes twice on the weekend. That has been our pattern for over a year.
I get nervous when he is late com... (read in full...)
Holiday pill popping!
Q. I'm on the Pill and have to take it at the same time each day (7pm UK time) However, I'm going away on holiday where the time difference is 3 hours ahead. So do I just take it at 7pm local time? Or at 10pm local time, which would be 7pm in the UK? ...
A. 4 June 2010: Take it at 10:00 p.m., and when you return home...begin taking it at 7p.m. again.... (read in full...)
Why does he need to have these other girls in his life?
Q. I have been with my fiance for 4 years, we have a 1 yr old son together. Out of these 4 years there have been 5 "other women" in our relationship. He has never physically cheated on me, but he tends to build friendships with other women behind my ...
A. 14 May 2010: Sounds to me that there is an underlying problem! A husband/boyfriend, should not have to go to other women when there are problems at home! He should be discussing the problems with you. How is his talking to other's resolve problems with ... (read in full...)
I want to end this friends with benefits situation with my ex?? Suggestions?
Q. Hello, I've been in a physical relationship with my ex boyfriend for the past 3 months. Prior to this we had dated for almost a year, when I decided to break up with him. I did this because I felt my needs were not being met. He was thoughtf...
A. 14 May 2010: I have to agree with all the previous answers. It may have been enjoyable at first, and a matter of each of you using the other to meet physical needs...but as you say...it no longer feels right to you!
For us women, sex is emotional as well as p... (read in full...)
Will I be able to meet a future girlfriend without relying on my work/occupation to find her?
Q. I'm 22 at university and I'm currently doing a masters in Civil Engineering. I've had 2 girlfriends before and after my last one I decided to concentrate on my exams and wait until I start working (after I've done a bit of travelling). ALthough...
A. 14 May 2010: The answer is yes! You say you want to do some travelling...what better way to meet people??? And as far as your field...there are women in every field these days! You will meet someone! I promise!!... (read in full...)
| *rooklyngirl's friends
These are mutual friends, so *rooklyngirl has
added them and they have added *rooklyngirl!
|
