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... Send *inktopaz a private message | | | *inktopaz's profile:I'm 29 and born and raised in California.
I've gone through quite a few relationships! Some were great and some were down right terrible!
I really enjoy trying to help people get through relationship woes. Sometimes they can be life consuming and everyone can use a little help from time-to-time.
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He's straight and I'm gay. How can I stop falling in love with him?
Q. I'm gay and I love one of my best friends and I told them a couple of months ago. They made it clear that they aren't, but they said that they respected the fact that I'm gay. I feel awkward when ever I pass him in the halls at school and I tryed to ...
A. 25 May 2010: You have far worse problems than the one you have with you friend...repelling ghosts and now you're diagnosing yourself as clinically depressed. Go see a doctor, PLEASE!... (read in full...)
Do I wait for HIM to contact ME?
Q. I met a man over 3 years ago, first we just talked( as friends) then we dated then we were FWB, i fell for him HARD...........he is sweet, well mannered, easy to talk to and he made me feel so good when we slept together BUT he was not ready to ...
A. 17 May 2010: Well at least you talked to him and now you know. It makes it easier to move on. You'll find a nice guy, don't worry.... (read in full...)
Will our relationship be negatively affected by this?
Q. Me and my boifrend masterbate while talking on the phone evryday. Can this harm me in any way?...
A. 20 April 2010: You may develop hairy palms and blindness.... (read in full...)
Is she cheating, or is there something else lacking in our relationship?
Q. I have a problem i drive truck over the road and i like what i do. I am gone for a month and half at a time. I meet this girl and we hit it off right away and been dating for 5 months at first we would talk on the phone for hours on end about ...
A. 20 April 2010: Based on what you said, I wouldn't say she's cheating unless you have more details. She could be waiting to call you back so she doesn't seem like such a nag because it sounds like she wants to talk to you more. If you can't see her for more than ... (read in full...)
He's straight and I'm gay. How can I stop falling in love with him?
Q. I'm gay and I love one of my best friends and I told them a couple of months ago. They made it clear that they aren't, but they said that they respected the fact that I'm gay. I feel awkward when ever I pass him in the halls at school and I tryed to ...
A. 20 April 2010: Just like how your friends respect that you're gay, you also need to respect that they're straight and nothing is going to happen. Just come to terms that they are only friends and people that you cannot be romantically involved with. If you have ... (read in full...)
Help!! I'm physically, spiritually, and emotionally drained from my lazy husband.
Q. My husband and I have been married for nine years and we have three wonderful kids. He works at the local sherrif's department and I work at a local lawyer's office. I work from 8:00a.m.-5:00p.m. and he works from 4:00p.m.-midnight. During the ...
A. 20 April 2010: If he's not going to do it, then get someone else who will! I don't mean another man, but if he can't do simple chores around the house, then get someone to come to the house once a week or every other week to clean. It's usually not that ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says he doesn't want to marry until until I get a better job
Q. My boyfriend of four years hasn't proposed yet and doesn't know when he will. We had a discussion last night about it because I'm tired of waiting. Basically he's told me that he can't marry me unless I get a different job that pays more and is m...
A. 20 April 2010: I don't know if I would consider not being married to him a form of punishment. But, I also think it's an excuse he's using. Most men don't really care what you do for a living as long as it's a respectable job and you have some sort of goals for ... (read in full...)
I text like there's no tomorrow, and my parents get really mad!
Q. So I've gone over my texting limit before, and my parents always get REALLY mad. I think last month I went over by 100 (not even) this time I went over by like 1,600. :( Is there a way to fix this issue?! I don't even wanna know how much it's gonna ...
A. 20 April 2010: First, get a hobby. Second, talk on the phone and text less especially if it's an entire conversation. Third, I agree with the prepaid phone, when you go over your texts, you're done and if you want more you'll have to pay for more. Otherwise, ... (read in full...)
How can I find someone in my school who is gay?
Q. I'm 13 and Im not sure if I am Gay or Bi. Recently I've been looking at half Naked pictures of Boys and then Girls when I look it the boys I go hard straight away and usually think their really hot but with girls I look at the boobs and don't get ...
A. 18 April 2010: You don't even know if you're gay half the time, how do you think you'd be able to spot another? At your age, it may not be as easy to tell. But I've known men from elementary school that grew up to be gay, and from the time I knew what gay was, I ... (read in full...)
I'm about to run away
Q. [Moderator note: this post has been edited for clarity] my mom promised me a phone for christmas. She said the place was too busy and she said we'd get one 'tomorrow'. That happened again and I still didnt get it. Today she got a phone (for herse...
A. 14 April 2010: Haha!!! You're seriously considering running away because of a phone? Believe it or not, back in my day, I didn't get a cell phone until I was 17 and back then that was young to have one. Don't you have at least a house phone? And what's this ... (read in full...)
Is sex something bonding for women?
Q. Do women become more attached to men they've had sex with? I've had a drawn-out flirtation with a woman. We are never single at the same time. I sometimes wonder if she thinks about me (we were pretty inappropriate for a while at one point when I ...
A. 14 April 2010: Yeah, for the most part it's true. I guess for very few women it's just to "get off." But I kind of think they're full of you-know-what. If it's sex just once, then maybe not. However, there are girls that do have sex with a guy once and they ... (read in full...)
Could I be pregnant from oral sex?
Q. I recently gave my boyfriend oral sex and he did the same for me, but since then I've been feeling strange. Could I be pregnant?...
A. 14 April 2010: Yes, except the baby comes out of your butt.... (read in full...)
In round about way I accused b/f of cheating and now I haven't heard from him
Q. I think I screwed up my relationship with my boyfriend. We have been dating for about five months, and we usually talk everyday and see each other at least two or three times a week (we live far away from each other). The last time I saw him, ...
A. 13 April 2010: Okay, here's another thing you should not tolerate: a guy who ignores you. If your boyfriend ignores you and gives you the silent treatment for days because he's "mad," in my opinion, is passive aggressive behavior and borderline abusive. Nothing ... (read in full...)
Were not exclusively dating so is it cheating to go on other dates?
Q. I have been dating a guy for about two months. We've known each other since last summer and just talked on and off. We have made out and acted as a couple out in public. But still have not had sex or talked about being exclusive. We text pretty much ...
A. 13 April 2010: I meant not exclusive*... (read in full...)
How can a person fall out of love overnight?
Q. So here is a background, my boyfriend and I have been together a little over a year. We live about 1.5 hrs apart and see each other at least once a week. He's a firefighter so on the days he is working, he can't always text me. He has this big test ...
A. 13 April 2010: He didn't fall out of love with you overnight. It sounds like you two did have a good relationship so he probably had to do something thinking before actually ending the relationship. What he is saying is true, he think you're beautiful, smart, ... (read in full...)
Were not exclusively dating so is it cheating to go on other dates?
Q. I have been dating a guy for about two months. We've known each other since last summer and just talked on and off. We have made out and acted as a couple out in public. But still have not had sex or talked about being exclusive. We text pretty much ...
A. 13 April 2010: If you're exclusive, then no, it's not cheating. So what if you had a one-night-stand one time and you used protection? You're an adult woman and you have your needs. Don't feel bad about it. And honestly, if any sort of relationship were to ... (read in full...)
He is in a band and 10 years older than me! I like him..should I date him?
Q. I have a problem. I think I like someone who is in my cousins band. We have met before but that was a couple years ago and we saw each other a while. But now I added him on myspace and I just have a feeling that I like him. I don't know what I ...
A. 13 April 2010: Umm forget the whole you don't have a chance scenario. Unless you want him to get put into jail for being a pedifile, then back off. If you're 13-15 and he's 23-25, he shouldn't be dating you anyway. Find someone closer to your age.... (read in full...)
He stopped contact, suddenly..did I offend him..did he get bored with me? Any advice?
Q. Hi I started chatting to a man over the internet about 3 months ago, now all of a sudden he has stop communicating with me. We usually have some form of contact at least every day or every second day either by phone,text or email. But its bee...
A. 13 April 2010: Sounds like unless he's in the hospital in a coma, he lost interest or another girl came along. Don't waste a text message on him, if he can't be bothered by you why should you be bothered by him?... (read in full...)
Did my past infidelities cause my wife's cervical cancer. This guilt is eating me alive! Help!
Q. I am married and have been unfaithful to my wife through out our whole marriage, and not with the same girl. I always used protection because I did not want to be responsible for an STD. I have changed and now I am a new man thanks to my religion I ...
A. 13 April 2010: If you passed along HPV, then yes it's a possibility.... (read in full...)
Could Iget pregnant like that?
Q. did i lose my virginity? his penis went in sort of, like it hurt like hell, but only like a quarter of it went in, does that count? could i get pregnant like that? we used a condom jus wanna know for definate , coz i dont think my hymen broke th...
A. 12 April 2010: Regardless if your hymen is still intact, if you've had a penis in your vagina (1/4, 1/2, 1/8 in) then you are not a virgin. The probability of you being pregnant in these circumstances...probably 1%. There's always a chance of getting pregnant, ... (read in full...)
Do I wait for HIM to contact ME?
Q. I met a man over 3 years ago, first we just talked( as friends) then we dated then we were FWB, i fell for him HARD...........he is sweet, well mannered, easy to talk to and he made me feel so good when we slept together BUT he was not ready to ...
A. 12 April 2010: Hmm...well in my opinion, a guy doesn't really want to be your friend (or even your best friend for that matter) if he doesn't have at least some feelings for you. I think once you're done with school you can contact him. Be careful not to bombard ... (read in full...)
Are there love spells you can cast that actually work?
Q. hi there are many webistes online claming to cast spells that would really work.there is this spell casting women named ashra she is the us top most american cast speller of 2009 do u think he can really cast a love spell that will work? Please...
A. 12 April 2010: Well that depends if you also believe in faries, wizards, and dragons! ... (read in full...)
Did he break up with me because his feelings were too strong?
Q. Is it possible to have a guy have such strong feelings for you, that they dont know what to do with them and they end up just running away from it all? Especially when this person feels like they always need to be the tough guy and it's hard for...
A. 11 April 2010: Unless he's THAT afraid of being hurt and just drops the relationship because of that, then I guess it's a possibility. But, I think that's a lame excuse and he's using that to hide his real reasons. He just might not be ready for a relationship ... (read in full...)
Would he still want me if he knew I had a son?
Q. there is a guy who i have been going out with for 3 weeks he dosent know about my son and im scared to tell him in case he dosent accept me and my son are a deal he has me he accepts my son to its starting to worry me so i try not bring up my ...
A. 11 April 2010: Well your son is a part of you and someone will have to either accept it or not. Obviously, if they cannot acccept it, then you cannot accept them either.
However, being that you're 13-15 and already have a child...I think your primary focus sh... (read in full...)
I've dated all kinds of people, but I can't find Mr Right!
Q. Dear cupid, I dont understand what I'm doing wrong or if anything at all. I know what I am attracted to but it seems that every time I get involved with some one I get let down each time worse than the time before. Then I see my relatives and frie...
A. 9 April 2010: It sounds like you're looking too hard. You want some guy to fit every aspect of some criteria you have and if he doesn't have it then he's not right. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but if you do have too high of expectations, you're only ... (read in full...)
Leaving for the Navy, ... but my girlfriend wants to get married before I go.
Q. Hi, I am 23 yrs old, and have been with my girlfriend for about 3 1/2 years now. This isnt including a period of time we were broken up for about 6 months about a year ago. Anyway during this period of singleness, I enlisted in the US Navy. Th...
A. 9 April 2010: If you don't want to marry her now, then don't do it. You're still very young and have a lot ahead of you. I live in a city where there's a lot of military, including the Navy, and A LOT of those marriages fail. You're gone for so many months at ... (read in full...)
Present for my ex-girl friend?
Q. So, my now ex-girlfriend and I broke up about four months ago, over some personality quirks of mine and we sort of agreed it would be better for her if the relationship ended. Her birthday is coming up soon and I wanted to get her something nice ...
A. 8 April 2010: You don't get her anything at all. If you two have only been broken up for 4-months and you want to get her a gift for her birthday that shows that you still care about her, she will definitely think you want her back. Obviously, you have some ... (read in full...)
Should I go on a date with a married man? He's so hot
Q. Hello guys I'm a 22 year old woman and well i was getting some work done waiting for the owner to get an estimate and this super hot guy walked in he kept checking me out so neways he was like your incredibly beautiful and I told him thanks he kept ...
A. 8 April 2010: This proves that having a degree doesn't mean jack about a person's intelligence.... (read in full...)
He doesn't want what I want and I have fallen for him!
Q. DEAR CUPID I have been "dating/messing" around with this guy that works @ my job for two months now. He is 34 I am 22, in the beginning he told me he wasn’t really looking for anything serious but unfortunately I disregarded all of that and now I ...
A. 8 April 2010: Now it's time to move on. Don't date/mess around with him anymore and don't talk to him outside of work. Avoid him at work if you can, but still try to maintain professional if you can't avoid him. I'm sure you can't help but run into him from ... (read in full...)
Is it ok to let the guy do most of the work?
Q. This might be a strange question. I'm wondering if it's ok to let the guy do most of the work when you're in a relationship...setting up dates, calling you, etc. I've been with my BF for about 7 months. In the beginning I felt that the asking ...
A. 8 April 2010: If you're in a relationship and it's been 7-months, then yes, it's okay to initiate things some of the time. ... (read in full...)
Am I over reacting to his comments pertaining to our relationship
Q. Hello, I've been seeing a man in another country. We see each other a few times a month for over a year now.Originally we decided that after a year we would decide if we were gonna work towards marriage or not. It's been almost 15 months and he do...
A. 6 April 2010: No...not overreacting. He's kind of throwing up some red flags there: the other woman and he's afraid to get married because he's worried about you? BS! It sounds like he's a bit confused and he's afraid that he might just be settling with you. ... (read in full...)
His ex gf moved in with 'his' Mom! This has upset me! What can I do?
Q. Long Story short. Me and my guy have been together for a couple years now. His ex-girlfriend of 6 years just moved in with his mom and it's driving me crazy. My BF and I live together about 20miles away from his mom, "all of a sudden", his mom calls ...
A. 6 April 2010: Don't worry about feeling insecure in this situation, even the most secure person would feel threatened by this. Yes, it'a bit odd that his ex is living with his mom and how mom is now making excuses for him to come over. All you can do is tell ... (read in full...)
What s up with these unuusal headaches
Q. For the past month I have had headaches on and off. Only in the morning, and they get better as the day goes on..But they're not really headaches but this weird feeling in my head. I also have a stuffy nose, especially when I lay down. I can't ...
A. 6 April 2010: Well it could be various things. Don't freak yourself out too much about brain tumors, anything is a possibility, but it's unlikely. If you're getting sick, that definitely can cause headaches. Also being dehydrated, migraines, or you could just ... (read in full...)
Slipping Out! Why?
Q. This is very embarassing to ask but I really need some advice. My boyfriend and I were having sex. We've only done it a few times before so we're fairly new to this but for some reason he couldn't get in me for a long time. Or as soon as he got ...
A. 6 April 2010: Umm your vagina muscles wouldn't push his penis out...if you tighten your muscles like doing a kegel it just wraps tighter around his penis.... (read in full...)
Slipping Out! Why?
Q. This is very embarassing to ask but I really need some advice. My boyfriend and I were having sex. We've only done it a few times before so we're fairly new to this but for some reason he couldn't get in me for a long time. Or as soon as he got ...
A. 5 April 2010: Usually it has to do with size...small penises usually have that problem. But if he isn't on the smaller side, I agree, it has to do with angle. If you're on top and you're sitting to far back or too high, it can happen. Same with not being fully ... (read in full...)
Is my FWB developing feelings for me?
Q. i have a friend that i have sex with from time to time and i think his getting feelings for me. his friends say he dont like you like that he just using you, but when me and him get together i dont feel that, i feel like hes catching feelings for ...
A. 5 April 2010: Based on what you said...we would have no idea. A guy going down on you really doesn't mean anything in my opinion, a lot of guys just like to do that regardless if you're just FWB. But if you feel that he is developing feelings for you, as in he ... (read in full...)
I want to earn her trust back
Q. I recently cheated on my girlfriend of 5yrs. no sex involved just kissing once at a bar and then she came over to my house the next night.my gf found out after i had lied about it because i was to afraid to hurt her and tell her what i had done. it ...
A. 4 April 2010: Consider yourself lucky that your girlfriend is dumb enough to want to still be friends with you after what you did. If you loved her so much and didn't want to lose her, then shouldn't you have thought about that before you made out with some girl ... (read in full...)
My mother never lets me out of the house
Q. my mom doesn't let me out the house ever! once in a while she would let me have the rare opportunity to go to a b-day party, but only if it doesn't involve boys! i tried talking to her but nothing changes. I've stopped asking if i can go out cuz i ...
A. 4 April 2010: Your mother is just over protective. My parents were the same way. There's really probably nothing you can do, believe me, I tried it all back then. Just deal with it, you're a child and unfortunately, your mother has a say in your social life. ... (read in full...)
Should I take a chance on an old flame?
Q. I have been married for 20 years and I am now at a crossroads in my life. I enjoy my Husband's company and I think I still love him. But I don't think I want to be married to him anymore. Any reasons I have for this seam to be minor and could ...
A. 4 April 2010: That's a better question for a therapist. But since you've been having this so-called emotional affair for the past 13-years while you've been married and he's engaged, sounds to me like you two deserve one another. Maybe when you're together you ... (read in full...)
When I spend a lot of time with her I feel claustrophobic, does anyone else have this problem?
Q. I'm dating this girl who moved from Arizon to where to Long Beach and we've been seeing each other for four months. Everytime we spend a lot of time together, I start to feel claustrophobic. I've been honest with her about these feelings but we both ...
A. 4 April 2010: So it kind of sounds to me that you're settling with her so you won't be alone again. If you're with the right person, you shouldn't feel that way. So I think you have a decision to make; stay with her and continue feeling the way that you do, or ... (read in full...)
The sex is too intense!
Q. I have an INTENSE attraction for someone, and he has the same feelings for me. When we kiss it feels like my whole body is vibrating and I have literally had an orgasm just "dry humping." We do have sex sometimes but it's almost too much, the ...
A. 4 April 2010: If you get yours and he gets his...I don't see what the problem is.... (read in full...)
My 'goldenchild' sister can do no wrong!
Q. I don’t know what to do anymore. My sister has, for many years, liked to stir up trouble between my parents and I by trying to play me off against them and then putting on this ‘saint’ act towards my parents which they fall for every time. The ...
A. 3 April 2010: I can see why you'd be upset. I have a cousin like that, not quite as bad, but she won't invite me to some things (not all the time, just sometimes) but then go out with MY friends and will do things for them that she doesn't do for me! Definitely ... (read in full...)
Boyfriends mother excludes me from family events.
Q. Please help me out on this! My potential mother-in-law leaves me out of family gatherings such as Easter, inviting instead someone my bf used to go out with, whom she prefers, and whom she has a close relationship with and adores. Every holiday I am ...
A. 3 April 2010: I think it's good that you told your boyfriend how you feel in this situation. I think you have every right to feel how you do. I would definitely feel the same way if I were in your shoes along with many other people. Your future mother-in-law ... (read in full...)
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