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... Send *inktopaz a private message | | | *inktopaz's profile:I'm 29 and born and raised in California.
I've gone through quite a few relationships! Some were great and some were down right terrible!
I really enjoy trying to help people get through relationship woes. Sometimes they can be life consuming and everyone can use a little help from time-to-time.
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Facebook concerns.
Q. *OP's own title* 1, I see more and more people installing something like ""who checked your profile""... That creeps me ,because I do like to check profile with innocent curiosity, but I dont want to look like a stalker because IM not.. Do you gu...
A. 26 March 2010: No, wall interactions don't always count. There is one that tells you who views it more often. I used it once and one of which was a friend who hardly makes wall posts on mine or her own. Maybe it's not completely legit, but if it's based on wall ... (read in full...)
Is this illegal in South Carolina?
Q. I am 18 and my girlfriend is 16 is it legal for us to have sex in the state of South Carolina? If not and we were to get caught would I be branded as a sex offender for the rest of my life? ...
A. 26 March 2010: Google your state laws.... (read in full...)
Is it safe to have another abortion when my last was only in December 09?
Q. I recently went through an abortion in December of last year. The baby was my current boyfriend's. Well, I'm extremely worried that I could be pregnant again. I'm not 100% certian. I'll take a test in about a week. But I'm having similar symptoms as ...
A. 26 March 2010: Do whatever is in your heart. Yes, it's stupid that you weren't more careful, especially after being in the situation before. But some people really shouldn't be parents, and of course giving your child up for adoption is an option but I was very ... (read in full...)
Facebook concerns.
Q. *OP's own title* 1, I see more and more people installing something like ""who checked your profile""... That creeps me ,because I do like to check profile with innocent curiosity, but I dont want to look like a stalker because IM not.. Do you gu...
A. 25 March 2010: No...they don't. All they do is tell you who of your friends looks at your profile most. I don't think facebook would really allow such a thing anyway because a lot of people would probably quit using it...a lot of people keep tabs on people from ... (read in full...)
Is it safe to have another abortion when my last was only in December 09?
Q. I recently went through an abortion in December of last year. The baby was my current boyfriend's. Well, I'm extremely worried that I could be pregnant again. I'm not 100% certian. I'll take a test in about a week. But I'm having similar symptoms as ...
A. 25 March 2010: Okay, I'm going to judge you only because I've had one before, so it's not like I haven't been in your shoes before....but I cannot believe you would even consider doing that again. Regardless if it's safe, it's not a form of birth control. Didn't ... (read in full...)
Will our baby have a birth defect? No judemental answers please.
Q. im having a relationship with my 1st cousin. I love him so much i would die for him and he would for me the thing is we want to have a baby but im afraid it might be born with a birth defect. I know what people are thinking were sick and its gros ...
A. 24 March 2010: Yes, having a child with your 1st counsin definitely increases your chances of it having a birth defect. That is why in many places incest is illegal. When you have a child with a relative it increases the chances of defects because you carry ... (read in full...)
Am I being unreasonable here??
Q. I need URGENT advice here, Me and and my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years were due to view an apartment this evening which had been planned a few weeks ago. We were hoping to move into this apartment on 24th April, very soon. There has been a lot of ...
A. 24 March 2010: Yes, I think you're being unreasonable. Sure, you've had this planned for months, but his brother's girlfriend can't just hold in the baby because you planned to view some apartment. Viewing an apartment can be postponed. Regardless if his ... (read in full...)
How can I convince my mother to drive me two hours away?
Q. Ok so ive just started dating this guy ive known him for 7 months i went 2 go visit him last weekend he lives 2 hrs away....now this is where it gets difficult. I do not have a car but my mom has let me used her car before, but what i need help on ...
A. 24 March 2010: If he has a car and is willing to pitch in for gas in the first place, ask him to come pick you up. If you two are both adults, I don't see why there isn't a reason why you two can't work it out. If you want to badly enough, there's always ... (read in full...)
Do you think my ex would change if I were to go back to her?
Q. Hi all, i really need some help here !! I split up with my girlfriend of 9 months about 6 weeks ago and we've had a really tough time since saying some really nasty things to each other. She finished with me becuase she said she wasn't happy an...
A. 24 March 2010: Umm...your ex only wants you back because you've started seeing someone else. No, she won't change, she'll be better for a little bit, then she'll go back to her old ways. The new girl isn't any better than your ex in my opinion. It looks like ... (read in full...)
I am pregnant by donor insemination, but the kids I teach are saying I got drunk and knocked up!
Q. Alright, so im an 8th grade teacher and im 27 years old. I haven't been in a relationship in about 5 years ago, and everyone seems to be taken. My students seem to all know this information about me and they are talking. When I was talking with one ...
A. 24 March 2010: Honestly...they're 8th graders. Who gives a flying you-know-what about what they think? It's your business and there's no need for you to explain jack to them. I also don't think too many of those kids' parents would appreciate you talking about ... (read in full...)
Is he really attracted to me? Or does he still like girls what are a size 0?
Q. I just started dating this guy a couple weeks ago and he has been bringing up his x girlfriends all the time. He always says he likes me and stuff but he still ALWAYS brings them up. It didn't really bug me until I decided to be a facebook creeper ...
A. 23 March 2010: I agree that it's not good that he's always talking about ex girlfriends. Are you a potential love interest or his therapist? Obviously he's not ready to move on if he's always bringing them up, and I honestly don't think it has anything to do ... (read in full...)
Is this normal after a break up?
Q. My sister broke up with her boyfriend because he was cheating and so I've been spending all my time with her. She's really upset and has been crying a lot so I've just being telling her I love her and taking care of her. The last couple of nights ...
A. 23 March 2010: I don't really think it's "normal" or "common." I guess everyone handles things like this differently and I don't doubt that it does happen. I don't think your sister is trying to put the moves on you or anything, but I have 2 older sisters and I ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend injured my brother playing soccer
Q. My brother and boyfriend play football (soccer) for different teams but they were playing each other. My boyfriend tackled my brother and my brother was in agony on the floor. He had to be taken to hospital and his ankle is broken. My boyfriend says ...
A. 23 March 2010: I'm confused...what's the question? Do we think your boyfriend is aggressive and evil and did it on purpose, or do we think your bro is a pansy?... (read in full...)
Is he interested in anything more than sex with me?
Q. This guy and I have been "talking" since Christmas. We've talked before in the past but things always sizzled out being as we live about 2 hours from each other and don't get to see each other that often. Well, this is the longest we have talked and ...
A. 23 March 2010: I'm kind of curious as to how his ex was able to contact you and tell you all this? Anyhow, it sounds like when you spent the night and he didn't get any he lost interest because that's all he wanted. Be happy that you didn't end up having sex ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend does not seem interested in my sexy texts. Why?
Q. I am trying new sexual things w/my boyfriend because he brought it to my attention. But when I try to send him a sexy text message he just goes to bed or seems uninterested. why???...
A. 22 March 2010: Hmmm usually guys are pretty responsive to that. I could only assume that maybe he's unsure of what to say back. I've had boyfriends send me sexy texts before but I didn't know what to say back or I was afraid of what I would say would look stupid ... (read in full...)
I would love someone to tell me that my decision to see a married man is right.
Q. I've already made my decision, I guess like most women I would love to have someone tell me it is the right one but that is not likely. I've agreed to an affair with a married man. We were together when we were very young and I ended it because...
A. 22 March 2010: OP...those actually are less of an excuse than what you originally posted. I would be cautious considering that he could just be saying this stuff to you to feel better about seeing him...as in his wife is the bad guy and he's the good guy so it's ... (read in full...)
I would love someone to tell me that my decision to see a married man is right.
Q. I've already made my decision, I guess like most women I would love to have someone tell me it is the right one but that is not likely. I've agreed to an affair with a married man. We were together when we were very young and I ended it because...
A. 22 March 2010: So you made the decision to be selfish along with him...that's not good. You don't want to hurt his family, but you will. Sorry, lady, but I think you're right in knowing that no one is going to tell you that it's right. It's never right. Just ... (read in full...)
Parents want to get divorced. Should we talk to them or let them figure it out?
Q. This question isn't about my relationships but my parents and whether or not I should get involved. Long story short, my parents have been married for 35 years. I don't think they've ever gone 2 months without arguing about something and su...
A. 22 March 2010: I think you should let them know that you're not going to take sides and that if they're not happy in their marriage that you respect their decision and you're there for them to lean on if they need some support or need someone to talk to.... (read in full...)
Why do I hurt others?
Q. I want to make this short and honest as possible.I am a very nice person,but sometimes for some strange reason I do things that hurt others.For example I would de-friend people on Facebook,and send them a message telling them what I did.Other times ...
A. 21 March 2010: I think that's a better question for your therapist that you should have. My guess is if you intentionally want to "hurt" other people by defriending them on facebook (which I guess is hurtful to some sensitive groups) or tell girls to get lost; it ... (read in full...)
Should I cling to the hope we will fall in love one day?
Q. I’m 13. I’m a really competitive basketball player, and I have been going to this training place for, oh, 2, years or so, to help with my conditioning. My problem is there’s this trainer who I have a huge crush on. Let’s call him “John”. He’s 22. ...
A. 21 March 2010: Trust me, by the time you're 18 you won't even care about him anymore. It's okay to have a crush on an older boy, girls always do. But definitely don't cling onto any hope that you two will ever be an item...a lot changes in just a matter of days. ... (read in full...)
Should I go and meet a guy from the past when I'm married?
Q. Recently and old "friend" has contacted me through facebook. We have not seen each other in 21 years. And we had sexual relations at the time. I feel that everything happens for a reason. And I think that we are developing some feelings for one ...
A. 21 March 2010: I agree, you need to fix your marriage first or get a divorce. If you start seeing this guy behind your husband's back, it only looks bad on you. I know you don't feel like you're getting what you need in your marriage, but there's obviously a ... (read in full...)
He's married but I got pregnant and now he cheats!
Q. I have a very serious problem i met my kids father 8yrs. ago and we started out having sex before we got to no each other i was very sexual back then i was young single, no kids and very dumb and i meet him and i was instantly hooked the sex was ...
A. 21 March 2010: I'm sorry, but isn't it a bit late to be wondering what you can do??? You've gotten yourself into quite a mess and now there's not much you can do besides depend on yourself and I think you're pretty much to the point where you know that's what you ... (read in full...)
Is it really wrong of me to talk to his mate?
Q. Hi all, I just need to get your views on this stupid situation I am in. I've been seeing this guy for a few months. He introduced me to his friends a few months ago. I clicked with one of his friends straight away. Anyway this week, I saw m...
A. 21 March 2010: You really can't be this clueless...you're 26-29 and don't get why this is wrong? Okay, think if he was talking to one of your girlfriends more than he talks to you. Umm would you be happy? No. And eventually, I'm sure you and/or his friend will ... (read in full...)
I'm 14 and pregnant and want to keep the baby
Q. hi my name is desiree and i stress every day its so much drama that go on in my life i been through alot and im having a baby and i no im kinda young but i think i can handle it because i carry myself as a young ladie dont get into no more drama and ...
A. 18 March 2010: If you want to keep the baby, then keep it. However, it's not as easy as you think it is, there's A LOT more to it than falling into drama that comes with parenthood. And yes, please stay in school because it's called peer pressure and I won't get ... (read in full...)
My ex wants to talk, I don't. How do I gently tell him no?
Q. Hi, My exboyfriend contacted me last week (through email) and asked me to get together personally so we can talk. We broke up three years ago. Then I would've been very interested in talking to him, not now. There were things about the past I...
A. 18 March 2010: If he kind of deserves it, I say go for it. Be blunt, especially if he acted like a total ass in the past. I don't think it's completely hurtful, it's simple and straight to the point and he can't really get anywhere with it. If he tries to ... (read in full...)
Does my boyfriend's Dad have a crush on me?
Q. Hello, I've been with my boyfriend for a while now and we both love each other deeply. I've not noticed this much but lately it's been bothering me a little more than it should. I think my boyfriend's Dad has a crush on me. When both m...
A. 17 March 2010: I think you may have a better indication than we do. From what you say, it just sounds like he's teasing his son, not to impress you, but because that's what guys do to each other espeically when their girlfriend is around. If you two are lying in ... (read in full...)
I love him even though he has a girlfriend.
Q. i have a friend, weve dated before but now he has a new girlfriend. i like him again a lot more than i ever did. now were best friends and really close intamitely, but he says he loves his girlfriend and won't break up with her. he does really like ...
A. 17 March 2010: If he liked you the same way that you like him then he'd be with you and not his girlfriend. You're moving in a couple weeks and a long distance relationship between you two probably won't work out being that you two probably don't get have a means ... (read in full...)
3 weeks till I give birth is it normal for my urine to smell almost like bleach?
Q. i have three weeks left before i give birth and am just wondering if it is normal for my urine to smell.for the last two days i have noticed that it smells something like bleach a really strong and not a very nice smell is this something to worry ...
A. 17 March 2010: Google it, it sounds like it's pretty common. There's a lot of women that are asking about their urine smelling like ammonia or chlorine. I didn't really read them, but maybe you can find your answers there. Of course there's always the ... (read in full...)
Is it legal for cousins to have a baby together?
Q. Is it illeagal to have a babby with your first cousin in the united states?...
A. 17 March 2010: Depends on your state, in most states, I believe so. ... (read in full...)
How would you take this compliment?
Q. OK I gave this lady I like a compliment in a round about way here is the way it happened. I feel this lady is attracted to me but I was walking with her co-worker and she was communicating with her back and forth while we were walking together...
A. 17 March 2010: I think that she would have gotten it and she would have been happy to hear you make a comment like that...but it's still very indirect, I wouldn't have thought that you had any interest in me with a comment like that. Then again, I'm pretty ... (read in full...)
Why doesn't he make a move?
Q. Hey all. So I'm not sure if this guy in my class likes me or if he does this with every girl... But he's 25 and he's a little quiet/shy. Around his friends he isn't (I know this because I'm really good friends with his good friend). So ever since I ...
A. 17 March 2010: As much as guys try to portray themselves as macho and whatnot, they're really afraid to ask girls out most of the time. I think usually you know if a guy is interested, so if you feel he is but is afraid, then ask him out or something. He may be ... (read in full...)
Are we having an affair?
Q. This man I work with is very sexy to me. We are both married so everything is off limits. We became cool and we talk about our sex life which is boring on both parts. My husband doesn't do some things I like and vice versa on his end. Anyway, I ...
A. 17 March 2010: If you have to ask this question, then you have your answer. If that's not good enough for you, yes, you're having an affair. Affairs don't necessarily have to be physical.... (read in full...)
Girls is it confidence, appearance, attitude; what?
Q. Girls: does confidence matter more if the guy is generally seen as "unattractive"? I have good days where i'm super cocky, other days where i'm almost shy. As confident as I get and as much time as i spend on my appearance and personality, I get ...
A. 17 March 2010: If a guy is seen as unattractive, then yes, he needs confidence and personality. Now, don't get cocky confused with confidence. Almost all women DO NOT like a cocky guy. If you're cocky, it will backfire. You'll come across as an ass, then ... (read in full...)
I want to convince her that I've changed
Q. I want to know if there is anything I can do now to repair or recover my relationship. My girlfriend of 7 months broke up with me 2 months ago and I am completely devastated. She had tried to tell me several times that I wasn't giving her what she ...
A. 17 March 2010: Wow, it's really sad to see that even when men are your age they still don't get it. Yes! She wants your attention and yes, if you want her, you need to fight for her; otherwise, she'll figure you don't give a crap about her still just like how ... (read in full...)
I love my mistress but I feel bad for leaving my wife and kids
Q. I am 35 years old, married for 9 years with 3 kids relatively young - 7 and twins of 4 years old. I met a girl 4 years ago (Kelly) but we really started to see each other more often like twice a week over the past 4 months, before it was once a mo...
A. 17 March 2010: Maybe you don't love your wife, and no, you shouldn't stay with her if you don't love her. It's not fair to her and say you did decide to divorce her after the kids had grown, it's still hurtful to them. I know if my husband didn't really love me ... (read in full...)
Is it harmless or should I be moving on?
Q. My boyfriend of several years is looking at online dating sites and "classified ads." I have caught him emailing some of the girls and when I confront him he says he is "just looking" and would never do anything. Is it harmless or should I be ...
A. 17 March 2010: Before I ask if you're crazy, I'm guessing you just want to make sure that you're not crazy for thinking that it's completely messed up that he's looking at these sites AND writing some of the girls. Well it is. He's looking to move on, and it ... (read in full...)
After how many dates is it ok to have sex?
Q. So I met this guy (We'll call him Mike) in September. It took us a while to finally get together, but in January we went on our first date. In February, Mike and I went on two dates (the second of which, we kissed for the first time and ultimately ...
A. 17 March 2010: It's true, I've known some men to consider oral sex more "intimate" than actually having sex. I think you should have sex with him when you're ready. It's said that you should wait at least a month or longer until you can't anymore. I think you ... (read in full...)
Should I keep the dog I'm allergic to or risk losing my boyfriend?
Q. I am in a moral dilema but it is affecting my health and I don't know the best way to handle this. I have been in a relationship for some time now and three years ago I acquired a dog through some emotional blackmail from my daughters and my b...
A. 17 March 2010: I don't see what the big deal is especially if you know the dog is going to a good home. I got a dog the first time I moved out and when I moved back in with my parents he has the company of their dog and he gets the attention he needs. I miss him ... (read in full...)
He says premarital sex is wrong and we need to wait...is he gay??
Q. Hello. I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years. I have been telling myself he is just a late bloomer and inexperienced. He had sex for the first time in college and then found religion. He is a born again christian and since then he says ...
A. 16 March 2010: Okay, if the shoe was on the other foot, and you wanted to wait until marriage to get married, wouldn't you think it's quite offensive for someone to assume that you're gay? It's okay for women to want to wait but not men and you think it's okay to ... (read in full...)
Could I still be pregnant or am I immediately protected because of the pill?
Q. I started the combined pill on the 2nd day of my period last wednesday. I took it Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday at exactly the same time of 7:30. On saturday nite i had sex without a condom with my boyfriend and he came inside me could i ...
A. 16 March 2010: You need to take it for a month before you're protected, you're supposed to use a backup method the first 30-days. Also, why did you start the second day of your period? You either start on day 1 of your period or Sunday start. They put ... (read in full...)
Could this be implantation bleeding?
Q. Hello everyone, is it normal to bleed after a week ur period was done? Before the period i was really worried that i wasnt going to get it because i had sex (protected though) 2 -3 weeks before my usual period, but then i did have it. and i was ...
A. 15 March 2010: Probably...but that's probably a better question for your doctor.... (read in full...)
I have no idea what's going on in her head..need advice!
Q. Last month my ex called to say that we were over and she needed a break from us, we'd been going out for 2 1/2 years,we'd been arguing a lot over the last few months,and I guess she'd just had enough. taking a step back from us has made me see some ...
A. 14 March 2010: I agree that I think she still likes you; however, it sounds like the way your relationship was before will only go back to the way it was before. If you were depressed in the relationship before and now you're happy, not depressed, and not ... (read in full...)
Could this be implantation bleeding?
Q. Hello everyone, is it normal to bleed after a week ur period was done? Before the period i was really worried that i wasnt going to get it because i had sex (protected though) 2 -3 weeks before my usual period, but then i did have it. and i was ...
A. 14 March 2010: Nah, don't think you're pregnant. Sounds like you're probably just having an irregular period. Even if you always have a normal one, you can be irregular every so often. I was always normal until about 23 and I completely skipped a period and ... (read in full...)
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