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*unty BimBim

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How should you say that you're rich, on Tinder?

Q.   I'm not rich, but if a guy were rich, what would be the best way for him to say that he's (seriously) rich on something like Tinder?...

A.   19 February 2017: Rich guys don't need tinder ... if a rich guy wants to attract women he just goes to the places where women who want to attract rich guys hang out. ... (read in full...)

How can I figure out what job suits me? Any tips on finding the perfect job?

Q.   I work in a prestigious corporate role and I absolutely hate it. I feel like my life revolves around my job and I'm so dependent on it (money) that everyday just feels robotic. I went to school undergrad and grad and now I have a corporate role as ...

A.   19 February 2017: Start looking for something to feel passionate about, not to replace your job at this stage but something that rings your bell so hard you can't wait to finish your work each day to get at it! It could be an activity where you set personal... (read in full...)

How do I cope with a gambling addicted boyfriend?

Q.   How do I cope with a gambling addicted boyfriend? My partner of 2 years started gambling a lot about 2/3 months into the relationship. Ive tried my hardest to support and understand this problem ive offered to go to counciling with him or pointed ...

A.   19 February 2017: Regardless the form of gambling your boyfriend is addicted to he is never going to win .... the will always be the next big thing to put his money on, however large or small that amount of money is. You are not his mother, treating him like a n... (read in full...)

How do I respond when friends query me on this? She uses a picture of herself with my BF as her profile picture on social media

Q.   Hi Everyone, I could use some advice. I am currently contemplating getting back into a relationship with my boyfriend of 7 years. We split for 3 years, and he began dating someone else. They recently had a child together, but are not in a relatio...

A.   17 February 2017: Is it possible your ex hasn't told her yet that they are not in a relationship, I only ask because you do say they were dating and have recently had a child. I am also wondering what reason he has given to her to take it down, after all she and ... (read in full...)

My husband wants me to give his friend a hand job!

Q.   my husband has been trying to talk me into giving his best friend a mercy hand job , Because his wife has some kind of a medical problem ? His friend has been so sad ever since his wife has cut him off . I am seriously considering doing it for him ...

A.   17 February 2017: That's nice Donna, but there is no reason why your husband cant give the friend a hand job or the friend give himself a hand job or even go buy one .... if you prefer to think giving sexual favours to somebody who isn't your husband or partner is a ... (read in full...)

My husband wants me to give his friend a hand job!

Q.   my husband has been trying to talk me into giving his best friend a mercy hand job , Because his wife has some kind of a medical problem ? His friend has been so sad ever since his wife has cut him off . I am seriously considering doing it for him ...

A.   16 February 2017: Doing it with his permission .... WTF! Do it WITHOUT his permission, and as SVC says, if you do decide to have sex or give sexual favours to his friend it will be strictly between you and the friend, and not discussed with him as to when, how, ... (read in full...)

She has helped me a lot through some difficult times. Would it be acceptable to send her flowers as a thank you?

Q.   I have a female friend who I have known since I was 4, she is the same age as me and although we lost contact for a number of years. We are back in contact. Whenever I had problems she always knew what to say and since being back in touch she has...

A.   15 February 2017: If your intent was romantic in nature why didn't you put your name on them? I don't understand your thought processes ... was she supposed to realise immediately they were from YOU and fall into your arms or what? Tell her NOW that you were the... (read in full...)

My husband wants me to give his friend a hand job!

Q.   my husband has been trying to talk me into giving his best friend a mercy hand job , Because his wife has some kind of a medical problem ? His friend has been so sad ever since his wife has cut him off . I am seriously considering doing it for him ...

A.   15 February 2017: Hell No! Is that your role in life, provider of sexual favours? If you husband feels his friend needs a "mercy" hand job then he can give it to him. If his friend doesn't want a hand job from your husband he can take care of it himself, as he pr... (read in full...)

My LDR is not motivated to meet in real life.

Q.   I've been dating my LDR boyfriend for over 2 years and we haven' met yet. He never wants to pinpoint a meeting date and acts unconfortable when I try to. He says he wants to improve himself first so when we meet he makes the best impression on me. ...

A.   14 February 2017: Thanks for the update OP, he might not be stringing you along, maybe he doesn't realise how long its been. I still think you need to ask him for a timeline, and if he cant give you a definite date its not worth hanging around waiting for him. ... (read in full...)

My LDR is not motivated to meet in real life.

Q.   I've been dating my LDR boyfriend for over 2 years and we haven' met yet. He never wants to pinpoint a meeting date and acts unconfortable when I try to. He says he wants to improve himself first so when we meet he makes the best impression on me. ...

A.   14 February 2017: What sort of improvements is he wanting to make? Is he so morbidly obese they will need to cut him out of his room? Is he unemployed? Is he saving up for much needed dental work? Or a toupee? Ask him what improvements he is wanting to make and... (read in full...)

Boyfriend's grandmother died, should I go to the funeral?

Q.   My boyfriend of 2 years grandma recently passed away. He's asking me to go to a funeral with him to comefort him. I told him I would feel out of place and not comefortable because I never really knew his grandma or other relatives besides his ...

A.   14 February 2017: Funerals are for the living. You boyfriend wants you there for support, accept his invitation and support him ... This is not just about saying goodbye to Granny, its also a statement (he may not realise it) on your boyfriend's part that you... (read in full...)

How can I get my crush to notice me?

Q.   There's a guy I'm interested in but I just can't seem to get him to notice me. I try to talking to him, flirting, touching, writing him some steamy notes, but he just won't respond. I asked him to our school Valentine's day dance and he turned me ...

A.   13 February 2017: Oh my gosh Girl! He is not interested, doesn't the fact he even curses you tell you that, why is that not sinking in? You need to stop your crazy pursuing, he is NOT INTERESTED! Who cares if he doesn't have a girlfriend, its not against the ... (read in full...)

He doesn't have the same feelings as I have for him from the beginning until the end

Q.   My aunt introduced me to her husband's nephew 9mos.ago,he is a 4yr divorced man with 2kids,I also have a 13yr old son that's why get along so well. We were talking,messaging online for 8 mos until we decided to meet in Barcelona last week,he flew ...

A.   12 February 2017: Don't remain friends, why would you when you are hurting so much over this. If he is no longer interested in a relationship block his number, delete him from your phone and move forward. If at some stage in the future you happen to be in the same... (read in full...)

A year after breaking it off with me he wants my phone number, should I give it to him?

Q.   So I have a question I'd like some help with. I'm really confused as to whether I should get back with my ex. I was with my ex for 9 years 15-24. There were no issues everything was great almost perfect but nothing is perfect I guess. I loved h...

A.   12 February 2017: Are you planning on eventually settling down and having children? Are you aware of the changes you might see in your body during and after pregnancy ... what if your body doesn't bounce right back to pre pregnancy shape and size? Will he decid... (read in full...)

Friend uploaded video of me saying things when drunk. She won't take it down but I'm worried

Q.   My friend uploaded a video of us playing drinking games when we were at hers. In it, I am slightly tipsy (as we all are) and I can be heard saying rather inappropriate things which I feel could implicate my future. I've told her I'm worried abo...

A.   12 February 2017: Get your parents to write a formal letter requesting the video be removed immediately or they will be seeking legal advise from their lawyers. (Friends of mine did this when their daughter had something similar happen). Then accept she is not y... (read in full...)

How do I deal with a guy who is insecure that I had sexual experiences before him?

Q.   How do I deal with a guy who is insecure that I had sexual experiences before him? Is that even normal for a guy to feel? Early in our relationship, he was disappointed that I wasn't a virgin. Then he was weirded out when he found out that he wasn't ...

A.   12 February 2017: Should you reassure him and tread lightly? Hell no! If the little pudding's little feelies are going to get hurt this often I'd be considering if he was worth the effort! Give him one last chance ... tell him you had sex before you met him, and... (read in full...)

I feel miserable and our relationship lacks excitement!

Q.   Hi I've been with my fiance for 3 years now the problem is it feels like we've been together forever we never go anywhere together birthdays Christmas,s valentines day all get forgotten about by him he has a very easy job he works Monday/Friday ...

A.   11 February 2017: So what exactly are you getting from this relationship, beside sex maybe once every two weeks? This about your answer very carefully do you feel loved and nurtured? do you feel cherished? does he tell you often he loves you? how far down h... (read in full...)

I think the married co-worker I've been flirting with is just looking for a fling, but I can't avoid him because we work together. What do I do?

Q.   Hi. I have recently started a part time job which i love. Everyone is so lovely but I have found myself flirting with this guy. We text a lot and he says very flattering things but he is due to be married in a few weeks. He has two children with ...

A.   11 February 2017: True, if you work together you can't avoid him BUT you can start acting more professionally, you know, like work colleagues. However you CAN block him, stop texting him, stop thinking about him in a flirty manner, if you are meeting him outside ... (read in full...)

It shouldn't be this difficult only 6 weeks into a relationship

Q.   recently started a new relationship we've been together now around 6 weeks. he's 40 I'm 32 and we both work together. we've known each other for around 6 years now but we were always both in different relationships until recently. so at the ...

A.   11 February 2017: You may need to offload the baggage from the old relationship before you attempt a new relationship. From your submission it would seem you didn't give yourself enough time to sit and reflect and even recover from your breakup .... maybe pull back ... (read in full...)

Is It Time To Ditch My Toxic Friend?

Q.   I've only known her for a few months, at the start she was OK but she has become nasty. She is always oneupping me in conversation. For example if I make a casual remark about how I like a dress or something, she'll be like "Oh that dress isn't for ...

A.   11 February 2017: Who needs this sort of crap in our lives ..... There is no law saying you have to invite people when you are going out with other people, she can be as passive aggressive as she likes, just stop letting it affect you. There is no need for a bi... (read in full...)

I need help to deal with new found info about wife's past. What should I do?

Q.   My wife and I have been married for five years and have two kids. I have never asked anything about her past all I knew is she wasn't a virgin when we met. This past summer we were at a pool party and one of my best friend's from school was ther...

A.   10 February 2017: I am with jls022 .... small communities DO know everything saucy almost before those incidents happen, there was an incident in my small town some 45 years ago and people still ask me about it, getting all the details wrong even if some small parts ... (read in full...)

Do women ever regret dumping a nice guy for a jerk?

Q.   my question is do women, ever look back an wonder? they have been in a relationship for a while and the guy isn't very nice to them, not a gentleman or romantic, before him they were seeing a guy who was, but he wasn't a challenge,they thought he ...

A.   9 February 2017: I know lots of guys I would describe as nice, who are married, usually to nice women, have children, or nice single guys who are never short of a female partner when they want to go to a dance, or show, or need a partner for a wedding etc. ... (read in full...)

Is this male theory correct? Do woman wear matching black bra and panties when having sex is intended?

Q.   Is there any truth to the theory that women wear black when they are planning to have sex with someone and also if you're going to have sex you wear matching bra and panties?...

A.   9 February 2017: Lots of women prefer the feel of nice undies against their skin and their underwear choices are made for that reason ... I always wear black because it is easier to launder and keep clean, its black regardless if I am cleaning the bathroom or going ... (read in full...)

How can I encourage him to consider discussing with me, and choosing a baby boy's name with me, where we both agree together on the name?

Q.   My husband and I don't live together because we don't have jobs. I live with my mother and she is supporting me financially for the moment. She will also be getting a house for my bf and us to live in as well. I see my bf once a month, we live a...

A.   9 February 2017: Honeypie is correct, he has no more right to name the child than the man on the moon, regardless of gender. I like her idea of how to choose a name you both like .... that being said, is the father of the baby your husband or boyfriend? I ask this ... (read in full...)

We're engaged but I don't see a future

Q.   Hi lately I feel like my relationship has no future we recently got engaged but he never wants to get married we have 1 child and he wants no more he never wants to buy a house together so I cannot see much of a future with this man I have always ...

A.   6 February 2017: If you honestly feel you will not have a "decent" future with him then you need to reconsider the relationship. Why settle for something less? You still have around (on average) fifty years on this earth, do you really want to spend those years ... (read in full...)

What if the tables were turned? Am I being a numpty for agreeing to her terms?

Q.   Hey just like to ask if i've been a bit of a numpty. I'm not allowed a facebook nor messenger not sure why but to make her happy i said ill not make a facebook. She has both and lots of people added like people she works with and even people she s...

A.   5 February 2017: ohhh, who says you can't have facebook?? Your mummy? The great almighty? You already know the answer, its right there in your last sentence. Whats good for the goose is sauce for the gander. If you want facebook then get it. If your girlfrie... (read in full...)

My partner doesn't do any parenting with our two year old.

Q.   Hi I've got a 2 year old son with my partner of 4 years we live together but we had a disagreement yesterday over something stupid to which he replied he goes to work for 8 hours a day the disagreement was because I asked him to wipe his hands and ...

A.   4 February 2017: Questions about non involved parents, usually the Dad's, who live in the same house as their partner/spouses and children but are not involved in the parenting of the kids always grieve me. Are these men really so dense they don't realise their de... (read in full...)

I've tried talking about our problems but he doesn't listen ... what can I do?

Q.   Hiya me and my boyfriend are both 30 we've been together for 4 years we have a 1 yr old daughter together the problem is ever since we got together we don't do anything together I've talked to him about it and we planned a date night once a month ...

A.   3 February 2017: What is in this relationship for you and your daughter? Consider your options ... does your 1 year old have an engaged Dad who shares her care, baths her, reads to her, puts her to bed, takes her for a walk or to visit his mother her granny? ... (read in full...)

My husband can't see the problems with his ex wife ...

Q.   My husband and his ex have not spoken in years because of all the trouble she caused at the beginning of our relationship. She called begging him to come sleep with her, she kept asking to come over claiming she needed closure (she was the one who ...

A.   2 February 2017: I am sorry about the confusion OP ... I agree with Honeypie's advise that you should see your doctor about your PPD and also ask family for help if you are not getting enough sleep. That being said I still feel you should line up your ducks i... (read in full...)

My husband can't see the problems with his ex wife ...

Q.   My husband and his ex have not spoken in years because of all the trouble she caused at the beginning of our relationship. She called begging him to come sleep with her, she kept asking to come over claiming she needed closure (she was the one who ...

A.   1 February 2017: Ask your husband if he meant it when he said at your wedding "til death do us part" .... ask him if your two babies and your health and peace of mind really are expected to come AFTER his statement of only death parting him and his ex wife? ... (read in full...)

Is he flirting or is it just banter?

Q.   Okay so there was a point I really fancied this guy but then he gave the impression he was straight He recently snap shot two pics I took and drew a penis on them to make it look like I was sucking dick.... then text" bravo you don't like (the ...

A.   31 January 2017: I'm with the previous Aunt, its just tacky and really unfunny .... I am not picking up any flirting here, and seems more like the actions of a bully whose idea of fun is to hurt people and then say "oh, I was only joking" Proceed with caution.... (read in full...)

I don't want to have a relationship with him but I'd like him as a friend.

Q.   Me and my ex (who i've known my entire life) split up a year ago because he started to treat me bad and was showing signs of unfaithfulness. However, a year on me and him were supposedly over the relationship and he requested that we be friends. We ...

A.   29 January 2017: To answer your question, is this a good idea, no, it isn't. He doesn't want you for a friend, he wants to manipulate you into being a convenient hole for him to stick his penis in ... he has no emotional attachment to you, why would you want to ... (read in full...)

He is much older but I want to have sex with him

Q.   I knew a guy at work. I'm 22 he is 41. A very sexy man. Do u think he will have something with me after sex. We decided to be friends with benefits. He is in a relationship with a 31 years old . We planned to have sex this weekend. Do you think is ...

A.   28 January 2017: He is in a relationship, all he wants from you is sex. If he was interested in more with you then he wouldn't already have a partner. You are setting yourself up for a whole lot of heartache, if this gets out in the workplace who do you think pe... (read in full...)

I know we can solve any problems but he just acts distant!

Q.   Hi I really need some male opinion on this, I was friends with this guy 3 years ago we started having sex without admitting that we were in a relationship which was what we both wanted at that time ( though it seemed like we had feelings for each...

A.   28 January 2017: You say that you know for sure any problems can be solved, but I don't think the main problem can, because you are looking for a relationship and he simply wants to have sex with you ... any problems you feel may still exist don't bother him because ... (read in full...)

Could my bf's avoidance of my compliments suggest he is cheating?

Q.   I have been suspecting my bf has been unfaithful recently. Just sense a change. When having a text conversation this evening, I went on about how lucky I am to have him. What a good guy he is and how I am glad he is not like other men. I sai...

A.   28 January 2017: When we are going to unload to somebody else with the expectation of a certain response we should really pre warn them its going to happen, for example, there was your chappie, beavering away at some research, when, out of the blue you contact him ... (read in full...)

How come I am not heartbroken?

Q.   I had a huge crush on a girl for about 5 years. I went to school with her in high school, but now that I'm out I haven't spoken to her in person just over text. Recently I found out she just got a boyfriend, at first I thought I'd be all heart ...

A.   28 January 2017: She was a crush, if you were wanting something more than to admire her from afar you would have done more than talk over text since school ended. I think your heart had already acknowledged there was nothing there, you just needed your head to ... (read in full...)

I like him and enjoy his flirting. But what should I do? Because I think he has a Gf already

Q.   There's this guy I'm talking too. The problem is, I think he has a girlfriend.. We've been speaking a while and a few months ago, he told me that he can't take things forward with me because he has someone. I respected that and we remained to j...

A.   28 January 2017: The guy told you a few months ago he "had someone." Your friend has snooped on his facebook and confirmed he is in a relationship. So you stopped talking to him for a few days, or as long as it took for you to decide his already having a girlfrie... (read in full...)

He gave me deadline to talk to my ex and when things didn't work out he ended things with me

Q.   I need help to figure out who is the wrong one here. I'm 39 divorced and have a 10 years old daughter. My relationship with my ex is peaceful and it's just because we have a child together. I started dating for the first time, 3 years after divorce, ...

A.   27 January 2017: Oh, WOW, you have dodged a bullet, this new guy of yours who the hell does he think he is to dictate the relationship between you and your child's other parent ... ESPECIALLY as it has been amicable up until now. I was already in a grumpy mood bef... (read in full...)

Having problems with my Aunt. Should I tell my dad about this?

Q.   i've been posting several questions and for some reason i've been having endless number of dilemmas... At first i didnt know how to ask my parents for permission for a day out to celebrate my birthday and chinese new year (CNY). Eventually i a...

A.   26 January 2017: If your aunt is, like her friends, in her 60s and you are still in your early teens (16 or 17) it is only natural for the two of you to fail to understand where the other is coming from. However, I must say this, for an older woman of that age ... (read in full...)

Has anyone else dealt with something like this? My first serious girlfriend has since come out as a lesbian.

Q.   I was a little bit of a late bloomer but in college I finally met a really amazing girl who became my first serious girlfriend and by that I mean that she was all my firsts: first kiss, first love, first sexual encounter. She had been with one...

A.   26 January 2017: I doubt very much you had anything to do with your first girlfriend coming out as a lesbian. I've got family members who started out in heterosexual relationships, only to find that wasn't who they were ... one even married, the big white dress and ... (read in full...)

She has helped me a lot through some difficult times. Would it be acceptable to send her flowers as a thank you?

Q.   I have a female friend who I have known since I was 4, she is the same age as me and although we lost contact for a number of years. We are back in contact. Whenever I had problems she always knew what to say and since being back in touch she has...

A.   24 January 2017: What are you wanting here? If you want to say "thankyou" then send the flowers now .... If you want to say "I am romantically interested in your" then send flowers on Valentines Day, however, please be aware that if she is NOT romatica... (read in full...)

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