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*unty BimBim

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Is this woman trying to break up our marriage? She claims my husband cheated with her

Q.   My husband and i have been married for 8 years with 3 Kids and pregnant at the moment. I have never caught him cheating. But my Brother exgirlfriend told my Brother that she went out my husband and they had sex. Then my husband gave her money. When ...

A.   22 July 2017: It all sounds a bit suspicious, what with losing numbers and changing names .... what did your brother think about her accusations? I think, unless you have other reason to think your husband has cheated, that you need to accept that he does not... (read in full...)

Advice please on my crush on a policeman

Q.   I am 17 year old young woman! I have a strong attraction to a local cop, because he responded to a home invasion when i was all alone one summer.. I fell for him because he was such a quick responder, like 5 mins. He was so sweet, very experienced. ...

A.   22 July 2017: You are in love with the idea of a heroic policeman, this policeman did the right thing sending you to the hospital. I think it would be very beneficial for you to seek some professional advise on your fixation, either from a doctor or a counsell... (read in full...)

I'm ready to walk, am I just being used as a babysitter?

Q.   hey, my partner sits on her phone all day does the odd chore round the house i mean when one of the babies does a dirty nappy she doesnt get down to cleaning it up she tells me babies pood so i end up doing it and been like that for years im a stay ...

A.   20 July 2017: You are NOT BABYSITTING you are parenting your children. What other income is there for the family besides your partner's earnings from the pub? Is there a reason why you are not looking for a part time job? Are you totally supported by your par... (read in full...)

She makes up things I've said - then criticises me

Q.   Hey guys, Need some advice here or just a way to avoid the unnecessary arguments altogether. In short, my girlfriend is continuously saying I've said things I've never said. It's driving me mad because if I defend myself about these things...

A.   19 July 2017: Girlfriend as in friend who is a girl, or a woman you are in a relationship with? Blunt answer is your girlfriend is either nuts or trying to gaslight you, either way its time to re-evaluate the relationship. https://www.psyc... (read in full...)

How do I help my boyfriend sort himself out?

Q.   My boyfriend had a really bad relationship with this girl before me and left him with some mental scars and we were totally fine until he got drunk and texted some random girl stupid stuff but they weren't that bad. Now he's apologised loads and I ...

A.   19 July 2017: First up you can't help him, that's his job and exactly what is it you want to help him with? His depression? Has he been diagnosed or is he just using it as an excuse for his bad behaviour. If he is depressed the best thing for him to do is ... (read in full...)

8 years of trust,broken! Can we make it back?

Q.   Hi all thanks for your help first of all I have a horrible problem I need help with. Sorry about the lengh. I went on a holiday with 4 of my friends one of them is my boyfriends brothers girlfriend Side note: I've been with my bf 8 years been ...

A.   18 July 2017: Make a booking for the lie detector test, use his credit card to pay for it upfront. Take the test and when the results come back shove them up his left nostril, telling him thanks for nothing and then dump his sorry arse. ... (read in full...)

The difference , between , I DO LOVE YOU, YOU KNOW . compared to I LOVE YOU .

Q.   My ex girl friend , said to me now and again , I do love you, you know . Is she trying to say that she treated me badly ? I used to say to her I love you , I,m wondering what the meaning behind her ...

A.   18 July 2017: no, I would read that as her believing you doubted her love for you. ... (read in full...)

I can't deal with his passive aggressive behavior when I don't want sex

Q.   I met a guy, who is now my boyfriend, 3 months ago. He has made it clear he is really into me. I wasn't sure if I was atttacted to him enough, but he was lovely to me and we had a lot in common, so I went with it. I was very happy to fiND we worked ...

A.   18 July 2017: you print your final paragraph out and practice saying it out loud ... then you find some neutral place, not his house, and you sit him down, make sure he is looking at your eyes so it sinks in and you tell him that. If he doesn't listen, or refus... (read in full...)

Is there anything in this astrology thing?

Q.   Do any aunts and uncle believe in fortune teller? Are there any experience from aunts and uncle here? As a chinese, many of us believe in fortune teller and physic reading. But i was raised in an atheist family and not a believer of mystical thin...

A.   16 July 2017: I am with Miss Cupid, I believe there are people who are very intuitive and are able to .... I don't know, pick up vibrations about others might be a way to describe it. I also KNOW there are a lot of charlatans who will, in exchange for money, t... (read in full...)

He's back with her and I'm hurting. What can I do?

Q.   They were together for 2 years and they haven't really had a no contact period. Well, she stopped talking to him for two months and when she hit him up when she visited town he lashed out at her and said "You haven't talked to me in two months! What ...

A.   16 July 2017: There is nothing here for you, apart from a whole lot of heartache and unrequited love. Are you a rebound? I don't think so, hurtful as it may sound I think you are just some chick he hangs out with when his girlfriend is not in town. The b... (read in full...)

Things were good until his ex' got involved

Q.   I met a guy online in January who is a really great guy. He's a bit older than me but that doesn't bother me. He's 37,I'm 27. We spoke for about 3 weeks before we met for real. We got on instantly and after a few weeks, we began spending more and ...

A.   16 July 2017: What the dickens Girl! The man is a total droob and you should be running away as fast as you can! His ex has him by the short and curlies, she is obviously more important to him than you ever will be, and by the sounds of it there is not a lot of... (read in full...)

I work while my husband stays home, he goes on vacation but I cant!

Q.   A little over a year ago my husband left hos job because it was too stressful and demanding and became a househusband. I own our house, so no mortgage and extra espenses, and although our lifestyle has changed a bit- meaning that we try and save ...

A.   6 July 2017: Lets recap ..... your husband found his job too stressful so he quit and now stays home and looks after things on the domestic front. You own the house and support your husband financially. You needed expensive work done on your teeth so your pa... (read in full...)

He's asking about people I've slept within the past 2 years!

Q.   I've recently got into a relationship with a guy i've been seeing on and off for a long time. We've only been together a couple of months officially but he's began to ask about people i've slept with over the past two years. He's quite insecure as ...

A.   6 July 2017: None of his business who you have slept with in the past before you and he became an item, none at all. I would tell him his asking for these details makes you very uncomfortable. I'm with Honeypie when she says being in a LDR with an insecure... (read in full...)

Who do I help, the one who relies on me or myself?

Q.   I have a strained relationship with my girlfriend of five years. There's a lot of love and care there. She'll shower me with it, thank me and bless me. She has me on a pedestal and I shelter her from life. There's a lot of love but I feel trapped. ...

A.   6 July 2017: The best way to help her would be to say "I'm sorry, I can't help you this month, all my ready cash has been allocated" Try it and see. You know your actions over the past years haven't really helped so here is a chance to try something differen... (read in full...)

Went out with a colleague but things took a downward turn. He's not interested anymore and I feel stuck blaming myself. What should I do?

Q.   So me and my colleague started to like each other so we exchanged numbers. I wasn't looking for anything serious because of the age difference but I was sexually attracted to him, and it appeared mutual. We were texting and we decided to go out ...

A.   4 July 2017: You mentioned an age difference .... how much older than you is he, this could have a HUGE bearing how some of us would answer your question, for example if the age gap is just a few years and you are both still quite young his motivations would be ... (read in full...)

I don't want to be replaced by a vibrator .... again!

Q.   I have a much higher sex drive than my wife. About 10 years ago I bought a vibrator for her. Everything was great and we used it a lot together when we had sex, and sex happened more frequently. After a while, she lost almost all interest in havi...

A.   2 July 2017: Maybe your wife didn't want to be replaced with porn and your masturbation habits. Sounds to me you have a severe case of double standards, its okay for you to have outside stimulation but not her.... (read in full...)

What is the correct protocol for children that don't live at home and being invited out with us?

Q.   I have a question for other blended families, I have two kids ages 12 and 7 and my fiance has two kids 22 and 18. The 22 and 18 year old live with their boyfriends and my children live with me and my fiance. Here is the question. When planning...

A.   2 July 2017: Your followup regarding your fiancé's daughter's expectations rang some bells for me. Is your fiancé still unemployed with you picking up the tab for most expenses? http:... (read in full...)

What is the correct protocol for children that don't live at home and being invited out with us?

Q.   I have a question for other blended families, I have two kids ages 12 and 7 and my fiance has two kids 22 and 18. The 22 and 18 year old live with their boyfriends and my children live with me and my fiance. Here is the question. When planning...

A.   1 July 2017: His kids are adults, living in adult relationships, so nooooo you don't have to invite them to join you every time you do something with their father. Who pays when you go out, you or him? Or do you share the costs? Maybe his kids think an... (read in full...)

Am I foolish to forgive my girlfriend for cheating?

Q.   In January I found out that I'd been offered a promotion at work. A fantastic opportunity to change my life, but it involved 6 months living abroad. My girlfriend of 4 years didn't want me to go initially, but after talking things through she agreed ...

A.   29 June 2017: Your former best friend needs to know that you are aware of his dirty deeds! If your girlfriend is serious about trying to repair the damage done he needs to know that he is no longer part of your circle of friends. Let him know that you wont be ... (read in full...)

I'm taking care of an ill family member. I don't know how to stay calm, parents won't help

Q.   I am caring for a family member who is here alone - she has fallen ill and I am the sole provider. I count the pennies because everything goes to paying for her to get better- my parents own to homes and in this moment of need they could help but I ...

A.   29 June 2017: You seem to have kept your letter deliberately vague, whether to protect yourself or you family member is unclear. Your parents might be all you describe, but they don't have crystal balls, are they aware of the family member's situation? Has any... (read in full...)

Should I ask her now?

Q.   Hi I'm not sure where to start as this is a huge story, I will try to keep this as short and informative as possible. I'm here because I struggle to vocalise my emotions with those closest to me. I'm 27 years old I was with my ex for 9 years (16-...

A.   29 June 2017: Ask her on a date, but remember the girl you dated from age 16 to 25 is gone, and the woman who stands in her place has since lived a vast array of experiences including working and living in a different country. If you do ask her out and she says... (read in full...)

Is my son over-reacting?

Q.   My son is 20 and my older son 27. They started college around the same time. My oldest is going to a for-profit school for culinary arts; meanwhile my youngest is attending a community college on a full pell grant.. my oldest needs the car to attend ...

A.   21 June 2017: Is your youngest son REALLY expected to sacrifice his grades for his family? Your eldest son uses the car ... would it be possible for him to catch a bus and you use the car? You don't mention your eldest son works, only that he needs your car... (read in full...)

Is my husband up to no good behind my back with another woman on Facebook?

Q.   Hello. I might sound like another jealous, insecure and paranoid wife with social media related relationship issues but here goes... I am a late bloomer on Facebook. I just started about 6 months ago. My husband of 3 years has had Facebook for 7 y...

A.   17 June 2017: I am an older woman who uses facebook daily :-) The stuff that appears in my news feed depends on what pages I have looked at, what I am more likely to be reading, what links I usually click on, and also on what posts and pictures I like and comm... (read in full...)

My partner for 3 years loves me. Would it be wrong to take a chance with another man who I've loved for 27 years?

Q.   Dear Cupid, I have recently been contacted by the man I've been in love with for 27 years. There are songs I couldn't listen to, our anniversary date that I still hold dear to my heart. I hadn't laid eyes on him in 18 years and that one time wa...

A.   8 June 2017: awwww, the poor little love wants a divorce from the woman he has been with for 22 years .... but before he does that he wants to make sure he has his next woman (wife?) lined up. WOMAN OPEN YOUR EYES! Where was he for the past 22 years, it certa... (read in full...)

Living together is making me broke

Q.   My question is about sharing expenses as a couple. I've been with my girlfriend for over 3 years, and we enjoy each other's company. We've been living together for 5 months, which has resulted in my expenses more than doubling. We both work and we ...

A.   2 June 2017: Time to cut this entitled little madam loose. Tell her the free ride is over and if she is not prepared to contribute to shared expenses she needs to carry out her threat of "imply moving out" Please be aware this could mean the end of the rela... (read in full...)

Have I the right to feel narked?

Q.   I have met someone and seen him a few times. I knew it was his birthday coming up weeks ago. I have asked him if he wants to come over the day before his birthday which he has said he would love to do. I mentioned my daughter working at a race ...

A.   1 June 2017: Hi Elsbeth, I read your previous question, It seems that you and the new fellow have done more than simply seen each other a few times. Based on the ... (read in full...)

My wife wants my mother's house signed over to me before she will move!

Q.   I am married. About a year back I lost my job. Finding a new job has become challenging since I am nearing 50 years. I have a house which belongs to my mother. My wife wants to stay in a rented house which I have been paying high rent. I requested ...

A.   1 June 2017: I don't think you can convince her. My advise is that you tell her you cannot afford to live in the rental house with her any longer and that you are moving into your mother's house until you find further employment. Tell your wife she can com... (read in full...)

I want to tell his wife that I was his mistress

Q.   I am a 44 years old divorced woman. 15 years ago when I was 29, I dated this one guy who was an American soldier. I wasn’t very much attracted to him at first, so it took a lot of effort for him to get me into a relationship. We never said ‘I love ...

A.   30 May 2017: Why hurt that woman, she has done nothing wrong in all this. It wont punish him for cheating on her, nor will it absolve any guilt you hold for having sex with him even though you knew he was married. The best thing you can do is delete him from... (read in full...)

I am not getting enough quality time with my boyfriend.

Q.   For those of you in a long-term relationship, how much time do you spend with your significant other? Lately I've been feeling frustrated with the amount of time my boyfriend and I spend together. We've been dating for five years and don't live t...

A.   30 May 2017: I don't think you are clingy .... your relationship sounds boring and bland. When do you go on dates? What's in this relationship for you? It sounds as if the only time you spend together is when you sleep. Are there any fun times? Shared times? ... (read in full...)

My LDR boyfriend wants to try to have a baby but we would still be long distance after the baby was born.

Q.   hi guys and girls, i need some advice, i cant wrap my head around a situation what could happen. Me and my long distance relationship have been talking about the future, ( before I go into too much detail, we have been together over a year and a ha...

A.   19 May 2017: If you feel this is your last chance at having a child (ticking clock) and if you are fully prepared to be a single mother, and if you have done your sums and believe you can support a child then go for it. ... (read in full...)

So hard to control my feelings

Q.   I've been in a problematic "relationship" with a married acquaintance from my work for the past few months. We aren't full-time co-workers but we work together alone enough when he's around. I'm 23 and he's around 39-40ish. I had developed a bit ...

A.   17 May 2017: This pig of a man has four little babies relying on him ... what are his intentions, besides a quick session of sex with a young female, towards you. I understand about attractions, and he certainly isn't doing anything to put a stop to it is he... (read in full...)

Help me with this family situation, my father thinks I'm avoiding an event!

Q.   I have a difficult situation with my over 65 yr old parents Need advice please My parents live in another state that is a 1hour plane flight away I visit once a year and they come to my state, once a year to visit and and we talk on phone sometim...

A.   17 May 2017: An Aunt of mine insisted nobody but her immediate family be told she was terminal until AFTER her 75th birthday .... she wanted to see everybody happy and smiling when they gathered to celebrate. She died a few weeks later. Are you 100% sure you... (read in full...)

Help me with this family situation, my father thinks I'm avoiding an event!

Q.   I have a difficult situation with my over 65 yr old parents Need advice please My parents live in another state that is a 1hour plane flight away I visit once a year and they come to my state, once a year to visit and and we talk on phone sometim...

A.   17 May 2017: Cant? Or wont? Are you casual, and don't have any holidays you could take? Would it be possible to change your regular annual trip to happen in July rather than when you normally would? Your mother is getting old, she may feel (or even know) h... (read in full...)

Why is my partner continuing to flirt on line with other women? What should I do?

Q.   My partner and I met on a date site we both came off. Then he went back on so I had my broadband to block all sites. He now has a game on his phone where he can talk dirty to others. Why is he doing this? He never talks dirty to me ...

A.   9 May 2017: You cancelling your broadband didn't stop the behaviour you didn't like. Does the fact he was using your broadband mean he lives with you?? He is doing it because he can and because he doesn't have any respect for you. If he lives with you t... (read in full...)

Cheating in a LDR. What advice can you give to me re my Gf who I think may be cheating?

Q.   This is my long distance relationship. We are dating 6 months. I met my girlfriend through my cousin. In our relationship, she is always showing to me that she is nice girl, and a faithful wife in future. She treat me very nice. About my girlf...

A.   9 May 2017: This woman is not going to admit she was cheating. There is no benefit to her for doing that. You already know that this girl has sex very easily with men, you already suspect her reason for being your girlfriend is to get into the US, and you ... (read in full...)

My friends have started to act childish. How can I sort this out?

Q.   Unfortunately this sounds like children. I have a few friends ive never been interested in having lots of friends . Due to work and family commitments we dont get to see each other much nor message much. Two friends ive not spoken to in 2 month...

A.   9 May 2017: You have learnt something very valuable here, you know your ex best friend is not a person to be trusted. You also know the girl who was a bully is now a woman who is a bully. Personally I can't see why you would want to keep these people in ... (read in full...)

Pipeline wives: how do you do it?

Q.   my husband has presented the idea of him going to work on the pipeline on and off for the past two years or so now. i feel bad because every time he brings it up, i turn into a bitch (i'm woman enough to admit that) and nag until he drops it. i know ...

A.   7 May 2017: If you have no children or other ties then why not apply for a job as well. There are sure to be positions on site available to suit you, administration or maintenance, cleaning or even working in the mess. (I am basing my suggestions on the ... (read in full...)

What do I tell my child if he wants to know about his father's side of the family? My ex has another son, do I tell my child about him?

Q.   !6 years ago i was in a relationship and had a baby , the ex decided he didnt want us both so 'disappeared' moved away and denied it was his child. He was 8 years older than me i was 23 so not like we were young and didnt know about things. I neve...

A.   5 May 2017: When your child asks the questions give him age appropriate truthful answers.... (read in full...)

My husband is almost forcing me to have sex with my lesbian neighbor

Q.   Hi, my husband has recently come home after a month away and suddenly started wanting me to have sex with my lesbian next door neighbour, he doesn't want to watch or be involved at all. We have known she has a crush on me for a long time and given ...

A.   5 May 2017: Give your husband a choice, back off or move out. It seems odd that he is wanting you to have sex elsewhere after being away for a month. I would be asking him if he did anything while he was away which is now influencing his behaviour. Did he h... (read in full...)

Need some advice on a love-triangle situation, please?

Q.   Hello everyone, I would like some insight on a particular scenario involving two women, one of which is my current girlfriend and the other a friend and also pseudo-romantic interest. Let me explain the backstory. I met two different...

A.   4 May 2017: If you like C more than you like J, then you gently and respectfully break it off with J. It will be better for J to be hurt now rather than a few more months down the track. There is also the fact it is unfair for you to still be dating J while ... (read in full...)

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