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... Send *inktopaz a private message | | | *inktopaz's profile:I'm 29 and born and raised in California.
I've gone through quite a few relationships! Some were great and some were down right terrible!
I really enjoy trying to help people get through relationship woes. Sometimes they can be life consuming and everyone can use a little help from time-to-time.
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He's straight and I'm gay. How can I stop falling in love with him?
Q. I'm gay and I love one of my best friends and I told them a couple of months ago. They made it clear that they aren't, but they said that they respected the fact that I'm gay. I feel awkward when ever I pass him in the halls at school and I tryed to ...
A. 25 May 2010: You have far worse problems than the one you have with you friend...repelling ghosts and now you're diagnosing yourself as clinically depressed. Go see a doctor, PLEASE!... (read in full...)
Advice after weight loss, please?
Q. I guess I would start with this: About a year ago I weighed almost 200 lbs and now that I am down to 145, I am noticing a lot more about myself. Normally I just noticed the stretch marks and fat that my body had decorated itself with, but now I ...
A. 22 May 2010: It sounds like you probably just have little spider veins. I have a few on my legs too, not a big deal. I don't think there's anything you can really do to get rid of them besides maybe some sort of laser treatment? Otherwise, they're less ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to feel jealous, even though he hasn't done anything wrong?
Q. My Husband and I have been married for almost 7 years!We are both 31 years old. We have a pretty good relationship with an occasional argument here or there. However, he is and RN in a trauma hospital and he works with a TON of younger woman. ...
A. 21 May 2010: No...why would you be jealous and curious if he keeps the same routine? That sounds pretty predictable to me...
If you're so worried about these other women, lose a few pounds if it's needed and do your hair and wear makeup if you've been lac... (read in full...)
Did I handle this right?
Q. This last saturday I went to a party with all of my friends and saw this guy that my best guy friend told me that he thought I was cute. I went over to him and I'm not exactly sure how it happened but we ended up getting really close and we kissed ...
A. 21 May 2010: If he hasn't called you by now, then don't expect anything more from him than calling you to party and/or hookup.... (read in full...)
How much should one sacrfice for a pet?
Q. Hi everyone, I'm at my wits end and would greatly appreciate some input and opinions. My partner and I have been living together for 3 years, he is an absolutely wonderful boyfriend. Problem is he has a 12yr old epileptic dog, who has grand-mal ...
A. 21 May 2010: Well I wouldn't consider the way that you're feeling as "callous." But I can see both points of view. But comparing a dog with epileptic seizures to a child with epileptic seizures is really comparing apples to oranges and a really stupid comment ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend really has an interest in me or shes just using me or avoiding me
Q. hey guys, I was wondering if my girlfriend really has an interest in me or shes just using me or avoiding me. We started dating about a week ago but shes so confusing. She dosent like talking on the phone and never talks to me on myspace anymore. ...
A. 21 May 2010: Hmmm that is a little strange. Not that all girls are the same, but most girls like to talk to their boyfriends more than their boyfriends like talking to them. To me, it kind of sounds like she's using you as a meal ticket. It's probably best to ... (read in full...)
Got fired because my ex married the boss
Q. Years ago I dated a woman for a little while and then we broke up. We were only together for a few months. We did not stay in contact. I had a job working for a small company for ten years. In all that time I have seen a lot of people come and ...
A. 20 May 2010: Wow, I would get a lawyer if I were you! Depending on what state you live in, you can definitely have a case against the company.
If it's not something you really want to deal with (which I think you should just you piss him off and hopefull... (read in full...)
He'd been distant, so I broke up by text. But I don't understand his reply!
Q. So my bf has been very distant towards me. Actually he straight up stopped talking to me after a fight we had about my jealousy issue. I understand he needed time to cool off. It was a week then he called me, but I was in the middle of something and ...
A. 19 May 2010: Make him sweat it out...he deserves it after not talking to you for a week and then some days. ... (read in full...)
Why does my boyfriend leave out of nowhere?
Q. Okay, I was with my boyfriend and father of my child for 3 years and he recently left May 1st, but its not the first time he has left. Everytime that hes left before he always come back home within a day to a couple weeks, confused, and depressed. ...
A. 18 May 2010: Well we don't know why he leaves. But when you said that he comes back depressed and confused I thought of bipolar. That could perhaps be the problem or maybe he doesn't really know how to control his feelings and rather than figure them out at ... (read in full...)
Him watching porn is a side to him I don't know and I don't like it!
Q. Basically, I have the best boyfriend, soon to be fiancee but I hate him wanking to porn. I have never been bothered in past relationships but I think because we are so close I hate the fact he hides it from me. I feel it's a side to him I don't know ...
A. 18 May 2010: "I haven't said he can't watch it and obviously that isn't my decision to make but I am voicing how much it upset me as clearly that is something I cannot control."
You have no control...this is why you're upset. Also why you can't let this go ... (read in full...)
Do I wait for HIM to contact ME?
Q. I met a man over 3 years ago, first we just talked( as friends) then we dated then we were FWB, i fell for him HARD...........he is sweet, well mannered, easy to talk to and he made me feel so good when we slept together BUT he was not ready to ...
A. 17 May 2010: Well at least you talked to him and now you know. It makes it easier to move on. You'll find a nice guy, don't worry.... (read in full...)
He sees me only for casual sex and I care about him a lot! How do I deal with this?
Q. I feel so lonely... I have great friends,I am surrounded by great people but I feel so low. I found out the guy I was seeing only sees me as someone for casual sex, and I know for a fact that he is sleeping around. There are 2 other guys who I...
A. 10 May 2010: Well then keep being his "friend" and allowing him to use you for sex so you can continue to feel like shit about yourself. Is that the answer you want? Get a backbone first and deal with it...you lend him money and do whatever he wants. You're ... (read in full...)
What do I have to do to convince military boyfriend to stay with me even when he is deployed abroad?
Q. We met about a month ago through an online dating site and hit off instantly soon after we met. Well, about a week after we started dating, he got the news that he may be deploying in December, but back then, it was only a 50:50 chance. A few mor...
A. 10 May 2010: Well obviously he's been through this before...and trust me, you probably don't want to go through it. I dated a guy in the military and it was no walk in the park.
I live in a city where there's a lot of military, Navy and Marines, and there's ... (read in full...)
She can't get past the idea of smoking weed
Q. So my girlfriend and I have been going out for 6 months and we have a blast together. I've never been in a relationship so strong before. Recently, we've been fighting about one subject and one subject only: my smoking habits. It's not that I smoke ...
A. 9 May 2010: I can side with her in a way, a guy that smokes dope is usually a deal breaker for me. Like alcohol it does impair your thinking...and typically I associate a guy who smokes as a little loserish and immature. I'm not saying that you are, but it's ... (read in full...)
My pregnant fiancé has no energy and won't have sex with me
Q. My fiance doesn't want sex with me anymore... Please help! My fiance doesn't want sex with me anymore. She and I are both young and she is with child. She has no energy, she sits around the house all day, sleeps till after noon, with no job. I t...
A. 8 May 2010: Umm she's pregnant, get a grip. Yes, pregnant women sleep a lot. That cute little baby she has in her body is considered a parasite to her body and takes from her what it doesn't have. Leave her alone and quit acting like such a child...she ... (read in full...)
Him watching porn is a side to him I don't know and I don't like it!
Q. Basically, I have the best boyfriend, soon to be fiancee but I hate him wanking to porn. I have never been bothered in past relationships but I think because we are so close I hate the fact he hides it from me. I feel it's a side to him I don't know ...
A. 8 May 2010: You really need to get over it. Hmmm why would he lie to you and delete the history??? Probably because of the way you react. Do you think he really wants to hear you cry and whine over something that is not a big deal?
Guys watch porn...t... (read in full...)
Medicines to stop pregnancy?
Q. can any medicines stop pregnancy after a week? ...
A. 8 May 2010: No. ... (read in full...)
Does not taking the pill at the right time increase risk of pregnancy?
Q. i am on the pill but stuffed up taking it at the right time last week, i am in a relationship and we have recently had unprotected sex. can not taking my pill correctly for those days risk a chance at me getting pregnant...
A. 7 May 2010: For heaven's sake, read the pamphlet that comes with your birth control--it tells you in there. If you're not ready to become a parent then either A. Don't have sex B. Find a birth control method that you won't forget to take that way you don't ... (read in full...)
Why is my ex ignoring me?
Q. When my ex and i broke up we kinda remained friends (just occasionally talking not hanging out). one day we decided to see each other and we hooked up. he said he still has feelings for me always has always will and i said i have feelings too. since ...
A. 7 May 2010: Girl, get your head out of the clouds! He doesn't want to have a relationship with you anymore. You two hooked up, and he probably felt that way at the time but changed his mind. If he wanted to see you, he wouldn't have cancelled plans or just ... (read in full...)
How to Kiss A Taller Guy
Q. I'm still in high school and i have a new boyfriend. The problem is that he is 6feet tall and I'm 5'3. He hasn't had his first kiss yet and I can't reach him so I'm not sure how to get him to kiss me. :(...
A. 7 May 2010: Carry a step-stool in your backpack.... (read in full...)
I married for the wrong reasons and now feel I am missing out on life.
Q. Dear cupid I am very depressed with my life. I am young, married for almost 2 years and I have a child with my husband. I feel like I am missing out on my life and finding my true love. I am no longer attracted to my husband. I realize I married ...
A. 7 May 2010: Well a lot of people get married too young and end up divorcing later in life. It's an ugly truth, but it's reality. You've had to grow up pretty fast and it's true, you are missing out on life in a way...as in you can't just be independent and go ... (read in full...)
I'm having very strong urges to have an affair..would like to hear from others who have been there..done that
Q. I am a 44 year old male. Married for 15 years. I'll get right to the point: my marriage is having big problems right now and I am at a crossroads. I have never cheated before. But I have never felt the way I do now. I am visiting depths of emotio...
A. 7 May 2010: Well I wasn't married, but I did get cheated on. It's an awful feeling, you blame yourself because you think you're not good enough or did something wrong or you weren't doing something right. I've talked to others about this and EVERY time, EVERY ... (read in full...)
Used the morning after pill twice in a month ...
Q. Hey i have a question, first of all i have irregular periods, well i got my period beginning of march then end of april, but i had sex a week before i got my period of the month of april and i used next choice because i didnt want to get pregnant, ...
A. 5 May 2010: There's a possibility that you can be pregnant because you're having unprotected sex, not because you used next choice twice in one month. So of course there's a possibility that you could be pregnant. If you got your period at the end of april ... (read in full...)
He dumped me because of his friend!
Q. There was this guy back in highschool, who I really liked. But I knew that we'd never be together because he didn't see me that way, if you know what I mean. He was really interested in a friend of mine, and even when she told him she wasn't ...
A. 5 May 2010: Like another poster said, "bros before hos." Not implying you're a ho, but honestly, if your bestfriend started dating one of your exboyfriends REGARDLESS if you cared or not about him anymore, you'd probably be at least a little annoyed. Even ... (read in full...)
Should I write a letter telling him how I feel?
Q. I've been trying to tell my friend how I feel about him by saying it online because I'm very shy and don't want to say it in school. I told him that I like him and other things like the way he's been distant is hurting me. Would he be offended? I'm ...
A. 5 May 2010: I don't think he would be offended, but I don't think you'll get the results that you're looking for. You already told him that you like him and he sometimes doesn't even respond to what you tell him. He's avoiding you probably because he doesn't ... (read in full...)
Interpreting 1st date communication!
Q. So, I need an interpretation of post-first date communication, please! I went on my first date in 9 years today (split with my bf of 8 1/2 years 6 months ago, took a long time to feel better and get the confidence to date again). I think it went ...
A. 2 May 2010: Well I'd find this a little confusing too...if he emailed you right after, then that definitely shows a lot of interest...but then he says he wants to "keep in touch." That's kind of stupid of him to say. Either he's trying to sound casual about ... (read in full...)
I think my room mate's ex was hitting on me
Q. My roommate and her boyfriend broke up a week or so ago after a little over a year together. They still talk to each other, but are not officially "seeing each other." Last night her ex IMed me on facebook and we started talking, and it seemed ...
A. 2 May 2010: Yeah, he was definitely hitting on you. This is something you don't want to get in the middle of and it's really messed up of him to be hitting on you like that only a week after they broke up. It's really inappropriate of him in general. If I ... (read in full...)
Can I trust him again? He's always showing signs of cheating!
Q. Im a 32 yr old who has been screwed over by every man ive ever been with..when me and my husband now got together i accussed him so much,but he would always say he would show he was different.Well oct.of 08 i found out he was txt a girl from a bank ...
A. 1 May 2010: I think it's pretty hard to trust someone who can't be trusted...I think you really need to consider marriage counseling if you want your marriage to work.... (read in full...)
My girlfriend got so jealous she threw an iron at my head. Should I dump her?
Q. I have been dating someone for a year now and it has gotten to be very serious. I work the graveyard shift at a resturaunt and a few weeks ago I was very sick and didn't finish my shift. One of the waitresses is a very dear friend of mine liv...
A. 29 April 2010: Yeah, she sounds a bit violent. However, not calling her for two days and finding out that you're at your friends house made her jump to conclusions. I can see why she'd be pissed, but I don't think she should have thrown an iron at you. I may ... (read in full...)
I want to make this relationship work, but he admitted to molesting his sister
Q. My boyfriend just recently told me he had a dark secret. It took me hours to convince him to tell me. After I broke through to him he told me he molested his sister when he was about 11 or 12 and she was 8. He paid her money to give him blowjobs and ...
A. 28 April 2010: You said that you're not willing to break up with him, what else do you want us to tell you? You really want us to give you "tips" on how you can get over being disgusted at the fact that your boyfriend molested his own sister? It's just as ... (read in full...)
He says that he loves me, but he dumped me, what's going on?
Q. My ex is STILL saying he loves me, it has been a month since he dumped me. I told him to stop saying this to me but he said no, and that he would always love and care about me. He said,why can't you accept my love,whatever form it is in?..What does ...
A. 28 April 2010: Oh please, tell him to shove his "I love you's" where the sun don't shine. I had a boyfriend that did this too and it's just a crock. He loves you as a friend but he's not in love with you; otherwise, you'd still be in a relationship. As time ... (read in full...)
She told me she needs at least 6"
Q. Huge problem. I have small penis 4in when fully react. I had two previous girlfriends tell mr when can't feel anything it's too small. I know the foreplay part but doesn't work. Now I been with a sweet girl for 6 months she say im her everything. ...
A. 27 April 2010: If she really likes you, she'll be willing to work with it; not tell you, "I need at least 6 inches." I'll be honest, most girls do care about size; however, if a girl likes the guy enough besides his size, she'll be okay with it and find other ... (read in full...)
I've got a child-like mind, I daydream, and believe in things that aren't real. Is this normal or am I stupid?
Q. I,ve not really had a great childhood when i was five i moved house to the middle of nowere where there were no kids or anythin and I lived on the main road so i couldnt really go out anywere to explore. Now I,m 18 I tink myself I,ve a very child ...
A. 23 April 2010: Daydreaming is fine...but what do you mean that you believe in things that aren't real? Like vampires? I would say you're schizo, but then you wouldn't know that they're not real. Daydreaming and using your immagination is good, we often lose it ... (read in full...)
He's been taking me for granted, but now he's talking about how much he needs me?
Q. My boyfriend has been taking me for granted lately and I began pulling away to do my own thing. Last night he told me that I don't love him or care about him anymore. I responded "if this is a break up, just be up front with me and I will go on with ...
A. 23 April 2010: Take it slow. He's acting this way because he's starting to think that he's about to lose you (you're playing this off good by the way). Don't commit to anything just yet, but let him know that you've felt like he's taken you for granted in the ... (read in full...)
I'm a day late!! Could I be pregnant?
Q. I just lost my virginity on sunday, it is now Wednesday of the same week, i am on the pill and have been on it for quite a while(for my skin and cramps) im supposed to get my period today! however i dont have it! we didnt use a condom because i...
A. 22 April 2010: Doubt it. If you have sex when you're not used to having it, it can make you late or early. Don't know the exact reasoning behind it, don't even know if it's scientific, but it does happen to me and other friends of mine. If you take your pill as ... (read in full...)
Would you date someone like that?
Q. my boyfriend has a high school diploma ad he does not know if he wants to go back to school, while i am getting my bachelors. he does not have a bank account, he is not that intelligent meaning he can not really read or spell that great. ...
A. 22 April 2010: Nooo...I would not date someone like that. Think of it this way: you want to be with someone that's at least your equal. You obviously have goals and want to have a decent lifestyle. He's immature with no goals and doesn't really seem to care one ... (read in full...)
I'm about to be a dad for the third time and don't know how to tell my parents!
Q. When I was 17 I got my then gf who was also 17 pregnant. We were young and didn't use protection. A few weeks after my son Shade turned 1 we broke up and she left Shade with me and moved out of town. My parents were really supportive and helped out ...
A. 22 April 2010: Definitely don't give up. You're really close to being finished with school and if you give up, you'll be giving up on your kids. Yeah, your parents are probably going to throw a shitfit...because let's be honest; she's pregnant AGAIN out of ... (read in full...)
Is eight guys too many?
Q. this is kind of stupid to ask but i just want to know people's opinion (go easy please :P) i am 18 and over the last 2 years i have had sex with 8 guys. is that too many? does that make me a slut? only 3 of the guys was i in any sort of relationship ...
A. 21 April 2010: 18 and 8 guys in two years...yeah, it's quite a bit. I've known worse, but I won't get into that. Obviously, it's something that probably bothers you a little, but you can always change that. Some would consider it slutty, some would not. It's ... (read in full...)
Unprotected sex for last 3 weeks..am I pregnant?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been having intercourse without proctection for the last 20days last week i started feeling sick randomly and everytime i get up i feel extremly dizzy makes me feel more sick and have a headache also i started smelling...
A. 20 April 2010: Yep, sounds like it. Take a test.... (read in full...)
Troubled about her sexual past
Q. Well, i just got married 5 months ago with the one i'm in love with but i started having a problem when i think of her ex-boyfriends with whom she had sex before we knew each other. Before our marriage she told me everything about her past; wh...
A. 20 April 2010: It's in the past, you weren't there. If you decided to marry someone else, the next person would have a sexual past too. I'm sure you weren't "pure" either when you got married just 5-months ago. Don't be upset at her over something that you're ... (read in full...)
Will our relationship be negatively affected by this?
Q. Me and my boifrend masterbate while talking on the phone evryday. Can this harm me in any way?...
A. 20 April 2010: You may develop hairy palms and blindness.... (read in full...)
He's straight and I'm gay. How can I stop falling in love with him?
Q. I'm gay and I love one of my best friends and I told them a couple of months ago. They made it clear that they aren't, but they said that they respected the fact that I'm gay. I feel awkward when ever I pass him in the halls at school and I tryed to ...
A. 20 April 2010: Just like how your friends respect that you're gay, you also need to respect that they're straight and nothing is going to happen. Just come to terms that they are only friends and people that you cannot be romantically involved with. If you have ... (read in full...)
Do I wait for HIM to contact ME?
Q. I met a man over 3 years ago, first we just talked( as friends) then we dated then we were FWB, i fell for him HARD...........he is sweet, well mannered, easy to talk to and he made me feel so good when we slept together BUT he was not ready to ...
A. 12 April 2010: Hmm...well in my opinion, a guy doesn't really want to be your friend (or even your best friend for that matter) if he doesn't have at least some feelings for you. I think once you're done with school you can contact him. Be careful not to bombard ... (read in full...)
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