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*ougbcoll

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Is it normal to fall in love with someone else while you're in a relationship?

Q.   This is going to sound depressing but... Is it normal to fall in love with someone else when you're in a relationship? I see it happen ALL the time...Where one partner stops loving their partner and falls in love with another person. In fact,...

A.   17 May 2014:  the grass is greener on the other side. infatuation indeed , the excitement of the new exciting, mystery of the new, the enticement of the new. why not get rid of the old. love is more than a feeling. love is more than falling in love... (read in full...)

I had a threesome before I got married. Do I tell my husband?

Q.   I was involved in a once only threesome with my ex bf and another girl. Deeply regretted. Should I tell the man I married later? He has had premarital sex but not of this kind....

A.   3 May 2014:  part of any relationship is being honest to each other. not sneaking around on the one you love, not hiding things from the one you love, not lying to the one you love. it is more than likely bothering you ... (read in full...)

My friends tell me I should give my boyfriend a BJ

Q.   A lot of my friends are wanting me to give my boyfriend a blowjob, and he agreed to wanting me too when i asked. But i feel like we are kind of young for this to be happening. My friends said it was okay because we have been dating for 6 months, but ...

A.   2 May 2014:  you are too young, and you feel it also. a boy that only wants you for sexual favors does not love you. he will be after one thing, he will tell you what you want to hear so he can get what he wants. a boy that loves you will not ... (read in full...)

Woman I'm sleeping with is becoming weird and clingy, how do I handle it?

Q.   Okay, So I have a little dilemma. I've been sleeping with this woman I met. She's cool and everything and when we hang out we have a nice time, but she's becoming extraordinarily clingy. She texts things like "Do you miss me? What do you miss...

A.   29 April 2014:  what do you expect, you are having sex with her and expect her to act like she does not care? sex is a powerful emotion bonding. you may have had sex with no strings attach thought toward her , just use her for your pleasure. with... (read in full...)

I found out my married lover is not planning on getting divorced after all! Who should I confront, him or his wife?

Q.   I fell for my coworker who told me that his wife had left him, only to find out from another colleague that they are actually planning buying a new house together! I feel so stupid and sick to the stomach, but I can't bring myself to say anything...

A.   23 April 2014:  guys like that will tell you what you want to hear just to bed you. you are the icing on the cake, he has his cake at home. you more than likely are not the first he has done this too. his wife either does not know, or pretends not to know... (read in full...)

How can I stop feeling so lonely all the time?

Q.   To make a long story short, I've always felt very lonely. As a kid my parents moved me around a lot and to different schools and I never really made any friends. High School was pretty bad because I was bullied. I have always been on the chubby side ...

A.   15 April 2014:  maybe look at a church to meet new friends , and maybe meet a boyfriend . that should be a place to help with the feeling of being lonely. ... (read in full...)

What's worse? Being in a relationship with a cheating coward or an arrogant know-it-all?

Q.   What's worse? - Being in a relationshpip with a cheating coward or a arrogant know-it-all? Or are both types equally undesirable? Any related comments or thoughts would be very helpful. Thank you ...

A.   15 April 2014:  they both have character flaws. and in one way they are a like. the cheater, cheats because they think of them self and place them self above anyone else. the arrogant know it all, think they are better than everyone else and think highly of ... (read in full...)

Feeling like I will never have a boyfriend.

Q.   Hi, I am having a problem I'm only 21 which I know is considered pretty young, but I feel like I will never have a boyfriend. I've had a couple of 'boyfriends' back in high school that didn't really last long and they weren't that serious about me...

A.   13 April 2014:  don't give up on yourself, don't get into despair or lower your standards. maybe your friends can sit you up with a guy or a friend of their boyfriend knows. if you attend church look to meet someone in your age range, if no young people ... (read in full...)

My wife told me about her past sex life and now I can't even look at her

Q.   My wife told me of her sex life before, she would go on no strings attached websites and meet men ...3 sums , now I feel sick my wife was passed around groups and used as a sex toy and she loved it , now I can't even look at her, what should I do?...

A.   8 April 2014:  i don't have a lot of information on how long you have been married to her, why see disclosed this information now ? every thing we do in life effects someone else for the good, or for the bad. you say she loved it, when she... (read in full...)

How can I move on and forgive myself?

Q.   Dear cupid, how can you move on and forgive yourself for hurting the love of your life? How do you get over it? I unexpectedly met an amazing guy a little over a year ago, and we got together. Not to sound like a typical woman but he was the best ...

A.   2 April 2014:  if you really love him, and want him back in your life, go to him and tell him from your heart you have hurt him, and you love him. you have nothing to loose and hopefully him to gain. if you do not even try you will always wonder what... (read in full...)

Is he rushing me because he wants to bed me?

Q.   So I'm texting a guy who is 9 yrs older than me we've only met once and both admitted there was a strong chemistry we are planning to meet but he seems to be coming across maybe a bit too strongly. Like he's alway saying that we are pointless ...

A.   6 February 2014: It should be a warning sign to you already if you are posting on here about him wanting to rush into bed with you. You already have warning flags going up in your mind. Use caution with this guy he is 9 years older than you. You have never met him ... (read in full...)

For nine years I believed my lover was married but I've recently learned he isn't

Q.   I began this relationship with my lover over 9 years ago and up until a 2 weeks ago believed that he was married because he told me so. He revealed in an online conversation that he was never legally married to the woman he claimed as his wife. N...

A.   6 February 2014: The guy lied to you, simple and basic. More than likely he also lied to the other woman about things also. You have a relationship built on mistrust with a weak foundation to build upon. He has been using and giving you lies for the past 9 years.... (read in full...)

Am I wrong to be curious about what sex is like with other men?

Q.   I've been with my boyfriend for a year. It's my first serious relationship. He's 40. I'm 23. We get along well. Sex is good most of the time. He makes me laugh, he's kind, listens and really cares about me. The thing is lately I've been thinki...

A.   25 January 2014:  its normal to be curious, but when you cross the line is when damage to your relationship will happen. when trust is broken it is hard to get back, and if trust is ever restored it will never be the same. your asking if y... (read in full...)

He keeps throwing my past relationships in my face!

Q.   Hello everyone ! I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a half now. I love my boyfriend but lately things have been going downhill. He can't let go of my past. I don't know how he found out I hooked up with a guy before him and he keeps th...

A.   28 December 2013:  " i don't know what to do anymore. i don't wanna deal with this anymore " come clean with him tell him you was young and stupid, tell him from your heart that you made mistakes. the fact they were meaningless sex does not help... (read in full...)

When are you ready to settle down? How do you know?

Q.   How do you know when you're ready to settle down? I want someone to come home to every night, to be there for my son and I, but I still look at all these attractive men and think wow. I have so many options. I'm seeing a sweet, kind, amazing man who ...

A.   18 December 2013:  you have to come to the end of yourself. what i mean by that is you get tired of the meaningless self centered lifestyle you are living. the shallow thinking of self only, and welling to put someone that you care for ahead of your needs ... (read in full...)

Why do guys ask for underwear?

Q.   I slept with this guy like more than 5 times. He asked for my underwear twice and on his third ask, I decided, why not? So I gave them to him. I just want to understand this phenomena... why do guys ask for underwear? I'm curious. I just hope I ...

A.   11 December 2013:  it has to do with the scent of your woman, even while she is away you still have her scent close to you.... (read in full...)

My boyfriend died 2 years ago and I don't know how to move on

Q.   He was my childhood bestfriend and we started dating when i was 14 and half years old. I am 19 now. He was my first boyfriend, first kiss, and basically he was my first at everything. We were very naive. We actually started talking about where we...

A.   5 December 2013:  this is tough, your letter even touched my emotions. I wish i had a magic formula but i don't. all i know and can tell you your boyfriend would not have wanted you to be this sad, and empty. he would not want you to go through live like ... (read in full...)

How can I help my son financially without it causing further tension?

Q.   21 November 2013: My 29 year old son has just got himself a good job but he is on 6 months probation before his position is confirmed. He needs a car to get to and from work and has no money to fund the purchase himself. He is unlikely to be able to ...

A.   21 November 2013:  "he is being very insistent about the make of car that he wants and wont consider". the way I look at it begger's can't be choosers. what ever happened to kids being grateful to their parents that is helping them out? he is 29 years ol... (read in full...)

Am I being clingy and controlling? Do I care too much?

Q.   hi quick question, my boyfriend and i have been together now for 2 years. Whenever time he goes out, whether to his dad's house or out with friends he does not like to tell me and we live together. I find it disrespectful and rude. I compla...

A.   16 November 2013:  from the limited information you gave that doe's not seem over the top. its normal to want to know were a person that you love is going. he says you get mad, and you say you do not? miscommunication seems to be a problem here. he doe's no... (read in full...)

Am I unintentionally kind of leading him on?

Q.   Am I unintentionally kind of leading him on? I've been seeing a man for about 5 months. He's very sweet and has a lot of qualities I love...but I'm not positive I'm "in love" sometimes I feel like I am, and I feel like if he were to say it, I wou...

A.   15 November 2013:  "i am unintentionally kind of leading him on?" love is a choice, love is of giving of your self to the other person, love is sharing, love is putting the other person's best interest ahead of your own. "I'm not trying to lead him on,but ... (read in full...)

Why is divorce a problem for a liar cheater wife?

Q.   My wife started cheating on me around the year 2000. I confronted her and she was extremely sorry, so she made me believe. A few years later she was cheating again and after all the wasted effort I put into salvaging our marriage I knew it was over. ...

A.   15 November 2013:  you said it "she is using you." she cheated on you years ago and back to her old tricks again "if she ever stopped." she doe's not want a divorce , she has it made. she has her cake and eating it too. your helping her with her... (read in full...)

Hypocrites who justify cheating.....what's going through their minds?

Q.   Help me out here. How can a woman accuse her husband of cheating and then justify her own affair as a form of retaliation, or as a means to quench her insatiable thirst for attention? She gets all bent out of shape when she suspects that her husband ...

A.   12 November 2013:  cheating is cheating no mater who doe's it. one thing that is missing in this day and time is self accountability, no one seems to want to be responsible for their own actions. everything we do effects someone else for the positive or ... (read in full...)

Why do abusive men cheat?

Q.   I just got out of an abusive relationship. Not only was he physically and verbally abusive but now I found out that he had been cheating on me our entire relationship. He always had accused me of cheating and now I know why because he was the one ...

A.   7 November 2013:  "so my question is why do abusive men cheat?" it all comes down to men that are like that think of nothing but them self, they really don't have enough love for anyone else but them self. they are out to get what satisfies them, and ... (read in full...)

Should you reveal what you did in the past?

Q.   What does everyone think about revealing a shameful episode of cheating on a previous partner to a future partner? If cheating took place in a long , supposedly committed relationship, and went on for a few months then is this something that n...

A.   5 November 2013:  i believe that in a relationship one of the foundations is honesty. that includes not hiding things from the one you love. and that allows for a clear conscience also. sure the past is in the past, and can't be changed. its good to m... (read in full...)

How do I tell my parents about this much older guy in prison?

Q.   I am in love with a man that's 24 years older than me seems to really feel the same about me he is wanting to become a pastor really soon he knows slot about the Bible and he is devoted to God he is 53 I'm 29 he is currently in prison and has only ...

A.   31 October 2013:  " how do i tell my parents about our relationship." well you are 29 and old enough to make decisions in your life. but you are worried how they will react to him being in prison right? the best thing i would think is tell them abo... (read in full...)

How can something feel so right yet be so wrong? In love with a married man who loves me too, but also loves his wife and wont leave her.....

Q.   I don't know what to do... I don't even know how to start. I never been on any of these sites before.. this is also a long story. I met this man at a work place..once I was working there he texted me and would flirt just a little (he had my numbe...

A.   29 October 2013:  you are in the middle, you are the other woman. it appears he is committed to his wife, and an emotional affair with you. your heart is totally given to him, and his heart is divided between his love for his wife, and you. if he wa... (read in full...)

I get intimate with guys too soon

Q.   I have a tendency to meet a guy and get into his bed (not for sex but to mess around nude) by the second or third date. Usually not intentionally. Its like I flirt and want to kiss and stop there but guy wants more, I pity them and give in. For ...

A.   18 October 2013:  self respect is not making yourself cheap to guys. "how do i stop?" you need to meet a nice guy ,not the type of guys you are hanging around with. all they want is what you have, to use you for sex. change the type of places you ... (read in full...)

I get intimate with guys too soon

Q.   I have a tendency to meet a guy and get into his bed (not for sex but to mess around nude) by the second or third date. Usually not intentionally. Its like I flirt and want to kiss and stop there but guy wants more, I pity them and give in. For ...

A.   18 October 2013:  " how do i stop thinking that way (giving into guys) and start thinking right?" you need to start by changing some of your habits such as drinking to loosen up, getting into his bed(not for sex), you need to not mess around with the guys ... (read in full...)

My Bf has not told his parents that we live together. His mother wants to visit him. How do I get through this?

Q.   Hi!! I'm kind of stuck at the moment. I'm chinese born and raised here. My boyfriend and I are the same religion Hindus. He's from the states as well but born in London. His parents are also in the USA. So my question is. My boyfriend and Iive ...

A.   16 October 2013:  you will have to come clean sometime. putting up a front will not work forever, plus you are having to live knowing you are hiding the truth from his mom. all that is going to do is cause hard feelings, and put you in the middle. cove... (read in full...)

How do I gain my boyfriend's trust again? How do I prove I won't cheat?

Q.   How to gain my bf's trust on me again? I been together with my bf for almost 3 years, he has always been the jealous type. But he recently found out that just before we stated to go out I had a started texting a married guy who is a player an...

A.   10 October 2013:  "please give me advice to gain his trust back how can i prove to him that i would never do anything like that again." we live in an instant society today. we have microwave cooking , drive thru meals, instant banking. we want ... (read in full...)

Has anyone's ex come back after they've appeared to have moved on?

Q.   has anyone's ex come back after they've appeared to have moved on? kinda like "if its meant to be it will be" type thing? my ex jumped into another relationship only a couple months after he walked away from our relationship. we were very seriou...

A.   8 October 2013:  Honeypie is right it is rare but can happen, no need to give up , but you do not need to have a false hope either. "has anyone's ex come back after appeared to have moved on?" i can say yes to that on my part, my girlfriend and i split ... (read in full...)

Can our relationship get past the cheating? How can we work through it?

Q.   Please dont lecture me. I know I've done wrong. I've been with my boyfriend for 8 years, Im 24, he's 26. We've had a rocky time in the beginning but have been good for the last few years. Until I drunkenly slept with someone behind his back,...

A.   7 October 2013:  " I've been with my boyfriend for eight years" " i drunkenly slept with someone behind his back,. since i did it , I've been distraught." "In the first two years of our relationship he cheated on me multiple times and I chose to... (read in full...)

He's in jail now. When he gets out do I tell him I was a prostitute and other things about my past?

Q.   So I'm talking to a man, who is currently in prison for a charge he caught at 17, for burglary. He gets out in 12 days, and I plan on spending time with him. We write all the time and I have met him. My problem is, he wants to know me, like rea...

A.   5 October 2013:  "should i not let him in that close ? or just be honest?" well if your relationship with him or anyone else grows or goes anywhere, not being honest well more than likely eat at you. i believe you would not be posting for help on this ... (read in full...)

How do I handle these obnoxious co-workers?

Q.   How should I handle these girls? I hate them? So I got a new job a few months ago and the girls there are horrible. They are very unfriendly and don't speak to me so I don't bother with them either. They are 3 girls and whenever they...

A.   3 October 2013:  it is more than likely from jealousy the way they are acting toward you. " should i ask them what their problem is?" i would suggest not stooping down to their level. if i was going to ask them what the prob... (read in full...)

Suffering erectile dysfunction. Would it be wrong to encourage my wife to take lovers?

Q.   I become unable to perform with a full erection. My wife thinks that I no longer want her and am gay or at least bi-sexual.I get very excited thinking about and talking about her having a sexual encounter with another man. She is using topical ...

A.   3 October 2013:  it would be wrong and you will change your relationship with your wife, and maybe lose her. you may cause great damage to your marriage. i would be seeing a doctor getting the blue pill, or vacuum pump. not farming out your wife. ... (read in full...)

Its a wonderful opportunity for her, but what about me?

Q.   i've been seeing my current girlfriend for a little over a year now. we have an absolutely wonderful and loving relationship. she's my best friend. with all of that being said, she has informed me that more than likely, she's going to spend 8...

A.   3 October 2013:  you need to let her know how you feel about her, let her know that you feel awful at the thought of her being gone that long. you need to open up now not wait until she is gone. let her know what you are feeling, how you feel about her, and ... (read in full...)

My dad doesn't want me to date my boyfriend?!

Q.   I'm 17 years old and my boyfriend is 20. I have been dating him for nearly a year and a half now but my parents never approved. My mom doesn't say much about the relationship but my dad is being stubborn and keeps comparing it to the past/bad ...

A.   3 October 2013:  " I'M 17 YEARS OLD AND MY BOYFRIEND IS 20." you and your boyfriend are the same age my wife and i was when we first dated, we have been married now for 30 years. we went through some of what you are going through , i am sorry fo... (read in full...)

Will he wait for me?

Q.   I really like this guy at work, I am on a contract that ends in the next 8 months but the work policy does not allow employees to form relationships as it creates conflict of interests. We flirt a lot and he responds very well, I have a feeling he ...

A.   30 September 2013:  "is it possible for a man to wait for a woman?" yes it is possible if a man has someone that he cares about or cares about him, its not impossible. "is there anything i can do to convince him i am worth the wait." yes but someone ... (read in full...)

"I'll love you even if we break up": why would a guy say that?

Q.   My boyfriend of 9 months had a few drinks on Friday and said "I love you, I'll love you even if we break up". He also said he's decided he's too "selfish" to have a child. I didn't engage the conversation because he had been drinking. He knows I ...

A.   25 September 2013:  i would confront him about it. more than likely he will blame his drinking for what he said. i look at it more like his drinking just brought out what was in his heart, and said it verbally. you need to make sure you are on the same page with ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend says I don't have enough experience

Q.   My boyfriend told me last night that he is concerned that I don't have enough sexual experience for him to get more serious about our relationship. He is concerned that since I have only been in one other serious relationship that I cant be ready ...

A.   25 September 2013:  the guy you are with is giving you some bad advice. the only part i would agree with is you need to date someone else. find someone that will respect you, protect you, and not try to throw you to the wolves. what kind of guy are you ... (read in full...)

I worry that men think I'm only good for sex

Q.   Even though I have had relationships in the past, lately I think sometimes that I am only good for sex and I guess it's because of the guys I meet. I am attractive and whenever I talk to them they just see my body and not my personality so I...

A.   25 September 2013:  "i think sometimes i am only good for sex, and i guess its because of the guys i meet." that is a starting point, where you are meeting the type of guys that you are ending up with. this may and will determine the type of guys you are ... (read in full...)

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