| Latest articles: How to give better advice..
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
6 November 2009: This is a follow-up to my article on "how to get good advice" located at http://www.dearcupid.org/question/how-to-get-good-advice.html This time I am going to delve into the area on how to give good or better advice to those who are seeking it. ...
Playing with Statistics of Chance
No replies yet... 21 March 2009: After reading a lot of "What are my chances.." type questions, I figured I'd delve into the little aspect of statistics of chance. A guy named Aaron Levenstein once said, "Statistics are like bikinis. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they ...
How to get good advice?
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 February 2009: You ask for someone's advice and expect to get good advice back, what do you do? You tell them your story and expect to get a good response back. Do you always get it? Sometimes yes, sometimes no. There are a variety of steps you need to consider to ...
Do these boots make my butt look big and the lies we tell.
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
10 February 2009: LIES! All of us tell lies from time to time. Sometimes small innocent lies, sometimes big giant lies. Some lies save us from being yelled at by our partners and others make our partners scream at us. Why do we do it? Can we not just get by not ...
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I broke up with him! Is he an abuser?
Q. My boyfriend of four years(long distance for about 2 years, he lives in england) have just broke up because i have decided to end it after her verbally attacked me over a ridiculous reason. Here it goes...so my boyfriend is 25, lives alone pays his ...
A. 1 November 2009: I'm going to have to disagree with Minnie... both parties did used abusive language... which does not necessarily mean they are abusers in the long run. A lot of things can be said in arguments.. But I will say that using manipulative statements and ... (read in full...)
If I leave him he has no one else!
Q. Hi, I'm in need of some help,I have been with my boyfriend for the last 3 years, and i now feel like i'm stuck because if I leave him he has no one else. this is because he changed universitys (to the one im at)and has made no other friends. H...
A. 31 October 2009: If you don't love him, then leave. Why should you care that he has noone else? He may have noone else because you are there for him.. Once you are gone, he can make his own choice to whether he wants to find someone else or live in loneliness.... (read in full...)
He must think I'm so stupid!
Q. I dont know if i am over reacting but, recently i found on my boyfriends laptop a number of folders of girls pictures which must equal to over 300 pictures of half naked girls etc including my best friends! But he said sorry and that he forgot i...
A. 31 October 2009: Stop snooping or find a new boyfriend..
A) It is logical that he may have a folder of half naked pics of girls on his pc.. I have tons of folders I never go in and totally forget about and don't even remember what I put in there..
B) His ... (read in full...)
I broke up with him! Is he an abuser?
Q. My boyfriend of four years(long distance for about 2 years, he lives in england) have just broke up because i have decided to end it after her verbally attacked me over a ridiculous reason. Here it goes...so my boyfriend is 25, lives alone pays his ...
A. 31 October 2009: I wouldn't call that a sure sign of abuse. Screaming arguments are not abuse especially considering you atogonized it by saying that you would find a new boyfriend that would support you.. And this whole argument started over boots? I would believe ... (read in full...)
What can I do about the rumors being spread about me?
Q. hi am 15 and i have been having a hard time at school a girl has spreaded a rumor about me, the rumor is that am a lesbain it was ages ago but ever since then everyone has been shouting names at me like lesbo lesbain it really upsets me my mum and ...
A. 29 October 2009: If your guidance counselors are not doing anything about, they are failing you as authority figures.. Calling someone or pointing out one's sexual preference whether it is true or not is what a lot of places would consider sexual harrassment.
... (read in full...)
Should I have a threesome to not lose him?
Q. My live in boyfriend and I have been together almost a year now. We have a house and have been living together for about 3 months. When we first started dating, the "have you ever?" conversation came up and he asked me about my past experience with ...
A. 29 October 2009: I would say that if you are uncomfortable with it, then you are better off losing him than giving him what he wants.. just because you have done it in the past in a different situation, does not mean you want to do it now in this situation..
... (read in full...)
Should I let her past bug me?
Q. I found out that the women that i am dating for 6 mths has had 22 men in her past,some where relationships of 1 to 2 yrs in length but most where only a few mths in length and then she tells me that she has had 4 one nite stands.She is 35 yrs old ...
A. 29 October 2009: if you really loved her, her past wouldnt be a big problem. if you want to be with her, you need to put the past behind you. To put thihhs in some sort of perspective, i knew a girl that was 18 who had 25 different past partners...... (read in full...)
Ladies: what is your experience with sex on prom night?
Q. I’m going to the winter formal soon. I truely care about my boyfriend . I look forward to a the evening of dressing up etc. the thought of sex has entered my mind. If we have sex on the winter formal night I think it should be with someone like my ...
A. 28 October 2009: Come on TasteofIndia.. Accordians are so underrated.. they have so much range and are very portable.. The world doesn't appreciate it much... and it can be used for a moonlight serenade.. bagpipes however.. yeah I dont see how those can be ... (read in full...)
Ladies: what is your experience with sex on prom night?
Q. I’m going to the winter formal soon. I truely care about my boyfriend . I look forward to a the evening of dressing up etc. the thought of sex has entered my mind. If we have sex on the winter formal night I think it should be with someone like my ...
A. 28 October 2009: I will say one thing.. just because it's a fancy night, does not mean that it has to end with sex... ... (read in full...)
Overhead my boyfriend say he would have sex with some girl!
Q. I am 23 years old and am almost 6 months pregnant. I have been with my boyfriend for about a year and a half. We love eachother very much. The pregnancy was planned, we both wanted and talked about it before it happened. I have a hard time tusting ...
A. 28 October 2009: You get in a relationship with a guy that you know has cheated on all of his girlfriends and you are afraid that he will do the same to you.. I'm sorry, but you can be mad at him, but the bigger part is that it will be your fault as well considering ... (read in full...)
Do you think my driving instructor likes me?
Q. i think my driving insructor fancies me and told me he loved me by text. he is a joker and a few of my mates go to him. he slaps my leg when he gives me orders but also does this to my freinds. when he texts me about my driving lessons he sends me...
A. 28 October 2009: Easy answer... find a new driving instructor.
This guy is a bit perverse and you should cut off all communication... he is just trying to get into your pants and will not stick around much beyond that.. Definitely find a new instructor.... (read in full...)
Does he have an inside agenda... or what...???
Q. Aunts please help? I've had sex with this guy twice. I've known him since childhood, but not personally. We didn't use protection but he pulled out the first time, this second time he didn't. What's up with this... I didn't know until after...
A. 28 October 2009: Yes I took "two weeks since I spoke with him last." as that you haven't spoken with him in 2 weeks rather than you have sex 2 weeks apart..
But if you have been using the withdrawal method without getting pregnant, you've been lucky so far, bec... (read in full...)
Does he have an inside agenda... or what...???
Q. Aunts please help? I've had sex with this guy twice. I've known him since childhood, but not personally. We didn't use protection but he pulled out the first time, this second time he didn't. What's up with this... I didn't know until after...
A. 28 October 2009: Whether he pulled out or came inside of you, you still have a chance to get pregnant from it. Of course, cumming inside increases the risk, but the withdrawal method is NOT a method of preventing becoming pregnant.
As for why he came inside o... (read in full...)
Russian brides? Con artists?
Q. Hello Here is my story about Russian Brides and would like to see if anyone can help me out I am 19 and in Feburary 2009 my father passed away at the age of 63. In 2006 he met a woman named Viktoria from Tibilsi Georgia, in Febuary 2006 on...
A. 24 October 2009: I'm surprised she doesn't face any charges from the fact that she didn't call an ambulance when he was havign a heart attack.... a headache is not a good reason.. ... (read in full...)
Husband doesn't want me to touch him because he's ticklish?
Q. I can feel my second marriage is failing again.My husband refused to make love, he doesn't want me touching him and his excuse is being ticklish.He won't discuss things as he always said I want to start arguments.I was badly hurt from my previous ...
A. 24 October 2009: I'm hoping your age range is incorrect... 18-21 seems to be young to have a second marriage that is showing signs of failing.. If it is correct, I can see some reasons why it is failing.. you are looking for the wrong type of guys and falling hard ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend wants oral, but I have memories of being forced...
Q. I am 19 years old now, and have met a guy I really like. He wants me to move in with him, and I am really looking forward to it. But I am really troubled about it to. Since living with my Mom at home, I have had the excuse not to do to much sex ...
A. 24 October 2009: Personally, I think you need to find a rape support center so you can talk about this to someone with much more experience.
But I will say one thing beyond that, you need to realize that your boyfriend is not this older,smelly fat bald guy. You... (read in full...)
Is my boss looking for action or just playing?
Q. I work in a place that as long as customers aren't around we don't act very professional. One of my managers seems to have taken a fancy for me. He talks alot to me, bumps into me alot or touches me (hair... side... back, nothing crude). But he al...
A. 24 October 2009: You use the phrase... "nothing crude" and yet he has a lot of crude behavior.. saying that you've flashed him, tried to get you to flash him and said that you';ve had hot and heavy sex... That alone is sexual harrassment... not to mention the ... (read in full...)
I don't want to causing cheating, but I'm still in love with my best friend...
Q. I have known my best friend for 2 years now, starting freshmen year of college. He is now my roommate. We hung out every day, have many inside jokes, nicknames, and we used to say I love you. We never really went out because we had communication ...
A. 24 October 2009: Is he still seeing this other girl? It seems his relationship may be done or in trouble since he has been spending more time with you and your other roommate... but in the end, you are better off not taking it forward until the relationship is ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend wants to immediately end sex after an orgasm?
Q. my gf wants to immediatley end sex after she orgasms. what should i do? ...
A. 24 October 2009: orgasm first...
but what you really need to do, is talk to her about it and communicate your issues.. relationships should be based on communication.. if you already are communicating it with her, then you may need to reanaalyze your relation... (read in full...)
How do I deal with this girl I got pregnant? She won't stop hanging around me.
Q. Yeah I kinda did it with my little sisters best friend awhile back, couple of months, and now she says she's pregnant and wont stop hanging around me like im her boyfriend. Im perfectly willing to help raise and pay for the kid and everything b...
A. 24 October 2009: You shouldn't have stuck your pen in someone else's pot to begin with and now you need to deal with the consequences, whether she actually is pregnant or just claiming to be so.. and have you told your girlfriend of 2 or less months the whole ... (read in full...)
Do I play his game or just let this go?
Q. my ex and i started talking after i reached out to him after a year and with him knowing i want to try to work things out and also that i cant just be friends. He said we will exchange calls and then meet we have been talking for almost two month...
A. 24 October 2009: I think you may be over-reacting a little bit by calling it a game on his part.. You are the one who wants to get back together, but he may not feel the same about the relationship and may be busy doing other things, or doesn't want to face what he ... (read in full...)
Why did he have to call his ex about my STD?
Q. I recently broke it off with a guy I was seeing LDR for 7 months. I got myself tested since I always want a clean break from everything before dating again, and found out I had Gonorrhea. I never had symptoms which was weird. I told my ex about it ...
A. 24 October 2009: Maybe he's not as clean as he said he was and thought maybe his ex gave it to him which gave it to you?
But this brings up an interesting point.. you said you get tested at the end of your relationships, but do you have your soon-to-be partner ... (read in full...)
Why do I always seem to want sex when I'm a virgin?
Q. Why do I always seem to be wanting sex even though I am a virgin? When I was grinding with a guy and I felt his boner I was about to explode, why? And another guy that I was grinding with had his hands by my bladder a little lower and that made me ...
A. 19 October 2009: Simple solution to your problem is to stop grinding, or simulating sex with others... Remove the temptation before you fall and regret it later.. because the way you are going is that this temptation will get the best of you and next thing you know ... (read in full...)
I want to sleep with my girl friend...how can I convince my husband to share?
Q. I have been married for 14 years to a wonderful man that I am very much in love with. However after I got married I realized that I was bisexual. About ten years ago I had a girlfriend that he knew about and I loved her very much. At that time he ...
A. 19 October 2009: Let me ask you this... How would you feel if your husband came up to you and said he found another girlfriend and wanted to sleep with her but didn't want to share her with you, would you be ok with that?
That is the same situation.. it's jus... (read in full...)
I feel as though I've lost my morals...what should I do?
Q. I hate who i am becoming and i can't stop myself. I used to be the classy girl with a lot of respect for herself, but in a month and a little it has changed. I lost my virginity three years ago now and in the space of three years i had only slept wi...
A. 19 October 2009: The first step to recovery is admitting that you have a problem.. You have reached the first step. Secondly, you need to figure out why you are doing this... that is the only way that you are going to be able to figure out a way to stop it. If you ... (read in full...)
Could he have recorded me on skype?
Q. I am wondering whether anyone knows whether when on Skype the other person viewing a video recording can record you to look at later on etc. I met a guy on Oasis at the beginning of this year who has been harassing me for the last week to get on S...
A. 19 October 2009: Anything on any computer can be recorded. If Skype itself does not allow things to be recorded there are programs out there that can get a video screencap. Just google "video screen capture" and you'll see a variety of methods out there. or if it ... (read in full...)
Do you think my sexual past is a bad thing?
Q. Im 17 and ive slept with 9 guys and 1 girl, would you say its bad? Youngest guy has been 13 when i was 13, and oldest has been 40 when i was 17. Alot of people say its bad, but im not sure, personally i dont think its bad, the only thing that bothe...
A. 14 July 2009: 10 partners in 4 years, I will say that is a lot, but like age that count is just a number and different people will think differently with that count..
My biggest concern is that you get carried away and don't use protection. If you plan on ... (read in full...)
I get performance anxiety when sleeping with someone for the first time. Would Viagra help? Should I try it?
Q. i get really bad performance anxiety when im with someone new for the first time. it stops me getting an ersction. ive met a girl and feel like im really falling for her. would it be a good idea to use viagra for the first time I sleep with her? I ...
A. 13 July 2009: If you are planning on using Viagra, I recommend that you talk to your *offline* doctor first and do not rely on the internet to give you any information about it and how it will react in your body. ... (read in full...)
Is he serious or just joking?
Q. My boyfriend of a year and a half has, in the past, said multiple times that my friends are wh*res, n*ggers, and handfuls of other derogatory names because of some threat that they pose to him. I am not friends with bad people, I am not friends...
A. 13 July 2009: You need to get rid of this abusive relationship. Even if he never has hit you, he is being emoitional abusive not only to you but also your friends..
The most likely reason your friends are backing away is not to not cause any problems nor is i... (read in full...)
He's not as rich or young as my family would like!
Q. I'm in a relationship with a significate age difference (legal) and a very noticable class difference. If anyone has been in or is in either of these types of relationships, I'd would love any advice on making this easier. Being on the upperclass ...
A. 13 July 2009: Age and class rank should not matter in love nowadays.. You love who you love and of course there will always be hurdles here and there.. Your family may just warm up to him later on.. but there really isn't much anyone can advise you on besides ... (read in full...)
Married, cheating and pregnant...
Q. I have been married for the past 7 years. My husband cheated on me and left me briefly for another women. While he was off cheating i started a relationship with an old friend that i've alway had feelings for. Then my husband came back into the ...
A. 13 July 2009: Personally, I would say you need to leave your husband and be with the other guy you care about, especially if he is in fact as you say is definitely the father. I have no sympathy for your husband because he decided to leave you for another woman ... (read in full...)
My bf is annoyed I wont talk to my father about birth control, who's right?
Q. I hope someone can help me out. I'm so confused. Sorry its so long, but you have to understand the whole story to answer the questions. I'm almost sixteen years old, and me and my boyfriend have been dating for almost a year. I never really fo...
A. 12 July 2009: Just to clear up something.. No birth control method is 100% even if you combine them.. By combining birth control methods, you are just hoping the backup plan doesn't fail as well.. If pills have 1 out of 10 times at failing and condoms have a 1 ... (read in full...)
I don't like anal sex and my boyfriend is being an ass about it
Q. i have a problem with my boyfriend, he stated that i don't agree we have anal sex then this proves i don't love him that much ,,, but i tried it and i hate it hurts alot and i don't get it it's not like we can't have sex other wise , now i don't ...
A. 12 July 2009: He's saying that you don't love him because you won't have anal sex? That is very easy to turn around.. You can easily tell him that he doesn't love you because you are trying to force you into something you don't want to do and feel pain ... (read in full...)
Unusal signs and symptoms after unprotected sex, what do you think?
Q. hello, i hope you lot can help me. i very recently had unprotected sex (within the last week) and since then i've experienced some strange symptoms; one of the main ones is that i keep getting this strange sensation in my stomach it's sort of a t...
A. 12 July 2009: Keep in mind that you should not dismiss pregnancy because you saw some blood, especially a tiny amount, because implantation can cause a little bit of bleeding and same goes further along where you may still see some blood..
On the other ha... (read in full...)
I got irresponsibly drunk, had sex and my parents want to sue him
Q. i kinda got raped. i cant explain but i can try. i was drunk. i passed out , was consantly throwing up, but continued drinking. he carried me into his room. i was awake, i didntr say no but i didnt say yes either. im 16 and he is 22. my parents ...
A. 12 July 2009: Suing or pursuing charges? I hope it's the later because suing him just makes them look like they're hungry for money. But the state in which you were in, that is defined as rape in many cases regardless if you said yes or no because you were not in ... (read in full...)
Should I still worry if I'm pregnant?
Q. We almost did it last June 1, the tip of his penis sort of entered the tip of my vagina, the upper tip part. I got my period on that month, it wasn't late or whatsoever. But i can't help but worry. I need help, advice. Should i still worry? I'm ...
A. 12 July 2009: Well even if he had the tip of his penis inside of you, you can become pregnant regardless if he cums in you or not.. but seeing that it was June 1st and you had your period later that month, I would say you are probably not pregnant.. though ... (read in full...)
Ok to have sex? We're not related by blood
Q. ok well i have a HALF brother (we have the same dad but not the same mom)and i hang out with a lot of his family on his MOM's side (so they have no relation to me at ALL) and he has a cousin on his mom's side that i am attracted to. i am just ...
A. 12 July 2009: Family ties may be a problem whether there is blood or not involved.. but it really depends on how the family will view it and even if she/he is interested in you at all. I mean, how does she/he feel about you.. are they interested in havign a ... (read in full...)
Should I quit my job to prevent an affair?
Q. Im 27 and have the hugest crush on 1 of my reps. He's married and im engaged.We often go out out as a group and get on so well. People at work notice we have a "spark". I went on holiday 2 months ago to St Lucia for 2 weeks and the whole time i...
A. 11 July 2009: Learn some self-control. You need to learn to get a grasp on your emotions.. first off, I think the first thing you should consider is if you should cancel your engagement because you seem to have a taste of love beyond the guy you are planning on ... (read in full...)
Is this line true?
Q. Is this line true? "Don't trust guys with two first names."...
A. 11 July 2009: I've always heard that line to mean having a last name that is normally used for a first name.. "ron paul" would be a good example.. or from the show Newsradio.."Jimmy James" or Jesse James...
But I say it's a falsehood because people are who they... (read in full...)
My eyes are too dark....
Q. I have always been a tough girl. I don't mind being girly. I love love love bows and color, but I am not sure about something. My boyfriend says he likes blue eyes, he says it a lot. I have brown eyes... I am asian so they are sorta dark. How can I ...
A. 11 July 2009: If your boyfriend likes blue eyes, I would take a gander that he shouldn't be looking to date an asian girl. I haven't seen many if any asian girls with blue eyes.. er natural blue eyes.. I would say to you to not try to please your bf on his quest ... (read in full...)
He keeps going into chatrooms, why?
Q. Hello everyone, I've been with my bf for 2 years, we have a child together. Lately i noticed him going into chatrooms.. what does this mean? ...
A. 11 July 2009: When you say chatrooms, it will be best to describe what kind of chatrooms he may be going into.. it could be as innocent as an auto repair chatroom, a sports club chatroom and a variety of other chatrooms that exist that don't deal with hooking up ... (read in full...)
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