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How to give better advice..

This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

6 November 2009: This is a follow-up to my article on "how to get good advice" located at http://www.dearcupid.org/question/how-to-get-good-advice.html This time I am going to delve into the area on how to give good or better advice to those who are seeking it. ...

Playing with Statistics of Chance

No replies yet...

21 March 2009: After reading a lot of "What are my chances.." type questions, I figured I'd delve into the little aspect of statistics of chance. A guy named Aaron Levenstein once said, "Statistics are like bikinis. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they ...

How to get good advice?

This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

26 February 2009: You ask for someone's advice and expect to get good advice back, what do you do? You tell them your story and expect to get a good response back. Do you always get it? Sometimes yes, sometimes no. There are a variety of steps you need to consider to ...

Do these boots make my butt look big and the lies we tell.

This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

10 February 2009: LIES! All of us tell lies from time to time. Sometimes small innocent lies, sometimes big giant lies. Some lies save us from being yelled at by our partners and others make our partners scream at us. Why do we do it? Can we not just get by not ...

< Prev1234567891011Next > [15 pages, 545 answers]

He keeps going into chatrooms, why?

Q.   Hello everyone, I've been with my bf for 2 years, we have a child together. Lately i noticed him going into chatrooms.. what does this mean? ...

A.   11 July 2009: When you say chatrooms, it will be best to describe what kind of chatrooms he may be going into.. it could be as innocent as an auto repair chatroom, a sports club chatroom and a variety of other chatrooms that exist that don't deal with hooking up ... (read in full...)

Is there any way to find out who the father is before the baby is born?

Q.   Ok here is my problem, I just have discovered that I am pregnant but the problem is, I don't know who the father would be. Two weeks ago I had unprotected sex with a really close friend, and then about 5 days later I got back together with an ex and ...

A.   10 July 2009: There are methods of telling who is the father even before giving birth. But my guess would be that the father is whoever you had sex with before 2 weeks ago.. Because most people don't really realize they are pregnant until later.. unless you ... (read in full...)

I'm 15, pregnant and don't know how to tell my mom!

Q.   I am 15 years old and I have only been dating my boyfriend for a week. But we have been messing around for 2 months and I just currently found out that I was pregnant. I'm not to sure what to do or what to think I have no job I am homeschooled a...

A.   10 July 2009: well at least you can get some hand me downs from your mother's new baby.. But in the end, you are going to have to tell her about your situation and let her know what you are going through. She might possibly be a little upset, but in the end ... (read in full...)

Is her new guy a bandaid or is she playing mindgames with me?

Q.   So, my girlfriend and I of two years broke up. the last year we were living together. We got into a fight and she left the house didn't come home that night. first time she ever did that in a fight. everything was going good the weeks before. I ...

A.   4 July 2009: I think that you are personally forgetting about her, move on and stop contact with her.. She cheated on you and even if she changed her mind, she is still with that other guy while trying to get you back. I don't think anyone is worth going after ... (read in full...)

Irregularities with my period make me worry I might be pregnant after unprotected sex, what should I do?

Q.   I had unprotected sex on May 25, 2009 and I got my period expectedly on June 18, 2009. But it wasn't normal; it was very light and all of the blood was brown. Now it is July 3, 2009 and I just got my period again but now my period is normal. I'm ...

A.   4 July 2009: First, I will say that if you are not ready to be a mother stop having sex and more importantly stop having unprotected sex. But beyond that and how you'd describe it, I'd say chances are that you are not... but there is a chance you might be... (read in full...)

He makes legal threats to people on Wiki !

Q.   I found out on the computer that my husband has been making legal threats to others on Wikipedia under multiple usernames. I confronted him, and he denied it at first, but then admitted it. He said he got a buzz out of winding them up. All h...

A.   3 July 2009: You need to tell your husband to stop this behavior because in the end he's going to make the two of you outcasts or worse yet be at the end of someone taking legal action against you. Legal actions beget other legal actions.. One day he will make a ... (read in full...)

Friend is saying stuff behind my back, is this a good friend?

Q.   Okay I'm not gonna mention real names so the friend I'm disliking will be "A" and the friend I like will be friend "B" and I'm "M" Okay so I sent my boyfriend a "naughty" picture and I know it was wrong, and illegal, but I don't want to hear tha...

A.   3 July 2009: You consider A your friend? I think that the friendship ship had set sail ages ago without the both of you in it. and I would question Friend B why she even told friend A about it.. But in the end, it's just a fight of jealousy and in the end A ... (read in full...)

If a guy loses erection during sex, is it the woman's fault?

Q.   Guys and ladies please I need your pespective! My ex bragged that it was my fault he lost his erections while we had sex. Lets keep in mind that all this time he teased me by saying that I am a saint to others and a horny bit*ch in bed. Guys, can a ...

A.   3 July 2009: I wouldn't worry about this too much because he's just upset that you told his girlfriend that he was cheating on her and his girlfriend is just in denial of that fact and is taking out the frustration on you.. It's best that you just distance ... (read in full...)

Can you teach someone to treat you the way you want to be treated?

Q.   Can you teach someone to treat you the way you want to be treated?....Or is that the typical trap we women fall into, thinking a man is going to change for us?....My boyfriend has many great qualities, but doesn't really respect women in general. ...

A.   3 July 2009: There are always two sides to every story and what you are saying might be true or it could be a complete overexaggeration, so I'm not going to judge your current boyfriend. Keep in mind, i'm not calling you a liar, but people do have a trend to ... (read in full...)

Does this look like I have an STD?

Q.   I have had a tingling feeling in my genital area and legs all week. I have these tiny open sores all on the left side of my vaginal area. I think I may have herpes. I am planning on seeing a doctor but can't until monday due to the holiday. in the ...

A.   3 July 2009: Kind of sounds like herpes or some sort of STD, but then again it could always be something totally different. Only a doctor will be able to tell you for sure. But if you are asking this that way, I'm guessing you are sexually active and have reason ... (read in full...)

Why do guys only want me sexually?

Q.   Its kind of annoying, I am 22 years old and I just want to be in a relationship (one day that is). I do not have any experience when it comes to dating and its like...no one wants to take a look at my "resume" I am extremely quiet, shy, kind...but I ...

A.   3 July 2009: Thanks for helping me clear that up some, GinsengMeow.. But it is somewhat right that men can be more physical and women more emotional, but it does not mean that men throw out everything that is mental, nor do women toss out everything that ... (read in full...)

Why do guys only want me sexually?

Q.   Its kind of annoying, I am 22 years old and I just want to be in a relationship (one day that is). I do not have any experience when it comes to dating and its like...no one wants to take a look at my "resume" I am extremely quiet, shy, kind...but I ...

A.   2 July 2009: Not all guys are only physical, it may see that they all are, but you are not looking towards the right ones or only the wrong ones come up to you. I have a feeling you need to step out of your mindset where you think all guys want is sex. It's not ... (read in full...)

Did I just throw 5 years away?

Q.   Ok, please help me find some kind of relief from this. I am beyond stressed right now. About a week ago, I broke up with my boyfriend of five years. I felt it was the best thing for me to do because I had issues with him not being able to co...

A.   1 July 2009: Don't look at this as you throwing 5 years away.. Think of it as gaining the life ahead of yourself. You want to be married and have children, and all he wants is a lifetime girlfriend with no strings or children... Live that for 50 years and you'll ... (read in full...)

I cheated on my boyfriend, but he still wants to be with me, do I?

Q.   I am in a relationship for 2 years and i cheated on my boyfriend.I slept with someone else and i did it thrice.He is an angel and he has accepted me.I confessed my mistake to him and now i want to be very nice and want to love him from all my ...

A.   27 May 2009: I have my doubts that you really want to be with him. I think you are only staying with him on the sole reason because he wants to be with you. You should not stay in a relationship just because the other person wants to be with you. You should be ... (read in full...)

Rumors! But am I the father or is he?

Q.   Here's the deal. My wife is pregnant. We've been together for a year, and for the most part, it's been a good year. Like most people, she has her share of history, and I have mine. While this may sound like some of that, it's really not, at least I ...

A.   27 May 2009: If these are jokes, they are very untasteful jokes and have no place in business nor with any friends of your wife's. You need to let your wife know that these jokes are inapproiate and lessens you as the father of the child especially if you ever ... (read in full...)

LA? Or New York?

Q.   I know this istnt a family or relationship based question, but i would very much like ur advice on this matter. It has always been my dream to go to the USA ever since i was a mid teenager and basically I want to see big city america as to ge...

A.   25 May 2009: I would say NYC might be easier to get around in if you don't have a car.. L.A. pretty would require you to get a car.. Though there are plenty of things and plenty of places out in LA, though like I said, you'd need a car.... (read in full...)

10 year sexual affair with my cousin...

Q.   My second cousin and I have been having a secret sexual relationship for about ten years now. The first time we had sex is when I was 14 and she was 13. Now I am 24 and she is 23 years old. We usually used birth control (Condoms) but ab...

A.   23 May 2009: I somewhat agree with a previous poster about risks in regards to second cousins.. I would say the risks are minimal, but it does raise the risk somewhat higher if recessive bad traits get mixed in. But any 2 people in the general public can create ... (read in full...)

Bad boys verses gentlemen...

Q.   all i have ever come across is players and bad boys that only want me for sex and never treat me right. Recently i started dating a guy and i was genuinely shocked! He wines and dines me, wants to meet up to go out during the day (not just textin...

A.   23 May 2009: Good thing I'm married now to a wonderful woman, otherwise this question will make me depressed because that's all I have seen during my dating life.. Hearing girls saying how much they hated their boyfriends because they werent treating them right ... (read in full...)

Sex with a non-blood related aunt

Q.   is it incest to have sex with aunt who is not your blood type. ...

A.   23 May 2009: First of all, how old is your aunt? It's easy to assume she is way older than you, but there are a lot of circumstances that can make your non-blood aunt the same age or younger than you, just as there are ways to have a blood aunt to be younger ... (read in full...)

The worst haircut of my life! How do I tell her?

Q.   my friend who is in beauty school (almost done) , cut my hair the other day. she did such a bad job, what makes it worse she loves it. my husband said it kind of looks like an 80s mullet, :/ my mom just said omg. i called my cousin who has been a ...

A.   23 May 2009: This is why I don't do business with friends or family.. :) but seriously.. you need to sit her down and let her know.. People need to know about their mistakes, otherwise they will continue making them because they think they are doing things right ... (read in full...)

Pregnant - Having Issues with Boyfriend's Friends

Q.   Recently I just found out I’m pregnant – My boyfriend and his whole family are very excited. The problem is there are two of his guy friends that have been creating some problems. They tell him to change his number or how does he know that he is the ...

A.   20 May 2009: You may be in between a rock and a hard place depending on how close he is to these "friends." Personally, I would talk to him and ask him how he feels about his "friends" saying what they are saying.. It will not do you any good to say that he ... (read in full...)

Age..just a number?

Q.   i really like this guy- but hes 24 and i'm 14. i know i have to get over it, but i just can't! i try so hard but it doesn't work. I see him all the time, and he acts like its a joke that i'm in love with him when we're around other people, but when ...

A.   3 May 2009: Of course you aren't worried about the age thing because the stigma will be focused on him for dating such a young girl. We will be the outcast, the pedaphile, the person breaking the law, whereas you will only be the victim, the naive little girl ... (read in full...)

Dating and I feel trapped like I can't be myself

Q.   I'm new to the whole dating thing. I have my first real boyfriend! And I love it, I love him. But there is one thing that I don't get....y do I feel kinda trapped like I can't be the same person. I am a really big flirt so it feels really different ...

A.   3 May 2009: First tip I will give you is to be yourself.. If you try to be someone else you will end up frustrated and of course the other party will fall out of love with you because you are not the same person you were when you guys met.. of course if you ... (read in full...)

I don't want my boyfriend to go to jail...

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been together for five months now - since about a week before he and his ex broke up. They were together for two years and I'll admit, he was not the nicest guy towards his ex. For two years, he emotionally and physically ...

A.   3 May 2009: DO NOT COMMIT PERJURY for this guy.. You do know that you can land yourself in jail for doing this, right? You shouldn't be willing to perjure yourself to get this guy off.. If he is asking you to do this, then I would have no doubt in my mind that ... (read in full...)

Selfish one night stand. Could I get pregnant?

Q.   Ok the other night I decided to go to out with my sister and ended up finding a cute guy.So anyways took him back home was drunk and horny and slept with him using no protection and I am not on any type of bc,I told him that. He never came in me a...

A.   7 April 2009: My rule of thumb is that if you don't want to become pregnant, you are more likely to become pregnant than someone who is trying, but that is just a non-scientific theory that has never been tested or proven.. That being said. Yes, there are odds... (read in full...)

Will she get pregnant?

Q.   My fiance isn't on any birth control, but I have been pulling out before ejaculating.. How likely is it that she could get pregnant?...

A.   5 April 2009: Have fun with statistics... http://www.dearcupid.org/question/playing-with-statistics-of-chance.html Seriously, I'm not going to give you a number because 99% is way too high and 30% maybe as well.. But even if the chance is 1% which is 1 out of ... (read in full...)

Pregnant and tired...He thinks I am lazy

Q.   Hello everyone... I just need some advice. I'm 7 months pregnant and over the past two weeks or so I feel extremely fatigued. I also just recently moved into an apartment with my boyfriend. I'm a full time student and he works to support the both...

A.   5 April 2009: I cannot comment too much on how it feels to be 7 months pregnant since it's physically impossible for me to become pregnant, but I see how my wife is in about 3 months... But if he is demanding that you carry groceries home and laundry, he is be... (read in full...)

He proposed to me, but is it too early for marriage?

Q.   My boyfriend and I met nine months ago at my freshman orientation. He was a volunteer going into his sophomore year in college. We started dating a day after that and he proposed yesterday. I told him I would have to think about it for a couple days ...

A.   5 April 2009: I've seen people who get married after only 3 months that have great marriages and others who have been together for years before marriage but have horrible marriages. You just need to figure out if this is the man you want to spend the rest of your ... (read in full...)

Told him to delete my number. Did I do the right thing?

Q.   If my bf said he needed a break, but the ext day i see him with another girl, so i tell him to delete my # of his fone... was that the rite thing to do?...

A.   5 April 2009: I'd say that you did the right thing. He needed a break, because he found another girl and he wants to see if that works without risking losing you. I wouldn't stand around and be his insurance policy when things don't work out with his new girl ... (read in full...)

My husband has impregnated a girl twice during our marriage!

Q.   Should i stay with my spouse after i have forgiven him twice for impreganating **PERSON-A**,who happened to miscarry on both occassion. I gave birth to our daughter (**PERSON-B**) three months ago and he is now telling me that **PERSON-A** had a ...

A.   28 March 2009: Fixed it Satin.. ;) I wouldn't go by the saying the third time is a charm in this instance. You already gave him 2 chances to correct his digressions but he continues doing them with **Person-A**. You have **Person-B** to take care of and she shou... (read in full...)

Should I leave my wife for this other women and risk end up being alone?

Q.   I am in a 20 years marriage that has lasted 10 yrs too long. I have been seeing another woman twice a month for 2 years. I don't want to hurt my wife, but I'm not in love w/her anymore. The other woman loves me, but is married w/three kids. She ...

A.   28 March 2009: If you don't love your wife, I don't think you should stay. You are dealing with her unjustly. But before you do anything rash, I would look back and try to find out what made you lose love for her and see if you can fix it before you do something ... (read in full...)

I'm wondering if I should break up with my girlfriend...

Q.   Hello, I have been in a relationship for a year with my girlfriend. My girlfriend is a waitress. I recently moved in with her 2 months ago. Everything was going great but then she left her myspace open so i looked at it and saw that she was talking ...

A.   28 March 2009: I don't think there is a big problem other than the fact that she loves you how you are even if she thinks you are very uneducated. I don't see any problem with her having lunch or a bite to eat with this guy considering that there is nothing ... (read in full...)

He won't go out with me because I'm "flat chested" Grrrrr

Q.   Well basically, I am 14 and I am not fully 'developed' yet. Like I haven't started my period and my boobs are basically like mosquito bites. This is because my mum developed really late. She didn't start her period til she was 16 but the annoying ...

A.   26 March 2009: I think us aunts are forgetting that we aren't dealing with a man, let alone a real man.. :) We are dealing with young people, who can be more prone to peer pressure.. I have a feeling that this is more the problem with this lad.. He is probably ... (read in full...)

She deleted messages to other guys "by mistake!!!" Hmmmmmm...

Q.   I am getting married in a few months, I have been with her for over 4 years and love her with all of my heart but the other day I was on her computer and found some messages that she had sent to other guys and I decided to read what they had talked ...

A.   26 March 2009: I would definitely be highly suspiscous of these "accidently" deleted emails, because you saw them once before and some of them gave you very good reason to think she was cheating on you, and then you confront her about them and she accidently ... (read in full...)

Never had sex and my period is late

Q.   I'm 20 years old. I have never had sex before. My period is late. What do you think?...

A.   26 March 2009: Define what having no sex means to you.. If you are talking about only the part where the penis gets inserted to you vagina, then you can still get pregnant by other means if say that you were dry humping and you were naked but he was in his boxers ... (read in full...)

Why does my friend have 2 boyfriends when I cant even get 1??

Q.   My friend has had 2 boyfriends for over a year now and its really not fair because I cant even get one. I've been told that I'm really attractive but guys just want to sleep with me and nothing else. And I dont sleep around, I make the guy wait a wh...

A.   25 March 2009: Well if you wanted to, you can beat your friend and have 3 boyfriends, all you need to do is have sex with them. But I would highly NOT recommend doing that. Just stay your course and find the guy who wants to know you mentally and not just phy... (read in full...)

I'm a young female adult who has become wary about my pubic mound!

Q.   I'm a young female adult who has become wary about my pubic mound. I never thought about it too much but became paranoid once my mum pointed out that it sticks out, after that I've noticed that it's different to others and is noticable. Is it normal ...

A.   25 March 2009: Personally, there is nothing wrong with a bigger mound.. I actually find it to be a turn on... But each to their own. In the end, I really didn't marry my wife on how she looks but how she acts and treats me.... (read in full...)

Is it normal for guys to keep adding girls on their facebook list?

Q.   hi everyone i am sort of worried about my boyfriend of 1 year.is it normal for guys to keep adding girls (they don't even know at all) on their facebook list? is it like one of those "cool" wannabe things or what?its really getting on my nerves now...

A.   25 March 2009: I wouldn't be too paranoid about this,.. People love to feel like they have a lot of friends even though they aren't really friends but people who joined their network. People on these social networks tend to play the game of who has the most ... (read in full...)

Should my baby have my last name?

Q.   I have a baby with my boyfriend he doesn't plan on getting married to me. In fact he's already married to another woman. Their relationship is rocky and he wants a child to have his last name even though we're not married. Should my baby have my ...

A.   25 March 2009: I'm going to tell you this.. Give your child, your last name. This guy does not deserve the ability to have your child to bear his last name. You can officially tell him to go pound sand. He has no plans to marry you and you are probably just a s... (read in full...)

I've been sneaking around having sex with him and now I want his baby

Q.   I have been having sex with this guy, who has a kid who I believe is around the age of 4 or 5 with a woman and he is an excellent father, the kid likes him better than the mother. He is not married to her but still lives with her he has been living ...

A.   25 March 2009: "he wants it to stay like that so he can keep getting more. so what does that mean exactly?" It means that he wants to continue having you for sex while he probably is getting some from her as well. You need to re-read what you just wrote and figu... (read in full...)

What do I do to make her leave him and me alone?

Q.   ok im 17 and i'm pregnant. my boyfriend of 2 years who got me pregnant is 28 and there is a huge problem and it's not the age gap its his ex girlfriend. he has a 3 year old daughter by his ex girlfriend and his 3 year old daughter looks nothing ...

A.   24 March 2009: If he doesn't believe that the kid is his, then you need to get him to take a dna test. If it's his, then you are stuck with his babymama drama... If it's not his, then you can get her out of your life. I would also recommend moving. This ... (read in full...)

I've been sneaking around having sex with him and now I want his baby

Q.   I have been having sex with this guy, who has a kid who I believe is around the age of 4 or 5 with a woman and he is an excellent father, the kid likes him better than the mother. He is not married to her but still lives with her he has been living ...

A.   24 March 2009: So if you only see him for sex when the other girl is at work and the kid is in school for 3 hours.. if you get pregnant, when will he have time for your child? It sure does not sound like a great situation to bring a child into this world.. ... (read in full...)

I've been sneaking around having sex with him and now I want his baby

Q.   I have been having sex with this guy, who has a kid who I believe is around the age of 4 or 5 with a woman and he is an excellent father, the kid likes him better than the mother. He is not married to her but still lives with her he has been living ...

A.   24 March 2009: Do you really think he is good father material? I would have a hard time believing that because he is probably spending a lot of time going out on dates with you and drinking with his buddies, not to mention the time at work, than to really take ... (read in full...)

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