| Latest articles: How to give better advice..
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
6 November 2009: This is a follow-up to my article on "how to get good advice" located at http://www.dearcupid.org/question/how-to-get-good-advice.html This time I am going to delve into the area on how to give good or better advice to those who are seeking it. ...
Playing with Statistics of Chance
No replies yet... 21 March 2009: After reading a lot of "What are my chances.." type questions, I figured I'd delve into the little aspect of statistics of chance. A guy named Aaron Levenstein once said, "Statistics are like bikinis. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they ...
How to get good advice?
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 February 2009: You ask for someone's advice and expect to get good advice back, what do you do? You tell them your story and expect to get a good response back. Do you always get it? Sometimes yes, sometimes no. There are a variety of steps you need to consider to ...
Do these boots make my butt look big and the lies we tell.
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
10 February 2009: LIES! All of us tell lies from time to time. Sometimes small innocent lies, sometimes big giant lies. Some lies save us from being yelled at by our partners and others make our partners scream at us. Why do we do it? Can we not just get by not ...
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Things you should never say to your girlfriend
Q. We all heard of that idiot how called his gf fat and got dump. But why do we keep doing it? It could be he isn't aren't aware of how disrespectful it can be? Or could it be he just like making her cry? It could be lot of reason. So think before you ...
A. 1 March 2009: Things you shouldn't say to your boyfriend:
1. Do these jeans look fat on me?
see http://www.dearcupid.org/question/do-these-boots-make-my-butt-look-big.html
2. Oh, He's just a friend.
You're not fooling us. A new guy just doesn't pop out... (read in full...)
In love with my friend that have rejected a lot of boys
Q. There's a lot going wrong in my life right now. I'm in love with one of my friends. I know that it's not going to work out because I'm kind of quiet and awkward and she's rejected guys more attractive and popular than me. So what should I do? I...
A. 1 March 2009: There's no hope for this relationship, if you do not do anything about it. If you like her so much, you need to step out on that ledge and take the plunge and tell her how much you like her and that you want to have a relationship with her. You need ... (read in full...)
Dad wants to put me up for adoption because I'm wild!
Q. My dad and i have a far strung relationship but i dont turn to him alot anymore ever since i started 'Developing' he thinks that im up to no good no matter what. I have guy friends and we hang out like we're all guys we even play football together. ...
A. 1 March 2009: Jessica04 gave really good advice. I think you need to talk to your father. Communication is key.. You need to reassure him that you are still his little angel and that you will do things to stay out of trouble. He is just worried about you and ... (read in full...)
I am 15 and want to have a baby!
Q. I want to keep having sex....i was 14 when i started to and now 15 and want a baby. I really want to have one but my mom don't want me to i wanna fellow my own desires...
A. 1 March 2009: I think you need to rethink your desire to have a baby. You may think you are ready, but you are not. You need to grow up and get yourself settled before you decide to have this baby. Having a baby may sound great, but once your pregnant things will ... (read in full...)
Is it dirty to love giving my b/f a blow job?
Q. Is it dirty to love giving me boyfriend a blow job. Sometimes i just fantasize bout turning him on and giving him one say in a dressing room when we r out shopping. I just love giving him one and how it makes him feel and me. He says i turn him on ...
A. 1 March 2009: It's only dirty if you feel that it is dirty. There is really nothing dirty about giving your lover a blowjob, unless maybe they have an STD. But you shouldn't let society guilt you into thinking sex is dirty.... (read in full...)
Could she be pregnant even with us using a condom?
Q. hi to all of you out there. well me and my g/f had sex on the 24th and we used a brand new condom and i came inside her with the condom on my penis. could she be pregnant even thought the condom didnt break or it didnt have any leakage. this morning ...
A. 1 March 2009: Well the only thing i can suggest that you should do, is buy her a pregnancy test to find out. That's pretty much all you can do except worry.... (read in full...)
My girl slept with someone else while we were on a 'break' and I cant get over it
Q. Heres the deal, my girlfriend of 4yrs and I had a break that lasted a month during the summer, during which we saw other people. When we got back together, I asked her if she had slept with anyone, to which she replied no.Recently she told me that ...
A. 28 February 2009: Reminds me of the TV show "Friends" "We were on a BREAK!"
But anyways, this has to deal with trust. She broke your trust by lying to you, although she may have had good intentions in doing so, however, it would have been better for her to come ... (read in full...)
Is it fun to take pictures? (Why not)
Q. Is it fun to take pictures? (a minor rant) Ok this is something that might seem obvious. We live in a digital age where everything has a camera. Quiet often people think its fun to take pictures of yourself or partners in various poses ranging fr...
A. 28 February 2009: You definitely don't want to take any risky pictures if you don't want to risk them being seen by other people. In the digital age, they can be spread around the internet like wildfire. A file of 0's and 1's can be duplicated many times over and ... (read in full...)
How to Know You ARE Protected
Q. Throughout the time I've spent here at DearCupid, I've seen many questions regarding sex, birth control, pregnancy scares, STIs, and the like. I've spent the past week doing a lot of research, and have finally come up with some things that will ...
A. 28 February 2009: Good article. Although I think you should clarify one aspect of safe sex, and that is sex within a monogamous relationship is safe sex at the point where you know you both are clean of any STD's of course. After that point, you can decide whether to ... (read in full...)
He was all over me, I couldn't go through with it, he called me a lesbian and left.
Q. I am totally inexperienced but have been curious for about a year and a half. Before that time I did not know much about my body and had never dated. I thought I was ready to fulfill my dream of sex. I got a date with a fraternity guy who is very ...
A. 28 February 2009: Perhaps this experience should make you realize that you should slow down on your dream to have sex. What this guy did was jerkish. Did you really want to lose your virginity to him? I think you are better off waiting for your special guy, whe... (read in full...)
Pregnancy cramps - is this normal or should I consult a different doctor?
Q. please don't tell me to ask my doctor about this because i have and she didn't give me an answer. i was wondering if any other pregnant women have had cramps and felt there abdomen harden. i know that's a sign of it contracting, but i get it once or ...
A. 28 February 2009: If you cannot trust your doctor, always remember that you may always go see another doctor just for a second opinion without needing to change doctors. Perhaps if you do that, you might find a doctor that you are more comfortable with as well.... (read in full...)
Am I supposed to wait for her or say to heck with it?
Q. Last June my best friend got married. As bestman i escorted the Brides cousin down the isle. During the rehearsal and wedding we had so much fun. we just clicked. We spent all last summer together. weather we were talking on the phone or going out ...
A. 28 February 2009: Sometimes, you need to move on, because if you linger around too long you'll vanish and lead a sad, lonely life. She has moved on, you should too. Maybe she'll come back, but maybe she won't and if she won't and you move on... you don't have to ... (read in full...)
Why do I have a problem with the fact she's not a virgin?
Q. Hi. My girlfriend's 17, and we get along really well. We've only been dating for about a month, and everything's happy fields of candy dandilions, etc. A small sticking point for me though, is the fact that she's not a virgin. I don't know why this ...
A. 28 February 2009: Dump her and go find a virgin or someone who just says that they are is one solution, but well probably not the best solution.
You need to step back and realize that the past is the past. I mean does she expect for you to be a virgin? I'm sure... (read in full...)
I lied to my BF and told him I'm not a virgin - should I tell him the truth?
Q. I'm 13 and so is my boyfriend. I really truly love him but I lied to him about not being a virgin and he believes me. Should I tell him that I am or should it remain a secret ?...
A. 28 February 2009: What is the purpose of telling him that you are not a virgin? What is the thought process, because I am very curious. You are not the first one to ask this recently. Why are you telling them you are not? I mean seriously, lying about that will bring ... (read in full...)
Bad reputation to see 2 guys from my office?
Q. Hey there! Just a quick question. I am separated from my husband and currently going through divorce proceedings. Basically he started sleeping with another woman and I found out about it - so that was that. Anyway since then I started dating a...
A. 28 February 2009: Maybe you shouldn't dip you pen in the company ink. Or have your cake and eat it to..
Personally, in your situation, I would stick with the guy you are with now and forget about the other guy. Both guys have kids, though one has one via a commit... (read in full...)
Why do some girls want to become porn stars?
Q. why do some girls want to be porn stars .why can't they get office jobs?...
A. 27 February 2009: Heck I wish I could become a pornstar and whore out my body.. beats actually working hard for the money I make, but then again... There's a downside I guess of being a pornstar too, but more money involved. Everyone has their price.... (read in full...)
My long term b/f has caught me on several dating sites and left. Shall I forgive him?
Q. My long term bf has caught me in chat rooms and several dating sites over the last 9 months. We argue,like a child he walks out and doesnt come back for a week or so. All i do is harmless flirting and the odd guy i text. We broke up and this time i ...
A. 27 February 2009: Cooking and cleaning for him and not refusing him sex/hugs is not the only component in treating him well, because you CAN still be going out and having sex with other guys while doing all those things too. What you have been doing was having ... (read in full...)
I don't want him to know how inexperienced I am!
Q. I lied to the guy that I fancy, we had a quick snog, I wasn't very good (because I have never done it before), he stopped and asked me what was up, I just said that it had been a while and my last boyfriend wasn't very nice to me and it has made me ...
A. 27 February 2009: So being a virgin is a bad thing nowadays? You should have been straight forward with him. It wouldn't have drove him away.. That is normally one things guys would not mind with.. I'm sure girls would too as well. but anyways.... (read in full...)
Can someone explain erectilve dysfunction?
Q. hi could you tell me wot erectile dysfunction is and why you get it, and wot can be done thanks...
A. 27 February 2009: There are plenty of causes. Some of them have been mentioned, but a major one that a lot of people overlook is the mental aspect of it as well. Correction that has been mentioned under "stress", but if a man is worrying to please the woman too much ... (read in full...)
My ex is causing problems between me and my guy!
Q. I was sleeping with a friend/coworker. My ex came by my house drunk over the weekend. I was drunk too, worried about him driving. Let him into my apartment. ended up going through my phone. Found some questionable texts between me and this other ...
A. 27 February 2009: When good intentions go bad... I commend you for letting your ex stay over when he was drunk. But with that in mind, you should have kept your phone in a safer place, had a phone lock on and kept it as that. But hindsight is 20/20.
But you need... (read in full...)
No proof of cheating?
Q. I have been cheated on multiple times, and emotionally rejected. My best friend went out with my ex basically. And that relationship only lasted 4 years then broke up. Now that I am in a new relationship of 6 years now, I always have a gut feeling ...
A. 27 February 2009: Keep your past in the past otherwise you will end up repeating the past. You cannot let your past drive your current relationship. I been there too where I had an ex that cheated on me. Heck, I even physically caught her in the act. It gets worse ... (read in full...)
Do drunken mistakes really exist?
Q. My boyfriend and I have had a rocky relationship, in which we just went through a period of saving it. We came clean about everything we had done, and he told me he had slept with one of his best friends, who was also living in the room next to him ...
A. 27 February 2009: The only drunken mistake that exists is getting drunk in the first place. Everything that happens afterwards could have been prevented.... (read in full...)
I have been taking birth control, Can I still be pregnant if I still bleed?
Q. In the past few months, since November, I've been sexually active. I'm on birth control and for the most part, I take it at 10 AM everyday. Sometimes it's 1 or 2 o'clock before I remember it, but I only have sex like one weekend out of the month. ...
A. 27 February 2009: Well giving that you are on the pill, that lowers the risk. Although you not taking it regularly(you forget and take it 3-4 hours later) than that increases the risk. Given that not all contraceptives are 100% effective, then yes you may still be ... (read in full...)
Could she be pregnant even with us using a condom?
Q. hi to all of you out there. well me and my g/f had sex on the 24th and we used a brand new condom and i came inside her with the condom on my penis. could she be pregnant even thought the condom didnt break or it didnt have any leakage. this morning ...
A. 27 February 2009: If the 24th, you are talking about is the 24th of February, you should be fine.. If it was January, then that would be a different answer.... (read in full...)
How would she of gotten his email address if he wasn't a member?
Q. i found a email from a girl in my husbands email box that had her email address. she claims to be from adult friend finder and it read this. hey its been like a month or something since we last chatted and I was thinking about you and decided to s...
A. 26 February 2009: Here's how they get your email address. They get them by you handing out your email address to the internet. Whether it be obtained from you signing up for a certain site, or you listing your email address on a public forum. Robots do prowl the web ... (read in full...)
Wearing previous engagement ring
Q. My girlfriend insists on wearing previous engagement rings -- yes, she has a few of them -- when we go out together. When I introduced her to my family, my sister took me aside and asked if I had something to tell her ... of course she drew the ...
A. 26 February 2009: Ok after reading that followup that occured before I wrote my reply that I didn't see because we did it around the same time, I am loosing my stance a little.. I can see a little more to why you may be with her.. This few.. is only 3.. and have some ... (read in full...)
I don't mind if I become pregnant but my fiance is not sold on the idea
Q. Hi everyone. I wonder if anyone can help me here? My fiance proposed to me at the weekend. That night, we consumated the engagement. We didn't realise, until I felt him cumming inside me, that the condom had split. He uses an ultra-thin make so it ...
A. 26 February 2009: Well being pregnant is a pretty scary event, so it could be a variety of reasons. Especially if it's your first child. My wife is currently pregnant with our first child and it's a little nerve-racking but exciting at the same time. But right now, ... (read in full...)
I can't stop snooping because I worry he will cheat, please help me me keep my family!
Q. Hi everyone. I'm going to start off by saying I feel like I have really accepted that part of him, soemtimes anyways. But I just cant stop snooping. I worry all the time that he is cheating, why you ask becuase I was with a guy before him who ...
A. 26 February 2009: You need to relax and calm down with your snooping practices. You clearly mistrust him. You need to step back and start believing in your man and trust him to do the right thing. It can be hard when you've had previous relationships hurt you, but ... (read in full...)
Wearing previous engagement ring
Q. My girlfriend insists on wearing previous engagement rings -- yes, she has a few of them -- when we go out together. When I introduced her to my family, my sister took me aside and asked if I had something to tell her ... of course she drew the ...
A. 26 February 2009: Personally, I don't know why you are continuing this relationship. I'd be concerned if my gf had a lot of engagement rings. It means that she has been engaged for each ring she had. It would get me to think if she just couldn't commit or if the guy ... (read in full...)
Could an 18 year old girl and a 31 year old man have a successful relationship?
Q. I have recently started seeing a 31 year old man, i am 18. We get on well, and are both very attracted to each other but I know he thinks the age gap is an issue. We both look exactly our ages, which means we do get strange looks when we are out. I ...
A. 26 February 2009: It depends on the people. There are a lot of relationships that fail when there is no age difference. Now a 31/18 relationship may a little difficult, but if you guys work on it then it may succeed. ... (read in full...)
How to get him to play fair with the household bills?
Q. This is a long story but here goes. Iv been with my bf for a year now, and i have a daughter (but she is not his, he does treat her like his though). I live on my own with my daughter and im not working at the moment but am seeking, so i am...
A. 26 February 2009: I'm going to start off with the fact YOU have a daughter to support, he doesn't. You made the choice to create your child and he didn't. What you are asking him to do is to help you support you and your child. If he truly treated her like his own, ... (read in full...)
How to meet Latin women?
Q. I have always loved Latin women. I have dated a few before. I am headed to visit an old friend in Argentina later this year and I see this as a way to meet a potential girlfriend in a place where I have heard there are beautiful women. But the ...
A. 26 February 2009: You can take a spanish class at your local college to start off with to learn spanish. But as far as finding a latin woman, perhaps you should just sit back and just have fun down there, and just let things happen.. If love finds you, great. ... (read in full...)
All because of a picture...
Q. My bf wanted a pic of me and I sent it to him twice but he didn't get it... now he is mad at me and won't talk to me.. is this a reasonable issue for him to be mad at me about? I really want to talk to him.. what should I do ?...
A. 26 February 2009: A little reminder to everyone listening out there, DO NOT TRUST TECHNOLOGY TO WORK EACH AND EVERY TIME. I think your BF will eventually figure that out and feel like a heel for blaming you for not sending them.... (read in full...)
I'm not sure... could I be pregnant?
Q. Okay I'm 13 years old and I'm very scared of something I did. I had sex twice, one time I used a condom, the other time I didn't but it was only for like... 5-10 minutes. I don't know what to do!! He said something about he can sperm in that ...
A. 26 February 2009: I am just writing to fix some bad information listed on a previous answer. IF you have never had a period before, you can still become pregnant. When that happens, it is because they are a few of the "lucky" ones who get pregnant on their first ... (read in full...)
How would she of gotten his email address if he wasn't a member?
Q. i found a email from a girl in my husbands email box that had her email address. she claims to be from adult friend finder and it read this. hey its been like a month or something since we last chatted and I was thinking about you and decided to s...
A. 26 February 2009: If it eases you somewhat, the way that email is worded is worded similar to way these spam messages of dating sites are worded. Especially the part where it says to reply back to that email address. They always start off saying that you may not ... (read in full...)
Pregnant from this?
Q. Dear cupid,am afraid i might be pregnant. my bf and i usually use the withdrawal method when we have sex. a couple days ago after he ejaculated on my stomache, he wiped the sperm off myself and his self using a towel and couple minutes later we did ...
A. 26 February 2009: Sorry to tell you this, but even on the first time you could have got enough sperm inside you to conceive a child regardless whether he went into a second time, though the second time would definitely increase the chances. The withdrawal method is ... (read in full...)
Did I make a mistake by being easy?
Q. I've been emailing this man from a personal ad he had advertised online that I responded to. We've been corresponding since the beginning of February. Made out a couple of times, today I had sex with him. He's not interested in a relationship. Did I ...
A. 26 February 2009: Maybe it's just the types of guys you interested at meeting are just not much into commitment. If you want to find a different man that wants a more serious relationship, you need to think more outside of the box of which you have been thinking. ... (read in full...)
I'm feeling guilty for ending it all and not remaining friends
Q. i have broken all contacts with this girl and have gone away from her life forever. ours was a long distance relationship for one year and i had gone to her place in berlin a couple of times to stay with my grandparents during my holidays and really ...
A. 25 February 2009: Well ends of relationship are never easy. Ending things as friends, as noble as it may sound, may not be the best idea for some relationships. I tried staying friends with one of my ex-gf's before and it turned out worse because she couldn't get ... (read in full...)
Dick size & pregnancy?
Q. does dick size have to do with getting a girl pregnant....i went with this dude and he had a super little penis (we definatly didn't have sex) but he has a new girl now and I guess she's pregnant with his baby I'm sittin here thinkin to myself you ...
A. 25 February 2009: @jessica04: What you said reminded me of a little story about a girl who once told a guy that he had such a small paint brush to which he replied back that he was not used to painting cathedrals.
But my take on this is that, it's either a) fake ... (read in full...)
Is my son going to be tall?
Q. Hi, i have a child growth question for anybody who knows what they are talking about. I have a son who just turned 15 and he is around 5'7 or 5'8. I wondering if he will be fairly tall. Im only 5'9 and my wife is 4'10 but he seems tall to be our ...
A. 22 February 2009: A lot of things can determine height. It could be ancestors. it could go as far as just being a product of the environment. But he could just stop growing taller for all you know.. I'm 6'0" and I was 5'11" when I was 15/16.... (read in full...)
I think I'm sterile and have questions
Q. I am 19 years old. I know I am young but my boyfriend and I who have been together on and off. Have sex regularly sometimes twice a day. He almost always cums inside of me. Not saying that we want a baby so young or nothings its just we know how ...
A. 22 February 2009: You are still too young to worry about being sterile. Some people can take a very long time before they are successful at becoming pregnant while others like my wife got pregnant on our first try.
You say that you think that you may be sterile,... (read in full...)
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