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*arcy24

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I think my friend stole from me ......

Q.   I think my friend may have stolen from me and I feel awful thinking like this so I need some advice... A mutual friend of ours was getting married and we were both invited to the wedding. Unfortunately I wasn't able to attend as I was going o...

A.   17 August 2014: Horrible horrible! I am with intrigued3000 on this and it sounds very fishy to me. If true she should have told you immediately you came back from holiday that she had lost your gift. She is clever and calculating pretending she did not know what ... (read in full...)

My Daughter in Law is very hateful and angry all the time.

Q.   My youngest son had a previous marriage and has two sons from that marriage. After the divorce, he met a woman online from another state who has one son that he is married to now. His new wife was unhappy about the child support he was p...

A.   17 August 2014: This is just a horrible situation and I feel for you. I don't imagine everything in their house is as rosy as they pretend it to be. There is very little you can do here other than be supportive when you are given the opportunity. Deep down your son ... (read in full...)

Is it possible to gain back trust once it's lost? What if the person is a repeat "white liar"?

Q.   I will keep this question as simple as possible. Is it possible to gain trust back once it's lost? How? Has anyone ever dated/married someone who told numerous "white lies" but never cheated or lied about something extreme? And lastly, if ...

A.   10 July 2014: I am with Youwish on this. Your boyfriend is a compulsive liar and that type of personality is hard to break free from. I have known many compulsive liars and they all tell me that they do it because they can't be bothered to hear the conversation ... (read in full...)

He seems awfully close to his ex

Q.   So I've been dating this guy for a month almost to. Him and his ex just recently broke up. And he's still friends with her. They talk every single day and all day! Even when he's with me sometimes. They dated for over a year and lived together. ...

A.   18 June 2014: Honey get your self respect back and get rid. He is playing you for a fool. Dump him immediately. I am with Mark 100% on this. This chap is a liar and playing you. He is sleeping with her and desperately trying to play happy families to get her back ... (read in full...)

Has our relationship really ended?

Q.   Hi everyone. Pls help me ... Me and my guy statrted dating a year back.we work at the same office.everything was fine and good betweeen us.I fell for him .but he told he doesnot have marriage ideas with me as for that time. i did not take it to m...

A.   23 June 2013: No I don't think the relationship is over. You are clearly a strong woman and did not feel able to put up with him texting and spending time with a female colleague. You were right to feel that way and acted accordingly. I would not have been able ... (read in full...)

If she lied to me, and used me....will she now lie and use HIM as well?

Q.   Right so it's been a while so i've been hurt by this girl. Long story short, i met her about 4 years ago. She was an immigrant. Striking beauty. Struck up a friendship. Soon I was giving her money because she claimed to be poor, getting by. Drove ...

A.   10 May 2013: Great question. Having been there scrolling through endless pages of shit I know exactly where you are coming from. My answer is no, she will use him like she used you. My mind suggests sociopath, always on the look out for another mark and putting ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend is going to spend Mother's Day with his ex and his daughter

Q.   My boyfriend has a daughter with his ex, and usually he got to see his daughter after he finished class like around 9pm. Recently his ex decided that 9pm is too late to come see her (even though on the days she works, she's ok with him watching her ...

A.   10 May 2013: You have a very lovely way of writing a post and should take up writing as a career. I agree whole heartedly with Sugarplum. I wouldn't like any of this but if you make a fuss you will be seen as the bad woman stopping him from seeing his child. The ... (read in full...)

Did she cop out of the relationship and choose her career?

Q.   Did she Cop out ? We were together for 1 year and like any couples we have our ups and downs.Im not perfect and never claim to be but then again who is? The last 4 months have been a right test for both of us because we were going to move in toget...

A.   28 April 2013: Yes definitely do not contact her and let her come to you. A bit of time and space can help these situations enormously and will give her time to miss you. Get on with your own life, keep yourself busy and get on with doing things you like doing. ... (read in full...)

I know the relationship is over but I'm mad that he didn't even have the decency to end it. He just stopped contacting me

Q.   I was dating this guy for a month, and we were sleeping together. We both went away over the Easter break and he said before we left that'd we'd see each other afterwards. Then when we both got back I texted him to ask if he wanted to meet ...

A.   19 April 2013: Sounds like a right tosser. Will undoubtedly let a bit of time pass and then call you. Don't sit around pining for this chap, get out there and meet someone new.... (read in full...)

He disappeared without an explanation. Couldn't he at least explained first?

Q.   Iam a 33 year old woman and I have been divorced for about 3 years. About 7 months ago, I met a man online from USA through a dating website. He immediately asked for my number and we got chatting and talking regularly. I am a professional and...

A.   7 April 2013: I am really sorry that this has happened to you. The issue for him was that you were safe as you lived in a different country so posed no real threat to him but as the day grew nearer to you meeting it became too close for comfort and it would have... (read in full...)

She text me and told her not to text her again, but should I text her back?

Q.   Hello i,m a 52 yr old man, haven,t had much experience with women, find it difficult to read the sign,s/ signals, i have been on 2 dates with a 51 yr old woman, but 6 days ago she txt me and said, that she finds me childish, and have i got mental ...

A.   25 March 2013: No don't text her, she is not the woman for you. I would set my sights at finding a lady more suitable for you, one who is caring and loving and who wants a relationship but wants to take things slowly, This lady told you not to text her so abide by ... (read in full...)

Will you let go of your cat you love if your mate has a terrifying phobia?

Q.   I am interested in pursuing a relationship with a good friend of mine. We were once in a romantic relationship that ended because of the distance but now we realize we can't do without each other. He is planning to move down here with me so we ca...

A.   24 March 2013: Keep the cat!! Nothing else to be said!... (read in full...)

He has become 'best friends' with a female co-worker, they text all the time and go to lunch together. If I get upset about it he calls me insecure, but don't I have a right to be in this situation?

Q.   My husband and I have been married for six years and he has always had the same job.. Well recently he has started talking about a coworker all the time telling me how great she is. He goes to lunches with her alone and they text back and forth ...

A.   21 March 2013: I really don't want to hurt you with this but there is far more going on between your husband and the co-worker than you are aware of. He is enjoying the attention from both of you and is enjoying playing one off against the other. The fact that ... (read in full...)

He's been deleting texts to his ex wife, and I've found out she is going to the same yoga studio as him.....should I be worried?

Q.   Recently, I was on my husband and I'd ipad, and I noticed that his text messages were syncing with his phone under Messenger. I went to look at them, and noticed that his ex-wife sent him a few texts. Nothing was sexual or suggestive, but I could ...

A.   15 March 2013: I personally wouldn't be at all comfortable with this. A 40 min drive seems quite a long way to to to Yoga unless she really loved the studio. However, I myself drive 30 mins to pilates because I enjoy the instructor so there could be nothing in it. ... (read in full...)

Should I just shut up about these women in my boyfriend's life?

Q.   I've been seeing my boyfriend for 5 months and we have so much fun together, we're very similar and like all the same things, I think he's great. But the problem is other people do too. His ex girlfriend post pictures of him on facebook, he wears ...

A.   9 March 2013: This all depends on how jealous you feel. I myself am a very jealous woman and I would not be able to just ignore all these things. I have been in a similar situation and my husband told me basically to put up with it or shove off. He told me he is ... (read in full...)

He left me standing mid date, with no explaination.

Q.   Me and my 30yo boyfriend were hanging out with friends at a coffee shop. He got a phone call (didn't see who it was), went outside to answer it. He never came back. We got there at 9:40pm, he got the call around 10:20. I waited, but my friends w...

A.   3 March 2013: I was with a guy for years who would stand me up and just disappear. His favourite was to go to the loo and then just go home leaving me sitting like an idiot. Twice I sent men into the toilets incase he'd collapsed but he had always gone. He told ... (read in full...)

It is ok for a single childless woman to date a man with kids?

Q.   Hi. My question is: is there ever anything good about a single childless woman who doesn't plan to have kids having a relationship with a divorced guy with kids? Or is it always just bad? I've read a lot about the negatives, does anyone know if ...

A.   2 March 2013: I can tell you from experience that the children always always come first and that can be very diificult to deal with. There also is constant baby mama drama and demands for money. Given my time again I would never date or marry any man unless his ... (read in full...)

My daughter is having trouble with her father and his fiance. Is there anything I can do to help?

Q.   Hi, my daughter has been having trouble with her dad and his new fiance.They have been together for about 18mths and engaged for two. When they first got together my daughter happily went to their house.She has three children and things went. I...

A.   28 February 2013: This is a really sad and difficult situation and I am sorry to hear that you are both going through this. I think it is very poor that your ex husband has not stood up for his daughter - she is only ten. I would not ask my daughter to apologize to ... (read in full...)

After all these years should I try to apologize for my behavior?

Q.   I would appreciate some advice regarding an ex 'girlfriend', over whom I have some feelings of guilt. She was the first girl I ever kissed, when I was 15 and she was 14. We went to the same school and although we didn't know each other there, I'd...

A.   16 February 2013: If I was the lady I would like to hear what you had to say . Just keep it short. If you get a sort of half smile when she sees you then she pretty much remembers it all and a mention about the past may well be welcome. ... (read in full...)

Completely confused with exes behaviour!?

Q.   Hi I am totally confused with my exes behaviour! We broke up at Christmas after an argument. He barely spoke to me over Christmas then told me the day after boxing day that he wanted to break up and he'd arranged somewhere else to live! ...

A.   15 February 2013: You need to go no contact with him so he starts to miss you. At the moment you are doing all the running, chasing and organising and he isn't playing. Leave him alone and stop texting. If you follow the no contact rule it is likely he will miss you ... (read in full...)

Boyfriend stood me up for dinner but is giving me the silent treatment saying I didn't text him back "I love you".

Q.   My 28 year-old boyfriend was here to dine with me. He got a call from his mother, who asked him to meet her to give her something. He left and said he'd come back very soon. So I left his food on the table and waited. He didn't show up. An h...

A.   14 February 2013: I presume the meal was at your home. I would have gone bonkesr that he didn't text you or ring you to let you know what was going on. Surely this is a matter of common courtesy. You indicate from your post that he has done these things before - well ... (read in full...)

I lied to my employer when I handed in my notice. Current employer offered me better position. Should I accept it or just leave?

Q.   Last year my grandfather died and he left some of his money to me and to my brother. Here's my dilemma... I have worked all my life The problem is that the line if work I'm in, customer services pays badly and there is zero respect in the j...

A.   13 February 2013: This happens all the time. People go into a bartering situation and play one job off against the other. Ok your other job is not real but no one needs to know that. You won't get caught out and if you like working in your current company then I ... (read in full...)

Are my fears valid? I am afraid that if I lose weight, I will get noticed just as a person up for sex and they will take no notice of my personality.

Q.   Is anyone having a hard time losing weight, because they fear that they will attract guys/girls for the wrong reasons? I am significantly overweight, and am invisible to the opposite sex. I am perfectly presentable, and kind, and likeable othe...

A.   13 February 2013: It might be good to lose weight for your general health and just to be a bit fitter but who you are inside does not change whatever size you are as you have pointed out. I love your comment that fat is a great jerk detector! I can only comment on my ... (read in full...)

Woman I met on a lesbian dating site is actually bisexual and married! How could she be so deceitful, and should I confront her?

Q.   I'm a lesbian and a few months back I joined a lesbian dating site. Shortly thereafter a member contacted me and expressed an interest in me. I was impressed with how she presented herself, what she conversated about. I have since taken a fond ...

A.   12 February 2013: Oh gosh this must have come as a shock to you and I am sorry you have been hurt. I think the thing with dating sites is that not everyone is honest and above board. Often you find people just looking for a fling, still married and always well above ... (read in full...)

Tormented by jealous thoughts - please help

Q.   I'm really struggling to deal with my paranoid and jealous thoughts at the moment. I've been with my partner for over 3 years now and we got engaged in November, but for some reason I just can't stop thinking that he is cheating on me or up to no ...

A.   11 February 2013: You have every right to feel concerned and suspicious because if he did it to his wife he will do it to you too. Leopard's do not change their spots. I can think of numerous examples of friends I have known who while their marriages were 'ending' ... (read in full...)

I still can't forget about my lover after a year. How do I get over it?

Q.   i'm married lady and had an affair with a married man for 8 months and then we got caught and we needed to end that. its been almost a year and i can't forget about him i think about him day and night miss him so much plz help me....

A.   7 February 2013: Rikky, let it go. 8 months is a long time and he would have been in touch by now if he wanted the two of you to be together. Yes it is sad and hard but it is time to move on. Don't contact him as it will only make you more upset. I am sure he knows ... (read in full...)

What are his intentions? ignores me for several weeks, then sends a text.

Q.   I dated this very good looking man for about 6 weeks. He texted me as soon as he woke up every day and we saw each other once or twice a week. Then we had a fight because I got jealous over his female friends and he put me in my place by clarifying ...

A.   7 February 2013: I actually think that you are playing quite a good game if you actually want him as you are appearing quite disinterested so he has to chase you. He obviously knows he is agood looking and probably plays the field but he is definitely interested in ... (read in full...)

He re-arranged my furniture because his kids wanted it that way! They were guests, surely they should have left it alone?

Q.   Please help. I have stayed over at boyfriends place before, when his two kids of 9 and 7 were visiting as well. (They live with their mum.) There were no real problems. He had some time off to look after them when they had a couple of days off ...

A.   5 February 2013: I personally would have gone bonkers but I asked my 17 year old the question and he said just to chill! I think it depends if you hold store by your belongings and furniture and don't want your home messed with. I think it was incredibly ... (read in full...)

Is it or is it not disrespectful to a wife when a man chats it up with some strange woman and ignores you completely.

Q.   I do not know how to add my age to my account but I am 43 years old and my husband is 49. My husband was single for many years after his divorce. I was single for a 2 years before we met, then we were together 4 years before getting married. Yet ...

A.   5 February 2013: I would be very unhappy in this situation. It is rude and disrespecful. I introduce anyone that I am with to people I bump into as it is a matter of coutesy and even more so if it is your husband or wife. I can only assume he is one of these guys ... (read in full...)

What is the time frame in moving on from a broken heart?

Q.   How long it takes to move on from a broken heart in a relationship when you plan to stay single for some time (atleast a year or more) . A relationship which wasn't always perfect but it had its good sides! and how to make it easy to move on?...

A.   31 January 2013: My doctor told me one month for each year of the relationship. I actually think it can be a lot longer and is only really stopped when you meet someone new.... (read in full...)

I have trust issues with my BF after he sexted his ex on Facebook

Q.   Hello all! i have a question about my partner. It's been a rocky road for us but he moved in in november 2012. A week after i discovered messages to his ex lovers, not one but a few, which angered and hurt me immensely. He reminisced about their se...

A.   27 January 2013: Stupid This chap wants his cake and to eat it. He is not showing you any respect by constantly talking to these 'friends' and texting them etc. The fact that he had moved in with you and continued to say that he was single is a big red flag. I ... (read in full...)

Confused - why didn't my ex recognise me??

Q.   Ok, this might sound a bit weird, but I wanted someone else’s perspective on it. I dated a guy for about nine months in 2009; it was a fairly serious relationship, but we split because we lived too far apart to make it work. It was a fairly amicable ...

A.   19 January 2013: All I can say is when I left uni I was on a tube and iI saw by the doors a guy that I had gone out with for about 2 years at school. I recognised Alex immediately and worked my way down the tube to say hello. Nothing about me had changed - same hair ... (read in full...)

Should I be jealous of his female friend on facebook?

Q.   Just so I'm clear, my boyfriend is 19 and I'm 16. So my boyfriend and I recently had problems in our relationship because he felt we were losing our love for each other and we are still trying to get back to the way it was but now I'm having a...

A.   19 January 2013: Janniepeg has written an excellent response and I cannot add much. Your boyfriend is not taking your wishes or needs into consideration and although he is your boyfriend he is still basically doing what he wants to do. This is causing you upset and ... (read in full...)

Moment of silence for Dear Abby

Q.   I think we should have a moment of silence for the passing of our fellow agoney aunt Dear Abby....

A.   19 January 2013: Rest in peace - inspirational lady along with Anne Landers, gave a great deal of hope and advice to us all.... (read in full...)

When my boyfriend has any problem, he goes to his best friend (a girl) and not me!

Q.   Hey everyone,I'v been dating my boyfriend for over 4 years,my boyfriend has this best friend who is a girl and they have been friends since kindergarden and over the years I'v become friends with her too,we hang out together..BUT I really feel bad ...

A.   8 January 2013: I wouldn't like this at all and it would cause terrible rows if it was me. You do need to explain that you like Remi and know they are friends from way back but as a girlfriend you should be the first person he turns to. I am with SVC also, if they ... (read in full...)

Update on I was expecting to hear from him but haven't heard a word for 2 days

Q.   So for all who were following my story of the guy who I was expecting to come to my house but never showed up... (original story below for anyone else) Well it appears he's just fine. I didn't contact his parents or anyone, but I noticed he cha...

A.   8 January 2013: He is a committment phobe and out to play the field. He has behaved in a horrid and upsetting way so now remove yourself from his life and let him get on with it. He will behave in the same manner to other girls going forward so you will not be ... (read in full...)

I was expecting him to visit 2 days ago and haven't heard a word! I don't know what it means or what to do?

Q.   Really confused by this guy's actions. We met on a dating site about a month ago. Really seemed like we hit it off. We started talking every day and we went on a several dates. We went out to dinner and I met his parents. He wanted me to hang ...

A.   6 January 2013: I agree with Oldbag wholeheartedly. No. I do not think he is lying in a hospital, been in an accident, arrested or anything like that he just for whatever reason chnaged his mind and he did not have the guts to tell you. A disgustingly cruel wa... (read in full...)

Karma: people seem to get rewarded for bad behaviour, so is there any point in being a good person?

Q.   Hi, I was wondering if anyone saw anything bad happen to bad people? I see a guy who cheated in the IQ test to get a job become the manager of a company. I see a woman who cheated on her husband living happily with her husband and kid. I see dislo...

A.   6 January 2013: I have watched people behave well and people behave badly and seen it all unfold. I am a great believer in karma but have found it sometimes takes a long time to come round. I know a lot of succesful people and they are all really bad nasty peop... (read in full...)

I feel really jealous that he has moved on before me!

Q.   A year and a half ago I met this guy, we had a fling for two weeks and he returned to his home country. Four months later I went out there to travel, but ende up staying with him in his city for 7 months. We had an intense, unstable, emotional ...

A.   28 November 2012: I had a very pwerful and emotional relationship with a man similar to what you are describing when I was in my early 20's. I literally hung on his every word and was indescribibly drawn to him. He had many female friends and the jealousy I felt tore ... (read in full...)

What can I do? I'm devastated after an unanticipated breakup

Q.   Hi I am new here. I was with my ex for two years I thought we were so happy he was the best thing that ever happened to me. Yes we had arguments and it got really tough then he lost his job and I was paying for everything we had a flat in the end we ...

A.   29 October 2012: Youwish is spot on here. He has done you a huge favour. He was a freeloader and took advanatge of you. Granted he did the right thing by leaving so he wasn't poncing off you anymore but he was flaky and not strong enough for you. You need a strong ... (read in full...)

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