Biological clock in overdrive - please help!
Q. I'm a 30 year old woman in a committed 3 year relationship. I have lived with my partner for over 2 years now, and moved abroad to live with him. For the past year I have been struggling with increasing desire to have a child. Please understand that ...
A. 6 November 2009: I understand exactly what you are going through because when I was 30 I desperately started wanting a child too. I had a good job but was not fufilled in any way. My husband was not very interested and I had to badger him into it. I would say in ... (read in full...)
I can't get over my ex-fiance and now he's married
Q. i cant get over my ex fiance. i have tried really hard. when we were together he was very matter of fact and not emotionally caring. i did so much for him. we were together about 3 1/2 years. we got engaged together about 6 months after we met and ...
A. 25 October 2009: Don't spend anymore time dwelling on this. What has been is over and done with and hindsight is a wonderful thing. Leave both of the guys alone. If the ex fiance had been so wonderful you would not have been tempted by another and it is only that ... (read in full...)
Are girls in this country just shallow and racist?
Q. Hi everyone, I'm a 22 years old male living in the UK. I'm originally from Japan, however I've been living here for a long time, since i was young. I don't know if this type of things should be asked on here, as it's not directly linked to existing...
A. 21 October 2009: I am really sorry you are feeling like this. At my son's school half the boys are Japanese and they are very successful with the girls normally because they are respectful, intelligent and have excellent manners! You just haven't met the right girl ... (read in full...)
I didn't know that I was the "other woman"
Q. Hi I'm hoping someone can give me some advice. 18 months ago I started seeing this guy, it wasn't meant to be anything serious, we only saw each other once every couple of weeks. However, after about 6-8 months I started to fall in love with him...
A. 17 October 2009: I am really sorry that this has happened to you. Firstly you are not awful or dirty in any way - you have just been used. You may have loved him but the person you loved wasn't the real man. The real man uses two women and thinks only of his own ... (read in full...)
What does she want? She says she is really into me but then she just wants to be friends!
Q. Okay, here goes.....This may be quite lengthy so bare with me.....Okay I work with this lady and she is ABSOLUTELY STUNNING! (in my eyes anyway!) I'm not bad looking myself and there has always been a physical attraction between us. We knew each ...
A. 16 October 2009: Yes she's really into you but playing it cool and hard to get. I would imagine she has been messed around before and probably had her heart broken so is a bit wary and wants to ensure that it doesn't happen again. If I were you I would text her and ... (read in full...)
Is she cheating or am I just paranoid?
Q. dear cupid, earlier this year i was involved in a very nasty break up that resulted in me being admitted to hospital after an attempted overdose, because of this the relationship ended, during my time in hospital i became close to a girl who had ...
A. 14 October 2009: I normally trust my gut instinct in times like these. From reading your post I would imagine she is up to something. She has become secretive, taking the phone with her everywhere and putting on vibrate is indicative of someone with something to ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my husband that I want to end the marriage?
Q. I'm a married woman who is in love with another man. Sexofone is his name and we met 8yrs ago while were still in university. We were crazy about each other but things changed when he introduced me to his family..the prblm was that we come from ...
A. 13 October 2009: Sexophone, what a great name! I heartily echo Gina's words. Tell him for you it is over and you are starting a new life without him. ... (read in full...)
My husband cheated whilst we were engaged and had a baby with this other woman, how do I accept the child in my life?
Q. I've been married for 3yrs now and I'm not happy. My husband cheated on me while were engaged and 6 months later after we got married I found out that his girlfriend had just given birth to a baby boy. This came as shock to me, I was hurt so bad and ...
A. 13 October 2009: My best friend was married to a man for 4 years when he had an affair and the other woman got pregnant. They now have a 3 year old child. This is what my friends life is now like. She is bizarrely still married to him. Every weekend he goes and ... (read in full...)
Did I come across as jealous?
Q. I mentioned to my ex about reconciling..he said he can't just jump back into things which is fine..and also that we'll talk on the phone and then meet...its been almost 2 months of talking which is fine but i'm getting nervous about what if he loses ...
A. 13 October 2009: You are obviously very upset over this as I think you posed a similar question yesterday. No I don't think you came over as jealous. The thing here is you are coming over as a bit desperate and needy because it has been two months and you are still ... (read in full...)
Why can't he contact me even once a week?
Q. I have been with my Bf for over 3 years. We lived together for 2 and 1/2 of those 3 years. We have both been through a lot together, even illnesses. My current problem is that right now we are many many miles apart due to different national...
A. 12 October 2009: I don't want to hurt you or upset you but this guy is quite able to call you several times a week but chooses not to. He is clearly not very considerate of your feelings because having told him a couple of times that even to leave an answer phone ... (read in full...)
Did I say all the right things?
Q. I mentioned to my ex about reconciling..he said he can't just jump back into things which is fine..and also that we'll talk on the phone and then meet...its been almost 2 months of talking which is fine but i'm getting nervous about what if he loses ...
A. 12 October 2009: I think you can only be the way you are. I would have come over as a bit dispondent at the 4am business too but at least you did not ask outright where he had been. In these situations it is best to remain upbeat if you can. Make light small talk ... (read in full...)
He broke it off with me and went back to his wife. Now he is trying to get back with me again!
Q. My fellow left his wife x 2 months, then he went back to her didn't call me for 9 days then started calling with the excuse he wanted to check on me see if I was all right - when he left it was clear he was letting me go sat at my table and said so ...
A. 11 October 2009: Scumbag. Don't take him back again or he will just go between the two of you boosting his ego. I feel for you and for his wife. I know you love him but he really isn't worth the love. You have to remember if he will cheat on his wife and come to you ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend got a girl pregnant?
Q. Hello everyone, I am in desperate need of some advice. I have been with my boyfriend for almost two years now. I am 20 and he is 22. I have to say he is my everything, I am deeply in love with him. Our relationship has always been a good one, except ...
A. 10 October 2009: RhythmandBlues has given the best advice I have ever read. Yes, RUN. Run NOW. There is no way in a million years that you could ever put up with this situation. Watching another womans baby come into the world, all the tests, visits, money spent, ... (read in full...)
I am in the perfect relationship. Why do I feel so needy?
Q. I am in the perfect relationship, we have perfect chemistry.I just don't know why I have these overwhelming feelings of need towards him... He does everything right by me, he is faithful, he is loyal, he is loving, encouraging and supportive. When...
A. 9 October 2009: Maybe you are frightened of losing what you have got so you are hanging onto it as tightly as possible. Feelings like this do stem from insecurity so you need to get that old independent you back again. I am very well aware from my past that ... (read in full...)
Is there still hope that I can make changes and save our marriage?
Q. I have been married for 15 years. My husband has asked to leave... I have asked for him to stay and let us try... we have been trying for years. I am not able to quite. He has agreed to stay in our home (by my begging) until he finds a place which ...
A. 5 October 2009: I really agree with OldGuy and his comments are sound. I personally think it is time to call it a day. Pull yourself together and let him go. Realistically you are not going to make these changes because you would have done so already so the best ... (read in full...)
His constant sexual innuendos are making me think he is just after one thing, I just want a normal conversation with him!
Q. Hello Just wanted a bit of advice on how to take this guy ... Ok have been talking for a few months when ever I saw him, he works near me. He would always come over and speak to me whenever I saw him, we would chat for a while and he would always s...
A. 5 October 2009: Personally i hate this kind of thing. I have one friend who does it constantly - every word is a barely veiled sexual comment or sexual innuendo. I don't like it and I think it is weird and a bit creepy. Yup listen to your gut. I actually would say ... (read in full...)
Is he in it just for a good time?
Q. So I've met this guy and he is just exactly what i've been looking for for a while. He is very good and im good around him, he doesnt seem like a guy who would treat a girl wrong, when he looks at me i see it in him eye that he is really into me and ...
A. 5 October 2009: Dicaprio 174 is spot on. Ignore him totally and he'll come running. Been there 100 times myself and made fool after fool of myself texting and ringing. My advice from many many years experience is if you like him leave him alone. It is all about the ... (read in full...)
How can I boost my bosom?
Q. i am 14 years old and my breasts are too small they look like one cup! What should i do to make them grow or atleast to make them look bigger without using medical stuff??...
A. 4 October 2009: You might think this is really odd but eating a papaya - pawpaw a day really helps. I went from a 33 to a 35 in 6 months and thought it odd and didn't realise that the only thing I had been doing that was different was eating one of these a day. ... (read in full...)
What kinds of things do guys do when they like a girl?
Q. I don't know if this site is only for personal problems, but I really want to get an answer from a guy, or as many as posible. How can a girl tell if a guy really likes her? What knd signs does he give off during conversation or just when he's near ...
A. 3 October 2009: Lazy Guy's comment is spot on - they do ignore you... (read in full...)
What kind of flirting do men really like?
Q. What kind of flirting by women do men really like? I mean, what types of things get a man's interest going in a good way, getting him intrigued and attracted, and interested emotionally and physically. I mean as opposed to the stuff that just makes ...
A. 3 October 2009: I too would love to hear the views of q1605!
Listening as Caring Guy said is imperative especially about work issues and then give informed non judgemental replies that always make his actions appear to be the right ones. This is truly really bori... (read in full...)
After being away in the army so long she only wanted sex once and it's driving me mad!
Q. I recently returned from the army to my wife. In base there was not a female we could interact with and having no sex for so long drives one mad. Don't get me wrong even if I could interact I wouldn't cheat on her. On my first night here, we got b...
A. 24 September 2009: Sometimes when people have been apart for a while it takes a while to rebuild that level of intimacy again. Even gaps of just a couple of weeks can make things fel awkward beween couples. As the other posters have said make her feel wanted and ... (read in full...)
He was so nasty, I don't understand why I still think about him all the time?
Q. Hi everyone! I hope someone can help me with this problem. I just can't seem to get over my ex even though we split two years ago. I know I should be over him by now and all my friends tell me this. I find myself thinkIng about him all the time. He ...
A. 21 September 2009: I am really sorry that you are feeling this way. Closure takes different times for everyone. A doctor told me 18 months to 2 years was about average in s serious relationship. I have found that until you meet someone else that you do think about ... (read in full...)
Do chicks like red pubic hair?
Q. Okay, I am just wondering, do girls like red pubic hair? I mean, Im 18, just turned legal and want to know does it? I'm a natural red head. Just curious....
A. 13 August 2009: We ar all different but I find it very attractive. My fiance has red pubic hair and so does my son, very orange in fact! Everyone feels differently.... (read in full...)
Is it a good idea to text my ex happy birthday?
Q. is it a good idea to text your ex telling him happy birthday and what is a suggested text?...
A. 5 August 2009: Mmm..no , don't send anything, let it go.... (read in full...)
Is my partner just not interested in me anymore?
Q. I have been in a relationship for the past 8 years and the last time we made love was 1 year ago while on holidays in Spain! Now I must agree that sex is not my favourite thing I do enjoy it now and again. I am in counselling for work related str...
A. 3 August 2009: I didn't have sex with my husband for 5 years due to work related stress. 5 years is too long for anyone to go without sex and so he looked elsewhere. I think a year with no affection is quite a long time and you are going to have to work hard at ... (read in full...)
Best friend told me it was ok to go out with her ex, but it really wasn't!
Q. I'v been very stupid and already im regretting it!! My best friend split up with this guy that she absolutly loved in november because he treated her badly and then soon after in february she started going out with this guy that she met at work....
A. 2 August 2009: I would say that your friend is more upset with herself than you. She clearly gave you the red light then obviously regretted her decision. She has only herself to blame. I would give her a bit of breathing space for a while.
I will say though from... (read in full...)
I'm having doubts that I'm the biological father of my son... How can I approach this subject with him?
Q. I have a 22yr old son, and have always had suspicions about whether or not I am his biological father. My ex-wife (of 20 years) and I split when he was 7. I later discovered she had been having an affair around the time he was conceived. I lo...
A. 2 August 2009: I honestly wouldn't go down this route as I think it could cause irreparable harm to your son. I do know that there are tests out there that can detect DNA etc from just a hair from a hairbrush so you could probably find this out without even ... (read in full...)
I worked a lot to provide for her and she left me because of it, and now is with someone she sees even less!
Q. I have been split from my ex for 3 years and I'm still madly in lovwith her. When we were together I worked alot sometimes as much as 4 jobs at one time. I done this so I could ensure a good future for her and our 2 kids. When she split with me she ...
A. 1 August 2009: I also think that the advice fro Icelordess is excellent. I think if she acknowledged what you did for her then you would feel differently. It is as if all your efforts have been in vain and that she has not appreciated your worth. When I was ... (read in full...)
Who should initiate things again when we are both afraid of the relationship?
Q. He was deeply hurt by something he thought I caused. Time has passed and now he knows I did not cause the action. We talked about it and he has overcome this and sees he was wrong. But his reaction caused me extreme hurt and I mean extreme and he ...
A. 31 July 2009: Yours is a really good and interesting question. I too have been blamed for something I didn't do and my boyfriend in the end realised his mistake but the hurt and anger it caused me was extreme. My boyfriend also did not chase me and my firm belief ... (read in full...)
Everytime I hook up with my girlfriend I feel sick and I hurt "down there"!
Q. Ok I have a girlfriend right? And we hook up or cuddle or whatever you want to call it, and when we do it gets really intense but, I havent had sex with her yet. Shes had it before but Im still a virgin. Now the thing is a couple of hours after ...
A. 31 July 2009: This is totally normal and used to happen to me when I was young. it is a build up of adrenaline and sexual tension and with women gives them intense stomach ache and sickness. This passes if you masterbate - all totally natural.... (read in full...)
He's not into me... right?
Q. So, to make a long story short. I met this guy about 3 1/2 years ago. We were both in relationships and did nothing but email almost every day for about 10 months. We definitely had a serious attraction and got to know each other well through these ...
A. 30 July 2009: Excellent advice from AskOlder sister.
After reading your post there is no reason why he would want to give you up as you are fun, there for him and kind and supportive at all times. I think you do have to go with his comment of 'not wanting a girl... (read in full...)
Can I make my period come sooner or later?
Q. I'm going on vacation with my best friend on the 24th and I'm susposed to get my period then which will be horrible ... so is there anyway I can make it come sooner or later ?...
A. 13 July 2009: Go to your doctor and he will put you on the pill for a ahort time. This will delay your period and you can come off it as soon as the holiday is over. Sometimes the pill can put your cycle off a bit so don't worry if there is a longer or shorter ... (read in full...)
How can I remain dignified and strong?
Q. Hi all, can someone please tell me how to keep dignified and strong. I was seeing a guy I have known for years for the past 3 months, stupid I know, he is going through a divorce (has 2 children with his wife) has bought a house and lives ...
A. 12 July 2009: You are obviously very together and have your head screwed on. Keep your head held high. If you see him smile and be pleasant and make some small talk and then move on. Always act like you are really busy and that you can't stop to talk. You have ... (read in full...)
Can people really change? Or is it just an act?
Q. To start, as of now I'm 25 and he's almost 27. So I started seeing this guy back in Jan. 08. After about a month into the relationship I became pregnant. I really didn't know what I thought about him at the time and I certainly wasn't ready to ...
A. 11 July 2009: I don't think people can change. I think they may pretend to to get something out of a relationship or to make their life easier but I don't think they change inside. People will say a lot of things but when you are back with them after a few weeks ... (read in full...)
Is there a certain age when women find sex more satisfying?
Q. Is there a certain age that woman find sex more satisfying or appealing? Is there a certain age that woman have more sex? Woman any advice? ...
A. 10 July 2009: I think early 40's when you are at ease with your body and your children don't take up so much time so you are not so tired.... (read in full...)
I did everything for him but now I'm all alone
Q. Hi guys, I wanna start telling you guys that I'm gay, last week my bf and I broke up after a very ugly argument, that day ii texted him, he answered me in this way, what do you want? so I asked him why did he reply like that so he said, "omfg i dont ...
A. 8 July 2009: I don't think he is very nice or respectful and as thatgothgirl20 says 'you can do better'. I would n't add your female friend to facebook as it is a ruse to get you to tell her things to pass on to your boyfriend. I would leave them alone for a ... (read in full...)
Does a cheat and a liar ever change?
Q. i have been with my boyfriend now for three years, in that time he has cheated once what i know of, and lied on many occasions. i have stayed around i suppose in the hope of him changing, and i really thought he had, until i found out he lied to m...
A. 8 July 2009: NO, a liar and a cheat never change they just become more manipulative and try harder to conceal what they are up to. I have atually found that around the 40 year old mark men seem to lie more than at any other age. Whether this is because they feel ... (read in full...)
I've become the back up friend
Q. sorry for the length but need advice plse. My best friend, who I have become close to and who I have been there for,this past year especially, is always talking about this other woman ( who is married with a child,) she has become friends (...
A. 8 July 2009: This is very very hurtful and you have to distance yourself and let go. Don't be there all the time for her and let her get on with her new friend. Withdraw and distance yourself and find someone else to hang out with. She has chosen this other ... (read in full...)
She's ignoring me over a misunderstanding, so should I keep trying or forget about her?
Q. My girlfriend recently broke up with me. It is kind of a long story so I won't get in to all of it but long story short she misubderstood something I said, took it as being a control freak said it brought up a red flag. She agreed to talk to me last ...
A. 7 July 2009: I would leave everything alone for a while. Keep her stuff with you but don't make any ultimatums or give her any deadlines. Even after a few days people calm down and see things differently. I would e-mail her in a nice calm manner stating exactly ... (read in full...)
She makes plans with other guys and then lies to me about it!
Q. i Hve been in a relationship with my gf for about 4 years. The main issue in the relationship is trust. Specifically about other men. My gf has this tendency to make plan to meet with guys for beer or conversation, but oftentimes lies to me about ...
A. 7 July 2009: Mmmm... I have been in a similar situation myself with my ex husband. He would be overly flirtaious in bars and restaurants after work when I was at home and his plans would change all the time. I used to ask him in advance where he was going or ... (read in full...)
He always says how wonderful his ex is, I worry they might meet while I'm away!
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half now and I think is going ok. He talks about his ex since ive been with him and always says how wonderful she is, he split up with his ex when he was 22 years old, now he's 34. He keeps a photo of...
A. 5 June 2009: He doesn't sound at all trustworthy to me and he may well be up to no good whilst you are away. It could ofcourse all be just chat and he means nothing by it. I think you are remarkably calm over the hotel and tickets story - I would have gone ... (read in full...)
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