Should I go on a date with him?
Q. I met a guy on Facebook a week a go. He messaged me first saying hi and I responded and we chatted for like an hour and told him I had to sleep to wake up early the next morning. He ask me for my number and I have it to him.the next day he texted me ...
A. 27 September 2019: I'm always a little wary of people who look for "dates" on Facebook. To me (and I might we alone in this) it feels a little like stalking your prey. Because they can find out a LOT about you (if you post a lot of PERSONAL stuff) and you don't know ... (read in full...)
He didn't try to stop me when I told him I lost interest. Can I salvage this?
Q. Please don't make fun of me on this post because I'm not looking for smart comments like "Well you lost interest, so why do you care? There is this guy i was having a casual sexual relationship with for 3 years. All was great, except he wouldn...
A. 26 September 2019: You can't salvage something that never really was more than a casual f-buddy situation. Sure he also enjoyed your conversations, but that really means squat in the bigger picture.
WHY have you settled for a casual thing for 3 years? It seems a ... (read in full...)
How would you handle your partner making such a comment?
Q. I have been married for about ten years. I married later in life, being a career person and single parent before that. At first I was wildly in love with my husband, and ignored several red flags, thinking that with someone to love him that they ...
A. 25 September 2019:
Thanks for the update!
Glad you talked to him and got it cleared up.
As far as "bedroom fun" you two have to navigate with the changes. And that does take talking about it occasionally when things aren't as you would like them to be.
Good l... (read in full...)
How would you handle your partner making such a comment?
Q. I have been married for about ten years. I married later in life, being a career person and single parent before that. At first I was wildly in love with my husband, and ignored several red flags, thinking that with someone to love him that they ...
A. 24 September 2019: OP, I think he was just being honest. And I get that it hurts to be told that he ACTUALLY felt pestered by your level of sex drive. The thing is HE never mentioned it UNTIL you asked. Because I think he knew that having sex when you asked would mean ... (read in full...)
Our relationship has broken down after I had our baby!
Q. So I gave birth to my little boy three months ago. The pregnancy wasn’t planned as me and my partner always said that we didn’t want children, nothing against them it’s just that I don’t really think I’m a maternal person and I’ve always been a ...
A. 24 September 2019: Well, my guess is that he is upset that you changed your mind about kids. If he and you were in accord about NOT having kids and then when you find yourself pregnant you decide to have the child (nothing wrong about that, mind you) - but he might ... (read in full...)
My best friend wants to get me interested in his fetish thing?!?
Q. My male best friend who have known for the last 6 years He is into fetish wear and sex toys and games. He has confided in me and told me some info about his other life what interests him in this etc. He wants to get me now into it wearing outf...
A. 23 September 2019: Whether or not there ARE friends who do this, is IRRELEVANT. (I have no idea as I wouldn't call it a friendship when it crosses the line into sexuality)
The REAL question is, IS it something you want to do or not? (with him) If the answer i... (read in full...)
Just because I blocked him doesn’t mean I’m still stuck on him, right?
Q. So, my ex and I broke up two years ago! We’re together about 2 years. It was a very toxic relationships. He never left me alone! Him and I would break up he would show up at my job. Or he would put things on my car when I was at home. He is...
A. 22 September 2019: No, you are so not stuck on him to with him.
HE WANTS YOU TO THINK HE IS YOUR ONLY OPTION.
From your side it's OVER and IF he EVER calls again, you need to tell him 1. to STOP calling you 2. be firm that it is OVER and YOU have moved on (r... (read in full...)
My best friend wants to get me interested in his fetish thing?!?
Q. My male best friend who have known for the last 6 years He is into fetish wear and sex toys and games. He has confided in me and told me some info about his other life what interests him in this etc. He wants to get me now into it wearing outf...
A. 22 September 2019: There is such a thing as just saying:" no, thanks" if you are not interested.
I don't think you need to feel like you OWE your friend to do this.
And like YCBS suggests, if he is in between partners or has a partner who is not interested, he h... (read in full...)
I’m not sure if he is right for me with his way of life!
Q. I have a 'friend' who i havent seen in over 1 year we wernt really close but did have 'fun' times a couple of year back. He has got back in contact and wants to see if there could be a chance of a relationship. The thing is ive changed with what i ...
A. 22 September 2019: I think you need to realize that JUST like you, he like HIS own way of life and living. You just don't like the same things when it comes to design, expectation, clothing choices and level of hygiene.
You starting of with a "honey-do list" of... (read in full...)
Does she feel sorry for me or does she actually like me?
Q. I found out on facebook that my friend because friends with a female co worker who I’m into. I like her, I’m not sure if she’s only talking to me because she feels sorry for me or she actually likes me. I want to be friends with her on facebook. but ...
A. 21 September 2019: She doesn't know you well enough to "like you, like you" or feel sorry for you.
Keep drama out of the work place as much as you can.
TREAT her like a coworker, with professionalism, courtesy and polite interactions.
Most people will talk... (read in full...)
I feel so dumb! How do I handle this?
Q. Dear Cupid, My ex boyfriend and i have been dating again giving it another go. He says when he goes out that he doesnt acknowledge any other women and that he still acts like hes in realationship with me. Well for weeks hes been acting strange o...
A. 21 September 2019: OP, you two broke up for a reason. The reason was (I presume) because things weren't working out.
Now he is talking to another woman (as SOON as he hangs up the phone with you). And claim they are talking as friends. WHY on Earth is he discussi... (read in full...)
Should I confront him or break it off?
Q. I have been seeing him for just over two months. We have a great connection, the sex is amazing and we can talk for hours. We are comfortable around each other. It’s really great most of the time. I noticed when I started seeing him that he had ...
A. 21 September 2019: How does a guy like him (why doesn't sound physically appealing to be honest) CONTROL a younger and good looking girl? (like you) by taking her down a few notches. What he did say was that he felt you had a better connection than he did with his ex, ... (read in full...)
His disastrous ex keeps popping up and I can’t figure out why I’m being called jealous and insecure!?!
Q. the guy im crazy in love with has finally filed for his divorce and custody. his 12 year relationship, from an outsiders perspective i suppose, was pure insane. she cheated on him constantly with men and women, which is appearant just by looking ...
A. 20 September 2019: So here is the short and not so sweet answer.
SHE is the mother of his 2 children and will ALWAYS be part of their lives, ONE way or another. Since they live with him, she will ALWAYS be part of HIS life too.
They have a sick and toxic relati... (read in full...)
Should I stay or leave my mentally ill boyfriend?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for 6.5 years. I'm 29 and my boyfriend is 31. We met online and moved in with each other very quickly in a new town to both of us due to me getting a new job. There were some things I didnt know about my boyfriend until a ...
A. 20 September 2019: You know what to do, but you CHOOSE not to. Why is that?
The SENSIBLE and SMART thing would be to end it and kick him out (or move out yourself).
He WILL not change. YOU WISHING he would change or WANTING him to change isn't going to do SQUA... (read in full...)
Should I quietly delete him?
Q. I think i know what people will advise but its better that i hear it from other people and their views. I joined a dating site 4 month ago met a man had a few dates then he decided he wanted to be single he had split from his girlfriend 5 months ...
A. 19 September 2019: Yes, block his number, then delete and move on.
He wants you as a "back up" in case he doesn't find what he wants. Don't do that to yourself.
And yes, he might LIKE you, but he doesn't want to date you. So if you are looking to be dating, HE is... (read in full...)
Five years in, where is this going?
Q. Wow! So I haven't come here for advice in a very long time, I hope you're all well! Hmm I don't really know where to begin. I am nearly twenty seven and my partner is early forties, we have been together just over five years. We are currently re...
A. 17 September 2019: Why does HE get to choose where to buy a house? Is HE paying for the house? Will it be HIS house you live with him in?
You are 27 so IN your most FERTILE and sexual prime. He is (sorry) getting towards the DECLINE of his sexual prime. So you are ... (read in full...)
Why hasn't my crush ever sent me a friend request on facebook?
Q. I met this girl about a year ago through class. Both of us were in relationships at the time but there was attraction, I would even say she had a major crush on me but she was very shy. I was going to break up with my partner and leave my number ...
A. 16 September 2019: If your relationship has run it's course and your partner ins't interested in figuring out HOW you two can fix it, then walk away.
GIVE yourself some time to BE single afterwards.
Maybe take a good hard look at the last relationship and... (read in full...)
Does my gf cheat or just have a guy friend?
Q. Hi Everyone, I have a question to ask. My girlfriend and I have been dating for 9 months. We live in different towns about 10 miles apart. One of my good male friends works in that town also. My gf and I get together 3 or 4 days per week. We have ...
A. 16 September 2019: Thanks for your update.
My guess is SHE wanted a BF, he didn't want to commit. So she started dating you, but kept him around.
I'm sorry to say this, but I think you are her second choice. If he at ANY point in time suggested that THEY should... (read in full...)
I feel like I pushed my parents out of their home!
Q. Hi guys, i’m not sure where to begin but here goes, I’m an only child and very very close to my mum and dad, they are like my best friends and we’ve always had a real close bond. I’ve been with my girlfriend for 2 years now, she has 2 children, and ...
A. 16 September 2019: Are they happy with their new smaller home? If so, think of it as KEEPING this family house IN the family.
Mt brother and sister-in-law wanted to buy our grandmother's house when she passed but out aunt wanted more money and refused to sell it ... (read in full...)
How do I broach the subject of not wanting to get married?
Q. Ill try to keep this short and simple. The title probably sounds terrible. So, Im a 30F, my boyfriend is 7 years my senior. We both have children from previous relationships and we are both divorced. Ive known him nearly 2 years, but we only started ...
A. 16 September 2019: Again, JUST be honest. I can't offer that advice enough these days it seems.
Think about it, he's hinted at marriage a few times, you have AMPLE opportunity to now bring it up. I suggest that the conversation is for a time you two are alone (n... (read in full...)
I started a lie that my dad was dead before I met my boyfriend. I don't know how to tell him the truth
Q. I grew up with an abusive alcoholic father who would beat me, my mum and occasionally my younger brothers. I grew up with low self esteem and anxiety relating to this situation. At 14 my mum left him, he threatened to kill himself if we chose to ...
A. 16 September 2019: Your dad IS dead, TO YOU.
Honestly, I'd just tell him. GET it over with. Yes, I get there is a distinction of ACTUALLY being dead and dead to YOU.
I think with the background about your dad your BF will understand.... (read in full...)
Does my wanting to perform oral sex on a man make me Gay/Bi?
Q. Hello, I have posted here before about a similar issue but it never got resolved and the sexual idenity confusion cycle continued. My question is does my persistent fantasy of wanting to give another man oral sex make me gay/bi? In the past ...
A. 16 September 2019: Fantasies are not always "reality". You might fantasize about this UP until you actually try to make it happen. That is the thing about fantasies, you are in PERFECT control over the whole scenario, reality... is a whole other matter.
But the fact... (read in full...)
I really like the co-worker who I slept with but she's non committal and there's this other girl who's interested in me. What do I do?
Q. I’ll get right to it, I have a friend that’s also a coworker and we’ve been friends for years, and honestly I’ve always wanted more but haven’t expressed myself. Until recently, I expressed my feelings and we talked and it was just a line that we ...
A. 15 September 2019: Your coworker likes you well enough to have sex with you and hang out, but nothing more. That isn't really likely to change.
I have to ask, DO you think it's fair on the "new" girl to date her when she is really only a second option or a stand-in... (read in full...)
What should I tell the girl I'm seeing about my separation/ soon-to-be divorce?
Q. Hi Seeking advice. I have been separated from my ex wife for 12 m months now and have just applied for a divorce with the court hearing to be taken place in November. I have met someone, whom I really like and see it going somewhere. We ha...
A. 15 September 2019: Be honest.
You are STILL married, but in the PROCESS of getting the divorce finalized. YOU won't be "single" until the INK is dry on your divorce papers.
SO no DO NOT lie to the new girl and SAY you are divorced when you are not.
Tell her... (read in full...)
The Guy I'm Dating Apparently Abused His Ex Girlfriend. Should I Dump Him?
Q. So I met this guy on Tinder and I've been for a drink with him. It went pretty well and he's really attractive TBH (tall, dark, handsome, muscular, works in IT which I also do.) There are a few things about him that bug me a bit like it takes ag...
A. 15 September 2019: SPOT ON, Ciar!
... (read in full...)
My boyfriend seemed to celebrate me having a miscarriage
Q. My boyfriend secretly punched the air and celebrated after I had a miscarriage. Should I dump him for being so heartless? We’ve been together for 8 months and are both 20. Things were going fine and I genuinely thought he was the kindest, sweetes...
A. 14 September 2019: Absolutely agree Chigirl, well put.
I have a friend who at 16 got pregnant and had an abortion. While it DEFINITELY was what EVERYONE (family especially) thought was best for her - she STILL regrets it 35 years later. She still feels it was wron... (read in full...)
He's avoiding defining the relationship even though I know he likes me. How long should I keep patient?
Q. I have known this guy I am dating for only 2.5 months. I met him on vacation to Texas and then three weeks later, moved to Texas. Not to be with him but because the friends I was visiting allowed me to come live with them for a fresh start. Anyw...
A. 14 September 2019: Just slow down.
I would ask him though IF he considers the two of you exclusive or not. If he hew and hum over that question, then you know he isn't going to commit either.
While I'm not for "playing games" I would however be a little LESS av... (read in full...)
Does my gf cheat or just have a guy friend?
Q. Hi Everyone, I have a question to ask. My girlfriend and I have been dating for 9 months. We live in different towns about 10 miles apart. One of my good male friends works in that town also. My gf and I get together 3 or 4 days per week. We have ...
A. 13 September 2019: Did they know each other BEFORE you two started dating? If so, they might just be friends. If not, I'd be wary.
The fact that she has cancelled dated with YOU, her BF to go hang out with him makes me think that YOU are the 3rd wheel here. Doesn'... (read in full...)
Why hasn't my crush ever sent me a friend request on facebook?
Q. I met this girl about a year ago through class. Both of us were in relationships at the time but there was attraction, I would even say she had a major crush on me but she was very shy. I was going to break up with my partner and leave my number ...
A. 13 September 2019: No, she isn't hoping you will.
SHE is still in a relationship so pursuing you would be wrong, crush or no crush.
I think YOU need to look elsewhere.
... (read in full...)
The Guy I'm Dating Apparently Abused His Ex Girlfriend. Should I Dump Him?
Q. So I met this guy on Tinder and I've been for a drink with him. It went pretty well and he's really attractive TBH (tall, dark, handsome, muscular, works in IT which I also do.) There are a few things about him that bug me a bit like it takes ag...
A. 13 September 2019: First of all, abuse is flung around like a dime a dozen these days. EVERYTHING is abuse and "everyone" a victim.
There could be plenty of reasons why they broke up, you have already pointed out some of his behavior that you find a bit off-putt... (read in full...)
My boyfriend seemed to celebrate me having a miscarriage
Q. My boyfriend secretly punched the air and celebrated after I had a miscarriage. Should I dump him for being so heartless? We’ve been together for 8 months and are both 20. Things were going fine and I genuinely thought he was the kindest, sweetes...
A. 13 September 2019: He might NOT have celebrated the miscarriage, but the fact that HE isn't going to have to worry about having a kid or you having an abortion. NOT that it makes it better.
You could be jumping to conclusions as to why he was so "happy" after he... (read in full...)
My ex girlfriend's relationship with her brother in law seemed too cozy to me
Q. My ex gf 5yrs+ and I just recently broken up few days ago . Long story I went to go visit her for the second time at her place (long distance relationship ) stayed 3 weeks. The first week was hot romance and she couldn't get enough of me and than ...
A. 12 September 2019: Well, I guess it's a good thing it's over. Not wanting to kiss your BF of 5!! years when family is around is weird to me. I don't mean making out or snogging, just a kiss.
I'd DEFINITELY date someone you can see on a almost daily basis.... (read in full...)
Girlfriend and I went away together for a whole week and nothing happened sexually
Q. If you went away with your partner and you didn’t do anything in bed, would you consider that normal? It was a whole week and I never been so stressed, trying to plan things, make sure it’s all right, so it would of been nice to be intimate in our ...
A. 12 September 2019: Sounds like you two aren't that great of a fit.
Sure, intimacy should happen organically or naturally, BUT IT ISN'T! which is why people sometimes TALK about it.
I think it's a COP OUT for her to say she doesn't want to discuss it.
Obviousl... (read in full...)
My ex girlfriend's relationship with her brother in law seemed too cozy to me
Q. My ex gf 5yrs+ and I just recently broken up few days ago . Long story I went to go visit her for the second time at her place (long distance relationship ) stayed 3 weeks. The first week was hot romance and she couldn't get enough of me and than ...
A. 11 September 2019: I don't know.
I have a pretty good relationship with 2 of my brother-in-laws and there is NO WAY in HADES that I would cheat or anything remotely sexual with them. We do have banter and joke around but I see them as more BROTHERS than anything... (read in full...)
Girlfriend and I went away together for a whole week and nothing happened sexually
Q. If you went away with your partner and you didn’t do anything in bed, would you consider that normal? It was a whole week and I never been so stressed, trying to plan things, make sure it’s all right, so it would of been nice to be intimate in our ...
A. 11 September 2019: Talk to her?
None of us can read her mind (and neither can you). So you NEED to talk, ask questions and do it IN person.
Is it "normal" to want to sex it up when on a week-end away? Yes for most couples it is, I would venture a guess. Is it a r... (read in full...)
Should I stay with my long term partner or leave to travel?
Q. I have been with my partner for 4.5 years. I am 29 and he is 36. Over the summer I spent 4 weeks in Cambodia for a summer job, leading a team of teenagers in voluntary work to help deprived communities. I came home feeling empowered (I had no idea I ...
A. 10 September 2019: This is one of those conundrums that ONLY you can answer.
You two don't really want the same things (at least not at the same time) You have both invested 4 1/2 years into this relationship so I don't think HE is being unreasonable in wanting ... (read in full...)
My LDR boyfriend was angry that I lied so he broke up with me had sex with another girl so I could see what he felt like
Q. Okay so... been in a 1 year and 10 months (this past 4th) relationship I have a long distance relationship.... I know I know, what the point? It’ll never last, so some tell it. Around the beginning of spring I had planned to move in with my boyfr...
A. 10 September 2019: You need to STAY back home and cut all contact.
OP, this kind of "emotional blackmail" will have NO END. He will ALWAYS nitpick at ANYTHING you did (even before dating him) and use as ammo or "reason" for him to do whatever HE wants.
You did... (read in full...)
Am I right to feel let down by my friends?
Q. I've just had my 60th birthday. I feel very let down by 2 friends.Both sent me a brief text message on the day (one just said "happy birthday!" and nothing else). One of them hasn't phoned me or sent me a card (he's a male friend I've known f...
A. 9 September 2019: My dad forgot my birthday this year, I cut him some slack because 1. I don't really do the whole hoopla over birthdays and 2. he is old. My husband has forgotten it a few times too but again, don't mean THAT much to me. It's ONE day out of the ... (read in full...)
Does she see me a just a work colleague or a friend as well?
Q. a female student has started working at a company. I work for and has been with us for a month and a half. she’s funny, a bit of a barbie and not the brightest bulb in the lamp. despite this, she’s well liked by the staff. since she has started ...
A. 9 September 2019: Sorry you didn't get the answer you wanted.
No one is out to get you. What you got was advice BASED on what you wrote.
There are NO indications that she WANTS more than being polite. Sometimes you just don't get what YOU want.
That's life.... (read in full...)
My fiancé is being mean and ridiculous!
Q. Hey and thanks So my fiancé and I were planning a trip together. We had a disagreement and he said some nasty stuff to me. Called me names and actually threatened to rip my mouth off. I was shocked ! I couldn’t believe this man I’m supposed...
A. 9 September 2019: Wow, and you haven't ended your engagement yet?
Your focus in on the wrong end of the stick, OP. You shouldn't worry about canceling a flight but canceling that relationship and ANYTHING to do with this man!
I agree with AuntieBim that t... (read in full...)
Is it normal for a man to become nasty and aggressive over not having enough sex?
Q. is is normal for a man to become nasty and aggressive over not having enough sex because that is how my boyfriend is and I give him lots of sex five times a day every weekend. I feel like his constant pressure is starting to put me off him and sex ...
A. 9 September 2019: I don't think it's "normal" either. NOR is it OK.
What he is doing making you FEEL like sex is a punishment not something enjoyable to SHARE.
If he is your age (so 40+) he ought to know better than being an abusive sex pest. The thing is, it... (read in full...)
Does she see me a just a work colleague or a friend as well?
Q. a female student has started working at a company. I work for and has been with us for a month and a half. she’s funny, a bit of a barbie and not the brightest bulb in the lamp. despite this, she’s well liked by the staff. since she has started ...
A. 7 September 2019: ERRR
EDIT:
DON'T be creepy....... (read in full...)
Does she see me a just a work colleague or a friend as well?
Q. a female student has started working at a company. I work for and has been with us for a month and a half. she’s funny, a bit of a barbie and not the brightest bulb in the lamp. despite this, she’s well liked by the staff. since she has started ...
A. 7 September 2019: Look OP,
ID she wanted to get to know you better, SHE would try an initiate conversations with you, she hasn't, so TAKE that as a CLUE as to her NOT being interested.
Saying hello in the morning, fixing a cup of tea and saying see you later...... (read in full...)
Does she see me a just a work colleague or a friend as well?
Q. a female student has started working at a company. I work for and has been with us for a month and a half. she’s funny, a bit of a barbie and not the brightest bulb in the lamp. despite this, she’s well liked by the staff. since she has started ...
A. 6 September 2019: I think you should keep being polite and professional at work, NO MORE.
She is obviously much younger than you, and not interested.
You don't NEED to try and be her friend or Facebook friend.
If you want to make new friends, look for them o... (read in full...)
He's avoiding defining the relationship even though I know he likes me. How long should I keep patient?
Q. I have known this guy I am dating for only 2.5 months. I met him on vacation to Texas and then three weeks later, moved to Texas. Not to be with him but because the friends I was visiting allowed me to come live with them for a fresh start. Anyw...
A. 3 September 2019: Maybe he is just being "smart" here.
Honestly, If I had meet someone on vacation and they then moved to my state, I'd put on the breaks too. Especially someone who kind of was a holiday fling.
If I were you, I'd focus MORE on REBUILDING your ... (read in full...)
Should I confront him or break it off?
Q. I have been seeing him for just over two months. We have a great connection, the sex is amazing and we can talk for hours. We are comfortable around each other. It’s really great most of the time. I noticed when I started seeing him that he had ...
A. 19 August 2019: Why is it ANY of your business what he posted on his social media BEFORE he even met you?
Most people do not SCRUB their social media when meeting someone new. The EX is part of his life. One that he is hopefully done with. YOU stalking his ex's... (read in full...)
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