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*tudentOfLife agony aunt


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I'm a 23 year old student of life, I love and study every aspect of it. I seek to understand the world around me. I'm fascinated by how well human adapt to every situations that surrounds them.

Everything that we do wrong, it's because we don't know how to do it right. Sometimes, we think that we're doing things right but it's wrong. Why do we do it wrong? Because we don't understand it enough.

The economy crisis will bring a lot of change in the human world. Big empires will fall to give place to new ones.

I predict that we'll have a home base business boom. Why? Everyone seems to want "Financial Security" with the absence of it at work(due to the fragility of the economy), most will seek money elsewhere, and where can you work if nobody has money? You'll seek to make money on your own.

"Change brings opportunity"

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Where are the best places to meet guys who want a relationship?

Q.   Hi... I have been on this site for a couple months i think, used it before and have given advice. I just want to ask where are the best places to meet guys who want a relationship? I'm 28, with an Asian background and rarely meet guys, and dont ...

A.   30 November 2009: The best place I've found to me people of the other sex is at church and library. I also met one while waiting in line in a store. So basically, i'd say it's not about where to find them but more about having the guts to talk to them.... (read in full...)

Does anyone have tips on how to boost my confidence?

Q.   Helloo there. I have a really big problem well..i think it is anyway.. I have 2 problems that are abit annoying me atm.. okay so the first one is..I CANT stop going red..its so annoying..its like some1 has slapped my face like a 100 times..i go r...

A.   15 October 2009: My Dad use to tell me "Your teen years are your best years of your life!" I had acne, I was overweight, never had a girlfriend, was getting pushed around and it was supposed to be the best years of my life! Was I ever looking forward to what was... (read in full...)

Room mate is a male whore! Should I rat him out?

Q.   My roommate will screw anything that isn't moving, which is why our cat never lies down. Right now he is juggling 4 girlfriends and yesterday a new girl showed up and he had sex with her too, only he said she wasn't a girlfriend. That makes 5 ...

A.   13 October 2009: If she would like you, she wouldn't be messing around with your roommate. I'm quite sure those who go there for a fling do that with other men as well. I had this roommate who was doing the same thing than yours, he was coming at my door to sh... (read in full...)

I'm very lazy when it comes to sex

Q.   I am 22 and have been with my boyfriend whos 26 for 5 years....the problem is im very lazy when it comes to sex...he wants it everytime we see each other...but when i go to bed all i really want to do is sleep is this bad? my boyfriend is very ...

A.   9 October 2009: If there's nothing new to it, if it became somewhat a routine, It can be dull for one or both party. I think we all get in those at times, it's important to bring innovation in that department once in a while. I know that I'm usually more aroused ... (read in full...)

I'm worried I'll never find someone who wants to be with me.

Q.   Dear Cupid I split up with the love of my life 2 and half years ago. I'm now 22, nearly 23 and that was probably the hardedt thing in my life. We were only together a year and a half but he was my first love and I thought we would be together for ...

A.   23 September 2009: What are your beliefs? Do you have fate?... (read in full...)

Would you stay in a marriage where you aren't loved?

Q.   What are the signs that your husband loves you? I feel my husband does not love me, and i wonder, if you could describe, how you would feel loved. I just want to make sure I'm not mistaken ,when I think he does not love me. Because would you stay i...

A.   17 September 2009: I would stay in a marriage where I don't feel love because I've fell and got back in love with my partner in the past. Love got ups and downs, you have to make your decision when you're in a "up" and stick to them when you're in a "down". ... (read in full...)

I freeze when I try to tell him how I feel!

Q.   Hi, I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half. I was wondering how do you tell your boyfriend that you want to kiss passionatly, cuddle and to be sexual when I have a hard time talking about about my feelings. Also how would I work on ...

A.   16 September 2009: Can you define what kissing passionately is? Would you know how to do it if your boyfriend would be trying to do so with you? Maybe he thinks that he's already doing so, you'll have to really explain to him how you want to be kissed. Your feelings... (read in full...)

My sexual and drinking behavior is out of control and is now frightening me. Please help

Q.   Hello all. I am an attractive female with a nice ok regular life who does not have sex very much by choice, but then when I do, I tend to go nuts, and am worried about my behaviour, as I am indulging in sporadic risky, drunken threesom...

A.   14 September 2009: How's your spiritual life?... (read in full...)

My family hates me...

Q.   Everyone In My Family Hates Me! I'm boy from Devon and my parents keep arguing, I don't think they wan't divorce but its not nice. My brothers keep bullying me and Have an autistic brother. nearly everyday I cry because someone upsets me and no...

A.   1 September 2009: I went through a bit of the same thing as a child and I believe that its what made me the strong man I am today. I realize today that it wasn't because they hated me, they just didn't know how to handle themselves properly. Nobody was hurting ... (read in full...)

Lack of confidence and ideas, I want to surprise and treat my man.

Q.   I am in a relationship with the most loving and caring guy you would know. However in the bedroom he always takes the lead and control because I struggle to know what to do and get really self conscious. I was wondering if anyone had any ideas ...

A.   1 September 2009: I do like being in charge in the bedroom. I figure it can be the case for some men as well.... (read in full...)

I'm rubbish at socialising, how can I become more gregarious?

Q.   I am a 27 year old attractive male, with a good job, nice flat, my problem is I'm rubbish at socialising and making friends, people seem to find me awkward or boring and I don't know how to change this or if I ever will be able to? My gf even broke ...

A.   1 September 2009: The first chapter of the book "How I raised myself from failure to success by Frank Bettger" talks about how "being enthusiastic" changed his life around. It's the first chapter of the book, he went through something similar to you. I think yo... (read in full...)

Was I right to break my girlfriend's ex's leg and jaw because he used to hit her and cheat on her?

Q.   look im a 15 year old kick boxer. i been with this girl ever since elementry i really like her. I broke her ex boy friends jaw and leg because he cheated on her and he hit her a couple of times. am I right or wrong....

A.   28 August 2009: Resolving violence with more violence is like saying "These fries are too salty, I'll add more salt." I don't know how kick boxing is, but in karate you must never initiate combat, it's only for self defense.... (read in full...)

What should I do if my girlfriend is having phone sex with another guy?

Q.   She usually sends erotic messages to him right when he gets out of work. They are co-workers, so she knows his schedule. I found out she was sending him dirty stories about themselves and ones she would make up. How I found out was that she would be ...

A.   25 August 2009: Giving her some space, I find, is a very mature way to deal with this situation. Show her that she's free to make her own decisions for her life. If you make her feel like she's in a prison, she'll do like a prisoner and try to escape.... (read in full...)

How & where should I come out to my best friend?

Q.   Well, I'm an 18 year old girl and I've recently come to terms with the fact that i'm gay, or at least bi-sexual. But i can now acknowledge that I am attracted to females. I've realised that I'm in love with my female best friend, who is straight and ...

A.   25 August 2009: My best friend told me he was bisexual and admitted he loved me and he said that he knows I might not have the same feeling and it was okay, he just wanted to get his feelings out. He said it face to face and I liked his honesty, from that poi... (read in full...)

Does this count as rape?

Q.   I am a 20 year old male who has been screwing around with my 35 year old married neighbor for 5 years. She is a beautiful woman who has introduced me to many things sexually. She is very kinky and very persuasive. Over the years she has given me ...

A.   25 August 2009: If you feel that they did things against your consent, it is rape no matter what you've been doing before. ... (read in full...)

Is there anything I can do to stop sweating so much?

Q.   Okay - I enjoy sport and I play alot of it. Unfortuantely I also tend to sweat quite a bit so I end up with some pretty unattractive sweat marks and this is a little embarrassing! Would this be a real turn off to guys? Or if they are the sporting...

A.   24 August 2009: I don't find it unattractive and I never considered "sweating" being a problem.... (read in full...)

What are the chances of being pregnant if he came inside of me 3 times?

Q.   what are the chances of me being pregnant if the guy came inside me 3times? ...

A.   20 August 2009: Take a pregnancy test when you can.... (read in full...)

What are the chances of me being pregnant?

Q.   had sex with my boyfriend on sunday and have been expecting my periods between tuesday and this coming saturday. he tells me that there has been a 20% chance that he PARTLY "came on me". how lots are the chances of me becoming pregnant? please ...

A.   6 August 2009: If you have unprotected sex, there's always a chance to be pregnant even if he doesn't cum in you. There's sometime sperm in pre-cum that manage to get the woman pregnant. Stress can sometime delay the time you get periods, even if you're late it ... (read in full...)

I haven't had sex but I'm still worried I might be pregnant... what are the chances?

Q.   I'm 16 and have been going out with a guy for just over a year. We have never actually had sex, but he has lay on top of me when both our trousers have been off (underwear still on) and it is a possibility that wet could of touched wet and I hear ...

A.   6 August 2009: Stress can sometime create an irregularity with periods. I really doubt that the symptoms you describe are because you are pregnant. When I'm sick, I sometime try to look online to find my disease and it makes me feel like I have all of them. It... (read in full...)

If I fantasize about heterosexual sex and breasts, am I a lesbian?

Q.   I'm a 14 year old girl. When I masturbate, I often look at pictures of women. When I fantasize, I always think of a man and a woman having sex. I am neither of these people, nor do I identify with them. Although I usually make the girl about my ...

A.   5 August 2009: When I look at a adult video, I try to make myself feel what the guy is feeling when he's doing something on screen. I like woman but I don't like adult video about lesbian because I can't picture myself in the scene if there's no guy with them. So ... (read in full...)

Why haven't I gotten my period yet? We had unprotected sex but he never came!

Q.   okay , so i lost my virginity a day after my last period . it's been approximatly 32-34 days since then , since my period. the 1st time we ddnt use a condom , but he never came/finished. whats wrong? why havent i gotten my period??? :(...

A.   4 August 2009: There's sometime sperms in men's pre-cum that manage that can get a girl pregnant. A pregnancy test can help you answer that question. I did read somewhere here that stress can sometime delay periods, I would still take the pregnancy test j... (read in full...)

I can't move forward in my life with all these feelings I have for him!

Q.   Hi guys, first of all Id like to tell u that im gay, im feeling really down because me and my boyfriend broke up almost a month ago, he ended up with me in very hurtful terms telling me he didn´t love me anymore, added to this problem i have a bunch ...

A.   21 July 2009: Take control of your emotions. Emotions are controlled by you, not by outside sources, you decide if you're happy or not. It takes time to do so and help is often required, I have a few self-growth book that could help you out. Face your problems... (read in full...)

Question about Viagra...

Q.   Does anyone know if Viagra works for not getting an erection due to performance anxiety?...

A.   17 July 2009: Yes. Viagra is a drug, like any other drug the effects can't be controlled.... (read in full...)

My boyfriend is being unfair! I find it hard to orgasm with he has stopped trying!

Q.   My boyfriend and i have been going out for a couple of months now. We have been having some problems sexually as we have been finding it hard to make me cum, i can when im masturbating but not with him. Because of this my boyfriend has given up ...

A.   17 July 2009: He just doesn't know how to do it properly. With my girl, I sometime tell her how to "work it" and she does the same thing to me, you come to know each other when you do so. I don't see any other way than to talk to him about it, if he doesn't ... (read in full...)

Now I have gotten older guys don't seem to fancy me anymore!

Q.   When i was like 13-15 or 16 guys used to fancy me, but now i am 17 i don't think they do? and i have realised guys kinda hate me. does that mean i won't be in a relationship and what am i doing wrong and i'm scared? numerology say i am attr...

A.   17 July 2009: I used to think that everybody like me and that everything was perfect but that mindset slowly changed when I reached a certain point in my life. That point is called "Teen", that's when self-esteem comes into the picture. What I find is that the... (read in full...)

Does it sound like this relationship has reached a dead-end?

Q.   I've been with my boyfriend for over a year now It's been a difficult year, suffering from depression and having serious surgery he's stuck through it all with me. But a couple of months ago he said something to me and ever since then, its lik...

A.   14 July 2009: You might be the type of person who likes to hear compliments. You might feel love/accepted that way and he doesn't seem to be the type to say stuff like that to you (Judging by the text messages). It's usually something that can be fix easily e... (read in full...)

I think she still has deep feelings for her ex. Should I prepare for the worst?

Q.   I've been dating this wonderful girl for about a year and eight months. She used to screw around with another guy before we got together, even occasionally when she was in a relationship. When we started dating, she said that was over. So did he...

A.   14 July 2009: "Life is like a camera, what you focus on; you will develop". By going through her internet history, the only think you're growing inside of you is worry she'll leave for him. With every file you read, every picture you see, you're loosing trust. ... (read in full...)

I've got a new boyfriend, but I still think and dream about my ex. Why can't I move on?

Q.   Dear Cupid, i keep dreamin and thinkin aut my ex. I think about him a lot more than i do my current boyfriend. I dont know why though, my ex treated me like shit and is a horibble person but iwas in love wit him. It ended about two months ago and...

A.   14 July 2009: After a break-up it's best to take time before getting involve with someone else so that you can think things through. You might still be in love with your ex even if you're in this new relationship, a relationship is not a proof that you love that ... (read in full...)

I get performance anxiety when sleeping with someone for the first time. Would Viagra help? Should I try it?

Q.   i get really bad performance anxiety when im with someone new for the first time. it stops me getting an ersction. ive met a girl and feel like im really falling for her. would it be a good idea to use viagra for the first time I sleep with her? I ...

A.   13 July 2009: Is it possible that you might not feel entirely comfortable with the girl before having sex with her? I was having somewhat the same problem before I realized it was due of me not being comfortable enough and going too fast. Some people w... (read in full...)

In my 30's and still single and the future's not looking so bright either...

Q.   Is it strange being 30+ and never having a boyfriend and never being kissed . I have had a lot of rejection by guys and still paying after 11 yaers. I am very shy, quiet, low self estreem. I am also overweight, short, plain looking and not great pe...

A.   7 July 2009: I had the same problem and it was all related to self-esteem issue. Once I worked on that, it progressively got better. I was eating because I was fat, and I was fat because I was eating. I realized the cycle I was in once I build up my self-est... (read in full...)

Should I really believe my father after all he has put me through?

Q.   Hey, i was wondering if anyone can help as this is kind of very important and disturbing. Ok i was talking with my father one night and he started asking about my boyfriend, as he asked more questions he said he is related to a family with the ...

A.   7 July 2009: I have some relative that were cousins and god married. I was told that it could cause problem if you ever have kids because of DNA compabilities issue. It did in that situation for one of their kids (they have 3) but that's not necessary the ... (read in full...)

Is it ok to date your best friends brother?

Q.   Hi, needing some advice. Nothing has happened yet but I want to get some advice before it does so that maybe I have a better idea of what I'm doing. A few months ago my best friend went away abroad for a year - shes studying abroad. We're r...

A.   7 July 2009: Many friends of mine started relationships with sisters/brothers of their close friend and it turned out fine. It did kind of get awkward in one situation because the relationship ended bad. I doubt your friend would have something against ... (read in full...)

I cheated, I regret it, and I want her back!

Q.   im need of help my girlfriend of 5 yr also lived me as gone and left me she found out i cheated on her which ive said im sorry and i honestly do regret it she does mean the world to me and i just dont know why i cheated on her back in march and a ...

A.   7 July 2009: We often realize how much something mean to us only when we loose it. We often decide to change during those times too. Although your intentions might be better, it is not up to you anymore. The feeling of "He cheated" is the worse feeling so... (read in full...)

Why do men have a problem with me not being "lady like"

Q.   Im an full time auto mechanic and I love it but this really bugs my husband for no reason. Sometimes I do little remodels on our car just for fun or cause I'm bored and I usually take off my wedding band to do so (don't want to loss it). Then my ...

A.   6 July 2009: Your husband feel inferior to you because you have a bigger income than his. In "the old days" the man of the house was the one supplying the income. He might have grew up in a similar situation and feel uncomfortable/inferior because he's not ... (read in full...)

I feel I have to make myself sick after eating!

Q.   lately i've been making myself sick after anything i eat. i don't binge but feel i hav to make myself sick. i feel like i'm doing nothing wrong as i'm doing it to lose weight bu started doing it more lately due to stress. do i have a problem?...

A.   6 July 2009: By doing this, you're putting a lot of stress to your body which can cause problems eventually. If it wasn't a problem, you wouldn't have asked that question here. It might be a eating disorder called Anorexia. Here's what I've found online: T... (read in full...)

She says we shouldn't need physical contact all the time!

Q.   Hi all. So as the title suggests, all me and my partner seem to do is argue over things. We have been together 9 months and we both love each other very much, but its all starting to get a bit too much. Last night we had a row over how ofte...

A.   6 July 2009: "The five love languages" book by Gary Chapman could help you figure out how to deal with this situation like it helped in mine. Can a book help you? It did for me, the real question is "is she worth the reading?"... (read in full...)

Do girls enjoy anal sex?

Q.   I know this is a really weird question but, do girls enjoy anal sex and anal play?...

A.   3 July 2009: Like anything else, some do and some don't. They don't have any sexual sensitive spot or "G-spot" there like guys do though. The penetration and the idea "filthy" idea of it can be a turn on for some.... (read in full...)

I lied about being pregnant and took money to pay for medication. He found out and wants me to prove that I won't lie again. What should I do?

Q.   I was recently in a relationship, and we are now broken up for 6 days. It hurts more then anything. I have always been beaten in relationships so I have a very very hard time opening up to people. I was starting to open up to this guy a lot, because ...

A.   30 June 2009: There's no way to prove to someone that you will never lie again. You did a mistake and you should be forgive for it, not having to do something to prove that you won't do it again. When you do mistakes, you learn from them. How can you prov... (read in full...)

He told me he liked me whilst going out with other girls, now he's single he only wants to 'hook up', is he just after sex?

Q.   Hi, i'm 15. So theres this guy whos 16. We started off as friends. just talking. he had a girlfriend. then he said he liked me as more than a friend. but meanwhile he was still dating this other girl. he wanted to cheat on her but i didnt let him. ...

A.   30 June 2009: 1. Well if he cheated with you, while being with someone else, what makes you think that he won't cheat when he's going out with you? 2. I don't know about the sex part but he doesn't want to commit to one girl. 3. Move in the opposite directi... (read in full...)

How do I get my daughter to respect herself more?

Q.   How can help my daughter,to respect herself more? I see, she would do anything for getting a friend, including flattering and favors. I see she has some really nasty ''mean girls'' friend, who would never approve her,and she is endlessly running ...

A.   29 June 2009: As you know, teen years is a very confusing time for everybody. Only after reading self growth books was I able to put a bit of light into that confusing cloud. Since we don't always say everything to our parents, she might find answers to some ... (read in full...)

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