I'm so tired of the turbulence in our marriage; what should I do?
Q. hi everyone well i just am very confused, i thought that my husband loved me and lately i just feel like he doesnt, i mean i admit ive done something; but there not anything that i wouldnt of done before we got married like going out with my ...
A. 6 July 2007: I guess you should wait till he comes home. Then you should talk to him about all this. Your concerns are clear - please discuss it with your husband. Marriage requires efforts from both partners - this is normal.... (read in full...)
I want to break up with him, but he always seems to convince me not to
Q. i have been with my boyfriend for just over a year but want to split up with him because we have been having arguments for aout 7 months. I have tried splitting up with him several times but he always changes my mind andi give him one more chance ...
A. 5 July 2007: You need convince yourself that it is over. Before you have done it, don't talk to him. Having arguments for 7 months is not the reason to dump him. The reason as I view it is that you cannot stand it anymore. Probably you have some doubt n... (read in full...)
Are people who are jealous of me just bad people?
Q. I have been conditioned to feel very afraid of people who are jealous of me in some way. I use too much of imagination to develop some picture about the personality of that person who is jealous / judgemental to me in some manner. They are bad ...
A. 5 July 2007: People are not actually "good" or "bad". We use these words to express attitude. I will skip the part about jealousy to get to the point here. Your "need to be rejected outright" is based on expectations of their attitude to you, not how you see ... (read in full...)
I thought things might rekindle with my ex, but he hasnt called
Q. What Did This Mean? I have this ex bf that i always had a connection with. from the first time i met him i knew he was someone special. you see we dated 5 years ago and broke up after 8 months. then we were on and off up until 2 years ago. ...
A. 5 July 2007: You should not take it personally. "our timing was off when we dated" My opinion is that he thinks of you now as one of his friends. This may explain his attitude toward you and also his actions.... (read in full...)
I have to choose one of two friends, but I love both of them!
Q. im love with two guys and both are friends they know each other very well.the problem is i dont know which one to choose...
A. 5 July 2007: Too little information to answer this. Is there some difference between them? My advice: choose the one who is closer to your expectations. After you make your choice this situation may become more complicated then it is now, because "they know ... (read in full...)
We lost contact and now I want to see him again to tell him I love him
Q. I know that this must sound horrible, but I am unfortunetely desperate. There's a guy I've been good friends with for a long while, and I could even say that I love him. However, he's dating a girl that treats him horribly. Unfortunetely, I went ...
A. 4 July 2007: I think you can be good friends again.
There are two ways to accomplish this.
Either bring back memories of "you and him" or build it anew.
Speaking about "he's dating a girl that treats him horribly":
You may be right or wrong, but his opinion ... (read in full...)
She's not happy with her boyfriend and is sleeping with me; am I just wasting my time with her?
Q. ive been sleeping with a women ive knowen for a few years, i worked with her boyfriend for two years about 8 weeks ago we were in town we kissed and ever since then we have been having sex on a regular basis, ive spoken to her on a personal level, ...
A. 4 July 2007: Look at this from different angles.
First, I see that she is using you.
Second, she is cheating on her partner when sleeping with you.
As "shes been with him for 10 years", so she got used to this.
If she dumps him, can you be sure the pattern... (read in full...)
Is there any hope for the girl I fancy and I?
Q. hi, i recently told my friend i like her, and before the new gf came on the scene she seemed well into me, even when her gf was there she flirted with me, and one night after i told her how i felt she basically asked me to kissed her, i put it off ...
A. 4 July 2007: Dating friends may quite often be risky.
In your case the feelings are not mutual.
"she told me later into the night that she is in love with her girlfriend, but is into another girl, not me someone else"
And this should be combined with "she sa... (read in full...)
Should I be her friend again?
Q. dear cupid, Me and my best friend haven't fought for the few years weve been best friends and I mean best friends, like do everything together and tell each other everything but since about christmas we've been fighting none stop.. and I don't kn...
A. 4 July 2007: There is explanation for this situation.
I see signs of competition between you.
Your best friend cannot cope with her emotions in proper way.
Because of it you got all these fights for no obvious reason.
And if it lasts long, competition will... (read in full...)
I didnt like him all that much when we were together, but now that we are apart I am obsessed!
Q. Why am I thinking about him ALL the time (when I wake up / go to sleep, in dreams, eating, driving etc!) I used to kind of date this guy, and we really liked eachother but no way loved eachother / werent that affectionate, didn't last very long. ...
A. 3 July 2007: Such things you described are familiar.
Reason for this is that you did change.
Fast decision to dump him caused you feel the way you do now.
You will get over this only when you learn to understand that everyone is different and you should not c... (read in full...)
He asked my to be his girlfriend, but now is blowing me off
Q. I'm confused I should b sooo happy rite now, but i really don't know what i feel. Ive liked this guy for months now and we've been seeing eachother on and off for a while. Nothing had really happend between us for about a month, but last nite, we...
A. 3 July 2007: Look, you should not worry now at all.
The guy is probably a bit embarrassed.
You "asked to meet up twice in the same day" - he hesitates.
Maybe he just doesn't wanna rush things too fast, that's it.... (read in full...)
I'm hearing stories about him and I don't know what to believe
Q. Hi, I really need to know what i should do.I'm in a 9 month relationship with a guy that is older than me.I have done the last hing for him. At first my parents didnt approve of our relationship (our families had a fall out) and i ran away from home ...
A. 3 July 2007: First of all you should believe yourself.
Are the stories close to what you expect?
If answer is "yes", it's possible you misinterpret the facts.
If answer is "no", you should not be so influenced by others.
The attitude is caused by differ... (read in full...)
He can never make up his mind, it's driving me nuts!
Q. My boyfriend is the type of person who will take forever to make up his mind about something and lately it has gotten much worst and that really drives me nuts!I have tried everything from reverse psycology to threats to pressuring him and nothing ...
A. 3 July 2007: You say it you "can't take it any more".
However, you have been 7 years together.
I think there is some kind of contradiction in what you write.
Moreover, it all sounds like YOU want him to make up his mind.
Why do you wanna change the type ... (read in full...)
I'm in love with a bad boy with a girlfriend--how do I get him?
Q. Who loves bad boys? I do. lol I'm in love with this boy and have been for years--he was always playing hard to get, but I loved it really. It what made me like him even more, him making me chase him. The problem is we slept together and then car...
A. 2 July 2007: What is the feeling he has toward you? It is the question you need to answer. You say "his ex is back--we broke up and he is back with her". This situation makes it a bit more difficult for you to bring him back, but still you may get some chances... (read in full...)
Our relationship is still very new but I worry we don't talk enough?
Q. Hi Just one small question, have been with my gf for about a week properly now, and known her for a couple weeks more... During this week its gone long distance (because of the long uni holiday) and we have been talking on the phone every othe...
A. 2 July 2007: I think you talk enough with each other. You are concerned as this is new to you. At this stage of relationship you need keep talking regularly. Over time what you are talking about with your girfriend may become more important than how frequ... (read in full...)
My question is will I wait for him to call or should I be the one to make the move first?
Q. Just last night I had a fight with my boyfriend, for I did ask him about something and he did answer me but for my curiosity I asked him again and again, it's about a male friend of his who wanted to borrow money.... I accepted the fact that I did ...
A. 2 July 2007: As I understood you initiated the fight. He may be unwilling to talk to you now. Normally you should wait for him to call you, so please wait. If however he will not call after a week, then you call him.... (read in full...)
How can I get my ex to leave me alone?
Q. Hi. My name's Summer. I have an amazing boyfriend for 8 months now. I love him so much. I also have an ex boyfriend, who I have gotten over, and moved on..but recently, he's been calling me ( I don't know how he got my number, he says from a ...
A. 30 June 2007: He doesn't know where you live, does he?
The easiest you can do is change number.
You say: "don't know how to tell him to just leave me alone".
If you're gonna tell him, it means you have feelings for him.
Probably you should not talk to him at a... (read in full...)
My boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend
Q. Ok well my bf cheated on me with my bestfriend not even just once but like 4 times in like a few days and i found out obviously which he is also her ex boyfriend and she cheated on her boyfriend with mine but what do i do its hard for me to be mad ...
A. 30 June 2007: Okay, what is highlighted in this story.
The answer: "shes closer then a sister".
We got 2 ways to treat "bf cheated on me with my bestfriend":
#1 - if this is about cheating, then there is lack of trust.
#2 - if this is about "sister", then t... (read in full...)
I confronted her about using me and now she isn't speaking to me
Q. I liked this girl so much over 7months but known her for longer. She has always fancied my best mate. My best mate doesn't like her but she recently used me to talk to him like always calling me over than tellin him we're talkin and he should come. ...
A. 30 June 2007: Can't understand her motivation for using.
What she thinks is more important for you.
Maybe "she dont care and she's gonna let me suffer her love".
You'll get over her - the feeling of wasting time to remain.
However, it's also possible that yo... (read in full...)
He says he loves me but broke up with me to have time to think
Q. My boyfriend of two years broke up with me last night. I am very confused because he was just talking about how much he loves me and how he will never leave me. He told me I will hear from him in the next couple of days. I am upset he is asking ...
A. 30 June 2007: You say he is your boyfriend of two years.
Meaning you should know him better by now.
So what happened last night? Maybe you had a quarrel with him.
"he is asking me to wait for him but at the same time I know and understand he needs time to thin... (read in full...)
I still love my ex but I want to pursue a fling with another man
Q. dear agony aunt (hehe always wanted 2 put that) i have recently broken up with a guy but i am still in love him. i do not think anything more will happen there exept he still talks 2 me all the time and is so nice 2 me. i have recently been craving ...
A. 30 June 2007: Why did you break with the guy you love?
You say here that he is so nice to you.
If you did not want a relationship, you would not be with him.
But as you were with him, it means you that want relationship.
Now speaking about "someone i have ... (read in full...)
What does their behaviour mean?
Q. What does it mean when a lady touches you on your hand, shoulder, arm, body and strokes your hair, smiling at you, and tries to be close body contact towards you as well constantly looks at you? just wondering, because i encountered this...
A. 29 June 2007: This behavior means she is interested.
However, such interest is not serious.
You claim here that you are straight, but "encountered this before and always thought about what it always meant".
My advice to you is that you should have a closer loo... (read in full...)
I love the stimulating conversation with my teacher but I'm confused about where we stand
Q. I have been in love with my history teacher for three years now. I had him for one year (sophomore year) and afterwards I was a teacher's cadet for the other two. Since I was sixteen our relationship has grown a lot intellectually and emotionally, ...
A. 29 June 2007: "I know he has a girlfriend right now"
This is the most important point here.
Ask yourself whether you wanna break his and her relationship.
Your own answer to this question will tell what you should do.
Student-teacher relationship is ... (read in full...)
We've broken up but have to work closely together
Q. my girlfriend and i are currently both in the navy and on the same ship. we are on a 6 month deployment right now and she decided she needed a break from the relationship. its been really hard to stand by and watch her live her life like a single ...
A. 29 June 2007: Probably it means that she dumps you. Cannot move out due to circumstances. You are in the same boat and break may be understood as end. Now about "suggestions on how to survive the way things are". If you have to work closely together, then conc... (read in full...)
I'm lonely and want a boyfriend but I'm shy
Q. oh dear me. im such a loser. i know i have friends. but we never hang out. i dont have many guy friends because im too shy. my summer is going horrible and im too lonely. im in love with a guy who doesnt even know. and if he did know, he'd prolly...
A. 29 June 2007: Hard to get BF with such attitude. The question here is how long this situation lasts for you. If months, make over and insist on hanging out with friends. If years, you should look for new friends and new interests.... (read in full...)
Was it just a Summer fling, should I move on?
Q. I've been flirting with this girl for the last 2 months at school, and by the time things started heating up and i was about to ask her out, she leaves for camp and finds a boyfriend. I feel sorta angry. Should i just move on looking for other fish ...
A. 29 June 2007: The best for you will be to move on. It looks like she is not gonna wait. And you should not wait for her, because she is not worth it. Whether it is just a summer fling only time can tell you that.... (read in full...)
How do I make sure that it's me who he wants?
Q. well my bf and i have been going out for a week and my best friend likes him too well alot of girls like him so how do i make sure that he likes me for who i am not becasue i am one of the girls that like him? thax 4 the help...
A. 27 June 2007: Well huntess, I see there are others.
Meaning you may lose if you test him.
Okay, think what makes you different from girls who like him.
And try to emphasize some of those differences when with him.
Such things are "who you are", so if he l... (read in full...)
He seems to have stopped trying
Q. what does it mean when a guy knows that you like him that he all of a sudden sort of stops trying? i started seeing this guy 2 months ago and he would always text me and want to see me and always say i can;t wait to see you and now i always have to ...
A. 27 June 2007: I can guess here what it does mean.
There are two explanations for you.
First, after 2 months of efforts he may think it's your turn.
Second, he lost interest as you didn't react how he expected.
Advice: make a pause and let's see what he is g... (read in full...)
Really we are just roommates. Is it worth hanging on to?
Q. my boyfriend and I work different hours. He works night and I work day. For the first 2 years of our relationship it worked out fine, but the past two year have been a battle for me. We live together and spend a total of about 29 hours a week ...
A. 27 June 2007: How many years are you two together?
It sounds like twonty years together.
"For the first 2 years of our relationship it worked out fine"
This was "honeymoon period" - when you had honey and the moon.
At the moment you have bread and water - that... (read in full...)
He didn't feel the same so I started avoiding him; now he's acting strangely
Q. So I havent talked to this guy for about over a month. The reason I havent talked to him was because I like him but he dosen't feel the same way towards me so I decided to lose contact with him so that I could get over him. Well today I got on msn ...
A. 27 June 2007: Keep being friends with him for a while.
He doesn't feel the same way toward you.
What he actually feels should become clear to you pretty soon.
If it doesn't become clear, think that he is torn or confused.
Do not feel guilty as you are not t... (read in full...)
I don't think she loves me any more
Q. I've been dating this girl for 3 years now and the first 2 years of our relationship was the best 2 years of my life. We both work so its difficult to see each other but she has become bored of me i guess. like when we are together she doesnt want ...
A. 27 June 2007: Feelings are still there between you.
Your relationship became more stable.
"there has been so much drama and fights but its all gone"
"when we are together she doesnt want to go anywhere or do anything she just wants to do nothing".
T... (read in full...)
My fiance treats his sister the same as he treats me! I doubt anyone would be able to tell who he is actually in a relationship with!!
Q. My fiancee has a very close relationship with his sister if we are all together no one would be able to tell who is the sister and who is the girlfriend. I get very jealous as eveything he does with me he does with her and 9 out of 10 times when we ...
A. 27 June 2007: Probably you are overreacting here.
His sister is a part of his Family.
If you cannot put up with this fact, you should not marry.
Jealousy is close to the feeling of possession, by the way.
Why you compare yourself to his sisters is not c... (read in full...)
He's worried about the age difference, should I just end it?
Q. i am 16 turning 17 and i met a guy at a party. he is 21 turning 22 in 4 months. we have gone out a few times and i am beggininng to like him alot but i know he is freaked out about the age difference. sometimes he says it doesnt matter but other ...
A. 26 June 2007: You are younger than he: time is yours. I mean you got more time for decisions. Well, you can break with him, but is it what you really want? Probably the best would be to keep it a bit slow for a while. Now about "do i see what is going to happe... (read in full...)
She says she's confused, while I'm just hurting
Q. me and my girlfriend were dating for almost three months, and then we took a break. i still love her very much and really wish to go back out with her. she still loves me too and she even told me that she still loves me, the only problem is she's ...
A. 26 June 2007: Maybe she just wants to be popular. You say nine other people like her. She is not looking for a proper commitment at this moment. I guess it is possible for you to bring her back eventually, but maybe she will not treat you exactly like her boy... (read in full...)
How can I make him trust me so we can have a relationship?
Q. Dear Cupids I have a very frustrating relationship with my current "friend with benefits" I like this man, and want a real relationship with him, however he tells me that he won't let anyone in and won't trust anyone because he's been hurt too ma...
A. 26 June 2007: Think why you are "friends with benefits". Probably hes got some emotional problems. "he won't let anyone in and won't trust anyone because he's been hurt too many times". When such people enter a new relationship before complete recovery, it's ... (read in full...)
My ex says she misses me and I think I feel the same but I have a new love interest
Q. My ex and I had a rough going of separate ways. After a month she has contacted me and told me that she misses me. I am currently seeing another woman... although not my girlfriend, we have went on a few dates. My ex has quite the past in drug...
A. 26 June 2007: Hello mate! Past means history. We are not here to judge people. Question "what is right" is philosophical: nobody is perfect. You need to focus on the present - your feelings as of today. Decide with which of two you would like to share your fut... (read in full...)
My fiance gets angry that I don't perform oral sex well enough
Q. My fiance is constantly complaining that i am not satisfying him sexually. he gets really angry that when i perform oral sex on him, i don't do it to his liking. he says that i do not satisfy him the way he satisfies me, and i am selfish. could you ...
A. 26 June 2007: Do you base your relationship on sex? There must be something else in this. If not, then it will hardly last for a long period of time. You sound so determined: "i want this relationship to work". Just sit together and discuss what each o... (read in full...)
I'm not sure where my relationship is going
Q. im not sure wat to do at the moment, ive been casually with this guy for about 9 months now and not sure where its going. i no many of ye out there no how im feeling but for some reason i think this time may be different. we get on well and ...
A. 26 June 2007: What do you expect out of it yourself? It's going nowhere as you can't answer. After nine months in a relationship you should know answers. You say: "im in two minds either i walk away and break all contact or tell him straight out now or neve... (read in full...)
We are more off than on--can I make this work?
Q. Dear cupid, I have been seeing this guy, on and off for four years now. Every year, we get together for about a week, then stop speaking for the rest of the year. These weeks are usually the highlight of my year. I think I am in love with him, b...
A. 25 June 2007: This sounds like another love story.
You can make it work, but you won't.
Personally I don't believe that you will actually ask him out.
After four years you and him adapted to a such "relationship".
Here it is: "These weeks are usually the high... (read in full...)
I broke up with my BF 3 weeks ago... I think I now also need to end the friendship! Help!
Q. I recently broke up with my boyfriend of three years because I just didn't know if he was the one for me. I just wanted some time for myself to think things through. And of course, to have some fun while I am single. We have been broken up for only ...
A. 25 June 2007: I think you are moving too fast now.
Do you know who is the one for you?
Maybe you like this new guy, but do not rush things with him.
Probably you will not call it a relationship if you date him.
Anyway, this is not a reason to terminate friend... (read in full...)
She wants her space! How can she turn off her feelings so suddenly?
Q. Hi all, Me and my ex have both just graduated from university, we have been together for about 2 1/2 months, although we have known each other since the beginning but i was to shy to make a move until now. Now uni has finished she is going back home ...
A. 25 June 2007: You should understand it was a fling.
There are girls who tell you stories.
For instance, like this: "She says she still loves me and this might not have happened if the summer had'nt arrived".
"I really want to speak to her and ask what changed... (read in full...)
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