She wants her space! How can she turn off her feelings so suddenly?
Q. Hi all, Me and my ex have both just graduated from university, we have been together for about 2 1/2 months, although we have known each other since the beginning but i was to shy to make a move until now. Now uni has finished she is going back home ...
A. 25 June 2007: You should understand it was a fling.
There are girls who tell you stories.
For instance, like this: "She says she still loves me and this might not have happened if the summer had'nt arrived".
"I really want to speak to her and ask what changed... (read in full...)
Will my crush on my teacher ever go away?
Q. I've posted on here sveral times bout this teacher hu i really fancy! I've been browsin the site and hav been looking into other ppl's posts with a similar problem as me. Anywayz, alot of the the advice seys dat it will pass over in time! I've been ...
A. 25 June 2007: Let's talk about crushes here again.
We can have this feeling at any age.
However, over time most people learn how to deal with a crush.
Normally a crush lasts only several months, and then it fades.
You feel "the pain is gettin greater" - I gue... (read in full...)
My married bf has no time for me, now and I'm depressed about it! What can I do?
Q. Hi friends I am married and after my 1st child born, i love to someone in my office in first sight love. Till now I am in love with him (means 12 years now) I love him so much and he also love me too. I don't know why I do not have any kind of...
A. 25 June 2007: Something is omitted in this story.
Why do you stay with your husband?
You say: "I do not have any kind of feelings with my husband".
"I want to be with my lover only but that is impossible" - ?!
Probably you need counseling - it's a result of... (read in full...)
I bumped into an ex of mine and now I can't get him off my mind! Help!
Q. I bumped into an ex-boyfriend a couple of days ago and I can't get him out of my head, I just want to see him again. However, I'm in a serious six year relationship with a wonderful and caring person who I do love. I just don't understand why I'm ...
A. 23 June 2007: Think about what you feel to your ex.
It sounds to me like this is a crush.
Why should you break a real Commitment for past and a crush?
You are in "relationship with a wonderful and caring person".
As these are your own words, probably you sho... (read in full...)
I like her and just when I was gonna tell her how I felt, I found out she likes someone else!
Q. Just when I was ready to tell her how I feel about her. My friend comes up to me and tells me that she likes another guy in school. Her school since we don't attend the same one. Probably why she is trying to graduate Highschool early. She is one of ...
A. 23 June 2007: If you tell her now, you will suffer.
She will stay with the guy she likes.
More complications may arise: you may no longer be her friend.
And who knows maybe she wants you to compete with one another.
Chill out and don't rush things with her ... (read in full...)
He's spending more time with his brother than with me and our baby
Q. My boyfriend keeps choosing to hang out with his brother,and leaving me and our 4 month old son at my mothers.What can I do to stop this?He is with his brother more than he is with us..Is it me or is he afraid of bonding with our son?He never helps ...
A. 23 June 2007: Your boyfriend has inadequate priorities.
He should be spending time with you now.
From international perspective your case doesn't look typical.
And the point here is that the problem lies in your Community.
"Me and his brother do not get along... (read in full...)
I ended my long distance relationship for a new one but I miss my ex
Q. Ok, so i was with my ex boyfriend for about 4 years. We were high school sweethearts. I mean i gave my all to this guy! I was young and yes i'm a flirt but i never cheated on him. During our second year i moved to a different state and i asked ...
A. 23 June 2007: My advice is: stay with the new guy.
Experience is a part of who you are.
You were lucky in past and life showed you a cheesecake smile.
There was a feeling like this can last forever, but what left?
"I need some sense knocked into me" - Relat... (read in full...)
I don't bear pressure well and he thinks I'm weak
Q. I just wanted to know if you could possibly help me I am despreate. I can not control my emotions. When my boyfriend and I get into an arguement and I feel I am being pressured I start to cry. He doesnt like that he thinks that is weak. He does not ...
A. 23 June 2007: Why do we need to experience weakness? It helps us to learn what is strength. The same is true about emotions - you learn to control them. Speaking about pressure you feel: what is being pressurized? Your "inner world" is obviously the answer t... (read in full...)
She's with an abusive man for financial reasons; do I have a chance?
Q. My question is, would a girl that is in a abusive relationship leave if the right man came along? I've been seeing a girl in a long term abusive relationship for a few months now and she has started telling me that she loves me and that she woul...
A. 23 June 2007: This is a very sad story as I view it. It means she is using you emotionally. She will say to everyone that she is in abusive relationship. However, she is five years with him and agrees to stay there. Chances that she leaves him to be with y... (read in full...)
My girlfriend has been sending dirty texts to my work mate! What should I do?
Q. my girlfiend of 16 years who i have 2 children with, the first 13 years old and 7 years old has been texting dirty texts to one of her ex workmates. she had his number under a friends name on her mobile. he asked her to call him after she was ...
A. 23 June 2007: I cannot grasp why you are not married. Anyway, your GF is not commited to you. Her actions you described should be classified as cheating. "She claims it was a laugh" - Only if you both think alike. "I am devastated and feel like i canno... (read in full...)
I get shy when I really like someone
Q. ok, so I really like this guy...we made out last week after we went out clubbing, and we haven't mentioned it since...i get really weird when things like this happen because i'm just really shy and am intimidated when i really like ...
A. 22 June 2007: Okay, tomorrow is the last day of class.
Come to him and say: "I am missing you".
I am sure that he will have to say something to reply to you.
When talking to him don't use words "love" or "like" for now.
You are really shy, he is really shy - ... (read in full...)
We've hit a wall in conversation
Q. I feel like I am losing the girl I love. We use to talk and talk. It was pretty much anything about our lives. Now after only months of doin this, I feel liek I hav noting else to talk to her about. I love talking to her. Hearing her voice. I just ...
A. 22 June 2007: When you throw a ball what you expect? You want someone throw it back to you. This simplification helps to see what a Conversation is about. So what does it mean when the ball does not come back to you? It means that either game is over or you ... (read in full...)
He seemed keen but after a misunderstanding, he's ignoring me
Q. On the 9th of june this year me and my friend kinda started holding hands together meanwhile i was goin out with his best m8 who i liked quite abit but not as much as this guy. That night he texted me and sed that if things dont work out tween me...
A. 22 June 2007: All this sounds to me like a love story. It is not about a guy and a best friend. What is it about then? This story is a part of your journal. Back to you "lets not do anything together for a long time". You know, probably there will be some kind... (read in full...)
He dumped me but said he hadn't cheated; I don't know what to believe
Q. My ex finished with me a while ago and something keeps playing on my mind. When he got together with me, he said he would never cheat on me because he knew how bad he had been feeling when he discovered his ex, who he was engaged to be married to, ...
A. 22 June 2007: He did dump you as a matter of fact. Why are you thinking about him now? I do not think that it's important whether he cheated on you. More reasonable for you now is to move on with your own life. Past is history; there is nothing about future in... (read in full...)
Am I too young to really be in love with her?
Q. So many say I am too young to feel love. I would lke to know when it isn't so young. how will I know I love someone. Cause I feel something toward a girl. I talk to her when she feels down. I don't let her pay for anythign when we hang out. I think ...
A. 22 June 2007: This question is too philosophical. It should be psychological instead. Speaking about age range 14 to 21 - there is a lot in common. Priorities are to sort: what is more important, what is less. Definition of Love is unique for every person,... (read in full...)
We're in love but her step dad doesn't like me
Q. I'm in a similar situation. I love my 32 year old cousin's daughter. i didn't even know my 32 year old cousin was my cousin. Well my cousin's daughter is my age and she loves me too, we love each other so much. I don't know what to do my parents ...
A. 21 June 2007: At the moment you should not do anything.
How can you know it is not just a crush?
"is my age and she loves me too, we love each other so much"
Probably you need time to test your feelings to one another.
You both decide whom you should tell when... (read in full...)
I really like this girl. How do I find out more about her without being too obvious?
Q. I really like this girl. I just need some advice on how i can talk to her more, find out what she's interested in? How do i do that without being too obvious. We are goin out on a date, but i want to know her bit more and make her feel really easy ...
A. 21 June 2007: Listen, you are going out on a date.
It is your first date with this girl.
This is based on first impression that you "like this girl".
Why should you rush things to risk a potential relationship?
And there is risk if you look for similarities... (read in full...)
I don't want to leave him but I want to experience more freedom
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for almost a year now, and he's been wonderful to me, we even have plans of moving together in about a year... After three months of dating, I cheated on him with a guy I used to be in love with, but he turned out to...
A. 21 June 2007: You have doubts - it is not decision time.
This is what you want rather than will do.
"I'm just not sure if I'll be able to fight my desires if the opportunity to realise any of my fantasies comes up".
Such fantasies are part of who you are - th... (read in full...)
I'm in love with my friend and I'm jealous of another guy
Q. Ok, I like my friend. I think she is the most beautiful prson on earth. Problem is that I don't want to ruin our friendship. Since I can't seem to tell her, I've been getting more jelous. I am not the guy who feels jealous. So it is my first time ...
A. 21 June 2007: So you can't tell her you love her.
This may be a problem in your case.
As she doesn't know how you feel, she acts as if she is free.
You are not in relationship and you misinterpret her actions.
I think you are feeling this, because you lack... (read in full...)
I'm falling for him, but Im his first, what if he wants to date around a bit!?
Q. Hello again. My boyfriend and I have been going out for almost 2 months, and his friends say I'm his first grlfriend. The problem is, I've been in quite a few relationships, and he's still new to the whole thing, but my feelings for him just get...
A. 21 June 2007: "gain a little more experience first"
Who is thinking about it: he or you?
It sounds like you are expecting him to think of it, but why?
You have been going out for almost 2 months as you say here.
So if you still do not trust him, maybe you s... (read in full...)
He's acting strangely around his friends; is it because of me?
Q. Okay, so my boyfriend has been kind of acting really weird around his friends, but he seems completely normal when he's talking to me, and I'm afraid I might have something to do with it, since he has been spending a lot of time with me, and less ...
A. 21 June 2007: I guess they are his friends, not yours.
So why you worry how he acts with them.
Do not even think of it unless you wanna befriend any of them.
Or maybe that is what you want? - It is not clear from the qt.
"I might have something to do ... (read in full...)
Any tips on how to get over a 2 year relationship?
Q. whats the best way to get over a guy that youve dated for a couple of years (3)? advice please!!!...
A. 20 June 2007: Dress in black, lie down and cry. After that come out and have fun. Repeat these 2 activities for a while to achieve the effect. Forsee you asking what is the real meaning behind this story. Here it is: You cry due to him and you can cry without him,... (read in full...)
I know he doesn't fancy me so why is he meeting up with me all the time?
Q. hi im 14 and im really in love with this boy we've been meeting up for a thew months now and hes the first boy that ive really fallen for. most weekend nights i sneak out of my house at 11 and go down his till about 3 in the morning. but it seems ...
A. 20 June 2007: I can't see how he may be using you. What I do see is desire to dump him. You are not in "appropriate relationship" as you imagine it. This is said to "everyone" on purpose I believe it is false: "he keeps telling everyone i know that he does not... (read in full...)
I'm 20 and never been kissed or had a bf! Any advice?
Q. Hi, im 20 years old and have never had a boyfriend nor been kissed...I keep telling myself its God's will or that the time will come. Yet I really dont understand. I dont think its my looks since people keep telling me im good looking (and i mean ...
A. 20 June 2007: Do you have any male friends as such? This is the key question in your case. If yes, think about why none of them is a potential boyfriend. Maybe you are around wrong guys or your expectations are high. If no, your girl friends are likely to ... (read in full...)
Should I try to pursue a friendship? What does his odd behavior mean?
Q. I started dating this guy and things were going well for a while, but then he asked me not to leave him. The problem is that I knew that I was going to move, and I didn't want to not tell him. I felt that that would be too deceitful. We broke up ...
A. 20 June 2007: You should try to pursue a friendship. As I understood both of you want this. "when he sees me he stares for a while and looks hurt" He stares at you, it means that he is interested in you. But why he looks hurt? Maybe there is something botheri... (read in full...)
We both want to kiss eachother but we're both to scared to make the first move!
Q. There is a guy I like. He is friends with a friend of mine. He has been known to get around a bit in the past but apparently around me he is shy and nervous. He wants to kiss me, I want to kiss him but neither of us can make the first move. His ...
A. 18 June 2007: Girl, go learn guy body language.
"around me he is shy and nervous"
There is a thing called Intuition: you should use it at times.
"we don't know each other really well but if we... get to know each other more then maybe he will want more"
You h... (read in full...)
I'm dating my boss but he went away to Mexico and when he came back, he had changed! Any advice?
Q. ok i am dating my boss first of all and has been awsome over the last few months about three weeks ago he had to go to mexico for a buisness trip every since he got back he has been completely diffrent, you know not calling as much we cant really ...
A. 18 June 2007: Something sounds wrong in this story.
What to do depends on what you expect.
Do you wanna marry boss or maybe you want him to promote you?
Unfortunately, such things have little reference to real life.
"this guy that i had a huge crush on for lik... (read in full...)
Absolutly head over heels for my girl, but I know she's been cheating. What should I do?
Q. Ladies any advice will do. Well here it goes well i'm a male in my 20's who for the last 2 years have been in a realanship on and OFF. I'm madly in luv with this girl, the problem is that she walks in and out of my life 4 the last two years. I know ...
A. 18 June 2007: You tried to forget her, but you cannot.
It means that you should not do it now.
Some girls have a rather strange attitude to a relationship.
It is difficult for them to express this part of themselves.
Let's think of "She treats me like crap and... (read in full...)
How can I tell if he likes me?
Q. Hey, Okay so heres the deal, I have this guy who I like alot!! and really want to have a bf gf relationship with him, but I'm not entirely sure if he likes me, and want to be able to read the messages before sending out the charm and real signals....
A. 18 June 2007: First, I think this question is not naive.
Second, thanks to those who deserve them.
"I'm not entirely sure if he likes me" - this is quite normal.
We are not sure about many things in life, but we keep living.
As to "some guys do that to almos... (read in full...)
I fancy the deputy heads daughter!
Q. (can't spell) there is a girl at my school and i fancy her but she thinks i've got over her and i havn't. what makes this more complicated is that she is the deputy heads daughter and he is stricked. what should i do? were both 16 if that changes ...
A. 18 June 2007: "she thinks i've got over her and i havn't"
It is the most important part in your post.
You are probably fancying her in one of the following ways:
#1 - she is so much beautiful, she turns you on physically;
#2 - thinking about her all the time... (read in full...)
I feel so insecure, how do I "find myself" again?
Q. My girlfriend finished our relationship on sunday and i am heart broken, i opened up to her so much and let down all my guards. i felt used and hurt because i gave her my all. we argue all the time because she has a short temper and no matter what i ...
A. 16 June 2007: I feel your girlfriend is using you.
She did not finish your relationship.
At the moment she is grooming you - I know this type of girl.
To dump her is not possible for you now she will not "get it".
First, don't focus on your issues as she wi... (read in full...)
How do I get over him now he's getting engaged??
Q. hello, I need help... It's been a year since my boyfriend of 6 years and i broke up. I know it's been long but i miss him like crazy. We did continue to sleep together a couple of times after even though he had a new gf.. yes i know it's bad but ...
A. 16 June 2007: There are two ways to deal with this.
Are you sure you will never see him?
If you say "yes", then cross him out of your life and move on.
However, if you say "no" - make a pause till they get married.
You may get chance to make friends with bot... (read in full...)
I thought I wanted to marry my boyfriend but since he asked me, I am not interested in marrying him anymore.
Q. I thought I wanted to marry my boyfriend but since he asked me, I am not interested in marrying him anymore. We have a baby together, a 2 month old. I thought it was kind of crappy on his part that he never brought it up, us getting married....
A. 16 June 2007: Looks like he has inadequate priorities.
This has nothing to do with his shyness.
"he looked like a fool because he was all shy when he said it"
Actions may be interpreted differently - it is not the point.
Here is the point: Does he care eno... (read in full...)
Me and my fiance just got engaged a few weeks ago and ever since she doesn't want to have sex with me.
Q. Me and my fiance just got engaged a few weeks ago and ever since she doesn't want to have sex with me. We always had a good sex life, or at least I did and I spent hours giving foreplay to her before we made love, and I was always under the ...
A. 16 June 2007: You will have to confront her ASAP.
It may turn out she manipulates you.
Skip "I was always under the impression that she enjoyed it".
Take some time to cool down and think about her as a person.
Discard emotions, does she give an impression "a... (read in full...)
Is it wrong for me to feel like the love i had for one person is fading away while the love for another person is increasing?
Q. Is it wrong for me to feel like the love i had for one person is fading away while the love for another person is increasing? Me and baby daddy been having problem every since i had our child which have been seven months. We been arguing none ...
A. 16 June 2007: This situation does happen in life. And there is nothing wrong for you. Over time many people learn to cope with several commitments. Sounds like both men will occupy some place within your heart. "I love my baby daddy but i really love my ex" -... (read in full...)
What can I do to romantically spice up our relationship?
Q. How do I get out of the routine with my 16 year old girlfriend? I want to do something romantic for her?...
A. 16 June 2007: Well, your intentions are understood. The question: is she a romantic girl? You state that you stuck in the routine with your girlfriend. First, you should ask her whether SHE wants to get out of it. If she says clear "yes", start with flowers ... (read in full...)
I'm getting mixed messages, does he like me?
Q. Hey Im 17 and i've just come out of a year long relationship with someone. Back in February i met this really nice guy i met at a party, he was very drunk and spend the whole evening telling me i looked amazingly beautiful. I really liked him...
A. 16 June 2007: I think this guy liked you at first. He cuddled up to you in that cinema. Then there was some kind of misunderstanding between you two. Both you and him were sending mixed messages to one another. Now about "hes going away to university in Sept... (read in full...)
Lost all my friends because of my partner! I am so alone..what can I do?
Q. I have been with my partner for nearly 8years, their is a 14 year age gap between us. When we first got togerther my close friends disaproved of our relationship which meant i lost allot of them. the freinds i did have left were mainly men which my ...
A. 15 June 2007: Now it is really embarrassing for you.
I do understand how you feel and why.
There are some rules for age difference relationship in fact.
And the most important among them is that to make this type of relationship work both partners need to be e... (read in full...)
He liked someone else and it was embarrassing to be knocked back like that! Any advice?
Q. hey why do men always mess with my head? i went out to a club last week with some friends from work and one friend called Dan kept coming onto me and tried to come home with me but im not like that so i made excuses. i didnt kiss him or anything ...
A. 15 June 2007: "how should i act with him at work tonight?"
You should act as if nothing has happened.
In case that you wanna make it work between you in the future.
There was some misunderstanding between you in club, so what?
"horrible watching him try... (read in full...)
Why do I feel a compelling need to justify any action that could be labelled as selfish?
Q. Why do I feel a compelling need to justify any action that could be labelled as selfish? Is there anything wrong about satisfying your own needs if your caretakers don't do a justice or are rigid / restrictive about what should be your needs ideally ...
A. 15 June 2007: Okay, I see that this question is tricky.
And it is here to impose certain beliefs.
"your caretakers don't do a justice or are rigid / restrictive about what should be your needs ideally rather than giving importance to what are your needs really" ... (read in full...)
Is he likely to leave me to be with his children?
Q. I've been with my partner for 2 years now. We lived together but he had to move back to another part of the country. I followed as he said we would get a place together. He has now said he can't move in until his children (living with his ex-wife) ...
A. 15 June 2007: There is a place for each of us - Home.
I speak about the widest meaning of it.
People who do not understand it - they are traveling in life.
For them Life is a journey and they sail looking for a haven.
Sounds like you have different sense ... (read in full...)
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