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*arbo

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Our sex life is non existent

Q.   Me and my gf sex life is non existent. Sometimes I look forward to it and it can be over so soon. No foreplay happens, she doesn’t let me go anywhere near her for foreplay. She used to be really wild, and now it’s gone to nothing. I’m still up for ...

A.   20 May 2018: If she is rushing into the inter course it must be because it feels good whatever you are doing. If it feels good for her, then there is no way you are inadequate. What you are complaining about is her input into foreplay, which is what you want out ... (read in full...)

Does he have a disorder or is he just a liar?

Q.   Hello i have a question, i have been dating this guy for 3 months but am confused about his character.The first time met him, he told he was born Jan 30th, the next time i asked he said 20th feb 1979 i asked to see his Id it was 1th Jan 1978. Last ...

A.   19 May 2018: He could be both — compulsive and habitual liar. Compulsives lie out of anxiety that the true answer would somehow screw up the situation for someone involved it it, and that could turn into habitual because it relieves his anxiety. Lies are hard to ... (read in full...)

Does anyone have any tips on mental health?

Q.   Hello aunts I realize this is not a relationship question but I have been diagnosed with ocd/ rumination (excessive) to the point where I get horrible tension headaches and panick. I am a prisoner of my mind and I go and recheck things and ...

A.   19 May 2018: If you are looking for natural supplement ideas, you should ask this question on Reddit.com in the Supplements forum where there are thousands of users with various experiences in what you have and what you are asking for. ... (read in full...)

Do I give my ex with a drinking problem a second chance?

Q.   Do I give my ex with a drinking problem a second chance? I had been with my boyfriend for about 11 months now and I recently decided to end our relationship because of his drinking habit. I wasn't happy about his drinking early on but I t...

A.   16 May 2018: You describe a lot about your feelings about drinking. Alcoholics of any kind rarely care about your feelings, especially if they stand in the way of them getting drunk. You felt that when he told you off not to dictate his life - meaning stand ... (read in full...)

My ex-girlfriend's confession has re-opened old wounds

Q.   My girlfriend of close to 3 years split up with me a couple of months ago. It felt like a total blindside because I never saw it coming. I haven't taken it well. I've dealt with significant anxiety and depression since. I had asked extensivel...

A.   13 May 2018: This woman does not know what she wants in life. Had you mattered to her, she would not have dumped you for a married man with whom, she knew, has no future. Don’t allow yourself to be swayed by her segmental gimmicks. You should go no contact with ... (read in full...)

Should I ignore the photos found on his laptop?

Q.   Hi there I was looking for a movie on my husband's laptop and instead found a folder of celebrity nudes he downloaded at the same time. I'm a bit shaken. I don't mind if he watches porn, but most of these photos are ones which would have been ...

A.   29 April 2018: I would let that one go. Gawking at them will in no way destroy your relationship. Bringing it up, on the other hand, may cause turmoil, and it will be over something that has no impact otherwise. Battling the morality of this issue is like trying ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend can't stay hard!

Q.   My boyfriend can't stay hard. The first time me and my boyfriend got intimate physically he avoided intercourse and satisfied me in other ways. However, after multiply attempts to have intercourse he eventually told me that he has a problem doing it...

A.   18 April 2018: His eeectile dysfunction will not go away on its own. As he ages, it will likely get worse. You giving him time will not change these. He is way overdue for a visit to a doctor. It has been 10 years, and he needs to get over that stigma and do ... (read in full...)

I have to work nonstop to pay off my debts and I feel very restless and hopeless sometimes. How do I keep this up for another 8 months?

Q.   How do I sta sane in this financial situation.? I am living in New York City I have a roommate and I am in debt - school - medical procedure and bills all amount to 3300 a month to stay afloat - I spoke to a financial advisor and the minimum ...

A.   6 April 2018: New York is very expensive to live in. Assuming you have some professional degree/training, would you consider moving away from NYC and go elsewhere where coats of living are much less? There are lot of different programs where student loans can be ... (read in full...)

Was my husband lying about not loving the other woman?

Q.   is my husband lying to me when he says he never loved the other woman? I found messages and video with him telling her he loves her...

A.   5 April 2018: Maybe he does not love her and is telling you the truth. Maybe he does love her but is telling you a lie because that’s what you wanna hear. Third maybe is he does not even know if he loves her because cheaters, often times, have no clue what love ... (read in full...)

Is he telling the truth about the state of his marriage?

Q.   I’m seeing a married man for a number of years. I am in no rush to spending my whole life with but I do love him, he says he is in a sexless marriage, that his wife has no sex drive yet iv seen photos of them with her arm around him yet he doesn’t ...

A.   3 April 2018: I don’t mean to be rude in any way, but to me situation looks like he I could be telling you the truth about the sexless part, and that’s where you got in by providing that to him. Apart from sexlessness, he maybe totally happy with her, as well as ... (read in full...)

I suspect my daughter in law is having sex with my boyfriend

Q.   I suspect my daughter in law who is married for 11 yrs to my son on having an affair with my boyfriend of 10 years. I believe this has been going on for sometime now. I have no hard proof,just what I see with my own eyes. My gut instant is so sure, ...

A.   3 April 2018: Regrettably, gut instincts are not proof. These “instincts” sometimes may arise out of other kinds of emotions inside a person and have no basis of fact with the matter. You checked the phones and found nothing. Just because there are “cheater apps” ... (read in full...)

Have I hit my dirty 30's?

Q.   I have recently turned 35, and am wondering, if I have hit my dirty 30s late? I've been horny everyday since I turned 35. ...

A.   31 March 2018: You should enjoy your feelings. ... (read in full...)

Am I crazy for wanting to blow up my marriage and the last 20 years for my first love from 30 years ago?

Q.   I arrived at this site searching on line for "I'm still in love with my boyfriend from 30 years ago", (sigh). I read a really good post, similar to my issue, but in many other ways not similar. My college BF - we will call him "T" - definitely my ...

A.   25 March 2018: Yup you are... and on two levels. Emotionally, you are delusioning yourself with a fantasy that something that originally failed to work will somehow work now. And second, your fiduciary duty is to fix your marriage not run out to the first ... (read in full...)

Do you consider girl on girl action cheating?

Q.   I am in a relationship for almost 3 years now. My boyfriend is out of the country most of the time. We are apart for months. I love him and I have never had sex wit another man nor have I ever kissed someone else. I haven't even flirted with another ...

A.   18 March 2018: Of course this is cheating. It’s having sex with someone other than the one you supposedly pledged your love to. In your case with perhaps even worse implications because the pool of potential people you could cheat with has now expanded to include ... (read in full...)

I made a joke. I'm now wondering about my boyfriend's response.

Q.   I told my boyfriend to look for a girl to marry as a joke and he told me he would after tomorrow, since tomorrow is his birthday. He said he prefers a blonde chick, and i am a brunette. I feel upset that he said that. Would anyone else be?...

A.   13 March 2018: Suppose I was a guy absolutely not interested in getting married now but my GF throws a “joke” to look for a wife. Joke is little irksome because she knows I’m not interested and she pokes. So I brush it off, sure I’ll start tomorrow, but then I ... (read in full...)

I pushed him away, do I still have a chance?

Q.   I met a really great guy in January but pushed him away with my insecurities. We live 2 hours apart but he always called/texted/facetimed me first. Two weeks into us getting to know each other I saw that some girl commented on a Facebook picture. He ...

A.   11 March 2018: You met him in January of 2018 but accusing him of stuff that he did in October of 2017. You never knew the guy in October, so how do you expand your boundary to be the judge and jury on matters you never have been involved in. This is alarming not ... (read in full...)

I can’t shake the things he told me! Am I being unreasonable and paranoid or is he lying?

Q.   So from a very young age of around 13 I was always strongly attracted to my teacher he was a lot older than me but there was just something. Fast forward 7 years and we start speaking every day problem is he’s married. At first we talked very ...

A.   24 February 2018: I’ll assume that you are 25, and that means that you have so much of life ahead to structure and set up. When you turn 51, do you want to be like him, a miserable predicament? Of course not. So just go no contact with this guy. You don’t need him in ... (read in full...)

He said he doesn't see it working out and doesn't want to waste my time

Q.   I went on a couple dates with a really nice guy. Our chemistry was great and he's got a winning sense of humor that I just really appreciate. Everything was on track and we scheduled a third. This date wasn't awesome. I guess I was having a rough da...

A.   23 February 2018: If I was you, I’d definitively go out with him on these additional dates and use the opportunity to probe him why he thinks he’d be wasting your time. The way you stated it, it may mean that you are looking for a quick marriage with skipping the ... (read in full...)

How soon is too soon to fall in love?

Q.   I met a guy we're both in our 30s. He gave me his number once, i never called him and then a couple weeks later he approached me agian, we exchanged numbers and talked/texted all day. I think he's cool! The next day he asked me out. I said i wanted ...

A.   20 February 2018: There is such thing as love on first sight, or total clarity in guy’s mind that the woman is the one he wants to settle with. Your guy is of that age. However, love is patient and not pushy so let’s suppose he is genuine... he should know not to ... (read in full...)

Should I pursue him or let it go? Help?

Q.   So I met on a  weekend trip with friends and met a guy. Our connection was amazing. My friends and I noticed he kept staring at me and then we eventually started talking. Our connection was pretty deep. Then things turned sexual.  Im living here in ...

A.   5 February 2018: He likes you. The issue is which way. Sexually obviously, so I would minimize all that, particularly sending pictures like that. You want to pursue him, sure, to find out if there is any future with him, and if so what kind. His age suggests that he ... (read in full...)

My fiancee wants to remain friends with her ex fwb

Q.   Dear aunts and uncles. I'm bothered my fiancee is still in contact with an EXFWB on Facebook. She told me about him about a year ago, she wanted me to meet him. They were FWB for about a year and a half and ended that relationship about 3 years ag...

A.   4 February 2018: This depends on whom you ask. As for me, I’d call off the engagement, dump her and move on. She can then have her guy who was banging her and with whom she wants “to catch up”. She’ll have all the time in the world. Notwithstanding that I’d never ... (read in full...)

My job interviewed didn't offer me a job but asked me out on a date. Is this appropriate?

Q.   I am job hunting. I recently got call from one of the jobs I was interested. In the middle of the interview, the interviewer did not offer me the job due to my school schedule clashing with the days he had available. Instead he asked me out on a ...

A.   25 January 2018: I would actually run this by a civil right lawyer to see if you have an actionable situation. This guy abuses his power and I bet you are not a first woman who was his victim. ... (read in full...)

Married and seriously falling for my doctor

Q.   I am head over heels for my surgeon. I have been seeing him for about 4-5 months and my feelings keep getting stronger. There was only one time when I thought he might be interested. He told me I had a nice smile and put his hand on my thigh. Since ...

A.   23 January 2018: How is you texting him going to fix your marriage? How is you being so fixated on having an affair going to fix your marriage? How can cheating on your husband bring tranquility to your marriage? It is all about your marriage and not about that ... (read in full...)

He's abusive and I need to get out

Q.   I'm going through a really difficult period in my life and don't know what to do. How to restart and go on... I'm 41 and have been with my husband for 15 years, no kids. Good times and bad. Well now things have gotten pretty bad. The good times y...

A.   21 January 2018: I think that the ADHD is only one of the symptoms of his behavior. If he is throwing things, he likely also has Intermittent Explosive Disorder. Compulsive behavior often is another symptom with these two, however all 3 of these are often behaviors ... (read in full...)

Why did he block me? Was it because I didn’t have sex with him?

Q.   Hey guys.. I randomly met this guy last week and as soon as I saw him, I liked him. He seemed shy and I could tell he was into me but I knew he wouldn't ask me out, so I did. He took my number and he asked me to dinner on Saturday. Well he knew how ...

A.   20 January 2018: If I was you, I’d treat this as a hostage situation in which he held onto your valuable and you have to dance around until you meet him again. So I’d meet up with him in some visible place, sweet-talk him into handing the ring into your hand, and ... (read in full...)

Should I be open to casual sex to gain experience?

Q.   I am a 25 yr old male with a problem in dating/sex I cant figure out. I am finishing medical school this year. I put in a lot of work/long hours to get where I am. I go to the gym try new hobbies etc. I was shy in high school,got better in...

A.   17 January 2018: You being educated, you’d appreciate this significant statistic which says that the more partners people have been with, less happy they are with whomever they end up with. The converse is that less people you’ve been with, happier will you be with ... (read in full...)

Why did he block me? Was it because I didn’t have sex with him?

Q.   Hey guys.. I randomly met this guy last week and as soon as I saw him, I liked him. He seemed shy and I could tell he was into me but I knew he wouldn't ask me out, so I did. He took my number and he asked me to dinner on Saturday. Well he knew how ...

A.   17 January 2018: You shouldn’t spend time figuring out what happened. None of this is your fault nor your problem. For all we know, his GF was onto him that he was cheating behind her back. Or could be anything else, but whatever it is, it isn’t you. Nor should you ... (read in full...)

Is my diet likely to work?

Q.   Hey there folks. I am an unfit teen who is grossly over weight. I have heard about the apple a day thing. Does that work? I do excise Monday-Friday for about 40 mins. My mother has bad very bad eating habits, which I have grown up with and she'll ...

A.   17 January 2018: Eating apples is good but eating only apples is not good because you are depriving your body of other nutrients. So if you are eating one apple a day, you are on a crash diet, which can appear to slim you down fast but the starvation is ... (read in full...)

I'm getting married soon so why am I thinking of this other guy?

Q.   Hello, a few days ago i went to a family wedding with my fiancee. Everyone had a great time and got on well, it was brilliant! Only problem is, my cousin brought a friend with him who i now cant stop thinking about. We found we had a lot in com...

A.   16 January 2018: How long did it take you to build the relationship with your current man? Do you think you can replace him instantaneously on account that you met a guy once? Is this “met once” dude someone who can replace the man you got on the spot? Of course ... (read in full...)

How can I help him with his terrible snoring?

Q.   Dear Cupid. I need advice on how I can help my partner with his snoring! My partner and I have been together for just over three years. In the first year, year and a half my partner barely snored, we had a great bedtime routine. Fast for...

A.   14 January 2018: Has he gained weight in last year? Weight gain often causes this because air passages through the body are suddenly narrower while organs are looser and therefore spread. Loosing weight often fixes this. ... (read in full...)

Should I let her get satsfaction with another?

Q.   I’m seriously considering giving my wife permission to cheat on me; because I love her. Let me explain... I’m a 36yr old happily married man, married to a wonderful 30yr old woman with whom I have 3 children. We’ve been married for 5 years and ...

A.   12 January 2018: I think you have imaginary sexual problems. You wrongly believe that it is your size even though she told you twice that she prefers you the way you are. She told you, point blank, “it’s ok, even though it’s small, it’s perfect for me.” and then she ... (read in full...)

We met online a week ago and already love each other

Q.   I have been divorced for almost 6 months and have been dating. I met someone online and when we met in person we both felt an instant connection. He has already told me he loves me and I have told him also. It has only been a week. I have never had ...

A.   6 January 2018: You should deliberately give it some time to test your feelings over a longer period of time of courtship. Is it possible to feel that way and know that the person is the one on a first meeting? Sure it is, but that does not require immediate ... (read in full...)

My husband just can't stop grilling me about my ex and it's getting out of control now

Q.   Hi. I am 26 and just got married. I have known him from my school time. And we dated for 1 year untill we got married. He was always curious to know details about my past relationships. I had a boyfriend before him and it lasted for 3 years. My ...

A.   2 January 2018: I wouldn't break up this marriage. It's still new and this is its first test. Plus, both of you haven't don't anything to fix this situation. So far, the annoyance is escalating and both of you may ruin the marriage over nothing. Your husband ... (read in full...)

No sex in 3 years! Is he gay? Am I just a cover?

Q.   i've been seeing this guy for three years now I only see him on a Saturday till sunday, some times not even that we haven't had any sexual relationship yet sleep in the same bed , he said he don't think about sex ever , yet I found Viagra an durex ...

A.   1 January 2018: I'm assuming that your guy is in the same age bracket as you, and if so, he may have erectile dysfunction or some other hormonal imbalance such that he feels no desire for sex. I know men in this age bracket who are ED, tried Viagra but despise it ... (read in full...)

I found men's boxers next to my hot tub!

Q.   I have a hot tub in the back of the house. The yard is not fenced and there is open space behind where people often walk. Last night I found a pair of men's boxers that are not mine laying on the ground next to the tub. My wife of 19 years said ...

A.   21 December 2017: Did you question your teenage kids? What did they say?... (read in full...)

My wife wants an open relationship, I don't

Q.   My wife insists on a open relationship for her but not for me. I am very resentful about this but she says its this or nothing. I love her but I am going nuts....

A.   16 December 2017: She will get her "open" relationship one way or another. Whether you agree or not she will do it. So start thinking of what you will get because she does not care what you want. She does not care if you love her. Start loving yourself. If you don't ... (read in full...)

I need help to control his binge drinking

Q.   I need some advice. My husband has a problem with binge drinking. He can't stop at a couple and will just keep on drinking to he passes out. We don't really drink at home so it's only a problem if he goes out for drinks with friends. He normally ...

A.   9 December 2017: Your husband is a drunk. Perhaps functioning but still a drunk. I've had experience with such drunks. They would refrain from alcohol for days than weekend comes and they start downing until a blackout. Then they deny they have an alcohol problem ... (read in full...)

I feel guilty I cheated on my boyfriend with his boss

Q.   I’m 20 and my boyfriend is 22. We’ve been together for about 2 1/2 years and I’m beyond happy with him. The other night, we were fighting and I ended up leaving our apartment and just going for a drive when I stopped at the gas station and saw his ...

A.   8 December 2017: So imagine your BF talking to his boss, and the boss brims in satisfaction that he banged his GF. This being a close circuit, at some point, that creepy boss will dump subtle hints that he has had his woman and all of this will be exposed... while ... (read in full...)

My husband is having an affair with a woman half his age and lies about it!

Q.   Married 19 years my husband 54 is having an affair with a girl who is 27 he sits with her in different areas of the city and goes to her house when we go to church he knows that I know and continues to lie about everything what should I do?...

A.   8 December 2017: Examine your finances, see if you can survive on your own, if so get a lawyer and divorce him. ... (read in full...)

Mental health problem blighting my life

Q.   I wanted to come in here because I feel I need to ask for advice/feedback after some therapy had not worked. I have OCD and excessive rumination. I worry to the point where I feel I am handicapped from my thoughts. For example this incident jus...

A.   3 December 2017: Before accepting to take meds for this, I'd suggest you research this issue and see how much of the diagnosis and help you can do yourself. Mental health is a complicated issue and many times patients know better than the doctors, not just symptoms ... (read in full...)

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