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... Send *orothy Dix a private message | | | *orothy Dix's profile:I don't have any degrees other than to say that I love to help people to make the best of themselves and make their lives the best they can be. I really enjoy helping people to find answers to their problems.
I draw this information from my own personal life experience and the lessons I have learned throughout my life.
I also believe that every problem has a solution. No matter how challenging it might seem to find that solution, it's simply a case of having faith in yourself and never giving up.
I live in Sydney, Australia. I am married with no children.
I am very much a people person and like to make a difference in whatever way I can.
I'm pretty ordinary in my life as far as interests go. I like to read, knit, draw and paint whenever I get a chance. The books I read are mainly motivational books, which have helped me over the years in my own life's journey.
I am also presently studying Life Coaching (by correspondence), which I really enjoy. Although I am still studying, most of what I study I am already putting into action in my daily life. The course itself is really only the official side of becoming a Life Coach. For the most part of it, my gifts of good communication and being able to understand why things in life happen the way they do, has been gained through firsthand experience by me. |
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| Latest articles: Being Happy In a Relationship
This question has 9 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
11 August 2010: It's great being in a relationship. It can be fun and the companship is really satisfying. However, in staying happy it's important to:- (1) Both have some time to yourselves to pursue hobbies, interests. Just once a week or twice a week...
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Does withholding sex mean one is playing games?
Q. This is sequel to a previous post. How is holding out on sex with your partner playing games? How is games if your intention is not to be manipulative? Must sex be everything in a relationship? I am in a LDR which picked up very fast in the begi...
A. 12 February 2012: Hi. His family applying pressure on him to get married and settled, has probably become a part of the problem. Especially, when it didn't work out that way or in that time frame - Christmas 2011.
Time frames just can't be placed on somethin... (read in full...)
Does withholding sex mean one is playing games?
Q. This is sequel to a previous post. How is holding out on sex with your partner playing games? How is games if your intention is not to be manipulative? Must sex be everything in a relationship? I am in a LDR which picked up very fast in the begi...
A. 8 February 2012: Hi. Recently you said he called you to go out, however you told him you were busy, and you couldn't. Avoiding seeing him is only going to prolong the process. You must see each other to sort it out properly. If and when he contacts you ag... (read in full...)
Small lie by him leads to me worrying way too much...
Q. I need some advice. I have been with my LDR for almost a year and in the beginning he lied about a lot in efforts to make me like him. after a few weeks he told me the truth about himself and vowed never to lie again. well just this week I was ...
A. 2 February 2012: Hi. Perhaps it might be wiser to not ask him if something he says is the truth.
It could make him feel like he's being interrogated.
And I understand because you aren't seeing each other very often, that there is some doubt as to his faithfuln... (read in full...)
I want more physical affection from my partner who has a history of abuse.
Q. I'm M, she's F, and we're both in our early 30's. We've been together for four years, cohabiting for three. Generally I've felt like we're both fairly put together, but after a lot of introspection recently I think that's far from the truth. ...
A. 1 February 2012: Hi there. Is it possible that she is really only going to be open to you sexually, inside marriage?
Regardless of the abuse she may have suffered in her past.
You can't force the issue here, however you both need to be clear on what it is yo... (read in full...)
Not as much sex now boyfriend says he wants to keep it special?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for over two years and the sex life has always been really good and frequent, usually once or twice every day. Lately he hasn't wanted it as much though, (like only 3 or four times a week) and he told me it was ...
A. 1 February 2012: Hi there. Are you living together? Or, are you just seeing each other every day, and both live with your parents?
As you have already been together for over 2 years, you are probably now getting past the honeymoon stage or "Newness" stage, s... (read in full...)
Small lie by him leads to me worrying way too much...
Q. I need some advice. I have been with my LDR for almost a year and in the beginning he lied about a lot in efforts to make me like him. after a few weeks he told me the truth about himself and vowed never to lie again. well just this week I was ...
A. 1 February 2012: Hi there. Trust and honesty is important in ANY relationship, not just LDRs.
Perhaps he lied by omission, by not saying something he felt could be taken out of context, so he left it out purposely.
He can obviously see you are insecure in ... (read in full...)
Am I being too much?
Q. I have a crush on a very quiet person in my class at school who rarely ever talks to anyone(so it's not just me he does not respond to of course). I've been in the same classroom with him for just a few weeks so I don't really know him My friend...
A. 1 February 2012: Hi there. It sounds like he is rather shy.
And boys will be quite shy around the age he is, when he is just starting to notice girls for the first time in an almost adult way.
Around puberty, I am talking about.
Everything changes th... (read in full...)
He treats me hot and cold. Should I hang out with him?
Q. Im going to try get this out quickly. So this guy I had a major thing for kissed me, but then afterwards mentioned nothing about it. I was really upset but then found out he had tried to kiss another girl the same night he kissed me. I was ...
A. 1 February 2012: Hi there. Do you work together for the same company?
So you will see each other every day?
Or, is it that you will have contact by phone for instance, through your company having business dealings with his company?
Some reasons for his ... (read in full...)
Husband confessed to having sex with a prostitute 3 years back during an official trip. Now he has a trip to Bangkok coming up and I'm horrified at the thought of letting him go!
Q. Some 3 years back my husband had sex with a prostitute on an official trip abroad, he back and confessed too but since then I cannot trust him and I am constantly living under the fear that sooner or later he will do it again. How can I start trus...
A. 1 February 2012: Hi there. If that happened 3 years ago, and he confessed it to you back then, well that's maybe a good sign.
A lot of men probably would say nothing at all, and just promise to themselves they would never do it again. And maybe filled with gui... (read in full...)
How do I get past this guy's female friend to date him?
Q. So, I'm interested in this guy. Have been for about 6 months. We've flirted, we've hung out solo, and even come close to going out on an almost date... twice. The thing is, he always pulls back and gives me the cold shoulder when things are starting ...
A. 1 February 2012: Hi there. How did you first meet him?
To avoid seeing this female, you could not go out with that group again.
So let him come to you instead.
If he sees you are not there, and you usually are, well then he is going to have to make other pl... (read in full...)
Does withholding sex mean one is playing games?
Q. This is sequel to a previous post. How is holding out on sex with your partner playing games? How is games if your intention is not to be manipulative? Must sex be everything in a relationship? I am in a LDR which picked up very fast in the begi...
A. 1 February 2012: Hi. While ever it remains as an LDR, there is going to be not only physical distance between you, but also emotional distance.
Two people can only get so close emotionally, while you are not seeing each other - or not making love.
You can... (read in full...)
Friends can't kiss... Right?
Q. Dear Cupid, Well, heres another update, a mind boggling one at that rate. I visited B around his again, we had fun and a few laughs and ended up on his sofa watching a film, we were cuddling my head resting on his chest. I felt him gently push me t...
A. 30 January 2012: Hi there. You are friends, obviously.
You both need to be clear on where you stand with each other, since this sexual encounter.
There's nothing for it but it ask him straight out, does he want more than friendship.
He's the only person ... (read in full...)
Does withholding sex mean one is playing games?
Q. This is sequel to a previous post. How is holding out on sex with your partner playing games? How is games if your intention is not to be manipulative? Must sex be everything in a relationship? I am in a LDR which picked up very fast in the begi...
A. 28 January 2012: Hi there. If he sees it as no sex means playing games, he is probably wondering why there was sex before and not now.
He probably can't see the logic to it at all.
He might also see it as a rejection of sorts.
If you haven't done so yet,... (read in full...)
Is my penpal flirting with me or is it just my imagination?
Q. I have a penpal and yesterday we were talking (we talk 6 hours everyday) and i am starting to fall in love with him but i am not so sure if he feels the same way about me (we will see each other in a couple of weeks in NYC). Yesterday, he ...
A. 22 January 2012: Hi there. It probably doesn't mean too much.
What it probably does mean, is that he is trying to not get too involved, in case it doesn't work out. So he doesn't get hurt.
It seems like he is keeping it light and fun.
So just take it that ... (read in full...)
Spots on my vagina
Q. Since from as a long as I can remember I've always had spots on my vagina, at first I thought it was simply just a shaving rash, but they don't seem to disapear, and before people say anything, I can say for a fact its not a STI or anything of that ...
A. 22 January 2012: Hi there. When you say around your vagina, are you referring to the outer lips - when the public hair grows?
Or, are you referring to the soft deep pink tissue of the inner lips? The same colour as the lips of your mouth.
Whatever it i... (read in full...)
How can we overcome conflicting schedules?
Q. I do not want us to fade. Basically, me and my gf, who lives 1hr 30mins away from me have been dating for over a year, we chat all the time, calls last 2hrs a night. We meet every fortnight and dedicate/spend the whole day with each other 10hrs...
A. 17 January 2012: Hi there. It sounds like meeting halfway is about the only choice you both have.
Even though it doesn't sound like it could work when you just look at whole days, it might be easier to look at the actual hours you both have free each day.
... (read in full...)
Too many red flags here? Or should I have more patience?
Q. Ok, me and my boyfriend have been together for 6 months now. It's still early days I know, but it's also a long enough period to see how the persons personality is etc. My boyfriend had a troubled childhood, his mum ran away aged 5 and his dad beat ...
A. 17 January 2012: Hi. It's a start that he recognises he has a problem, so that's positive.
It now comes down to what he is going to do to resolve it, once and for all.
A good place to start is for you and him to sit down together and talk about how you ca... (read in full...)
How should I take this? Is this a date? Or am I just a friend?
Q. I just "hung out" with a friend tonight who I really like and she knows I like her (we dated for a bit last year) we've been hanging out more recently cause we both joined this art group. She came down tonight ( which I found out was like a 45 ...
A. 14 January 2012: Hi there. You dated for a bit last year, you said.
Why didn't that continue?
Perhaps you didn't make your intentions clear to her, so she thought nothing more of it.
Even though you took her out for a short time, she might have seen it a... (read in full...)
All we've done is argue since we've been together but he is my heart!
Q. okay so me and my boyfriend has been together for 5 months almost 6 months, and all we do is argue slmost everyday, i love him 2 death and i kno he loves me too. i feel like i am going 2 lose him sooner then later. but i dont want to lose him ...
A. 14 January 2012: Hi there. When he was upset at you turning up at his house unannounced, he might have seen that as controlling.
Most men like to be in control of what happens in the relationship. By that I mean, they like to set the pace of it, and how slow or ... (read in full...)
Too many red flags here? Or should I have more patience?
Q. Ok, me and my boyfriend have been together for 6 months now. It's still early days I know, but it's also a long enough period to see how the persons personality is etc. My boyfriend had a troubled childhood, his mum ran away aged 5 and his dad beat ...
A. 13 January 2012: Hi. It sounds like he is in a bit of denial.
Maybe he just doesn't want to know he has a problem, or rather, won't ACCEPT he has a problem, so denies that a problem exists.
This is probably how he copes.
The trouble with that is even though... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is coming to visit me at uni, but I haven't told my friends here I'm gay!
Q. Hey, Well basically my girlfriend is coming up to see me next week as I'm in uni but my friends don't know I'm gay and I'm scared this will break her heart if I don't tell them who she really is but I'm also really scared to tell my friends I'm g...
A. 11 January 2012: Hi there. Perhaps you could gauge their reaction by somehow finding out in conversation about how they feel about homosexuals.
How you would do this, without drawing suspicion from them, is up to you.
And it really depends on how close to the... (read in full...)
I pushed my fiance away and he says he's numb now. I want him back!
Q. Hi there, I have a got a question and would really love your feedback or any kind of advice if possible. I have been in relationship on distance for about 3 years, of course it's been hard we couldn't see each other often, but at least we would s...
A. 11 January 2012: Hi. Thanks - No worries. I'll answer it there.... (read in full...)
I'm too controlling over him and don't know how to stop!
Q. ive been with my bf for about three years now we just recently had a babygirl who now is 5months and thing are good between us we used to fight alot over things that happend in the past thing are good now but ive notice that i feel realy attached to ...
A. 11 January 2012: Hi. Perhaps what you mean by wanting to feel less attracted to him, is that you don't want to NEED him so much.
Some of what you are feeling comes from insecurity, and the fear you might lose him, because everything is going so well.
Perhaps... (read in full...)
Too many red flags here? Or should I have more patience?
Q. Ok, me and my boyfriend have been together for 6 months now. It's still early days I know, but it's also a long enough period to see how the persons personality is etc. My boyfriend had a troubled childhood, his mum ran away aged 5 and his dad beat ...
A. 10 January 2012: Hi there. It sounds like his childhood life still influences his life as an adult.
He has learnt to not trust people, or at least doesn't know when he CAN trust people.
This causes all sorts of problems, no doubt.
He has a fear of inti... (read in full...)
I'm too controlling over him and don't know how to stop!
Q. ive been with my bf for about three years now we just recently had a babygirl who now is 5months and thing are good between us we used to fight alot over things that happend in the past thing are good now but ive notice that i feel realy attached to ...
A. 10 January 2012: Hi there. Now that you have a baby, your life has probably changed substantially.
However, your boyfriend's life hasn't changed much at all.
He still has his freedom.
You might be feeling a touch resentful towards the freedom he still has... (read in full...)
I pushed my fiance away and he says he's numb now. I want him back!
Q. Hi there, I have a got a question and would really love your feedback or any kind of advice if possible. I have been in relationship on distance for about 3 years, of course it's been hard we couldn't see each other often, but at least we would s...
A. 9 January 2012: Hi. He seems to be doubtful and slightly unsure, and you also have some doubt.
It probably would be wise to hold off on any wedding plans for a while, until you can work out some way of seeing each other again.
Until you do see each other, ... (read in full...)
I pushed my fiance away and he says he's numb now. I want him back!
Q. Hi there, I have a got a question and would really love your feedback or any kind of advice if possible. I have been in relationship on distance for about 3 years, of course it's been hard we couldn't see each other often, but at least we would s...
A. 4 January 2012: Hi there. The main problem here seems to be the fact you are in a long distance relationship.
In fact, it's probably the ONLY problem.
And this means that you are not seeing each other like most other couples, who live in the same town.
It... (read in full...)
What behaviour suggests that a guy feels rejected by a girl??
Q. I know this might be an obvious question. However, I'm still quite unsure myself. I think I 'rejected' a guy but I'm not too sure..if that makes sense? He always used to flirt with me but then always act a bit funny with me. As in he'd awkward but ...
A. 4 January 2012: Hi there. What needs to happen here is for you to both be on the same page as each other.
Maybe he would like to date you - but he is shy - so flirting is how he gauges whether you are interested or not - by your reaction.
And because you don'... (read in full...)
Why does he seem so up for being together but still there's something putting him off?
Q. hey aunts and uncles, for my question the boy is called A and his girlfriend is called B just so things don't get confusing. 3years ago i had an amazing relationship with A for 13months and then i started to have feelings for someone else s...
A. 4 January 2012: Hi there. What you said here is pretty much on the money.
It seems fairly clear that he probably is having some doubts about you and thinking back to what happened before.
He doesn't want to give his heart to you once again, only to find tha... (read in full...)
I need to get rid of her boyfriend!
Q. I know its selfish, and ignorant... I have no troubles with women, and i have ran in to the problem. Well, she is cute, funny, and has what this guy wants. the problem? Her boyfriend... She has told someone she likes me, and she almost came to a ...
A. 3 January 2012: Hi there. Unfortunately, no matter how much you like this girl, the decision to end that relationship is up to her, and no-one else.
Even though she is still with him, and she likes you, she still stays with him, doesn't she?
So why does s... (read in full...)
He can't have loved me like I thought! Is he a loser?
Q. Me an my x broke up 3 months ago. I have never heard off him since. I did cheat on him, but i was drunk and it meant nothing. He changed his number. He cannot love me like i thought because he would have wanted to sort our problems out. Is it time ...
A. 27 December 2011: Hi there. I guess it really depends on what you broke up over, doesn't it?
Was it something big or something really trivial?
Or, was it because you cheated on him and he felt he could never trust you again?
I'm assuming he knew that yo... (read in full...)
I am in a complicated situation with this guy, is he flirty or is he just hurt?
Q. I am in an extremely complicated and overly dramatized situation. I will try my best to sum it up and hit the main points. I met this guy, he seemed nice and we hit it off. He was obviously into me. He told me he would go out of his way to do ce...
A. 27 December 2011: Hi there. It seems like he is trying to get a reaction out of you, to gauge how you feel about him.
Making you jealous seems to be how he's doing it.
He's doing that rather than ask you straight out. It's a round about way, I guess that some ... (read in full...)
I'm terrified that he's lost interest in me again. Is that possible? Or am I just being paranoid?
Q. Hello everyone. So I need some help. There's this boy I like... We're pretty good friends. But... He's sending me some serious mixed signals. Here's how it all started: (sorry if it's lengthy, but it all has a point.) Well, he and I met at the end...
A. 27 December 2011: Hi there. Both of you do need some time on your own where you are aren't texting or seeing each other.
Perhaps a day or two or even three days, of no contact with each other. Using that time to have a life of your own.
"Life of your own" mea... (read in full...)
How do I explain my love for my new Bf to my family? I am afraid they will not accept him due to his military background
Q. Hi Everyone, Things in my life were difficult for a few years. Over the last year, life took a turn for the better and I'm so much happier now. I have got a better job, moved into a home of my own with my kids and built up a circle of friend...
A. 27 December 2011: Hi there. Is your boyfriend in the regular army?
And if so, I'm guessing that he does tours of duty in other countries where they are fighting all the time - like Afghanistan, Iraq etc.
This is his business and no-one else's. It's his life, a... (read in full...)
Its really hard for me to tell if a man is interested in being serious
Q. Hello dearcupid, I have had a bit of dating experience, but only one serious relationship. It's really hard for me to tell if a man is interested in being serious! I was hoping you could tell me some signs that he is seriously interested, and ...
A. 27 December 2011: Hi there. Guys usually won't be thinking about getting serious and towards the future for several months - until they can see you really get along well with each other.
It also depends on the guy himself, and what he wants from his life.
... (read in full...)
I think I destroyed my relationship
Q. i have just done the hardest thing i have ever had to do in my life. I think I destroyed my relationship. I have been feeling distant for months, and have been trying so hard to make this work. But I know he loves me, and I know I love him. ...
A. 27 December 2011: Hi there. Maybe what has happened is that you tried to please him too much and in doing so, you forgot about making time for your own needs.
It happens.
Women often try so hard to make it work in a relationship, that they partly or almost... (read in full...)
Why do I feel guilty - my boyfriend cheated on me
Q. I was with my boyfriend for three years. I didn't think we had any problems,only trying life circumstances, but since he ended the relationship by cheating on me, I've found out he was unhappy. The thing that shocks me about the break up is that...
A. 26 December 2011: Hi there. Perhaps you didn't sit down with each other to talk about any issues, often enough.
Most differences can be sorted out through good communication, so that at least anything bothering either of you can be aired and discussed, and then... (read in full...)
Sex with a new person felt like the first time? WHY?
Q. i lost my virginity in june and was sleeping with the same person until october; so i am used to sex by now. so why when i slept with someone else a few days ago did it still not go smoothly? The other person has also lost their virignity so why d...
A. 23 December 2011: Hi. Perhaps you were not moving in sync with each other.
You could have been moving away from him - when he was moving towards you.
With a new partner, it is a case of getting used to each other and establishing a regular rythm, once he w... (read in full...)
I think I have a cheating boyfriend!
Q. i'll try to keep this short. i think my bf of 3 yrs is starting to cheat on me...our relation is a long-distance one. we talk to each other abour 2 hrs over the phone.recelty he is under a lot of work,so he comes home tired. 3 yrs ago, a girl was ...
A. 23 December 2011: Hi. Do you mean that your mother doesn't approve of the relationship, because you and him are not married?
There's probably not a lot you can do about that, unless you moved out of home.
Your mother might be having doubts about his intent... (read in full...)
Sex with a new person felt like the first time? WHY?
Q. i lost my virginity in june and was sleeping with the same person until october; so i am used to sex by now. so why when i slept with someone else a few days ago did it still not go smoothly? The other person has also lost their virignity so why d...
A. 18 December 2011: Hi there. Do you mean "like the first time" that it caused you some pain?
Was there blood from the breaking hymen?
So what I am really asking here is, in what way was it like the first time for you?
Or, are you saying that it was not v... (read in full...)
Have I ruined my chances with my Ex Boyfriend?
Q. Hey all, Recently I've been talking to an ex from a long time ago and he admitted to me after a year of being apart that he still had feelings for me. I'll admit that I've always had feelings for him and have wanted to get back together with hi...
A. 18 December 2011: Hi there. Is the real issue that you told him you had given up, and then someone said they saw you smoking?
Even if you were smoking, what was the big deal?
Is your smoking the real issue between you and your mother?
There seems to be a f... (read in full...)
My husband tried cheating and there are still issues of trust
Q. Married n confused.Husband has tried cheating online as well as done other things that are wrong.Says he's no longer talking to or doing anything with other females but he wont be open with me on anything.Made clear to me he's not doing anything so ...
A. 18 December 2011: Hi there. If you are wondering if he really is cheating or not, you only have to look at his general behaviour.
If he is where he says he's going to be and if he is with who he says he's with, well then he is being honest with you in that way... (read in full...)
What are opinions about male menopause?
Q. I was wondering about your opinion, about male menopause . Some doctors believe it, when man has problems with libido,or getting an erection, it is explained, with this new term. But I have an extreme case of this, if it is true, and my ...
A. 18 December 2011: Hi there. Like others have also said here, some medications can cause problems with attaining an erection.
And certainly stress alone, would take away the desire to have sex at all!
As you seem to realize yourself, it most likely is partly... (read in full...)
I think I have a cheating boyfriend!
Q. i'll try to keep this short. i think my bf of 3 yrs is starting to cheat on me...our relation is a long-distance one. we talk to each other abour 2 hrs over the phone.recelty he is under a lot of work,so he comes home tired. 3 yrs ago, a girl was ...
A. 17 December 2011: Hi. I realize you talk to him on a fairly regular basis, but do you ever actually see each other?
And if you do, how often is it that you see you each other?... (read in full...)
I think I have a cheating boyfriend!
Q. i'll try to keep this short. i think my bf of 3 yrs is starting to cheat on me...our relation is a long-distance one. we talk to each other abour 2 hrs over the phone.recelty he is under a lot of work,so he comes home tired. 3 yrs ago, a girl was ...
A. 16 December 2011: Hi there. You said this is a long distance relationship.
How far are you from each other? Is it several hours drive or 1 hour on a jetplane?
So what I'm really asking, is do you see each other at all?
Talking on an internet chat line or on... (read in full...)
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