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| | *erberus_Raphael's profile:I see love everywhere and I see it as a chance for peace. With love, there is a happiness because real, strong love, is a truly benevolent emotion. The archangel Raphael is god's healing. Through God, do I find inspiration to at least try my best to guide others to the peace they seek. I turned to god when I had no where else to go and I found something I could trust in and believe in when I felt cold hearted and angry, the very same way people feel when they trust in the ones they truly love.
If anyone is wondering, the very symbolic nature of Cerberus is important to me. It signifies a time in my life was my liberator and destroyer, I was pushed to the brink of sanity and pulled back, all because of a complicated form of love. But it made me stronger and wiser and now I seek to spare the broken the same physical and emotional pain I felt once before. I was an awful, intolerable, intolerant, heartless and destructive young man before I found a form of peace. As much as I want to help those in need, as much as I like to think that what I say may bring a smile or hope to one's life, I need to remember that what I do here is for my own sense of redemption.
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| Latest articles: International Day of Tolerance
This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
16 November 2010: I am sure there are some who know what day the 16th of November is, and I am also sure that there are some who don't. The 16th of November was declared the 'International Day of Tolerance' and its purpose is to spread peace amongst all races and ...
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I love her and I'm ready for sex. Should I go ahead with it?
Q. Ok....Heres the situation me and this girl are deeply in love. We are not 18 we are both within a year of each other age wise. This past weekend we where close to having intercourse when I stopped us. The only reason I stopped us is I didn't want ...
A. 12 November 2010: No matter what we say, you are going to try and excuse yourself in order to morally excuse yourself. The law has worked countless times. What about the criminals thrown in jail for crimes they DID commit. Do not overlook that. What about the laws ... (read in full...)
I love her and I'm ready for sex. Should I go ahead with it?
Q. Ok....Heres the situation me and this girl are deeply in love. We are not 18 we are both within a year of each other age wise. This past weekend we where close to having intercourse when I stopped us. The only reason I stopped us is I didn't want ...
A. 11 November 2010: Emotions is exactly what that law is based on! They know you will have the urge to have sex and they know that you will obviously fall into what you believe to be love. That is why they set that law, to ensure that you are taken care of and you grow ... (read in full...)
Am I overreacting if I don't like it when my boyfriend looks up naked women online?
Q. It was in July this year that I first found out that my boyfriend has been watching pictures of naked women on the internet. I was looking for a web page I couldn't find but had visited before so I tried to look for it in his browsing history. When ...
A. 8 November 2010: You are not the first to be emotionally wounded by something like this. Most wives tell their husbands about what they have found and most husbands tell their wives that they are overreacting. They argue that it is alright because everybody does it. ... (read in full...)
I'm falling in love with her and falling out of love with myself.
Q. I'm a shorter guy, 5'6 and 1/2. I've always been subconsciously self-conscious about my height but it's never really bothere me too much as it's taught me to grow in other areas such as a good sense of humor, empathy, my creative side, and ...
A. 8 November 2010: Do not let this such a lovely relationship fall apart because of a single inch. If you need to, I suggest you tell her so she can assure you that she does not care about your height at all. Perhaps then you will have a boost in self-confidence ... (read in full...)
I don't know if she really is under stress or am I just tripping?
Q. So here's the setup. I've been with the girl for about a month and a half. We are both 19 and in the same college, and live quite close. She is my first girlfriend, but she has had several boyfriends before me. In the beginning we were quite close...
A. 8 November 2010: I am afraid that righ now there really is nothing much you can do. If you ask her it may be received as pestering. If you leave it, I suppose you can only take her word for it. How much do you trust this girl? Perhaps she really is stressed and ... (read in full...)
How do I become a good girlfriend?
Q. okay guys , please answer . I am wondering what guys like in girls . or how to be a good girlfriend ? what do you guys think is a good kisser ? please help !!!! [guys and girls answerthis one ) me and my boyfriend are gonna have our first dance ...
A. 8 November 2010: To the first question, I can only say that it depends on the guy. Some appreciate a thoughtful and outgoing type of girlfriend, some demand what they think is obediance if they are the controlling type. If your boyfriend is decent, he will ... (read in full...)
I can't imagine life without him ...
Q. So, I really need your help. This guy and I both liked each other. We hungout and he took me home from school for about 3-4 weeks. We loved each other but werent "in love". A week ago he stopped texting me as much as he used to so I texted him ...
A. 8 November 2010: Do not be so quick to lose hope. I know it hurts, your heart aches and sometimes crying is a necessity but do not lose hope. It may feel as though this should be the end because you just cannot go on but do not lose faith. Do not seek death.
He si... (read in full...)
Is our relationship failing? Is there a way I can get the spark back?
Q. How can I get the spark back? Me and my boyfriend are in holiday in Barcelona and he just now said to me that through out this whole trip he hasn’t been happy with me and that he thinks that whatever he does, I will never be satisfied. That...
A. 8 November 2010: From what I have read, it seems as though he is failing as a boyfriend. Why could he not have simply set a nice and simple dinner, for example he could have had his Paella on the beach with you. It is not impossible, the problem is, he did not wish ... (read in full...)
I don't think I'm ready for sex!!
Q. I'm only 14, my boyfriends 15 and has had many different girlfriends. He's not a virgin anymore. I love him, I think... :S But we've actually negotiated a day to have sex (New years eve, 2011) and I said I would because I don't want to loose him. ...
A. 8 November 2010: Tell him that you are not ready. You should not lose your virginity simply because you do not wish to loose him, that would mean your entire relationship revolves around sex and that will not end well. If you mean anything to him, he will be with ... (read in full...)
I love her and I'm ready for sex. Should I go ahead with it?
Q. Ok....Heres the situation me and this girl are deeply in love. We are not 18 we are both within a year of each other age wise. This past weekend we where close to having intercourse when I stopped us. The only reason I stopped us is I didn't want ...
A. 8 November 2010: You have tried to prevent hearing what you already know. No matter how much you dislike that answer, the fact of the matter is that you ARE too young. It may feel as though you are emotionally ready but you never know. Which is why you should wait ... (read in full...)
Any suggestions, as I watch her try to decide what to do with her marriage?
Q. I am a male, age 56 and recently left a 30 year marriage after falling in love with another woman...Gosh, heard this before, I'm sure. Anyway, to complicate things, she is in an unhappy 30 year marriage herself and is in love with me as well. We ...
A. 8 November 2010: I see the way you describe this problem and I take issue with the fact that you seem to be comparing yourself to her current husband as if you wish for everyone to think that she would be much better off with you. That may very well be true but you ... (read in full...)
My wife thinks I won't protect her and her child
Q. Myself and wife and her 13 year old daughter from a previous marriage were watching a high school football game last night sounds good right? Well my step daughter who was getting bored with the game and wanted to walk around so my wife said ok to ...
A. 7 November 2010: There really is no right or wrong here and you are much too presumptuous in this. Your wife is not wrong but neither are you. Your wife is the mother of a 13 year old girl and obviously she is going to defend her child no matter what. You as her ... (read in full...)
How do I make him feel special?
Q. I can't describe how I feel for him . he makes me happy , I get weak-kneed whenever he's around , and I just want to stay with him forever . I want to give him a blowjob or handjob , butt I know he hasn't gone through puberty yet and I'm just so ...
A. 7 November 2010: Sex should not even be on your list yet. There are ways to make someone feel special without having to sexually arouse them. Get him a gift that has some meaning, something reminiscent of your relationship with him. You could be each other's best ... (read in full...)
I don't know what I am!
Q. Okay, I am 1OO% virgin. Just fyi... Now, my issue is that I'm not sure if I am 1OO% heterosexual. It's not even an issue really because I'd be totally fine with me someday hooking up with a girl. I don't see myself marrying one. I can see myself ...
A. 7 November 2010: You could possibly be a lesbian or a bisexual but leaning more towards the attraction to women. It is nothing to be ashamed of so, feel free to be open about it with around people when you are ready.
I know some people who are similar to you, the... (read in full...)
Ex sent me an email, what am I supposed to make of it?
Q. heyy ! My relationship with my boyfriend of 2 years ended about a month ago. It really meant alot to me. But we thought that was the best for us. We haven't spoken to each toher since then but today he sent me this mail. I don't know what to reply ...
A. 7 November 2010: He obviously misses you and perhaps, even though you both thought breaking up was for the best, he regrets it and he may seek to undo what has been done.
Either that or he seeks friendship, and to that I agree. Why not maintain a friendsh... (read in full...)
I've lost my girlfriend's trust because of lies
Q. i've lost my gf's trust because of lies i have said but some of the things i said to her were the truth and she believed to lie because of an coincidental thing said what happened between me and her and somehow her ex said that something with some ...
A. 7 November 2010: Tell her the truth. NEVER lie. Lies will only make things worse. Right now, your relationship is ALREADY at risk because of this man.
I think you both need to sit down and talk about the issues you have between you. She needs to stop relying ... (read in full...)
I want to hurt women the way my ex hurt me!
Q. I'm not proud of what I'm about to say because I know it is wrong and can never be justified so that's why I'm wanting your reinforcemt.I was played like a fiddle by my girlfriend and when all my strings popped she tossed me in the ally with the ...
A. 7 November 2010: And what will that achieve? You are about to emotionally tarnish the vulnerable women who would love you? How can a thought such as that even cross your mind? What if you find a woman who loves you more than your ex ever could? Would you so ... (read in full...)
My work took my wife away! How do I get her back?
Q. I am lost for what to do to get my wife back. We have been separated for over two weeks now and we still live together. I have been depressed for a long time and I believe this has gradually deteriorated things between us. I had been looking for a ...
A. 7 November 2010: If she wants to start dating, why not suggest that she go on one more date with you? You do still live together, make it a priority to give her a good time and let her see how you two fell in love in the first place. Try to show her that you do ... (read in full...)
How do you stop having feelings for someone?
Q. I met a guy on holiday 4 years ago and we got on really well and spent the whole holiday together. Then when we came back to the uk he came up to see me and i went down to see him, but it just fizzled out and we lost contact. I actually really ...
A. 6 November 2010: If ever you find yourself flooded with emotions or thoughts of him, distract yourself and push them aside. In time, you will cease to think of him at all, assuming you have already removed all things you have of him, meaning pictures or notes or ... (read in full...)
I don't know if hes the right one for me. He never says he loves me
Q. Hi there.. I am a 19 yr. Old girl. I am in a relationship with my bf from last 2 years and i feel he doesnt care about me at all. I just want to seek advice from everyone regarding this. Whenever i go out with my guy friends or flirts with t...
A. 6 November 2010: For some people, words can be spewed as easily and effortlessly as spit. There lies no true meaning in his words. Right now, whatever he says to you is as hollow and heartless. What you want in a boyfriend cannot be found in this man and so, I ... (read in full...)
A previous porn addict balancing masturbation/porn in new relationship
Q. I have in my past been strongly addicted, and satisfied somewhat, with porn browsing, gathering, viewing and masturbation. I enjoyed every aspect of it, and though I've struggled with it's influence on my relationships and tried countless times to ...
A. 6 November 2010: At last! A fresh perspective! I salute you for your success with dealing so well with your past addiction. Yes it is extrememly difficult at times but understand that masturbation does not go hand in hand with pornography, you can fantasize about ... (read in full...)
I'm starting to see him as how he is, not a prince charming
Q. Hi, I have been in a strong loving relationship with my boyfriend for almost four years, never had any major problems that any normal relationship wouldn't go through. I became pregnant five months ago and it seems like our relationship just ...
A. 6 November 2010: It does sound like he is trying. Perhaps you can try and call him and ask how things are and if everything is alright, perhaps that will give him the proper hints to show him that he needs to start doing the same for you.
Why did he move in the f... (read in full...)
Whats up with this mysterious guy?
Q. It is Friday night and I am sitting home with tears. I had two offers for dates tonight, (both with advanced degrees) I am in love with someone who I can not have. Well, I should say he is shy. His body language says one thing and he does something ...
A. 6 November 2010: Why do you not just ask him to go to dinner with you and narrow his options so he cannot get away with remaining completely silent. It is either a yes or a no.
This is a little far fetched but I do suspect it may be a limerence of sorts that he ... (read in full...)
I'm caught up in 3 different situations!
Q. I'm a 15 year old female and I'm also bi. I'm so confused right now. It's a basic question: What do you do when you're still in love with your first love,(of course) really really like another girl, and dating a guy that you sort of like. Is this ...
A. 6 November 2010: You should not be dating unless you are absolutely sure otherwise, it would be unfair to everyone, including yourself.
Talk to both of them, seperately and see which one you really feel something for, in which case I advise you to just go for it. ... (read in full...)
Marriage - why should any man bother?
Q. Women… why should any guy propose marriage? Full disclosure: I have never been married, but several family members and friends have been hurt by divorce, and I know of only a handful of happy marriages over one year old. My feelings for the...
A. 6 November 2010: Yes, people do seem to easily delve into things that do no concern them. Lawyers, government officials, people in higher power seem to bind themselves to things that once did not concern them but, that has never stopped anyone before. I think fear ... (read in full...)
It hurts when he says he just wants to be with his ex
Q. Dear Cupid, I am a widow and have started a new relationship with this gentalmen that persued me for about a month before I finally gave in. He acts like he really really cares about me. He is generous ,kind, attentive, calls almost everynig...
A. 6 November 2010: Is it truly worth it all? You have already felt pain once, spare your dear heart the suffering that may follow.
This man is honest at least so he obviously feels something towards you and it may or may not be strong enough to build this relation... (read in full...)
How can my friend talk to her boyfriend about this?
Q. So my friend asked me to ask you all for advice. Her boyfriend and her have been dating for 8 months. She feels recently that he isn't as into the relationship then he used to be. She has tried talking to him about it but he says "I don't want to...
A. 6 November 2010: The suggestion of talking to her boyfriend may not have worked but it was certainly not bad advice to give. It revealed a lot about their relationship. I think he is telling the truth when he says he wishes to stay with her but, I suspect that it is ... (read in full...)
Should my Brother-in-law have helped me dress?
Q. I am 24, and my sister's husband took me to a hospital for a minor procedure that involved anesthesia. When I was done, he came in to see me. The nurse came in and said I could go, but needed to get dressed. She assumed he was my husband, and ...
A. 6 November 2010: There is no shame in this. He showed as much respect as he possibly could in this situation and that shows that he was merely a caring family member. He saw you naked? Is that truly such an issue? I doubt that was the first time he had ever seen a ... (read in full...)
I think I might have caused my g/f to go to the hospital because I accused her of cheating
Q. Dear cupid I’m with my gf 1year and 4 months. We love each over and leaved this summer together. Now we have a long distance relationship, but yesterday I found out this. She has another Skype account, and I entered it via her e-mail, so then a long ...
A. 6 November 2010: Simple. Look back on your relationship with her, aside from this recent anomaly, what has ever happened to cause you to lose your trust in her? What has she ever done to cause you to suspect disloyalty?
Make a list. Things she has done that pro... (read in full...)
I think I might have caused my g/f to go to the hospital because I accused her of cheating
Q. Dear cupid I’m with my gf 1year and 4 months. We love each over and leaved this summer together. Now we have a long distance relationship, but yesterday I found out this. She has another Skype account, and I entered it via her e-mail, so then a long ...
A. 5 November 2010: I can imagine it. But in this case, I strongly advise you to reconsider what you think of this whole occurrence. You seem to be all to willing to believe that your girlfriend is being unfaithful to you in some way. I know it is difficult but your ... (read in full...)
I don't want to look at her in just a sexual way
Q. I really love my friend in the college and I had dreams about her.. she has an angel face I hope to marry her and she actually knows about my feelings and seems to be happy about that but my problem is that she has a big sexy boobs... they make me ...
A. 5 November 2010: I do not think you a bad person because you realize that these sexual feelings you have are not something to confuse love with and that is good.
Control your urges, control your lustful thoughts. If you have a lustful thought, look into her eyes... (read in full...)
I think I might have caused my g/f to go to the hospital because I accused her of cheating
Q. Dear cupid I’m with my gf 1year and 4 months. We love each over and leaved this summer together. Now we have a long distance relationship, but yesterday I found out this. She has another Skype account, and I entered it via her e-mail, so then a long ...
A. 5 November 2010: You must realize that if this was the cause of her hospitalization, she must love you a lot. I cannot even begin to describe how amazed I am at how deeply she must love you.
Do you not trust her by now? People hack into other people's facebook... (read in full...)
Is "true love" just a myth?
Q. Dear Cupid Is true love exist? Is it really stupid to believe that one day we'll find our true love or soul mate? What if we find soul mate but the other person (soul mate) doesnt acknowledge it? Thanks in advance for your answers...
A. 5 November 2010: If you meet someone and have a relationship with them, if you feel something strong between you, I think that is love. Love is a strength of heart. If someone does not acknowledge love, they are probably not your 'soul mate'. But make no mistake, ... (read in full...)
I am not sure if I love him anymore but I honestly don't want us to break up
Q. i am 19 years old and i have been in a relationship with my bf over 2 years now. out of that two years we have been in a long distance relationship for 3 months and still going. Since recently i have been thinking a lot if i truely love my bf and ...
A. 5 November 2010: You do not want to let him go and he does not wish to let you go either. It is perfectly all right for you to stay with him and keep him with you until you know for sure that you do not love him because, from what you have written, even though you ... (read in full...)
I love a woman 11 years older than me
Q. Hello. I am 18 years old. For several months, I had a Japanese woman stay at my house when she visited the united states. She is 11 years older than I am. She is very sweet and cute. We enjoy long talks and find that we have many things in ...
A. 5 November 2010: In this instance, age is but a mere number and is of little consequence when measured against the strength of your every heartbeat devoted to your thoughts of her. I say pursue her and tell her how you feel about her. I have larger age gaps, ones ... (read in full...)
Is the only option I have to leave this relationship? I just cant cope with his child, his ex and the disappointment that I wont be the first to give him a family...
Q. heya. i am very distraught an confused. i have been with my boyfriend for 14 months. he is the type of boy who had slept around.....A LOT! with me he changed an is totally devoted to me, an has never cheated. but about 7 an a half months ago. he ...
A. 5 November 2010: I wish that every man would stop making such careless mistakes. I wish women like you would not have to go through things like this. Sometimes I am ashamed to be a man because I will always be the one my other male friends talk to about how they are ... (read in full...)
How do we make this work?
Q. I am asking for help on how to make my relationship work. I have a girlfriend for more than 6 years already and we had a son at an early age. So after graduating, we decided to prioritize our own careers and were very distant from each other. I am a ...
A. 5 November 2010: As much as you love her and your son, you have to let her go. She is staying with you but, not out of the same love you feel for her. She needs to decide whether or not she wants to be with you or if she wishes to be with someone else but she cannot ... (read in full...)
I am married and very unhappy,I constantly think of leaving my husband but never have the courage to so
Q. I am married and very unhappy,I constantly think of leaving my husband but never has the courage to so.We are 10years together and no kids. About six weeks ago I met a man online,he says he is divorce but we have not met yet in person. After few e ...
A. 5 November 2010: Before you meet him, I suggest you get a divorce. Gather your courage and get a divorce. I know it has been a long time and you might even fear the future without anyone beside you but you must rid yourself of these fears and get a divorce so that ... (read in full...)
He kissed me at work!
Q. I was having a bad day, new job new city, overworked/stressed, very sad missing my sister, my little brother, etc., When all of a sudden my guy friend/co-worker (whom until this moment seemed oblivious to my emotional hang-ups) pulled me into a ...
A. 5 November 2010: It depends on how you feel about it? Do you think it was a big deal? If it was then I think it best you talk to him about it because, you sound as though you may be interested romantically in him.
If he was seeing someone, would he have kissed y... (read in full...)
I care about him so much but I don't understand why he is treating me like this.
Q. My boyfriend and I fighter a lot but in the end it seems we always make up. About a month ago he "kind of" cheated on me. Kind of like cyber cheating with like at least 10 different girls. He came clean and i forgave him. He said he cares about ...
A. 5 November 2010: You leave him. You do not have to understand why he is treating you like when you have done nothing wrong. The fact is that he no longer seems to care about you as his girlfriend and he does not appreciate how lucky he is to have one as forgiving as ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend's difficult Teenage Daughter
Q. I have a similar situation with my Boyfriends 16 year old daughter! I live with my boyfriend and his daughter....She feels free to come in our bedroom and take something of mine.....Especially if her father purchased it for me. Her comment to...
A. 5 November 2010: Perhaps the distance is not the solution but the cause of the problems! She sounds as though she wants to make you leave. Perhaps if you spend some time with her and get to know her she will stop behaving this way, after all, children may instantly ... (read in full...)
Why did my best female friend stop talking to me?
Q. To start off I became really close with a female friend of mine and yes I really liked her but she had a boyfriends so I never told her how I felt because I didn't want to mess her relationship up with him even though he was horrible to her. She ...
A. 5 November 2010: Have you contacted her family? I do not know what may have transpired after that call but, from what I have read it sounds as though you were left clueless and if I were you I would have been worried because she does sound like a good friend. ... (read in full...)
Should I Move On?
Q. i'm in love with this guy i've know since i was 15, we started dating in September and after a month, he broke up with me because he still had some feelings for his ex who he left 2 months before our relationship because his ex was sleeping with a ...
A. 5 November 2010: Usually I would suggest moving on but then a thought occured. Why rush something like this? You have known him since you were fifteen and only recently have you started dating. Moving on so quickly may cause unecessary tension between the two of ... (read in full...)
Marriage - why should any man bother?
Q. Women… why should any guy propose marriage? Full disclosure: I have never been married, but several family members and friends have been hurt by divorce, and I know of only a handful of happy marriages over one year old. My feelings for the...
A. 1 November 2010: Danielepew, do you truly believe that simply because the community that governs us has wrapped their greedy claws around such a precious ceremony, no one should get married?
Odds is overlooking the simple changes made once two people get married.... (read in full...)
Marriage - why should any man bother?
Q. Women… why should any guy propose marriage? Full disclosure: I have never been married, but several family members and friends have been hurt by divorce, and I know of only a handful of happy marriages over one year old. My feelings for the...
A. 30 October 2010: I could not help stumbling upon this post. It is an interesting article, an interesting point of view and an interesting and welcome perspective that I shall consider deeply. Having said that, I must wholeheartedly disagree.
Generally you are sayi... (read in full...)
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