Is this normal... or not?
Q. Tell me if this is normal or not. I am a 14 year old girl who occasioally likes watching sex scenes from movies... Not real dirty ones just ones that make me " hot" if you will. Some of you may know how it feels ... How good it feels when you are ...
A. 4 July 2009: It's totally normal. That is one of the perks of being an adult : ) (but there's a hell of a lot of rubbish you have to put up with and sort out as well! : ( Welcome to adulthood ... ; )... (read in full...)
Why do I want to throw up when I remember my ex?
Q. I have this problem..all my friends say i lost a lot of weight. I just got out of a relationship and I know that this is the reason. Its not that I don't have an appetite to eat. I do have!! The problem is when I start to eat, I remember my ex and I ...
A. 3 July 2009: Unfortunately it seems to me that your unresolved distress about losing your partner is manifesting itself as a fixation over eating. If you feel sick, and cannot eat, you are really deeply upset: in a way, by feeling like this and not eating, your ... (read in full...)
We want to elope but I don't want my parents to feel cheated in seeing me get married.
Q. My boyfriend asked me to marry him a week ago and we still haven’t told anyone. We want to avoid the tension, stress and drama that come with planning a wedding and not to mention the debt. We just want to go on a tropical vacation together and ...
A. 1 July 2009: I'm sure your parents would want you to do what you want, but I think they will also feel sad that they haven't been able to show their love for you in helping with the wedding and all of that.
You might think now that you don't want a wedding,... (read in full...)
I feel like such a sinking wreck...
Q. I'm beginning to feel like my life has come to a halt. Just come out of a bad and messy split with my fiancee of 5 years-he has been emotionally abusive and has completely and utterly financially drained me-i managed to get debt help but my cred...
A. 30 June 2009: ok, just don't worry about the money thing - just deal in cash and don't spend what you don't have, and after a while you will feel secure again. so long as you have enough to pay your way, that's fine - buying leather sofas, etc, is a long way down ... (read in full...)
How do people stay away from others they know are bad for them?
Q. Help me. Besides being a bit of a Well, I cheated. I didn't enjoy sleeping with a stranger. I strongly suspect he was more attracted to my pocket book than to me. I understand now that it was not destiny, but i don't really understand what it ...
A. 30 June 2009: Hmm. I know what you mean, as i think i am attracted to the same type. Sexy, foreign and in need. I also try to rescue them, and end up in an unsuitable relationship and badly treated one way or another.
To be honest, I think you only live onc... (read in full...)
Does he really want a threesome, or is it just a fantasy?
Q. I am confused. My boyfriend and I have been together almost a year. We had the "fantasy" discussion. He said he wants a threesome. I asked why and he said its a fantasy. I said well I wouldn't want you to have sex with the other woman. His response ...
A. 30 June 2009: so it was you freaking out because he fantasized about having a threesome ... poor guy ... he just told you ... because you asked. and i guess that around 99% of sexually charged guys would have had the same fantasy. and as lots of people have said, ... (read in full...)
I've been married for 11 years to the wrong man!
Q. I have been married for eleven years to the wrong man. I love my husband as a friend but am not in love and I don't think I have ever been. I knew the day we got married and he called me a bitch before walking down the isle I was making a huge ...
A. 29 June 2009: This man isn't capable, at the moment, of being either husband or father. Particularly father. You will be hurt and damaged by his behaviour, but at least you had the whole of your childhood and life before him to develop. Your boys haven't got that ... (read in full...)
Girls want what other girls want, or they want what they can't have, true?
Q. In my dealings with women I've noticed they want men who are desired by other females. I've noticed girls flirt more with guys they know already have a partner and they shun the single guy. Is there something in their DNA that makes them go after ...
A. 29 June 2009: There is maybe something in this. If a guy is with someone, on some level as a woman you think he must be ok then, as he has been taken on by some other woman. If a guy is single, you wonder why.
Of course, that's pretty daft, because there ar... (read in full...)
Naked and cuffed to the bed and now wife won't talk to me!
Q. hello,I just got married few weeks ago we are on our honeymoon..one night I decided to be kinky after dinner and decided for bondage,my wife my against being tied;so I handcuffed my self to the hotel bed..she was downstairs for dinner,so I had the ...
A. 29 June 2009: what's wrong with her? she should have been sweet and kind to you, and seen the funny side, and certainly covered you up! so, you lost the key - accidents happen.
sorry, but i wouldn't feel like crawling around her for forgiveness, i would fe... (read in full...)
My teenage son enjoys child pornography. Please help!
Q. Well, this is embarrasing too say as a mother for starts. But I will anyways.. It all started with me finding my son who is 14 years old, with my finding porn on his computer, in his drawers. Stuff like that.. sounds normal so far, right? B...
A. 29 June 2009: This sounds like it has spread not just to yr son, but around his family and friends. It really has to be stopped, as it is very unhealthy and wrong, I think.
I would talk to the parents of all the children involved, and also talk to your doc... (read in full...)
She wants nothing to do with me, but I want to be her friend
Q. How do I get over my ex GF. I dumped her becuase she kept on being too overprotective and controlling. Anyway now she wants NOTHING and I mean NOTHING to do with me. Anyway I want to be her friend her being as stubborn as she is says no her excuse i...
A. 29 June 2009: She is moving on. She has to, because she wanted you and you dumped her, so can you imagine how she felt? Awful. And the only way for her to get over it was to cut all contact with you, because when she sees you or hears from you it brings back all ... (read in full...)
Does he really want a threesome, or is it just a fantasy?
Q. I am confused. My boyfriend and I have been together almost a year. We had the "fantasy" discussion. He said he wants a threesome. I asked why and he said its a fantasy. I said well I wouldn't want you to have sex with the other woman. His response ...
A. 29 June 2009: Who initiated the fantasy discussion? If it was him, it's true that maybe he wanted to because he wanted to see how you would react to the idea.
I don't believe it means he loves you any more or less - it is just a fantasy, and if, like most guy... (read in full...)
Is it just the attention from another male that makes me feel well?
Q. This is going to sound horrible.. and I already feel like I know the responses I will recieve.. but here I go. Long story short, my friend and I went out drinking one nite.. met sum guys, talked for about 3 hours and the one guy and I made out for a ...
A. 28 June 2009: There's nothing to criticise you for - quite the opposite - you've done nothing, and you are carefully thinking about what you should do next. You have hit on the essential question: is he just exaggerating his marital problems because he fanci... (read in full...)
I know it might seem that my ego is just wounded but I know there's something that isn't adding up! Any suggestions?
Q. I split up with my boyfriend of 2 years recently. I have a child and he was great with her. Before we dated, he claimed he was very open with his emotions but it couldn't have been further from the truth. He clammed up at any mention of emotions ...
A. 28 June 2009: Not coming during intercourse isn't just a small problem ... it is very rare, and strange. If it is an emotional issue (which it v likely is), then it means he can't let go - he can't forget himself and trust for those moments. On a very deep level. ... (read in full...)
Painful sex...
Q. Whenever I have sex, if the guy goes in deep I get a really sharp pain, is there something wrong with me? Do I need to worry about this and is there anything I can do to help the pain?...
A. 28 June 2009: It may well be that your uterus points sort of backwards a bit (instead of pointing up, it points slightly down - and then if a guy pushes against that, it pushes the tip backwards and that makes the whole thing be pushed back, and it REALLY hurts - ... (read in full...)
We've tried everything we can think of, but I just can't get pregnant!
Q. hi guys , i have been married for 2 years and trying to concieve for 1 year and half but no luck . we have tried different positions . but i want to know whats the best position for getting pregnant ? and can i still get pregnant if i'm on top or...
A. 28 June 2009: Firstly, you have my total sympathy because i know what it is like to be 'trying' ... but don't give up. It may seem like a massive thing, getting pregnant - but really it can happen v easily, in the blink of an eye, and as there is nothing wrong ... (read in full...)
All he ever did was break my heart...
Q. I recently split up with my bf, I had only been with him for 3 months, and the last of which doesnt really count as I was ignored completely. However, the previous month, I was seeing him whilst he was still with his girlfriend. I thought that we ...
A. 26 June 2009: ok ... this stuff hurts, and it doesn't matter if you're 20, or 40, or however old. it doesn't matter if he's your first or your thirty-first. it doesn't matter that it was 'only' a couple of months. the thing is that YOU opened your heart to him ... (read in full...)
I'm lost and heartbroken that her parents are making her marry someone else!
Q. We were in love for the past 10 years,we are from different religions and now my girlfriends parents are forcing her to get married to someone, she really cant go against her parents wish and wants us to call off our relationship.Its been 10 years ...
A. 26 June 2009: Gina is right. This is such a difficult situation for you both, but for your girlfriend I'm afraid the choice is either to do what her parents say and lose you (and have possibly a very horrible life with a husband she didn't want), or to leave and ... (read in full...)
Mom at 12! Pregnant again at 13!
Q. ok so i was 12 when i got pregnant with my first set of twins and now im 13 and my boyfriend the father of my last set of twins got me pregnant again and its twins again they will only be 11 months apart and im only 13. What am i supposed to do? I ...
A. 25 June 2009: Good luck with it all. I'm sure it will be fine. You have done things a bit differently to how a lot of other people would, but you will have four beautiful children and I'm sure that whatever happens, you will only ever be happy about that. There ... (read in full...)
What are your views on premarital sex?
Q. hi there, what do you think with that I think girls and boys should have sex after getting married(for the first time)no sex before marriage what is your opinion?...
A. 24 June 2009: I think that's fine. I think that there are a lot of good reasons for only sleeping with someone you truly love, after you are married. I think there are also a lot of good reasons for not sleeping around before then.
So yes, I think it's fine. Go... (read in full...)
How can I make amends? I tried to make love to her while she was asleep...
Q. My girlfriend and I have been seeing each other going on five months now, she is the best thing that has ever happened to me by far, we share a lot of the same interests, enjoy the same things, and really hit it off better than I ever thought ...
A. 24 June 2009: ps
and to the person who said any woman would be cross ...
no, not any woman, because I certainly wouldn't be - I would be delighted.
And I promise I am a woman. : )
nx... (read in full...)
How can I make amends? I tried to make love to her while she was asleep...
Q. My girlfriend and I have been seeing each other going on five months now, she is the best thing that has ever happened to me by far, we share a lot of the same interests, enjoy the same things, and really hit it off better than I ever thought ...
A. 24 June 2009: Hmm. I don't think I'm the best person to answer this, because I can't quite empathise with her, even though I too am a woman.
If I love someone and feel very physically close to someone, then I am truly happy whenever he makes any advances... (read in full...)
How long was your first kiss with a new person?
Q. This is just a general question. But when you had your first kiss ever, or even a first kiss with a new person, how long did it last? Because I had my first kiss ever a few weeks ago and it lasted for over an hour. We obviously broke apart t...
A. 23 June 2009: Sounds great. And anything that feels good is normal (or better than normal!). ... (read in full...)
My life feels like dog dirt
Q. i really need some advice ive been with my boyfriend 5 years. i have to say for the past 4 years it has been terrible-ive only stayed because i did love him. he has been so distant and cold from me-he has left me in serious financial debt. h...
A. 22 June 2009: I'm so sorry. I know exactly what it feels like to love someone and do all you can for them, and for them to treat you badly and seem to be completely ungrateful for all you've done. I'm afraid the only way to get through it is to see them for the ... (read in full...)
I broke up with her and now she is devestated
Q. its long ...but will tell you everything about us ...pleae bear with me and read it ...my heartly thanks to all answerers ...i am in a weird situation people ...i dumped this 17 year old girl and she has become quite obsessed about me ....we have ...
A. 21 June 2009: why don't you want to be with her?... (read in full...)
What do I do with this pain?
Q. my heart is a mesh and my soul is darkenned. Many times I feel hopeless in this world. I have a child who is the only one that keeps me going. But the light that my child gives me is easily tarnished by his father. A man who abandoned my child and ...
A. 20 June 2009: I"m so sorry. I know exactly what you are talking about. The pain of loving a man's child, but that man not loving you or the child, is most excruciating. It is a thankless, hidden struggle, and you will often, or always, be doing the right thing, ... (read in full...)
Mom at 12! Pregnant again at 13!
Q. ok so i was 12 when i got pregnant with my first set of twins and now im 13 and my boyfriend the father of my last set of twins got me pregnant again and its twins again they will only be 11 months apart and im only 13. What am i supposed to do? I ...
A. 19 June 2009: ok, so that is great - your babies are fine. Look, someone said 'age is just a number', and they're right. It doesn't matter how old you are, just how you feel.
You know, there isn't really any advice to give here, apart from to have the courage ... (read in full...)
He is terrible, why can't I let him go?
Q. I met this guy online on a website not for dating. He contacted me first after I posted something about a video he did. He is the same age as me and kind in the same situation. Neither of us had been in a real relationship. I was not looking for ...
A. 19 June 2009: have you actually ever met up with this guy? (and yes, he sounds like a total idiot - just stop replying - it's like giving up cigarettes or alcohol, and much easier if he's only virtual - find a real guy) nx... (read in full...)
We've tried everything we can think of, but I just can't get pregnant!
Q. hi guys , i have been married for 2 years and trying to concieve for 1 year and half but no luck . we have tried different positions . but i want to know whats the best position for getting pregnant ? and can i still get pregnant if i'm on top or...
A. 18 June 2009: ps and just read some of the other answers - i am sure you didn't mean anal by dogie!!!!!
doggie is a perfectly efficient way of getting pregnant. the best is whatever gets him the deepest (and therefore his sperm) ... and then lying still an... (read in full...)
We've tried everything we can think of, but I just can't get pregnant!
Q. hi guys , i have been married for 2 years and trying to concieve for 1 year and half but no luck . we have tried different positions . but i want to know whats the best position for getting pregnant ? and can i still get pregnant if i'm on top or...
A. 17 June 2009: Hi there
I am convinced the most important thing is that you're relaxed, happy and healthy. The position really doesnt matter at your age, if everything else is good. This is my advice:
for 3 months -
don't drink any alcohol
drink lots of wat... (read in full...)
Should I terminate this pregnancy?
Q. right so im pregnant and I want to keep it as i belive that we have been stupid enough to get ourselves into this mess no will we have to live with the consiquences, however my boyfriend says that were are too young (were 20)) that hes in army and ...
A. 17 June 2009: I think if you take an over view of what everyone has said here, it is pretty much that the baby is the thing you will most regret losing ... and that is the least you will feel. You could (and probably would) feel guilty for the rest of your ... (read in full...)
Can a marriage survive without sexual intimacy?
Q. Can a marriage survive without sexual intimacy? My husband does not want me in bed. What is wrong? He says, he has no idea what happened. Should I divorce him? He does not want to go to therapy. What else can I try,before divorce?...
A. 17 June 2009: May be he has some kind of medical problem? I think you should go to the docs first.
How does he feel about this? Does he say he's sorry, or feel bad for you? Does he say that despite that, he still loves you? Is he physically affectio... (read in full...)
Should I terminate this pregnancy?
Q. right so im pregnant and I want to keep it as i belive that we have been stupid enough to get ourselves into this mess no will we have to live with the consiquences, however my boyfriend says that were are too young (were 20)) that hes in army and ...
A. 17 June 2009: All of your argument is good apart from one thing - I believe you aren't right that if you keep the baby he will hate you. There are two experiences neither of you have had - one is having a baby, and the other is killing a baby. So for both of ... (read in full...)
Mom at 12! Pregnant again at 13!
Q. ok so i was 12 when i got pregnant with my first set of twins and now im 13 and my boyfriend the father of my last set of twins got me pregnant again and its twins again they will only be 11 months apart and im only 13. What am i supposed to do? I ...
A. 16 June 2009: I'm very sorry to hear about the miscarriage - it must have been horrible for you. I hope you are ok.
AFter this, I do hope you will be really careful. Get some proper contraception and concentrate on looking after your babies - and yourself... (read in full...)
Mom at 12! Pregnant again at 13!
Q. ok so i was 12 when i got pregnant with my first set of twins and now im 13 and my boyfriend the father of my last set of twins got me pregnant again and its twins again they will only be 11 months apart and im only 13. What am i supposed to do? I ...
A. 16 June 2009: Well, what is your situation now? How are you living, with the babies? Are you all living together? What involvement do your and his parents have? Are you yourself going to school at all?
Presumably having two more babies would mean it just con... (read in full...)
How can I help my son?
Q. Hi, strange as it may seem, Im after some help for my teenage son. To cut a long story short, hes known a girl for just over a year, they got engaged, broke up, engagement off, got back together, then lost a baby, broke up, got back together. this ...
A. 14 June 2009: It's difficult to see your son crying and needing someone, but I think that as a mother (as the adult most there to help him cope with things), I feel you should explain and then reinforce again and again that she is not the only girl in the ... (read in full...)
I came home and my husband was gone!! I'm shocked and feeling lost!
Q. My Husband and I have been married almost two years now. Two days ago I came home from work and he was gone. He only took some clothes and our dog from the backyard. He didn't leave a note and he hasn't called me to even say why he left or if he's ...
A. 13 June 2009: He sounds to me like he has a problem coping with responsibility, and he messes up, and then just can't deal with what he's done. You are sensible and only controlling in the sense that you want things to run smoothly and normally, i guess ... he ... (read in full...)
I came home and my husband was gone!! I'm shocked and feeling lost!
Q. My Husband and I have been married almost two years now. Two days ago I came home from work and he was gone. He only took some clothes and our dog from the backyard. He didn't leave a note and he hasn't called me to even say why he left or if he's ...
A. 12 June 2009: Also, bit strange that you said you had no idea why he left, but now you are going to counselling and wondering if he will ever forgive you ... sounds to me like you have a very good idea why he left. ... (read in full...)
I came home and my husband was gone!! I'm shocked and feeling lost!
Q. My Husband and I have been married almost two years now. Two days ago I came home from work and he was gone. He only took some clothes and our dog from the backyard. He didn't leave a note and he hasn't called me to even say why he left or if he's ...
A. 12 June 2009: So what exactly have you been doing to him?
And how did he screw up? It sounds like maybe you never quite forgave him for that, and have been controlling him ever since. What form does that take? Whatever it is, it has completely sent him off his ... (read in full...)
Do I stay in a marriage where he ignores me?
Q. I think , I might have to leave my marriage, but I'm so scared to do that. My husband makes me feel totally unloved, and I suffer everyday from this. I was trying to do a lot of self improvements, and I'm stronger now, and more confident, but ...
A. 12 June 2009: I don't think you should just get divorced.
I think you should:
- go for counselling
or
(and this will sound radical)
- take a lover (that is what the French do, and the Italians, and from what I have heard, it often works)
You need someo... (read in full...)
I came home and my husband was gone!! I'm shocked and feeling lost!
Q. My Husband and I have been married almost two years now. Two days ago I came home from work and he was gone. He only took some clothes and our dog from the backyard. He didn't leave a note and he hasn't called me to even say why he left or if he's ...
A. 12 June 2009: ps
and for the moment, you absolutely must leave him be - don't try to talk to him if he has said he doesn't want to. Wait until he comes to you. You can't force this.
Of course, there is the other issue of his utter meanness in leaving you ... (read in full...)
I came home and my husband was gone!! I'm shocked and feeling lost!
Q. My Husband and I have been married almost two years now. Two days ago I came home from work and he was gone. He only took some clothes and our dog from the backyard. He didn't leave a note and he hasn't called me to even say why he left or if he's ...
A. 12 June 2009: Well, good news that he hasn't actually disappeared but just think about what he has done, and why ... he has just abandoned you, leaving you to worry and not know where he was. Other people have helped in this. You do, I think, need to analyse ... (read in full...)
I came home and my husband was gone!! I'm shocked and feeling lost!
Q. My Husband and I have been married almost two years now. Two days ago I came home from work and he was gone. He only took some clothes and our dog from the backyard. He didn't leave a note and he hasn't called me to even say why he left or if he's ...
A. 11 June 2009: Well unless you're not telling the whole story (but I'm sure you are!) then it looks horribly like he has done a disappearing act on you. But what about his parents? And friends? What do they say? Aren't they worried that maybe something has ... (read in full...)
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