I called off the wedding. But how do I get past the guilt if I leave him?
Q. I was until recently, engaged to be married. I called off the wedding because my fiancé yells a lot, is very stressed (life choices, poor planning, disorganization, plus regular stresses of job, kids, etc.), blames me and others for everything, ...
A. 26 June 2014: A little bit of guilt is natural, but certainly better than being miserable for your marriage. Just dump him for God sakes. Just hearing about him is annoying I can't imagine being with someone like that. ... (read in full...)
He's showing no remorse and says my insecurity is the issue. Am I over-reacting over the video?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been off and on for the past 3 years. Within the past 5 months we have finally decided to get serious. We've been living together for 3 months. In the past out relationship has majorly been unstable because of his lack of ...
A. 26 June 2014: I don't think it matters if you're right, wrong, insecure, or secure. YOU'RE NOT HAPPY. If you're not happy what's the point of being with him? Will the paranoia go away anytime soon? Are you sure he won't cheat? Is this how you want to live?
... (read in full...)
My boyfriend never takes care of me
Q. I have been in a relationship for 2years and 2 months. He never takes care of me, he's always complaining about not having Money. Whenever I bring up the issue, he's like how will I know your needs when you don't ask me? I decided not to ask him for ...
A. 26 June 2014: If you don't like the fact that your boyfriend doesn't give you money then you're with the wrong guy. ... (read in full...)
Etiquette for sex and periods??
Q. I have recently got a new boyfriend, everything's going well, but I have a question so looking for some advice for people in the same situation. We have a lot of sex, which is great, I'm loving it, especially after having none for a good few years...
A. 26 June 2014: If he's a grown man then a pad shouldn't bug him. However, if you think you'll be getting intimate you should do a smell check. Sometimes women can be a little smellier than normal during their periods and it may be enough to at least keep him from ... (read in full...)
Just broke up with gf of 2,5 years for lying.
Q. Hey everybody, So my gf and I went on a vacation last week. On the third day of our (up untill this point lovely) vacation I noticed her recieving a text message and her acting shady. In all these years I have NEVER allowed myself to be jealous. S...
A. 26 June 2014: I would never have guessed you weren't a native speaker so no need to add that apology anymore.
I think you're second guessing yourself because of the "who knows" nature of the situation. What she was doing was inappropriate. The attentio... (read in full...)
How can I find out if he's interested without making it awkward?
Q. I’ve known this guy for about 4 months now. We usually see each other just at church every Sunday, but we sometimes hang out with a group and go to dinner and/or a movie. I usually end up walking/sitting beside him and I developed a crush on him ...
A. 26 June 2014: How about the old fashioned way: ask him out. There's no reason a "no thanks" has to be awkward.
"I'm sorry I see you more as a friend." is the likely "no" answer. Nothing to worry about.
The yes answer would be worth the chance wouldn't ... (read in full...)
He went away without me and I feel like I need to even the score
Q. My BF of a year and a half is away for a month. Visiting family in South America. I am not going because I have no $$. He knows this and still went for a month without me. I am hurt and jealous and annoyed. It comes after several rocky months of him ...
A. 25 June 2014: The best suggestion I can give is to start thinking of things from his point of view. Because you can't afford to go with him he shouldn't be able to visit his family? If you don't think that's okay then it's time to learn to be less selfish.
... (read in full...)
How can I trust my boyfriend when he promises he won't cheat on me again?
Q. I want to be able to trust my boyfriend, I really do but at times I can't help but doubt what he says when I know he has cheated and lied to me before. We have been together on and off for four years, nearly five. He cheated on me after about a ye...
A. 25 June 2014: There's a good reason you can't trust him and it's not your insecurities... It's the fact that he's repeatedly cheated on you.
To make matters worse he's been able to get you back every time, so if he is tempted again he'll probably just tell him... (read in full...)
Girlfriend doesn't want my daughter around when she has her daughter around. How to work through this?
Q. My girlfriend and I, both in our 40's, have been together for over 2 years, and have 6 kids in total. Like any relationship we've had our ups and downs and I'm happy to say however that the good have definitely out weighed the bad. One of the stre...
A. 24 June 2014: I see where she's coming from. I have two young kids and on occasion I like to hang out with them individually so that we can be a little closer than if their sister was also there.
HOWEVER, your gf is telling you she wants a permanent arrangem... (read in full...)
Dating for 9 months. Now she's decided that she's not ready for a relationship? What can I do?
Q. She told she is not ready for relationship, I've been dating her for nine months. Now and all of the sudden this happens. What do i do ? Do i wait ? We headed off since we first met everything was good we had great conversations we wen...
A. 24 June 2014: More than likely she's realized that you're not 'the one'. It can take awhile for people to realize that, but when they do its more or less over.
It's possible that you're just incompatible. It's also possible that she really likes you but does... (read in full...)
Should I try to change career?
Q. I'm a 22 year old female, i have a son who is four years old. I have been in and out of jobs since he was born but i never stick to a job. I am now studying towards a law degree but i feel like giving up already, i thought it would be for me but i ...
A. 24 June 2014: I forgot to add that there are plenty of careers that may not make you rich but are very enjoyable.
My brother is a whale watching captain and gets to spend lots of time on the boat and at the beach, among other things.
Another frien... (read in full...)
Should I try to change career?
Q. I'm a 22 year old female, i have a son who is four years old. I have been in and out of jobs since he was born but i never stick to a job. I am now studying towards a law degree but i feel like giving up already, i thought it would be for me but i ...
A. 24 June 2014: While being a cop may be glamorous to some people I don't think it's a particularly enjoyable job and it can be dangerous, especially for women as men tend to feel like they can get the best of them. Women police officers probably get assaulted more ... (read in full...)
I want an independant man, and I'm seeing a momma's boy
Q. I have been dating my partner for many years now. At first we both lived in a different town to our families and thats how we met. when the time came to move home he decided to move my way leaving family and friends behind, we bought a place ...
A. 23 June 2014: Then you're not right for each other because this is who he is. ... (read in full...)
I am my ex boyfriend's booty call .....
Q. My boyfriend split up with me in February, because "he didn't love me anymore and the spark wasn't there".. He has been sleeping with ALOT of girls, and drinking ALOT! I have been sleeping with him still, but now I'm starting to get jealous and have ...
A. 22 June 2014: You're still with him because you hope he'll choose you and return. Well, he had that chance and he obviously is not choosing you. No big deal, he wasn't right for you anyways.
So, realize that he won't choose you, now or later, and that even if ... (read in full...)
We're not handling conflict well in this relationship
Q. Hello, How do I handle it when my boyfriend (of one year) gets mad at me for getting mad at him when HE does something wrong, hurtful, disrespectful. Then after I get mad about it (rightfully so, these are big things) he does something WORSE ...
A. 20 June 2014: How do you know that the things you're getting mad at him for doing are things that he agrees with? Not everyone has the same idea of what's wrong.
If he's doing something you don't like on a regular basis then you're going to have to get used... (read in full...)
Boyfriend is hurtful and neglectful and I'm feeling really down about the relationship
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for 4 years. He just doesn't care about me anymore. He just told me 2 nights ago he loves me, and I believe in some weird way he does but he doesn't show it anymore. He hardly texts, hardly calls and hardly wants to spend ...
A. 18 June 2014: It's not your job to take care of him, he's a grown man. If he wants to neglect you that's his right and he has to live with the potential consequences. If you stay with him you'll always be unhappy. ... (read in full...)
Why don't people put their relationship status on facebook?
Q. What is the reason people don't put their relationship status on facebook? I've noticed some people don't when it's obvious they have a girlfriend because of their pics and statuses. ...
A. 18 June 2014: Because its just Facebook. ... (read in full...)
How do I tell her without offending her about her wiping issue?
Q. Hi I just started dating a new girl . The sex is great and we both oral fixated me giving and her getting . There is one problem she wants her anus licked which I usually enjoy doing but there is a problem with this she has a wiping problem back ...
A. 18 June 2014: Buy her some wipes and tell her if she wants you do do it she needs to be as clean as possible for health reasons. You don't have to tell her that she doesn't wipe properly. ... (read in full...)
Why would he say, "in another life, we would have been inseparable"?
Q. Can someone help me understand? I'm just getting to know this guy and our relationship is growing by the day. But he said something really odd and I couldn't reply except say "oh ok" because I didn't really understand. He said "I think in another...
A. 18 June 2014: Instead of sitting there looking confused you could have asked him to clarify. It could have been a good conversation. You can still ask him if you're curious but I can't tell you what it means since it doesn't make a lot of sense.
... (read in full...)
How do you know when men just want a break and when they want to end things
Q. How can you tell if a guy wants to "take a break" in a relationship because he's not sure you can make each other happy? Or if he's just trying to let you down easily and not feel so guilty? Me and the boyfriend of two years have been arguing a l...
A. 17 June 2014: It's pretty obvious that he's leaving towards a breakup but needs to string you along so it's easier for him to get over you. While you wait in limbo hoping he'll change his mind he'll be well on his way towards finding someone new.
That'... (read in full...)
Sick and tired of the dating game
Q. I have had another disappointment in my "dating life" today and this was the last drop... I met this girl 10 days ago and we seemed to hit it off quite well. I asked for her number and 3 days later we met for lunch. There again, we had a good ti...
A. 17 June 2014: Let me know if this describes you: you don't want to appear "creepy", you don't want to pressure the woman, you don't like to make a move because you're afraid of what she might say, you find getting physical (holding hands, arm around her, etc) ... (read in full...)
Men, how much do you notice and/or care about saggy breasts?
Q. I'm very close to moving to the next stage of a relationships and getting physical with a man who I have been seeing. I am quite worried though about my breasts which are quite saggy after having fed four children. So honestly men, how much do ...
A. 16 June 2014: Honestly, my opinion doesn't matter because I'm not dating you. Don't worry about it. If he likes you for who you are, that's great. If he doesn't then his loss. You don't want to have to feel like you have to be someone you're not to please a man. ... (read in full...)
She lied about being on dating sites, and now she's gone n/c
Q. Me (F, 20) and my gf (F, 21) are together for nearly 2 years. A while ago, i accidently noticed she was on a dating site. She said she still had it from before we were together, but that she wasnt active on it. I believed her, and just asked he...
A. 16 June 2014: I think the real problem here is that you think this is as good as it gets. Her dishonesty and lack of concern for your feelings should be a deal breaker...
Let's just say she really only wants friends. Why would she lie about her relation... (read in full...)
Lumps after shaving
Q. never had these lums on my vagina at first after shaving 5 month ago i notice the lump on my outside vagina im real stres pls help me. Its not sore either not itchy ...
A. 16 June 2014: Ingrown hair. Just shave with the grain the first pass, then against the grain to get it smooth. At least this is what I have to do on my neck. Sometimes I even go with the grain, the sideways, THEN against the grain, depending on sensitivity.
... (read in full...)
I don't want my F/B message to her to seem creepy
Q. I just went on a three day trip with all the youth in my church. We were broken up into groups and I was in a group with a girl I thought was cute. Over the three days, we became friends and I fell for her. Hard. I didn't get her number since we ...
A. 16 June 2014: Guys your age are too concerned with sounding "creepy". ARE you creepy? Are you messaging her just to feel her boobs? Did she seem to like you? If you answered no, no, yes, then you're a normal human and probably capable of sending a message without ... (read in full...)
Men: What do you think of breast implants?
Q. I just got silicone breast implants and I think they are going to be great. A great improvement over my asymmetrical southbound breasts. Quite large on my rather small frame, but nothing that would draw stares or look like a porn star. Just a ...
A. 16 June 2014: I often hear people say that implants/hair plugs/face lifts/etc aren't done because the person is insecure and I disagree. If you were totally happy with your appearance there'd be no reason to change anything.
HOWEVER, I think a little insecuri... (read in full...)
Men: What do you think of breast implants?
Q. I just got silicone breast implants and I think they are going to be great. A great improvement over my asymmetrical southbound breasts. Quite large on my rather small frame, but nothing that would draw stares or look like a porn star. Just a ...
A. 15 June 2014: I wouldn't tell him, there's no reason to "confess".
All men are different. Some like them as fake looking as possible. I like them when they look very natural otherwise I don't find it attractive. But who can complain about breast implants... (read in full...)
Does your husband ever discount what you are saying and have bad manners?
Q. This is my second marriage. My husband has a bad habit of saying "Whatever" if I am trying to talk about something, even if it is minor talk. He was gone for a couple of days on business and when he got back I was telling him that I observed ...
A. 14 June 2014: I would never treat my wife that way because she would never tolerate it. Stand up for yourself. If he hands you his plate ask him if his legs are broken. You have the right to be treated with respect. ... (read in full...)
I'm worried my girlfriend fancies her personal trainer!
Q. I need your help My girlfriend gos to the gym everyday except weekend and once a week she does a personal trainer session with a lad at first I thought nothing of this now I think she fancy s him she baths every night before seeing him and i...
A. 14 June 2014: Let's just say that your girlfriend's friend is telling the truth (she may be exaggerating or even lying).
It's normal for people, especially women, to enjoy attention received from the opposite sex, especially when they're attractive. So your ... (read in full...)
My vagina doesn't look so nice
Q. Hey guys I don't want him to see my vagina when i was younger i shaved it and i got shaving pimples and i got dark pimple spot and it doesn't look so nice ... what can i do ????...
A. 13 June 2014: Trust me he doesn't care, especially when his penis is out. ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend and my best friend live at each others' houses in my absence! What's going on?
Q. So, I have been with my girlfriend for almost 2 years and she is the love of my life, I can't picture my life without her. but recently she has been hanging around with my best friend alot, I recently found out that (after we had a huge argument) ...
A. 12 June 2014: Sorry but you know the answer. Dump both of them. They deserve each other. Don't feel too bad, you're ridding yourself of two people who don't deserve your company. Find new friends and a new woman you can trust.
Also, while it's natural to feel ... (read in full...)
The new guy that I can't trust, or the old guy who hit me?
Q. i had a bf whose name was Rahul of 4.5 years with whom i was sexually involved.he used to love me a lot but we broke up because he had hit me physically four times and used to abuse a lot.then i found a new guy whose name is Ajay,he is very caring ...
A. 12 June 2014: I would put you in the same category as these other two guys: people to avoid dating.
What you really need to do is forget about both of them, work on bettering yourself, either through counseling or self help books or something, and then, wh... (read in full...)
What should I ask for as an entry level salary?
Q. I'm graduating from college soon and applying to starting positions like Sales Coordinator, Executive Assistant, etc. I don't mind my first job not being ideal; I just want to gain experience and look better on paper. I have only worked in food ...
A. 12 June 2014: I'd say at least 800 Mexican pesos/day. ... (read in full...)
I have a crush on my music teacher..should I tell him how I feel?
Q. Hi, I am a 14 year old freshman in high school, and I kind of have a crush on my music teacher. It's not just because of looks(although he is extremely hot) but because of his outstanding personality as well. He is kind and caring and sweet an...
A. 12 June 2014: Of course you shouldn't... Seriously what good could come out of it? The fact that you even consider it is a big deal!
People always develop crushes for their teachers. It's totally normal. But at your age it should be obvious that that's a... (read in full...)
His mother is putting a strain on our relationship
Q. My fiance (who, by the way, is an only child) and I have been together for what will be four years the end of this month. We had some petty arguments in the beginning but nothing we couldn't work past. Just a little miscommunication and the like. ...
A. 11 June 2014: Since the examples of her bad behavior stem from Facebook why don't you just block her from seeing your posts? I assume you can do that, if not just unfriend her.
I don't see why that should be a big deal. The other things you mentioned happen t... (read in full...)
Why is my friend's girlfriend so friendly to me in front of him?
Q. I have been friends with this guy for a few years. A few months ago he began living with this girl, and still together. They seem to get on very well. She often smiles at me, which I can accept(I get that often from girls, especially when ...
A. 11 June 2014: She wants a threesome at that exact moment. Make it happen! ... (read in full...)
I feel he is not really interested in me but surely he would bother wasting his time like that!
Q. Hi been dating a guy for 5 weeks now we've kissed and been intimate but i don't really think hes that interested in me.....we met on a dating website but he lives locally to me sand id rather he just said if he doesn't think it will go ...
A. 11 June 2014: It's funny that you say he's vague because after reading your question I was kind of scratching my head. Some people like to take things slow. It's good for the long term health of the relationship and since he's already indicated he's not ... (read in full...)
How to make things work with him?
Q. My boyfriend and i met at school. We started dating when we were both 16. We go to universities at opposite ends of the country and have struggled massively with this. constant arguing, barely seeing one another and its reached the point where he ...
A. 11 June 2014: I disagree with the others, I think it's natural to not always feel like you're in love. However it shouldn't happen for extended periods of time. We're talking about a day or two after a big fight.
The problem with your situation is obviousl... (read in full...)
Does it make me sound like a bad mother if I ask my neighbour out? How do I do it without making myself sound desperate and cheap? And would a younger man even be interested in spending time with a woman 11 years older?
Q. Hi everyone I'm a 46 year old divorced working single mom of 4 kids, so needless to say I'm usually very busy with everything. I've been divorced for 3 years now. Here's my dilemma, about a month ago I just moved into a new place that I'm renting ...
A. 11 June 2014: Whether or not he'd be interested is up to him. Not us or you. The only way you'll find out is to ask. Don't be too surprised if he says no, but don't be hurt either, it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. ... (read in full...)
Was my boyfriend's behavior with this other woman suspicious?
Q. My bf and I have been in a long term relationship. Family and friends consider us an old married couple. We attended his friend's daughter's graduation party on a Saturday afternoon. When it was time to leave, we got up to say goodbyes. One wo...
A. 11 June 2014: No big deal ... (read in full...)
We clearly want different things out of life!
Q. My boyfriend and I broke up last year after months of arguing about what we wanted from our relationship. I wanted commitment, a family one day, our own home, whereas he wanted to stay living separately and just carry on taking things slowly. We had ...
A. 10 June 2014: You're talking about the future as if it's the present. If you want a kid now then have a kid. If you don't then wear protection. Having a kid now and later can be two very different things for people.
When I was your age I had a girlfrie... (read in full...)
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