I'm 15, he's 18 and we want to "explore"
Q. Heei, im sophie and im 15 i have a bf thats 18 weve been going out for a year now, we are very much in love. But we have a problem he really wants to explore with me, but we are both very worried about the age difference, could someone please give ...
A. 14 June 2010: Ok, as you are in the UK, the LAW states that it is ILLEGAL for anyone under the age of 16 to have sex.
That includes, fingering, handjobs, oral sex, blow jobs, or vaginal or anal penetration. Basically ANYTHING sexual is ILLEGAL.
At 15, ... (read in full...)
29 years old, never had a relationship
Q. In a nutshell, this is my situation: I'm 29 years old and I've never had a relationship with a girl, never been kissed, never held hands, never been on a date, never even asked one out, and it's suddenly just hit me that I've basically wasted my ...
A. 13 June 2010: You are not less of a person because you lack experience. I know I say that all the time too, but it isn't true. It just feels like it is.
Hang in there, and PM me if you want to talk more. Sometimes just being able to have a long chat and let ... (read in full...)
29 years old, never had a relationship
Q. In a nutshell, this is my situation: I'm 29 years old and I've never had a relationship with a girl, never been kissed, never held hands, never been on a date, never even asked one out, and it's suddenly just hit me that I've basically wasted my ...
A. 12 June 2010: I'd just like to add ... well done for getting thru the PhD. Im currently writing up, and panic stricken that I won't get it finished on time. I know exactly how stressful that is....arghh. ... (read in full...)
29 years old, never had a relationship
Q. In a nutshell, this is my situation: I'm 29 years old and I've never had a relationship with a girl, never been kissed, never held hands, never been on a date, never even asked one out, and it's suddenly just hit me that I've basically wasted my ...
A. 12 June 2010: If you were a woman, I would say I wrote that. Literally.
You are not alone, all I can say is hang in there. I know how terrible it feels, honestly, and there are those on this site who will back up when I say I am an emotional mess most of the t... (read in full...)
Got myself into a dilemma but did I do the right thing?
Q. Hi, I am 26 and my boyfriend is 31. He is a Muslim and I am converting to Islam. We have been together for just over a year and have been having pre-marital sex. I have been a bit upset and ashamed of this for some time as I know it is wrong. I f...
A. 10 June 2010: I think there are many issues here that you are facing, not just the sex before marriage one.
Firstly, you say you have only been together a year, yet you are already converting to his faith. That is a very big step for someone you have not been... (read in full...)
Is it strange for someone my age to have no experience and not be on the pill?
Q. I feel like there is something wrong with me, I am really embarrassed by sex and get shy talking about it so much so that I have always ignored the fact. I have been tryng to face my shyness and have started fooling around with guy eg kissing,...
A. 6 June 2010: Id like to also add a point that chigirl brought up (I was writing my post when she added).
If you are not in a serious long term relationship, it might be worth considering if you want to be pumping chemicals into your body day in day out. Jus... (read in full...)
Is it strange for someone my age to have no experience and not be on the pill?
Q. I feel like there is something wrong with me, I am really embarrassed by sex and get shy talking about it so much so that I have always ignored the fact. I have been tryng to face my shyness and have started fooling around with guy eg kissing,...
A. 6 June 2010: Firstly, I want to let you know you are not on your own, and you are not strange at all. I am your age, and also inexperienced, and there is nothing wrong with that.
I went on the pill a couple of years ago, because things were beginning to get s... (read in full...)
My friend is texting a guy I used to text and it bothers me
Q. my friend has been texting a boy that i once was. she thinks i didnt know bout it but last nite i came out and told her how i feel. she hasnt taking any notice of my feelings, i dont think we are talking now but should i try and make "friends" again ...
A. 6 June 2010: If you and this boy are no longer texting or in a relationship, what is the problem? Are you jealous he is no longer talking to you? You said "once was" - how long ago are we talking? Last week, last month, last year? You have no say over who she ... (read in full...)
How do I keep my mom from finding out I'm having a house party while she's gone?
Q. hey :) well my mum is going away this weekend and i have sort of organised a house party :D but i think i will get cought my neighbors are really strict and horrible and might end up telling my mum :S So i was wondering if you have any suggesti...
A. 23 May 2010: Thanks for the update. That completely changes my view.
Not only are you stupid, irresponsible and rude to your Mother, you are also incredibly selfish.
You say your Dad died recently, yet you are quite happy to go and do this behind your Moth... (read in full...)
How do I keep my mom from finding out I'm having a house party while she's gone?
Q. hey :) well my mum is going away this weekend and i have sort of organised a house party :D but i think i will get cought my neighbors are really strict and horrible and might end up telling my mum :S So i was wondering if you have any suggesti...
A. 23 May 2010: Bottom line, you shouldn't be having a party without your Mum's consent. It is her house after all. And if you go and damage anything, spill anything, she WILL know.
How do you plan to hide all the empties? Are you going to steam clean the whol... (read in full...)
Are men attracted to overweight women?
Q. hey aunties and uncles. I'm going to be direct with this question because I've always wanted to know. is being overweight a real turn off for boys and do they get attracted to overweight girls? I myself am not overweight or anything but I am curious ...
A. 23 May 2010: I do wonder OP if perhaps you are being brainwashed by the glossy magazines, where you have to be a size 0, in order to be beautiful, successful and attractive to the opposite sex?
Life is not like the airbrushed photos you see on TV and magazine... (read in full...)
We have planned that we will start having sex this weekend, and I have some contraception questions!
Q. Me and my boyfriend want to start having sex, and we have kind of planned that it will be this weekend. Im not sure which contraception to use and where i can get it from and how i use it and all that. I know that he already has condoms and i wasnt ...
A. 12 May 2010: Ok, first of all, sex is not something that should be planned out like an army manouver! Your first time probably will not live up to expectations, and will not be the soppy romantic experience you think it will. It may hurt, and you could bleed, so ... (read in full...)
Am I still covered by the morning after pill that I took in the morning?
Q. I took the aftermorning pill yesturday and had unprotected sex again on the night time, will that pill still cover me or will i have to go for another one?...
A. 12 May 2010: You should NEVER rely on the morning after pill as a form of contraception!!!! That is so irresponsible and stupid, not to mention highly dangerous.
The morning after pills are still very new, and the long term side effects are not truely k... (read in full...)
My parents limit the time that my b/f and I can talk on the phone together
Q. Dear Aunties, My parents limit the hours I may text/talk to my boyfriend. my mom won't let me have my phone past 10 on weekdays and 11 on weekends. My boyfriend and I have been together over a year, and I love him. I know I'm only 16 and I know no...
A. 10 May 2010: I think there are two issues here.
1. It is not YOU who pays the bill - it is your fathers work. There may be issues with this. You see it as being free, but they may have "reasonable use" limits imposed, and perhaps they are worried you are goin... (read in full...)
My parents limit the time that my b/f and I can talk on the phone together
Q. Dear Aunties, My parents limit the hours I may text/talk to my boyfriend. my mom won't let me have my phone past 10 on weekdays and 11 on weekends. My boyfriend and I have been together over a year, and I love him. I know I'm only 16 and I know no...
A. 10 May 2010: One other thing - who pays the phone bill?... (read in full...)
My parents limit the time that my b/f and I can talk on the phone together
Q. Dear Aunties, My parents limit the hours I may text/talk to my boyfriend. my mom won't let me have my phone past 10 on weekdays and 11 on weekends. My boyfriend and I have been together over a year, and I love him. I know I'm only 16 and I know no...
A. 10 May 2010: OP, I think you took what I said wrong.
Firstly, you never mentioned that it was HIM doing the pressuring to talk. Everything you said was about you missing him.
I just think you need to get a grip and a little perspective on the situation. J... (read in full...)
My parents limit the time that my b/f and I can talk on the phone together
Q. Dear Aunties, My parents limit the hours I may text/talk to my boyfriend. my mom won't let me have my phone past 10 on weekdays and 11 on weekends. My boyfriend and I have been together over a year, and I love him. I know I'm only 16 and I know no...
A. 10 May 2010: She is doing this for your own good. She KNOWS that given half the chance you would be on the phone until who knows when every morning talking with your boyfriend. At 16 you wouldnt know when to stop. Also, she may be worried about the cost. Your ... (read in full...)
My pregnant fiancé has no energy and won't have sex with me
Q. My fiance doesn't want sex with me anymore... Please help! My fiance doesn't want sex with me anymore. She and I are both young and she is with child. She has no energy, she sits around the house all day, sleeps till after noon, with no job. I t...
A. 9 May 2010: Depending how far gone she is, your fiance probably feels like she has an elephant stuck in her tummy.
Would that make YOU feel like having sex?
Being pregnant is hard. It drains you of energy, because someone else is taking all the nutrient... (read in full...)
IM troubles
Q. I'm in my late twenties. I run my IM while at work, it's OK with my work provided I get my work done. I usually keep my window minimized to my system tray. Occasionally I notice I have a message, pop open the window, respond, and go back to work. ...
A. 8 May 2010: I think that most work places wouldnt allow IM programmes to be used whilst working anyway, regardless of what was going on, as they take time away from the job. I know my Boss would think it was very rude if I had that going on while I was supposed ... (read in full...)
I want to have sex with a grown man
Q. One of my adult friend's won't have sex with her husband unless he has the snip. I talk to him often and we get into conversations about sex. It is becoming increasingly obvious that there is a lot of sexual tension building up in him. We talk about ...
A. 3 May 2010: Your follow up came after I posted.
Even tho you are over the legal age of consent this is still wrong.
You are suggesting he cheat on his wife, and men will say anything to get a quick lay. He will see you as a cheap tart, with whom he can... (read in full...)
I want to have sex with a grown man
Q. One of my adult friend's won't have sex with her husband unless he has the snip. I talk to him often and we get into conversations about sex. It is becoming increasingly obvious that there is a lot of sexual tension building up in him. We talk about ...
A. 3 May 2010: You are underage in the UK, so ANY sexual act with a grown man would be classed as RAPE.
You need to stop talking about sex with this man, and behave yourself. What you are doing in inappropriate, leading him on, and technically inciting him to b... (read in full...)
What do you think about age difference relationships?
Q. Hi everyone. I'm going to try and make this question as short as possible. I work with a lad [I'm a student with a part time job] and have started to develop feelings for him. We have been texting a lot recently, usually just before bed. In t...
A. 3 May 2010: Just a word of warning... dont get your hopes up. Just because he puts kisses at the end of the texts does not mean he likes you as much as you like him. Just because he texts a lot before bed, doesnt mean he wants a relationship. I know to you and ... (read in full...)
How can you tell if someone is playing "hard to get?"
Q. Mod note: OP's own title This may seem like a dumb question but any advice would be helpful. What are the signs someone(in this case a female) close to you, who you are interested in, may be playing hard to get??...
A. 28 April 2010: I would say flirting with you, but not giving you enough to make a move. Little things, laughing the odd touching, but then being aloof. It's difficult. You never really know, and some girls dont actually realise they are being hard to get!
Perso... (read in full...)
Will I look back and regret sleeping with a 46 year old man?
Q. Hi, thanks for your time, I'm 17 and the guy I'm having casual sex with is man who is 46, with the benifit of hindsight will I look back and think what he is doing is wrong? It's just a pattern I've noticed throught life, as I get older I look bac...
A. 25 April 2010: Would this be the same pub that you wanted to take the other older lad to, the one who couldnt commit to girls for long?
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/am-i-asking-for-disappointment-if-i-ask.html
I would suggest staying off the booze, and t... (read in full...)
She's 3 years younger than me, should I be backing away?
Q. Helloo, I'm 17, 18 in August, and I recently started talking to this girl who I met in school about 3 years ago and I've kind of started to like her, we kissed today but there's one problem, she's 14 and not 15 until May. My best friend says I s...
A. 24 April 2010: I think when you are 14 and 18, yes the age does matter.
You will soon be an adult. You will want to have an adult relationship, with all the things that they involve, going out (bars, pubs, clubs, 18+ films) plus the sexual side, she would not ... (read in full...)
I'm worried I might have set my standards too high and I will never meet anyone who is right for me!
Q. Hello, I hope you guys can help. I am almost 25 and a virgin. I can't quite find anyone who is good enough to a) have sex with b) have a REAL relationship with. It's just that I feel as if I have waited for the right guy but all the m...
A. 21 April 2010: Are you religious? Have you tried going to church to meet guys? I know that is a really bad thing to do if you are not religious yourself, and are only going to pursue the local talent, but if you are dead set on meeting a virgin, with no experience ... (read in full...)
I'm worried I might have set my standards too high and I will never meet anyone who is right for me!
Q. Hello, I hope you guys can help. I am almost 25 and a virgin. I can't quite find anyone who is good enough to a) have sex with b) have a REAL relationship with. It's just that I feel as if I have waited for the right guy but all the m...
A. 21 April 2010: I don't share your values, as to me it is the man and the relationship that is important, not the actual sex. I think you are taking this to the extreme. You are cutting out the possibility of a really strong, loving relationship, just because a man ... (read in full...)
Besotted by my teacher...
Q. I am 15 years old and I am in love with a teacher at my school who is 25 years old, I may sound naive but it's not a silly little crush and I didn't choose to like him and I have never been a believer of age meaning anything, also he is single so i ...
A. 20 April 2010: He sees you as a pupil and a child.
Nothing will ever happen between you, and if it did, he would be sacked, his career would be ruined, he would never be allowed to work with children again, and possibly end up in jail. Do you want that?
I k... (read in full...)
I'm worried I might have set my standards too high and I will never meet anyone who is right for me!
Q. Hello, I hope you guys can help. I am almost 25 and a virgin. I can't quite find anyone who is good enough to a) have sex with b) have a REAL relationship with. It's just that I feel as if I have waited for the right guy but all the m...
A. 20 April 2010: I am a similar age to you, I am also a virgin, and I am waiting for someone special to come along, but in many ways I cannot relate to how you are thinking at all. We are not teenagers anymore, and you have to expect people to have a past romantic ... (read in full...)
Help! I need some advice about my mothers controlling attitude
Q. Help! I need some advice about my mothers controlling attitude! I'm 26 and live at home but am currently house hunting so I'm hoping some of my issues will subside, My mum has a way of making everyone feel guilty and ever since I was small...
A. 18 April 2010: I am the same age as you, and I live at home. And my Mother is EXACTLY the same. I understand totally how you feel.
Who are you talking to? What are you doing? Where are you going? WHO is that?
She just HAS to know EVERYTHING about your life,... (read in full...)
Am I asking for disappointment if I ask this "lad" out to the pub?
Q. Recently I hooked up with a guy who I would call a bit of a "lad" he's older than me (20) and is very confident ad doesn't stay with one girl very long if any time at all really! I was considering asking him out to the pub or somewhere as I quite li...
A. 17 April 2010: FYI, drinking age in UK is 18. Drinking age in USA is 21 - so you are underage for either of those countries.
Just because you have not been ID checked yet, does not mean you wont be in the future, and I think that is incredibly stupid and arro... (read in full...)
My mum found out I have been smoking and now she is mad at me, what can I do?
Q. my mum just found out i was smoking, she found them in my bag she no longer trusts me, coz she asked me ages ago if i smoked and i said no i only said no because i didnt want to hurt her she is acting like its the end of the world i have 3 brot...
A. 16 April 2010: I am glad you have patched things up with your Mum.
Good Luck with keeping off them now.
Tiger x... (read in full...)
Am I asking for disappointment if I ask this "lad" out to the pub?
Q. Recently I hooked up with a guy who I would call a bit of a "lad" he's older than me (20) and is very confident ad doesn't stay with one girl very long if any time at all really! I was considering asking him out to the pub or somewhere as I quite li...
A. 16 April 2010: If you actually want a meaningful relationship, and a proper boyfriend, stay well away from him.
You would only be disapointed if you wanted more than a one night stand from him. If you are happy to share him with countless other girls, then I a... (read in full...)
Teenage Pregnancy
Q. Its like a taboo subject isnt it. A lot of people judge teenages who fall pregnant, i know this all too well. I was at the tender age of 15 when i had my first daughter then caught on again at 17 and had my second daughter. The remarks you get the ...
A. 16 April 2010: KC, I agree with everything you said 100%.
I think what we want to try and get across is that teenage pregnancy should not be glorified, and it should not be encouraged in any way at all.
OP, I am glad for you, that your life is working out f... (read in full...)
My mum found out I have been smoking and now she is mad at me, what can I do?
Q. my mum just found out i was smoking, she found them in my bag she no longer trusts me, coz she asked me ages ago if i smoked and i said no i only said no because i didnt want to hurt her she is acting like its the end of the world i have 3 brot...
A. 16 April 2010: Smoking is just a totally disgusting habit. Do you actually know what you are breathing in every time you take a drag? The chemicals and particles in the smoke just as bad as sitting next to a car exhaust for a couple of hours.
What your Mum is u... (read in full...)
Isaac and Me
Q. hi guys i had just turned 13 when i found out i was 6 weeks pregnant i didnt know what to do i didnt tell my mum i went straigt to my boyfriend and told him we were going to have a baby he sayed thats great but i didnt hear from him again so i ...
A. 15 April 2010: Miamine, I think it was me those names were meant for. Altho quite why we get the abuse for giving our opinion and not glorifying teenage pregnancy I dont know. All I am doing is showing the other side of the coin. Not everyone agrees with money ... (read in full...)
Isaac and Me
Q. hi guys i had just turned 13 when i found out i was 6 weeks pregnant i didnt know what to do i didnt tell my mum i went straigt to my boyfriend and told him we were going to have a baby he sayed thats great but i didnt hear from him again so i ...
A. 14 April 2010: I think you have been very very lucky.
Most underage mums DO NOT get 3 bedroom houses just by going to ask. There are THOUSANDS of families on waiting lists for years, living in cramped conditions waiting to be given bigger houses. I think yo... (read in full...)
I'm about to run away
Q. [Moderator note: this post has been edited for clarity] my mom promised me a phone for christmas. She said the place was too busy and she said we'd get one 'tomorrow'. That happened again and I still didnt get it. Today she got a phone (for herse...
A. 14 April 2010: Do you get an allowence? Pocket Money? What about Birthdays, Christmas?
My Mother has a saying. I WANT never gets. This is because it shows a lack of respect and is just plain greedy.
Have you ever said PLEASE, and THANK YOU? or do you just e... (read in full...)
I'm scared of getting pregnant at 14, but I really want to have sex!
Q. me and my boyfriend have been together 7and half months, he means everything to me and we've started to touch each other but i do want to have sex with him but we're not sure, im scared of gettin pregnant at 14, but do you think im pushing to far ...
A. 14 April 2010: You say you love him, you say he is the "one".
Does that mean you are prepared for him to go to jail, if he has sex with you?
Now, I am not going to patronise you, but I am going to treat you like an Adult. Adults have to obey the laws of the ... (read in full...)
I confessed I had sent fake pics to my online boyfriend, ..now he wants to see the real me but I am scared he wont like what he see's.
Q. I've been in a long distance relationship for 9 months. We're recently broken up, and I showed my boyfriend fake pictures, and only JUST showed him my actual self a few days ago. I was terrified to tell him, but he actually took it MUCH better than ...
A. 14 April 2010: You have had a boyfriend you have never met, and after nine months, and a breakup you have only just shown him a picture of your real self?
Can you not see what the actual problem is here?
I am guessing you met this guy on the internet? I hate... (read in full...)
Is it better if he stays in the army or leaves?
Q. Hello, My boyfriend has just returned to army training, after 2 weeks leave. He has been there for 15 weeks before hand. He has to go to training in england which means he is away from home in Northern Ireland. As soon as he got back he said he ...
A. 13 April 2010: If he really doesn't want to be in the Army, then he needs to decide sooner rather than later. Once he finishes his basic training, there is a very high chance that they may well send him out to the front line, depending on which branch of the Army ... (read in full...)
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