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Are men attracted to overweight women?

Tagged as: Dating, Health<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (23 May 2010) 16 Answers - (Newest, 26 May 2010)
A female United Kingdom age 26-29, anonymous writes:

hey aunties and uncles. I'm going to be direct with this question because I've always wanted to know. is being overweight a real turn off for boys and do they get attracted to overweight girls? I myself am not overweight or anything but I am curious and would like to know without trying to cause offense to any overweight women and girls. can anyone tell me the answer? x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2010):

Some guys like their girls big, some like them small. When it comes down to it if you think you are pretty, it shows and you will be much more attractive to others. Confidence really does go a long way!

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (24 May 2010):

CindyCares agony aunt I think bettyb and prion have gloomier views than necessary. Everybody's experiences are different and mine was luckier. The only two really head turning, super hot guys ( one was a model ) I have dated, I met them AFTER I had gained quite a lot of weight due to a health problem.

True, it's not all about personality. You can let you personality come out only when they get to know you, and they can get to know only if they ask you out, and they ask you out only if they find you attractive . BUT 1) tastes vary and there are also guys who like rubenesque 2 ) nobody is perfect and the skinny girl may have a better body but worse skin or teeth or boobs etc. than you

3) confidence really makes miracles. During my "fat " period I was very happy with myself and self confident and felt good in my skin ( for a series of reasons totally unrelated to my weight and looks ). I felt good so somehow I looked good ,I guess.

I don't know.. I also remember that when I lived in NYC I used to see around a lot of very large ,very beautiful Afro-American ladies ( and please don' t misconstrue this as an even remotely racist remark ! Some ethnic groups of Westen African descent are genetically programmed to be bigger and taller than others- that's all I mean ) and they always had these smoking hot guys around them- so i guess fat,not only beauty,is in the eye of the beholder.

As for the fact that older men prefer to date much younger women- it's true. So ? where's the problem ? Older women should just start dating younger men - didn't you see Sexand the City :))

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A female reader, laetitia Canada +, writes (24 May 2010):

laetitia agony auntHi, as everyone else below said, different people like different things. Personally, I would chose a guy who is slightly overweight than a guy who is skin and bones.

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A male reader, Fatherly Advice United States + , writes (24 May 2010):

Fatherly Advice agony auntThanks Prion,

It is so refreshing to be judged fat and ugly and poor for being faithful and loving to my wife. If success is chasing young skirts, Bill Clinton can have it. I want more than that in my life.

FA

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A reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2010):

I'm overweight--though I wasn't in my youth and was considered to be very beautiful. I used to model.

But I have a hormonal disorder that packed 80 pounds on me in my late 20s. I'm now in my 40s and have been unable to get it off.

In my experience, it turns men off. In fact, I had a boss who made several cruel comments about my weight. He once told me straight out that he wouldn't want to have anything to do with me romantically because of it and he frequently urged me to lose it.

I think there probably are a few guys out there who are turned on by heavy women. Heck, the world is full of all kinds of likes and dislikes.

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A female reader, DrPsych United Kingdom +, writes (23 May 2010):

DrPsych agony auntThere was a time in my late 20's when I was classified as 'overweight' because I had a medical condition making me fat. It never stopped me getting boyfriends though! I lost the weight for health reasons but I see enough larger ladies out and about with their men to know it cannot be a big deal.

I think the future of the human race would be in mortal danger if men only fancied stick insects...a third of the American population are obese, 25% of the British population are obese...if none of those people settled down and had families that would put a great baby-making burden on the rest of us!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2010):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

thanks so much to everyone who took the time to answer this question for me. really good advice. in my school, all my friends are paranoid about being overweight and that their boyfriends wouldn't like it if they were 'fat' or ate more than their bf in the cantine at lunchtime. boys my age do go for looks more than personlity but as they mature that will all go away right? I do hope so. and thanks again for all the great advice xx

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (23 May 2010):

CindyCares agony aunt Define overweight. Overweight as compared to what ?...

What is the ideal weight ? And who decided it ?

If you are a raven haired woman, you are not "overdark " or "not blonde enough "-you are you.

There are different sizes and shapes of women, and different men with different preferences. Many men have no preferences about sizes, and some actually favour larger body sizes.

If you are really very heavy , what a doctor would call "morbidly obese ", that can be a turn off, I think. But not because flesh and curves aren't nice to look at. Because it gives an idea of "unhealthy " and men are biologically programmed to secure themselves the healthier mate they can get for reproduction purposes. ( That, also if in real life they want to AVOID having kids ! It's just biochemistry ). But if your weight becomes a medical condition and affects your life quality, - your main problem is protecting your health ,not looking cute for the boys.

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A female reader, celtic_tiger United Kingdom +, writes (23 May 2010):

celtic_tiger agony auntI do wonder OP if perhaps you are being brainwashed by the glossy magazines, where you have to be a size 0, in order to be beautiful, successful and attractive to the opposite sex?

Life is not like the airbrushed photos you see on TV and magazines. The majority of women are probably a little curvy.

What do you class as overweight? By dress size? Is a size 12 too big?

What are your views on the subject? It would be interesting to add to the discussion why you feel the need to ask this question - if as you say you are not overweight. Why feel the need to clarify that if it doesnt matter?

Women, just like men, come in all shapes and sizes, and everyone has a different preference for likes and dislikes. The world would be a very boring place if everyone thought the same thing was attractive.

A question for you to ponder - Looks or personality? What is more important?

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A female reader, Laura1318 Malaysia +, writes (23 May 2010):

Laura1318 agony auntSome men are attracted to confident women and it does not matter about their sizes.

There are also overweight men and they are right for each other.

Men are attracted to overweight women because of their personality ,character and jovial nature.

Some men are attracted at first by the physicals or later by the emotional's.

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A male reader, Fatherly Advice United States + , writes (23 May 2010):

Fatherly Advice agony auntMy first mad crush when I was much closer to your age was with a thin girl with long blond hair. By the time I got married I was attracted to an over weight woman with short very curly hair.

What happened? As it turns out I find that I am attracted to physical features of women that I have had good relationships with. The memories of the successful relationships are tied to those shapes in my mind.

I tend to see in other men that the younger they are the more they focus on size and fashion. As they mature that fades away.

That is as close to a generalization as I am going to make. There are as many different kinds of guys a=out there as there are girls.

FA

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A male reader, Myau New Zealand +, writes (23 May 2010):

Myau agony auntJust as you will find that different women will like different things in men, so it is the same in reverse.

Men's idea of overweight is actually quite obese. We like curves and don't mind women to be quite a bit fatter than you think. 60 - 80kgs is quite fine, its when you start to top 110kgs that we mostly are put off.

Between you and me there is nothing worse than taking a girl to an all you can eat restaurant and her only having a small salad lol.

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A female reader, Plexi Canada +, writes (23 May 2010):

Plexi agony auntMen are attracted to all different sorts of shape, color and size women...........you can not generalize and put them all in the same category, to answer your question, of course some men are attracted to bigger women

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A female reader, PeanutButter United States +, writes (23 May 2010):

PeanutButter agony auntAs a woman who is 6 foot tall and overweight I have to tell you that I have NEVER found it hard to find a man.

Some men absolutely LOVE curves on a woman and the men that I have dated have said emphatically that they do not like skin and bones on women, and this works out fabulously for me!!!

However, there are always going to be men that really do not like weight on a woman and that is their preference.

Every single person is different. Some like curves, some like bones, some just don't like women at all!!

I have never had a problem with my weight and never had a problem getting a man, I think it depends a lot on personality, compatibility and taste, but yes, in my oppinion, men can, and do like a curve or ten on women, who can look just as sexy overweight as they can as a waif!

:) xx

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A male reader, Honest Answer United States +, writes (23 May 2010):

Honest Answer agony auntThere are men that prefer overweight women. Beleive it or not, there are even riskque magazines that cater to men who like overweight women. In some cultures, overweight women are cherished while skinny women are frowned upon.

This is a big planet with a variety of people with a variety of likes and dislikes. Some men like big boobs, while other prefer small. Some men like redheads, and others prefer blondes. And so on.

Good Luck!

Jeff

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A reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2010):

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Big-Beautiful-Women-Claim-Your-Beauty/291071697186?ref=ts .... need I say more xxx

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