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I am afraid a guy I met online will tell all and the life I have built will crumble
Q. Hey everyone heres my problem . i started at a different college for the second time . quite quicky i was put on the rugby team . for many years i had / still am unsure about who i am - seeing as so many people have played cruel mind games...
A. 27 October 2010:
This guy you met sounds like he might be bipolar or worse. He probably needs professional help, especially if he's talking about hurting himself.
In any case it sounds like you've pretty much cut him out of your life as best you can. You ju... (read in full...)
I'm gay, he's 'straight'? I'm absolutely in love with him and don't know what to do...
Q. Wow, Ok. I'm 22 and openly gay, and so I have this friend. We met a couple months ago at a party and I immediately had an attraction towards him. He's adorable, funny, sweet, kind and "straight" supposedly. Everyone thinks he is gay or ...
A. 27 October 2010: Well... for one. He didn't 'used to be' bi. He IS bi... but as he's stated he's more into girls. His bi-ness comes out when he's drunk - as you've pointed out. That's probably why you're so confused. He IS taking advantage of the crush you have ... (read in full...)
Should I tell my partner at school I'm gay?
Q. Hi, I'm 15 years old and have a crush on a guy, and I'm gay, but no one knows. (except you of course) I just recently switched classes, and I'm in the same class as him(the guy I have a crush on) ... and for better or for worse, we're partners. We ...
A. 27 October 2010: As a rule, you should only come out to someone whom you TOTALLY trust. That kind of trust only comes with years of friendship.
So, If you don't know he feels about others being gay then I wouldn't say anything to him - otherwise your worst ni... (read in full...)
Should I have gay sex with my best friend he is asking help me!!!!!!!
Q. i'm 15 and i know i'm bi but i've told a few people at my school and they told everyone now i'm getting teased but now that everyone knows a lot more gay and bi people ane coming out but now i keep getting asked by a mate of mine who is gay foe gay ...
A. 26 October 2010: As everyone has said... you really should only be having sex with someone you care about.
If you are hesitant to do so now... you need to evaluate WHY and resolve that issue or just tell your friend you don't feel comfortable in doing it with him... (read in full...)
Still single after a year and wondering what could be wrong with me?
Q. I am at the point where I really don't understand what's wrong with me. I am too young to be so depressed and too old to be desperate over such childish things. Being gay isn't easy but this is just ridiculous. I am going crazy over the fact tha...
A. 26 October 2010: When I was around 24 I went through something similar. I was just coming out (to myself) and found it really hard to essentially attract people. All of my straight friends then started getting married and I started thinking... OMG! What's wrong ... (read in full...)
My best friend is only using me till he gets a girlfriend
Q. I have been blowing my best friend since I was 16. Now I am 25. I’m gay, but my best friend is not. He really is straight. He will mostly watch straight or lesbo porn when I blow him. he let me do it because he’s ugly and he doesn’t have a ...
A. 22 October 2010: Wow... this is a pretty messed up situation. First, you really shouldn't have told anyone else about the 'services' you've been rendering... but now that you have the cat's out of the bag... so to speak. All you can do now, is talk to your gay ... (read in full...)
I'm attracted to other guys but I don't want a relationship with one
Q. So, I'm now 16, and I realize I am attracted to other guys. But, I don't want to have a relationship with one. As for girls, I now am starting to get less turned on by them, and yet, I still do like girls too want a relationship with girls. Am I ...
A. 19 October 2010: I was the same way... at your age. Emotionally... I liked girls, physically I got turned on by guys. It'll work itself out. Don't rush yourself and don't limit yourself (physically or emotionally).... (read in full...)
I'm an in-the-closet gay guy, and I really like this guy I work with.
Q. Ok, so I've asked a couple people I know about this, but I want to get an outside opinion. I'm an in-the-closet gay guy, and I really like this guy I work with. Sometimes I think that he might like me back, but I feel like its just me seeing what I ...
A. 19 October 2010: Blonde30s nailed it. He's probably Bi or gay. Only you can tell, by observation, whether he's 'workin' it or being a 'player'.
If anything, ask him if he wants to get lunch some time. You can then get to know him over lunch(es). Then you can ... (read in full...)
How can I turn my straight friend bi?
Q. Im bi and I have a friend who is straight but gives me sum gayish hints of bi-curiousness and i want to turn him bi...or just want to have sex/play around with him im a new friend of his ive known him for about a month and a half now and we hang ...
A. 19 October 2010: You can't "turn" anyone gay, bi, straight or anything in between. Like you, they either ARE or ARE NOT.
If he hints at maybe being bi-curious or something then that might be true... but... you've only known the person for a VERY SHORT time. I... (read in full...)
How do I make my move with him without coming too desperate?
Q. Hey there, I am gay and I am attending a community college and in a public speaking class there's this guy that both intrigues me and I am convinced he's gay. I can't explain but just like other gay men, there's just a certain feeling you get when ...
A. 19 October 2010: Well... if you're BOTH in the same class... you already have something in common. Ask him if he wants to study together or if he can 'help' you on some assignment (even if you don't really 'need' the help).
Once you are then together you can then... (read in full...)
I can't take this any more... I'm SO confused!
Q. hey guys and girls i am 16 years old and like every other guy my age, i am a lil.... how do u say?... freakin out!!! ok here's the deal i am so confused about my sexual orientation.... it started when i started wanting guys when i was 13 then when ...
A. 10 October 2010: Don't worry kiddo. It happens to EVERYONE. Most of it's hormones. Gay, Straight, Bi, whatever. We find someone attractive - either physically, emotionally, or both and we develop crushes &/or fall in love with the person. I'm gay but I was ... (read in full...)
Is it sexual harrassment if family members or relatives falsely accuse you of being gay?
Q. I don't come from a good family but I do have some values. And I take offence when family members or relatives repeatedly ask me if I'm gay when I have already told them I'm not. Is this sexual harrassment? Sometimes, they say it as a joke, but I...
A. 7 October 2010: Heartfullalove pretty much says it all... It's only sexual harassment if they have some sort of control over you in a work relationship. E.g. if you work in some family business. It also depends on state laws. But... for the most part... just ... (read in full...)
Ideas on how to approach a stranger to start a friendhship?
Q. Hello Agony Aunts/Uncles/And everyone else, I am painfully shy, and I am already 21. I have only been in one relationship and that was with a girl, the problem with that is that I am gay. And so in that relationship back in the day there was no c...
A. 7 October 2010: If you can think of something that you two have in common, say the assignment from class, or some activity (sports, theatre, shop class, gym class... it can be anything)... you can always walk up and ask or comment about the common ... (read in full...)
I'm afraid my girlfriend will find out I'm bisexual! I never told her!
Q. So I've been with my girl friend for a year. Everything with me and her is pretty good. I really love her. However, my ex has recently been coming around trying to get me back. The problem is, my ex is a guy and I never told my girl friend that I'm ...
A. 6 October 2010: Well... only YOU know for sure whether she'll accept your bisexuality or not. If she doesn't then you really only have two options... lie to her... or break up. It also sounds like you might still be attracted to or even want to be with your ex. ... (read in full...)
I really want to overcome my secret affair with my male cousin now I am going to get married
Q. oK my problem, im in my mid 20"s. growing up was Pretty hard my parents all ways working you same old story, but my problem is that all my life ive been stuck in a limbo of sick mental mind games. that i find really hard to overcome and people and ...
A. 6 October 2010: Um... it sounds to me like you are more bi/gay than you are willing to accept. Especially since you feel so guilty about this, you are keeping a secret, and the fact that you crave it so much.
You're NOT going to like what I've got to say but ... (read in full...)
HELP! I LIED AND NOW I NEED HELP!
Q. Okay so long story: Me and girlfriend broke up quite messily in February. I was devastated and begged her to get back but she wouldnt. I knew she still loved me alot at the time so I told her I was seeing another girl (when in fact I was...
A. 3 October 2010: Have you heard the phrase 'My what tangled webs we weave when once we practice to deceive.' ???
Sounds to me like you're not a very good lier... so as the first poster said... you just need to fess up. Tell her you wanted he back so bad that... (read in full...)
How do I know if he's gay?
Q. Hi, I'm a boy of 17 and I'm in my last year of high school and I think I love a boy in my class.. It's my first time I love a boy.. and how do I know if he's gay or not? It's not like we're real friends or something, he is just in the sam...
A. 2 October 2010: Well... the only way to find out... is to become friends. You have to find some way to interact with him on common grounds, so to speak, at first... and then once you're friends then you can be around him in a more 1 on 1 setting. Are you in any ... (read in full...)
Gay in Denial..
Q. I have a serious obsession, it's with a guy, who I hang round with an awful lot. I am completely out as gay, and although he says he is not gay, there are so many factors that make us know he is not telling the truth. As wrong as it may be, I once ...
A. 30 September 2010: Well... you certainly can't FORCE anyone to come out, or even to accept their sexuality. It sounds like he may already be in the self-acceptance phase. However, there are MANY MANY factors - all personal - which either allow each one of us to come ... (read in full...)
How can I get my mind off of my male teacher?
Q. I'm 13, and my band director is male, and is married to a woman. He looks to bein his 40's, and just had I child. I've had a crush on him for a few years, and I know I'll never get a shot, because it's illegal, and he isn't gay, but ... What can I ...
A. 30 September 2010: We all have crushes on our teachers, coaches, etc... It just happens. Mainly because we project onto them what we think they are like or what we want them to be.
I know it's hard to believe but you'll eventually get over it... most likely w... (read in full...)
Does he like me or am I freaking him out?
Q. Hey. I dont know what to do. Im bisexual and theres this guy at school in the year below me who is absolutely gorgeous!!! unbelievably stunning! Well there are loads of times where i see him looking at me. Now i would want nothing more than to ...
A. 29 September 2010: Are there any classes or sports that you have together??? Choir, Shop, Football, Track, Golf, etc?
The only way that you're gonna find out for sure... is to become friends with him... somehow... and the only way that you do that... is if you m... (read in full...)
How to know if you're gay, bi, bi-curious, confused or straight?
Q. Hi I'm a 21 years old male I'm here for help with some issues that I'm trying to deal with but don't know so please take your time to read my story and help me or give me some advice. This is me, a straight male who had never been or slept ...
A. 29 September 2010: I THINK that you might be bisexual, at least, even though you currently don't want to have any real sexual relations with him, other than fondling him, my guess is that if he reciprocated it would lead to other activities eventually culminat... (read in full...)
Obsessed with my best friend - need some help
Q. Hi there, I'm new to the forum so not sure whether this is the right place. Hope so! I'm currently a student and feeling pretty low at the moment. I'm a 19yr guy and bisexual. Even though I feel "safe" behind a computer screen it feels hard to ev...
A. 28 September 2010: OMG! I was in your exact situation when I was your age. I was devastated when my bf actually had a crush on a girl. It was even worse when he eventually got married (not to his crush but a different girl) - though I eventually adjusted to that. ... (read in full...)
I think he's flirting with me, should I look for more signs?
Q. Hey, I got a question that involves my friend. Im bi (but no one knows lol) and his straight. Im not sure if this is all in my head but im starting to think that his flirting with me a little bit. He keeps touching me, and, like, keeps hinting ...
A. 24 September 2010: Keep your eyes/ears, etc open for more signs... and possibly flirt back a little. Sounds like your friend might me a little LESS straight than you think he is.... (read in full...)
I am gay but about to marry a woman, does anyone have any advice on how to make my marriage work?
Q. hi, im jay 28 yrs old gay and dont have any feeling for girls. but i have too marry a girl very soon, i have already stopped my gay activities and want to live like other married couples and i have heared that many gays are married and have kids ...
A. 23 September 2010: If she is NOT fully aware that you are gay... then you should NOT marry her. You should only marry someone when you can tell them EVERYTHING. If you haven't told her... then you are withholding a 'secret' from her... that will only come out... one ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's ashamed of me!
Q. I am a gay guy and have been going out with my boyfriend for 7 months ago. I am out to friends and family, and my boyfriend isn't. I am really falling for this guy and he has met my friends and family, but I am finding it really hard because he is ...
A. 23 September 2010:
Well... you can't FORCE anyone to come out - short of outing them yourself... which you DON'T wanna do!
There's LOTS of reasons for not coming out... and almost as many for it.
Personal happiness is the most compelling... so if ... (read in full...)
I really like him, how can I find out if he is gay?
Q. I really like this one guy but I am not sure he is gay? Can anyone give me good advice on what to look for?...
A. 23 September 2010:
Eye contact is almost a dead give away. Does he make a lot of eye contact - almost stares at you when you're talking. Does he 'light up' when you enter the room or when he notices you (or someone else for that matter). How does he react to inva... (read in full...)
Does this "straight" guy like me?
Q. Well here's the dilemma, im a bi male who has never been with a guy before... to make a long story short I have a straight guy friend that I think wants me but claims to be straight. When we are together its like we are a couple or something, he ...
A. 20 September 2010:
Sounds like HE might be a little bi-courious himself... and he likes you.
If you truly wanna find out how he feels about you... let him get you a little drunk... and then put the moves on him. If he shys away or is repulsed by it or rejects y... (read in full...)
My friend thinks he is gay! how can I help?
Q. My friend (14) is afraid he's gay, when he's just bicurious i am a little and want to help how can i(15)?...
A. 19 September 2010: One of the biggest problems about coming to the realization that you ARE gay, if indeed he is, is that OTHERS will not accept you for who you are. This is especially true of PARENTS as they are the one who we're most bonded to... and whose ex... (read in full...)
I don't think I can offer him much I'm very new to love
Q. Hi there Aunties/Uncles! So I am a Gay 20 year old male. And well I have never been in a relationship, better yet like the movie aptly titled---I have never been kissed. The people I tend to fall for, just never work out. So a while back I tried a ...
A. 14 September 2010:
You know what... this is really simple.
Just send him a message (not on his FB Wall - but a private message)... asking him if he really is now single and if he'd be interested in dating.
If he says no, then perhaps he didn't/doesn't think... (read in full...)
Why do I like having sex with him when I find girls attractive?
Q. I have a friend who visits me weekly and we kiss, suck each other and had sex. I find girls attractive, not guys, but i love having sex with him? Am i gay or bi?...
A. 14 September 2010: I am GAY and I find some women just drop dead gorgeous. I don't want to have sex with them... but they are beautiful none the less. My guess is... you're bisexual. At you age though, I would have thought that you would have discovered this LONG ... (read in full...)
I need his financial help but we just broke up!
Q. My boyfriend just broke up with me. Before this, he promised to help me with part of my rent while i add the rest because of situation. Now we are broken up, I don't know if it's wise to still collect part of the money from him or don't. Would that ...
A. 10 September 2010:
If you don't feel right about accepting the money... outright... then workout a LOAN. Draw up papers stating how long he will help you and then how long it will take you to pay him back and any interest. Obviously you'll need to figure out HOW ... (read in full...)
I liked these new friends and then found out they were just playing with me!
Q. I'm a gay man and always have been, when I was in high school I got so badly bullied because of it and got no friends from high school at all. I started working for a company and met this girl, I go out a lot with this girl and she introduced me to ...
A. 31 August 2010: I hate to be harsh... but this is pretty much how it operates... on both sides of the fence (so to speak). You just have to keep shopping around... until you find friends and/or boy friend(s) that are a match.
I know it's hard. Especial... (read in full...)
She sees her guy friends more than she sees me
Q. My girlfreind is constantly putting me second best to her male and female freinds. she seems to think that i try and make her sit at home all day everyday whilst i work, but this isnt true. i dont mind her seeing her female freinds whenever she ...
A. 31 August 2010: This sounds to me like you're her comfortable couch to come back to. It could be that she's 'sampling' what's out there... trying to find a replacement herself but keeps coming back to you when she finds you are better than what's available.
... (read in full...)
How can I tell my dad I want to play football
Q. Am 13 years old boy and am ganna be 14 in 4 months, my name is Anderson and i want to become a footballer, how can tell my dad and how can i do it when i finish school thanks for your help....
A. 30 August 2010: Why is this so difficult?!?! Most fathers WANT their boys to grow up and be into sports and all. Really... I don't understand why you're having problems with this.
... (read in full...)
Is this wrong doing this? and I'm worried how my parents will act
Q. hi i need help m boyfriend is comeing over from the uk tomorrow and i am worried as my perants dont know a lot about him i want them to meet him and fall in love with him as much as i do as hes comeing from the uk to the us the only one who knows ...
A. 29 August 2010: So it sounds like you're already OUT to your parents. It sounds like it's just gonna take some time for them to adjust to it. You need to work on them about the whole 'why you're gay' issue. They need to be made aware that HE didn't turn you ... (read in full...)
Should I consider marriage to a woman if I'm probably gay?
Q. Hi I am a 23 year old guy and most probably gay. I am predominately attracted physically to men (like 90 %) with the rest for feelings for women :s I have not come out yet, and live in an indian, religous household where being gay is for...
A. 29 August 2010:
Many churches now days are telling their congregations to accept their gay members and are telling the women to be supportive etc. Some MOMs (Mixed Orientation Marriages; one of the partners is gay/lesbian and the other is straight) work. BUT.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's family wont accept me because they cannot accept their son is gay, should I leave him alone even though we want to be together?
Q. my boyfriend is having trouble with his parents accpeting the fact that he likes guys.... i know that they dont like me for that reason and might attempt to get me into trouble about this should i leave him alone even thought we really want to be ...
A. 28 August 2010: Your question doesn't state his age. Yours is implied by the id of the questioner.
If he's under 18, and you are not... then you're both just going to have to wait until he IS 18. Otherwise... his parents COULD cause you some serious problems... (read in full...)
I want to be with my male cousin again but he said he doesn't want to do it again, how can I make him more comfortable?
Q. hey guys, I am 17 yo old and Bi-curious. A while ago my cousin and I masturbated together and this included doing it for each other. I thought it was great and at the time he enjoyed himself too. However, it has been some time since we did thi...
A. 28 August 2010: Sorry kiddo... you're gonna have to find someone else to play around with. I'm sure there are plenty of other guys around. You can't FORCE someone to do it... and pestering them will most likely just backfire and he'll end up outting you to the ... (read in full...)
Its killing me not to be able to tell him how I feel
Q. I know you probably get a lot of questions like this on here, so I regret to tell you that this is another one of them. I apologize if this seems a little long winded, but I need to get this all off my chest and I've always thought that it's ...
A. 23 August 2010: Sounds like HE is as confused about it as you. HE wants to tell you/be with you but he doesn't know if you like him and what not. I would say, in this case, just come out to him... tell him you are bi/gay, that you really like all the physical ... (read in full...)
I messed up with my friend this weekend! What should I say to him?
Q. i can't beleive this weekend and how badly i messed up. i'm 16, male, and wondered in the past if i might be bi or gay although i've dated girls. my parents were out of town so i asked a friend if he wanted to stay over and party with me. he's my ...
A. 23 August 2010: If your friend texted you and wants to talk... then... go talk to him. I'll bet he probably feels as weird about it as you do.
You first time with another guys is ALWAYS weird/terrifying. I wouldn't go blurting out how your feeling have increase... (read in full...)
Is there any chance my straight best friend will fall for me, a teen gay?
Q. I know this question has been asked by many a gay guy, but i was hoping for a more specific answer. My friendship with this guy started rather oddly (he is the same age as me and we have actually been at school together for the past 5 years). He was ...
A. 22 August 2010: OK... Here's the scoop. You have a REALLY REALLY REALLY GOOD _BEST_ FRIEND. He's told you that he knows everything and STILL hangs out with you and sort of encourages you to crush on him. That part's a little unhealthy - for you mainly - but at ... (read in full...)
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