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... Send *vgGuy1 a private message | | | *vgGuy1's profile:Just yer average guy next door type... that lives near San Francisco... and yes I happen to be gay.
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I'm crazy about him but not sure if he's gay
Q. I'm a 17 Year old male and I am bi. I am absolutely crazy for my best friends younger brother, who is 14. This may sound creepy, but he's not a typical 14 year old, much more mature than average. I have known him for a while and have just gotten ...
A. 23 January 2011: I hate to say this but getting involved with someone that is much younger than you especially as you're approaching 18 only means total heartbreak.
I was TOTALLY in LOVE with someone when I graduated from high school... and then moved away to ... (read in full...)
I have a crush on my same sex friend!
Q. About 2 and a half years ago when i was 13 (now 15and a half) i was thinking about a boy from school who at the time annoyed me, then i just had a thought of him kissing me and i had a wonderful feeling inside and at first i denied it, however as ...
A. 21 January 2011: What kind of advice would you like??? If you'd like to have more than a friendly relationship with your friend, you first must determine whether he's bi/gay or not. You're BOTH very young and HE might not know himself which he prefers - given that... (read in full...)
I'm wondering if I could be gay?
Q. i'm a male in my twenties and i'm confused about my sexuality, i think i might be gay. i started being confused about it within the past 2 years but before that i was sure i was straight but since then i have had dreams of being with another man and ...
A. 19 January 2011: See my response(s) to an almost identical question: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-get-aroused-only-by-guys-i-have.html ... (read in full...)
Crush trouble.....
Q. Okay heres how it goes.I am a fifteen year old gay guy and i have a crush on a fellow guy who goes to school with me and i am more than sure that he is gay.Well he is really shy,and all and he easily blushes around hot guys.So no doubt there.But the ...
A. 19 January 2011: Just from your short description... it sounds like he DOES like you. Given his shyness YOU are the one who's going to have to make the first move.
See if he wants to go see a movie with you... just you and him.
If that's a little too direc... (read in full...)
I get aroused only by guys. I have come to doubt my sexual orientation.
Q. Hi all, Well, I'll try to keep this as brief as possible. I am a 20, almost 21, year old college student. Lately, I've been plagued with doubts about my own sexual orientation. You see, I have no problem with appreciating a woman, but I myse...
A. 19 January 2011: I'm one of those that sort of 'knew' when I was young (like from 8-10) that I liked boys more than girls but forgot about until about high school when I really started finding guys more visually (and hence sexually) attractive than girls - although ... (read in full...)
She's lied and I don't know how to express my hurt properly
Q. Hey people, I need some advice I recently had a conversation with my girlfriend about this guy she was talking to while we were broken up last april. We have been back together for nearly a year now and this guy is persistent but my girlfrie...
A. 19 January 2011: Oooh... Your snooping... although probably justified... can get you in trouble with the law! Google: arrested for reading email
In short a HUSBAND read his WIFES email for what seems to be justifiable reasons, yet the law (a state law in this ... (read in full...)
He wants me to help him come out of the closet, how do I do this?
Q. Hi everyone! I finally got a boyfriend and am SO HAPPY! I have a question however. He is slowly coming out to his friends. I mean VERY SLOWLY. He is not out to his parents yet and his parents don't even know that I'm gay. I am not at all...
A. 14 January 2011: As he has already spoken to SOME of his friends... I'm sure he told them... 'Please don't tell anyone else'. You COULD tell him to go back and talk to those he's already told... and have them 'leak' the word out to others... slowly... but only when ... (read in full...)
I get aroused only by guys. I have come to doubt my sexual orientation.
Q. Hi all, Well, I'll try to keep this as brief as possible. I am a 20, almost 21, year old college student. Lately, I've been plagued with doubts about my own sexual orientation. You see, I have no problem with appreciating a woman, but I myse...
A. 14 January 2011: This question gets asked so often on here... that it's gotta be the most talked about subject.
It differs for each individual... but... for the most part If you are attracted sexually ONLY to guys... then you are gay. If you are attracte... (read in full...)
How do we guard against an ex scorned?
Q. Hi ya aunties and uncles----I'm at a cross roads. Over 20 years ago, I married my childhood sweetheart, and together we have children, one of whom is now in Heaven. For years I have been miserable in the marriage but stayed for the sake...
A. 11 January 2011: I'm a little confused. Are you living with "R" and seeing "W" or living with "W" and not wanting "R" to find out because you used to date her.
I would say, if at all possible, that you should find a job at a different company... that and just com... (read in full...)
I want to become closer friends first before a relationship!
Q. So i recenetly told the love of my life i like him and he said he likes me too. Were both in the closet (its a secret kinda relationship) almost all my wishes came true when he said he liked me but we dont talk that much. We don't really go out ...
A. 11 January 2011: Well... if you want to be closer/better friends... you gotta make it happen. Hang out with him and his friends... or invite him to hang out with you and your friends. Ask him if he wants to study together - even if you're not in the same class(es) ... (read in full...)
Aren't I a bit old to be questioning my orientation?
Q. Hey there, Been reading here for a while and I feel you could really help me out here. Well, I'm 19 and I've been feeling well different to my 'usual' self now for about 6 months now. I know what your all thinking, 'your 19, you should know by n...
A. 11 January 2011: I accepted the fact, acknowledged it to myself, that I was gay... at just your age... and spent about a month almost constantly in tears cause it's what society tells us... that being gay is 'wrong', 'an abomination', etc.
You might be 'bi' but... (read in full...)
He won't date me until I turn 18 and is now dating someone else!
Q. Okay, so this is really complicated(then again what relationship doesn't have it's complications?). Six months before I met this guy(I'm a gay guy, by the way), I had a dream about some guy of a significant age difference. We loved each other so ...
A. 11 January 2011: Your subconscience, via your dream, was telling you it was 'wrong' anyway.
As Danielepew points out... he really CAN'T date you until you're older. I'm surprised that he, and to a lessor degree you, let it get so emotionally entangled when you... (read in full...)
I don't want to feel like I'm a sugardaddy!
Q. Where to begin. Well, I'm a 21 year old gay male who in August moved 1,000 miles away from home to attend graduate school in another part of the country. Moving here was a big challenge not knowing anybody, and another gay graduate student suggested ...
A. 11 January 2011: Wow. That totally sucks! He's probably 'working' several guys at the same time too. What a scumbag.... (read in full...)
I don't want to feel like I'm a sugardaddy!
Q. Where to begin. Well, I'm a 21 year old gay male who in August moved 1,000 miles away from home to attend graduate school in another part of the country. Moving here was a big challenge not knowing anybody, and another gay graduate student suggested ...
A. 8 January 2011: Do you due diligence. You could be getting 'played'. I'm one of those overly trusting types... and I got taken, in almost this identical manner. There are sites out there that will run information/background checks for you (for a fee ... (read in full...)
Can watching straight-porn keep me from going gay?
Q. hi i am a straight 17 year old and i havent lost my virginity, i masturbate over straight sex and porn but i have doubts about my sexuality, if i continue to masturbate over this porn can it prevent me from becoming gay in the future?...
A. 6 January 2011:
At some point... EVERY bi/gay person wishes this were the case... but NO. Straight porn doesn't make you straight any more than gay porn makes you gay.
Your sexuality is just something that you have to figure out. It sounds to me, since you're w... (read in full...)
Coming out is difficult?
Q. I'm gay. I've known I was gay or as long as I can remember. However, I'm afraid to come out. I'm a Junior in High School, and I know i'm not ready. But I find that coming out will be especially hard for me as my brother is also gay, and he is out. ...
A. 6 January 2011: DerZyniker & SnowStorm have the best suggestions. Talk to your brother first! Essentially he should be the first person you tell. He knows the family dynamics - which are always the hardest to deal with. Once you've come out to him. After that ... (read in full...)
Is this younger guy at school crushing on me?
Q. Hi... straight to the point... there is a guy in school... he is 14 and i am 17 (and gay)... basically as its a small school I have become familiar with most of the faces and being gay I watch all most of the guys in particular. I don't know what to ...
A. 6 January 2011: Well... do you like HIM?!?! If he seems interested/listening to what you're saying/talking about... engage him in conversation. Eventually you'll figure out whether he's gay and/or crushing on your... or not.... (read in full...)
In love with my straight best friend.
Q. So I am extremely confused... I have been best friends with this guy for about 10 years. We do just about everthing together and we both really value the time we spend together. We are also currently room mates... We have become extremely close an...
A. 21 December 2010: Given what you wrote in your response... I would say that your friend is at LEAST bi... if not fully gay. Remember, coming out is an extremely difficult process. It sounds like he hasn't even accepted the fact himself - let alone being able to ... (read in full...)
The men I fancy tend to be straight and very rarely gay - why?
Q. I would like to have your opinion on the fact that the men I fancy tend to be straight and very raerly gay and what does it say that I am into men from the age of 16 right up to the age of 79? Your views are welcome!...
A. 21 December 2010: It sounds to me like you tend to go for what you perceive to be more masculine or 'hyper' masculine (the Tom's of Finland type - google it if you don't know what I'm talking about). So, that being said - you need to find a gay bar that essentially ... (read in full...)
In love with my straight best friend.
Q. So I am extremely confused... I have been best friends with this guy for about 10 years. We do just about everthing together and we both really value the time we spend together. We are also currently room mates... We have become extremely close an...
A. 20 December 2010: Boonridge has nailed it pretty fairly on the head of the nail.
Your friend... MIGHT be bi, but it doesn't sound like he's interested in having a physical relationship with you... other than the usual platonic hugging kind of thing that lots of ... (read in full...)
Is it a good idea for me to tell him about my feelings?
Q. I am a senior in high school; I just transferred to a new school for their fine arts program. I recently came out as pansexual to most of my friends at school. Through some friends, I met a very cute guy. We have gotten to know each other very wel...
A. 20 December 2010: It sounds to me... like these two friends of yours... that you're talking about... might just be a little involved (with each other). They're probably trying to be discreet about it possibly so as not to hurt your feelings (since SHE knows how you ... (read in full...)
I've finally stopped denying that I am gay, but I have zero experience with men!
Q. Hey guys/gals, So I have a bit of a problem; I've basically lived my entire life in sexual self-denial. I've been with girls, had girlfriends, I've been told I'm good looking, etc ... but I'm gay. I can't deny it any longer and the thought of b...
A. 9 December 2010: Dude,
I'm not 47. I didn't have any physical experience with another guy until I was like 24 - as well... other than a little touchy-touchy when I was in high school.
You've gotten past the acceptance phase - that of recognizing that... (read in full...)
I feel awkward and never know what to say to people!
Q. When im with people, I NEVER know what to say. And it always turns into this big long awkardness, untill either of us cant wait to get away from each other. I know its not just me, because the people who im awkward around are just fine with other ...
A. 30 November 2010: The key to good conversation is not so much what you SAY... as how you LISTEN. As stated before... get people to talk about themselves... but interject your opinion/information as appropriate as well. Things like:
What kind of music do you l... (read in full...)
How do I propose a secret "friends-with-benefits" relationship to a closeted bisexual guy?
Q. Hi, I've got a slight situation. Its quite simple to sum up really... I am a gay guy in my teens at sixth form college. There is another guy who has told me he is bi but he isn't out to anyone else. There are others who suspect he is bi but I don't ...
A. 30 November 2010: You say you know that he "doesn't fancy" you... and yet you're think about discreet FwBs?
I don't think it would really work very well. A discreet FwB relationship requires an EXTREME amount of trust - on his part - and if he doesn't fancy yo... (read in full...)
Is he worth pursuing???
Q. Ahhhhh! Hey guys, well ill dive into it, i told one off my friends who is/was bi-curious that i was gay and that i had feelings for him. It was fine last week everything was A-OKay! I said to him, Erm well i think your really cute and your really ...
A. 30 November 2010: Well... for one... you're both very young. YOU may have already figured out that you are bi/gay... but he might still be working on the whole big/gay/straight thing.
He PROBABLY said nice things to keep from hurting your feelings... this doe... (read in full...)
13, pregnant and don't know what to do...
Q. hi I'm 13 and pregnant, I'm scared, dunno what to do and not sure who the dad is! Only my best friend knows, not sure what to do... its been 2 months now I'm scared HELPPPP...
A. 27 November 2010:
You're probably NOT going to like this... but The only real thing that you can/should do... is talk to your parents. Even if they get VERY upset they are the only ones who are actually in a position to be able to help you.
Good Luck.... (read in full...)
My gf wants me to have a bigger penis, how do I handle this??
Q. I've got a question recently me and my gf had a talk about my penis and she says that she wants it thicker I asked her why and she said why not. I know that all those pills are scams aswell as mentioned exercises but is there any way to make it ...
A. 26 November 2010:
Tell HER she needs to grow bigger breasts, or a tighter vagina... and see what happens. Truth is... she can't... just like you can't grow a longer/thicker penis... it's basically physically impossible. Even using a penis pump doesn't do it. ... (read in full...)
I got my mind set on you!
Q. Hey. I have such a big problem and its really getting to me :( I am totally head over heels for this guy at my school. He is STUNNING!! He's in the year below me...but thats not the thing which bothers me. I see him looking at me ALL THE TIME!!...
A. 22 November 2010:
Her just MIGHT like you.
Do you have ANYTHING mutually in common (classes, clubs sports)??? If so ask him if he wants to study or go to some common event that you have in common.
When he looks at you. Wink/Smile at him - ever so slightly. ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to not have a girlfriend at the age of 16?
Q. I am 16 years old and I don't have a girlfriend, yet. I've never had girlfriend before in my entire life. People (primarily my peers) have told me that not having a girlfriend at my age is sad and pathetic. I remember one guy on my football would ...
A. 19 November 2010: Wow! Your parents SUCK! They might THINK that they are trying to 'toughen' you up or something... but it's totally wrong! Now, as for the girlfriend, don't worry about it. You shouldn't get into a relationship just to 'have' a girl friend. A... (read in full...)
Seeking a partner?
Q. I'm a gay 14 year old with no relationship experience what so ever (except a silly bf gf thing in elementary school) I recently moved and I know not one person around. I'm also homeschooled which makes matters worse. Ive tried to be patient but its ...
A. 19 November 2010: The whole home-schooling thing REALLY puts a damper on things. Are you able to get out and meet ANY other kids? That's the key to meeting up with someone and eventually becoming boyfriends with someone. There MIGHT be a GLBT club or something at ... (read in full...)
I'm afraid if I act on my emotions I will lose him completely
Q. I'm a 16yo boy who is bisexual and seriously in love with a friend. The thing is i dont know what to do, i want to act on my emotions but am afraid that if i do i will lose him completely. We're so alike which leads me to think he might not be str...
A. 19 November 2010: Well... only you really truly KNOW your friend so it's really hard for us to say... yes go ahead and come-out/tell him you love him.
How has he acted towards you in the past? Are you both, already, physically touchy (hugs, long stares, etc.) H... (read in full...)
It seems like everywhere we go we run into someone he's slept with
Q. I have always known that my partner has had many partners and has much much more experience than me. He lost his virginity at 11 and has had several partners and has slept with teachers and professors. it is starting to get to me because ev...
A. 17 November 2010: Well... you could always just assume that he's sad sex with EVERYONE you meet... but I'm sure that doesn't help your issues.
My advise is get over your jealousy issues, cause there's nothing you can do about who he has ALREADY had sex with - r... (read in full...)
Where do I go from here, its got the point where I literally cannot concentrate on work anymore!
Q. Help, I'm sinking in lust and love and I'm going bananas!!! I've fancied this guy at work from the moment he started last year; it has taken a while but we have gradually begun to talk more, stare at each other constantly and flirt outrageously! ...
A. 12 November 2010: Oooo... you COULD be putting yourself and/or the company that you work for in extreme jeopardy here.
Especially when it comes time to do evaluations/raises. If you continue on with this flirting he could use it against you either way. He could... (read in full...)
My boyfriend never comes near my penis!
Q. Hi everyone. I've posted a few questions on here before. I'm still struggling with my relationship. To give you a bit of background, I'm a 23-year-old gay guy who has been in a relationship with a 53-year-old guy (huge age gap, I know!) for ...
A. 4 November 2010:
You either work it out with him that you can have physical relations with someone else who WILL get you off... or you leave him.
... (read in full...)
Does being on birth control make me a slut?
Q. I am 14 years old and i am on birth control without a bf does that make me a slut or a whore or anything on thoes means ???? ...
A. 31 October 2010: Using Birth Control Being a Slut.
You're only a slut if you sleep around [have multiple sexual partners] and don't really care about them. And you SHOULDN'T be having sex (often) just because you ARE on birth control and think you can do anyth... (read in full...)
Opinions on the minimum and maximum ages to date.
Q. I'm a 16, and curious as to your opinion as to what the minimum and maximum age to date would be and why....
A. 31 October 2010: It varies according to YOUR actual age. Most parents don't let kids start dating UNTIL they are 16... so you're pretty much stuck with a pool from 16-17/18. I would advise against dating anyone YOUNGER than 14 or OLDER than 18. Once you turn 18,... (read in full...)
Could he be gay/bi? And what do I do now?
Q. I am 16 and a sophmore in highschool. I am a bi guy. Nobody knows that I am bi. I have a huge crush on this guy. He doesnt know im bi, and I'm not sure if he is gay or bi. He takes every chance he has to hug me, and he said that I was cute. In our ...
A. 31 October 2010: I THINK you got your answer... without even asking. YOU now need to show some affection back.... (read in full...)
Could he be gay/bi? And what do I do now?
Q. I am 16 and a sophmore in highschool. I am a bi guy. Nobody knows that I am bi. I have a huge crush on this guy. He doesnt know im bi, and I'm not sure if he is gay or bi. He takes every chance he has to hug me, and he said that I was cute. In our ...
A. 29 October 2010: If he's touching you, smiling at you, staring at you and making fairly open suggestions to you... he's more thank likely really into you. At the very least he's Bi... like you... if not entirely gay.
Since you didn't really reciproc... (read in full...)
We broke up, but now she is cheating on new b/f with me!
Q. Ok ill start off by saying that i dated my ex for 2 and a half years and we were friends for like 6 months before that. We took everything slow and we fell in love with each other. we had some problems at the end and she started ignoring me and ...
A. 28 October 2010: Everyone else has pretty much said it...
You're being played, so to speak. She wants to have her cake and eat it too... and she's trying to decide which side of the fence is greener.
You need to break it off... and move on. Permanently.... (read in full...)
If I get turned on by men and women, what am I?
Q. Ok, My story is kinda confusing so please bare with me... I've known i was gay since about 4th grade when i had a crush on a boy. then from 6th to 8th grade i had a strong crush on a different boy, also during this time period i started to no...
A. 27 October 2010:
I'm TOTALLY gay. But when I was your age... I could get turned on by Bi-porn real easily. I was more intrigued by the guy(s) in it... than the women. I would GUESS you are probably going through something similar.
Don't sweat it. You probabl... (read in full...)
I am afraid a guy I met online will tell all and the life I have built will crumble
Q. Hey everyone heres my problem . i started at a different college for the second time . quite quicky i was put on the rugby team . for many years i had / still am unsure about who i am - seeing as so many people have played cruel mind games...
A. 27 October 2010:
This guy you met sounds like he might be bipolar or worse. He probably needs professional help, especially if he's talking about hurting himself.
In any case it sounds like you've pretty much cut him out of your life as best you can. You ju... (read in full...)
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