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Nothing has been said since I reminded her of her sexual past, should I bring it back up?
Q. I am upset over something but don’t have the right to be. I posted last hear on Dear cupid and got some good feed back. Let me explain and get your reaction. I have suffered from retroactive jealousy for a number of years. I realize the p...
A. 25 August 2013: Even though you pointed her past out to her and brought it up, in the end you've accomplished nothing. The fact that nothing was said on the aftermath makes this whole situation worse. Instead of seeking help with your jealousy you have introduced ... (read in full...)
My friend doesn't approve of one night stands and now she won't speak to me because I told her that I had one!
Q. So a few months ago I went home with one of my friend's roommates after a party (I was a freshman in college) and we ended up sleeping together. I don't regret a thing, but my best friend from high school doesn't really like how college has changed ...
A. 24 August 2013: There are some things I thought about which I want to mention because I have experienced it as well. I also have friends who feel very strongly about certain aspects of my life to which they strongly oppose...of course at the end of the day it is my ... (read in full...)
Does anyone have any insight into the communication (or lack of) in this relationship?
Q. I met a man through my brother in law. My father recently died and this man is selling the house I inherited. We started communicating through facebook for a week. Last week , he drove three hours to meet me. We had a pleasant time. The weather was ...
A. 22 August 2013: I do not think he is interested in you, else he would be putting some effort into replying and more words into his initial reply. Also he would have texted you first. ... (read in full...)
I feel very anxious and uncomfortable when my boyfriend's ex is around and even found myself reading his emails to her. Do I have a right to feel the way I do?
Q. I have been dating my wonderful boyfriend for a little more than a year. We're both 24. He's my first boyfriend, and 99.9% of the time, I couldn't be happier with him. He literally is one of the most kind, considerate, old-fashioned, respectful ...
A. 21 August 2013: Insecurities is a dangerous thing and you have to realise that no one or any other external factor can make it go away. It is something that you must solve from within. I say this because I have friends who end up in their "ideal" relationships, but ... (read in full...)
Am I doing the right thing for my son?
Q. I got pregnant with my son at 18 by a guy who told me I was a whore and the baby wasn't his. He was my first. He didn't talk to me for four months after that. Then he decided to contact me at which point he basically used me for money and rides when ...
A. 18 August 2013: I 100% think you are doing the right thing. There is no need for them to be in his life, they are not good people nor are they interested in your life or your son's. I think as you continue to find your way and move up in life, they will try harder ... (read in full...)
I thought our relationship was my business! Am I overreacting?
Q. I have been with this guy for a while now. I love him very much and thought he felt the same way. we use to share everything. He is the only guy friend I felt I needed. I don't talk to other guys on the phone or internet. I recently found out that ...
A. 18 August 2013: You should rethink your future to decide if this is a man you want to marry for the long term. I think something is too strange to be married three times and non of it was his fault. Even I can admit to some of my own faults. I also do not think his ... (read in full...)
I can't shake the feeling that she cheated on me
Q. think my girlfriend cheated on me but she denies it. She had a very dramatic event occur in her life and had to go stay with family friends for a couple of months. The family had a son near her age who she opennly admitted she found attractive. ...
A. 16 August 2013: Based on my own past experiences, there is a good chance she cheated on you. I don't like the fact that she has to hide so many things from you and seems like she will continue to deny anything you ask her. There's are just too many red flags for me ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend has retrograde jealousy and its getting worse!
Q. Hello Everyone, I have spent the last week reading everything I could on this website relating to the subject of "Retroactive Jealousy" but I was not able to find much relating to my case (surprisingly, since there is a lot of information here...
A. 13 August 2013: She needs professional help else I don't think there is anything you can do for you and I think you are doing your best anyway. It seems kind of weird her expression of jealousy actually seems like she is attacking you. I don't know if this is some ... (read in full...)
She said I need to date someone my age. What does she mean really?
Q. Dear Savants of Dear Cupid, You all have given me sage advise the numerous times I've ventured forth. You've saved me from wrecking my ship against the rocks, for which I thank you. A question: "What does this mean?" The tennis player conta...
A. 12 August 2013: Yeah it's hard to take advice from a hypocrite. Even I would have a hard time trying to take her words seriously. I think the beer was talking and if I were in your place I would call out her bs. But you shouldn't try to analyse her words anyway, ... (read in full...)
Am I overreacting or do I expect too much from my bf?
Q. For my bday my boyfriend (29 years old) got me Chanel No.5 perfume (kind of strange to me as I was turning 24 and I know this is a much more "mature" perfume). The problem isn't so much with my preference though, my problem is more with how he went ...
A. 10 August 2013: I think I agree with the majority idea that he is indeed a crappy gift giver and well that is something you just have to understand. You seem to have a lot of silent high expectations so it would be better to try to train him to be better at these ... (read in full...)
I'm being supported by my family while in college and I feel like a failure!
Q. This is not a relationship question, but more of a personal struggle I'm trying to cope with. I graduated with my AA in Spring of 2012. I decided to go with a psychology degree though I had intended on going to medical school so it didn't really ...
A. 10 August 2013: Your parents want to see you succeed but I am sure they understand how hard it is to find a suitable career these days. You are still young and we often feel like we should have certain goals "now" in life. Try to take it easy and instead focus on ... (read in full...)
I'm being supported by my family while in college and I feel like a failure!
Q. This is not a relationship question, but more of a personal struggle I'm trying to cope with. I graduated with my AA in Spring of 2012. I decided to go with a psychology degree though I had intended on going to medical school so it didn't really ...
A. 10 August 2013: Your parents want to see you succeed but I am sure they understand how hard it is to find a suitable career these days. You are still young and we often feel like we should have certain goals "now" in life. Try to take it easy and instead focus on ... (read in full...)
I don't want him to fix it, I want him to listen
Q. I've been arguing a lot with my bf lately mostly because every time I talk about things that are happening to me at work or outside of work, he wants to fix everything. He ends up telling me what I should do and want to control me when I'm not even ...
A. 10 August 2013: It is kind of hard to resist giving your own input as a boyfriend when the one you love is complaining. I agree sometimes that there is not a solution to everything and most of the time we all just need someone to listen. At the same time, maybe the ... (read in full...)
What is wrong with me? Why have I never been asked out?
Q. I'm 23 and have never been asked out. I'm smart, go to uni and actively participate in student organisations as well as take part in social work. I love having good discussions and always take genuine interest in listening to the person I'm talking ...
A. 9 August 2013: Maybe if I had a discussion with you I could probably tell why a guy would not make advances. But so far based on how you speak, how you have analysed things and your experiences I think you might have a wall in between you and whatever other ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's phone CONSTANTLY beeps and his friends won't take him off the group message. It's driving me insane!
Q. My boyfriend is a great guy who treats me well. The only issue I have is he recently got an iphone and his group of friends (3 girls and 4 guys) have him on a group message. Now, precious to his getting an iphone he wasn't on any similar group text ...
A. 8 August 2013: Can't he just take off the noise or just change the tone?... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend losing interest in me?
Q. my boyfriend and i have been together 5 months, we started living together when we had only been dating 1 month. he moved out in the middle of july and moved in with one of his close friends (a guy) he said that we fought to much living together. ...
A. 6 August 2013: Seems like before you are rushing things again. It does seem like your friends are right and you are being too clingy. And that sort of behaviour only pushes someone away. Give it some time but if he still doesn't seem interested then you should ... (read in full...)
Mixed expressions from him, I'm not sure if he likes me!
Q. Hi all, Please help me. I'm down with insomnia because of this . There is this guy who I like and also kind of new friend to me . I'm not sure whether this guy likes me. He shows mixed expressions . One day he asked me to come along with him f...
A. 4 August 2013: I think the first step would be to step back and calm down. Surely, this isn't something to suffer with insomnia. I think the guy was just getting to know you and perhaps he is just taking things slow. Although, it is very realistic that he isn't ... (read in full...)
Whichever answer I give is the wrong answer!
Q. Whenever I meet American girl on dating site and we get along well, I get confused when she asks me would like to travel to US? If I say yes, they suspect me approaching her for getting to US. When I answer no, then they thing I don't want to meet ...
A. 27 July 2013: Women are very confusing yes so the best thing to do is to give some mystery/confusion yourself. Instead of answering yes or no, you should try to avoid saying either. Instead say something like "I havn't thought about it but how is it in the US?" ... (read in full...)
Need Advice to get my best male friend back!!
Q. I need help, I'm confused and hurt! I'm a 29 year old female with two kids that just now file for a divorce, before our divorce I always call my childhood friend (married man now) for advice cause he's always good at that, he's the type of friend y...
A. 27 July 2013: There are some things you are missing in this scenario which you can't seem to understand. I want to briefly go over them so give it some thought.
His wife is clearly upset about the amount of attention he has devoted to you over the couple o... (read in full...)
After a month boyfriend wants to have sex but I don't think I'm ready yet
Q. Ok, i have known my boyfriend for a month now he wants to have sex in a way i do too but then i realize im not ready. What should i do?...
A. 26 July 2013: Wait longer and wait as long as you want. This will give you more than enough time to know him better and the thing is, a month or three months is a short time compared to a relationship that can last decades, so take your time in trying to find the ... (read in full...)
MY girlfriend lied to me, we broke up and now everything is a mess
Q. Hi in need of help I have been going out with my girlfriend for 3 and a half years. 10 days ago I had found out she had been lying to me. She had been going out with another guy and hiding it from me. It started out one day when I logged into Fac...
A. 26 July 2013: Why on earth are you trying to seek forgiveness from her? This is exactly what she wants...she wants you to chase her and let you be the one to take the fall for the break up. Let this one go and move on asap because this woman does not love you. ... (read in full...)
The girl I've been dating has basically asked me to be on standby in case it doesn't work out with her ex
Q. So i have been seeing this girl for a month or two. We have had sex multiple times and tells me after the first night that she wants me to be her's. I stay the same and i go on vacation and she doesn't tell me whats going on. I come to find out she ...
A. 23 July 2013: Move on and forget this girl. Even if she comes back are you willing to take her back? No one should ever ask someone else to wait for them. I think that is one of the most misleading things to do. I think you made the right move whether it was for ... (read in full...)
I really like this guy but I didn't follow "the rules"
Q. There is a guy I messaged on match. I was instantly attracted to his pics and his style so I messaged "you are so fine" and he messaged back saying, "I was going to say the same about you!" I didn't think too much of it though because I wanted to ...
A. 21 July 2013: I am 27 as well and I feel like women (around my age) in my country just aren't looking for a long committed relationship. It is weird how life goes sometimes but the most important thing is to just not give up and always believe in yourself. I have ... (read in full...)
After our weekend away together, my boyfriend called me a slut and a whore and said I never leave him alone.
Q. Dear Cupid I am in LDR now with my bf of 4 years. We went for a trip few days ago as we didn't meet for few months. As far as i could see the trip was great and fun. We came back to our respective cities. I called him next day, he sounded ok, but ...
A. 20 July 2013: This is rather odd, are you sure nothing weird happened on the trip?
Well truth be told, you aren't the first young lady I know to be called such names after having intimate moments with their boyfriend. To cut to the point, you have a very bad... (read in full...)
I really like this guy but I didn't follow "the rules"
Q. There is a guy I messaged on match. I was instantly attracted to his pics and his style so I messaged "you are so fine" and he messaged back saying, "I was going to say the same about you!" I didn't think too much of it though because I wanted to ...
A. 20 July 2013: I can't really tell because I don't know these rules you speak of. But I guess I'm a little absent minded as well when it comes to dating. Well maybe you should be patient but in the mean time you can keep your search open. I think you will find ... (read in full...)
Is he really making sense or am I downright stupid?
Q. Ok so my Ex and i spoke about the problems we had, we also had sex he wants to take baby steps in getting back together i don't know why am starting to feel like its a game he's playing because he is still communicating with the girl that he ...
A. 19 July 2013: A child would rather two happy parents who are not together than two parents who are together and are constantly in arguments.
While you do question many things here, the reality of the situation is that you were cheated on. He has also gotten h... (read in full...)
LDR problem, I love him dearly but not sure if he loves me, and don't know what to do. Should I keep on waiting?
Q. I met my Aussie boyfriend 2 and a half years ago. He first flew here and chased after me after 2 months of talking. I was very smitten. We had our ups and downs in our LDR and 16 months forward he flew me to Aus for the first time and took me ...
A. 19 July 2013: I am sorry but LDR is really hard and can only work when two people work towards it. While he hasn't said anything that will indicate more a meaningful future, I don't think you have done or said anything as well. Life isn't about just waiting for ... (read in full...)
He is making me pay for having a higher IQ than him!
Q. Dear Cupid I have a weird problem. I am with my current bf for 3 years who is kind of narcissist. Our sex life is great, i am kind of emotionally dependent on him, but the main problem is, he doesn't like the fact that i am smarter than him...
A. 14 July 2013: I think you should dump him as well as others have said. Someone like this does not love you for who you are whatever their mental condition is.
There are many guys out there who can even love you more and be more emotionally supportive. But if y... (read in full...)
He is making me pay for having a higher IQ than him!
Q. Dear Cupid I have a weird problem. I am with my current bf for 3 years who is kind of narcissist. Our sex life is great, i am kind of emotionally dependent on him, but the main problem is, he doesn't like the fact that i am smarter than him...
A. 14 July 2013: I think you should dump him as well as others have said. Someone like this does not love you for who you are whatever their mental condition is.
There are many guys out there who can even love you more and be more emotionally supportive. But if y... (read in full...)
Why does my long distance girlfriend still have and know my phone number?!?
Q. Just wondering why my ex ldr still has my phone number I mean she does not respond back to me and ect just wondering why she would still have it even though she wanted to move on and changed her phone number 5 or 6 times all ready but I still have ...
A. 12 July 2013: That is a sort of question you should maybe ask her rather than an online forum. There is no way we could exactly know why. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend gives me butterflies, but I'm not crazy about what he's wearing... how can I focus on the less superficial stuff?
Q. Hey everyone, I know I would be judged for this and be called superficial but I really need some input/advise on my situation.. I am seeing this guy for a little over 3 months, he is head over heels in love with me,compliments me a lot, he is very ...
A. 11 July 2013: Leave formals for special occasions and you can just tell him to wear is should the occasion arrive. Changing someone on how they look is rly silly to me and if he is already this amazing just wearing whatever he wants, then what is point in ... (read in full...)
I don`t want to cheat but I`d like some affection from my friend
Q. Ok heres the dilema, I'm married and have 2 kids. Years ago I met a guy who totally blew my world away, we only saw each other for a short time and were never intimate sexually. I had to break it off because my ex wanted me back in my life and ...
A. 11 July 2013: This is usually called cheating and as you can tell on this site, it never is really a good idea. You were the one who made the choice to be with your current spouse, learn to live with the choices you have made. ... (read in full...)
Me, the socially anxious goof accidentally sends friend request… do I contact him and explain?
Q. So this is probably going to sound like the dorkiest thing ever, but I need some help. I started college last fall and it was a real struggle for me to leave home and adjust. There were a lot of things that went wrong my first few weeks at school ...
A. 9 July 2013: Not that it is creepy but it seems a bit too much all at once to send a request AS WELL as a message. If you rly didn't mean to send the request (I think you did mean to send it) you can always go back to his profile and cancel the request. ... (read in full...)
I resent my boyfriend for what he said and I don't feel as if he should "benefit" from the relationship in that case!
Q. Hi everyone. My question is about my boyfriend of 3 years, he is 8 years older and has 2 kids. He does not want more and told me he would never have chidren with me. I was not sure what I wanted, but have now decided I don't want to have kids. So ...
A. 8 July 2013: Is his poor financial situation a good reason for not having kids? Else I would think he was being really honest and has his mind made up on the matter. I think you are maybe over thinking the emotional factor in this.... (read in full...)
She rejected me and then months later texts me. Is she regretting her decisions?
Q. Hi readers. So this girl I haven't talked to in months (Christmas basically) texted me tonight out of nowhere saying hey. I have a feeling she's bored, or she's reconsidering rejecting me. I don't know. I'm making small talk with her now, but I want ...
A. 8 July 2013: Come straight with her and find out what she wants, a relationship or whatever. ... (read in full...)
Should I take a risk and go abroad to see him, even though he is involved with someone?
Q. I have had strong feelings for this since I was a teenager...he moved abroad and we kept in contact..he stated that he felt the same way as well...sometimes in my heart I feel like we are soul mates...but another part of me is scared that it is ...
A. 7 July 2013: I think it is bit much of a stretch to travel to another country, just to see someone, especially when that someone already is with someone else. I think it is too much to do for someone. Soul Mates? How can you be soul mates with someone who isn't ... (read in full...)
My ex dumped me and hasn't been in touch since, but I miss him and want to contact him
Q. I was with my ex for four years. He dumped me two months ago. I was mad and hated him the first month, but I started missing him like crazy recently. He never contacted me after the break up, never asked what I'm up to or how I am. I don't have the ...
A. 6 July 2013: Honestly, don't message him and keep trying to move on with your life without him. I know it seems harsh right now but I am sure he has his reasons, and do not need to know them. Things wont be the same but hey, now you can date or seek interests on ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend only has female friends. Is this weird?
Q. Is it Normal for my boyfriend to only have female friends? I mean he only has like 2 guy friends the rest are females he is always calling and texting them it's sort of annoying . I don't think he is sleeping with them or anything like that, most ...
A. 3 July 2013: Talk to him and indeed those issues should be private. That is something that should be between the two of you.
I don't think it is weird he has no many girlfriends, after all he does have guy friends as well. ... (read in full...)
I wanna know why he's being a creeper and what do I do when he brings over girls to our house.
Q. Ive spent the last year sleeping with this guy. We spent almost everyday together and I knew we weren't together and he told me he didnt want a relationship with me I understand that he's a user so I don't want you guys to reiterate that fact to ...
A. 3 July 2013: He is living his life they way he wants, you should do the same. Instead of questioning him and his motives you should focus on yourself more and aim to find your own place or so . He isn't really doing anything wrong because he is not exclusive ... (read in full...)
Demanding Sister Wants Gift for her Kid
Q. Last year my niece turned three years olf. She had an amazing birthday party with lots of family and gifts. My sister just confessed that she was upset with the fact I did not get her than 3 year old a gift. My niece is turning four soon and my ...
A. 3 July 2013: Just buy something you can afford. The gift is for your niece not the parents lol :) Just make sure it is quality. Ignore your sister, you can not please everyone. ... (read in full...)
Is she only messing around?
Q. Hello everybody. I really need some objective opinions here. I'm currently in a FWB relationship with a girl I like very much. As in, A LOT. But she's clearly not that into me, she has told me that explicitly and she rejected me when I asked for...
A. 3 July 2013: You should just move on and find someone who will give you the love you deserve. You are wasting your time with this girl and sorry to say, you are way over reading into everything when she been straight with you. So stop trying to create something ... (read in full...)
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