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... Send *earo a private message | | | *earo's profile:Nothing qualifies me to help people. But I always try to treat people the way I treat my best friends when they need help. It doesn't take much to help someone. Sometimes all they need is an open ear.
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Need tips to help a player boy falling madly in love with me but not handling it well
Q. I am dealing with a man who is having difficulty handling Love and handling it very strangely. I am concerned for his wellbeing. Well I met this guy a month and some days ago who from what I was told by many, he was a bad boy you know AKA player p...
A. 2 August 2014: I don't really understand why you would want to settle down with someone who is unsure about his own worth. I am not particularly fond of rules and games because you can have 100 guys flock around you or date less then 3 people over 10 years and the ... (read in full...)
Why should I have to pay to have given him a second chance that has crushed me?
Q. I had a boyfriend for ten months that I loved alot, and he said he loved me too. We are in our late 30s. He left me for his ex that he was married too, she didnt want him to move on. She didnt like me, so she said shed give it another try if I was ...
A. 29 July 2014: This situation has sprung up in some friends of mine and I have indeed analyzed this situation to a great deal. Having said that, I think any analysis of this situation would end up in the same resulting advice from any thoughtful person: he doesn't ... (read in full...)
If this marriage was so important to her, then why didn't she stop contacting her ex?
Q. I got married a few months ago, it was a rushed wedding, after barely knowing each other we married because she told me to get married because I was having trouble with my immigration status and it would give me a green card and working visa ...
A. 26 July 2014: That doesn't sound like a marriage to me. You are just her ticket to being debt free and simply put, she is taking you for granted. She wants to manipulate you and have you wrapped around her finger but by now, chances are that she doesn't need you ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend has baby mama drama and I'm being pushed aside
Q. I am dealing with some baby momma drama. My boyfriend and I have been in a relationship for about a year and a half. We really love each other and talk about a future together. We are both professionals....im a resident physician and he in school to ...
A. 22 July 2014: Does not sound like there are any legal entities here, why is that? No visitation rights? Is this kid really his? How come she has so much control over him? Why doesn't he stand up for himself?
I don't think there is anything you can do here, ot... (read in full...)
How do you tell a fake cry from a real cry? I think my ex fake cried to get me back!
Q. Im not sure, but I think my ex might have fake cried as a way of trying to get me back. He told me before that he cried to try and get his exes back but he did it becuase he knew it would get them back. He knows that I know this, and he s...
A. 21 July 2014: So did you only go back with him because he was crying? I don't think it would matter if he meant it or not. It only mattered if you kept true to your word and listen to yourself. ... (read in full...)
Why are some women so insecure when it comes to porn?
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together for the last five years. We met in high school and pretty much hit it off right away. We became instantly close from then and although we have our own share of problems, porn was never one of them. We have b...
A. 18 July 2014: Women like being in charge of a man's happiness and if a man makes himself happy, there will be hell to pay.
There are a lot things here which come into play if you want to compare your relationship to others. And every bit you want to compare ... (read in full...)
My wife of 20 years invites a man to stay the night at our home? Is this weird?
Q. Hi, Is it strange that my wife of 20 years invites another man to stay the night at our house? She apparently arranged this visit several weeks back, but didn't let me know about the plans, ask for my opinion, nor tell me until a few days bef...
A. 15 July 2014: Of course it is weird. That is not normal. Not sure what more to say here but good luck with this madness. ... (read in full...)
Why do all my relationships end up with me being used?
Q. My relationships always go south and I end up with guys who treat me badly or only want one thing. This last guy, I met at a meeting for this local political group we're both involved in. We ended up talking and flirting a little (no physical con...
A. 14 July 2014: I don't see how you can blame yourself for the way someone is. This is natural when it comes to dating, you find out who they really are and that can either be a really good thing or a really bad thing.
When it comes to dating you should be the o... (read in full...)
My older boyfriend is very controlling
Q. Hi,I'm 19 and my boyfriend is 31. At the beginning of our relationship things were great. He was a gentleman, gave me great advice, was always doing little things to show me he cared. Those things haven't changed but now he also does other little ...
A. 12 July 2014: Given the age gap there is a general understand (especially in this country) that the older will have more leverage/control over partners who are much younger. Having said that, all of the problems you mentioned indicate a lack communication on your ... (read in full...)
He went through so much with his ex I wonder if I'm a rebound?
Q. Please Bare with me because my story is long and detailed. Three years ago, I started working at a Psychiatric Board and Care Facility as a housekeeper. I was 18 then, from being a housekeeper, I changed linens, worked in the kitchen, drove p...
A. 10 July 2014: Trust takes time. You can't expect to feel everything after just a week and everyone has their flaws and mistakes. You should slow down and smell the flowers. It sounds like you might be turning yourself into a rebound. ... (read in full...)
I don't deserve how she ended the relationship
Q. My ex and I were together for about 20 months. Both women. She broke up with me recently and blind sided me. Never saw it coming. Truth be told, I don't really think she did, either. During the conversation it happened in, she at first kept saying ...
A. 7 July 2014: There is usually always a disgusting reason behind surprise breakups so don't hold your breathe for the truth. And don't hope for a gentle reason like someone needing time for themselves. Grab yourself some tissues, junk food and a comedy flick ... (read in full...)
He says I am the only one, but his social media tells a different story
Q. im confused should I continue trying and keep being spontaneous or should I just move on?? I met this guy 6 months ago, he happened to be my valentine because he wanted to hang out then. we've been talking on and off for about 6 months. we've be...
A. 5 July 2014: He isn't your boyfriend so you shouldn't expect him to be committed to you yet. Since he's saying all these things to you, he is trying to get you to open up. You've already said that you cancel plans with him for other things so this dating game ... (read in full...)
Can a married person having an affair have the right to accuse the partner of being deceitful?
Q. Does this make any sense or am I wrong? Here's the scenario: a single guys is having a torrid love affair with a married woman for a long time. He only sleeps with her but does socialize with other women, and men of course, from time to time, bu...
A. 4 July 2014: Some women tend to reach that level of crazy pretty easily. But can you blame em? The woman in question had to deal with that idea of cheating for many years and at some point she convinced herself that it was the right thing to do. Perhaps this was ... (read in full...)
How do I handle this situation? My mother in law and sister in law chose to get my son's hair cut without our permission. Am I over-reacting? It will grow. It's the disrespect that irritates me
Q. Hello Agony aunts, I have a major issue that I need advice on. My husband and I have a 2yr old son. He is currently in our hometown visiting family. My mother n law and sister n law decided to get my son hair cut( this was his 2nd cut) without...
A. 28 June 2014: Your son is sort of on his vacation I guess and they want to spoil him or do things for him. It is nice as a relative to be able to do things for each other without permission don't you think so? It's not like they took him out of your house without ... (read in full...)
I called off the wedding. But how do I get past the guilt if I leave him?
Q. I was until recently, engaged to be married. I called off the wedding because my fiancé yells a lot, is very stressed (life choices, poor planning, disorganization, plus regular stresses of job, kids, etc.), blames me and others for everything, ...
A. 26 June 2014: I don't think there is anything else for you to do on your part. The rest is up to him and it doesn't seem like he will ever step up to the plate to change. He could be very much be content with his life. You should probably start thinking about the ... (read in full...)
I am jealous of my boyfriend's daughter and I'm currently pregnant with his kid
Q. I know how horrible this makes me sound but I can't seem to stop it, as much as I want to. He has a daughter who i just about 3 years old. Since the beginning of our relationship I always felt a tinge of jealousy when he'd cancel plans with me ...
A. 24 June 2014: You took the liberty to leave out the things you wrote in your text messages in your post. This allows me to assume that your text messages contained your jealousy and even though you did not ask him specifically to choose between you and his ... (read in full...)
Am I too ugly for guys to like me?
Q. I'm 20 years old and college has definitely helped me put on the pounds, so I'm huge everywhere except for my boobs. They look the same as they did when I was a scrawny 7th grader. I also have really short hair because I think I look better with it ...
A. 23 June 2014: Appearance is important in many factors of life. When you go to a job interview, you try to look professional, suit, clean hair cut and a spit shine on your shoe. If you want to date or party, you also need to look the part. Appearance is not ... (read in full...)
How do I best deal with my Bf who seems insecure about friendships I form?
Q. I moved city this year to live with boyfriend. We flat with his friends: two other guys and a girl. I have a hard time making friends because I'm shy and it takes me a while to get comfortable with people. Recently I've been getting on well with one ...
A. 23 June 2014: This is almost a natural thing to happen, after all you are in the city with new found opportunities. I think you may feel the same way if you were in his position. Don't worry about it too much or let it stop you from living a happy life.
T... (read in full...)
It feels like I am putting in all the effort with this girl!
Q. Hey everyone so ill try to make it as short as i can ive been stressing over these past couple of days trying to make the best decision. So ive been in a LDR for about 3 months ive met this girl as a friend i also met her family aswell before we ...
A. 22 June 2014: Sounds like she is just using you. Grow some distance and see how she reacts to it. ... (read in full...)
My partner's lifestyle has me completely turned off
Q. I've been with an individual for over 11 years. We have one amazing son together, but I feel like our son is what/who keeps us together(now).I was never physically attracted to my partner. I fell in love with how safe I felt with him,how gentle he ...
A. 22 June 2014: How about taking your issues to a third party if you have tried resolving them with him? ... (read in full...)
He seems awfully close to his ex
Q. So I've been dating this guy for a month almost to. Him and his ex just recently broke up. And he's still friends with her. They talk every single day and all day! Even when he's with me sometimes. They dated for over a year and lived together. ...
A. 18 June 2014: He's young so this sort of behavior is somewhat expected. But if they are so close, why did they even break up?
I don't think any girlfriend would accept these sort of habits though. I am even surprised you are still with him! I think the matu... (read in full...)
He'd rather text me than call
Q. Why do guys take so much pain from their ex and treat the one good girlfriend badly. Don't get me wrong i love my bf but he's changed. We see eachother every other weekend. All we do is text and I've asked him to atleast call me a few times a week ...
A. 16 June 2014: There is a good chance this is how he acted with his ex gf(s) as well. You can't win a girl's heart by buying her and if you are serious about a girl, the chances are that she won't cheat on you.
Fast forward to your relationship, if he isn't sh... (read in full...)
My nude modelling job went horribly wrong, the photographer now has graphic pics of me and I'm afraid of the repercussions
Q. Hi, I'm almost 21. Yesterday I did a modelling job, supposedly completely professional and artistic in nature. I was made to sign a release but assumed it was okay (I have difficultly reading long passages) and the photographer seemed nice. He asked ...
A. 14 June 2014: The people who often think they are the safest by being reclusive are the one who appear the most vulnerable.. I don't know if this question was serious because it says you know some things about the industry but I am pretty sure I have never heard ... (read in full...)
Catholic man marrying atheist woman. Catholic church, civil ceremony or compromise?
Q. I am a catholic. My fiance is an atheist. We have been together for nearly 4 years and love each other very much. I want to get married in a catholic church and she wants a civil ceremony. We have stalled with wedding plans because we just don't ...
A. 12 June 2014: I think there just has to be a compromise somewhere. Perhaps a civil ceremony in a religious place/location. Like a different country or so. Not sure why there is an argument of religious beliefs or lack there of in this thread but if I were in your ... (read in full...)
I know I should just suck it up, but I am JEALOUS!
Q. Hi there, I have come here to get feedback on what really is just me being silly, but I can't seem to help it. I'm 21 years old and my boyfriend is 22. We're both postgraduate university students. We've been together for two years and during that ...
A. 5 June 2014: I am not sure the type of guy he is. For example some guys tend to be calm and collective when they give compliments. Other types of guys do it to look for attention and to boost their already large ego. If your guy is just a quiet, nice guy type ... (read in full...)
How do you know if it's going to be just FWBs or lead to something else? I want to avoid being used!
Q. This is a general question which I'm sure will have varied opinions but I'm asking because of situations I've been in which I just don't know how I could have prevented. I'm going to use the classic girl / boy situation because it seems the most ...
A. 5 June 2014: It's simple really. You need to set standards for yourself and if they aren't being met, you walk away. When it comes to sex, you just wait until you feel comfortable and know enough about the guy. A rule of thumb is about three months before having ... (read in full...)
Are we dating or is this just FWB?
Q. Before I ask this question, I'm going to ask that if you want to answer, just answer respectfully. I recently started seeing a 30 year old man. We have gone on a few dates before about a year ago and once about 6 months ago, but I sort of backed o...
A. 29 May 2014: Sounds like you both do a lot of stuff that long term couples do. You just need the verbal re-assurance. Perhaps this is just something you need to bring up and talk it over with him. ... (read in full...)
Twenty eight and throwing tantrums
Q. My lovely live in boyfriend has some sort of anxiety and depression. He has spoken to people about it in the past, and been on antidepressants before my time. His recount on things I've said or scenarios that have happened where he ended up getting ...
A. 26 May 2014: He should get professional help and you need to stop nurturing his behavior. What he is doing is wrong and you should not stand for this. ... (read in full...)
If he's married now why is he trying to contact me?
Q. *I know that what i did and how i acted was my fault so you don't need to tell me that.* I'm feeling quite low at the moment and have been trying to get my head around everything that's happened in the past couple of years. I got involved with a ...
A. 25 May 2014: He just wants you for sex. The moment you give him the time of day, he will tell you what you need to hear to give him sex. Or maybe he is changed but who cares...certainly you should not be the one to care. I wish there was an easy way to put it, ... (read in full...)
I drunk-dialed him, HUGE mistake. How do I get over that?
Q. I'd been kind of seeing a guy for about the last six months. Nothing serious, just a lot of chatting and the occasional hookup. The problem is, I REALLY like him and I was beginning to get frustrated with him not seeming to want to commit. Last week ...
A. 23 May 2014: Perhaps it was a mistake but it needed to happen. This is your wake up call. He did not like you and never would have. Six months and nothing? If I ever said that to grass, it would grow the ability to laugh.
Play some sonngs (The Script-N... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is too truthful!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for two years now. We both Graduated from college; where I met him. He's trying to start up his legal justice career and I'm on the same path for child and youth studies. We've lived together for about a year ...
A. 23 May 2014: Sounds like he has a lot of pride. There's a difference between truthful and being a bitch about it. For example, one could say, even if you gain weight, I would still think you are perfect (This is how I would genuinely feel about someone after 2 ... (read in full...)
Bad impression of company after first job interview. Do I send a thank you note or leave it behind?
Q. I recently finished my last semester of university and will be taking just one more class this summer. After that, I will be officially graduated. I had my first professional interview today with a small company. The company has been around for 20 ...
A. 23 May 2014: The guy was basically saving you all the sales pitch bull shit that comes with a new job. Most young people, after three or more months usually go "this is not what I expected". But in the real world, businesses need to see the motivation before ... (read in full...)
Is my girlfriend drinking too much?
Q. I have a question about my girfriend. I think for a woman she drinks quite a bit. I am not a big drinker, may be that's why for me it seems like a lot. She ussualy goes between 7-10 drinks a week. She doesn't drink every day, but when she is out w...
A. 23 May 2014: Sounds normal to me (both over-drinker and social drinker). Don't see how it will become a problem if it isnt a problem now. And getting buzzed is normal, it's usually the goal/idea behind drinking. ... (read in full...)
If you initiated the breakup how did you feel afterwards?
Q. My 11-month relationship ended a week and a half ago. It started with me bringing up his gaming habits and completely ignoring me. He did this during our 5-6 month phase. He talked about it then, and he said he does it because he doesn't know wha...
A. 23 May 2014: Things happened for the best. He can't emotionally support you and his gaming is his means of escape. I obviously think that the gaming has become an easy means of escape, similar to a bad addiction. He knows this as well so his solution is to let ... (read in full...)
Should I feel bad for moving on first?
Q. There's this girl that I liked at my college. We were friends for a good few months. We went out together, partied together, did crazy stuff and just all around enjoyed each other's company. We even entrusted each other with some pretty embarrassing ...
A. 18 May 2014: It's not the end of the world dude. And it certainly isn't for her. Friends falling for each other happens all the time. Sometimes shit happens, and you gotta pick yourself up and move on again. You didn't do anything wrong. She didn't do anything ... (read in full...)
No way will my husband approve of this job
Q. I married young, and I regret not waiting. I'm 24 now, and while I love my husband very much, but I feel suffocated. Recently he has be pressuring me into getting a job in a field I hate. I suffered 2 years of hell in the same field already, t...
A. 18 May 2014: I get that your husband is pressuring you for a job. Pressuring someone for anything for that matter is generally a bad thing to do. It certainly does not make them want to go after it.
I also don't think you should hide about a job. A job is a... (read in full...)
I've become very uncomfortable with this "friendship"
Q. So I have this guy friend... I don't even know whether to call him a friend because we don't really interact outside when we bump into each other at a mutual friend's house or something. One random night, about 1.5-2 years ago, we talked late into...
A. 17 May 2014: I think you should just avoid this guy 100%.
You shouldn't be surprised that he disrespected both relationships just because you think otherwise. You've done the same as him in the past and he simply thinks otherwise. He would think "well we did ... (read in full...)
Co-worker's flirting is going to get her into trouble
Q. I have this co worker who is very flirtatious with everyone and it's causing trouble here at work and for herself. She's a really nice person and I don't think she's doing it on purpose but it's really getting out of hand. The other day, this guy ...
A. 9 May 2014: Shouldn't the manager step in and try to train her? She's not a little kid and she is there to work. If she is badly stepping out of line then I don't see what her feelings have to do with anything here. ... (read in full...)
I have a problem with men sexually objectifying women!
Q. I have a real problem with the fact my partner objectifies women, I know most men look at other women and because men have more to look at on a woman's body, a woman's body can be more aesthetically appealing, I get that and I get that men are men ...
A. 7 May 2014: He objectifies women and you get turned on from him pleasing himself....you sound perfect for each other actually. I think it would help if you talked more about it with him and be sincere about it. I am sure he will be taken aback but I don't think ... (read in full...)
Is he cheating, texting her, wanting her back?
Q. I have been in a relationship for going on 6 months. After falling madly for each other I thought that we were doing great. He was attentive, we rarely had harsh words and he ended up moving into my apartment with me. Just last month I noticed that ...
A. 7 May 2014: I honestly think that these are the kinds of things that need to be worked on before moving in with each other. Relationships are not about bending backwards just to force "deserved" love and commitment. I am not saying that you are wrong or ... (read in full...)
'I was hurting for so long that after a while I became numb to the pain'... what does that mean?
Q. What does it mean when an ex says to you 'I was hurting for so long that after a while I became numb to the pain? - This was in reference to a conversation about our break up just before christmas, it was awful since I was in a bad place and didn't ...
A. 6 May 2014: Sounds like you caused her a lot of pain and she got used to it to the point where she expected only such. If she didn't deserve it then I assume you were a bully to her. I am not sure what else to say as I thought her message was straight forward, ... (read in full...)
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