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... Send *earo a private message | | | *earo's profile:Nothing qualifies me to help people. But I always try to treat people the way I treat my best friends when they need help. It doesn't take much to help someone. Sometimes all they need is an open ear.
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I don't want to pay for her martinis and lobster plate.
Q. I have a question on what to do in this situation., We go out once a month with my girlfriends. we usually split the check equally., We noticed long ago that one of the girls when we re out orders in exess. By that I mean: she orders always t...
A. 11 December 2014: Separate checks, or just plainly say you are not paying that much extra and the other person has to put up their own share. You all are adults and even with my group of friends, we make sure everything is at least fair. ... (read in full...)
Why do men persist when they know you are aleady attached?
Q. Hello all, just curious, are there guys out there who despite knowing that a lady is attached, still goes all the way out to ask her out on dates because he is interested in her? And if so, why would they do that when there are many ladies who are ...
A. 9 December 2014: I want to say that men and women do this all the time. It's been going on for centuries so I don't think it will stop anytime soon.
My own explanation I came up with, is that people who are taken appear to be at their best. People in a happy re... (read in full...)
My wife wants my permission to go out and flirt with other men when it suits her
Q. My wife and I have been together for 17 years, married for 12. We're still young-ish in our 30s because we met young. We've had a great marriage overall and have a relationship that was genuingely best friends first, then it became romantic. She ...
A. 8 December 2014: Flirting is a lesser of the evils but the way I see it, it is still an evil. Flirting would be ok if both are ok with it. Clearly you are not ok with it so I am dumbfounded on why a partner would even want to continue to bring it up. What is the ... (read in full...)
Is she waiting until we're in a position to be married, or is she pushing me away?
Q. Dear readers, My post is kind of long, so please bear with me.. It all started in 2011 when i got a text message from my childhood schoolmate. We started speaking well. Infact we used to text each other rather through out day and night. Then one...
A. 7 December 2014: Good day sir,
I also find her actions very strange and thus very confusing. I think the answer is that she herself is confused but she has come to learn to remove confusion in her life. I do not believe ignoring you on Whatsapp and ignoring... (read in full...)
I feel like my romantic life is constantly on a fast track to destruction.
Q. I want to start off by saying I have serious issues with self worth. Some was instigated by my family situation growing up and has been perpetuated by guys that I date. I realize that I am typically attracted to a certain kind of guy who i know is ...
A. 7 December 2014: Life is very short and it would be a shame to waste it on all the bad things. I am not sure how your social circle is and who is actually in your life but you need some positive encouragement. Whether that comes from yourself or your social circle ... (read in full...)
Time to open the marriage?
Q. Here's our situation: not having sex. I am about 50 lbs overweight. I have been working on losing it but it's going very slowly (I have lost 20 so far). My husband has told me I'm unattractive--yet he still wants sex with me and says he still ...
A. 7 December 2014: Divorce sounds like a much better alternative here than anything else. Does not sound like much of a marriage and you are both piling on more problems than solutions as time progresses. ... (read in full...)
Stay single or pursue a relationship?
Q. I need some love advice. I am a 17 year old girl who has been in one relationship and recently one of my guy friends from school has started to show signs of attraction to me; again. We have been friends for maybe about a year or two, and we met ...
A. 1 December 2014: You haven't really given any reasons on why you should be/stay single. If he's a nice guy and you think you are ready then go for it. Life is short already, don't waste it and later regretting, wondering if you should have when you had the chance. ... (read in full...)
I've become that "once a week" girl and don't know what to do? I've tried cutting ties before. Do I express what I feel?
Q. I've known this man for a year. In the first 5 months he would contact daily, see me as often as he could, do huge romantic gestures. He even told me once I gave him "too much space". 6 months pass and we had a falling out that left him embarra...
A. 30 November 2014: I am not entirely sure about your history with him because it seems like you left out exactly what these events were. I would say he's having a change of pace which is the same as you are doing. He's taking things slow and most likely keeping his ... (read in full...)
I know that my boyfriend didn't do anything wrong but just running into his ex ruined our night and his behavior didn't make things any better
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for over 4 years. 2 girls before me, he dated a girl for around 3 or 4 years. They've been broken up for over 5 years now. They had an awful relationship where they fought, physically and verbally. She pretty ...
A. 29 November 2014: Realistically speaking, you should know what he really means when he says that she is irrelevant. You should be able to understand his situation considering his past with her. Aren't you the one dating him? These are the types of situations where ... (read in full...)
Why? Why is she not into me anymore?
Q. So I have been with this girl for almost a year and at first she seemed so interested then she went on a little vacation sort of speak and while there I would talk to her on the phone and write each other letters. She told me that her old behavior...
A. 29 November 2014: I think you hit the nail on the head, she's most likely seeing someone else or is interested in someone else. Not really sure how this affects you, but you are wasting time even talking to this girl, she's not even much of a friend.
Seems... (read in full...)
I'm tired of being blindsided by being told stuff I've done wrong
Q. I have no clue how to respond or handle my girlfriend. She has this habit of blindsiding me when I least expect it. We will spend a few days in a row together and I will think everything is great and amazing. Next thing I know, I'm waking up to a 10 ...
A. 28 November 2014: I think this is something she has to learn because she shouldn't be (obviously) overeating to these things like teasing or disagreeing with her. She should know that you are not intentionally hurting her so I think she is not seeing the real you. ... (read in full...)
How do I help my sister with our overprotective mother?
Q. Hi there, please advise? My mother is very overprotective of my sister, who is 18. Really, she has not allowed the girl to learn to do tasks on her own (such as grocery shopping, checking the mail, hanging out with friends, simple cooking, etc.) a...
A. 24 November 2014: If you want to help your sister then do so, but she also needs to learn for herself. You know better than anyone that no one teaches you everything about life, and most of the things we have to learn ourselves anyway. It will be a hard transition ... (read in full...)
Am I reading too much into this?
Q. A married male new co worker of mine invited me to a party he is throwing next month. lol I don't know if he has invited anyone else from work, we have only spoken to each other on three separate occasions and it was brief each time. He made it a ...
A. 24 November 2014: I think you should find out if anyone else it going, it shouldn't be too hard. ... (read in full...)
My best friend freaked out over the 'maid of honor' title
Q. My Best friend just completely freaked out on me because she isn't going to be my Maid of Honor. Best friend and I have been best friends for over 20 years. We have both been there for each other in good times and bad. I was the maid of honor at...
A. 23 November 2014: Like you said it's just a title but then why do you have to put it on your deceased sister? In a work place, titles mean something. Titles also mean something among family. I would think even the title of best friend means something different than ... (read in full...)
Do I ask her if she likes me or just move on?
Q. There is this girl, and to make it short, I feel as if she stole my heart an never gave it back. Therefore it's really hard for me to be open to feel anything for anyone else. I told her I like her but she reacted in the way I figured she woul...
A. 20 October 2014: I think if she liked you she would have told you the same time you told her. You may be wasting your time to wait for her because chances are that she will only see you as a friend. You can stay in her life but only at arms length, as friends should ... (read in full...)
Advice for dating someone who has children when you've never had any?
Q. Hi I was wondering if someone could share their experience dating with kids. My boyfriend has two children, 14 and 9 and I have none. I have never been a kid person and never really wanted any of my own. The 14 year old boy is ok because he is very ...
A. 20 October 2014: I think this needs way more time before you decide to involve this kids into your life. I agree that kids are easy to get used to, but he should not force this into your life. Give it a few more months if dating is working out, and bit by bit you ... (read in full...)
Have I ruined my life as a result of having an affair with a married man at a vulnerable time in my life.
Q. For a period of time from 2011-2013, I had an affair with a married man. I make no excuses for my behavior, which was terrible, but I had earlier that year been assaulted, had gotten out of a long-term relationship, and my self-esteem was at all t...
A. 20 October 2014: Your life is what you decide it should be. Everyone has been through hard times and everyone knows that life generally throws the hardest punches. The one's who choose to stand back up are the ones who have a bigger chance to succeed. Life will ... (read in full...)
I've discovered what he and his mother think about me and it's very hurtful! I don't know what to do next!
Q. My bf of 4yrs and I are currently on a sort of "break". It has been about a month now. The reason for the break is something very minor and working towards repairing our relationship. Today I logged into my other laptop and I realised that he...
A. 8 October 2014: I am not entirely sure what you are asking but I would say that this is a relationship deal breaker. Your bf obviously has a lot of growing up to do and his parents do not like you. I have no idea why you should continue to entertain the thoughts of ... (read in full...)
Am I Really Overrreacting or Is He in The Wrong When It Comes to Not Talking to Me?
Q. Hello. I'd like to give a little background before any opinons are made so please bare with me. My boyfriend and I will have been together 3 years this coming October and we are both 22 years old going on 23. I have asked something like this in the ...
A. 19 September 2014: It sounds like he does more than his fair share in the relationship. You need to wake up and realize that you need to become someone he can depend on and not someone who is only dependent on the other.
Try to find something to do during the day ... (read in full...)
Why doesn't he see my potential? Is he sexist? Complacent about life?
Q. I feel like my boyfriend doesnt understand one aspect of my life and I need help explaining this to him. I am going to graduate late next year with a degree in engineering. I have worked very hard with my school and it is because I want to provide ...
A. 18 September 2014: I think he sees your potential but he just doesn't like big cities. I can understand why as well. Things tend to be very expensive and space is generally limited. Rush hour is awful and the quality of life for peace of mind is not so great. Well ... (read in full...)
My ex says if I date before my kids are grown he'll keep my property
Q. My last Question was in March about the living situation with my ex. Well the relationship could not be repaired and we went our seperate ways shortly after. We are still in contact having a child together, and we are in a legal battle over some ...
A. 14 September 2014: I can not answer the payment issues though I do believe a layer can help you more than any of us could and he should offer some amazing clarity on the matter.
As far as your ex goes, I am somewhat surprised you chose to tell him. You have adm... (read in full...)
How do I change the feelings of indifference toward my husband? Is it just a slump? Or have I fallen out of love with him?
Q. Hey Aunts and Uncles, I am in desperate need of advice. I have started to become indifferent toward my husband. He works a lot. 5 days a week from 530am-5pm. Right now hes also remodeling a house so hes gone all weekend. Right now we only have one ...
A. 14 September 2014: A great relationship works by asking yourself what can you do for the relationship instead of what you can get out of it. He obviously is putting in 120% into the marriage including the house, financial security, kids and your emotional needs so I ... (read in full...)
I do not like my fiance's disrespect towards my personal space or the way he lets his niece invade it!
Q. i have been really upset with my fiancé since two weekends ago, i am really particular about my personal space and he knows that, as a young child i had to share a room with my brothers while living in an extended family household, my parents built ...
A. 12 September 2014: Your fiance obviously has not taken notice of his niece's behavior or he most likely does not care. These are core values which if it is a problem now, will not change, and will only become worse to the extent that you will become the enemy of the ... (read in full...)
My best friend has suddenly become less helpful and I'm not sure how to handle it
Q. Best friend is suddenly hardly helpful. My best friend and I have been friends for 20 years. She has always been easygoing and happy to help. However, over the past few years she has actually been quick to say "No" about a lot of things that I wo...
A. 12 September 2014: You said you understood her past and that she has a right to say no...but then you bring up all these issues as if she had no right to say no.
So just because she lives closer to the consignment shop she has no right to complain that it is far? ... (read in full...)
Where do you draw the line between friendship and something more?
Q. How do I know if my best friend and I are really just friends or if there is potential for something more? We met at work and have become especially close in the last few months. We always know exactly what is on the other's mind and we are rarely ...
A. 1 September 2014: Question is, what do YOU think it is? Is she your friend? Are you interested in more? How does she feel? Has she ever given it thought?
It sounds like you definitely go out of your way for her and this is where trouble tends to occur. You should s... (read in full...)
Should I believe my girlfriend and what she says about her past?
Q. my girlfriend and I were talking about past sexaul experiences and she told me she had sex with 2 guys. I really do not care what she did before me, but she said the boy that lived next door fingered her for 3 years but never had sex with her.I k...
A. 29 August 2014: You just said that you do not care what she did before you, so what's the deal? Does it matter?... (read in full...)
My boyfriend called me ugly, should I be upset?
Q. I've been with my bf for about 3 years now. He's never called me ugly before (and I'm not too attractive) but recently I've made a new guy friend and I was texting him a lot today. My boyfriend was with me and he kept asking who i was texting. I ...
A. 27 August 2014: Sounds like a line out of Ace Ventura Pet Detective.
I guess you should be mad, but why are you texting another guy from another state anyway? ... (read in full...)
Help cliquey work colleagues, yes it's not unusual but It hurts!
Q. last night I worked a night shift with 2 younger girls from the uk, they are good friends in and out of work , which isfine but they made no effort to include me in any conversation, I know we are there to work and they are friends, but..no matter ...
A. 26 August 2014: Social grouping is normal and is often fond of excluding 1 by making that person a common oddity. In this case you just have to deal with them, not be friends with them.... (read in full...)
5 year relationship ending because of us being jealous and controlling
Q. MOD NOTE: 2 questions put into one Hello there, Yesterday my bf of 5 years told me on the phone he does not know what to do, he thinks to end the relationship is best for both of us because we will have more arguments. I cried on the phone and he...
A. 24 August 2014: You should be able to see the things he is saying as well, that the relationship just isn't working out. He wants different things and at the end of the day, he is most likely just not in love with you anymore. I can't imagine why you or anyone ... (read in full...)
Do I travel with her, or go no contact?
Q. Hey guys. I posted on here a couple of weeks ago and I need some additional advice. The background: My girlfriend and I split up a little over two weeks ago (both women). It wasn't a lack of love that caused the split. She's just been suffering f...
A. 16 August 2014: Nothing has essentially changed. If you want her to heal you have to go no contact ( I doubt 2 weeks is enough to cure a lifetime of trauma ). Sometimes you have to show tough love to the other person including yourself. I will just out right say ... (read in full...)
How has the porn industry shaped our view on relationships?
Q. I would like to know woman's view on the porn industry and how it has shaped our view on relationships. Are we being forced to believe that this is the way we should be having sex and to like it? Porn has changed over the last 20 years, the acts ...
A. 15 August 2014: Porn industry is an industry that will change because there is a lot of money to be made so I feel like it does not pave the way for society, it prefers to react to it. Whatever the people want, the industry is happy to supply it. Free porn is ... (read in full...)
How has the porn industry shaped our view on relationships?
Q. I would like to know woman's view on the porn industry and how it has shaped our view on relationships. Are we being forced to believe that this is the way we should be having sex and to like it? Porn has changed over the last 20 years, the acts ...
A. 14 August 2014: Sounds like you are looking for confirmation rather than discussion. Porn comes in all sort of categories and does not equate solely to men being dominant. That fills the gaps of the taboo fantasies everyone has. Porn has also been in existence ... (read in full...)
What should I do about my boyfriend talking with shady girls
Q. My boyfriend has a history of cheating, not on me but on his one ex. Shortly after he moved schools (we dated for a year back in 9th grade but broke up when he moved) he started dating this girl and they had a very unhealthy relationship. They ended ...
A. 7 August 2014: I do not think there is anything you can do given your circumstances. It also makes no sense to question things NOW after deciding to go back into a relationship with him. I think your focus should be on the baby instead rather than his sex drive. ... (read in full...)
Are we crazy for moving in our son's girlfriend, to help keep her away from her abusive father?
Q. My wife and I and getting lots of grieve from family friends regarding a decision we made with our only son who ism20. He still lives at home during the summer and goes away ( 1.5hours from home) for school. He comes home most weekends. He has been ...
A. 6 August 2014: I usually take the time to read other comments and answers but I wanted to say something before my thoughts were swayed. God bless you guys for saving this young adult. I wish there were more people like you in this world.
You guys did the righ... (read in full...)
Have I been over-thinking the issues surrounding bringing a dog into our new home?
Q. I really need some advice. This is something I'm getting all OCD about! For my entire life, I have always wanted a dog. My partner and I have a brand new home, we're yet to have children and it just seems like a good time to bring that speci...
A. 5 August 2014: A majority part of life is unplanned. Having a pet is similar to having a child. They are unpredictable and hard to understand. But that is a beauty you can only experience when you embrace it. Of course, you don't treat a dog like a child after ... (read in full...)
He tells me to stop all of this "drama," please help as it's been weeks since I've had proper meal or left my bedroom!
Q. I met this guy a year back and we have been dating...he is very different from the entire world and i can vouch for it...maybe he loves me but i don't really matter to him...he seems like the kind of person who just can't love anyone but himself and ...
A. 5 August 2014: Your actions nor our advice will allow him to change. You are a young adult so perhaps you should seek a better lifestyle for yourself. I do not know why or how things have escalated in this manner but you are clearly not handling this well. Try to ... (read in full...)
My best friendis in love with a guy who mistreats her!
Q. So, my friend and I have known each other for about 2 years now. We're always hanging out and there for each other. However, as long as I've known my friend she's been dating this guy. He, honestly, treats her like garbage. So, my friend has a on...
A. 4 August 2014: There's does not seem like anything you can do at this point. Whatever could be done I am sure you have already said and tried. There is something obviously wrong with your friend but it has been so long I am not sure how they can be solved. Even I ... (read in full...)
I'm a shy, inexperienced, guy.
Q. So let me start off by saying that I am a 24-year-old virgin (sad I know). Anyway, there is this girl at my job that I'm really attracted to, sometimes I think I catch her looking at me (I could be wrong, but having been in a similar sitch before ...
A. 4 August 2014: Just talk to her and get to know her. I don't see what your virginity has to do with anything. ... (read in full...)
I broke up with my boyfriend two months ago. Do you think I overreacted?
Q. Hi Everyone, Thank you for taking the time our to read all this. I broke it off with my boyfriend over two months ago and the thoughts of "did I overreact?" coupled with "I miss him so much" have started creeping in. So, I wanted to get...
A. 4 August 2014: After two months it is easy to look back on the event and think "oh maybe I overreacted". For the sake of argument, you can apply this to most events where anger or strong emotions have taken over.
I think at the end of it all, we just want tru... (read in full...)
She said I didn't get it, she's right, I didn't get it!
Q. Sorry this may be a little long. So last night my gf of almost 2 years and I were fine. We were watching a movie, she fell asleep and I fell asleep shortly after her. We weren't fighting or anything. Then this morning she told me she had a dream ...
A. 3 August 2014: Sounds like she has been cheating on you. Perhaps not in the sense of doing anything physical. It could be an emotional affair or the person that was in her dream is someone who she has interests with. That would logically explain why she went ... (read in full...)
Need tips to help a player boy falling madly in love with me but not handling it well
Q. I am dealing with a man who is having difficulty handling Love and handling it very strangely. I am concerned for his wellbeing. Well I met this guy a month and some days ago who from what I was told by many, he was a bad boy you know AKA player p...
A. 2 August 2014: I don't really understand why you would want to settle down with someone who is unsure about his own worth. I am not particularly fond of rules and games because you can have 100 guys flock around you or date less then 3 people over 10 years and the ... (read in full...)
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