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*henCowsAttack

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What type of condom do you recommend for the first time?

Q.   Hi! So I am a virgin currently. My boyfriend and I are planning to have sex. I'm a virgin and he isn't. My question is: What type of condom do you recommend for my first time? He wants to use fire and ice but I'm not so sure since if it hur...

A.   7 May 2014: Just use a regular condom. To be honest your first time is going to be complicated enough without adding in something like that to the mix. It typically takes a few times before sex becomes fun and pleasurable, plus as you mentioned you don't know ... (read in full...)

Could an attractive real woman make a guy less interested in porn?

Q.   Right here is a question I possibly know the answer to. Lets say a guy likes a lot of porn, glamour mags, sexy photos etc. is here any way him finding a real woman who is attractive in looks and personality can change this or at least lessen it? ...

A.   3 May 2014: Personally I don't think so. Everyone likes to masturbate sometimes, it's just such a therapeutic release, and sometimes we need that release without having to worry about pleasing someone else. Porn is a visual aid for men, and can help make ... (read in full...)

Don't want to seem like a nagging girlfriend. Is my reaction to his behaviour justified?

Q.   My question is brief.......... I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for some months now. I love him and he tells me that too but my problem is i always get jealous when he 'likes' girls pictures or speak with girls on facebook or when i c...

A.   3 May 2014: I was just like you when I was young. It is not a good way to be! Jealousy and anger over just talking to other girls will eventually destroy any relationship you have. Trust me, I've been there. Remember that half the people in this world are ... (read in full...)

The information this man gave me about his past has made me uncomfortable. Should I keep dating him?

Q.   Is this weird? I started dating a man, and we've been on a few dates, I'm still getting to know him. But during the last date he told me that he had been previously engaged to a woman he had dated for almost ten years since he met her in colle...

A.   3 May 2014: The problem here is that we're only getting one side of the story, and the aunts and uncles are jumping to judge based on that one side. My take is, there's much more to the story than meets the eye, and we don't know what that is. I say, keep ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend never invites me to his parties

Q.   Hello all. Well, I have been with my boyfriend for 2 1/2 years and have known him well for about 7 years. Last year he decorated his backyard. I picked out the pool which is the staple of the backyard. I picked out most all of the furniture, ...

A.   3 May 2014: This guy isn't your boyfriend. He's got someone he likes or someone else he's seeing that is coming to these parties. Don't be a doormat. Just cut it off, you deserve respect and love, and this isn't it.... (read in full...)

Which of the two guys should I choose?

Q.   hello, I'm stuck between two guys and I need an advice. "guy no1" is the "good looking", "im perfect" kind of guy and I dislike that but at the same time he doesn't act like that around me, in fact I pushed him away so many times and he still ma...

A.   23 April 2014: How about guy C: none of the above? Don't commit to anyone you aren't 100% into. It isn't about hurting them, it's about each person equally wanting to be with the other. Neither of these guys is right for you.... (read in full...)

Should I get rid of this guy because he seems to be hiding something? I'd love to hear your interpretations of his text messages

Q.   I have had the most awful experiences with online dating, and am really skeptical about every man I meet now. I'm not sure if I'm looking for red flags because I'm so afraid of not spotting them. I've been on three dates with this 29-year-old...

A.   23 April 2014: My two cents- if you have a gut feeling about this guy, don't date him anymore. Us women have this thing called female intuition. We've been unfortunately trained to ignore it. Anytime I've ignored mine, I've regretted it. Trust your gut.... (read in full...)

Has anyone lost the love of their life? Do I keep fighting? And how do I deal with the thought of her with someone else?

Q.   Hi All, Here's my situation that I need advice on: I was dating a girl for around 6 month who I was madly in love with, she was the girl of my dreams, I have never been happier. Then all of a sudden one day she turns round to me and says s...

A.   10 April 2014: Time is the only thing that's going to help you get over her, I'm sorry to say. But you MUST leave her alone. She has made herself clear. She does not love you. You can't make her love you. You probably are appearing pretty desperate to her now.... (read in full...)

Am I being horrible to ask him to get tested?

Q.   What should I do? Why won't he get tested? Am I overreacting? So I haven't being with a guy sexually for 3years now and I've been dating this guy for almost a year now and I want us to start a sexual relationship. He says he hasn't been with any...

A.   4 April 2014: Well, it is possible he has herpes or something, and doesn't want you to know. A shocking number of people dont have outbreaks very often, think they can't transmit it unless they're having one, and don't tell their partners. This WOULD come up on ... (read in full...)

Should I leave this man?

Q.   My husband and I met 6 years ago. He lived in a different State and so we began a long distance relationship. After three months he moved across the country to be with me. Soon after I got pregnant. We really only had been dating for 5 months (3 ...

A.   2 April 2014: I am so very sad for you. We see these stories a lot, but for some reason yours really yanked at my heart. Perhaps it's because I can relate. And now that my kids are older- 11 and 18- they tell me openly about how they used to try to hide fro... (read in full...)

Was there any need for him to send this message to his ex?

Q.   Hello friends. I have been dating a guy from past 10 months. Our relationship was quite good but we had some problem because of his ex. I think he is still in love with his ex. He still have her photographs and messages and still saves some memory f...

A.   2 April 2014: It sounds like he doesn't feel like he had closure. You don't say who dumped who, but if she dumped him it sounds more to me like he's suffering from a seriously bruised ego that he hasn't gotten over. Which of course is his issue. No, there's ... (read in full...)

I found out my boyfriend has been talking to another girl!

Q.   Hey everyone so i've been dating my boyfriend for a little over a year and we live together. back in February we was fighting a lot. It was every single day all day. it got to the point where we really hated each other. In march we fought a lot as ...

A.   2 April 2014: Combo of fighting and being way too young to settle down. I have to ask why you would want to be with someone you fight with all the time? That isn't love, you know that, right? It is also a horrible thing to expose your little one to. Are y... (read in full...)

Can I be happy with a man who isn't funny?

Q.   I’m 31 years old and I’ve been with my boyfriend for over a year. We both feel that communication and respect are most important in a relationship and have many shared interests. My boyfriend is an amazing listener. He’s kind and caring, treats ...

A.   2 April 2014: No honey, he isn't right for you and you'll never be happy with him- voice of experience speaking-... (read in full...)

Can a man control his arousal?

Q.   Ok so my boyfriend and I have decided to get married before sex. This is his decision. I am divorced on my mid thirties and he is on his mid twenties and saids to be a virgin. Well turns out he's religious aswell. When we kiss and fondle heavily , ...

A.   2 April 2014: With all due respect Mr Clark, every gay man I know has has sexual experiences with women, especially those that are closeted. They're often quite vociferous about it, aggressive. Because they ARE in denial. They're "supposed" to be with a woman, ... (read in full...)

Can a man control his arousal?

Q.   Ok so my boyfriend and I have decided to get married before sex. This is his decision. I am divorced on my mid thirties and he is on his mid twenties and saids to be a virgin. Well turns out he's religious aswell. When we kiss and fondle heavily , ...

A.   1 April 2014: Just wanted to throw out something nobody else has yet. He could be gay and very much in denial about it. Religion is great for that sort of thing.... (read in full...)

I'm 25 and afraid its too late for me to find love

Q.   Hey everyone....so it has happened again, broke with my forth boyfriend. It took me two years to get over my third boyfriend but this time we broke up like 5 days ago and I am fine. In fact I am ready to jump back in dating scene. But my worry is t...

A.   22 March 2014: Honey, life is a crapshoot. You are still very, very young. People are settling down later and later these days, many not until their 30s. You have plenty of time. You know what happened to me? After a series of failed relationships I ... (read in full...)

Feeling conflicted about my older LDR

Q.   I have a problem. My boyfriend and I have been together about 3.5 years, and he is 14 years my senior (I'm 22). We got together when I was in my first year at university, and we share the same core values and ambitions. However, he has been unemploy...

A.   22 March 2014: You have exactly two choices here, sweetie. Stay with him and be miserable, and become resentful, bitter, and angry, or break it off and have fun. I highly recommend the latter. Guilt is a very common tactic people use to convince them to... (read in full...)

Should I be upset at my boyfriend for sending my friends on facebook friend request?

Q.   Hello I was wondering am I being silly, jealous or insecure? Should I be upset at my boyfriend for sending my friends on facebook friend request? Is this normal? He doesn't know them and I dont see the point.But could i be harboring feelings of ...

A.   21 March 2014: Well, it's a little silly to be jealous over it IMO. My greater concern would be the possibility that he's doing it to keep tabs on YOU. I agree it's a little odd, I'm just reading a different possible motive than you are.... (read in full...)

Her male best friend is making me feel uncomfortable

Q.   My girlfriend has a male best friend, they have been friends for years, he has a romantic interest in her, however she said she was very clear with him about she wants to be with me and not with him. They go out together for lunch, to the movies and ...

A.   19 March 2014: Nothing good can come of you trying to prevent their friendship. I too,have a male best friend that I go do many of the same sorts of things with him. I adore my husband for trusting me completely and not being at all threatened by it. Especial... (read in full...)

Have any women on here gone to a bar alone?

Q.   I have been on my own for a long time now. It has been bothering me for a while but it has only become a problem recently. I don't have particularly great coping skills and feelings of loneliness have become overwhelming. I really need to make some ...

A.   15 March 2014: Oh, geeze. Very dangerous, folks? Maybe if you're going to a meat market alone in the middle of the night, getting sloshed then staggering out to your car. I've been to bars alone many,many times. Sometimes for the great lunch specials, sometime... (read in full...)

He might have called out another name, I'm not sure!

Q.   I've been with my boyfriend around 3 1/2 years. Last night we were having sex [Mod note: overly graphic details removed] he was seeing *everything* up close and personal so there was NO way he could have mistaken me for someone else. He was ...

A.   10 March 2014: Yup, plenty of people get tongue twisted. I did it with my husband once, during sex, and it was an ex I hated but that I spent three years with. Fortunately my husband is an awesome, laid back guy who did not overreact. He laughed it off. Even ... (read in full...)

I've never had a bj to completion, should I try with this guy?

Q.   I am a 30 year old straight/bi curious man and I have never gotten a blowjob to completion. The woman has always stopped before I orgasm. I have the oppportunity to let another man give me a bj to completion. He wants to in the worst way and I am ...

A.   10 March 2014: Refreshing. So many men are bi or bicurious and afraid to admit it, even on the internet. Agree with the others, as long as you wouldn't be cheating on someone, go for it.... (read in full...)

I'm the 30 year old virgin and don't want to be the 40 year old!

Q.   Dear Cupid, I'm 31 and still single and I don't want to be the 40 years old virgin. It's not like I haven't been trying. I took other people's advices, read books, I even tried using those cologne that makes a person likes you. But none of t...

A.   4 March 2014: Some people are probably going to disagree with my advice, but at your age it is possible that seeing a sex worker could help your self esteem. There are sex workers that specialize in all kinds of things. Some for people with disabili... (read in full...)

We've been talking on the phone for 6 months, dating for 5 weeks, we are a perfect match and he has asked me to move in with him!

Q.   I was speaking to a guy on the phone for about 6 months, he always asked me out on a date but going from his picture he wasn't my type. Then my car blew up and he said he knew someone who had a golf so 1 afternoon my mum and 1 went up to see it and ...

A.   25 February 2014: It's a huge risk. I made that mistake a few times when I was younger, and it was truly a mistake. HOWEVER, I also met my husband at the age of 41, and we both knew within weeks that it was meant to be. Moved in together after 8 weeks, five year... (read in full...)

Boyfriend cannot express his emotional needs and its driving me away!

Q.   I have been with my boyfriend for a few years but have only recently lived together. Up until lately we have been doing very well 99% of the time. We have strong feelings for each other and are an ideal couple. I am 28 and he is a few years youn...

A.   23 February 2014: Sounds like you are trying to get him to change something that's a pretty basic part of his nature. This never works. I do agree with you that your constant feelings of disappointment won't change, and it can't feel too good from his end eit... (read in full...)

I'm scared he will get drunk and cheat on me.

Q.   I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 10 months. We moved in with each other after 2 months. I'm really worried about the relationship. He's a good lovely person but my gut feelings lead my to think otherwise and horrible things. ...

A.   21 February 2014: Smoking is the hardest habit to break. I've been a smoker for years and I will tell you right now, a screaming crying partner would make me want to sneak off for a smoke in the worst way, and yes of course I'd then lie to not have to listen to the ... (read in full...)

How do I get an aggresive suitor to back off a little without chasing him completely away

Q.   This year, I told myself and God that I am going to get married. I don't have a boyfriend yet but just dating. I went to Dublin to see my ex December and even though the long distance is still an issue we are still very hopeful. Then when I came bac...

A.   21 February 2014: Cut off contact with this guy, end of story! And I have to tell you, if you're bound and determined to get married this year, you're going to end up with a substandard partner and miserable. Please, promise yourself "and God" that you wont ju... (read in full...)

My ex who tried to ruin my relationship has contacted me. I don't want to hurt her, but I don't want to hurt my partner. What should I do?

Q.   Me and my ex broke up back in June after being together for a year and a half. We tried being friends but this proved impossible after I started seeing someone four months later. This lead to something of a bitter parting for us. She and her family ...

A.   21 February 2014: Yeah, keep ignoring her. Pity is never a good reason to attempt to remain friends. Don't worry, it is really the kindest thing to do and doesn't make you any less of a nice guy. Do you really want tension with your new girl, over your ex, AGAIN? ... (read in full...)

Does my husband's odd behaviour mean he's cheating or am I being paranoid?

Q.   Is my husband cheating? I woke up this morning to him throwing on clothes in a hurry. I asked him what he was doing. He at first didn't reply and then said he was going to the grocery store and would be back in an hour. Before I could even get out ...

A.   16 February 2014: I don't know about cheating, but that's definitely suspicious behavior. Anything is possible at this point, and it does sound as though he's hiding something. Keep your eyes open, and best of luck. ... (read in full...)

Is there anyone who has a similar job in reception or administration that can give me some tips

Q.   Can anyone give me abit of advice for starting a new job. I know its not a relationship question but its really getting me down. I'm by far a confident person, infact I'm worried that I won't be able to do the job properly and perform as they had ...

A.   14 February 2014: You'll be fine, Darlin'. This is a huge step up from retail. LISTEN. Take notes. Do not ever be afraid to ask questions or admit you don't know something. You will excel at your new job! ... (read in full...)

My girlfriend has a male roommate but the issue was that she lied about it!

Q.   When girlfriend was moving to college, she had to pick a place/apartment in consensus with her parents. I always got a bit nauseus before that, when thinking about possibility that she might get a male roommate. Somehow, instinctively, I...

A.   12 February 2014: Oh dear God. I'm a 44 year old woman, and my favorite roommates ever have been male. Never had one act inappropriately. Never had one hit on me. They don't borrow your clothes, they don't borrow your makeup, they're great at killing... (read in full...)

He chats with a lot of women, I can't help but feel he has an interest in them or is keeping his options open!

Q.   So I've been with my boyfriend for about a year.We have an amazing relationship he loves me I know he does BUT I've recently looked threw his phone and realized he communicates with a lot of women Text,Call, Facebook...its a lot of Mundane daily ...

A.   12 February 2014: Ok, stop. Stop with the lame "I've been hurt in the past" justification for snooping through your current boyfriend's phone. It isn't fair to drag your baggage from one relationship to the next. Plenty of adults have both male and female frien... (read in full...)

Is sex always going to be this uncomfortable?

Q.   So I lost my virginity to this guy I'm sort of seeing it was a mistake and although I wanted it I felt pressured at the same time. Anyway we had sex and it was slightly painful, not all it's cracked up to be and I didn't finish no matter what he ...

A.   12 February 2014: That's very common for a first time. Don't worry. I didn't enjoy it till my 4th or 5th time. That said, if you feel it was a mistake and just felt dirty and sore, you aren't ready for sex!! The sore part is ok, the dirty part is worrisom... (read in full...)

Is it unusual for a man of his age to take lots of photographs of himself?

Q.   This might seem like an odd question, but it's in the context of a lot of other behaviour that I won't go into. Is it unusual for a man in his 30's or 40's to take lots of photographs of himself - I mean lots of him doing activities but a...

A.   11 February 2014: Perhaps the bigger question here is, why do you care so much about these small personality quirks of his? I'll be honest here- I find that far more strange than someone keeping a colorful diary,taking a bunch of selfies, or keeping a childhoo... (read in full...)

I told my boyfriend I only climax occasionally. How do I fix his pride?

Q.   I've been with my bf for over a year, and he's very experienced in bed. I am not. I've only had been with two others before him. He has a very large package and I have always either enjoyed it or have been intimidated by it. He is very thoughtf...

A.   4 February 2014: Skipping the foreplay is a great way to ensure that you won't be wet enough and won't cum often. I'm sorry, he's not great in bed,he's ignorant and the other women were probably faking it too. Lots of women can NEVER cum during PIV sex,but ... (read in full...)

Is there a correlation between a woman's breast size and her partner's use of porn?

Q.   I've noticed that there seems to be a link between women with small chests and them saying their boyfriends watch porn and they don't like it. I want to know is there anyone who is big chested and has a boyfriend who uses porn? ...

A.   2 February 2014: Yup. I'm skinny with huge boobs and my husband loves porn. He's an ass man :-P... (read in full...)

If he loves me why can't he say the words? Should I talk to him about this?

Q.   I've been dating my boyfriend for 3 months. He's absolutely wonderful and we spend as much time as possible together. I sleep over 4-5 times a week. Pretty much been playing house. Clean house, home cooked meals etc. but besides that we genuinely ...

A.   29 January 2014: Nope, too early for pressure. It just takes some men time. Felt the same way as you early on in my relationship, in fact he brought it up first. But, it turned out that he did feel weird saying it at first. I left it alone and didn't say it much at ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend's strange behavior when we are out in public is starting to bother me

Q.   I've been seeing someone that I quite like but his behaviour is also beginning to worry me. This might seem an odd thing to bring up but, whenever we are out and he starts to feel really happy with me, or happy in himself, he becomes kind of ...

A.   23 January 2014: I'll be honest here, he sounds like a lot of fun to me! But I enjoy that sort of personality. It sounds to me like you two just aren't a good match- after all, what are you going to tell him? "I wish you'd quit having so much damned fun when we go ... (read in full...)

Is being in love meant to be difficult?

Q.   Hi everyone I have had, in the past, many abusive relationships. I have suffered from anxiety and agoraphobia (still suffer but I am very positive and proactive) and I haven't had an easy life but the good thing is that I am strong despite a...

A.   23 January 2014: Seems to me that he's trying to be smart about his finances so he can dig himself out of that hole from his prior marriage. If that's a dealbreaker for you, then so be it,but would you rather have him shower you with gifts and dinners and have ... (read in full...)

First time sex and I didn't bleed... should I see my gyno?

Q.   Please i need an explanation i just had sex with my fiance for the first time,and he knows i am a virgin but the problem now is i didn't bleed at all just excruciating pains...please i don't know if that is normal or should i see the gynocologist ...

A.   22 January 2014: Honey,you're fine. I really didn't bleed either, just pain like you said. But if you're feeling afraid, absolutely go see your gyno, just for peace of mind. It won't hurt anything. ... (read in full...)

Her training to fight makes me feel insecure.

Q.   I'm in a fairly new relationship with a woman I adore. Our courtship lasted a bit long but we didn't want to get into a relationship just after a few weeks of admitting we liked each other. After a little over a year, we became happily official. T...

A.   22 January 2014: You know what? I actually understand your insecurity. Gentle or not, you're a man, and seemingly your woman is "tougher" than you. This IS an unusual sort of gender role reversal, and maybe it subconsciously makes you feel a little inadequate or ... (read in full...)

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