I don't know which to choose but I do want one of them
Q. I don't know what to do , there's 2 guys that like me and I like them they are both very different from each other with their personalities. If they were moulded together they'd be perfect for me. Ok so ill call them a + b . A is older quieter n ...
A. 14 December 2014: Sorry, neither. I hear NOTHING about how much you enjoy their company, how good you feel in their presence, how much you have in common or how well they treat you, let alone any mention of love.
Settling for the sake of settling is no life to ... (read in full...)
He constantly takesdigs at me.
Q. I met this guy at work who is a few years younger than me. At first i didn't particularly like him as a person as he seemed quite immature and arrogant but over time i warmed to him a bit. He has since left but gave me his number and we've been t...
A. 13 December 2014: Ugh, I wouldn't want to interact with him. What a douche. Weirdly, it reads to me like he actually has some kind of thing for you and a 12 year old mentality of dealing with it. Immature. He'd probably be abusive if you did date him.
Yup, cut cont... (read in full...)
Why does this man give me the silent treatment? Why not just tell me what is wrong?
Q. I have been seeing this man for 3 years now. A few months ago he got really upset with me and wouldn't talk to me for a month. Finally, we talked and began seeing each other again. Now, the same silent treatment is happening, and he has blocked my ...
A. 12 December 2014: Hmm, you call and text A LOT, and he ignores you and you get mad.
Were you calling and texting while he was at work? In the shower? Asleep? Out with friends, at the movies, etc? How much time would elapse before you would get mad? Is it possible... (read in full...)
I found a teen porn web site address in my husband's phone. What should I do?
Q. I have been married for 2 years and have just found a note in husbands phone with a porn site (it was in a notes app and looked like he cut and pasted the page). I understand men sometimes like to look at porn but the title of the porn site was teen ...
A. 12 December 2014: Ah, yes, the good old teen porn.
I don't believe him, either. He clearly looked that up on his own.
A couple of observations. First, that genre is big business. It's amazing how many men are into it. Even older men, which thoroughly gross... (read in full...)
My period was late and it's lasted longer since I gave up my virginity
Q. I Have a question. i usually get my period for 4-5 days and i lost my virgnity one day before my period. it was late by 2 days and now im on my 7th day of my period. What can this be?...
A. 11 December 2014: I don't know, you need to make an appointment with your gynecologist. ... (read in full...)
Do my feelings matter? Do I have to accept this?
Q. Do I have to accept my husband looking at porn . I have told him before that it makes me feel compared and ugly whe. He is constantly looking at perfect porn star bodies. He says he loves me but that doesn't take away the hurt. I read lots of posts...
A. 11 December 2014: It is true, most men like to look at porn. It is also true that it is generally harmless. My own husband enjoys it, and it doesn't bother me.
That said, what you're describing doesn't sound like ordinary porn use. Your word choices such as that ... (read in full...)
His mothers engagement ring never feels like my own?
Q. I got engaged last August, his mother died a year beforehand he said he will give me her ring but i never felt 100% happy with it as i never got to see it till i got engaged. The ring keeps slipping off and when he tries it on my finger he says its...
A. 11 December 2014: The larger question is, why are you marrying someone that you fight with constantly?
Do you really want to spend the rest of your life fighting with the person who is supposed to love you the most? ... (read in full...)
My Husband is Touchy with another woman.
Q. I have been married to my husband Ray for 5 years and we have been going to a dance class, we get to switch partners which I have no problem with, but Ray seems to go out of his way to touch this Stacy when there are times that don't have nothing to ...
A. 10 December 2014: Um, yes, you obviously ARE jealous. Which is ok to feel, but please do admit it.
I doubt it is anything serious, I certainly touch and hug my own male friends and mean nothing by it.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has no time for me and calls me terrible names
Q. Hi, everyone, hope your day is going well. I have been with my boyfriend for two months now. He lives an hour away, I drive to see him just about every weekend. When I go all he wants to do is play video games. So, for hours I just sit there and ...
A. 9 December 2014: Uh, why haven't you dumped him? And how can you love someone you've only been with for two months who calls you horrible names? That isn't love. Are you sure you know what a loving relationship is? ... (read in full...)
I want to initiate contact!
Q. I go running at the park nearby. There is a guy who has shown interest in me multiple times. I am also somewhat attracted to him. I have never spoken to him but he must be married and in his late 30's or early 40's. I am also married and I will turn ...
A. 9 December 2014: Sure, if you want to throw away your own marriage and ruin his, too.... (read in full...)
I don't want to hurt his feelings but I don't intend to have sex with him again
Q. I feel bad about this whole situation. I have a friend who is 11 years younger than me. I was actually friends with his older sister long time ago, but we lost touch and with him kept in touch through emails and FB. I didn't see him for 15 ye...
A. 8 December 2014: Dear god, why did you not tell him to get his hands off of you? You do realize you are not obligated to let him grope you, right?
You also don't have to accept any more invitations. In fact, knowing how uncomfortable you are I'm perplexe... (read in full...)
Am I reading too much into a pic I found of my guy with a girl?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for 8 months and we spend as much time as possible together, we get along, have fun, cook together, chat and always kiss and cuddle, it's great. However, a few months ago I found him on various sexual websites, dating...
A. 6 December 2014: He couldn't cheat even if he wanted to?
What kind of garbage is that? ... (read in full...)
I caught my girlfriend wearing sexy bra & panties...cheating right?
Q. My girlfriend of two years came home from work and was undressing out of her work uniform when I walked into our bedroom and saw that she was secretly wearing sexy lace bra and panties under her work outfit. I never saw or got her the sexy panties ...
A. 4 December 2014: Dump her.
She deserves better than you. ... (read in full...)
Can males and females really just be friends?
Q. This seems silly, but I honestly wonder this. There was a few posts on a social media site that claimed while females will look at a male as just being a friend, the same is not true for the male. The male, supposedly, almost always has some level ...
A. 4 December 2014: Of course they can.
Those that say they can't are, frankly, dogs. ... (read in full...)
I think I'm bisexual and I hate myself for it
Q. I recently discovered that I am bisexual. I'm a 16 year old male. I feel like I am a straight guy trapped in a bisexual guy's body. I don't think I was meant to be this way and it makes me sad because I don't accept myself at all. I hate myself ...
A. 3 December 2014: There is NOTHING you can do to stop your urges. If you don't want to act on them then don't, but you can't change your own sexuality, millions of people have made themselves miserable over trying.
Best to make peace with these feelings. I person... (read in full...)
How do I find someone to help fulfill my fiance's fantasy?
Q. My fiance and I have been together 4.5 years. We are very secure and loving toward each other and I don't see that changing at all. However, he's got a fantasy that he kind of wants to fulfill before we get married and has told me that he wants me ...
A. 3 December 2014: I reread your post and I have more to add.
You say you are completely comfortable with it, then in the very next breath say you are nervous and uncomfortable. You say you used to be against it, but now you realize it "might" be kind of fun. You... (read in full...)
How do I find someone to help fulfill my fiance's fantasy?
Q. My fiance and I have been together 4.5 years. We are very secure and loving toward each other and I don't see that changing at all. However, he's got a fantasy that he kind of wants to fulfill before we get married and has told me that he wants me ...
A. 2 December 2014: There is a name for the kind of girl you are looking for, and it is called a unicorn. They are called unicorns because there are very, very few women that are actually willing to jump in to this sort of thing with an existing couple, especially for ... (read in full...)
Can I stop her retro-jealousy? How and what can I do?
Q. For starts I'm lesbian. I lost my virginity to my girlfriend 4 years ago. Before we broke up in 2012 I made her aware of her being my first n I'd do anything to save the relationship. The relationship ended in Dec 2012 despite my efforts. So I...
A. 2 December 2014: Nope. She has to be the one to realize she has a problem and work to get over it.
The more you try to reassure her and try to prove your loyalty, the worse she'll get, and you will find yourself more and more controlled by her jealousy.
I'm ... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend bisexual?
Q. I've been dating this super amazing guy for almost a year now. We both want to get married and were both looking for stable relationships. I ask every man I date if they've ever had any homosexual experiences. I usually ask in the beginnin...
A. 30 November 2014: Well, why ask for advice if you already know the answers?
Of course you have the right to choose your own sexual partners. What you don't have the right to do is shame and humiliate someone who shared something so deeply personal with you.
... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend bisexual?
Q. I've been dating this super amazing guy for almost a year now. We both want to get married and were both looking for stable relationships. I ask every man I date if they've ever had any homosexual experiences. I usually ask in the beginnin...
A. 29 November 2014: Dear God, that poor man! How would you like it if he shamed you over your past? People like you are the very reason men are ashamed to admit ANY attraction to other men, EVER.
And why does it bother you so much, anyway? My own husband has had ... (read in full...)
How do I heal after all his emotional abuse?
Q. I recently broke up with my husband. He manipulated me for years, but it was so cleverly done I didn't realise. It's only since we split up that I realised. He spent 12 years making me feel bad about myself, and in the end I couldn't answer the door ...
A. 29 November 2014: Why are you still in contact with him? The biggest problem I see is that you refuse to answer the phones or open your curtains- unless, apparently, it's for him.
He is still victimizing you. You need interaction with others, positive ones. So... (read in full...)
I know that my boyfriend didn't do anything wrong but just running into his ex ruined our night and his behavior didn't make things any better
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for over 4 years. 2 girls before me, he dated a girl for around 3 or 4 years. They've been broken up for over 5 years now. They had an awful relationship where they fought, physically and verbally. She pretty ...
A. 28 November 2014: Wow, lady, get a grip on yourself. I could understand your feelings if you were very, very young, but you are a fully grown woman in your thirties.
Why is she even a topic of conversation anymore? How is anybody hating her so much five years la... (read in full...)
How can I make being on top work?
Q. Hi, I have this problem: My boyfriend loves me on top. I don't like it. I get tired and can't orgasm from it - I never had problems achieving multiple orgasms, but when I go that road my whole body spasms and I need him to "carry me through". When ...
A. 26 November 2014: I suggest you have him sit in a firm chair, like a dining chair with some padding for his butt but with no arms. That makes it MUCH easier to be on top as you can use all of your leg muscles- your feet will be on the ground. And he still gets the ... (read in full...)
What's the deal with this girl I met online? Is she pissed at me? Buyer's remorse? Or is it simply a change of heart?
Q. Hey everyone, So, I met this girl on OKCupid. I made a profile with a contrejour picture (basically a picture with the shadow of a person against the sun) and was fooling around with the website. Then we struck and conversation and she suggeste...
A. 25 November 2014: Maybe something has happened to her. Hitchhiking? Really? ... (read in full...)
Why would you leave the best relationship you ever had over a surmountable problem.
Q. Hey guys, This past Friday my boyfriends of a little over a year broke up with me. Despite my embarrassing pleas he would not reconsider. The reason he gave for the breakup was that despite my having been the best girlfriend he had ever had and...
A. 25 November 2014: That would be a dealbreaker for me, too! I hate fighting, my husband and I only argue (wouldn't even call it fighting) once or twice a year.
A relationship where you are "fighting a lot" isn't a good relationship at all in my opinion, it is broke... (read in full...)
Is it inappropriate to ask a guy to take an STD and HIV test before we date?
Q. Dear Cupid, I haven't dated in a long time but I decided if I should date again would I be wrong to bring up front about taking STD and HIV test.My health is in great condition and I want the same for the new guy.Thanks ...
A. 25 November 2014: Not before the first date, lol! Get to know him and when the conversation turns to sex and it seems you might be compatible, then go for it! ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my new partner I want to be tested for STI's?
Q. Hello, I have recently entered a new relationship after being in a previous relationship lasting roughly a year. My last relationship ended because of lots of trust issues. Anyway I want to go to a sexual health clinic and get tested for STIs. I ...
A. 25 November 2014: Tell him you want both of you to get tested, as you should have before you had sex anyway.
Getting tested with your new partner isn't something to be ashamed of, it is the responsibile thing to do.... (read in full...)
Extreme jealousy- Do I need help?
Q. I've been having trouble with extreme jealousy in my relationship which is gradually getting worse. It's mainly things like when I'm watching TV with my boyfriend, and something remotely sexual appears (e.g a naked woman or something even as normal ...
A. 24 November 2014: I don't know. I was the same way when very young. A combination of lots of positive self talk and...I dunno, just growing older and wiser took care of it.
I will say this: stop, stop, stop bugging the poor guy about women on TV. He sounds like he ... (read in full...)
I found out my wife worked as a prostitute
Q. I got married 6 months ago. After marriage i found out my wife i Was a prostitute im just shell shocked. I dont know how to cope with it? Im just gone mental. I told her how treeible im feeling roght now and i told her to end this marriage...
A. 22 November 2014: If you love your wife, I think you should forgive her. ... (read in full...)
We have a great sexual relationship but she will not touch me below the belt!
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together for over a year we have a great relationship we started out as best friends grew into a sexual relationship, talking about marriage kids I will 9 yards. Let me start by saying I'm 34 years old she's 10 years my ...
A. 21 November 2014: I don't think it is a matter of attraction. Sounds like she has some very serious underlying sexual issues. Therse can have a number of causes, such as religious guilt, past sexual abuse, or some sort of other fear.
The hard part is going to... (read in full...)
I'm shattered, horrified,torn apart because my daughter just told me she's a bisexual
Q. Hi, I'm shattered, torn apart. I can't seem to function. Just caught my daughter kissing a girl. Horrified, livid. I can't seem to accept my 16 yr old daughter telling me she is bisexual. I'm still 2 days later so angry wth her, calling her so ...
A. 21 November 2014: Wow! That's horrible. That poor kid. She is your daughter, why would you not just love her for who she is? Why is it so horrifying? Also, are you aware of how many MILLIONS of teens experiment with people of the same sex, then end up happily married ... (read in full...)
How can I get myself to squirt?
Q. Hey everyone.... So this is rather a different question but I need some advice. Ive been wanting to squirt for the longest time, and I believe I did so tonight. I followed some tips, and when I did orgasm I pushed out instead of holding back. I felt ...
A. 20 November 2014: You just have to be patient and keep practicing. Sounds like you almost got it! Keep doing what you are doing, making small adjustments as you go. ... (read in full...)
Didn't expect the father's reaction when I told him about the baby
Q. I had a baby in September. i had gone through my entire pregnancy without telling anyone i was pregnant. in retrospect, it was kind of a bad idea but in my defense, i was terribly confused and overwhelmed. once i had the baby, my family became i...
A. 20 November 2014: It is offensive that people are telling you that you need therapy? Why did you ask for advice if you are only going to get angry about answers that you don't like? That you are SOOOO offended shows me that on some level you know it is true. And yes, ... (read in full...)
He pulls the disappearing act but gets upset when I do it.
Q. My boyfriend of 2 years has made it clear he doesn't like it when I don't answer his calls or text back right away. However, he has previously gone out drinking all night and failed to tell me and I'm left wondering when he goes MIA for hours. L...
A. 20 November 2014: I don't know. Do you live together? If so then I can understand this attitude as a matter of common courtesy. Some people in long term relationships, though, live apart because they want their own lives and value their free time. It doesn't seem ... (read in full...)
Didn't expect the father's reaction when I told him about the baby
Q. I had a baby in September. i had gone through my entire pregnancy without telling anyone i was pregnant. in retrospect, it was kind of a bad idea but in my defense, i was terribly confused and overwhelmed. once i had the baby, my family became i...
A. 20 November 2014: You have made some poor choices. Out of fear, you concealed a pregnancy, not only from him, but apparently from everyone who loves you.
Honey, you need therapy. His reaction of shock is completely normal. You hid this information from him unti... (read in full...)
My current boyfriend can't seem to stop looking at dirty magazines despite knowing how it makes me feel!
Q. Dear cupid, I have been in my relationship for 16 years. I have 2 kids with this man and 2 from my marriage. My current boyfriend can't seem to stop looking at dirty magazines despite knowing how it makes me feel. I have explained my feelings to him ...
A. 19 November 2014: Magazines? Doesn't he know he can watch all the porn he wants on the internet for free?
Maybe you shouldn't tell him about it.
Look. I'm almost your age. My husband likes porn. Heck, so do I sometimes. It is clear at this stage that your ... (read in full...)
Why hasn't she told her guy friend she has a boyfriend?
Q. My girlfriend has a guy friend that she has known for two years and they used to like each other she has not told him that she has a boyfriend and she wants to hang out with him alone and won't introduce me or tell him that she has a boyfriend. I ...
A. 19 November 2014: I think it's pretty clear she still likes him and doesn't want to tell him "just in case".
That's my take as a woman, anyway. ... (read in full...)
Liking someone, or liking the idea of someone?
Q. What is the Difference between liking someone and the idea of someone? I've been out with a girl a number of times. I have a nice time with her. I dont feel a huge sense of attraction there, but I do feel the start of a nice warm feeling about he...
A. 17 November 2014: Your heart clearly isn't in this one. At this stage of the game if you two were really compatible you'd be all a flutter. She ain't the one, son! ... (read in full...)
Love him but he's very abusive when angry
Q. I'm on my last bit of hope for my relationship. I have been going out with my boyfriend 2 years and like any relationship we have our ups and downs. I figured out pretty soon in the relationship that he was very verbally aggressive in arguments and ...
A. 17 November 2014: Nothing.
There is NOTHING you can do to stop this guy from abusing you. As long as you are together, he is going to continue to abuse you, and it will get worse and worse until he really hurts you someday.
Sorry, toots, those are the facts. T... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has only read about 50 of the 200 posts in my blog. What does this mean?
Q. I'm a writer who has a blog. It's a travel blog. I met this guy online about 6 months ago while I was travelling and we wrote to each other back and forth. Back then, he would read all of my posts, and write back with his take on them, what he ...
A. 17 November 2014: He reads your blog!
That's what it means. ... (read in full...)
Should I report this, I don't want to create problems or trouble?
Q. Hi, can I ask a question please? I am currently working as a housing Assistant, my superior is a married man 2x my age, he comes across flirty sometimes and stares at me all the time, like really it has been noticed by others. The other day he ...
A. 16 November 2014: Totally inappropriate! Yes, report him. The man is your supervisor!
I want to know why you think it was ok for this married man to touch you like that? What are you thinking? ... (read in full...)
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