A
female
age
41-50,
*im1110
writes:I was speaking to a guy on the phone for about 6 months, he always asked me out on a date but going from his picture he wasn't my type. Then my car blew up and he said he knew someone who had a golf so 1 afternoon my mum and 1 went up to see it and from then we've been dating ever since. We've only been together 5 weeks but we are a perfect match and totally adore each other. He has asked me to move in with him. what should I do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, PeanutButter  +, writes (26 February 2014):
 It is clear that you must know quite a bit of one another seeing as you have been talking for 6 months but you have only really been dating for 5 weeks - this might be too soon to move in, jumping the gun a bit, but ultimately it is up to you - I personally feel that anything you're going to find out about him by moving in with him, you'll find out now or later when you move in with him and probably not before, so what is the harm?
I met my husband online, talked for months, met him and 3 days after that we were engaged without either of us even discussing it or even a relationship on the phone, it was just right and we knew it.
Here we are 8 years later and it worked for us, so like I said, go with your gut and good luck!
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (25 February 2014):
 You should stay where you are... and tell Romeo: "I rather like things as they have been. I DO like you, however, and would like to continue spending time together.... AND, if, after, say, another 6 months or more, we want to get closer... then let's consider that, then...."
Women who jump in to "living together" situations are at oh-so-much risk that THEY are going to end up "out in the cold"... and the guy is going to continue his life pretty much unfettered.....
Good luck... make a smart choice....
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A
female
reader, WhenCowsAttack +, writes (25 February 2014):
It's a huge risk. I made that mistake a few times when I was younger, and it was truly a mistake. HOWEVER, I also met my husband at the age of 41, and we both knew within weeks that it was meant to be. Moved in together after 8 weeks, five years later he is still my absolute best friend, the undisputed love of my life, and the sexiest man I've ever known. My opinion is that these things depend on a number of factors, for example your level of maturity (age doesn't automatically equate to maturity either), how self confident and independent you are, and your level of experience with previous relationships.Given your question, it seems you have at least some doubts. In light of this, my advice is to take it a bit slower. As I discovered in my 20s, some men who want to move fast do so because they are very controlling. Only when you are 100% sure that this is not the case should you make this move.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (25 February 2014):
 Wait until you have been dating for a year. What's the rush?
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A
male
reader, crushed_by_love +, writes (25 February 2014):
It's way too soon.I know from experience having moved in with my ( now) wife after 6 weeks.That may sound an odd statement bearing in mind that we've been together 25 years but the first few years were tough as we discovered that we didn't really know each other and there was a lot of pain to go through which could have been avoided if we'd kept our separate identities for a bit longer!
The time to CONSIDER moving in is that moment after the initial rush has worn off but you still find yourselves wanting to be together constantly and it hurts when you're not.I can't believe after 5 weeks you'll have reached that stage yet!
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A
male
reader, DragonMan +, writes (25 February 2014):
 Greetings,
I must wonder what is the rush in this situation.
Dating 5 weeks and already asking to move in?
Was this a case of suggestion for the future or a request to move in asap?
If the latter I would honestly wonder why.
Be patience as should he
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2014): I agree with Honeypie. You had better wait a few months; and get to know the guy and what his quirks are.
It's nice you get along; but you are now in the "introductory-stage" of a relationship.
Six-months phone contact means really very little. So you get along on the phone and have nice conversations.That's very nice. That doesn't make a person a compatible mate.
You know nothing about the man, but what you've been told.
You've only been dating five weeks. Don't count phone-time. Phone interaction is impersonal and detached. Chatting over the fence to your next-door neighbor is more personal.
You have yet to learn things about his habits, temper, and his background. That's stuff that comes out over a long stretch of time. He's still pretty much a stranger.
I don't mean to insult you, but I see you are nearly forty.
Age can be a big factor in making people rush into things; because they see time as the enemy. We get tired of waiting for the right person, and we all fear getting older alone. That is more reason to be sensible and deliberate in making wise decisions with your heart. Don't be too eager and desperate to have a man; and throw all caution to the wind. You will regret it. Wisdom is supposed to come with maturing; that also includes patience.
Give it some time and don't act too desperate. Trust yourself and protect yourself. Don't just dive in, there could be a stone just beneath the surface. You could hit your head!
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (25 February 2014):
 I would wait... it's way too soon.. tell him you will consider it after you have been dating exclusively for a year.
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A
male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (25 February 2014):
NOT a good idea. My Grandma told me this when I was 16 years old, and it is the truth… “Come visit me and come live with me are two totally different things.”
When you visit someone or spend time with them, you only see a fraction of their bad habits. Go live with them and those habits become a constant part of your life…on both sides. Right now this new love is so exciting you feel you should be together all the time, and rushing this can cause big problems.
If you really want to live with him, start by doing a weekend here and there. Then a week and so on until you feel that it would really work. It took 6 months, and 5 weeks to get this far, it wait another 6 months and 5 weeks.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (25 February 2014):
 I would wait. Another 6-12 MONTHS of dating before moving in together.
What's the hurry?
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