Please help me, clliquey work colleagues and I'm older, help?!
Q. Whats the best way to work with cliquey work colleagues? Hospital environment, not an office.. Most (not all) younger and will say hi but chit chat/laugh etc with each other and almost ignore you? You try to talk to them, but they often the...
A. 20 December 2012: Hi
Ok so the culture there appears to be for younger employees, in your area anyway.
Are there others in another Dept you are friends with,if so it wouldn't matter if your not in their clique as long as all are professional ?
Have a chat ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend was angry that I was ill and didn't want sex so he left late and left my door unlocked all night!
Q. Dear Cupid, I've been in an exclusive relationship for over 2 1/2 years we are both middle aged, and live in our separate homes, but we spend almost every night together. Last night my boyfriend comes over later than normal because he had a...
A. 20 December 2012: Hi
He was very unreasonable, he wanted sex and when he didn't get it, stormed out.
What do you normally do when you see each other, do you go out together in the evenings ever, do you spend weekends doing normal stuff in the day, shopping or... (read in full...)
Please help me, clliquey work colleagues and I'm older, help?!
Q. Whats the best way to work with cliquey work colleagues? Hospital environment, not an office.. Most (not all) younger and will say hi but chit chat/laugh etc with each other and almost ignore you? You try to talk to them, but they often the...
A. 20 December 2012: Hi
You don't say how long you have been working with them, it takes time to be accepted,whatever the age gap. The only thing by the sounds of it,you have in common, is the job so thats what a chat would be about.
Why TRY to fit in with them,jus... (read in full...)
I'm confused, should I just move on from him or continue to hope for something out of this?
Q. I'll now summarize and update the situation. Please advice where I stand now or should I just forget abt the ass cause nth will come out of it. - met him online, ended up he's cooking dinner for first date at his house. Work caught up that's...
A. 20 December 2012: Hi
Move along there's nothing there for you,he just wants sex.
Also-delete his number so you can't drunk text him again... (read in full...)
Should I be upset about my Christmas present?
Q. Ok... I'm just wanting some opinions. Last year for our first Christmas, my boyfriend bought me some electronics. such as a DVD player and a Nintendo wii. (which was nice of him.) I know it was the thought that counts, I am more of a romantic person ...
A. 20 December 2012: Hi
Most would be over the moon if a boyfriend was this generous.You did tell him not to get you anything else, after the very expensive phone,so he didn't, he just paid for it,so it was his way of buying the present you had asked for without ... (read in full...)
Her parents are staying with us over Christmas, but I've found she is having sexual conversations with strangers on the internet! Should I confront her now, or wait until her parents have gone? I'm really disgusted and thinking about leaving...
Q. My girlfriends parents are due from overseas to visit and stay over christmas. It will be the third time I have met them and we get on great. I have now discovered my girlfriend is having relationships and sexual conversations with strangers over ...
A. 19 December 2012: Hi
Your girlfriend hasn't considered your feelings so why consider hers? Why have a miserable christmas just to protect her and her parents when you can confront your girlfriend and leave if you want to, before then?
There is never a good tim... (read in full...)
How long does it take to get over someone and is it possible to be friends after a relationship?
Q. How long does it take to get over someone and is it possible to be friends after a relationship? I split up from my ex about 7 months ago but we kept in touch via email (he lives abroad). Even though we both knew (and said) we still loved each oth...
A. 19 December 2012: Hi
This is why it is better to have no contact with an ex after a split. It prolongs the break up and you can't let go properly and move on because they are in your life still. Then there comes a time when one will meet somebody new.
Now you... (read in full...)
I feel like my boyfriend only sees me when he has nothing better to do!
Q. I am 27 and have been with my boyfriend for 3 years. The problem is it seems like he only sees me when he has nothing better to do. I cannot get him to agree to do anything at the weekends because he wants to wait to see what else is happening, plus ...
A. 19 December 2012: Hi
He doesn't sound like he is making you a priority in his life and to be honest,after 3 years it should be 'going' somewhere by now.You don't mention moving in,engagement or even wedding plans so I assume its a stalemate now.
I would sit h... (read in full...)
Will my friends ever accept us as a couple and stop the snide remarks?
Q. Just over a year ago I was in an 'open' relationship with my now ex-girlfriend. We both saw whoever we wanted to no questions asked. It worked for about 2 years Last December I started seeing a girl who was a friend of both of ours and our group of...
A. 19 December 2012: Hi
Well as you have known her a year and been committed for about 9 months I would have thought they would see your serious about your girlfriend.Now she's pregnant and your still there and clearly happy and kmow what you want.
Perhaps they ... (read in full...)
He broke up with me, then got upset at me joining a dating website, so he joined the same site. What do I make of this?
Q. He dumped me just over a month ago, out of the blue. we were serious and talked about a future. He said he wanted to be alone, not date anyone and focus on his kids. Since then I have told him how much I love him and want to work it out. He has r...
A. 19 December 2012: Hi
It IS hard I know, but your doing the right things and friends are invaluable at this time.Wish you luck and in time happiness with a man who deserves you.... (read in full...)
Should I reply to my old friend, who sided with my ex during our messy split?
Q. Dear Cupids, I've been with a guy for 5+ years: as a couple we used to hang out with this other couple- they were originally friends of mine and I introduced my ex to them. Okay, so about a 1.5 years ago my ex and I went through a horrible break-up...
A. 18 December 2012: Hi
I would sway towards ignoring it, for now anyway. Its hard for mutual friends when couples break up, especially when there's a third party involved. They would side with who they saw was the hurt one.
Maybe she has gone past that now,your ex... (read in full...)
He broke up with me, then got upset at me joining a dating website, so he joined the same site. What do I make of this?
Q. He dumped me just over a month ago, out of the blue. we were serious and talked about a future. He said he wanted to be alone, not date anyone and focus on his kids. Since then I have told him how much I love him and want to work it out. He has r...
A. 18 December 2012: Hi
How on earth did he know you had joined Match dating site?
Block him and forget him, he finished it so your free to do as you please,he cant just switch you on and off,its not fair.
I would focus on friends,family and other... (read in full...)
Her kids are treating me like a Dad.. But I don't see this relationship as being forever. Am I looking into this situation too much?
Q. Soooo im just gonna get straight to the point here. I met a girl about 5-6 months ago, went on a few dates and we got on very well. About a month into seeing her she tells me she has 3 kids, 4, 6 and 8. Now at the time this didnt bother me, ive...
A. 18 December 2012: Hi
Your being very adult about this situation.You can see her children are getting way too attached and don't want this to happen.Thats putting her children before you, which is good.
If you really can't see the relationship going anywhere l... (read in full...)
He dumped after he was the one texting another girl
Q. My ex boyfriend (just) dumped me on Monday. The story is that over a week ago I found texts on his phone to a 17 year old girl he works with (he's 30) saying things like I would prefer to be on a date with you, I can't wait to see you again and that ...
A. 18 December 2012: Hi
You were definately right, he did lie to you, I would be grateful he has gone. Him storming out,his behaviour and refusing to show you the messages, says it all.... (read in full...)
Does anyone else here feel small because they don't look as glamourous as pornstars or glamour models?
Q. Does anyone else here feel small because they don't look as glamourous as pornstars or glamour models? I feel like I'm helpless, my ex made me feel like this. We were on about glamour modelling, he said something like do you think you could be one, ...
A. 18 December 2012: Hi
I know a couple of girls who did some Glamour modelling for a lads magazine. When I saw the photos I barely recognised them,by the time the hair,make-up,spray tan and ofcourse the air brushing had been done they looked totally differen... (read in full...)
Massively stressed out about taking a test for a new job....help!
Q. So tomorrow I have this huge test: it's an exam in order to get a super awesome job (actually if you pass this test, you get the chance to have an interview for the job). Loads of people are taking this test and only 35% of them passed it today. A...
A. 18 December 2012: Hi
Congratulations !
And Happy Christmas... (read in full...)
Stuck in a cycle of loving and loathing each other. We fight. When is enough, enough?
Q. We have been together on and off for 6 years. We got engaged 6 months ago and things are not good. We don't fight well at all. We both say things that we shouldn't . She keeps telling me she don't have that feeling for me, yet she don't want t...
A. 18 December 2012: Hi
So, you have had an on/off relationship for 6 years,your now engaged,fighting often and there's no sex, she says she doesn't have that feeling for you but doesn't want to break up.She tells you shes sick of you then goes out drinking all hour... (read in full...)
She posts everything we do on facebook!
Q. im with this girl that is say young enough to be my daughter. i love her very much and i even ended a long term marriage for her. but lately i have been thinking about things she put on facebook when we were dating. i told her one night when we were ...
A. 17 December 2012: Hi
No your not paranoid, but you've made your bed now plus have a baby on the way, you'll just have to hope she will change. She sounds extremely immature and plays some very stupid games using Facebook.... (read in full...)
Do I tell my friend that a guy only dated her for a bet?
Q. A few days ago I found out my best friend was a victim of a bet. She dated a friend (let's call him X) of our very good guy friend for like two weeks and then he left her saying he has to focus on school, bla bla, some lame excuse like that. She ...
A. 17 December 2012: Hi
Was in a Bar with a friend one night, a bloke came over asked if I had a cigarette,I said no,sorry. Then another from his group came over to chat to me,asked if I wanted a drink.I thought they were definately wynding me up and just said no ... (read in full...)
Ex was peeing while talking to me?
Q. Ex bf of many years talking to on the phone often. he has now married. the other night i was talking to hime on the phone and he was taking a leak while he was talking to me. Is this a way some married guys get off?? or does he just feel comfortable ...
A. 17 December 2012: Hi
He was just multi tasking, you couldn't see him so it wasn't offensive.
OR he didn't want his wife to know he was talking to you................ (read in full...)
My boyfriend has outbursts of anger but says he's only expressing himself. These episodes make me uncomfortable!
Q. So I asked a question about my boyfriend a couple of days ago. We're on holiday and he was telling me my top was see-through. We got over that and had a really nice day, sightseeing and enjoying our time together. Then yesterday he wanted to go and ...
A. 17 December 2012: Hi
Perhaps you should have offered to go with him the next day initially, if he helped you finish your Christmas shopping that previous day. Its both of your holiday and a time to relax together,so its about compramise.
Doesn't sound a very rel... (read in full...)
Massively stressed out about taking a test for a new job....help!
Q. So tomorrow I have this huge test: it's an exam in order to get a super awesome job (actually if you pass this test, you get the chance to have an interview for the job). Loads of people are taking this test and only 35% of them passed it today. A...
A. 17 December 2012: Hi
In a way the stress is good, it means your serious about the job. If you fail it will bring you down for a while and people will say the usual things to make you feel better, you will get over it and start to look for another job.It doesn't ... (read in full...)
Why is my b/f still active on the online dating site?
Q. Five months ago I met a guy online and we hit off it seems. We are at the stage where while we never talked about being exclusive, I've met his parents and friends and have been introduced as his girlfriend. I've never closed my account at the d...
A. 17 December 2012: Hi
You did right to check him on the Dating Site, you must have had a gut feeling or you wouldn't have bothered.Its not like you accessed his password etc,you just saw what everyone would see.
I do think he is keeping his options open, wh... (read in full...)
Mixed messages from tutor whose behaviour towards me keeps changing. This is the most confusing situation I have ever been in, can you help me figure out what on earth is going on?
Q. Apologies for the really long length of this but I have a question regarding on/off 'mixed message' behaviour going on over a long period of time. I've asked about this before but would like an update please! Please don't judge me as obsessive, ...
A. 16 December 2012: Hi
I would distance yourself, no contact except on a professional level. That way you give yourself a break from him and the distance will help you stop the analysing of this situation and enable you to move away from the focus and the intensit... (read in full...)
Is this normal male behaviour or is he being overly possessive?
Q. My boyfriend and I are on holiday, staying in my friend's apartment. She and her boyfriend live here. My boyfriend got upset with me last night as I came to bed in my pyjamas and he said the top was see-through and he hoped I wasn't letting N (the ...
A. 16 December 2012: Hi
Sounds to me like he simply didn't want to be there and used this as an excuse. Its not normal behaviour no, and as you only wore the pyjamas in the bedroom it shouldn't upset him to that extent.
Does he get along with your friends and how ... (read in full...)
FWB occasionally over si years .What did I do to turn him off so fast? And why build up expectations?
Q. I have a guy who was a friend for a while and became a fwb about 6 years ago. We only would see eachother when not in relationships. I was fine and he was fine and although we have always been attracted to each other, our jobs are different an...
A. 16 December 2012: Hi
Its purely because you didn't chase him like the others,you were very blase about him,so in his head you were a challenge.He thinks he can lure you in and he does.Then, you become just like all the rest to him plus you got cosy with him too,... (read in full...)
Has anyone had a married person leave their partner for them and how did it work out?
Q. Has anyone (or do you know anyone) that has been in a relationship with someone whom is married/living with a partner and that person has actually left their partner to be with you? If so, did the relationship work out or did you constantly doubt if ...
A. 15 December 2012: Hi
I know of two couples, both still together with said partner,they live in fear of one or other leaving but say the mess they created (kids involved) by the splits they have to stay together to justify it.
They are definately the exception th... (read in full...)
How does my friend really feel about me? He rejected me and moved in with his girlfriend, but cant say if he still has feelings for me...
Q. im a bit worried as to how this will get read so please help if you can ok here goes, during the summer i got close to my best friend. we never had sex but kissed a few times. hes in a problematic situation with his girlfriend of 5 years so what hap...
A. 14 December 2012: Hi
So from what you have *heard* from somebody, his girlfriend and him don't sleep together and she is dominant and moody. Now any normal man would not be with her if this was true, why would he get into this situation even without you in the pict... (read in full...)
Stay with my married lover or breakup? He says he doesn't want to lose me and he loves me
Q. Hi All I really need some advice about a married man i have been seeing for years,we are now both in our sixties. I have tried dozens of times to end the relationship but he doesn't want me to and i am truly in love with him,he tells me he love...
A. 14 December 2012: Hi
As you say you have experienced 'horrible lonely feelings because you can never do things together'. Thats the price YOU pay for this *relationship* he has his wife and his other life with her.
Don't waste any more of your time on him, jus... (read in full...)
How do I ask her for her number without getting a bad reaction from her?
Q. Hello I like a girl who is a bit traditional and conservative. I see this girl in the gym almost everyday. For about 6 months or so, I barely spoke to her because she seemed a very quiet type who didn't speak to anyone. About two weeks ago, ...
A. 14 December 2012: Hi
From what you have said she sounds interested, why not just ask her if she would like to grab a coffee after the gym? ... (read in full...)
He doesn't want anymore children and wants me to give this one up for adoption, so what do I choose, being a single mother or giving up my baby?
Q. I need help. Me and my boyfriend of 8 years are expecting again. Unfortunately for me, he doesnt want anymore children. He has expressed this to me before even before our first child, but he knew since I was 11 years younger than him and didnt have ...
A. 13 December 2012: Hi
I agree with 'Iamheretohelpyou'. He needs to have a vasectomy asap and you need to be prepared for the emotional fall out of giving your baby up for adoption.You may well need counselling both before and after.
... (read in full...)
Is he using me? I just don't feel special anymore.
Q. Been seeing a married man, on and off for 4 years...did try ending it but we soon got back together, I guess we missed each other. We are in contact on a daily basis...emailing for hours on end plus texting by phone. Iv never asked him to leave his ...
A. 12 December 2012: Hi
Yes he is using you, you spice up his life add a bit of excitement. Its a habit too,all the contact you have daily and the meetings.Four years is a long time.And seeing as you don't have sex or go to Hotels, it boils down to a quick grope in... (read in full...)
Does he just prefer being married or does he really not know how to behave?
Q. My boyfriend of 4 and half years has been pressuring me to marry him. I have been unsure because we have been making up and breaking up perpetually, over his use of dating sites. He seems to overlook how much it upsets me, even though he doesnt go ...
A. 11 December 2012: Hi
Why on earth would you want to be with a self confessed cheat who is still using Dating Sites?
Run a mile as he is not boyfriend material for any woman and he doesn't give a damn how he upsets you with his behaviour.... (read in full...)
We see each other nearly everyday. Will it ruin the relationship or am I being insecure?
Q. I started seeing this man over two months ago. We have known each other through the gym for about 7 months previous to this. Thing is, Im really afraid of scaring him away. I know he didnt fancy me in the beginning - as he works in the gym, it is ...
A. 11 December 2012: Hi
I don't think you should give up the class, that would give the wrong message, anyway its a class there's not alot of time to chat etc,its not like going out on a date.
If you feel your seeing him too much as in dating time then make plans ... (read in full...)
My 25 year old boyfriend acts like a teenager. Will her grow out of it?
Q. My problem is that my 25 year old boyfriend acts like a teenager at times. He is still very influenced by what his friends think, and because of that he often does things to fit in with them. He is often the drunkest guy on a night out because he ...
A. 11 December 2012: Hi
Sounds like he hasn't left his college/uni days behind him yet, just full on enjoys his space. If he's responsible enough to manage his work and home expenses all is not lost.
I would worry alot more if he was out clubbing every weekend an... (read in full...)
My 25 year old boyfriend acts like a teenager. Will her grow out of it?
Q. My problem is that my 25 year old boyfriend acts like a teenager at times. He is still very influenced by what his friends think, and because of that he often does things to fit in with them. He is often the drunkest guy on a night out because he ...
A. 10 December 2012: Hi
Its hard to say. Life experience and responsibility make you grow up.If you have a job or a home even children your more likely to mature as you should. If someones for example,always lived with parents is long term unemployed, they don't ha... (read in full...)
LDR of 3 years--she sent me fake photos of herself from porn sites! Why did she lie to me?
Q. I feel like such an idiot. I've been in a long distance relationship for more than three years. I'm in the UK and she's in Australia. We met on the internet, but quickly moved on to talking on the phone, and we'd talk for hours every day. For v...
A. 10 December 2012: Hi
Looks might not be important to you but it would be nice to know who your talking to after 3years.Women change their hair etc all the time so its not unreasonable to ask for a recent one and to offer one of yourself.
You seem to have a g... (read in full...)
Why did my ex say all that he did?
Q. I bumped into my ex in a pub yesterday. He told me that he had seen me in another pub earlier that day, as he was walking past the pub at the time, but when he went in that pub later on, i had left. I was surprised that he noticed that i had left. ...
A. 10 December 2012: Hi
He sounds horrible, you should be happy he is your Ex.I would be.
While you have emotions for him still you will overthink everything he says, so just avoid him till your over him.
You'll meet someone eventually who thinks your perfect ... (read in full...)
LDR of 3 years--she sent me fake photos of herself from porn sites! Why did she lie to me?
Q. I feel like such an idiot. I've been in a long distance relationship for more than three years. I'm in the UK and she's in Australia. We met on the internet, but quickly moved on to talking on the phone, and we'd talk for hours every day. For v...
A. 10 December 2012: Hi
Ofcourse it hurts you have invested alot of yourself in her for 3 years. At least its out there now and you have asked for an explanation.And seen her reaction.
Have you ever seen actual day to day photos of her, the holiday snaps,family do'... (read in full...)
Is he genuine? Every time he's 'going to leave her' something comes up. How do get more strength to cope with him?
Q. First of all I know im an idiot for getting myself in this situation and I do regret it more than you could know which is why I could do with some advice. I had feelings for a guy that I've known for a year and stupidly let him kiss me a few mo...
A. 9 December 2012: Hi
Well so long as your prepared to be his 'dirty little secret' he doesn't need to leave her.
Why would you want to be with a man who lies to his partner,lies to you, has sex with you both and goes home to their house. Theres a child in the m... (read in full...)
I know I'm going to break up with him. But am I right to wait until after Christmas? Should I return his Christmas presents after we break up?
Q. Something has snapped in me this week and I have finally decided, after a lot of heartache, that I want to break up with my boyfriend of 2.5 years. He is no longer making any effort with me, and despite me bringing it up several times and him prom...
A. 9 December 2012: Hi
You don't need to explain why your finishing with him. You WANT to finish with him so clearly it's not working.
Do it today, don't spend the next few weeks pretending alls well with him. He can get a refund on the gifts,so can you,thats no... (read in full...)
Why would a guy just disappear? What did I do to make him lose interest when he never even got to know me?
Q. I met a guy at a bar a few weekends ago and we ended up making out. I went back to his place but I told him I didn't want to have sex (I'm not opposed to one night stands but I had my period and I don't like having sex until it's over). He was fine ...
A. 9 December 2012: Hi
Maybe he has a girlfriend or a FWB, the call he to his boss could have in fact been a call to THEM to see their availability.
When you rang him he probably thought 'wahey I am in here' and asked you round, but then you said you would *think... (read in full...)
LDR of 3 years--she sent me fake photos of herself from porn sites! Why did she lie to me?
Q. I feel like such an idiot. I've been in a long distance relationship for more than three years. I'm in the UK and she's in Australia. We met on the internet, but quickly moved on to talking on the phone, and we'd talk for hours every day. For v...
A. 9 December 2012: Hi
The money spent on phone calls and presents could have been spent on tickets to visit............. (read in full...)
LDR of 3 years--she sent me fake photos of herself from porn sites! Why did she lie to me?
Q. I feel like such an idiot. I've been in a long distance relationship for more than three years. I'm in the UK and she's in Australia. We met on the internet, but quickly moved on to talking on the phone, and we'd talk for hours every day. For v...
A. 8 December 2012: Hi
Switch off the PC and start to get over her.She isn't what she seems, at least not physically, so has been a fraud really the whole time.What a waste of your time.Surprised you've never seen her via webcam in 3 years too.
Good luck any... (read in full...)
He doesn't want anymore children and wants me to give this one up for adoption, so what do I choose, being a single mother or giving up my baby?
Q. I need help. Me and my boyfriend of 8 years are expecting again. Unfortunately for me, he doesnt want anymore children. He has expressed this to me before even before our first child, but he knew since I was 11 years younger than him and didnt have ...
A. 4 December 2012: Hi
No way can you give up your baby to strangers because HE doesn't want you to keep it.I wouldn't.Its not a box of chocolates its a child,your baby..Is it what you want?
You two need to talk and fast.
Also IF you stay together one of you... (read in full...)
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