A
female
age
41-50,
*ebecca091180
writes:My boyfriend keeps choosing to hang out with his brother,and leaving me and our 4 month old son at my mothers.What can I do to stop this?He is with his brother more than he is with us..Is it me or is he afraid of bonding with our son?He never helps out with the baby.He doesnt have a regular job because he screwedup and did a drug he gave up 1 and a half years ago...He seems to keep making the wrong decisons...How can i make his see the error of his ways?Is he choosing his brother over me and our son?Me and his brother do not get along...does that have anything to do with? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Rebecca091180 +, writes (23 June 2007):
Rebecca091180 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThankyou for your answer. I need to know what to do about this situation.... He says that I try to lock him down...I say I cant lock you down if your brother already has you locked down...His brother will come over here ,not even knock on the door walk down the hallway and open our bedroom door and tell my boyfriend to come on...and my boyfriend follows him like a lost puppy dog. He hangs out with people he doesnt want to,just because he is with his brother.He does this constantly. His brother pushed himself into the middle of our relationship and I dont know how to remove him. When I became my boyfriend's girlfriend I didn't get with his brother too. I was the only one out of my boyfriend's family that would help his brother when he was in jail...only I sent him comminsary money...and all I can think about is.. this how he is going to repay me..when I was the only one there for him. I am not even married to his brother(my boyfriend). Him and I have been together for 3 years and 3 months. We have a miracle (4 month old)baby boy together. My boyfriend wasn't like this 3 months ago...all of a sudden he changes completely(for the worst) and all I can think about is that his brother is ruining our relationship...Literally I am about ready to pack up his bags and tell him "don't let the door hit you where the good Lord split you"...but then I think about our son and I feel like I am stuck between a rock and a hard place.. I don't know how to get out from under what is covering me. Please help in any way you can...Thankyou for your response. His priorities lye with his brother not with his son and I.
A
male
reader, nologo  +, writes (23 June 2007):
 Your boyfriend has inadequate priorities.
He should be spending time with you now.
From international perspective your case doesn't look typical.
And the point here is that the problem lies in your Community.
"Me and his brother do not get along...does that have anything to do with?" - Both "yes" and "no" are true answers to this.
"Yes" as here is such attitude; "no" as the problem is deeper.
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