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*exilou

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Married to second husband with 3 children with a degree in sociology and psychology living in lincolnshire uk.

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40 years old!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

25 July 2008: Sorry i dont need help just want to share!!! I have had a wonderful day!!!!...

1234567891011Next > [25 pages, 979 answers]

How to handle a penis!!!??

Q.   Hi, I could really do with some help. Any answers will be much appreciated. Well I've had quite a few sexual partners but not very confident in bed. Basically I don't have a clue what to do. For example before sex when me and my fella are just ...

A.   16 October 2008: Be gentle!! Just take it slow, you can ask him if he likes what you are doing. He might say - speed up - slow down or whatever. Double-M's advice is pretty good, he's a bloke after all!! My hubbie likes me to lick his balls and play with the... (read in full...)

How do I improve the taste of my cum?

Q.   How do I improve the taste of my cum? My gf says that sometimes its very sweet and other times it's bitter....

A.   29 September 2008: Ive only had one guy's who tasted foul and it didnt matter what I fed him it was gross!! My hubbies has tasted the same for years - nice and sweet - and he has a very sweet tooth! x... (read in full...)

How do I do the right thing and remain understanding?

Q.   Hi, ive been living with my boyfriend for a year and he is seperated but not divorced from his ex wife. He pays her a huge amount of 'child' support every month and we know that she doesnt spend it all on the kids. She kept the house which is real ...

A.   29 September 2008: At the end of the day the money isnt just to 'spend' on the kids, it should go towards providing a home for them which includes paying the mortgage, rates, providing food, clothing, electricity, heating, holidays, birthdays, treats, school trips, ... (read in full...)

What's the best way to split up when you live together?

Q.   I have been with my girlfriend for over 4 years and we are currently living together. I know that I want to get married and have a family however I know that I do not want these things with her. She is my best friend and has been so since long ...

A.   29 September 2008: I agree if you pack ready make sure you are there to talk to her. Explain to her how you feel and dont let her sway you with tears etc if its what you really really want. The worst thing you can do is just disappear and leave a note x... (read in full...)

Why do his balls disappear when he's erect?

Q.   why do my partner's balls disappear when he is erect. he is 57....

A.   29 September 2008: If my husband is close to orgasm or we havent had sex for more than a week then his balls go really rigid and hard and seem a lot higher and almost like one ball rather than two x ... (read in full...)

Why does my friend hit on every guy I date?

Q.   I have a close female friend--I'll call her "Anne"--whom I've known for about two years. Anne and I get along very well in most regards. Since it's rare for me to find a girl with similar interests, I've forgiven her things in the past that would ...

A.   26 September 2008: I had a friend (so-called) just the like 'anne'. She is jealous of you. She would sleep with guys I was interested in, but I made them wait. Unfortunately some guys just want a quick fumble and she never saw them again, yet I didnt put out and ... (read in full...)

Should I let him follow his dream??

Q.   I met my partner nearly 16 years ago he is married and has two grown up children. We have been together as a couple for nearly 14 years. i have never asked him to leave his wife and never would. He himself came from a broken home and has always said ...

A.   26 September 2008: You are not his soulmate. if you were he would have left her for you. Wake up and smell the roses. Do you really really really believe they dont have sex????????????!!!!!!!!!!!! Come on girl he is having his cake and eating it - move on. You wont ... (read in full...)

I'm wondering what walks of life the aunts and uncles come from?

Q.   Dear posters, I think its wonderful to have people from different walks of life, to be able to come here and look at others situations with a different set of eyes. its great! On to my question, I was left wondering what each and every one of you...

A.   25 September 2008: I am 40 years old, married for the second time to a lovely man with 2 teenagers and a 3 year old. I have a degree in psyhcology and sociology. Currently officially a houswife but also do my husbands accounts. I am learning the piano and this year ... (read in full...)

I really want to buy the right costume for my hubbys birthday surprise. So guys, what really turns you on??

Q.   Hi, This one is just a bit of fun really but it was something i was thinking about as i really want to buy the right costume for my hubbys birthday surprise. Ok, guys, what turns you on the most? 1.Sexy nurse 2.French Maid 3.Police Wo...

A.   24 September 2008: We went to a fancy dress party recently and I bought a vampire fairy outfit, sort of a ripped, tatty skirt with a pvc red and black bodice and long gloves and tatty wings. Ive only worn it once in public but its certainly been worn at least ten ... (read in full...)

Could I have conceived on December 15th?

Q.   If my last period was on November 20-29th(not sure the exact day) and i gave birth on August 19th to twin girls both weighing 6pds, could i have conceived on December 15th? my due date was Aug 27th.I know i need to get a DNA test between 2 men. I ...

A.   24 September 2008: Well all women's cycles are different. If you had your period 20th Nov, had a normal 28 day cycle then a pregnancy calculator puts you due at 27th August so you probably conceived sometime around the 1st week in december. HOWEVER the doctors may ... (read in full...)

I'm embarrassed to wear braces. I need some honest opinions!

Q.   i cant smile because i have teeth missing and out of place. Getting treatment but will take at least 2years. I feel so gutted because realistically how many girls want to date or even be seen with a guy who still wears braces when his aged 18! Come ...

A.   22 September 2008: Its acceptable now for older people to wear braces, I have friends in their 30's wearing them. Stop worrying, if my daughters teeth are anything to go by then you will have fantastic teeth soon, she was told 2 years and it only took 9 months. If a ... (read in full...)

Is it wrong for me to be all anxious about his female friend?

Q.   I need to be calm about this, but it is hard for me. My b/f has a friend (female) who is married, but her husband and she are far apart often because he works several states away from her. But now she has gotten a job fairly close to where my b/f ...

A.   22 September 2008: Turn it round, suggest a nice meal to get to know her better. That way you are round at this place too, make sure you stay overnight! Yes you could try talking to him but if he has had this female friend for awhile he may not understand what your... (read in full...)

I have started seeing a great guy. but my son and mother have a problem with him.

Q.   about 3 wks ago,i started romantically seeing a male friend of 6yrs.so it was AMAZING to start with - the sex has been totally fantatsic, i was always fond of him and he of me but now we are getting really close and we cannot wait to talk to each ...

A.   22 September 2008: Go with your heart. First of all tell your mum you have to be allowed to live your own life. You appreciate her concerns but you are not intending to hurt anyone but feel the timing is right to move on in your life, and if you make a mistake thats ... (read in full...)

How do I get a perfectly shaven vagina?

Q.   This is sorta embarrassing, I feel like I should know how to do this already! Here goes... I have only ever shaved my vagina once. I let it grow right back out and it got all itchy and pretty much put me off doing it again. But now that I'm old...

A.   19 September 2008: Shaving could cause a rash. Waxing bloody well hurts. Careful with creams, do NOT use it too near your opening or on your 'lips' as it really stings!! So you may need a combination of creams and shaving x... (read in full...)

I don't want anyone to know about my previous marriage...

Q.   Unfortunately, I will be getting a divorce soon. I've been married for almost 6 years and my family does not know about it. My family, being my parents and siblings. I wish to keep this confidential, especially to my future gf/fiance/wife. Is this ...

A.   19 September 2008: If you put it on forms the only people who know are the people you give the form too - there is no reason to think your friends and family will find out. I do find it a bit hard to believe you have kept it secret for so long, did you not actually ... (read in full...)

Has anyone ever had a serious relationship develop from a one-night stand?

Q.   I am just curious, has anyone ever had a serious relationship leading to love after a one night stand or sex the first night you've met them? Is it possible for him to respect you after you did the deed?...

A.   19 September 2008: My husband married a one night stand - his ex wife. It was a disasterous marriage as they barely knew each other. He only planned it as a one nighter but she came back for more and he thought, why not, ive just returned from working abroad, have ... (read in full...)

Can guys run out of sperm?

Q.   Hey guys, just wondering if I could run out of sperm after having sex a large number of times in a year/week, I mean, women run out of eggs, but supposudly, a man produces around 2 million sperm a day, but what if you run out of all 2 million? Will ...

A.   19 September 2008: Your body makes sperm all the time so you wont actually run out. it only takes one to get a girl pregnant!! When you are older your sperm count may diminish - or lose quality but that is not something to really worry about yet. If you minimize ... (read in full...)

In-laws from hell - help!

Q.   OK ~ Heres the scoop. Im a guy. I am married to a woman with very wealthy parents. Im not. My 80K an year is a drop in the bucket to them. I, for stupid reasons, had a affair 2 years ago. After my wife moving in with her parents for 7 months, ...

A.   17 September 2008: You hurt their daughter, she lived with them and they saw the pain and tears and helped her mend. Then she takes you back and they went through all that for nothing and cant understand how she could take back a man who cheated and hurt her. Thats ... (read in full...)

I am dating a man, who is ten years my junior, he just got custody of his two undisciplined pre-school kids, I try to help him with them, he also wants me to pay some of his bills, I feel I am being taken advantage of, please give me some advice?

Q.   Hi, please help, im dating a man that just got custody of his 2 kids, they are both preschoolers. The mom died. We had been dating almost 3 months when this happened. We were living in different cities and now he moved to my city. The kids are ...

A.   17 September 2008: Okay so maybe he needs your help at the moment with his children rather than your criticism. If he hasnt been with the kids much prior to their mums death than he wont have had chance to really work on his parenting skills. If he only saw them ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend and I have sex, without using protection, or birth control pills, what else can I do to avoid getting pregnant?

Q.   hi, my boyfriend and I have been having sex for a year and a half and have never used a condom and I am not on birth control. I feel like we are playing with fire and that it is only a matter of time before I get pregnant, but then again maybe I ...

A.   17 September 2008: My ex husband and I used the withdrawal method for years and we werent infertile just extremely lucky. Eventually it caught us out and I got pregnant, even though I didnt particularly want children at that time at least I was married so it didnt ... (read in full...)

I am extremely overweight, after having two kids, would a woman who is 5' 3", and weighs 140 lbs, be attractive to men?

Q.   I am 5'3 and have had two kids. I weigh 140 lbs and i feel extremely overweight. Before i had kids i weighed 120lbs. Do guys find girls attractive who have had kids and weigh 140lbs at 5'3?...

A.   17 September 2008: First of all you are NOT extremely overweight!!! You are just heavier than you you used to be. If you calculate your body mass index for your height and weight you are classed as a healthy 24.5. I have been in your position, at just under 5ft 4 I ... (read in full...)

I'm aware being on the pill is meant to 'trick' your body into thinking it's pregnant, but....

Q.   Hi, Just a quick question here. Might sound silly but I just wanted to know. I'm aware being on the pill is meant to 'trick' your body into thinking its pregnant as such. Does this mean any emotions you experience whilst on the pill, you will be ...

A.   16 September 2008: Being pregnant for me meant emotionally irrational and weepy at times. Being on the pill was worse, like permanent pmt the whole month, I was quite horrible and stopped taking it and opted for the coil instead when I was in my 30's x ... (read in full...)

Why wont my dad listen to me?

Q.   My dad broke his finger...weeks ago. Its still broken, but he wont see anyone about it. Why? He says not much can be done, but i keep telling him he needs to do something about it....still wont, Why?...

A.   16 September 2008: If he goes through pain daily then that would explain about not making a fuss, his pain killers will be taking care of his finger too. I have neck and back problems which I live with daily, my neck is hurting now and I have lived with back problems ... (read in full...)

I don't think I will get over my ex unless I leave our small town. Is it the right thing to do?

Q.   My ex has broken my heart in pieces and I dont know what to do. He split with me for someone else about a month ago and I cant get over it. We werent together long but I really love him and the thought of him being with someone else is tearing me ...

A.   15 September 2008: Yes take this chance. Life is so short we have to seize every opportunity. He is always going to hurt you and will probably pick you back up when he breaks up with his new gf because he knows he can. See this as a new start not a bad thing and ... (read in full...)

I watched porn and got aroused. Then there was all this stuff down below... is it normal?

Q.   I found porn films in my brothers bedroom and I started watching them and got turned on but I had all this white and clear stuff down below and I mean a lot is this normal....

A.   15 September 2008: Its quite normal, you were turned on by the porn and your body responded. Im 40 and find some porn a turn on as long as its not nasty stuff!!!x ... (read in full...)

I can't put my life on hold any longer! I need some advice...

Q.   I posted the following question last week, http://www.dearcupid.org/question/shall-i-go-round-with-some-flowers-and.html I really need some more advice please. I made my gf a college (photomontage) of us both together i spent all week making...

A.   15 September 2008: I agree you have done so much for her and she has not treated you with the respect you deserve. It may be time to let go. You WILL find someone who appreciates the romantic side of you and wants to be with you x... (read in full...)

She hasn't spoken to me or returned any of my calls since she found the porn mag!! What can I do?

Q.   My girlfriend is an ardent feminist who strongly advocates that all women should be totally independent, financially and otherwise. I agree with her but difficulties have arisen lately. Two weeks ago, she found a Playboy magazine in my room and went ...

A.   15 September 2008: By heck those playboy girls have probably got more money than you and me put together. They are not as stupid as some might think but are selling their assets and turning their bodies into goldmines. If they have to sleep with a few men or hugh ... (read in full...)

I'm the only one in my grade with a light moustache and hair on my chin, I feel embarassed!

Q.   im only 13 but i m having hair on my face i have a light moustache and some hair on my chin its so embarassing im the only one in my grade hlp plz...

A.   15 September 2008: Be proud all your mates will be soooooooooo jealous, trust me!! My 14 year old has had bum fluff (as I call it) on his top lip since he was 13 despite being generally not hairy and very blonde. Its recently turned darker and hairier so I bought ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend whom I met online lied to me, it's over but I still care. Your thoughts?

Q.   Ok, I should be old enough to know better but I would like some input please. I have met a very nice man( so I thought) on a dating site. We clicked. It's been 4 months now and for the past month I got a gut feeling. Not a good one. So the one and ...

A.   15 September 2008: Okay one thing I will say is that my sister nearly lost her new guy who she met on a dating site because her ex from same site had her passwords, regularly logged onto her dating site and replied to blokes who contacted her saying she wanted to meet ... (read in full...)

20 yr friendship caught in the crossfire: can I trust to be around the person who played me?

Q.   So here's how it went down for me (skip to the last two paragraphs if you want, they said i had to repost vs re-wording the original). I've had a friend for over the last twenty years. Were both 24 and still living at home (he's my neighbor). ...

A.   15 September 2008: Maybe you have been a little too laid back here and she has 'lost' interest in you. Women like the men to do some of the chasing too you know!! I dont know if you can get that back now but please dont let her interrupt the 20 year friendship you ... (read in full...)

Why wont my dad listen to me?

Q.   My dad broke his finger...weeks ago. Its still broken, but he wont see anyone about it. Why? He says not much can be done, but i keep telling him he needs to do something about it....still wont, Why?...

A.   15 September 2008: Well he is right, unless its a really bad break and hanging off backwards and dislocated they will just strap him up after keeping him waiting for hours and hours and send him on his way. Men dont like to make a fuss when they have a real pain or ... (read in full...)

My ex has me utterly humiliated by revealing intimate details about me and our sex life to... anyone who will listen! How do I get revenge?

Q.   I recently went through a messy break-up with a girl who I'd been dating for two years. After the break up, she started revealing certain intimate details about me to members of my family and pretty much anyone else who'll listen. She's divulged ...

A.   15 September 2008: Turn it round. Laugh it off and tell anyone who will listen that you must be soooo hot if she cant stop talking about the sex. At the end of the day you are no longer together and for some reason she is bitter about this. Move on and forget about ... (read in full...)

I've been refused a transfer - what should I do?

Q.   HI everyone,i am a nurse working in saudi arabia,im devastated by the way things are at this time,to cut a whole story short,i am a hardworking ,ambitious and dedicated nurse,having said so i work in a crazy instituition where u r judged not for how ...

A.   15 September 2008: Just apply independently for other jobs in another hospital/area you maybe intersted in. Or go above her and ask why you are not being chosen. Maybe your AED thinks your a bloody good nurse and doesnt want to lose you x... (read in full...)

Is having sex 2-3 times a week really that bad? How can I get her to stop pressuring me?

Q.   My girlfriend and I have been dating for over a year and our problem is that her sex drive dwarves mine. I do enjoy sex with her but only on an approximate 2-3 times a week basis, and this seems far too little for her. It never really sememed a...

A.   15 September 2008: I went through a stage when I felt ugly and unwanted if my husband didnt want sex every night like I did!! Its normal to have different sexual peaks at different times to each other, she may be peaking right now and you are simply not. Another way ... (read in full...)

Is this bizarre?

Q.   My boyfriend has a very disturbing relationship with his mother, it is a huge turn off.. I mean yes I would like a guy that loves his mother and gets along well with her but my boyfriend is way beyond that extent. I don't mean in a sexual sense, n...

A.   15 September 2008: My kids shared bath water with me when they were little but I dont think any of the older ones, or me, would want to now. It does sometimes seem to be the case of mummy's boy and daddy's girl. In my first marriage my then husband's mum drove me m... (read in full...)

How much do I tell my four year old about the birds and the bees?

Q.   My daughter is 4 years old and starting pre-school this week. I was wondering what she should know about about the "birds and the bees" before she goes to school. I'm not sure what the age appropriate discussion would be. I've done some research ...

A.   15 September 2008: Age appropriate just means you tell them in simple terms. Eg if she asks where babies come from you could say mummy's tummy. If she asks how they get there you could say daddy puts a tiny seed there which turns into a baby or tell her you have ... (read in full...)

How does a player act when he finally falls in love?

Q.   Does anyone out there know how a "player" acts when he finally falls in love? I think I'm being pursued by one who in the past has had women pursuing him. I really need to know the answer to this question because it will help me decide what I need ...

A.   14 September 2008: Players pursue until they get what they want, they will wine you and dine and you whisper sweet nothins in your ear. If you are being cool it will make him chase even more. The only way you will know if he has stopped chasing around and fallen in ... (read in full...)

How likely is it for the morning after pill to fail?

Q.   I, regretably, had unprotected sex. It wasn't planned and I am absolutely terrified of becoming pregnant now. I got the morning after pill the next morning and took it within 10 hours of having sex. The lady told me I should be fine, however I ...

A.   12 September 2008: Okay its not what you want to hear but it did fail with my friend and she followed the instructions to the letter. So for peace of mind do the test or wait to see if your period arrives. It does have a high success rate I just think my friend was ... (read in full...)

Women only, penis question! Would you be ok with 3 inches?

Q.   this is a short and simple question, can a 3 inch penis give a girl a gspot orgasm? and has anyone had sex wit a penis so small? how does it feel?...

A.   12 September 2008: I have had two small men. One was about 3 inches erect and to be honest the first time I thought - oh is that it then. But I loved him and found that if I went on top I could get more pleasure and deeper penetration, and yes I orgasmed, also ... (read in full...)

I need some help with my bikini shopping!

Q.   This might sound like a very stupid question but I'm actually stuck. I went shopping today for a bikini (I'm a happy size 14) but when I tried the bottoms on they were slightly tight, are bikini's meant to be like this or is it when they get we...

A.   12 September 2008: I too lost 2 stone before my holiday so well done. The bottoms go a bit saggy when you get out of the water but dont shrink. Dont feel embarrased asking for a bigger size its about what you are comfy with. Freya do great bikinis in mix and match ... (read in full...)

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