| Latest articles: Are you in a controlling relationship?
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
3 April 2009: i decided to write this article in view of the amount of people that I know/know of who are in unuqual relationships, that is in particular women who are in unequal relationships. Im not sating that it doesnt happen to men, of course, but often it ...
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Why have I never had a boyfriend?
Q. I have never had a boyfriend. I'm not really the type of person to give a shit ordinarily, but in the last few months it has really been bothering me. I'm a bit chubby (size 16) but other than that I don't think I'm overly hideous. I'm a little bit ...
A. 7 June 2011: if its any consolation I have never had a great relationship in my life, and only 1 proper boyfriend who lied constantly to me. I often have the same thoughts and questions as you have written in your letter, and like you I am a size 16. (5 ft 7). I ... (read in full...)
Is it a crazy idea to have a baby at 15? Or a good idea?
Q. im 15 and i really want a baby. i know this is not really the best idea ever but i feel like i was born to be a mother. i have wanted a baby since i was 11 and like the idea of being a teenage mum. i currently dont have a boyfriend so it wouldnt be ...
A. 7 June 2011: a baby isnt a toy. you would struggle to take proper care of a pet at your age, let alone a human being. dont even think about doing it! have you any idea how irresponsible it is to deny a child the right to 2 parents? and whos going to support you? ... (read in full...)
Is it a crazy idea to have a baby at 15? Or a good idea?
Q. im 15 and i really want a baby. i know this is not really the best idea ever but i feel like i was born to be a mother. i have wanted a baby since i was 11 and like the idea of being a teenage mum. i currently dont have a boyfriend so it wouldnt be ...
A. 7 June 2011: a baby isnt a toy. you would struggle to take proper care of a pet at your age, let alone a human being. dont even think about doing it! have you any idea how irresponsible it is to deny a child the right to 2 parents? and whos going to support you? ... (read in full...)
Moving to BF's town- He wants tme to Stay with him - Our culture will not allow our marrage!
Q. I am committed with my boyfriend since 4 months. We both love each other very much and also have trust on each other. But we are of different caste and we know surely that our parents will not allow us to tie a knot, anyway. Now, in this month only ...
A. 5 June 2011: it is up to you if you choose to stay with him, how is your friendship together? aer you happy together? do you both love each other? do you like the same things? how old is he? you must think about these things, people in India have married people ... (read in full...)
I'm scared they're going to think I'm a slut or easy!
Q. I feel like a slut because in drama class these guys I was sitting next to were feeling on my boobs I kinda like it but I kept on her my friend voice in my head telling me to stop so I said do go in there like my shirt but if one did it the other ...
A. 5 June 2011: ehhh how about setting boundaries and not letting others grope you?... (read in full...)
Heroin use during first 3 months of pregnancy... Should I abort?
Q. I am 9 weeks pregnant (my first time ever, and it was unplanned), and I have an abortion scheduled for 5 days from now. Up until today, I was positive I was not going to continue with the pregnancy and was for sure going to get an abortion. Because ...
A. 11 May 2011: ok I'll put this straight abortion is your best bet. seriously, you need to get your s**t together and do something constructive with your life before you have a family. and that means being able to support yourself, without state handouts. this may ... (read in full...)
Pregnant and BF doesn't want the baby right now. What do I do?
Q. I am only 21 and at Uni Bf still has a year or so to go till he finishes. I have just found out im pregnant and wasnt sure whether to keep it but decided to. I thought It wouldnt be easy but possible. Bf has told me he doesnt want kids... not yet ...
A. 11 May 2011: hi I am glad it has worked out ok for you. just remember that you did make the right decision, you have done your best to be responsible and you have given it alot of thought. x... (read in full...)
I can't stop craving a baby! Is there a way to put it on hold?
Q. I have always wanted a baby but it's got to the point where I'm literally craving one. I know this is long but it's the full story so you can give more suitable advice :) Me and my boyfriend are both 17 and although we are young, babies ha...
A. 19 April 2011: not being funny but the best way to stop this overwhelming desire to be a mum is to babysit kids, and to be in charge of minding them when they are at their most difficult. then you will be put off by the constant attention and guidance that they ... (read in full...)
Contraception and pregnancy. How far should one plan for the unplanned?
Q. When you have sex there is no guarantee you will not get pregnant, because even when you do use contraception you can use it the wrong way, and no contraception can claim to be 100 percent safe either. I do trust in the contraception I use, and that ...
A. 19 April 2011: use a condom, and use the pill, each and every time. that way your guaranteed not to get pregnant, with 1 barrier method and 1 hormonal method :-)... (read in full...)
Pregnant and BF doesn't want the baby right now. What do I do?
Q. I am only 21 and at Uni Bf still has a year or so to go till he finishes. I have just found out im pregnant and wasnt sure whether to keep it but decided to. I thought It wouldnt be easy but possible. Bf has told me he doesnt want kids... not yet ...
A. 19 April 2011: helloI just read your question now, Im really sorry that your in this predicament. did you manage to get to the clinic? your boyfriend is pathetic for not even going with you, you are making the right decision. please let us know how you got on!... (read in full...)
Am I immature because I don't have a boyfriend, don't drink or I'm not pregnant or don't have my own house at 17, like everyone else???.
Q. A lot of the girls around here are doing what most grown up's do, like getting pregnant at a young age and having their own house while I'm still stuck at home with my parents. I'm immature because I don't have a boyfriend, don't drink or I'm not ...
A. 19 April 2011: they dont OWN their own houses, they are getting benefits and housing benefit which is not the same thing ! so basically you are talking about careless idiots who get pregnant with thinking about the child, and then expect the government and ... (read in full...)
I don't know who the father is
Q. I am pregnant (8weeks), and there is a possible of 3 people who could be the father. I went to a party and had sex with a mate. The next morning I, again had sex with another bloke (random this time). The next day me and my bf had unprotected sex ...
A. 19 April 2011: no offense but you really should have got the morning after pill, since you were drunk at the party when you had sex. contraception is free in the uk, including the morning after pill, & even if it wasnt free its better spending money on keeping ... (read in full...)
Do you think girls who go with guys to a strip club are trashy?
Q. Guys, do you think it's trashy for a girl to accompany a group of guys to the strip club? I think it's a certain type of girl who is willing to go along on this "adventure," and I dont't think she's the type you wanna bring home to mom/MAKE the ...
A. 19 April 2011: how is there any difference between men going to a strip club and women? if it is a strip club with naked women, and a woman goes with a man, I dont see the problem at all. ... (read in full...)
My parents think I am fat, should I just lose weight to shut them up?
Q. Hello everyone. I hope anyone out there can help me. Ok so i am 20 years old and am at University therefore i no longer live with my parents. I go to the gym almost every single day and work out, and swim, though in the last week i have slacked o...
A. 19 April 2011: you are not fat or even close to overweight, you are slim if anything, but a healthy weight ! it seems your parents may be insecure about their own appearances, or else they are trying to lose weight themselves. in any case tell them you DONT want ... (read in full...)
I'm in a LDR and not sure if he broke up with me!
Q. Dear cupid Me and my bf are dating for the past 6 months and we were friends for an year. I am in a different country now cause of my job, would go back to my home town within 2-3 months. My bf is in my home town. I moved to this new place a mont...
A. 3 September 2010: it sounds like he cant be bothered to make the same effort that you are making. I would be quite annoyed aswell, I would say just ignore him for now and if you still dont hear from him in a week then tell him what you think of him. asking him to ... (read in full...)
Update for pregnant by my old flame results for my sins
Q. I am the one who posted pregnant by my old flame in late march some updates for you who may remember I chose to have an abortion I was 3 months pregnant I could not tell my live in boyfriend of 5 years that I have been messing around with my old ...
A. 6 May 2010: dont tel either of them but DO get some counselling so you can put this behind you... (read in full...)
If I get pregnant, will he get into trouble?
Q. Hi there. I am 16 years and my boyfriend is 25.We have been dating for almost 2 years. If he makes me pregnant and i then go stay with him and his family, will he get into any kind of trouble?? ...
A. 6 May 2010: why are you askig this? you nee to look after yourself and get a job before you can start a family... (read in full...)
We've been together 6 months and he refuses to tell his ex about me!
Q. I'm in a relationship with a man who has 2 children with a ex girlfriend (1 isn't his but he raised him as his own). We have been together for 6 months now and he refuses to tell his ex about me. They broke up over a year ago. He says its because ...
A. 6 May 2010: Im afaird it doesnt sound good, you ened to give him an ultimatum, either he tells her or you're over. its not fair on you and I can only see one reason for keeping this a secret, thats if somethings still going on with them... (read in full...)
Pregnant despite an IUD, he's saying don't keep the child
Q. I am currently 7wks and 2days pregnant but I also have an IUD!! I am 23 and I have two kids already. I got pregnant at 15 and 16yrs old. My sons are now 5 and 7. My boyfriend of 2yrs is 30yrs old and has four children with his previous wife. So we ...
A. 6 May 2010: does an IUD mean u can miscarry? can u not get it removed? Id advise you to keep the baby its not fair to be pressured into an abortion and chigirl has outlined good reasons for keeping it... (read in full...)
What can I do to help my sister in her unhappy marriage?
Q. Hi, i sincerely need your help. Its concerning my eldest sister, she's been married for almost 2years now, but marriage for her has been hell. On several occasions due to quarrels, he throws her belongings outside and changes the locks of the house, ...
A. 4 May 2010: you should talk to her and ask her what does she want to happen, does she want to stay with this guy or would she prefer to return to her parents house?... (read in full...)
Do you ever get over your first love?
Q. Hi, I have a question that maybe subjective but do you ever get over your first love? I am a happily married 37 yr old and have been with my husband for fourteen years now. My first real boyfriend was when I was 17 and we went out for two year...
A. 19 April 2010: its hard to stop thinking about your first love especially when they pop up out of nowhere, Id say try to forget him when you meet the second time round things are never as rosy as the first.... (read in full...)
Does my boyfriend REALLY want to marry me?
Q. My boyfriend's family don't really like me but I want to get married to him. They would be totally against it. He says if I can get a million fans on my Facebook page he'll marry me anyway. So far I've only managed to get 137. Surely if he re...
A. 19 April 2010: whatd facebook got to do with it? whats wrong with him? thats a ridiculous thing for him to say, Id be questoning his maturity or rather the lack of it... (read in full...)
He's in no hurry to divorce his wife! what should I do?
Q. I have been dating this guy for two years who is separated. he is so good to me and we have such a great relationship. I could never imagine my life without him in it but my problem is everytime I mention him getting a divorce he gets offensive and ...
A. 19 April 2010: sorry but it sounds as if hes making excuses. I went out with a guy and had a similar problem, he had no kids but was making similar (irrelevant) excuses. best thing is to give him an ultimatum. its necessary for your future happiness. I know its ... (read in full...)
Who the heck is "Sadie?"
Q. the guy I ve been seeing just text me, he said ok tks sadie, thing is my name isnt sadie....what shall i do...
A. 19 November 2009: sounds like hes got you mixed up with someone else ! how long are you seeing each other?
say it to him and get to the bottom of it... (read in full...)
Should I go back to my ex-girlfriend, or stay with my fiancee who lied to me, and has a shady past, I do love her?
Q. This is a mess of a problem... and after reading this, you won't like me. Partially because I'm discussing cheating on my fiancee, and further because I end up passing sweeping judgment on people who've slept around. Ironic, right? That said, if you ...
A. 18 July 2009: you are so up yourself, ''good-looking, self-made, Ivy educated, and well off.'' as if that is all that matters. have you looked at your own past in detail to see whether you are a perfect person or not? I bet you havent. everyone has a past and ... (read in full...)
Frightened of my boyfriend and possibly pregnant
Q. Hi I am 16years old and my boyfriend is 19. We have been going out for a little over a year a recently he has been getting angry towards me such as when i have been text ed by a friend he will ask me who it is and if i do not say then he will squ...
A. 12 May 2009: go to your doctor and discuss your options. do your parents know you are going out with him? they might be able to warn him off?? message me if you need to talk & good luck ... (read in full...)
Am I Pregnant or not?
Q. Right, so i've been having unprotected sex with my boyfriend for the past 5 weeks on and off. Stupid, i know, but we got lazy with the condoms and haven't been worrying about it. I have never skipped a period in my life and my period was due eight ...
A. 12 May 2009: did you not expect to get pregnant from unprotected sex? it only takes once & it only takes one sperm... (read in full...)
Question about race and dating.....
Q. Hello there. I am hoping my question does not come off as offensive or racist at all. It's just that I have been dating my boyfriend almost a year now; he is caucasian (blonde hair, blue eyes) while I am asian. This has always made me a bit self ...
A. 12 May 2009: it depends on the man, though you have to consider if you are living in an area or country where caucasians are in the majority then by the law of averages he might see more caucasian women than asian women in the first place! asian woomen are very ... (read in full...)
Would this be considered rape?
Q. Hi everyone, ok I feel kind of stupid asking this. Ok last week I ended things with my BF of 2 1/2 years. He had become verbally abusive, but always saying the comments were "just joking and you know I don't really mean that". It took me about 6m...
A. 12 May 2009: hi, yes it is rape! holding you down by the wrists and throwing you down on the bed bnefore pushing his hand down your pants.. if thats not rape I dont know what is! if you still dont take mine and the other readers word for it try ringing some ... (read in full...)
Chances of her being pregnant?
Q. My fiance and I had sex last night, we normally pull out but she was on top and we couldn't coordinate fast enough when I came so the first couple shots ended up getting inside her. It wasn't much and she went to the bathroom and washed out. Could ...
A. 10 April 2009: whats wrong with using a CONDOM? or some other kind of contraception... (read in full...)
Are you in a controlling relationship?
Q. i decided to write this article in view of the amount of people that I know/know of who are in unuqual relationships, that is in particular women who are in unequal relationships. Im not sating that it doesnt happen to men, of course, but often it ...
A. 10 April 2009: thank you for commenting on my article, believe me you are better off without him. people like that strip you of your confidence by manipulation you & saying things like ''you wont get another guy'' thats what makes their partners so attached to ... (read in full...)
Married man pursuing young girl...
Q. There is this married man that keeps calling me. I don't understand why he wants to talk to me (he got my phone number through a friend) since we have nothing in common and the age level is too far apart. Well yes I do because he probably just wants ...
A. 20 March 2009: call his wife & tell her about this, if youi dont have her number why not ask this great friend of yours who gave him your number? failing that call around to his house, or threaten him with telling her the next time you hear from him.... (read in full...)
I feel as if I'm in a prison hell and don't know how to get out of it.
Q. Hi, this is a bit complicated but I'll try to explain. One year and 3 months ago my ex split up from me, I'd been with him for 7 years and was obviously devastated at the time. We have 2 children together as well. Anyway 6 months after this happened ...
A. 20 March 2009: you have a duty to protect your childre. you know what to do... (read in full...)
I think he wants to trap me!
Q. Help plz!! Today was the first time I had sex with my boyfriend. He didn't use a condom. He said he wasn't going to nut inside of me. I gave him a rag to use when he pulled out. So he claims he used the rag. But when I was cleaning up the room I ...
A. 20 March 2009: why are you people not using condoms? I dont get it...... (read in full...)
DO men really love their girlfriends or wives if they are capable of treating them like that?
Q. I don't know what to do. My boyfriend has spat on me, called be a whore, thrown a candle into the bathtub, he has accused me of meeting with someone during the 15 minutes that he was gone and I was sitting in the bathtub before putting on my ...
A. 20 March 2009: no, get out of there fast. for your own sake... (read in full...)
Why does the cheating partner turn it around like its the other person's fault?
Q. I in need of advice. I spend every day from the time i wake up around 7.30am when i know my husband gone to work, just sat in a chair i go on the computer just browsing when i am not doing this i cry i am crying now as i trying to write what i a...
A. 20 March 2009: oh & the reason why the cheater makes it out to be the other persons fault is because they're trying to desperately justify their actions. dont take it.... (read in full...)
Why does the cheating partner turn it around like its the other person's fault?
Q. I in need of advice. I spend every day from the time i wake up around 7.30am when i know my husband gone to work, just sat in a chair i go on the computer just browsing when i am not doing this i cry i am crying now as i trying to write what i a...
A. 20 March 2009: you would be better to move out or better still to throw him out since you have done nothing wrong, its him who is at fault. you should sit him down & tell him how you feel & dont mince your words. then tell him you need space. your not over ... (read in full...)
How do I become a caring guy interested in girls?
Q. I had masturbatd 4 4yrs,bt had stop and i hv noticed dat i now find relationshipt boring, so i find it difficult 2 enter in2 a relatnship even though i had many girl as friend bt i cant love any of dem. So pls wat should i do 2 start lovin girls. ...
A. 9 March 2009: you need to take your time & find a girl that you really like. message me if you need any more advice... (read in full...)
Is this really a size zero diet?
Q. If I do a 2-4-6 diet, for example, one day fast, the next day eat 200 cals, the next day 400 cals, the next 600 cals, and then the next fast again, and go round in this cycle would it be possible to get to size zero? With only doing small exersise, ...
A. 28 February 2009: it is a starvation diet and unless you want to lose upto 10 inches of your former height as you get older on top of getting osteoporosis by the age of 30 go ahead by all means. these arent ''risks'' as you say, there are FACTS.
a size 12 is a nor... (read in full...)
I'm 18 and wanting a 2nd child... I'm having trouble conceiving, help!
Q. i am 18.as of sept.08 i got preg. with my first child when i was 16 with my ex of 3 years.my son just turned 1 feb 10. i have been datin my new man for almost 2 years now and i am wanting another child but i am having problums conciving. my boyfr...
A. 25 February 2009: whats your hurry? your only 18 & what makes you think you'll be together for ever? this has irresponsible written all over it. ... (read in full...)
How should I tell my partner that I want to have kids?
Q. ive been with my partner now for over a year and im 21 and hes 22 i wanna have a child but i dont know how to tell him; he has already got a 3 year old from a previous relationship and hes a good dad but he could also have another one which is a few ...
A. 25 February 2009: seriously? your thinking of having a child with him now in case your not together in 2 years time? do I even need to explain to you whats wrong here?... (read in full...)
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