| Latest articles: Are you in a controlling relationship?
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
3 April 2009: i decided to write this article in view of the amount of people that I know/know of who are in unuqual relationships, that is in particular women who are in unequal relationships. Im not sating that it doesnt happen to men, of course, but often it ...
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How do I tell my boyfriend I MIGHT be pregnant?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 months now. We get along very well and things are great up until now. The problem is that my period is late and I think I might be pregnant. I know I shouldnt freak out until I know for sure but Im worried. ...
A. 14 June 2012: Im after reading your update and glad to hear you are A ok ('',) good luck for the future x... (read in full...)
How to deal with boyfriend getting another woman pregnant
Q. I have a boyfriend, we have been dating off an on about 5 years.Serious about an year and a half. I just found out a few months ago the he got some other woman pregnant.He didnt know she was prgnant till after the baby was 9 months old.So now she is ...
A. 14 June 2012: you asked for advice, just because it is not the answers you wanted its not fair to write it off as not helping, people here have taken the time to read your problem and answer, be grateful for that. I would simply dump him, there is no hope for ... (read in full...)
I finally managed to get out of an unhappy relationship, so why am I missing him so much? Should I call him?
Q. Yesterday, I broke up with my boyfriend. After 2.5 years I just had enough. He never kissed, hugged me, asked about my day. He never made an effort to talk to me. I had fallen out of love. I admit for the first 2 years I did everything he asked ...
A. 8 June 2012: you are better off without this loser, you will see in time... (read in full...)
Disgusted by my fiancee's past relationship
Q. Hello, I'm due to marry my fiancee in December, I love her so much and she's perfect for me. I'm 36 so am no spring chicken, and have had past relationships that never worked out so I know what an awful lot I have to lose if I blow this one. ...
A. 8 June 2012: shes not with him anymore and choices she made then are not the same ones she would make now. we all make mistakes, it doesnt mean you are not her ''type'' now, just because she dated this loser when she was 18. I went out with a total loser at that ... (read in full...)
I want to stop taking my birth control pill and not tell my b/f
Q. I'm 20. I started dating a great guy a few months ago, and for the past month, all I've been thinking about is getting pregnant. He's 27, has a wonderful job, and would not walk out on me if I got pregnant. His father left when he was young and he ...
A. 7 June 2012: its a highly selfish and immature thing to do, that should be reality check enough for you... (read in full...)
My baby's daddy is giving me the cold shoulder
Q. Ill try to keep this short and sweet, my bf and i were together over 3 years we have a 2 year old together. he has a lot of stress and demons, drug addict, anxiety, can't hold a job, his dad just passed away, we never broke up but he seems to say we ...
A. 3 June 2012: you can do better, I know his father died but thats no excuse to be addicted to drugs when he has a child to think about. also he cant expect you to just stick around when hes messing you about. you both deserve better from him.... (read in full...)
Is there any woman who would even consider dating a guy with his life in as big a mess as mine?
Q. So, this is my first time posting here, but I could really use some advice. I'm 24 years old, and still living with my father and sister. I've been looking for work for well over a year now, and recently got laid-off from the job I had. Making th...
A. 3 June 2012: things are not as bad as they seem.I understand your concerns over your weight, Im 210 lbs and Im a female (bad I know) and if you struggle with your weight it can take over your life. on the virgin front, I would rather date a virgin than a man ... (read in full...)
Why would my b/f be happy if his ex had been pregnant but not me?
Q. My fiance and I were talking and the topic about babies came up. I would like to have a child soon, but he wants to wait. However, few months back when we were just dating and not engaged, his ex-gf had a prgnancy scare and it would have been his ...
A. 3 June 2012: ''I asked how would he feel if she was pregnant with his kid. He said he would be happy and that he hopes that she is pregnant.''
-what?! if my boyfriend/fiance/even someone who claimed to be interested in me said that I would freak. what kind of ... (read in full...)
B/f had 3 year relationship with me a baby, then I find out he was seeing another woman for 6 years!
Q. I was with my boyfriend for 3 and a half years and 3 days before i gave birth to our now 2 month old son the 'other woman' knocked my door and i found out he was having a on and off again relationship with her for 6 years! Even though she found out ...
A. 2 June 2012: kick him out, he only confessed after she already told you which means if she did not show up on your door you would still be in the dark. what kind of basis for a relationship is that? Im really sorry about what as happened to you, it must be any ... (read in full...)
Got pregnant without intercourse -- can I still call myself a virgin?
Q. Hello,am 22yrs old,a female and av always wanted to keep my virginity for the right guy.wen I was 18,I was in a relationship and wen we are making out,he normally uses his penis to rub my vagina,in one of dose occassions!he ejaculated on my vagina ...
A. 2 June 2012: yes you are still a virgin, I have heard of this happening other people... (read in full...)
My boyfriend got another woman pregnant
Q. My boyfriend and I have known eachother for years. We finally started a relationship that was almost 2 years now. I took a break I wanted it. It didn't feel like a break at all. We were still sleeping together. He wasn't giving me space. So I ...
A. 2 June 2012: ''he doesn't do drugs when he is with me'' so you mean he does drugs? you can do far better, a guy on drugs who doesnt use condoms and puts your health at risk is not good news. try to find it in yourself to move on -alone x... (read in full...)
How to deal with boyfriend getting another woman pregnant
Q. I have a boyfriend, we have been dating off an on about 5 years.Serious about an year and a half. I just found out a few months ago the he got some other woman pregnant.He didnt know she was prgnant till after the baby was 9 months old.So now she is ...
A. 2 June 2012: anyone who you are on off with for more than a few months is a waste of your time, believe me. you deserve far better. he has 2 kids, one while he was with you and the other one before that which he didnt tell you about. seriously he sounds like a ... (read in full...)
I'm 15 and want to have a baby even though I'm not ready
Q. I'm 15 and I feel like I want to have a baby even though I know I'm not ready financially. Why do I feel like this? How can I push the thought away? I have been in a relationship for almost 3 years now and we have talked about having kids but not ...
A. 31 May 2012: more than answer your question about why you feel this way, I think it would be helpful to suggest a way of stopping the feeling. you could find people who need a babysitter, that way you get experience with kids, earn money & also see every aspect ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my boyfriend I MIGHT be pregnant?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 months now. We get along very well and things are great up until now. The problem is that my period is late and I think I might be pregnant. I know I shouldnt freak out until I know for sure but Im worried. ...
A. 25 May 2012: the last 2 answers are very good. you know what you want to do with this so dont let people blackmail and guilt trip you into making ''THEIR'' decision, it is your decision to make and you are doing it for the right reasons.definitely do a test ... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant and don't feel excited about that or my boyfriend. Will these feelings pass?
Q. Hey, I need some help to understand why I don't feel emotionally connected to my bf anymore, and if this means I no longer love him, and what I should do, please. We've been together 2 years, and at first, I was wary of opening up to him too much ...
A. 23 May 2012: I think you are feeling this way because you were not over him being dishonest when you found out you were pregnant. now I dont mean that in a bad way, I would be really pissed if I had been in your situation. you dont say how long you people are ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is a gangster! Should I marry him?
Q. Hiya, I'm 27 years old woman and I dated a 19 year old boy for 5 months last year. The very first time that we met, I doubted that we would ever got along as he's 8years younger than me, turned out, it was like love at the first sight for us both ...
A. 9 May 2012: no offence but you deserve better. please try to move on... (read in full...)
How can people not think of pornography as cheating?
Q. I have something bothering me i've read and discussed this and people say that a boyfriend using porn is no different than him imagining someone in his head but I strongly disagree. Masturbating to porn is alot worse it is an actual picture but ...
A. 9 May 2012: people can say I am a prude or whatever but to me porn is cheating. the one watching is imagining having sex with these people and is longing for them, therefore in my mind it is cheating and I would be/have been deeply hurt to discover a boyfriend ... (read in full...)
I want my dad to come to my graduation but not his wife and kids
Q. So first thing, I haven't spoken to my father or that side of my family for almost 8 years now, after my dad kicked me out of his house when I was 14 (I lived with my mother after that - they were divorced). I'm graduating this Saturday from co...
A. 9 May 2012: you could tell him that you were only allocated 2 tickets for the ceremony and your mom or someone else is taking the other ticket.... or if that wont wash say something like you are only allowed to have 2 guests at the actual ceremony, or a limited ... (read in full...)
My Muslin parents are extremist and I'm not allowed to do anything!
Q. I need help. I have such extremist parents. I am a Muslim and I'm not allowed to do anything. I'm not allowed to go to my friend's houses. I'm not allowed to go to the park. I'm not allowed to go to town. I'm not allowed to go out. I'm not...
A. 9 May 2012: would you be ablt to ask your parents to meet your friends? so that they are not threatened or intimidated by them? perhaps once they meet your friends and see that they are nice people, they might relax a bit. make sure it is only female friends ... (read in full...)
My parents want me to be married at age 18. How can I if I'm a lesbian?
Q. i live with my family and i m only 16,my parents want me to get married wen i will be 18 but i do not want to get married! i have no choice,no where to go! if i leave the house i will have no hope to lead my life but if i get married to a boy i ca...
A. 9 May 2012: you could ask your parents to allow you to continue your education a bit longer. if they cannot afford this, then ask them if there is a way you can work before you marry, you can say it will help you to be a better wife, as an excuse. I know the ... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant with triplets and found out through text messages that my fiance is planning on leaving me to be with my cousin. Do I confront him?
Q. well where do I start... Hmmm I know well let's start off by saying Im 20 years old and 5 months pregnant with triplets. Thats right 3 kids all at once. Don't get me wrong I am excited for my little ones to get here but.... I'm going through ...
A. 9 May 2012: dump him immediately. what a scumbag! and dont ever forgive him or your cousin, its his loss on a massive scale not yours. take him for all you can get off him, your cousin should have known better too. I can only imagine you are feeling even worse ... (read in full...)
Paranoid about loose skin and having a sagging tummy after birth....
Q. I'm about to give birth in a couple months and I am paranoid about loose skin and having a saggy tummy for the rest of my life. Most girls I know get permanent saggy bellies after giving birth yet there was one who has had three babies and yet looks ...
A. 9 May 2012: look up binders to wear after the birth... (read in full...)
Pregnant and feeling very alone, to make things worse after I went to my first check-up alone I found flirty texts to another woman! Am I being extra clingy because I'm pregnant?
Q. My boyfriend has a lot of responsibilities. Parents etc. He works hard too. We found out I am pregnant but he doesn't seem to pay any attention to me anyway. When I asked him to spend more time with me after work, he recently questioned me if I ...
A. 9 May 2012: you are not overreacting, I personally would be freaking out in the same situation! putting the gym before your pregnant girlfriend?! please consider the other answers that have been posted on this page, I wish you the best... (read in full...)
I'm 23 weeks pregnant and he keeps leaving and coming back. why?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together 2 1/2 years we have a son and a daughter on the way. Everything started out good we never fought. Things were said later on and I found things and started getting to where I was afraid to trust him I know that's ...
A. 9 May 2012: honeypie and cerberus have said it all. you are allowing him to use you, what kind of man only goes back to his pregnant ex for sex, not to see how she is doing with carrying HIS baby? sorry to say, but you cant rely on or trust this man. and I ... (read in full...)
I want a baby even though I'm in no position to have one!
Q. Hiya! I am mum to a gorgeous little girl, who is due to turn 5 on Tuesday. The problem is, ever since she was two, I have been broody. And it has been getting worse and worse, to the point where it actually hurts sometimes. I am not in the righ...
A. 8 May 2012: you could offer to babysit peoples kids and make some money doing that, while also making your body realise you have enough kids (one) for now? and it might ease the overwhelming desire to have a child, its the best suggestion I can think of.... ... (read in full...)
Is it natural for a 17 yr old boy to find a girl's nurturing and mothering side attractive even if it's just the way she soothed her pet when it was scared?
Q. Is it natural for a 17 yr old boy to find a girl's nurturing and mothering side attractive even if it's just the way she soothed her pet when it was scared? I don't think I was thinking of her sexually in any way and I wasn't thinking about having ...
A. 13 April 2012: yes it is natural, and it shows a caring and sensitive side to your nature. it is a good thing, if you didnt find it attractive you wouldnt be a very nice person. so yes, and be pleased that you are aware of these things! good luck x... (read in full...)
He is flirting on Facebook, with 3 girls, should I end the relationship?
Q. I know I shouldn't have done this but i went on my boyfriends facebook because I had a gut feeling he was taking to someone. He's never had a steady girlfriend and once he met me he stopped going out partying like he used to and actually fell in ...
A. 13 April 2012: in a word -yes.... (read in full...)
He doesn't want me for anything other than sex. How do I end things gently?
Q. Hi everyone I really need help with this situation I have been sleeping with a man for over a year now I really like him he told me we were just taking things slowly but now I finally aksed him what was going on with us he said it is just sex so I ...
A. 13 April 2012: ''Im not interested in this arrangement anymore, dont contact me again'' will suffice.... (read in full...)
How do you end things when the other person is ignoring you?
Q. Last August my boyfriend of 5 years just uppin left me .. 3 days later I got a text message saying he was moving out and we were done. Then 3 days after that he was seen with a new girl at work. That ended about a month later. And we started talking ...
A. 13 April 2012: you did the right thing, if he bothers you again try your best to ignore him.... its how I got rid of one very bothersome ex... (read in full...)
I'm 21 and I think sex is boring. I astound the guys I date! Is there a problem?
Q. I'm 21 and I have very little sexual experience. I've been to third base a couple of times, but I usually end it quickly because I'm not comfortable or I think it's boring. I do fantasize and play with myself occasionally, but almost never with ...
A. 8 April 2012: I think that everyone is different and it is normal to be less interested in sex the same way peoples affections (non sexual affection) are different. you are not ''too old'' to not be interested in sex, when you meet someone who you are more ... (read in full...)
I'm 13 and I fancy my woodshop teacher!
Q. I'm 13 and I do woodwork in school. It's very hard,and the teacher lets me away with EVERYTHING!I take out my phone in class,and he doesn't mind. I walk around the classroom all the time and I never do my work! And I didn't do my homework,and ...
A. 8 April 2012: you are too young to be romantically involved with your teacher, sorry but it is true. it is normal to fancy someone older and often we do find ourselves attracted to a teacher especially if the teacher is reasonably young. your friend might be ... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant and he cheated on me. Should I give him another chance?
Q. im 19 years old and my boyfriend is 21 years old. Last week my boyfriend went clubbing with his friends and brother while i stayed home alone. I am 6 months pregnant with our first---twins. While he went clubbing he started dancing with this girl ...
A. 8 April 2012: what happened that you ended up in hospital?I just read the updates....?... (read in full...)
Is this girl pregnant with my boyfriend's baby? I cant even ask him because he's locked up!
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together for a long time he's bad but I really love him and he loves me very much,I'm only16 and I need help?...I found out that he was texting other girls...one of their names was Gina,now this was about five months ...
A. 8 April 2012: you must be really upset but to be honest with you, you deserve better. the guy is locked up and he is not trustworthy. these kind of problems are not something you should be dealing with at your age. please for your own sake concentrate on your ... (read in full...)
My ex is pregnant. How do I find out if its mine?
Q. What should I do? Went out with girl 4.5 years, she cheated, we got back together, she dumped me we got back together. End of last year was dumped again, I'm thinking cheating again .. Swears not no one else.. She wants no contact, I'm still being ...
A. 8 April 2012: I agree with the answer directly below mine, the one at the bottom isnt very considerate of your feelings sorry. I would get in contact with her even if she doesnt want to hear from you, you have a right to ask and you definitely have a right to ... (read in full...)
Could my baby look like my lover?
Q. If a woman is pregnant and sleeps with another man can the baby have features of the man who is not the father?...
A. 20 March 2012: haha ! some of these answers really made me laugh! I honestly thought this was a joke question. ok. lets keep this as simple as possible. the stork does not change its route, or switch around babies. once the stork is on its way, with your baby, it ... (read in full...)
I'm jealous of his very attractive best friend! What can I do?
Q. I am in a very sticky situation. My bf and I have been happily together for 10 months and were friends for about 5 years prior. Things have pretty much gone off without a hitch, except for his very attractive, charismatic best friend. She is beaut...
A. 14 October 2011: ok that would piss me off, particularly the bit about if you want her to look less attractive. if hes with you then its you he should be attracted to, as your his girlfriend. its as simple as that. when we fall in love with someone we do find them ... (read in full...)
Baby dreams at the age of 16?
Q. Hey I'm 15 and i really want a baby I'm an honour student and I'm responsible.I have thought about this so many times before, about how am i going to work with school. My friends say that I would make a great mother because I'm caring and sweet ...
A. 13 August 2011: are you kidding me? your 15, & you probably only did your junior cert this year, and you think you can look after a baby aswell as school and work?? you do realise there is no work in Ireland? so presumably you expect to get social welfare for your ... (read in full...)
Psycho boyfriend broke up with me, stiffed me for money, now sends email to brother worried about my mental health? huh?
Q. Why is my ex-boyfriend of three years contacting my brother asking about me? He dumped me nine months ago. To say it was an ugly break-up is an understatement. He left me in a callous manner(at a destination wedding for my best friend). I was so ...
A. 15 July 2011: hes just being an a**hole, dont think about maintaining any form of contact with him. he sounds like a total loser and your well rid.... (read in full...)
What should I do? I'm doing things I normally wouldn't do and wouldn't agree with
Q. I'm involved with a married man who's still with his wife. we have a 1 years old baby we've been apart for 10 months because he lied about being married and I couldn't take him getting his cake and eating it too. But now we've been back together on ...
A. 7 July 2011: ''i feel bad for the other woman'' she is not the other woman, she is his WIFE! you know this was a great mistake to make before you had his kid, it is a messy situation but you know the best thing to do yourself.... (read in full...)
I'm in love with my stepbrother! What should I do?
Q. My dad is marrying a gal with 2 boys and 1 girl, she is pregnant with my half brother.I am in love with my stepbrother but my other little stepbrother and stepsister have caught us together and now they threaten to tell my dad. It would destroy my ...
A. 24 June 2011: I agree with the readers who said your not related so go for it, there cant be anything illegal about it and as the reader said americans are very puritanical. its not like you both grew up together, then it would be more complicated, you only knew ... (read in full...)
Why do my co workers want to pry into when I will have children? To me it's rude, and I'm single.
Q. My co workers always ask me when am I going to have children, even though they know that I'm single. I find this extremely rude. My co workers are all older and most married with children. Married people really annoy me as they don't remember what ...
A. 24 June 2011: when they next start asking you these cheeky questions, ask them when are they planning to have their next baby or when are they due. they will soon get the message loud and clear. I totally understand where your coming from, I have had a couple of ... (read in full...)
What is it like having an abortion?
Q. I am about 5 weeks pregnant and i am going to have an abortion I dont know anyone who has ever had an abortion before Does anyone know what happens? Do they have to do a scan before hand? I just think if they do a scan i will want to see it and e...
A. 24 June 2011: hope your ok, just read your question now ! x... (read in full...)
Why have I never had a boyfriend?
Q. I have never had a boyfriend. I'm not really the type of person to give a shit ordinarily, but in the last few months it has really been bothering me. I'm a bit chubby (size 16) but other than that I don't think I'm overly hideous. I'm a little bit ...
A. 7 June 2011: if its any consolation I have never had a great relationship in my life, and only 1 proper boyfriend who lied constantly to me. I often have the same thoughts and questions as you have written in your letter, and like you I am a size 16. (5 ft 7). I ... (read in full...)
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