I worry so much about my baby, I just need a balanced view.
Q. Hi All, I've posted a number of times before and you've always provided me with great advice. My child's dad and I split before he was born ( 16weeks pregnant). Our son was planned - tried for a year to conceive him..split after ten yea...
A. 18 June 2018: I wouldn't try and force your ex to spend more time.
I don't think THAT would be beneficial to your son at all.
What your son NEEDS as he grows up are POSITIVE role-models and people who WANT to be around him.
I don't think your ex real... (read in full...)
Who is the weird one, me or him?
Q. I have this guy friend that I’ve been knowing for almost a year now, we’ve been involved intimately at one point, pretty much on and off. We both have feelings for each other. We recently started conversing again and hung out. We’re both still ...
A. 17 June 2018: I think it comes down to two things.
1. what do YOU want (from him)
2. what is realistic.
I think if this guy wants MORE than you do, you need to let him go so he can find someone who WANTS him back.
I think his approach is that of a ... (read in full...)
I'm talking all the time to my ex girlfriend who is crying about her life. What can I do?
Q. Well guys m confused how to think about something , i had a relationship with a girl for almost 5 years everything was great but we had to break up because she left the countery to study far away but we keept contact as good freind few months later ...
A. 17 June 2018: I agree, with Ciar and Code Warrior,
I would just wish her well and cut all contact. You were with her at a very young age and for a GOOD number of years, so it's not strange that you still hold some feelings for her. The things is, OP SHE move... (read in full...)
Should I reach out to him again after a long time away?
Q. Hi everyone! While working a contract gig, I developed a huge crush on someone in our building. We chatted a little bit, kind of had lunch once, but our schedules were never consistent. On my last day, he left early. I planned to ask him out for ...
A. 17 June 2018: Well, then you just check him of your "to do list or the I wish I had reached out list".
It's OK. Not all guy you meet will be interested to the same level as you. It happens, the things is to NOT waste time on the ones YOU have no interest... (read in full...)
He is blowing hot and cold, I don't know what to think.
Q. So a guy I work with initially showed some interest in me, which if you know me is quite rare. At first I was a little uncertain, he wasn't my usual type but we did make eachother laugh and it's been a while so I thought why not. We gradually g...
A. 17 June 2018: He isn't looking for anything but for you to give him ego-rubs.
He likes the idea of you "lusting" after him or wanting to get to know him.
I think he might not be either comfortable with ACTUALLY dating a man or just not really into you.... (read in full...)
I want a baby but time is running out fast!
Q. IM not sure what to do , Im a single woman and dont have time on my side children wise. I want to have a child before its too late. I have never met 'the one'and im starting to feel down because time is running out. With adoption it can take a long ...
A. 17 June 2018: There is definitely the possibility of "your child" with a donor having half-siblings. But that could happen with a family friend or a one-night stand.
My husband had a guy in his unit who had fathered 14 kids! lol
So yes, it is possible one ... (read in full...)
I want a baby but time is running out fast!
Q. IM not sure what to do , Im a single woman and dont have time on my side children wise. I want to have a child before its too late. I have never met 'the one'and im starting to feel down because time is running out. With adoption it can take a long ...
A. 16 June 2018: I have a friend who went the sperm donor route 10 years ago and she had her daughter. 2 years later she met an awesome man who she have since married. He adopted her daughter.
They did try for another child but haven't been successful.
I don't... (read in full...)
Should I give both of us another chance? Or not bother?
Q. Hi everyone. I have this ex who i was with 2 years ago. We met and everything was great so much that we moved together in 3 months so we could be closer, he lived in another city. From that moment on he gradually changed and was becoming cold, ...
A. 15 June 2018: I think it would be a bad idea for you to go back ot this guy.
You two moved in with each other after ONLY 3 months, so you BARELY knew each other. You knew what he had shown you but when you live with someone you SEE more of them. As in, you only... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is on his phone but does not reply to my texts!
Q. My boyfriend used to take the initiative to text me in the beginning of the relationship, but lately it has become such that he takes hours to reply to a simple text. I'm not a heavy texter myself. But I noticed that he checks Instagram freque...
A. 15 June 2018: Try for a period of time to put in as much effort (or rather as little) as he is. If he notices and either bring it up or he starts to participate more, good. If he doesn't notice then WHAT are you doing being in a LDR with a guy who doesn't give a ... (read in full...)
How do I show him I’m interested in him?
Q. I really like my tattooist and I think he likes me too but I'm so crap at judging these things. He told me he broke up with his gf pretty much as soon as I saw him the other day. He asked what star sign I am how old I was. I think he's really cute ...
A. 15 June 2018: Why not just have conversations with him?
We usually talk to people we WANT to get to know better, but not always. Sometimes small talk is just to be polite.
So engage in conversations. Get to know him. You think he is cute and you think y... (read in full...)
The death of my pet caused me to perform terribly at work!
Q. Hi everyone. This is a coworker relationship question. Nothing romantic. Just wasn't sure where to go to ask this as I like going here. I started this job about two months ago. It is a unique job. Without getting into too many details, I...
A. 15 June 2018: Just apologize to the lady who had to do all the extra work.
Tell, her : "I'm sorry I didn't perform and you had to work extra hard, WHAT can I do to fix this?"
I wouldn't go into a deep explanation. It is what it is. Some people can hide ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to miss a toxic relationship?
Q. We are both 30, in the good days, we had an amazing relationship, we had a TONNNNN of things in common, we agreed on a lot of things, we traveled many times and we were a team, when things were good, they were amazing... rarely things that we ...
A. 15 June 2018: It's easy to look back and only see the good in this guy (or any person) but it won't help you heal.
HE is 100% responsible for how he acted, how he treated you and what he DID. But you are responsible for setting boundaries and having a standard... (read in full...)
Me and my dad's friend want to take it to the next level
Q. Me and my dad's friend have been texting for a while and we've talked about taking things to another level... Im not sure what to do about it, i mean i'm 21 an he's about 30, I have always like older guys and we are into each other but you know he's ...
A. 15 June 2018: You know what this is?
It's called GROOMING. The fact that it's done behind your dad's back pretty much shows that his "friend" knows this isn't OK.
If this was about LOVE, he wouldn't disrespect you AND your father this way.
And the fact th... (read in full...)
Should I bother with this communal garden? I think I’ve attracted a bully!
Q. I live in a block of eight flats. It's a period (Victorian) building, converted into separate dwellings. Surrounding this (kind of in a circle) are five houses. In the middle, is a communal garden. The two flats on the ground floor all have th...
A. 15 June 2018: Good for you OP!
I'm glad you didn't back away or run and go hide.
LIVE your life! Enjoy life. Enjoy gardening!
And sometimes calling a person out in a "fairly" polite way - like I suggested - it can actually help. Sure, she might not like... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's drunken behaviour was nasty. Should I just let it pass?
Q. My bf, myself and our close friends were at a house party. I spent most of my time helping the hosts so I was pretty much sober while my bf decided to get sloshed after many years. By the end of the night, he had way too many and was totally out ...
A. 14 June 2018: My grandfather was a "seasonal drinker" I think is what they called it back in the day. Today I think it would be closer to a "functional binge drinker". He was able to have a job, take care of house and garden, travel, socialize etc. etc. BUT once ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to miss a toxic relationship?
Q. We are both 30, in the good days, we had an amazing relationship, we had a TONNNNN of things in common, we agreed on a lot of things, we traveled many times and we were a team, when things were good, they were amazing... rarely things that we ...
A. 14 June 2018: Of course you miss him. Even if the relationship was toxic and dysfunctional you GOT something out of it.
The things is, when someone keep disregarding his/her own standards in order to STAY in a relationship with someone at some point they DO ... (read in full...)
How do I learn to stop caring so much about other people's opinions?
Q. Hello aunts, I wanted to seek advice on how to stop caring about how other people perceive me and how to gather strength on the inside. I am a woman in my thirties that (not trying to sound vain) has been told I am very pretty - skinny and beaut...
A. 14 June 2018: Improve your mind, OP
Now this might sound like "simple" advice" but it's not. It's good that you are attractive and FEEL attractive but look don't help much in meeting. KNOWLEDGE does.
Which means you can IMPROVE on your level of knowledge. Ma... (read in full...)
I asked for help and he lied about why he couldn't.
Q. I am not sure if what I am feeling right now is normal or I am being unjust? I asked for help from my boyfriend of 4 years. what I need is a room/place to stay for 1 year while I am doing the last part of my studies. We do not live together...
A. 14 June 2018: It honestly sounds like he doesn't want to cohabit with you.
Either her isn't ready (which to me sounds weird after all you two have been together and 4 years of dating), nevertheless he might NOT be ready. OR he prefer to have his place you have... (read in full...)
The guy I'm seeing used to have a huge crush on one of my friends
Q. Hello. I would like some advice. I have been dating this guy for about three months now. So far he's one of the nicest people I've dated. When we were first getting to know each other he mentioned he knew a group of my friends and that he briefly ...
A. 14 June 2018: I don't really think this is about HIS crush but YOUR insecurities and YOU comparing yourself to "Bree".
You describe her as outgoing, fun, pretty but you also had to take some STABS at her for being "promiscuous and hasn't put much work into her... (read in full...)
My ex-girlfriend has a way of messing with my head
Q. Hi all, Long story cut short. I was in a lesbian relationship with my gf for two years. She kissed a guy during our relationship (even lied to my face and was secretly sending messages to him). This pushed me to pursue my dreams in working a...
A. 14 June 2018: No, OP this shouldn't be about HER and WHY she is doing - but WHY you are allowing it.
YOU know you are miserable.
You know she is stringing you along.
YOU know she sees no future with you.
YOU know she is using you.
YET you keep her in... (read in full...)
All couples argue..But where do we draw a line?
Q. My dear other half thinks his verbal abuse is just an arguement and it would be if I would agree to that. But I know there is more to it than that and it destroys me as the pattern repeats with increasing frequency. He cant see that its not a c...
A. 13 June 2018: Learn how to fight fair?
Disagreements happens, but HOW you deal with it is what makes a difference.
Verbal abuse isn't an argument. Even if you BOTH hurl insults at each other.
There are so many ways to handle disagreements without hu... (read in full...)
Is my long-distance husband using me?
Q. Hi and thanks I have wrote on here before but I wasnt able to find my question. I have married a man from Africa, I'm Canadian. We met on Facebook and we have been married for 16 months. Doing a long distance relationship isnt easy ...
A. 13 June 2018: Well, OP IF you really thinks he loves you why not see what would happen if you cut him off from your money? For 2-3 months? Just say you can't afford sending any. And then STICK to it. NOT a single penny. HE is a GROWN ASS man and should be able to ... (read in full...)
The relationship started off terribly and it’s still rocky, but we really love each other! Do I leave or stay?
Q. I’m in this relationship with a guy for a year and a half now. The relationship started off terribly because he started ghosting me after a month. We hardly met and he never replied to me. He used to ignore me for most of the time. I made a fake ...
A. 13 June 2018: OP, you are NOT in charge of how he CHOOSES to talk to you.
Sure, out in public he behaves - which means he KNOWS calling you a C*** or Who** is NOT OK, yet he still does it over the phone. Why? Because he simply don't CARE. If he in public c... (read in full...)
The relationship started off terribly and it’s still rocky, but we really love each other! Do I leave or stay?
Q. I’m in this relationship with a guy for a year and a half now. The relationship started off terribly because he started ghosting me after a month. We hardly met and he never replied to me. He used to ignore me for most of the time. I made a fake ...
A. 12 June 2018: It sounds so crappy and toxic, I don't understand why you would WANT this for yourself.
One thing is your little "sting operation Fake Girl" to see if he would talk to another girl, but the MOMENT he talked SMACK about you, WHY didn't you end it a... (read in full...)
How do you know if you're meant to be together forever?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3.5 years, lived together for almost 3 years of that. He's my best friend and we've spoken openly about marriage and kids. Anyway, my question is, how do you know if you're really meant to be together fore...
A. 12 June 2018: You won't know if you are "meant" to be together forever. I don't believe in "happily ever after". That is for fairy tales not reality. there are no guarantees.
You take life one day at a time. You WORK on your relationship, you invest in it, emot... (read in full...)
Should our relationship be more connected than this?
Q. My partner and I have been together for three years and I feel like our lives aren't as "connected" as they should be. We lived together and spend a lot of time together in the flat, but outside we don't do anything. I have a few close friends, b...
A. 12 June 2018: I agree with you that after 3 years you should BOTH be a bigger apart of each other's lives.
I think he likes HIS life to be - partly with you but also partly with his family and friends where you JUST aren't a part of it because of cultural... (read in full...)
Am I too shallow? Should I give him a chance?
Q. I got out of a 1 year relationship recently where the guy didn't treat me right towards the end. Now i met this wonderful man who is the complete opposite of my ex, very affectionate, sweet, caring, he is mature and really really likes me. He even ...
A. 11 June 2018: I agree with Code Warrior,
You ARE being shallow and well, THAT is OK. You like what you like. Your fashion sense is YOURS.
Is he a bit of a rebound and thus you don't quite feel like you want to "invest" too much in him (subconsciously)... (read in full...)
She has a guy friend stay over!
Q. I am dating someone and have been for 4 or 5 months now. She is having a guy friend stay over, which makes me uncomfortable on a level of respect. I have stayed at another girls place with a previous gf and was told by family that this shouldn't of ...
A. 11 June 2018: Honestly?
I agree with you, this isn't appropriate no matter how "platonic" friends they are.
As for trust... Trust is EARNED - and should be FREELY given, it's not an automatic when dating someone new.
You two have different view on this, ... (read in full...)
Should I bother with this communal garden? I think I’ve attracted a bully!
Q. I live in a block of eight flats. It's a period (Victorian) building, converted into separate dwellings. Surrounding this (kind of in a circle) are five houses. In the middle, is a communal garden. The two flats on the ground floor all have th...
A. 11 June 2018: You attract bullies because you CARE what other people think. OP, you are grown woman with LEGAL access to this communal garden and this ONE "territorial lady" has NO more right to the communal garden no matter HOW she acts.
You DO need to grow ... (read in full...)
I feel I’m being played with! Do I cut off all contact?
Q. My ex and I saw eachother for the first time after 6 months of not speaking at a house party around 2 weeks ago. I was extremely drunk He was telling me how much he missed me and didn’t leave my side the whole night. We even went home together...
A. 11 June 2018: If you put your hand on the stove and get burned, you wouldn't do that again, right?
If you hit your head when entering a low door, you would learn to duck on entering, right?
So IF you date someone and it JUST doesn't work out, then there ... (read in full...)
Is my long-distance husband using me?
Q. Hi and thanks I have wrote on here before but I wasnt able to find my question. I have married a man from Africa, I'm Canadian. We met on Facebook and we have been married for 16 months. Doing a long distance relationship isnt easy ...
A. 10 June 2018: Honestly?
Yes, I think he is using you. You pay for him and 3 of his friend. his mom's food AND his siblings education.
Just saying... I would "love" you long time if you did that for me! I would certainly cry when you go home... Because ... (read in full...)
Why did he throw the gifts in the trash?
Q. ok my ex boyfriend of 6 years when we met we were both 45 it’s weird cause I just had a broke up wasn’t looking and he was on Facebook I didn’t wanta like him I had just lost a lot of weight cause I had my first child only child so I was very ...
A. 10 June 2018: He honestly didn't sound like a good partner. After all he saw the relationship with you as some kind of revolving door where he could come and go as he pleased - 8 times~
You may have (still are) a sweet and attractive lady but when you let a ma... (read in full...)
Is he fighting with himself about his feelings for me?
Q. I started college and started dealing with this guy on and off for like 8 months we were never in a relationship because we both decided that the timing was off since he would be leaving to go out of state for grad school. We decided on being ...
A. 9 June 2018: Why doesn't he just leave you alone?
Good question.
But an even BETTER question would be, IF you know he has a GF and SHE is the one he wants to be with WHY don't you cut contact, block him from reaching out to you and work on moving on yourse... (read in full...)
How should I handle finding these texts?
Q. Some back story: My boyfriend and I have been together a little over a year. Aside from a few normal bumps and turns in the road, our relationship has been quite a breeze. We started off in a very unconventional way, though. I actually had a fling ...
A. 8 June 2018: Nothing GOOD comes of listening at keyholes....
I think guys will talk about thing and fantasies that they don't share with their partner (and for good reason) but this is ridiculous.
I would honestly just end it. IF he is talking SHIT abo... (read in full...)
How can I deal with this colleague
Q. How can I deal with this coworker Whatever opinion I have I have seen this coworker disagree and have opinions on. We were at at work outing and I was talking about a guy being arrested in a local pharmacy - he then asked me where I grew up ...
A. 8 June 2018: Keep all PRIVATE chatter to a minimum. Don't divulge any personal information he doesn't NEED for work.
You can't prevent another person for having a different opinion from you. And you can't prevent someone from being a dick. Because you simply c... (read in full...)
I caught feelings for a friend and I'm not sure if I should tell them
Q. We've worked together for about a year now. We became friends a couple months ago after he broke up with his girlfriend, and we started hanging out outside of work (his initiation). We've hung out every week with his group of friends, and aside from ...
A. 7 June 2018: I'm sorry to say this but I don't think he sees you as more than a friend and good support system.
Why do I say that?
Well, for one he is talking about another woman and secondly he has made NO move on you in all the time you two have become ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend often tells me small lies, how do I get him to stop?
Q. Been tigether 2 years and the past 6 months my boyfriend has the tendancy to change his stories often and its getting to a point where Im always get upset and angry and then we end up in a big argument. Theyre usually small pointless ones, but if he ...
A. 7 June 2018: I fully agree with Code Warrior.
It doesn't MATTER if he was drunk or not when he streaked.. He doesn't remember but DOES pick up on the fact that YOU thought it would be "better" if he had been drunk. So he was actually CATERING to you.
... (read in full...)
Have you ever felt perplexed by a person's disinterest towards you?
Q. To keep it short, I've been having sex with this guy for almost 2 years. I'm fine that it's not a relationship. Things have been good, but there is one thing that's been on my mind. Firstly, yes, we always talk before sex, he'll sometimes tak...
A. 7 June 2018: Stop having a casual "thing" with a guy for 2 years. It's PRETTY normal that ONE of the two people in a FWB/F-buddy will develop feelings and it's also pretty typical (judging by all the posts made by women) that MEN are better at keeping emotions ... (read in full...)
Should I text him again or do you think he decided not to meet up with me?
Q. I have a friend who has a gay friend I've met him several times, she ask him if I could tex him, he said sure, we did ,about a month ago, I sent him three tex,s , then I didn't, here back from him, he said we could meet for coffee, I said that would ...
A. 7 June 2018: No I don't think you should text him again.
I get that you are hoping or looking to get a sexual experience out of this - but just because the other guy is a gay man doesn't mean he is interested in you or your "cherry".
It's like ASSuming th... (read in full...)
Why hold a grudge for 3 years, after a crush wasn’t reciprocated?
Q. If someone who had a crush on another person, felt rejected by that person, why would they hold a grudge after 3 years? They did not ask the person out. But dropped "I love you" lines here and there. But this was not taken seriously. So this other ...
A. 7 June 2018: I have a hard time following the question, I'm sorry.
Maybe you can re-submit it in a way so it makes more sense?
... (read in full...)
How do I end this pathetic relationship without him turning it all around on me?
Q. Hi I’ve been in a relationship for 6 years we have a 3 year old daughter together the relationship is pathetic between us there’s no affection he sleeps on the sofa does everything to avoid spending time with us it’s always me doing everything for ...
A. 7 June 2018: Does it matter if he CHOOSES to try and turn it around on you?
YOU know what the real deal is. He is USELESS as a partner. Yes, he works and bring home some money but other than that he has NOTHING to offer. No affection, no help, no support,... (read in full...)
Should I reach out to him again after a long time away?
Q. Hi everyone! While working a contract gig, I developed a huge crush on someone in our building. We chatted a little bit, kind of had lunch once, but our schedules were never consistent. On my last day, he left early. I planned to ask him out for ...
A. 29 May 2018: I agree with the JUST MESSAGE him and see what happens. Just ask him if he is still interested in meeting up for drinks and what day might work for him.
That way he has AMPLE way of showing interest or turning you down politely.
And if he doe... (read in full...)
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