At what age would young couples move in together?
Q. Hello. I am 21 years old and already wanting to settle with my boyfriend. We have made plans in the future to settle and live together as in get an apartment and eventually a house. I am in university full time and seeking part time jobs. We both ...
A. 14 May 2018: Some people as young as you two don't really WANT the responsibilities of being a grown up, just the benefits (if you will). For him, he might also not want to leave his mom or his comfortable home.
I think he is stalling because he isn't READY. S... (read in full...)
Does one mistake break you forever? Even if you've learned from your mistake and would never ever repeat it?
Q. Does one mistake make you broken forever? Even if you've learned from your mistake and would never ever repeat it? My first bf and I were not a good match. Or we were for a codependant relationship. Bit I didn't know that then. Everything was a...
A. 13 May 2018: Of course you can have an opinion, OP
You can even give her advice from PERSONAL experience! You know what cheating did and how it STILL affects you. So yes, you can advice her not to do it and explain why.
Now she may not AGREE with your ... (read in full...)
At what age would young couples move in together?
Q. Hello. I am 21 years old and already wanting to settle with my boyfriend. We have made plans in the future to settle and live together as in get an apartment and eventually a house. I am in university full time and seeking part time jobs. We both ...
A. 13 May 2018: I moved to another country at age 18. Came home a year later and then meet my BF - we moved in together after about 10? months of dating? So at 19 almost 20 for us both. He was in the military and I was in college and working 2-3 weeknights.
It wo... (read in full...)
He cheated on his wife. I don't want to be the next person he hurts
Q. I've been seeing a really great guy who makes me laugh and is fantastic with my son. He is a great dad to his own children with his soon to ex wife, (in the process of getting a divorce), and everything seems perfect. When I first met him through ...
A. 13 May 2018: He can't make a guarantee that he will NEVER hurt you or cheat on you. It would be an semi-empty promise.
Do you need all the sordid details to decide if you want to keep seeing him or not? No, he doesn't OWE you all the details. Besides you woul... (read in full...)
My ex said hurtful things about my body. I'm self conscious and my get up and go has gone
Q. I I hope you guys don't mind me asking for advice. I have been feeling low since splitting with my ex around 5 month ago, I have lost my get up and go and I work and then come home and that's it or I go to bed and fall asleep crying. My ex said I ...
A. 13 May 2018: Work on finding a YOU that you are happy with. A MAN shouldn't be the one to "complete" you as a person. And don go look for a man when you overall feel like shit, because ? The man you will attract is someone who will TREAT you like shit. That is ... (read in full...)
Should I tell my parents I am sexually active?
Q. Okay, I’m 17 and I just lost my virginity about a week ago. My parents don’t know and I’ve had a few of my closest friends tell me that I need to tell my parents. The thing is, I’m terrified that they won’t let me talk to my boyfriend or be with him ...
A. 13 May 2018: Are you on birth-control? Or are you leaving it up to your BF to be in charge of that? (if it's the latter, what will you do when a condom breaks? or you get pregnant?). You need to at least BE responsible. If you are doing a "grown up thing" like ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says he wants to get back together eventually
Q. Background story: My boyfriend and I broke up in what initially was in good terms last month. We were together for 7 years, we were fighting too much and became so busy with our own lives that maybe we drifted away. We figured maybe we needed time ...
A. 13 May 2018: OP,
Do you want to sit on a shelf and WAIT for him to decide if he wants you back or not? And what if he doesn't want you back but doesn't tell you? Then what? You just sit there and wait? Let life drift past you?
You two had a 7 year relations... (read in full...)
My boyfriend said if I don't give him sex he will get it somewhere else!
Q. Am in a relationship from 3year and i never allowed my boyfriend to touch me even and he never had any issue qith it.. He just said me when i'll permittee him to touch myself then only he'll touch otherwise no.... But now after 2years we got a lot ...
A. 13 May 2018: OP, I get that you like this BOY (because he is acting like a 5 year old who wants ONLY what HE wants, not caring about your feelings or wishes) - I think the BEST thing you can do is end it and wish him well.
You shouldn't COMPROMISE your own... (read in full...)
I only hear from him when he is on leave ... I don't want to be his booty call.
Q. to start me and my ex were together for years he joined the army we were together for 2 year of the 3 year enlistment he has, and once he went on deployment, 1 month before he got back he ended it and said it was because he didn't want me waiting ...
A. 13 May 2018: Yep, I agree.
You are in fact ALLOWING this by 1. being available and 2. thinking he wants to get back with you for good.
You say:"something just keeps telling me to not give up on him" but OP - he gave up on you a long while ago. He just str... (read in full...)
My ex-girlfriend's confession has re-opened old wounds
Q. My girlfriend of close to 3 years split up with me a couple of months ago. It felt like a total blindside because I never saw it coming. I haven't taken it well. I've dealt with significant anxiety and depression since. I had asked extensivel...
A. 13 May 2018: OP, she isn't trying to get you bet, she is trying to assuage her own guilt for what she did to you.
She CAN NOT be your friend and you can't trust her as a partner either.
My guess is part of her attraction to the guy has to do with her biol... (read in full...)
No sex since getting back together
Q. I've been seeing this guy for a while now. On several occasions we broke up for about a week or two at a time. The last time we broke up it seemed we were really over with. A chick messaged me to tell me that whenever we break up they talk, that she ...
A. 13 May 2018: Could he have a STD?
Why not just ASK him?
He is probably the one who can answer this.
If you can't TALK to him about sex, how can you have sex with a guy?... (read in full...)
LDR Should I Ask Why He Hid His Profile? Need Advice
Q. I’ve been talking to a guy on a dating site for 3 weeks now. He is long distance so we have not been able to meet. We were supposed to meet recently and he had to cancel but he’s working on rescheduling for 3 weeks from now. We have had a very good ...
A. 13 May 2018: Maybe he is focusing on you?
It's only been 3 weeks, I'd try not to let your imagination take over here.
He can do whatever HE wants with his profile.
SLOW down.
If he cancels again, you wish him well, block him and move on.
... (read in full...)
I feel like I’m being jerked around and not sure what to do
Q. Dating dilemma. Met a woman online about a month ago. She lives about 100 Miles from me and we seemed to hit it off and met up for a date, and I went there and spent the weekend with her. We had a great time and she said she was very interested ...
A. 12 May 2018: I agree with N91,
Give yourself a time limit and see what happens. Pull back a bit and see if she takes initiative to meet up again or not.
Honestly, though?
It sounds like she is looking to see what else is out there and keeping you as... (read in full...)
Is he playing games? How can I heal and also hurt him?
Q. Guys I seriously need help.please read whole. I need help. I know this guy since the past 1.5 years, we started off as friends but then three four months into the frndship he told me he liked me. I had another friend (female) who had a crush ...
A. 12 May 2018: Yes, you should listen to your friends, the guy is an immature turd who is playing mind games. He is toxic.
And no, you shouldn't try and hurt him back.
TWO wrongs NEVER make a right.
You should instead CUT him off completely. BLOCK and DE... (read in full...)
Does one mistake break you forever? Even if you've learned from your mistake and would never ever repeat it?
Q. Does one mistake make you broken forever? Even if you've learned from your mistake and would never ever repeat it? My first bf and I were not a good match. Or we were for a codependant relationship. Bit I didn't know that then. Everything was a...
A. 12 May 2018: At some point you have to realize that beating yourself up for something you did when you were 21 - is pointless.
DID you learn something from it? Have you remained faithful ever since?
If you can say YES to both of those, maybe it's time ... (read in full...)
How do I deal with my arrogant, moody colleague?
Q. How do you deal with a moody colleague? I have been with a law firm and my colleague (on my team) has an attitude. He is the possible office hunk - another girl loves to give him attention and so does another colleague - he is attractive I admit I ...
A. 12 May 2018: I agree with Code Warrior,
No special treatment, he doesn't warrant it. Just be professional and treat him like EVERYONE else in the office/team.
As for his private/personal life - it's none of your business or your problem. If he is unhappy at... (read in full...)
What did his messages mean? Is he interested or not?
Q. Hi all, So I recently got back on the dating scene and there's this guy a friend of a friend that I've been texting for a while, we both seem keen on each other. I met up with a few weeks ago and ended up kissing him. We then decided to go on...
A. 12 May 2018: I think it's a little too soon to be asking what he thinks of you. You know, texting back and forth is nice but it's NOT a great way to really get to know someone.
So go out (and HOLD OFF on sex for now) after this evening and gig LEAVE it up to... (read in full...)
I have a phobia of wasps and it's consuming me!
Q. This isn't a relationship question, but I have a huge dilemma and I need some advice. I have a phobia of wasps, such a severe phobia that it's not rational. If I truly had a medical condition, then it would be rational, but I'm healthy and don'...
A. 12 May 2018: EDIT...
You are not alone and it can't get better.
SHOULD have been:
You are not alone and it can get better. Because of course it CAN!
... (read in full...)
I have a phobia of wasps and it's consuming me!
Q. This isn't a relationship question, but I have a huge dilemma and I need some advice. I have a phobia of wasps, such a severe phobia that it's not rational. If I truly had a medical condition, then it would be rational, but I'm healthy and don'...
A. 12 May 2018: Argh! Who isn't terrified of wasps?! I think it's inherently sensible to be scared of certain things/bugs/etc. I think it's a primal instinct. However when it takes control over your life it becomes out of control.
I would look into finding ... (read in full...)
I initiated a threesome with a guy friend and now my wife is having an affair with him
Q. I just found out that my wife has been having an affair for the past two years with a single male friend of ours who we had a drunken threesome with two years ago..that threesome which was totally initiated by me alone wasnt so fullfilling for me, ...
A. 12 May 2018: I agree with Code Warrior,
This is one of the more COMMON outcome when adding more people to a marriage (or relationship) bed. ONE or the other partner "can't" just stop at having sex with the added person.
And this was a HARD lesson for you t... (read in full...)
Why does being a mistress feel worse than being alone?
Q. I 've been seeing a man who lives with his common law wife and their toddler twin boys. I believed he will leave his live in Significant other as he promised and it would turn into something more . Well it seems like he was in strictly for sex.He n...
A. 12 May 2018: I think it hurts because you are constantly reminded that you are NOT his priority, you value as a woman is "lower" than that of his wife, his time is what's valuable for him, getting HIS pleasure is more important to him and probably even the ... (read in full...)
Why did he invite me, then say nothing about me going with him?
Q. I’ve been seeing a guy for almost 4 mths. I’ve met his friends but not yet his family. From what he has said they know about me and he’s tried to introduce us before, however that was about 2 mths ago, which I felt to soon. He has met some of my f...
A. 11 May 2018: I would just go with the flow.
Personally, I don't think it's a good idea for him to bring you to his daughter's 21st as the FIRST time for you to meet her. Her birthday is about HER, not your BF and you. And I can easily see how that can sour any... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and his ex are "best friends" and keep saying that they love each other!
Q. My boyfriends ex is starting to make me have uneasy. Feelings. They were only married two years and had no children together. She did bring a two year old little girl into the marriage. They fought all the time and she wanted out and filed for ...
A. 11 May 2018: I'd say try the meeting her. If she is just TOO much over him or it seems like THEY are the couple and you the spectator, then YOU have to decide if you want to continue dating a man who makes you LESS of a priority than his ex-now/friend whom he ... (read in full...)
How I can become a better partner in the future and avoid temptation to cheat?
Q. Hi everyone, I just broke up with my boyfriend because I cheated on him and had a one night stand with a guy friend. Long story short, my boyfriend was a rebound and he knew it. Before my boyfriend, my ex cheated on me and it really broke my ...
A. 11 May 2018: My advice?
No, I don't think you should tell a new potential partner ALL about your past and mistakes. It's OK to say I have made mistakes in the past but you don't owe a guy a play-by -play of all the dump stuff you have done.
A new guy is ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and his ex are "best friends" and keep saying that they love each other!
Q. My boyfriends ex is starting to make me have uneasy. Feelings. They were only married two years and had no children together. She did bring a two year old little girl into the marriage. They fought all the time and she wanted out and filed for ...
A. 11 May 2018: I think it sounds a bit odd. Honestly... but some people can really CARE for someone and NOT want to BE with that person in a relationship but wanting to keep them around. While I don't think it's all that healthy for anyone, that is how some people ... (read in full...)
Was I doing to right thing to cut him off? Was I being not "open-minded"?
Q. I recently stopped being friends with a guy (let's called him C) for several reasons. I knew him for 5 years. He said we are friends but every time we see each other, we end up making our or sleeping with each other. I told him I don't do friends...
A. 10 May 2018: I think you need to look at your own actions more than his.
YOU are not single, he is NOT a friend.
When you MAKE the choice to sleep with someone you call a friend, it's no longer a friendship as physical intimacy and romantic emotion... (read in full...)
Why does my ex treat me this way?
Q. My ex treated me very badly and we split in new year. Anyway I got Radom texts from him saying he loved me and missed me and then last night I kept getting "accidental" texts from him which was clearly for someone eles so I texted and said you text ...
A. 10 May 2018: Why do you ALLOW him to still have contact with you?
If he treated you so badly, why have you not CUT him off?
As for why you didn't see or notice he was doing drugs while he was with you, well maybe it's partly denial? and maybe because yo... (read in full...)
He’s been giving me gifts and I don’t know how to deal with this!
Q. I have a guy who I started chatting on Instagram ( just innocent ) anyway we chatted back and forth for weeks and he asked to meet for a coffee somewhere so I did, he is a nice guy but not my type, we get on as friends, anyway after out coffee he ...
A. 10 May 2018: I agree with Code Warrior,
TELL him that you CAN NOT and WILL not accepts any more gifts. And if he can not respect that, you can not be friends.
And honestly, OP... YOU are old enough to say no, thanks and stick to it.
Next time you meet up... (read in full...)
He had panic attacks, couldn’t eat and lost weight when I tried to end our relationship! What do I do?
Q. I have been seeing this man for 2 years, met him online and it is a long distance relationship as we don’t see each other regularly, only twice a month which was ok with me....Anyway he started talking about having a future together... to move away ...
A. 10 May 2018: OP, you can't date someone out of PITY.
I get that you feel bad that you mentioning breaking up affected him, but by STRINGING him along (and you ARE doing that right now as you don't love him and you don't want a future with him) THAT is even mor... (read in full...)
Why do men never seen interested in me?
Q. I am 22 and I am about to graduate college this fall. I have never dated anyone or had a boyfriend. I am never asked out, approached, and I am almost never hit on by men. I have tried joining some organizations on campus to get to know a few gu...
A. 9 May 2018: When you DO show interest in a guy, how do you go about it? Do you back away if they don't seem to respond to what you are doing? Or do you keep at it?
I have seen women who does a complete 180 when a guy enters the room, they becomes fake and... (read in full...)
Insensitive, rude, pushy student is getting me in trouble for not wanting to be his friend
Q. I have a problem where something that happened in my personal life has spilled over into work-study (at college) and it's gotten me into trouble. I'm especially in trouble because I refuse to apologize and kiss the butt of the person I really don't ...
A. 9 May 2018: IF you still have the e-mails, keep them. Print them out if you have to. GO talk to whomever you work for at the Learning Center. Explain what happened without going into too many details. While they might WANT everyone to just get along and play ... (read in full...)
Will my boyfriend come back to me?
Q. So my boyfriend well ex dumped me around two weeks ago out of the blue and of course i broke the no contact rule and texted him like five days after but it's been a week since we last communicated, But he left due to stress and his life being a mess ...
A. 9 May 2018: Probably not.
If he is having so much on his plate that he can't handle both stress AND a GF - he has already chosen to focus on the stress, not the GF. And if this is stress over school, career, sports etc. then that SHOULD be his focus NOT a GF... (read in full...)
Anyone else developed a conscience when they were about to start a FWB with a married person?
Q. Ok so I have been single over 6 years, I like being single, I have no one to answer too. But it's been a long time intimately just over 2 years! So I'm on a dating site, not looking for a quick bunk up but maybe friendship or fwb. I met this bloke ...
A. 8 May 2018: Consider this, OP
At some point in life you MIGHT want a long term partner and I can tell you more MEN will not really WANT to date a woman who CHOSE to be a mistress to some horny married man. Many guys don't WANT a partner who lacks common s... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says it’s time for me to give him my virginity!
Q. My boyfriend tell me it's time to give your virginity I cannot wait it's has been 10 months we are together I know he is my boyfriend and has the right but am scared of my parent if one day know about it ?? my boyfriend don't have a good job my ...
A. 7 May 2018: You don't sound ready at all. Not for sex, and I think you need to be honest about that with your BF.
He isn't OWED sex from you. He spend 10 months with you so far and no sex, so what's the hurry now?
I think you might want to consider that th... (read in full...)
Should I have said something when he put his arm around me?
Q. So...went on my first one-on-one date ever the other day and it was with a guy 5 years older than me. Despite my age, I have no dating experience whatsoever. And what's worse, I'm not the most affectionate person. Hand-holding, hugging, "i Love ...
A. 7 May 2018: Do you need to explain to an ALMOST stranger that you are not a tactile person?
No.
However, If someone TOUCHES you and it makes uncomfortable, it IS OK to say - I'm not a very tactile person and it takes a while for me to be comfortable with... (read in full...)
He love-bombed me but now has cut ties! Should I hold out hope?
Q. I have recently started seeing a guy, who suffers with depression, which ive supported as much as i can. Our relationship has been moving very quickly and he recently dropped the love bomb, involved me deeply with his friends and family but He has ...
A. 7 May 2018: You should move on.
No one can sustain the amount of attention, flowery prose and FAKE feelings for long. That is why is called "love bombing". Because they dump a butt-load of what seems like positive attention, affection and words and then the... (read in full...)
Is having a child something that you can end up thinking wow this is the best thing I have ever done or do you stick with your gut feeling?
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together for 5 years and are just in the process of buying a house. She is wanting to have children in the next 2 years. The problem is I have never really been interested in having a child. I have a good job which I ...
A. 7 May 2018: Well, you HAVE to make a choice here.
Because it's SELFISH of you to STAY with your GF if SHE wants kids and you don't.
And I think it's a bit reckless to HAVE kids JUST to keep your GF. Kids are for life.
You might NOT change how you feel ... (read in full...)
I’ve given up drinking! How do I tell my friend before his bachelor party?
Q. When I was in my early 20s and mid 20s, I was a heavy drinker. I would not considered myself an alcoholic but I was a drunk. After a really bad experience about six years ago (I was lucky I did not die from alcohol poisoning), I decided that I ...
A. 7 May 2018: Tell him.
And stick to non alcoholic drinks that night. Don't let anyone push you to drink alcohol. Be firm and simply stick to the no, alcohol for me.
You CAN do it.
Been in the same position as you (though I wasn't a drunk per say but I ha... (read in full...)
I'm tired of my ex's manipulative behavior
Q. What should I do? I was in a long term relationship and got dumped the other month, I got lots of abusive texts saying disgusting things about me and then the next I was getting texts saying miss you and love you, I replied and got ignored for days ...
A. 5 May 2018: JUST block him !
He is an ex for a reason, he seems like a loser too. WHAT is there for you to hold on to?
Sure you want closure, but HE isn't going to give you that. YOU have to find that for yourself. And really giving all his antics, nast... (read in full...)
We are having a baby but he refuses to talk about marriage
Q. My boyfriend and I of seven months are now having a baby. It was not planned. He talks about a future with me. He has been married before. I have also. He never wants to get married again. He wants to get a home together. He has told me he ...
A. 5 May 2018: Why bring it up again?
He has ALREADY stated that he IS NOT getting married again. Do you think by asking over and over that HE will change his mind? Because he won't.
So you have to decide do you want a partner YOU are not married to but w... (read in full...)
Partner of 5 years lied about a 'friendship and now I feel like I'm blowing things out of proportion
Q. Hi agony aunts and uncles. I've been a long time reader and love seeing your advice and views. I never once dreamed I'd be writing in and asking for advice. So where to begin. It's currently 2.30 am where I am and this has just happened in the ...
A. 5 May 2018: I think there is more to this "friendship" than he was telling.
I have male friends but my husband KNOWS them. Talk to them and have MET all of them.
My husband has female coworkers get gets along well with who occasionally text or call to ... (read in full...)
Why did our date not work out?
Q. A few weeks ago I went on a date with this guy. He wanted to take me out for about 3-4 years and I was always so uninterested. He grew up to be a nice gentleman. During our date he was super funny, and sweet. We had a lot in common and we talked ...
A. 5 May 2018: You went on ONE date and the week after you two fell out?
Yeah, I don't see this leading to anything great. Though you don't mention what you fell out over so that CAN be an indicator as to whether there is a future here or not..
My thing thou... (read in full...)
I don't want to throw 5 years down the pan but I don't know what else to do. Can you offer any advice?
Q. Hi, I'm facing a bit of a crossroads in my life and I'm hoping you guys can help me as you've helped me so many times before. I've been with my BF for 5 and a half years. On our 5 year anniversary he proposed and I said yes. We've talked abo...
A. 4 May 2018: Amen to Code Warrior's reply.
You think because you have invested 5 YEARS with this guy you now have NO OTHER options?
He sounds like a piece of shit BF! I wouldn't date someone who did all these things to me, let alone MARRY him.
Instead ... (read in full...)
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