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Why does my brother think I owe him something when he is living with me for free?

Tagged as: Family, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (4 February 2013) 3 Answers - (Newest, 4 February 2013)
A female United States age 51-59, anonymous writes:

Hello Cupid , I have a question for you my mom fell really sick like seven months or so ago my brother moved back from X to come back and help me with my mom. But when he get in good his help begin to slow down.My mom is late for doctors appointments now he barely wants to take her and she really needs to see her doctors every week to see how her amputations are healing my mom is diabetic.We work at the same place he doesn't want to contribute to no bills only thing he wants to is eat his money up,spend it on women and other things .Today I told him to get his shit out of my house and go move somewhere else I don't need this he seems to think I am depending on him for his car I'm not I have one just can't drive it right now.Am I being heartless for making him get his things and get out even though he know my mom needs his help?

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (4 February 2013):

Honeypie agony auntI think you are doing the right thing. I'd kick him out too. I would look into "recruiting" other people to help with driving your mom.

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A female reader, TasteofIndia United States +, writes (4 February 2013):

TasteofIndia agony auntYes, you're doing the right thing. You're not being heartless - it's your home, and he is being more of an inconvenience than helpful. Perhaps you could apologize for snapping at him (you're stuck with family, so you might as well leave things on a more positive note), but still firmly tell him that he has to move out and that you're ready for your privacy again.

Best of luck to you and swift healing to your Mother!

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A female reader, jadedpearl United States +, writes (4 February 2013):

jadedpearl agony auntNo, you are not being heartless. He is a grown man, if he does not want to share the responsibility of taking care of your mother then KICK HIM OUT. He is free loading off of you big time and you have let him get away with it for far too long!

Sadly, this is what it is going to be like when my mother is of old age, all of the burden will be put on my shoulders and my brother (my only sibling) will help with nothing. Good luck to you and wish your mother the best. You did the right thing.

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