I love my husband but don't know how long I can keep carrying everything on my back!
Q. Not sure if this is really a question or just needing to vent but I could use some advice. I'm just feeling very worthless in my marriage. I feel like he's always mad at me and my kids and nothing we do is ever good enough. Like I go shopping after ...
A. 15 April 2017: Role reversal never sits well with most men as they're usually the breadwinner and leave the ever important nurturing to his spouse. Sure enough it's still a team effort in any marriage when times are tested... the true colours of who we really ... (read in full...)
Money is tight. Lots of financial pressure. How do I get him to see that he doesn't have enough money to attend the car race ?
Q. Been with my fiance for 3 years. Currently We are BROKE. Had to cancel wedding (was meant to be next month) can't even elope cause we have no money for that. I had celebrant asking when we are putting deposit down and my fiance said "we need to ...
A. 15 April 2017: I don’t see him as having any priorities if he takes food from the family table and spends that money on a week-end away for himself.
As much as we all need a break to recharge our batteries, the trouble with having financial issues such as yours... (read in full...)
Should I write another letter to my ex?
Q. We were together for 2 years. He was very special to me. He was my first everything. Our breakup happened in very complicated situation , i went through a miscarriage. I thought he was not giving me the support i needed . He thought i was very ...
A. 6 April 2017: Enough is enough, what is done is done... do not torture yourself and him for the past by writing another letter. He will not hate you for life; he has his own demons, guilt for his behaviour to bear. Be that now or later as Karma dictates.
Let i... (read in full...)
Worried my husband doesn't think I'm attractive
Q. Am I wrong to be upset that I don't think my husband finds me physically attractive? I think he married me for reasons other than appearance like that we get on and that we have similar values, wanting a family and same financial goals etc. He often ...
A. 5 April 2017: Put the shoe on the other foot and ask yourself would you rather a husband have similar values, wanting a family and same financial goals etc. like you OR a foolish husband that’s so gorgeous looking yet fights regularly with you?
Your husband ... (read in full...)
His sister is so negative, how can we put a stop to this madness?
Q. i have been with my current boyfriend for 16 yrs. his sister calls from time to time and when she does she always dumps her problems on him, always negative for as long as i have known her, he gives her advise on how to better her life but she ...
A. 5 April 2017: He need not give his sister advice and she need not take it either, because all she wants is a listening ear from her brother whom she evidently misses because he's moved away. If he's the only family she has I understand why she turns to him.
... (read in full...)
Does sex life decline after a few years? She didn't complain initially.
Q. Does sex life tend to decline after a few years? My girlfriend was virgin when she met me. She used to love sex, was extremely naughty and used to want it more than me. Now few years later she isn't really up for it. She says it not me, she does...
A. 5 April 2017: Goodness gracious; she doesn't move at all!? It's no wonder there's a decline in sex... it's so weird no-one has made her wake-up and realise this is not right!? I know there’s her inexperience and we all go through phases but this does not make a ... (read in full...)
He makes me feel rejected. Can anyone offer me some perspective on this situation?
Q. Hello aunts. I would really appreciate some advice please. I have been in a relationship for seven months now, and we see each other weekly as we live a little way from each other. In the main we are good together. There is lots of contact betwe...
A. 5 April 2017: My man was not initially the touchy feely type unless it was foreplay. He's a genius in that department so go figure!? Nonetheless you may have to persevere until your man gets the message.
Fact is you live apart, see each other weekly which is... (read in full...)
My ex said he wanted us to be together. A week later he said he didn't mean it like that. I'm angry and confused.
Q. He’s 28, I’m 27. We were together 4 years and he left me 6 months ago. He's now in a relationship an 18 year old. He’s kept in touch with me all the time since our break up (always him initiating). Last week he told me he misses me and that he k...
A. 1 April 2017: He initiates contact with you because he finds his rebound 18 year old GF boring and unfulfilling. There's only so much bimbo a man can take before he starts to reflect what he had. A person comes to realise what that other person meant to them ... (read in full...)
I ratted out my friends for cheating. Did I do the wrong thing?
Q. I'm in college and recently we had our finals exam for calculus, I studied my absolute hardest and I know I still get didn't enough right answers to pass, after the exam I find out that some of my classmates were using a facebook group chat to share ...
A. 30 March 2017: Those cheating classmates are laughing at all who study hard for their exams. It’s not a nice feeling to discover those giving answers to one another while we answer exams on our own merit.
What you did took courage yet you feel guilt about yo... (read in full...)
How can I stop living in the past and stop worrying?
Q. Hello everyone, how does someone stop living in the past , it seems like my life is a contact worry, I can't escape my own "prison" I always worry about what other people think of me , constant non stop, whether it's a work, at home , with friends...
A. 28 March 2017: If you say "you can't put into practice what you hear" it begs further clarification. Is that because; you can't or won't as there is a difference? “Can’t” implies you have a limitation, or not skilled; “won’t” is by choosing not to do something ... (read in full...)
I feel trapped, I want him to move out but he has no money!
Q. Dear Cupid My boyfriend is 45 and we have been together for a few years. I am aware that he likes to drink and we have had some arguments about this and I have told him I respect his right to make his own choices but a life which focuses on alcoh...
A. 27 March 2017: No one person with substance abuse issues gets better with people enabling them! That strangely includes you being afraid for him, thinking he can't pay rent elsewhere. Sometimes if not always; caring for someone with this condition only cripples ... (read in full...)
How should we respond? My husband's ex has threatened to abandon the children on our doorstep, if we don't agree to take them at a time convenient for her.
Q. We could do with some help solving a problem please. My husband has recently been made redundant(with one week pay) and was offered an opportunity to go on a course to improve his skills and at the end, secure a new job which he was so excited a...
A. 14 March 2017: Clearly the EX is a bytch, I get that! However what would your plan be if this was a freak emergency situation regarding the EX; like a car crash, or perhaps something less dramatic like an operation she had to have (to remove stupidity) and the ... (read in full...)
Why can't she see he is not a good person? Do I just leave her to get on with things? Since she is not listening
Q. Hello. My good close friend who is 27 has had a rough few years. Her Mother passed away, the Father of her 2 kids left her (he still regularly sees the children) She has begun having a relationship (now 10 months and I have met him once) with someo...
A. 14 March 2017: It baffles me too, yet something tells me she's not too smart, has low self-esteem and makes very poor choices in life if she needs to ask; "if this was OK behaviour" about her BF.
It'd be interesting to know how the Father of her 2 kids compares... (read in full...)
His behaviour has broken my trust in people
Q. Hello everyone. I hope you're doing well this Sunday. I was recently in a 3 year relationship. This whole time I thought I had a sweet, brutally honest, loyal, friend, lover, team mate. Everything came crashing down. Turned out he was not loyal or...
A. 13 March 2017: The guy is an utter COWARD; a 2 faced sneaky liar who hasn’t the guts to speak his mind civilly when there’s something bothering him. Yelling an inch from your face is a sign he treats you with contempt and definitely shows he cannot communicate ... (read in full...)
I'm troubled by my boyfriend's spiteful side
Q. My boyfriend and I went on holiday recently and we missed our flight as we both got the return flight date wrong. We travel on the bus to the airport to see if we can get another flight. I had a leg injury. Our suitcase fell of the baggage ...
A. 10 March 2017: It's a red flag indeed; you both got the return date wrong yet he's angry at you, you're injured, asked for help and all he gives in return is the silent treatment.
I can see it'll be a 'glorious life', an emotional roller-coaster of fits and... (read in full...)
I can't help feeling that I'm his second choice!
Q. My boyfriend always tells me that he knew from our first date that I was special and a keeper. I recently found out we had our first date, then he went out with another women the next day and had been chasing this women before and after we first...
A. 10 March 2017: This is so tainted it's colour is RED!
But you got to laugh at the pathetic excuse he pulled; "his phone must have searched itself" What a flimsy piece of BS that is. I'm sure you where not born yesterday to believe this.
Be that it was earl... (read in full...)
I like this guy but he just doesn't have a clue about women
Q. I am seeing a guy who is into porn and hasn't had much experience with women. It feels like he doesn't know the difference between porn and being with a real women. He's not romantic at all, doesn't make the effort to make me feel special,...
A. 10 March 2017: Of course there's no foreplay, romance or respect... You dished out sex full throttle to a porn addict, in so much "he couldn't keep up with you sexually", and now complain he stares and expects you to service him like in those unrealistic porn ... (read in full...)
He's so unhygienic it's putting me off him, am I being unreasonable?
Q. I have been dating for over a year. In the early days he was relatively tidy.The guy is increasingly becoming a slob. His whole place is like a teenages bedroom clothes, rushbish, hangers, money etc chucked on the floor, plates piled up in the ...
A. 10 March 2017: So he was relatively tidy in the beginning I wonder what switched him off from cleaning cause it smells like he might be depressed or just moved out from Mommy's home?
If there's no legitimate cause, like unemployment or an illness then he's sim... (read in full...)
My boyfriend said my genes were inferior and any flaws would come from me
Q. Boyfriend of almost two years and I were watching a movie (Harry Potter) and I was jokingly saying that I would name our future son Albus cause he was a bad-ass. My boyfriend said it'd be too much pressure for a kid to live up to. I laughed and ...
A. 10 March 2017: Typical Slytherin BF; only they would make insensitive remarks like that about your genes being inferior... Remember Hermione Granger of muggle descent; she was thought inferior by a certain Slytherin character for not being born pure-blood.
... (read in full...)
My boyfriend charged me for work he did for me. Should he have after everything I have done for him?
Q. I have been dating a guy for almost a year. He is going to massage school and has jobs here and there. He lives with a family member. I have helped him lots of times with homework. I recently bought a new car and gave him my old car, because he ...
A. 7 March 2017: Romeo needs to understand and be taught what it means to RECIPROCATE a kindness! Sounds like he's been spoiled by you?
Girl you're a very generous giving person from what you write... This of course has pit falls in being taken for granted ... (read in full...)
I know I can't get involved but how do I deal with my feelings?
Q. I started a job 3 months ago the same time as a male colleague who is a few years older than me. Over time we have chatted and I have found myself attracted to him. I get from his body language that he likes me too. He gazes at me when he talks or ...
A. 5 March 2017: Stop the dang PRESS... Husband looks after his own children when the wife goes off to work! What will these men whinge about next to get a pretty colleagues attention?
Girl this guy is or maybe coming on to you, sucking you in, bitching about lo... (read in full...)
She has no idea her ex cheated on her often! Should I tell her?
Q. I'm in a very very sticky situation. I have 2 very close friends. 1 who is male the other is female. Both of the 2 used to date for over 4 years, they had just recently broke up about 9 months ago and I was always very close with the male. He was ...
A. 5 March 2017: I think you've grown a conscience too late... it comes AFTER her 'best friends' have done things with her ex, when they were together! While this sleazy cheating act was being done behind her back, the group kept silent.
I don't know what typ... (read in full...)
Hard for me to sort out my feelings
Q. I'm in a difficult situation. I went out with my ex on and off for 15 months. He is very stubborn, and we hardly saw or spoke to each other. I have been friends with someone that he knows for a while. They aren't very close friends, but have known ...
A. 4 March 2017: You could be sending mixed messages to the EX especially when you've seen him off and on in the last 15 months. Even though the EX is frustrating and stubborn, he's been filling a void in your life?
To me it's about loneliness, not letting ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend never thinks I am beautiful!
Q. My boyfriend of 2 yrs never thinks I am beautiful. But I feel I do look good. And he says that you always need to love a person who will be with you no matter what you look like. He does fantasise about actress but he never cheats on me..I am just ...
A. 4 March 2017: I don't quite understand what he's saying... but if you find yourself beautiful then that's all that matters to keeping your self-esteem.
If he compares you to actress and says things like why don't you fix your make-up, and hair like her, the... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and I are in a good place, but his mother doesn't me!
Q. Hi all. It might be a long one so I'm really sorry. I'll set te scene a little bit. I've been with my boyfriend for nearly 2 years. We are saving for a house but are both currently living with our parents. A while back (probably 6 months ago) we had ...
A. 4 March 2017: Please understand his Mother probably turns you away because she doesn't want the petty arguments disrupting her household. Although when you had that initial big fight 6 months ago, he still could have come to the door, gone for a walk with you and ... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend being truthful about his parents?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for a little over three years now. He's currently in his forties. We broke up last year for about a month because he and I talked about getting married but then when we actually started trying to pick a date he told me ...
A. 4 March 2017: Girl the issue isn't about his parents, your lack of passion or not doing it (sex) enough... he sucked you in with having more sex because he was missing it (sex and you) during the breakup.
The man has one BS excuse after another; delay tactics ... (read in full...)
Did this guy actually love her? Or did he just want to have sex with her, despite her telling him that she was not ready for sex ?
Q. Hi.i know someone whose boyfriend broke up with her cause she could not have sex with him. Before she accepted to date him she told him and he accepted. Along the line he started really talking about it saying he thought she will let him have sex...
A. 3 March 2017: He's a user! If your friend doesn't have sex with him, he wants to be allowed to have sex with other girls. This is not dating, being in a relationship or love... it's being used as his toilet.
Your friend would do well to flush him into the sewe... (read in full...)
Does his behavior indicate that he's an emotional abuser? Should I breakup with him?
Q. 1-) In life, we should have certain words filtered, my boyfriend does not seem to have one. I am upset because, he has this tendency of referring to woman as bi***es, ”oh tha b*tch does this or that, in a very despotic way, he does not say this all ...
A. 3 March 2017: IF those are his sentiments regarding women; next time when he makes such a comment, I'd ask him, does that include his and your Mother being bytches?
I wager this guy has a deep down resentment towards women for some reason, that you need not... (read in full...)
Disappointed he couldn't see me Valentine's day. Am I being selfish? Should I try and make things work?
Q. I'm 38 and have been dating a guy who is 38 as well. Our first date was Nov 5th last year and we've seen each other every weekend since then and sometimes during the week. He is part of a culture that does not honour pagan holidays...and I am fine ...
A. 15 February 2017: He's certainly no Romeo by the sounds of things so far, which is something you evidently need, want and like in a man? It also appears he's not making you feel special, wooed, orgasmic and prioritised on any other day of the year either.
Cultu... (read in full...)
How do I deal with this? Whenever I invite a friend over she invariably does not show up
Q. I have a friend I've known for several years. She has a very frustrating habit in which she will set a day with me to meet up, and then not show up. I really don't understand how you can simply disregard to tell a person you are not coming and let ...
A. 9 February 2017: I think this friendship is based and run on her terms and that you may depend on having her friendship more than she depends on having yours if you keep putting up with her disregard for you.
Obviously there’s no genuine consideration whatsoev... (read in full...)
He is still under her thumb. What can I do?
Q. Hello, I am slightly put off and rather upset at the moment. I live in a small town with my boyfriend of almost six years, and he... Well he is always dragging me over to his ex's place, making me spend the night, doing all her "to do" lists, and ...
A. 15 January 2017: Consider yourself lucky that you can see whats going on between him and his Ex because you're dragged over by him and made to spend the night. How many girlfriends such as yourself can actually say and see nothing is going on between them; I mean ... (read in full...)
Would you tolerate a man calling you extremely derogatory, filthy name during arguments?
Q. Would you talk with a man who calls you a c....t during arguments ? He seems to think this is acceptable and rarely apologises . Even if he does , it happens again the very next time we argue . I've had enough and my confidence is completely shot . ...
A. 9 January 2017: If this sort of abnormal name calling behaviour is all one has grown up with, experienced and tolerated in life, only then this would be normal as they'd know no different.
Given a healthy respectful loving relationship, name calling is totally ... (read in full...)
Is my fiance's contact with his ex's normal? He has been married 3 times.
Q. I'm a divorced woman who was married for 27 years. I got married at 17, so I've had little relationship experience. I've been divorced for just under 2 years now. I have a boyfriend who I just said yes to marrying. What bothers me about my fian...
A. 23 December 2016: I'd want to know the primary reason for his 3 divorces and how long did he wait and remarry? It appears he can’t go without a woman as ANY WOMAN will do to give him comfort. In my books 3 times is a looser and I'd be extremely cautious of jumping ... (read in full...)
We disagree about matter of religion! Any advice?
Q. Hi everyone! I thought it might be a good idea to hear some impartial opinions on an issue I have been dealing with in my relationship. So my boyfriend and I are both Christian, though I only decided to be baptized when i was 14 while he ...
A. 20 December 2016: In practice, a Christening at birth is a blessing for parents to publicly bring their child before the congregation of God’s people to commit themselves to raising their child in accordance with God’s will. Parents dedicate to raise their child in a ... (read in full...)
What shall I put on my ex- husband's headstone?
Q. My ex- husband passed away two years ago, he was a doctor and I am going to order his headstone. I am not sure what to put on because we were divorced. I am re-married again. We remained good friends. He did not really have any family just two cous...
A. 19 December 2016: If it were me I'd start with the headstone reading his full name and doctorate degrees abbreviated afterwards.
If he had a particular interest or wit you could place a singular line that would best quote/reflect his sentiment or philosop... (read in full...)
I found out he's communicating with his ex. What now?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 5 months and I couldn't be happier. We are so compatible and i feel like i've known him for years. He treats me very well and is the gentleman of my dreams. However, i would like opinion on a dilemma i have...
A. 14 December 2016: There’s a few of reasons/excuses for Ex’s to remain in contact:
One - They have children together which is a given right to be in contact.
Secondly - Someone is not over the relationship OR ready to move on
Thirdly - As it is in this case there’s... (read in full...)
I feel put off by the way he lost his virginity!
Q. I just found out my boyfriend lost his virginity to a prostitute, it wasnt on a lads holiday or anything he did it to lose his virginity. Is it wrong that i feel put off by this? ...
A. 14 December 2016: Fact and point of the matter is he did not bother to wait or value keeping his virginity for someone special as I believe it’s meant to be. He did exploit and pay another human being for sex which is not considered an honourable personal ... (read in full...)
It's not really a relationship anymore. Do I stay or Do I go?
Q. Dear Cupid, I am in a long term relationship of over 3 years, my man and I have both different careers and are both in University- we do see each other as much as possible. But the romance is dead- I've never been taken on a date, I can't re...
A. 13 December 2016: I understand you want to care and protect him from this big harsh world, but you're not helping him stand on his own two feet if you do most things for him. You are also not getting what you want out of life at your young age either.
You'r... (read in full...)
I know I should end things but I can't imagine him not being in my life
Q. I've been in a relationship with someone for almost 14 years. We became engaged in 2014. There are so many problems with this relationship it is impossible to list. Starting with alcoholism (him), cheating (him), lies (him), etc. I am no angel but ...
A. 12 December 2016: Girl you must be delusional, out of your mind if you think this is unconditional love! He’s keeping you hostage because he knows you’re too insecure to leave him when you have and give plenty of reason to leave.
Truly who cares if he’s a narcissi... (read in full...)
Dogs versus the Christmas with family? I'm so angry right now, what do I do? I'm 32.
Q. I'm so annoyed right now. I've invited my parents to my house for Christmas but they've declined because I won't allow them to bring their dogs. They have 3 huge dogs and I don't want them in my house. I cannot believe they would rather sit alon...
A. 12 December 2016: It definitely appears that you, their grand-kids are at the bottom of the wolf pack. 2 hours if that is definitely doable for any dog lover in their right mind to go visit. It makes me wonder, how the heck do your parents go shopping or see a doctor ... (read in full...)
Suspicious my boyfriend might be talking to other women
Q. I live with my boyfriend. I noticed his battery lost 10 % battery power overnight. Is this possible when you do not use the phone? I ask because it has happened twice this week. He said it just fell off the charger. It has never happened before....
A. 5 December 2016: If you suspect or worry about him talking to other women, then why not go the whole way and get evidence?
It'll be found in his Call Logs on those dates the phone fell off the charger.
Other than that, tape the dang phone to the charger or p... (read in full...)
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