| Latest articles: Retroactive jealousy, the missing tip
This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
17 January 2016: If you are reading this you know there's a lot of stuff in the net about Retroactive Jealousy. As someone who's gone through that decades ago I've read a hundreds of articles and discussion about it myself. There is a lot of misguided advice, and ...
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I'm having trouble performing, but she say's I'm the best
Q. Hello, I am new to this, I had sex with my girlfriend for the first time a few nights ago but I couldn't get erect at all when I got near her Vagina but when we kissed I got hard, she gave me a blowjob and a handjob, but still couldn't get it up or ...
A. 2 March 2011: Most guys have this problem when starting to have sex. It's obvious you were nervous and that's why you lost your erection. It could take you more that two more tries to do it. But don't stress over it because that would be counter productive. It's ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is going to prom with someone else!
Q. Hey guys, I am sort of in a dilemma. I am in highschool and I have a girlfriend of about 6 months. We both really like each other, talk everyday, and just generally feel really relaxed and comfortable around each other. But now, as the time for prom ...
A. 2 March 2011: If she can't tell her parents about you, it can be a little difficult to explain (with lies). And chances are your girlfriend will end up going to your prom with this guy. Even if you push your girlfriend to go to your prom with you, what do you ... (read in full...)
Insecure about the size of my penis?
Q. my penis size is 5inches im very unsecure and afraid that It wont penetrate or fit! and my girlfriend wants to have sex veryy soon. should i be worried please help!! and please be honest.. thank you (:...
A. 2 March 2011: Perfectly normal.... (read in full...)
Girlfriend always getting hit on and never invites me to work parties!
Q. My gf and I have been dating for almost 3 years,im 27,shes about to turn 26. About a year ago she started a new job at car dealership,as a receptionist.Now because she is on the 'frontline' of the company,she has to dress nice.Now i dont have a ...
A. 2 March 2011: You should confront her about this. Specially when she told you her co-workers were there with their families. I don't know if she's cheating on you or not. But the only act of leaving you apart from a party where family members were invited is ... (read in full...)
My Girlfriend seems like she is starting to get interested in someone else, what do I do
Q. Ok so I have been dating this girl for about a year and lately this kid keeps posting stuff on her facebook about how awesome she looks doing her sports and how he wants to go watch her all the time and occasionally asks her to go to a party or ...
A. 2 March 2011: You have to trust your girlfriend. If you can't then your relationship makes no sense. So far I don't see any sign of cheating. You have to let her do what she wants. Then, if she cheats you, you move on. What is worth her fidelity if she doesn't ... (read in full...)
Should we keep seeing the therapist?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for three years and recently began having some serious problems in our relationship. We began seeing a couple's therapist two weeks ago. My problem is our therapist. Not only did she tell me that it's my fault ...
A. 2 March 2011: You should change you boyfriend for cheating on you. And your therapist for being so bitchy with you. Of course she's not a serious professional if she told you that.
Sorry for putting thing so straight. But I wouldn't allow someone cheat on me an... (read in full...)
Is she refusing to answer the question because she has been with someone else?
Q. Me and my girlfriend broke up 7 months ago but now we are back together.I havent been with someone else during this period and she knows that, but when i ask her the same she gets mad at me, saying she is not going to tell me anything about it and ...
A. 1 March 2011: Well, let's face it. If she won't answer is because she's been with someone else. But that is not the actual problem here. The question is why do you want to know if you dumped her. When you break up both members of the relationship broken are free ... (read in full...)
She made her choice, but now I'm hurting..
Q. Ok so I met this girl a while ago, we swiftly hit it off and became friends. Knowing this girl was in a relationship, I didn't push for anything more. After a while we became best friends simply spending each evening talking, it had been a while ...
A. 1 March 2011: You have to move on, that's pretty obvious. Staying with her will hurt you, and you will end up hurting her. So there is no real profit from that friendship. If you walk away you will save yourself from a certain pain. She will miss you in the ... (read in full...)
I can't keep up this secret much longer!!!
Q. Going to keep this as short as possible.. I am a girl that's16 years old and am in a relationship with a 20 year old male. As I am living with my parents, and knew they would be against this we've been in a secret relationship for 10 months. ...
A. 1 March 2011: Let's put this straight: your Mom's problem is she thinks you two are going to have sex. And probably, she thinks he's going to abuse his age and try to fool you into it. All this is reasonable because she's your Mom. And she must be afraid you end ... (read in full...)
She's happy I'm heartbroken, is this just a rumour or true?
Q. Recently one of my good friends told me that a girl who is currently in a relationship with someone else is happy that I am heartbroken because of her. She is a very close and good friend of mine. In the past, she helped me out a lot in a lot of ...
A. 1 March 2011: Let's see. She is your friend, you love her, and she's happy you suffer because of her. Well. You have to find out if this is true or not. Because you have to figure out what to do. And you can't go on without this piece of information. ... (read in full...)
Everyone now sees me as the "bad girl" after a regrettable one-night stand. What do I do now??
Q. Okey, this is a story I rather not tell but I really need some help on this one. A week ago I met some boys at a party.. we all became really drunk and later that night we went to one of the boys' houses. A lot happened that night, but to tell the...
A. 1 March 2011: This girl has no right to be mad at you. In the first place, if someone should have protected her, it was his ex-boyfriend. Quite simple.
As for the rest of the people, well. You have to face it, the world where you live is just like this. If... (read in full...)
I'm not scared..but I still stop it, why?
Q. Heey:) I'm 13 and the other day I had a boy round my house, and we were bored so he wanted to play nervous, a game were you touch eachother in certain parts, and he went up my shorts and in my nickers then I stopped him before he could do anything...
A. 28 February 2011: If you don't feel like it, just don't do it. If you feel like it, don't do it neither because you are way too young.
Believe me: if you start too young it will bring you a lot of problems in your future relationships. Save yourself from unneeded... (read in full...)
She used me and I need to confront her on it
Q. I am in serious need of help, The girl I thought was my best friend/friend with benefits/girlfriend used the shit out of me and I can't stand it. She said we never dated but I went to her house met her parents went to sporting events picked her up ...
A. 28 February 2011: What she does is wrong at so many levels that I don't know what to tell you. Yes, you are being used and you have to cut contact with this girl. Failing to do so, will bring you grief and pain only.
What to tell her?
"I thought we where dating ... (read in full...)
1 last thing before we settle, should I let him?
Q. I have been friends with my guy for over 10 years and we hooked up at new year, 2010. We are both in our late 30's and it feels very serious and we are discussing getting married and having kids. Basically he booked a holiday to Thailand before w...
A. 27 February 2011: I don't find it a good idea. You are committed to one another already, and I guess you are exclusive. So letting him do this is letting him cheat on you. On the other hand, if you let him do this you should wait six months when he's back. And t... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is best friends with her ex!
Q. I really really like my gf. But she is best friends with her ex. She tells him everything, and it kills me. In all honesty i understand being friends with an ex, but being best friends. Its more than i can take but i cant be the kind of guy who ...
A. 27 February 2011: If you are not going to tell her stop talking with this guy, you have two options left: you just accept this, or you break up. Does you girlfriend know how much this hurts you? You should talk with her about this. In my own personal opinion, th... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is going to prom with someone else!
Q. Hey guys, I am sort of in a dilemma. I am in highschool and I have a girlfriend of about 6 months. We both really like each other, talk everyday, and just generally feel really relaxed and comfortable around each other. But now, as the time for prom ...
A. 27 February 2011: In the first place you better wait to see what happens when your girlfriend tells her mother about you. I guess the reasonable result should be you going to her prom. And that's all. Let's put something straight here, you are her boyfriend. I find ... (read in full...)
Am I puritan for staying a virgin at 18?
Q. I am an 18 year old girl who is a virgin. All of my friends have had sexual relations prior to turning 18. They say I am a puritan and should be having sex at my age. I think I am right in that I want to wait until I am married. Am I wrong ?...
A. 27 February 2011: The only person who can judge your sexuality is you. Other people can just give you hints or tell you what they think about you. And you have to take their word for that, a hint or an opinion. What I think is that waiting for losing your virg... (read in full...)
His brother is trying to sabotoge our relationship!
Q. I love my boyfriend very much and is very much serious about him. I know that very well that his brother doesn't like our commitment. Recently I came to know the reason behind this hatred, his brother liked me before. But I accepted my boyfriend's ...
A. 27 February 2011: This is a hard one. But I will tell you what: your boyfriend has to believe in you in order to be your boyfriend. There is no relationship if there isn't trust. Simple as that. He just can't doubt your word and pretend everything is ok. He has to ... (read in full...)
She denied cheating on me, and I've gotten over that hurdle, but now I am losing her! Please help!
Q. I am in a long distance relationship with a girl I met about 7 months ago. We only officially started dating about 3 months ago. Things were wonderful in the beginning. We got along so wonderfully, we would talk all night on the phone. We would ...
A. 27 February 2011: In the first place you have to realize this can have two different explanations. A. Maybe these guys just wanted to ruin your relationship and made this whole thing up. And so far their plan seems to be working. Because your girlfriend is ve... (read in full...)
I am so beautiful. Are my friends all just jealous of me?
Q. I am so beautiful. I have a really nice body and i have double D's. Flirting comes naturally to me. I can honestly say that a lot of people like me and just want to be me. I'm really popular and i have a lot of experience. All my close friends are ...
A. 27 February 2011: I can't talk about you nor your friends because I don't really know you.
I'm twice your age so I've been there and I know what happens as time goes on. The girls I knew at 16, that match your description of yourself, are today all average women wi... (read in full...)
Why did my boy friend's breathing change? What did that mean?
Q. i was at my boyfriends house yesterday and me got into a pretty heavy make out session. i started kissing his neck and his breathing went all funny. he kinda took a massive breath in and then was breathing quickly and deeply. what does this mean? ...
A. 27 February 2011: Maybe he was about to have an orgasm and he had to breath deeply in order to stop it, for obvious reasons. As Abella said, kissing for a long period of time can lead some people to orgasm. Specially when you're young.... (read in full...)
Is age just a number?? I like him but he is younger than me!!
Q. Is it wierd to fall for a guy that iss 3 years younger then you, cuz i think i have but we really dont care about age , but what i am asking is is it wierd to fall for a guy 3 years younger?...
A. 27 February 2011: Well. Three year difference when you are 25 is not the same as when you are 16. At 25 nobody can tell the difference. But we all change too much between 13 and 16. And I'm not talking about what other can see or think, but what you two feel as the ... (read in full...)
I want to make sure that I'm not missing out on something!
Q. I have been with my girlfriend for nearly 12 months. I love her more than anything, and I can't imagine being happier with anyone else. But, she's my first partner and my first love, and I feel like I need to see other people. But I don't want...
A. 26 February 2011: I will tell you something: after dating thirty people you won't be sure if you are with the right person. Because you can never be completely sure about it. If you love her, I promise you that you will regret taking a break just because you didn't ... (read in full...)
I found out my girlfriend has a very wild sexual past, and she did webcam shows for others. Will a threesome make me feel better about her past?
Q. Ok where to begin?! I was in a relationship of 8 years and that ended 1 year ago. For the past 5 months, I've been dating and living with a woman who 24 years old. She has 2 children and I love her and them! The problem is she did soooo many sex...
A. 26 February 2011: I threesome with her won't make you feel better. In fact, it would be a lot worse.
I totally agree with Frank B Kermit. You have different values when it comes to sex and that's too hard to change. You are a grown up so a threesome won't change y... (read in full...)
I think of my b/f as a friend, not lover
Q. i see my boyfriend more as a brother or best friend more than a boyfriend i love him need advice?...
A. 26 February 2011: It's a common thing with long term relationships that started when you were too young. If you started dating, let's say three years ago, this is only normal. And of course, you have to break up and find other people.... (read in full...)
Three significant relationships have all ended due to circumstance. Is it my fault?
Q. Is it true that women just want bad guys? I'm a good natured guy, and whenever I'm in a relationship with someone I will do anything to try and keep them happy and show them I care. Unfortunately I've just gone through my 3rd break up from a signif...
A. 26 February 2011: I don't reckon you are doing something wrong. I think that these girls weren't that into you as you were into them. You can't get stuck with people who don't appreciate you. The best thing you can do is move on. Girls do like bad guys, especially... (read in full...)
Are there women out there that will still find me attractive, despite the size of my manhood??
Q. I am 41 years old and separated from my wife for a few years. I think I am quite good looking and I have had sex with a couple of women since our separation, but I am concerned that my penis is very small as the last women said she was shocked ...
A. 25 February 2011: I'm a guy but I can tell you this:
"Are there women out there that would find me attractive with such a small penis?"
Of course, there is a lot of women who prefer small penises and there is a lot of women who simply don't care about it.... (read in full...)
Me and my boyfriend don't know what to do about the rumors surrounding our relationship!
Q. My BF is hearing rumors from ppl about me and him and I'm getting sick and tired of it, and so is he. My BF and I were actually thinking about breaking up the other day because of it all. There just is to much drama. We decided to stay together...
A. 25 February 2011: What kind of relationship do you have if you are going to break up because some stupid person is spreading rumours about you? From what you wrote I understand these are rumours and nothing else. I mean none of you have a doubt about this subject. ... (read in full...)
Past relationship is affecting my new one...how do I forget it?
Q. I was with my ex boyfriend for a year and 3 months, i tried to convince myself it was a good relationship, but if im honest, i was treated awful, and cheated on, when we split up, everything was fine, and i felt free, and a long term friend (boy) ...
A. 25 February 2011: Not every person on earth is a cheater. And you have to tell this yourself. Your new boyfriend is not to be punished for the things your ex did. And you deserve to be happy with your boyfriend. Which seems to be what you want now. When your mind ... (read in full...)
Smoking, drinking, sex, parties, the wrong crowd, failing in my class ...My life is a nightmare. HELP!!
Q. My Life is on the border of disaster.! I'm a 15yr old sophomore and i need serious help. since my mom had her 2nd child, I've been getting away with a lot of stuff lately, sneaking out to go have sex, drinking at parties and smoking with guy...
A. 25 February 2011: Your question makes sense, and your life is about the disaster, in fact. My question is whether you are willing to do the only thing that can save you. Which happens to be talking with your parents and asking them for help. Doing this or failing to ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and his best friend (a girl) have a ritual where they spend Sunday night together and drink past midnight!!
Q. Dear Cupid, My boyfriend and I have been dating for 15months. His best friend is a woman he's known for 15. When they met, she was a lesbian in a long term relationship. They spent their Sunday nights together and started a ritual of making...
A. 25 February 2011: If what bugs you is he could cheat on you. I think, chances are that she is the last person your boyfriend will cheat on you with.
Let alone the cheating, this is a problem for your relationship, specially if you want to live together. As you alre... (read in full...)
Question about underage relationship laws.
Q. Hello everyone, What are the (United States') laws about underage, illegal relationships? Just a brief overview would be appreciated. Thank you!...
A. 24 February 2011: The only thing I know is legal age for having sex varies between 16 and 18 according to the state you are. From this I guess you can have a relationship as long as you don't have sex. I don't reckon there is a limit for having just a relation... (read in full...)
Can we fix this? I don't appreciate her lying right to my face
Q. me and my girlfriend ahve been seeing eachother for a little over 6 months now and i recentley caught her in a lie the other night, there has been a huge fight and dsipute with me and a few of her friends regarding one of her friends, she had been ...
A. 24 February 2011: English isn't my first language. Maybe I'm not the person to tell you this, but. I'm sorry, your text is impossible to understand. It lacks of sentences and you talk about a lot of people and call them all "friend" so there is no way to know who... (read in full...)
Is it bad to be scared about 1st time sex?
Q. Ohkkay im 16 and my boyfriend wants meh too have sex. I have to say i wanna too buhh he will be my first and im really scared too? Is that bad?...
A. 24 February 2011: Worrying is completely normal and healthy. Before you get into it talk to a doctor or an adult you trust to get advice on how to take care of you and your boyfriend. Just in case: yes he MUST wear a condom even if he's virgin. Under no circumstances ... (read in full...)
I lost my confidence after my first relationship!
Q. My ex-girlfriend used to abuse me and scold me so much that I have lost my confidence completely . Whenever I try talking to girl , my body starts crumbling and I can’t figure out what to say and what not to. I am so low on confidence that I f...
A. 24 February 2011: You know the fact that your ex girlfriend mistreated doesn't mean she was right or she had the right to do that. No one is wrong all the time, so you shouldn't have any problem understanding that what she did was wrong. If you can't control yo... (read in full...)
Could it really happen that I might not know about a baby resulting from a one-night stand?
Q. Over a year and I half ago I had my only one night stand of my life. There was alot to drink, sex with and without a condom, although I never "finished" inside her. I woke up the next morning and felt sick to my stomach with disgust. This was ...
A. 24 February 2011: Of course it's possible. She could even have no idea who the father of the baby was. Supposing there was a baby. Or she could have chosen not to mention it at all. She may have cheated on a serious boyfriend and make him believe the child was his.
... (read in full...)
She was very promiscous in the past but with me she is boring in the bedroom! What is going on here?
Q. An interesting quote I found: "You do not need to know too much about her past. Behind the colorful fabrics, that closet has skeletons" I think i need to get this off my chest, I unfortunately don't really have anyone to discuss this with right ...
A. 23 February 2011: Of course I can't explain women thoughts. But I can tell you something that is very common for girls to think. They think there are guy to screw with (I mean having wild sex) and other guys to marry. That way of splitting the guys universe could ... (read in full...)
I give her $5000.00 2 days later she splits! How do I get my money back?
Q. I thought I knew her for 5 years! We were together for that amount of time. She (aged 50) asked me for 5 thousand dollars. I gave it to her. 2 days later she split. Does the timing of the two events sound that she had every intention to 'screw' ...
A. 23 February 2011: I think it was her plan to do that. And, I don't know laws in your country, but unless you have some paper signed by her or witness of the loan, you will have a hard time trying to get the money back legally.... (read in full...)
How do I deal with her, I love her but she does not want to get serious??
Q. I don't know when to say "I love you" to her...but there is more to it... To fully understand I need you to give the full story. last month I began dating one of my old best friend whom I have very deep history with. I've known her since the 7th ...
A. 23 February 2011: I'm so sorry but I don't see a good future for your relationship. I hope I'm wrong. But she is dating you just after a huge break up, which isn't a good idea. And this is not the first time you tell her you love her. She already knew, in fact she ... (read in full...)
If he makes a move on me, how do I stay faithful to my boyfriend?
Q. a year ago, me and this boy i liked kissed, but we didnt go out, and stopped talking after a while. now i have a really lovely boyfriend, but this boy has come back into my life again. he's got a reputation as a bit of a tool, and he's really ...
A. 23 February 2011: "we go to the same parties and get a little drunk"
If you think such situation will make you less of a cheater, you are very wrong. Being with a person you are attracted to and drunk is no excuse for cheating. Anyway, if you think you are that... (read in full...)
Do I just tell him I want to wait for my birthday to have sex??
Q. Hey guys, me and my boyfriend have been together for over a year now. I am 15 almost 16 and he is already 16, he suggested us having sex, I was quite weary as to do it or not, this is because i weigh quite a lot and have very large breasts that ...
A. 22 February 2011: In the first place you have to wait to be the legal age (according to your country) to have sex.
For the confidence issue I would recommend you to start doing some sport or working out. So you get your body more like you think it should be. I me... (read in full...)
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