Why is my partner even considering her ex? Why did her ex show up now after four years of being away?
Q. I need help any body please. my problem is im with a great person who has helped me get through alot and i helped her through alot in the last 7 months. we have been dating since march and out of the blue her ex husband calls her asking for f...
A. 21 August 2012: If people at work ask you you don't really OWE them an answer, just tell them you don't know.
However I do think you needs to talk to your GF and she NEEDS to figure out what she wants to do and stick to that, not dangle a carrot in front of you. ... (read in full...)
Sex every other day for 2 months, but I'm not pregnant yet!
Q. Hi! I'm almost 32, my hubby is almost 34. We've been trying to have a baby for 2 months now, having sex every other day. We're both healthy and in good shape, don't smoke and don't drink alcohol. Unfortunately, after two months, I'm not pregnant and ...
A. 14 August 2012: Folic acid and a daily multivitamin might also be a good idea :)
I really wouldn't start on prenatal vitamins til you actually ARE pregnant, but you can.... (read in full...)
Confusion whether it's an invite for a second date or not?
Q. Hello i went on a date with a woman, she sent e,mail, i think date went ok . she sent, e,mail next day said , lovley day , lovley gent. next day i sent an e,mail saying i wanted to give her a kiss on the date , but i did not want too risk it on ...
A. 14 August 2012: Maybe you can cultivate a friendship with this woman and learn how to be around other women too?
I don't think that WE (women) in general expect a certain behavior from guys, it all depended on the guy and the situation. Don't play a part, be... (read in full...)
I'm feeling uncomfortable with my boyfriend's reaction to what I wear.
Q. Hi guys So I'm feeling uncomfortable with my boyfriend's reaction to what I wear. I am a doctor and at work I wear scrubs. He came to see me at work the other day and then said he could see my bra (the strap was showing so I pulled my top back ...
A. 14 August 2012: He needs to chill.. It's freaking scrubs lol
Sounds like he would be perfectly happy if you wore a hijab and was covered from head to toe.
I will quote you:
He says I'm just telling you the truth, because I know what guys are like. It's not ... (read in full...)
There's this guy. And he's cheating on his girlfriend.. with me!
Q. There's this guy. And he's cheating on his girlfriend.. with me. I'm the other girl. I honestly love him and think he's the one. However, he told me he's thinking of breaking up with his girlfriend to be with me, but he hasn't yet. and...
A. 14 August 2012: Back off. Dump him.
If he really loves you like he claims, he will do the right thing.
And honey, it's only been a month.
However, I have to question your taste. Dating a man with that kind of morals, do you think he will be faithful to you?... (read in full...)
Why can't I have a spine to leave him? Please help me!
Q. Hi Why do women even the one who are financially way independent keep on stay in an abusive relationship. My bf for one always and keeps on abuses me emotionally, never show his affection, always makes me wonder whether im imagining thin...
A. 14 August 2012: Why do you even TALK to him about leaving? Why not pack your bags and get the heck out of Dodge?
Best thing you can do is separate yourself. Get your ducks in a row.
IF you are on the lease remove your name, if you are on any of the bills rem... (read in full...)
Co-worker confessed to feelings for me that I don't share at all
Q. I'm 21 and my coworker is 18. I see him as a younger friend and coworker and we get along well (well as in normally). He has been texting randomly recently and I'll respond (not always respond though) naturally without leading him onto anything. The ...
A. 14 August 2012: Tell him that you will take it as a compliment, but that you are not interested in him in "that" way.
Be honest. And don't feel BAD about it. Replying to a guys texts doesn't mean you are/were leading him on or putting ideas in his head.
... (read in full...)
Married for less than 1 year and Super UnHappy!!!!!
Q. Hi guys. Thanks for reading my post. So...I've been married for 11 and a half months..Sept 4th is our 1 year anniversary. We were high school sweethearts then went our separate ways during college..but we stayed friends. We both moved away from ...
A. 14 August 2012: You two really should have done some pre-marital counseling. Specially when you knew you wasn't ready.
I don't think there is any shame in not being ready to be married, but you ARE married and now you need to figure out what to do next.
... (read in full...)
Does her sexual past matter? Would I prefer this new friend over my GF just because of my Gf's sexual past?
Q. I have never been the jealous type and I am not sure I would define what I feel as jealousy. My new girlfriend sexual past is really affecting me. I have had quite a few girlfriends in my life and never felt anything like this before. Not even c...
A. 14 August 2012: I think you GF had ONS had less to do with actual sex, and more to do with how she saw herself. Low self esteem and low self worth. I'm guessing that she didn't think she was GF-material and therefore had repeatable ONS with the same guy because she ... (read in full...)
After many difficulties we broke up. Would I be right in suspecting he had this girl waiting in the wings all along?
Q. hi readers. so my boyfriend of three years and i have split up again. we went through this circle of breaking up and getting back. he was a bit too possessive over my internet life and would not stop spying on me blah blah blah. now he has met s...
A. 14 August 2012: Does it really matter? You two were obviously not that compatible, but seemed to stay together because it was convenient/habit perhaps? (better the devil you know?)
If he has already met someone new, let it go, let him go. Obsession about him will... (read in full...)
Unsure of my colleague's intentions
Q. I am in a weird situation. My co-worker gives me all kinds of indicators of interest and for the longest time I didn't want to return any, because I nearly got fired from my last job because my supervisor wanted me. My current co-worker, started ...
A. 14 August 2012: Honestly I would keep "romance" out of the work place. A chit-chat is fine a little flirting CAN be OK, as long as you don't overdo it.
The fact that she seems to blow hot & cold would make me pause and not take it any further.
... (read in full...)
Is it fair to ask my boyfriend to pay the bills if he moves in and pay no rent?
Q. Would it be fair to ask for my boyfriend to pay all bills (electricity, gas and water) if he moved in with me? I have a house but have a mortgage. He is wanting us to live together but only gives me options of selling or renting mine out and get...
A. 14 August 2012: I can't see why you should sell your house, but if he DOES move in he should help out with the bills, that would only be fair. And honestly, if he rather stay with his mom at the age of 31 then drive an extra 15 min a day for work, I would STRONGLY ... (read in full...)
Can't deal with her past - should I leave now or keep trying to deal with my issue?
Q. I used to roll my eyes when people say they had issues dealing with their partner's past; however, now I am unexpectedly on the receiving end as my partner's past is a bit beyond what I am used to, and I am at my wits end trying to stop dwelling on ...
A. 14 August 2012: Sounds to me like you need a therapist. You need to deal with this, this is YOUR problem, it's not really about her.
Read Yos post over and over til you "get it".
Or do HER a favor and let her go. Living with someone who is THIS judgmental ... (read in full...)
One thing sober, another drunk! What gives?
Q. Whilst seeing someone new my best friend made it clear he wanted to get with me. Let's call my friend P. P's best friend told me he was in tears when he found out I was with someone new. I stopped dating this guy in hopes of getting with my frien...
A. 14 August 2012: P sounds like a big baby.. Not someone mature enough to actually DATE someone.
It's not uncommon for some people to be "braver" whilst drunk.... (read in full...)
Sex every other day for 2 months, but I'm not pregnant yet!
Q. Hi! I'm almost 32, my hubby is almost 34. We've been trying to have a baby for 2 months now, having sex every other day. We're both healthy and in good shape, don't smoke and don't drink alcohol. Unfortunately, after two months, I'm not pregnant and ...
A. 14 August 2012: 2 months is nothing :) However you might want to google ovulation charts and start looking into your "fertile times".
Took my husband and I, 18 months. and then 3 days for #2 lol... (read in full...)
Should I tell her i'll still be her friend or should I tell her I want nothing to do with her?
Q. Very serious question. When I was dumped, I had a difficult time on focusing on my school work. Not only that, but, I was so hurt, I : nearly flunked a VERY important test (I didn't finish it. But, I had a second chance, and passed the test....
A. 14 August 2012: I agree that I think a clean break from her is the best. However, I think you need to own your own actions. She didn't make you fail.
Pretending to be friends with someone you still have strong feeling for isn't healthy.... (read in full...)
Preferably guys' opinions- Friendship between guys and girls, What do you think?
Q. I know a lot of experts on dearcupid.org think men normally don't befriend girls unless they want something more from the girls - either sex or romance. So what do you guys think about this?Do you agree that a lot of the time, guys and girls b...
A. 14 August 2012: Growing up I had mainly male friends, as the street I lived on only had one girl and she was 10 years my senior and my older brother and I were two peas in a pod.
Throughout school and college I had many male friend all of them platonic. For inst... (read in full...)
Confusion whether it's an invite for a second date or not?
Q. Hello i went on a date with a woman, she sent e,mail, i think date went ok . she sent, e,mail next day said , lovley day , lovley gent. next day i sent an e,mail saying i wanted to give her a kiss on the date , but i did not want too risk it on ...
A. 14 August 2012: I think if she specifically wanted to meet you she would tell you that she ride her bikes bu so-so spot on the canal around XXpm.
Her explanation was rather vague, which usually is a nice way or polite way of NOT committing. I highly doubt sh... (read in full...)
My boyfriend forgot about his plans with me and hung out with his friend instead
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for nearly three years and he is my first love. The other day he said I could see him after my work so on my break that day I phoned him to see if he was still okay with it. Turns out he didn't remember about it and w...
A. 13 August 2012: I agree with Caring Guy's question.
IF he does this often, I would say enough is enough, that obviously you are NOT his top priority.
If this is a one-off event, I'd let it slide. And since you have already explained that you were a bit disap... (read in full...)
Boyfriend fondles himself constantly
Q. My boyfriend has this habit of fondling his penis all the time. Even in non-sexual situations like when he's reading a book or just having a drink, he has his hand on his penis, fondling it or playing with it. It embarrasses me since he does it ...
A. 13 August 2012: It's one of hose habits that some boys develop when they are young and some... never stop.
Is he even aware of doing it most of the time?... (read in full...)
I have just learned my husband fathered another child during our marriage
Q. Hi I hope someone can give me some advice! I have been married for 31 years and have a pleasant life! We have raised 3 well adjusted,talented and successful kids. My husband was my first lover and even thou he had a child out of wedlock, which he...
A. 13 August 2012: I don't think it sounds stupid to be hurt and disappointing that he cheated on you, even if it happened a long time ago.. YOU just found out!
And how tacky to contact your daughter. Sorry that girl/woman should have contacted YOUR husband.... (read in full...)
Confusion whether it's an invite for a second date or not?
Q. Hello i went on a date with a woman, she sent e,mail, i think date went ok . she sent, e,mail next day said , lovley day , lovley gent. next day i sent an e,mail saying i wanted to give her a kiss on the date , but i did not want too risk it on ...
A. 13 August 2012: No, I'm sorry she told you straight up that she isn't interested.
IF you want a romantic relationship.. move on.... (read in full...)
Is he jealous or doesn't want me to succeed?
Q. Could it be possible that he is jealous of me or is it because he doesn't want me to succeed? I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for the last 3 years, in all this time I have not accomplished anything. Do not have my license or colle...
A. 13 August 2012: Don't worry about him. Be your own BEST cheer leader. And if he keeps that attitude up PROVE him wrong, show him that you can do ANYTHING.
Maybe he's afraid that you will change? See "greener grass"? Or is it because he's seen you start stuff be... (read in full...)
Are guys immediate about pursuing a girl or do they go away to think it through before they make their first move?
Q. I am a very conscientious person and as a result I tend to over analyse and think my way out of things. when it comes to getting to know a guy I tend to hold back at first and observe his behaviour and actions rather than (like many women) pounce a...
A. 13 August 2012: No, I wouldn't try and "convince" someone that they should WANT me.
You know the saying, you can drag a horse to water, but you can't make it drink? Same goes for relationship.
I don't think there is anything wrong in having a type, but it's a... (read in full...)
The Ex looms large in our relationship. What can do to keep him in my life without pressuring him?
Q. I met this guy and he is amazing. We have gone on three dates and quite frankly I feel very comfortable with him. But we have one MAJOR problem. His ex gf. They dated for 5 years and broke up a month ago(he broke up with her but she's not ov...
A. 13 August 2012: I think what you want is not really "friendship". What you want is to be around him in case he realizes that there is a decent girl RIGHT THERE waiting for him. That is not friendship. So you have to be honest. With yourself and with him.
IF yo... (read in full...)
Are guys immediate about pursuing a girl or do they go away to think it through before they make their first move?
Q. I am a very conscientious person and as a result I tend to over analyse and think my way out of things. when it comes to getting to know a guy I tend to hold back at first and observe his behaviour and actions rather than (like many women) pounce a...
A. 13 August 2012: I don't think anyone knows instantly if they want to be with someone or not. Lust can be rather instantaneous, but that is just lust.
I think if your current approach isn't working for you, you might want to try and change it up. Letting a guy kn... (read in full...)
What can we both do to help encourage my libido to return? I feel like a horrible Gf to my Bf
Q. I have been going out with my boyfriend for 4 years now and I have completely lost interest in sex. We've tried different things to get my interest back but it hasn't worked and I feel like a horrible girlfriend. I still love my boyfriend it's not ...
A. 13 August 2012: Have you been to see your doctor? It can actually be hormonal imbalance.
Was the sex good before you "lost" your libido? Were you satisfied? A few studies show that women can actually lose their libido totally if they are "getting" poor sex.
... (read in full...)
Never needed it before. What would be the reasons why, after all this time, I have now started to need lube to have sex?
Q. Dear cupid, I'm a 33 year old woman with a healthy sexual appetite and a boyfriend that I've been dating for a year. With my previous sexual partners I never had to use lube, I was always wet enough to have sex although I've never been so wet that...
A. 13 August 2012: Yes, you can get "dryer" as you age.
Also, like So_Very_Confused pointed out certain medications can make you produce less natural "lubrication".
Make sure you drink plenty of water, that can actually help as well.... (read in full...)
I have been nothing but nice to her. What are the chances that she will start to like me sometime soon?
Q. There is this girl that I like who doesn't like me the same way back. (Classic, I know right?) I've been nothing but nice to her, and I try to smile and say hi when I see her. How much of a chance do I have of her feelings changing over the cour...
A. 13 August 2012: I don't think she will change her mind. She might like you, but not like you, like you.
Just because you like her and you are nice to her, doesn't mean she will magically think you are her knight in shining armor and the love of her life.
... (read in full...)
Why is my partner even considering her ex? Why did her ex show up now after four years of being away?
Q. I need help any body please. my problem is im with a great person who has helped me get through alot and i helped her through alot in the last 7 months. we have been dating since march and out of the blue her ex husband calls her asking for f...
A. 13 August 2012: He might have realized exactly WHAT he lost when their relationship ended, specially if he's tried to be in a few relationships over the past 4 years.
The thing is, he doesn't seem to realize that they BOTH (hopefully) have grown since they dat... (read in full...)
Recently broke up with Bf. Who says he still loves me. Now his friend is interested in me. Is it too soon to go with the other guy?
Q. I recently broke up with my boyfriend, but he says he's still in love with me. And one of his close friends, let's call him X , recently was left by his girlfriend, but still has some feelings for her. So this brings me to my problem: I've be...
A. 13 August 2012: Don't get into something with his FRIEND. That's just sleazy of the friend AND you.
The guy X is not over his GF, he just wants a rebound, you are not over YOUR ex and you just want someone to love.
Take the time to get over ONE relationship... (read in full...)
I'm five months pregnant but he made me walk 8 miles plus home. I love him but he stresses me. Should I give him up?
Q. Hello everyone. I am 17 years old and I'm pregnant. I am 5 months pregnant and the boy who got me pregnant was my boyfriend of a year. He has now decided to choose alcohol and drugs over me and my little girl. I'm not really sure as to what I s...
A. 13 August 2012: Other then the fact that you dated hi ma year and that he is the father of your unborn child NOTHING you write here speaks well of him, and nothing you you do will magically make him a decent guy.
Let him go. Focus on YOU and the baby.... (read in full...)
Why would he do this? Do I try to get him back? My Bf broke up with me as he failed a grade.
Q. So I've been dating this guy for a few months and we really love each other. The only problem is that he failed a grade and I get to go to the next grade. This is out conversation Him- "I think we need to break up. Well honestly, I failed math an...
A. 13 August 2012: You can't MAKE him be in a relationship where he thinks he doesn't belong.
Give him some space and maybe he will get his head out of his bum and realize that you two can make it work, or he won't.
Either way, Set him free.... (read in full...)
The Ex looms large in our relationship. What can do to keep him in my life without pressuring him?
Q. I met this guy and he is amazing. We have gone on three dates and quite frankly I feel very comfortable with him. But we have one MAJOR problem. His ex gf. They dated for 5 years and broke up a month ago(he broke up with her but she's not ov...
A. 13 August 2012: Honestly, as nice as this guy seems he is FAR from ready to date.
I would end whatever it is you have and move on. No one (IMHO) gets over another person in a months, not after 5 years together. The fact that he was worried enough to call her... (read in full...)
He was like my dream guy. But I feel wounded by his actions. How should I handle this situation?
Q. I met this guy at a club. I liked him at first sight .I thought he liked me,too. he thought I am good looking and show me off in front of his friends. He was like my dream guy. I am afraid I can never meet someone just like him again. He...
A. 13 August 2012: He might have come off as a Dream guy but he really was quite the sleazy toad, you see?
This is why you take your time getting to know a guy.
I would honestly ignore him and move on. If he does contact you I would tell him to go fly a kite, a... (read in full...)
He has depression but is that any way to treat me? He's horrible and calls me nasty names.
Q. My partner is and has suffered from depression for years (way before i met him but i didnt know about it for a while after we met.) his temper lately has been awful and he swears at me and calls me horrible names. he has even told me he doesnt want ...
A. 13 August 2012: Wow, the guy needs help and more then you can provide. BUT just because he is depressed and not happy with himself doesn't mean you HAVE to stay and be his verbal punching bag.
I'm sorry, I would actually put forth an ultimatum, either he gets hel... (read in full...)
We broke up last week. Now he's talking FWB. What does he really want?
Q. Heyy please help me out. I am confused and don't know what to do. A month ago me and my bf broke up. Didnot contact each other for like two weeks. And then became friends. Then we start seeing each other and he starts kissing me. I think we are back...
A. 13 August 2012: He wants sex, but not a relationships with you.
Basically, he wants a familiar place to park his dick without having to put an effort into a relationship... all while he looks for someone ELSE to date.
If you continue to sleep with him he will... (read in full...)
Going out on 1st date for a drink. What should I talk about?
Q. As you all know, my last girfriend was Hungarian, but tomorrow night I am going on a date with an English girl. She likes my sense of humour (by text), likes my picture. Its been a while since I've dated (in English!) We are going for a drink, wha...
A. 13 August 2012: Update - she says she needs the money, and wants to rearrange
Are you paying for the "date" ? ... (read in full...)
Ladies why date a man first if he asks you to marry him right away?
Q. This question is especially for young single women. If a young single man who has everything going for him financially and career wise decides to settle down and approaches you but doesn't want to date you but asks you to marry him. Would you ...
A. 13 August 2012: I'm not single, but I'd bite anyways.
No, for all I know he is "only" good on paper.
Arranged marriages work, but not as much as they "used" to, because now women want more then just a "husband". They want LOVE too.
Just because you can ... (read in full...)
How does an atheist overcome inter-faith dating challenges?
Q. Hi, I was wondering what your opinion is on inter-faith dating, specifically for atheists. How do I meet girls who are atheist or agnostic? Do you think girls care whether I’m atheist? My issue is that I really prefer to date girls who are li...
A. 13 August 2012: Think an atheist could win the U.S. Presidency? Short answer... No way.
As a non Christian I know how you feel. While I have respect for anyone's choice in faith/religion, I believe it's personal choice and if someone choose NOT to particip... (read in full...)
Was I in the wrong here and if so how do I make amends?
Q. Hey, I need help with someone very important to me. I was texting my guy friend and he spelt a few things completely wrong, so naturally, I told him to learn how to spell (I was only joking )... But this is where things get messed up. He responded- ...
A. 13 August 2012: Is he dyslexic? or lazy?
If he is dyslexic I can see him being defensive... though either way, I think HE was in the wrong for getting his boxers in a knot and I wouldn't talk to that moron til HE apologized, unless calling you a bitch & hoe is n... (read in full...)
Why am I not over my ex while he is clearly over me?
Q. I'm still not over my ex! my ex and i was together 16 months he found me on myspace we started out as just friends talking and hanging we started talking september 19th and started dating october 7th. he didn't ask me out and i didn't ask him o...
A. 13 August 2012: Not everyone moves at the same speed. Maybe it is taken you longer because you have regrets because of how you acted? Where as.. it was easier for him.. because of how you acted.
However, I don't think ANYONE can get over a person in a month, n... (read in full...)
Can a woman be impregnated by precum?
Q. hello just wanted to get a few opinions on my situation...I slept with both my bf of 3 years and some other guy around the time i got pregnant. just to be clear i hooked up with the other when i was single and we didnt use a condom he also said he ...
A. 13 August 2012: It is possible to become pregnant from a man's pre-ejaculate fluid (pre-cum) under certain circumstances, though the chances are quite low.
Pre-cum itself does not contain sperm, however sperm left behind from a previous ejaculation might be an ea... (read in full...)
Was I right to confront him about his lying?
Q. hi everyone, for a few months now i have been sure my partner has lied to me about a few things. i tried to let it go at first but the feeling and the way he has acted persisted. so after finding some evidence i confronted him. i only asked a ...
A. 13 August 2012: I think it's always a good idea to confront someone who you KNOW is lying to you. If you keep it in and pretend all is good you end with with two things.. it festers and the other person will assume lying is OK with you.
And why does he need to ... (read in full...)
Going out on 1st date for a drink. What should I talk about?
Q. As you all know, my last girfriend was Hungarian, but tomorrow night I am going on a date with an English girl. She likes my sense of humour (by text), likes my picture. Its been a while since I've dated (in English!) We are going for a drink, wha...
A. 2 August 2012: Movies, travels, food, music, books...... I would avoid talking about exes, but find some thing the two of you have in common. Ask her question and pay attention.
Use your manners and don't get drunk :)
And have a great time.... (read in full...)
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