He's telling them our relationship has ended before he even told me. How do I let go and move on from him?
Q. My partner and I have been together 6 and a half years, since I was 16. We both live with my parents and over the course of our relationship we have done for 3-4 years. Roughly 2 years ago, my partner dumped me, for me it was completely out o...
A. 16 August 2016: Good for you!
Finding your "inner" strength to do hard things (like asking him to leave) helps you grow.
While you might feel a little euphoric, you might feel the loss of having him around in a few weeks/months - just remember how you FEEL now... (read in full...)
Sure ''anything'' could happen. But is he being genuine ? Are his words genuine? Or is he giving me false hope?
Q. My ex and I broke up a few months ago when he told me he didnt know if he loved me anymore. Things are amicable so we're remaining friends. However, whenever i bring up my feelings for him and the relationship, he tells me "anything can ha...
A. 16 August 2016: I agree with both aunties,
He is stringing you along in case nothing "better" comes around or IF he gets lonely.
BUT he IS over you as a romantic interest. YOU need to accept that and then modify the contact you have with him now.
OK, so y... (read in full...)
Should I confess my feelings to him? I'm trying to avoid ''what if?'' regrets.
Q. Hi all Should I confess my feelings to this friend of mine ? I don't know if he knows it or not but I have strong feelings for a friend. We used to flirt and hooked up once but I don't think he feels the same way. Even if he does, he won't eve...
A. 16 August 2016: First, let's be logical.
1. Do you REALLY think he would make a good partner? For you?
2. Do you REALLY want a LDR?
3. Do you REALLY think he wouldn't have at least TRIED to spend more time with you IN PERSON if he was interested?
4. Do... (read in full...)
How can I combat these rumours?
Q. Recently a male friend of mine became my worst enemy when I turned down his proposal. Now he is spreading false rumours of the kind that I was in love with him. What shall I do?...
A. 15 August 2016: I agree with Auntie BimBim
EVERY time someone brings up this rumor LAUGH it off - like it's the most ridiculous thing ever! By getting upset or worked up you more often confirm that rumor than deny it.
Who cares what this guy thinks? It's not... (read in full...)
He's breaking my trust and I don't know what to do
Q. My boyfriend and I dated for 4 years now. I knew when I first got with him that his ex girlfriend that cheated on him with her current boyfriend is still contacting him. We moved in together after 1 year and I watched this girl sending messages...
A. 15 August 2016: Maybe those closure e-mails weren't FOR the ex-gf, but for himself. HE needed to make it final. Yes, it's a BIT late for that, but that is the thing with people and "closure" - most don't seem to grasp that the ONLY closure we need is the one WE ... (read in full...)
Why do people cheat? It seems to lead to so much hurt
Q. Why do people cheat? I am a single Mother and I think I will stay single as why would I open myself up to be hurt? I only need to read posts on here to see it goes on every where, affairs, cheating hurting their partners. Why? Stay with someone and ...
A. 14 August 2016: Not everyone cheats.
I have never cheated and out of the 4 partners I have had in my life so far only 1 cheated. So no bad odds IMHO.
You can't go around living life being scared of getting hurt or making the presumption that ALL men will ch... (read in full...)
How best to help stubborn mother out of debt?
Q. My mom asked me to help her manage her finances. I agreed and gathered up her bills and created a budget. She's around 8,000 in debt from online store credit, credit card, and doctor bills. After creating the budget and realizing she doesn't make ...
A. 14 August 2016: I would simply back out.
I would stop giving her financial advice because it's pointless, she isn't listening or caring. She thinks you are somehow wanting to "punish" her because you are giving her GROWN UP advise..
Secondly? I wouldn't give ... (read in full...)
Do I go for mr A or mr B ??
Q. im in a bit of a pickle . Ok theres 2 guys one can be A and the other B . A is an old distant friend weve both liked each other for years but didnt think the other felt the same , were finally going on a date tonight hes perfect apart from he do...
A. 14 August 2016: I would go with neither.
About A
If someone has been a friend for a long time and nothing has happened before... it most likely won't work out now. Also, IF you want more kids HE is a total deal-breaker because he WILL not change his mind. Nor sh... (read in full...)
Why does my boyfriend always want to cum on my face?
Q. When me and my boyfriend have anal sex, he always wants to cum on my face after. I don't mind once in a while but not every time. I have blown him many times and swallowed many times. Can anyone tell me why he wants this all the time ? ...
A. 14 August 2016: Too much porn? It's HUGE in porn for a man to "finish" off that way because it is VISUALLY a pungent statement.
Why not ask him? I DO think it has a LOT to do with porn and the perception of what some people think sex "should" look like.
UNL... (read in full...)
I have lied to my parents for two years and it's really getting to me. At the crossroads. So what should I?
Q. I really need some help right now, so hopefully someone can turn me in the right direction. First I should start out by saying that I just turned 20 but since I live with my parents I have to follow their rules. Okay, so I have always been a go...
A. 14 August 2016: I can see why your parents told you to not talk to men online. They wanted to protect you and keep you safe, unfortunately... it backfired as you didn't listen to them and did it anyways.
And THAT makes you even more vulnerable to people who don'... (read in full...)
What do you think of the things that my ex said to me? I still find my ex attractive
Q. This is about my ex and his brother. I dated my ex for about four months last year. It didn't go well because we were both unwell at the time. I had only just come out of hospital when I met him. I was in there about my mental health problems...
A. 14 August 2016: I think YOU need to move forward, not backwards. You and the ex didn't work back then for whatever reasons, maybe it was too much to handle at the time.
BUT I would NOT go hang out with a guy for his B-day with family and friends when he has a GF... (read in full...)
My long-term friend gets jealous when I mention activities with other friends. Why would she do this?
Q. A long term friend of mine , known her 30 yrs.. (see her every 4 wks) has only 1 other friend gets ? Jealous Changes the subject Talks over me When I mention, casually as part of normal catch up conversation what I did with other friends in...
A. 13 August 2016: If this is the norm... why not talk about other things with her?
She sounds like a bit of a selfish person. Maybe she is a little jealous that you GO do thing? If so... not really your problem.
If she talks over you (aka interrupt) make ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend makes me feel terrible about choosing something or someone else over spending time with him
Q. My boyfriend and I always plan to hang out on certain days of the week. But sometimes, other things come up that I would like to go to. It comes to the point where I miss out on events and outings because I know he'll have a fit if I'm not there ...
A. 13 August 2016: IT IS OK for you to do things with OTHER people than him. And I'd tell him that sulking about it isn't going to work any more.
What he is doing is using emotional blackmail to manipulate you into making HIM the person to always revolve around. ... (read in full...)
After many years I'm falling for my first love all over again, but his unwillingness to see me on weekends is making me suspicious!
Q. I am a mature woman and know a thing about men over the years. I met up with my first love over a year ago and cutting a long story short we have been on a few dates and have slept together. It has all been on a friendly basis as I have just come ...
A. 13 August 2016: I don't think he wants a relationship at all. Someone who states that their week-ends are THEIRS and they want "alone time" what kind of future would ANYONE have with that person?
Playing "hard" to get is not going to change who he is and what he ... (read in full...)
Why is no one appetizing?
Q. Sorry just some Friday musing here. Dont mind me if there is a more serious question to be answered on here. Im a single female of 25 and use online dating as my main source of dating and its great! I get meet so many different men from all bac...
A. 12 August 2016: Take a little break from "trying" to find the next BF for a little who, go out with friend, have fun, do thing you enjoy, spend time with family. Make some "short term to do lists" of thing you want to do and see which are near enough that you can ... (read in full...)
Why can't our married friend break up with his mistress?
Q. Can anyone tell me why a married man keeps hanging onto his mistress for many years? She is high maintenance, is not always nice to him, is a drain on him physically and emotionally and causes him headaches and complications in his life. And ye...
A. 11 August 2016: Because he WANTS what he wants. OR... he is chasing a fantasy and not willing to accept that WHAT he has in not what he want it to be.
Maybe he actually LIKES the drama. I think there are a LOT of people out there who makes the presumpt... (read in full...)
Should I be offended by these comments?
Q. So recently I got a job offer in another city about five hours away from where me and my partner are both living together. Anyway so received feedback and I never got the job because I wasn't enthusiastic enough. Before my interview my boyfriend...
A. 11 August 2016: I think you are overthinking his reply. Making it out to be negative when it's not.
You are reading between lines that aren't there. YOU mind was telling you that YOU weren't good enough, so therefore you take HIS comment out of context to not o... (read in full...)
I don't want a gf but I don't want her to be with anyone else. what should I do?
Q. Sooo about 6 months I got a new roommate who happens to be a female. We became roommates after meeting once for about 10 minutes. We hit it off eight away as we are both direct and have weird personal issues that almost identical in how we handl...
A. 10 August 2016: If you think she was "good enough" to have as a F-buddy, but not "good enough" to date, you NEED to let her go find a guy who DO think she is "good enough".
If you on the other hand DO think you could date her, TALK to her. She might or mig... (read in full...)
He's telling them our relationship has ended before he even told me. How do I let go and move on from him?
Q. My partner and I have been together 6 and a half years, since I was 16. We both live with my parents and over the course of our relationship we have done for 3-4 years. Roughly 2 years ago, my partner dumped me, for me it was completely out o...
A. 10 August 2016: Honey, STICK with the notion that you want him out of your life, your house, your heart and your head. IT makes sense. LETTING him take advantage of you... DOESN'T.
Tell him to get the F out of your house. Give him 24 hours. Change the lock. Ma... (read in full...)
Any advice on this dysfunctional relationship?
Q. My partner moans at me 24/7, interspersed with some occasional flattery and friendship! He is charming to others. He doesn't like unleashing his temper when others are around to overhear particularly if they are male! He non-stop chips at my sel...
A. 10 August 2016: Why are you still with him? You would CLEARLY be better off without him, emotionally AND financially.
He isn't "acting" like a low-life - he IS a low-life.
It sounds like a miserable relationship that ANYONE could do without.
Why not put you... (read in full...)
My boyfriend said he doesn't want me to work with him 'in case I get upset because of what he says to other women?'
Q. Earlier this year my boyfriend of 6 years wanted to go for a very promising job opportunity and encouraged me to go for it as well. He said it wouldn't matter that we worked together, though I was sceptical as I don't want us to see 'too much' of ...
A. 10 August 2016: Don't take a job so you can "spy" on your partner. If you are happy where you are at and have prospect of promotions then don't change job. CERTAINLY not so you can "watch" him interact with other women.
If he is nervous about getting in trouble ... (read in full...)
Why do some girls go down market on social media?
Q. I know for guys these pictures can be nice eye candy. As a girl I can acknowledge if they have a nice body, but sometimes it seems a little distasteful. I'm talking about pictures with obvious cleavage, lingerie, side boob or whatever else. I feel ...
A. 10 August 2016: Attention, attention, attention.
Young women (AND MEN) are constantly bombarded with images that are highly sexualized. Actors (women specially) promotes their moves quite often with spreads in glossy magazines dressed in "classy" skimpy clothes.... (read in full...)
What can you do when you feel like you are losing "the one"?
Q. A girl that I've been in a very odd situation with for the past 1.5 years has just told me that she doesn't feel like it's a good idea to see each other anymore because the situation is basically never going to materialise into a relationship. ...
A. 10 August 2016: By accepting that she isn't "the One". The fantasy that YOU build (I'll quote you)
" I could see a future with her as far as saying I'd be happy to marry her"
THAT is a fantasy, because she WASN'T wanting the same thing WITH you.
Therefor... (read in full...)
I want to know when I will stop bloody crying and feeling so low!
Q. Dear aunts I won't make this too long. I discovered my husband is cheating online with some whore. His behaviour was suspicious as in him turning iPad away from me when I walked Into room. Got Into his iPad which was locked but had managed to see h...
A. 9 August 2016: OP, I'd call BS on the "father figure" excuse and honestly I think that is an insult to your intelligence to presume you would swallow that explanation. Like you said a women wouldn't send NUDES or talk sexual satisfaction or sex toy with someone ... (read in full...)
Was I rude to not text him? How should I handle things when I next see him?
Q. So 2 weeks ago , I was telling 2 of my co-workers that I have to go for my road test soon but I haven't mastered Paralell Parking. One of the guys said he can teach me and knows a very easy way to do it. Him and I joke around allot and he seems li...
A. 9 August 2016: I agree with Ciar, this is his "excuse" to keep texting you.
I'd just tell him that your parking is fine. (IF you want to show it off to him, do so).. if not... DON'T worry about it, you don't OWE him to show that you can do it.
How do you ha... (read in full...)
My Bf says I look too young. Is he embarassed to be seen with me? I'm 22.
Q. Hi guys, I have an issue with my boyfriend which is making me question myself. Basically, I am 22 and he is 28, I have always looked quite young but at 22 i still get mistaken for like 16 sometimes and usually people say i look young. I used to ...
A. 9 August 2016: Honestly?
WHY is is dating you then? If he is constantly embarrassed? It's not like he IS a pedophile, as he is dating 22 year old not a 9 year old.
And... looking like a 9 year old at 22? I doubt that. Why would he say hurtful things l... (read in full...)
He earns 8 times what I earn. Is it fair that I contribute 50 . 50 for all dating costs
Q. I've been dating a guy for about 6 months, he earns very good money (about 8 times what I do), should meals out/ trips away be split 50 / 50 , or should he be expected to pay more as he is the higher earner and had a lot more disposable cash than me ...
A. 9 August 2016: Should you pay 50%?
That depends.
Do you EAT 50% of what is order at the dinner? Let's say you DON'T make that much money, so when going out you order the "cheaper" stuff. No entree, no desert, just the meal and a drink. While HE orders entree... (read in full...)
He asks me when I am free and then cancels.Could he be seeing someone else?
Q. I need some advice...a Personal Trainer at the gym asked me out on a date several times...? I was a bit weary at first to go on a date with him, but he seemed really nice and we got on well. So, i said yes. We went on a date and it went well. ...
A. 9 August 2016: I'd say look elsewhere for someone to date. This guy isn't serious. Not about taking you out and anything further.
Maybe it's a game for him, chasing a girl UNTIL she shows interest, then it's off to the next.
Personally? I'd guess he has a G... (read in full...)
Girl I am seeing had affair with a man who later became her step-father. Am I being over sensitive about this?
Q. Hi all, I am wondering if you can provide a sounding board. I'll be brief. I met a girl on an internet site. She is from Eastern Europe. I live in US. Let's call her R. We got to talking for a few months and things seemed great. Then R. tol...
A. 9 August 2016: I agree with SVC
While I don't condone people cheating AT ALL, it's not really her "fault" that her mom married the guy she slept with. It sounds utterly dysfunctional or straight out of a tele novella.
I'm not American and yes, it would bo... (read in full...)
He asks me when I am free and then cancels.Could he be seeing someone else?
Q. I need some advice...a Personal Trainer at the gym asked me out on a date several times...? I was a bit weary at first to go on a date with him, but he seemed really nice and we got on well. So, i said yes. We went on a date and it went well. ...
A. 9 August 2016: Sounds like he is boosting his ego, not really caring about your feelings.
I would just tell him next time he ask you out that you will be busy washing your hair the next 6 months.
Also, if he is YOUR personal trainer and you PAY him to monit... (read in full...)
He's unhappily married. Does he like me or is it all in my head??!
Q. He's 37, I'm 24. He's married, unhappily I might add. So I would NEVER do anything. But, I have the feeling he has a thing for me. Based off of a few observations: - finds reasons to visit my department and talk to me for a long period of...
A. 9 August 2016: Who cares?
The guy is married.
All this spells TROUBLE for two people - YOU and his wife.
And honestly? IF the guy was OH SO unhappy in his marriage, why not divorce her and move on with life. In this day and age divorce isn't frowned up... (read in full...)
I want to know when I will stop bloody crying and feeling so low!
Q. Dear aunts I won't make this too long. I discovered my husband is cheating online with some whore. His behaviour was suspicious as in him turning iPad away from me when I walked Into room. Got Into his iPad which was locked but had managed to see h...
A. 9 August 2016: I'm so sorry.
This is not a great place to find yourself in. First of, calling her names doesn't make the situation any better for you. And being angry at her is UNDERSTANDABLE however, SHE haven't broken her marriage vows to you, she didn't c... (read in full...)
Should I even tell him? How can I, considering he's married?
Q. I really need to talk about this. Please don't judge me. I know I'm a idiot for getting into this mess. I have been sleeping with an older married man (49). I stopped all contact with him a few weeks ago, as I missed my period. I then went to the ...
A. 8 August 2016: I think he has the "right" to know that you are pregnant by him and that you intend on keeping it.
And your CHILD has a right to a father. To know WHO his father is. Even if the guy wants nothing to do with either of you.
YOU still have the R... (read in full...)
He says he's the victim. He's smug and confident and denies he hit me. How can I get my things back from him?
Q. I feel hurt by my ex and don't know what to do about it. Our relationship was just 6 months but very intense. He had a serious life threatening physical illness when I was with him and I had a mental breakdown shortly after from the stress of it bu...
A. 8 August 2016: I'd tell him this, IF he wants HIS stuff back... he can BRING your stuff over when he picks up HIS stuff. If he doesn't bring your stuff, he can't have his. Quid pro Quo.
... (read in full...)
Will I ever be able to forget my first sexual experience?
Q. Hi.. so basically, i cant forget about the guy that i had my first sexual experience with, and cant forget the experience itself. I'd just turned 16 and he was a little bit older. The experience itself was kind of rushed and clumsy, which doesnt ...
A. 8 August 2016: Will you be able to forget?
Probably not, but you will hopefully get to a point where you stop beating yourself up. EVERYONE makes mistakes in life. THIS was one of yours. A "major" one in the fact that you NOW feel bad about it a year later, o... (read in full...)
Dare I tell this younger woman how I feel?
Q. hi, my name is Roger. I am a 70 yr old man and I have become very friendly with a Romanian woman for over a year now, who is 31, and also married I can honestly say I have never got on so well with a woman in all my life we do many things together...
A. 8 August 2016: I don't know about the age gap, to me... 30+ years is HUGE that is a whole other generation.
BUT I don't think THAT is the big deal or issue here. The FACT that SHE is still married is the issue. Why declare yourself to a married woman?
You are... (read in full...)
Is it normal for your man to check out other women's behinds?
Q. Is it normal for your BF to check out other women's behinds? Whether you are around or not? Do all/most men check out other women's behinds even if they are in a happy, committed relationship with their wives/girlfriends? And even if their wives/g...
A. 8 August 2016: No one goes blind whether they have a partner or not.
We ALL notice attractive people. A nice set of legs, face, chest or butts. The "trick" is to USE your common sense and not ogle, not stare and be classy about it. Which means when you partner ... (read in full...)
My worklife has become uncomfortable since I dumped the guy I was dating. He is my boss. How should I handle this?
Q. I started dating a guy from work. I'd been single for a while and it was nice having someone interested in me. He wanted to tell everyone, i wanted to keep it quiet. I had previously dated someone from work albeit 4 years earlier but i wanted it ...
A. 8 August 2016: Don't beat yourself up, it will not fix a thing, OP
JUST learn from it. THAT can help you avoid this kind of thing in the future. I can imagine how easy it is to fall for someone you spend 40-60 hours a week with. It's not like it's uncommon... (read in full...)
How can I successfully negotiate these sensitive family issues?
Q. What a great site with assistance from people worldwide. Thanks in advance to all who respond...much appreciated. In about a weeks time I am planning to fly to another city to visit my brother and his second wife who have a two year old daughte...
A. 8 August 2016: I agree with Auntie BimBim
IF your friend (the ex-wife) starts to badmouth NIP IT in the bud in a nice and polite way, but also in a way that she can't dismiss it.
And if your nephew needs to vent, be kind and listen.
Don't forget YOU got ... (read in full...)
Do I tell my friend what her father said? What should I do?
Q. I went to a dinner party for one of my best friends, and her dad who is married complimented me twice. Both times I felt very uncomfortable. He called my name across the table, and begin to say how attractive I am. And as I was leaving the party he...
A. 8 August 2016: I wouldn't tell them. It will make you look like YOU are starting drama or looking for attention.
Stand up for yourself is ALWAYS a good thing.
If he complements you again, tell him thanks and change the subject. If he later on repeats it, t... (read in full...)
Social media addiction ... How can I stop experiencing this problem?
Q. Does anyone have any advice on how to stop this social media addiction- I am surrounded by fake friends and people I just waste time with that all they do and j used to do is post on social media to show off - buy clothes go to expensive dinners or ...
A. 8 August 2016: Delete your social media accounts? If you feel like you can't control yourself, maybe that is the way to go.
There really is no instant fix here. YOU have to decide what YOU want for YOUR life and then follow through.
If that means DELETE you... (read in full...)
Should I ask him if he is messing about with his old flings?
Q. Hi everyone, I got back with my ex who promised he would like to have a serious relationship with me and would not mess with other gals again. My rule is he can have his friends but he can't cheat - just be honest and he is free to go. Don...
A. 8 August 2016: Don't beat yourself up.
You didn't MAKE him cheat. And you didn't judge him for his past. NOTHING wrong in that.
Now you know. A guy who hasn't really dealt with issues from his past doesn't make a good partner.
Let it go. And let him go. H... (read in full...)
He says he's the victim. He's smug and confident and denies he hit me. How can I get my things back from him?
Q. I feel hurt by my ex and don't know what to do about it. Our relationship was just 6 months but very intense. He had a serious life threatening physical illness when I was with him and I had a mental breakdown shortly after from the stress of it bu...
A. 8 August 2016: ACCEPT that he is a total asshat and that you will NEVER see those things EVER again, the more you TRY and get them, the MORE he will resist. HE likes keeping your stuff because it makes him feel like he has power over you.
LEARN from this, do... (read in full...)
My worklife has become uncomfortable since I dumped the guy I was dating. He is my boss. How should I handle this?
Q. I started dating a guy from work. I'd been single for a while and it was nice having someone interested in me. He wanted to tell everyone, i wanted to keep it quiet. I had previously dated someone from work albeit 4 years earlier but i wanted it ...
A. 7 August 2016: Learn from it?
Don't crap where you eat, AKA don't date in the work place in the future.
I'd look for a transfer to a different office or team (if possible) or even start looking for another job. Until then, JUST be professional and... (read in full...)
Should I ask him if he is messing about with his old flings?
Q. Hi everyone, I got back with my ex who promised he would like to have a serious relationship with me and would not mess with other gals again. My rule is he can have his friends but he can't cheat - just be honest and he is free to go. Don...
A. 26 July 2016: What you have to decide if THIS guy is someone you can see yourself with long term, THAT would include whatever friends HE may have.
I think if you have suspicions and doubts ALREADY (or rather again) then maybe HE isn't worth trying a relation... (read in full...)
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