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... Send *indyCares a private message | | | *indyCares's profile:Hi everybody. I am an Italian woman currently living in Italy but I spent many years in England and USA. I hope my English is still decent but in case it got a little rusty, please be lenient.
My age ? Let say that I am way past the stage when you cry if the boy you like takes your best friend to the prom, and young enough to remember how awful that feels.
What qualifies me to help people- well, let me show off just a bit and mention that I studied Psychology 4 years in college, and, even if then I graduated in a different subject, I never lost my interest in psychology and kept reading a lot about this subject. Yet that does not really qualify me for anything because intellectual knowledge is not the same as real life experience. So let's say I feel I can advice people because I have lived a lot, travelled a lot, met a lot of people from all backgrounds , races and religions- I have loved a lot, and I have also been dumped a lot :)
Plus, I am really fascinated with people and their stories. Not in a gossipy way. I just find that every person is a whole new world that I am excited to discover.
Right now I am single- and happily so. I realized- better late than never - that rather than waiting for Prince Charming I should first become a Princess myself. You can't love anybody unconditionally, if first you don't love yourself unconditionally, and this is what I am learning to do.
Looking forward to hear from all of you..
Ciao
Cindy |
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| Latest articles: Devastation in Italy
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 August 2016: This has got nothing to do with romance or relationships or love- maybe with love for our fellow human beings, i.e. solidariety and compassion , so I hope that the mods will publish this regardless. On August 24th a devastating eartquak...
Ten best ways for a woman to be given her walking papers.
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 August 2014: Yeah I know : ultimately love is a mystery, not an exact science. There's always an element of sheer luck, of serendipity, of magic in it. Some times you do everything right, by the book, you are the perfect gf / wife / lover .. and you still get ...
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Why do people always say its good to be a virgin? what's so great about it?
Q. Im an 18yr old guy, just out of school, and I'm still a virgin...I don't understand why it's so hard...why I dislike it so much...I feel like I'm missing out...like everyone else is in on something that I'm not a part of. Then people say its a good ...
A. 11 September 2012: No,sorry, I do not see your point. In fact, I see it, but it makes me want to smile- a motherly ,affectionate smile, mind you :) I mean.... you have stopped looking for the right person " long time ago " ? How LONG, for Pete's sake, you are all of ... (read in full...)
Is simply being in love enough?
Q. So I used to date this girl for 3 years , 2 of which were sort of long distance. During that time we had our ups and downs and broke up a few times and always got back together. a few months back we broke up for the last time and she moved back h...
A. 23 June 2012: Yeh maybe she is not over you.. and surely you are not over her... and everybody's wasting their time so somebody needs to put a stop to this " not being over " and that somebody might as well be you :).
Be reasonable, OP, you want to write to h... (read in full...)
Is simply being in love enough?
Q. So I used to date this girl for 3 years , 2 of which were sort of long distance. During that time we had our ups and downs and broke up a few times and always got back together. a few months back we broke up for the last time and she moved back h...
A. 22 June 2012: " As if I could not give her all that ". Well, but you actually cannot .Because you can't be with her.
She is doing what she's got to do, perhaps, and not what she wanted to do deep in her heart, but anyway she IS doing it, and I think you shou... (read in full...)
Is simply being in love enough?
Q. So I used to date this girl for 3 years , 2 of which were sort of long distance. During that time we had our ups and downs and broke up a few times and always got back together. a few months back we broke up for the last time and she moved back h...
A. 20 June 2012: I know you don't want to hear this, but if I were you, I'd move on.Like, today. She has already ,... or at least she is way ahead of you and I don't think you can catch up with her anymore.
This moving on might have costed her , you know ? she ... (read in full...)
Is simply being in love enough?
Q. So I used to date this girl for 3 years , 2 of which were sort of long distance. During that time we had our ups and downs and broke up a few times and always got back together. a few months back we broke up for the last time and she moved back h...
A. 9 June 2012: Yes, it makes perfect sense. Like you said, you live in another country and you are not doing anything to go and get her, so what can she do but going on with her life. She is leaving the door emotionally slightly open, in the off chance that you ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend will be away for 2 weeks and I don't think I can cope with it
Q. Hi, My boyfriend of over 2 years is away to Europe for the next 2 weeks due to work commitments. We are extremely close, and best friends as well as a couple. This means that we see each other literally all the time and enjoy each other's constant...
A. 5 June 2012: OP, I hope this is just your depression talking.
Depressed people are very good at catastrophization. I.E. you want us to answer , based on your warped irrational unchallengeable perception that a 2 weeks absence of a partner is nece... (read in full...)
Why do people always say its good to be a virgin? what's so great about it?
Q. Im an 18yr old guy, just out of school, and I'm still a virgin...I don't understand why it's so hard...why I dislike it so much...I feel like I'm missing out...like everyone else is in on something that I'm not a part of. Then people say its a good ...
A. 5 June 2012: Why is it impossible for you to lose your virginity ?
As history has proven... What history, for Pete's sake ? ! You are all of ...18 !. So your "history " will be, what, one year or 18 months or so of half hearted , half assed attempts at dati... (read in full...)
I want to move out but boyfriend won't let me till he's ready to move in with me
Q. im 20 years old and my boyfriend is also 20. we've been together for over a year now and despite some rocky ups and downs we've been pretty happy with each other. Theres just something thats really irritating me at the moment and i dont know what...
A. 5 June 2012: You would be capable of living on your own, or with a roommmate, because everybody is. It does not take Einstein or a Ph.D. in Living-on-you-own skills.
And you don't have to do all your bf says when it is highly stressful and inconvenient for ... (read in full...)
How can I keep it a secret if I get involved with a married man?
Q. I posted a question earlier about a relationship with an older man who is married with children. I thought he was flirting with me and it turns out he was. We met to talk about the project we're both involved in and he drove me home (again!). I...
A. 5 June 2012: Uhm. So basically you are asking our help to backstab and hurt some poor woman that has never done anything to you.
I don't know if you'll get any help over here. And tbh, I hope you won't.
... (read in full...)
Why do people always say its good to be a virgin? what's so great about it?
Q. Im an 18yr old guy, just out of school, and I'm still a virgin...I don't understand why it's so hard...why I dislike it so much...I feel like I'm missing out...like everyone else is in on something that I'm not a part of. Then people say its a good ...
A. 5 June 2012: I don't quite understand your predicament.
You seem to give a disproportionate attention to what " people " say or think. What do YOU think ? People say all sort of things- some say that Justin Bieber is a great singer :). All opinions are resp... (read in full...)
Do I give my ex the 100th chance he wants, or a fresh start with someone I know will treat me better?
Q. I have a bit of a dilemma with two boys, me and my ex (j) who I've been on and off with for 9 months now and we have had some really bad relationship problems, and i was crazy about him but he has broke my heart so many times over the last 7-8 ...
A. 5 June 2012: You are kidding right ?.... Being 16 is a good excuse for being naive or unexperienced, but not for being codependent or totally irrational.
The 100 th second chance ?.... Only if you totally despise yourself , have no self respect, and WANT... (read in full...)
Were you scared when you had your children? Any regrets?
Q. In my early 30s, steady relationship, good job (hopefully it's gonna last...) and I'm starting to think about a baby with my husband. On the one hand I really loved the idea and it's all very exciting... on the other hand I am scared as hell. i ...
A. 5 June 2012: Strange way of putting it :)
Just being alive IS scary. Any moment,any day, something wrong may happen to you, as soon as you set foot outside, or even at home.
You may be run over by a car . Mugged. Pickpocketed. Bitten by a dog. Raped. K... (read in full...)
I am SO DONE with my MOTHER!
Q. i dont know what to do anymore! i am soooooo extremly annoyed my mom needs to stop she finds any EXCUSE to start nagging at me i honestly cant take it anymore! i dont wanna be at home i rather just runaway! if my bf has his hand over me i dont know ...
A. 4 June 2012: Growing pains :). Don't worry, it's normal, go check and you'll see that your friends too have more or less the same problems .
Nagging mothers are annoying- but they nag because they care, and they care enough to try and teach you right. I doub... (read in full...)
How do I get men interested regardless of my weight?
Q. Hi everybody. Before I had kids and met my ex I was 140 lbs and I would get approached by men left right and center. Now 3 kids and one divorce later it's like I don't get approached at all. I mean I'm a very pretty woman and all but the weight has ...
A. 4 June 2012: N91 is such a nice guy - his mom is a lucky woman :).
Reality is a bit different though , people tend to conform, or to aspire, to the standards of beauty which are current in their society , and if you happen to differ too much from them, well... (read in full...)
I told him I was sorry I created a drunken scene at his work, but I still havent heard from him in 2 weeks
Q. I have made some mistakes in my relationship with my last boyfriend. He is not perfect either. We were seeing each other for about 3 months. We rushed into the relationship. He is still legally married but separated. One day he said he wanted to ...
A. 4 June 2012: You made a drunken scene at his WORK ? Oh boy. I think that could have estinguished the fire in the most ardent of lovers- and this one was quite lukewarm to begin with, if he already felt smothered and needed " space " after just 3 months.
T... (read in full...)
He made plans and then just didn't show up!
Q. Hey guys,theres this guy who was introduced to me by my sister.He wanted to get know me....so ive known him for a month basicaly.Thing is he was to come to my town last weekend so that we could spend time together....but apparently he didn't come at ...
A. 4 June 2012: He is not your boyfriend , but he is absolutely rude regardless. It really takes minimal time and effort to make a quick call or send a text saying, sorry, can't make it this weekend, need to cancel- whomever you are, boyfriend, friend, ... (read in full...)
I can't put how I feel into words and he can't understand
Q. Hi all agony aunts, I need your advice. Me and my fiance have been together 2 years, and been engaged for 1. We both still live at our parents, but I'm moving away to university soon. What normally happens is he'll stay over a couple of days a...
A. 4 June 2012: I think you are overreacting. Quite simply, probably he needs his computer in the couple of days he spends apart from you, and owning a PC, which taking apart and setting up again takes all of two minutes, it's normal that he prefers using his own ... (read in full...)
I asked her out and she said "school first, boys later".
Q. Hi, You see, I've always ask this girl out on a date this past months but I keep getting rejection.She's a super cute girl , top of class and a bit tall. But Im taller. I obviously know that she has a crush on me. Whenever I report on cla...
A. 4 June 2012: I'd stop. There's a fine line between being persistent and making a pest of yourself, and you might have crossed it if you kept asking her out several times along the months, and she always said no.
She might have told you the truth, that she has ... (read in full...)
I never made much of an effort with b/f's family and now I regret it
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for three years now. And in those three years I have only met his mother twice, and his other family a few times and haven't spoke all that much to them. The reason I haven't made much of an effort is because I've ...
A. 4 June 2012: I don't think anybody should go out of their way for getting along with people who are into drugs. If there's really no way to avoid meeting them socially once in a while - sigh. So be it . But making a purposeful effort to hang out with them ... (read in full...)
I never made much of an effort with b/f's family and now I regret it
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for three years now. And in those three years I have only met his mother twice, and his other family a few times and haven't spoke all that much to them. The reason I haven't made much of an effort is because I've ...
A. 4 June 2012: I don't think anybody should go out of their way for getting along with people who are into drugs. If there's really no way to avoid meeting them socially once in a while - sigh. So be it . But making a purposeful effort to hang out with them ... (read in full...)
Fiance broke things off saying there's a 75% chance he'll come back. Is that good?
Q. Danny and I made a year May 27 and have been engaged almost a year. Tuesday he said he wanted to marry me and was in love with me and wasn't changing his mind. The wedding date was June 16. Well Wednesday he woke up to a small argument between my ...
A. 4 June 2012: ...And, would you take him back if he does come back ? After he just took and disappear on you few days before the wedding ? ... Would you take him back , knowing that there is a 75 % , or 57 % , ot 68 %, or whatever percentage , that he may do ... (read in full...)
How do I re-establish things after I messed up and groped my best-friend?
Q. I have a bestfriend, I have had feelings for her before and sometimes here and there. I felt as if it was some sort of thing telling me, "Oh she's the one" I had a friend tell me i might just be physically attracted to her which i am as well. A...
A. 3 June 2012: You are not about looking for advice about how to break it, and you don't need it, because quite possibly you broke it already.
If she really only saw you as a friend, and trusted you , and felt free to be physically affectionate with you ... (read in full...)
I'm only 14 and pregnant and I'm afraid to tell my b/f or family
Q. Hi. I have been with my boyfriend for 6 months, but 2 months ago we had sex. We did use a condom but I had many symptoms of being pregnant. I finally took a test 2 weeks ago and it was positive. I haven't told anybody except for my bestfrie...
A. 3 June 2012: I like that . " She won't judge ". Look, if you have to fear being judged for something , - then don't do that something that will make you judged to begin with !
Independence and adulthood is not doing whatever the f.. passes through your... (read in full...)
Would a FWB work for me? I only miss the physical part of a relationship
Q. Right everyone seems to think I'm scared of being alone because I've had two serious relationships by the time in 17, but the thing is I love being single But when I am single I miss having someone to hug kiss and have sex with so do you think if ...
A. 3 June 2012: No it does not make you a bad person, it makes you a naive one.
FWB is not "bad " and is not using anybody, until the two person are two consenting adults exactly on the same page and with the same expectations.
If they both just want no strings ... (read in full...)
Guys, how would you feel if an old flame sent you a message on facebook?
Q. This is a question for the guys.. how would you feel if an old flame sent you a message on facebook? just to ask if they had the right person? (am pretty sure it is the right person) Would it be a shock to see an ex after 17 years? I sent a messag...
A. 3 June 2012: " He could not even say hi "...
Facebooker's mentality,lol :).You've done without his " hi " for SEVENTEEN years, so for the last seventeen years saying hi to this guy has NOT ( very reasonably ) been on top of your priorities. But, the first mome... (read in full...)
Thoughts of being sexual with someone scares me.
Q. From what I can tell, my problem is me. I'm a twenty-one year old virgin, who is terrified of not only relationships, but sex in general. If I ever think about sex, I get uncomfortable thoughts and feel odd. As if the thought of being intimate with ...
A. 3 June 2012: Yes, you are overthinking it. It's normal- to some extent - being intimidated by any new experience. Probably yours is just shyness, or performance anxiety, or not feeling good about your body and looks - or a combination of all that.
Are you ... (read in full...)
I don't think I understand "flirting"
Q. Keep in mind, I never dated, or actively try to "flirt" with girls, but I do observe a lot, and I gotta say, I don't really understand it. For instance, one of the bigger things I've noticed is guys commenting on girls' physical features (and I mean ...
A. 3 June 2012: Yes, darling- you ARE out of touch.
Why is it so strange that telling a girl that she is cute or attractive would elicit a positive response ? It's a compliment ! People like compliments, and like to be appreciated, and even if they don't part... (read in full...)
Risk my heart for passion? Or not have passion but have stability?
Q. "John" is the father of my four year old daughter. He hasn't seen her in four years. My choice, because I don't like his lifestyle. He's a player, has to be out every single night, and my daughter is only one of three of his kids, all with ...
A. 2 June 2012: None. I wonder why people apparently always think that , given two bad choices,they MUST pick one. Not true, they can choose to pass.
George is emotionally unavailable and that bothered you enough to make you dump him recently, regardless of his ... (read in full...)
I failed second year at uni - so now I have to repeat it and all my friends will be gone
Q. So yeah I am aware this has nothing to do with relationships but need some help. Well just found failed second year at uni, now i dont know what to do, all I have been doing is crying which I am aware is silly as cant change it. But am scare...
A. 2 June 2012: It's good that it hit you hard, if you had taken your insuccess lightly, probably you would have been tempted to slack off this year too and risk another insuccess.
So, instead, you got a wake up call who will spur you to work harder and put more... (read in full...)
Her female friend seems a higher priority than our relationship. I'm seething. But how do I raise the issue?
Q. I've been in a new relationship about three months. I could get into the details of our relationship let me say its Good on all levels. I trust her. when she goes out with her friend i don't question her although it is a bit fustating, but im not ...
A. 2 June 2012: The way I understood it, the question title is a bit misleading. It sounds that your problem is that you caught your gf in a lie, not that she wants to spend time with friends.
It sounds to me as hers was the typical social " white lie ".
She ... (read in full...)
Guys, how would you feel if an old flame sent you a message on facebook?
Q. This is a question for the guys.. how would you feel if an old flame sent you a message on facebook? just to ask if they had the right person? (am pretty sure it is the right person) Would it be a shock to see an ex after 17 years? I sent a messag...
A. 2 June 2012: Don't take it so personally. Probably he is neither afraid of responding, nor has developped bad feelings in time, he is just not interested in this type of strolls down memory lane.
Avid Facebookers can't wrap their head around it, but there are ... (read in full...)
Why does my dad do this?
Q. I hate asking him for help with anything. So do my siblings. If you do ask, he turns everything around on you. He says things like "Why do I have to do EVERYTHING?" or "You'll have to wait, I'm doing everything else". "WHY am I the only person who ...
A. 1 June 2012: Don't " bring it up ", just save money and LEAVE. It is obvious that you won't leave with his blessing, so no point in wasting more years waiting that he comes around.
Once you have left- he won't be able to abuse you any more. ... (read in full...)
Why does my dad do this?
Q. I hate asking him for help with anything. So do my siblings. If you do ask, he turns everything around on you. He says things like "Why do I have to do EVERYTHING?" or "You'll have to wait, I'm doing everything else". "WHY am I the only person who ...
A. 1 June 2012: Don't " bring it up ", just save money and LEAVE. It is obvious that you won't leave with his blessing, so no point in wasting more years waiting that he comes around.
Once you have left- he won't be able to abuse you any more. ... (read in full...)
She claims to be a virgin. Am I wrong to have any doubts? She acts like a piece of wood during sex
Q. hello dear readers i do have the same problem, my girlfriend claims to be a virgin but during her fist sex she didnt bleed nor feel some great pains.to be honest she is so naive about sex, in which i trust her. she too is worry abut the situati...
A. 1 June 2012: She ( and you ) have nothing to worry about , some women bleed , some don't. Perfectly normal. As for the pain factor, that's very variable too, because it's mostly psycholigal, some girls feel a lot of pain because they are tense or afraid or ... (read in full...)
Regretting an argument over a guy, with another girl
Q. When I was 17/18, I had an argument with a girl over a guy. Typical girl problem, I know. I used to really like this guy (now, I think 'what the hell was i thinking?!'), but he ended up getting into a relationship with her. We used to bicker o...
A. 1 June 2012: I think the only sensible advice is telling you to keep doing what you are doing, i.e. ignoring them. But, REALLY ignoring them, not just pretending to ignore them. They actually do not exist for you- they are not your friends, not your family , ... (read in full...)
I feel like he's not over her -- am I wasting my time?
Q. I have been seeing a guy for the last year and recently we had the where is this going chat. He said he feels he wont be ready for a serious relationship for some time, I asked why this was and he said because he doesnt want to hurt his ex. They ...
A. 1 June 2012: He does not want to hurt his EX ?... Hurting her by what ?, by getting on with his life ? and having other relationships ?
He is SO not over her. She might have moved on and be completely not over him and not wanting him back ever - but he obvi... (read in full...)
Is a marriage between two alcoholics more likely to survive?
Q. Can a marriage survive if both husband and wife are alcoholics. I continue to read that chances of a marriage to a substance abuser of any kind most likely will not last but, if both of them are alcoholics that possess the same characteristics, ...
A. 31 May 2012: I don't think that a relastionship between two alcoholists has many chances to be long lasting..They have a passion in common, but it's not like sharing a passion for ballet or bird-watching .
Alcohol addicted are difficult to deal with. They... (read in full...)
Are his comments about losing weight unreasonable?
Q. I need to know if I am over-reacting to this situation. My fiance are a happy couple, mostly. We've been together a couple of years now, and I feel that he accepts me for who I am and all my flaws. Except one. I have a hormonal condition that m...
A. 31 May 2012: Maybe it's not all of a sudden . Meaning that maybe he has seen you for the last two years aknowledging that there is room for improvement, and that you would LOVE to be slimmer- but improvement has not been made and nothing has changed in two ... (read in full...)
What is the "deep-stick" position?
Q. I met a girl on an dating club and her profile states that she loves the deepstick position and I don't have an idea of how this position looks like or how it works and I don't want to ask her. I need to know before we get to it. ...
A. 31 May 2012: She lies on her back with her legs resting on your shoulders, and you enter her from a kneeling position.... (read in full...)
I'm 15 and want to have a baby even though I'm not ready
Q. I'm 15 and I feel like I want to have a baby even though I know I'm not ready financially. Why do I feel like this? How can I push the thought away? I have been in a relationship for almost 3 years now and we have talked about having kids but not ...
A. 31 May 2012: Hormones.
Economical and cultural evolution in modern society has neatly differentiated and separated the moment of sexual maturation and the moment of conceiving. It did not use to be like that until surprisingly recent times even in West... (read in full...)
He already has a girlfriend of a year and has been married twice
Q. A man recently added me on Facebook through a good mutual friend. First we just made friendly conversation and such, then he asked if I wanted to meet up for coffee. I agreed. We got along really well. He already has a girlfriend of a year and has ...
A. 31 May 2012: Bit of fun. You are exchanging intimate, explicit texts after having met ONCE for coffee. Meeting that happened behind his gf's back, and this should tell you how reliable this guy is.
He may ( or may not ) have split from his ex, but still he i... (read in full...)
I want him to realize how bad his current relationship is, if nothing else!
Q. Ok. So when I was about 13, I met a guy. I thought he was around my age...but as it turned out he was 22. So, I didn't think of him in that fashion. BUT he was still a cool guy, so I continued to hang out with him. He quickly became the best friend ...
A. 31 May 2012: Nothing. You can say all you want, and have all the mind trips you want, but the fact remains that you can't be sure his r/ship is unhappy, and that if it is, it's none of your business. He is an ADULT ( albeit an immature adult that gets crushes ... (read in full...)
Looking at live people online having sex is wrong, but seeing naked girls dance and grind on men is ok?
Q. Ok, So I was on here yesterday and saw a question about a girl who's boyfriend was looking at online porn chat shows. Almost everyone replied and said that he was wrong and that isn't appropriate in a relationship; that he was taking it a step too ...
A. 31 May 2012: I am not an expert on either one, on line porn shoes and strip clubs. ( Particularly on the first, because strip clubs, I 've been to ). So maybe I am saying something stupid or incorrect. But I'd think that the difference is in the fruition of ... (read in full...)
Is he in love with me or not?
Q. I need some advice badly. My boyfriend was very sexualy active with me when we got together, we held hand, hugged all the time, kissed all the time. all the things that lovers do, in the begining, but There a side to this, when we got together I was ...
A. 31 May 2012: You may have much to offer but you are offering it to the wrong person. Quite frankly, I don't even understand how can you think he is in love with you, and what " signs " you are looking for. If he was still in love with you, you would not be ... (read in full...)
Is simply being in love enough?
Q. So I used to date this girl for 3 years , 2 of which were sort of long distance. During that time we had our ups and downs and broke up a few times and always got back together. a few months back we broke up for the last time and she moved back h...
A. 31 May 2012: Eh yes, I am afraid I agree.
Letting go of something that gave so many exciting romantic moments is undoubtly hard. But, alas, there is not just " you and I " in a vacuum- a couple can't just exist and be happy forever just kissing and hold... (read in full...)
Do drunk people mean what they say?
Q. Hey everyone, So, I need to talk to someone and I have absolutely no one to confide in. This might be long, so thank you in advance for reading, I appreciate it so much. Me and this guy have been a "thing" for over two years, he's asked me to...
A. 31 May 2012: Of course not. Or, in fact, they do mean it in their booze fuelled hyperemotional altered state.... but once they are sober quite often they may have forgotten all about it, or remember it and feel totally ashamed about it.
You can only coun... (read in full...)
Is simply being in love enough?
Q. So I used to date this girl for 3 years , 2 of which were sort of long distance. During that time we had our ups and downs and broke up a few times and always got back together. a few months back we broke up for the last time and she moved back h...
A. 29 May 2012: Sorry, I had not seen your update before posting my answer.
Well, then, is a no go, I guess.
Regardless of the ping pong thing , and the systems she uses to pressure you- which do not bide well for the future of the r/ship.
The problem is ,... (read in full...)
Is simply being in love enough?
Q. So I used to date this girl for 3 years , 2 of which were sort of long distance. During that time we had our ups and downs and broke up a few times and always got back together. a few months back we broke up for the last time and she moved back h...
A. 29 May 2012: It sounds that the choices are limited, which is not bad, it leaves less room for confusion.
- Go no contact and move on ( I vote for that , to me it sounds like she has shipped out, even if she still feels wistful about the past ).
- Take all... (read in full...)
Is simply being in love enough?
Q. So I used to date this girl for 3 years , 2 of which were sort of long distance. During that time we had our ups and downs and broke up a few times and always got back together. a few months back we broke up for the last time and she moved back h...
A. 29 May 2012: Simply being in love is never enough -for many reasons, beside the presence of obstacles ,but that would be long to debate and not really relevant to your case.
Just let me stress that yes, exactly, when there are obstacles " being in love " me... (read in full...)
Why does my dad do this?
Q. I hate asking him for help with anything. So do my siblings. If you do ask, he turns everything around on you. He says things like "Why do I have to do EVERYTHING?" or "You'll have to wait, I'm doing everything else". "WHY am I the only person who ...
A. 4 July 2011: So ? ... If your parents are so dysfunctional,one more reason and incentive to get the hell out of there !
The hard, cold truth is that , now matter how bad are the cards we have been dealt with, ultimately WE have the responsibility to play them... (read in full...)
Why does my dad do this?
Q. I hate asking him for help with anything. So do my siblings. If you do ask, he turns everything around on you. He says things like "Why do I have to do EVERYTHING?" or "You'll have to wait, I'm doing everything else". "WHY am I the only person who ...
A. 2 July 2011: But, it's NOT up your parents , it's up to you.
You are responsible for directing your life in the course that canmake you happier, and luckily you work and can pay for everything you want.
If you don't do it just because your dad will grumble ... (read in full...)
Why does my dad do this?
Q. I hate asking him for help with anything. So do my siblings. If you do ask, he turns everything around on you. He says things like "Why do I have to do EVERYTHING?" or "You'll have to wait, I'm doing everything else". "WHY am I the only person who ...
A. 17 June 2011: Then don't ask him anything, or limit your request to a bare indispensable minimum. That will train you to be independent and self reliant, and won't give him the satisfaction to go on about your lazyness.
I think that without noticing you mayb... (read in full...)
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