His wondering eyes lead him to unconscious actions!
Q. Is it normal to do things subconsciously without realizing what you are doing after the fact? I've caught my fiancee three times where he would let go of my hand when a hot/cute/good looking female passes us by. It's irritating and just I believe ...
A. 31 January 2011: I'm happy you spoke with your fiance about his actions. Communication is key in any relationship. Did you ask him why he acted like he did at the restaurant? Or did he do it in retaliation because he thought you were flirting with men one night? ... (read in full...)
Why is my boyfriend of 8 years pushing me away?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 8 years this year, last year he went through a tough time at work he lost his job as a manager and now works on the floor where he managed but only temporary until later this year, then hes out, he was very ...
A. 29 January 2011: I can understand why you are concerned. Is this the first time he has ever pushed you away? It definitely sounds like he is avoiding you. Either he is depressed and needs his medication altered, or he is thinking about ending the relationship. ... (read in full...)
Why do the girls I like seem more interested in guys way less successful than me?
Q. Help, I need major help getting on track! Hello all. I am 27 and for all intents and purposes I consider myself a virgin (the one night of 5-hour attempt where I got no pleasure doesn't count). I can't find anyone compatible and I try eve...
A. 29 January 2011: You sound like a good catch! One thing working against you is your decision to not have children. For most women, this is a dealbreaker. However, there are plenty of women out there who feel the same way as you. You may want to broaden the age ... (read in full...)
Best way to apologise? And what about the confusing dreams?
Q. hellos thank you very much. me and my ex broke up four weeks ago. I broke up with her because her explanation to a certain text to her 'friend' was not satisfactory. We were having problems too but I was the centre. Communication has been minimal...
A. 29 January 2011: I am sorry about your recent break-up. I have no doubt that you are feeling hurt and confused. I will do my best to answer your questions.
a) It's hard to say what she is feeling right now. She reached out to you and asked if you if you stil... (read in full...)
Honeymoon & Birth control
Q. My fiancé and I plan on not using protection on our honeymoon except for when she says it's time to start "being careful". That should be about the last few days of our week in Florida. She isn't okay with birth control so I will use a condom. Her ...
A. 29 January 2011: Looks like everybody has given some good suggestions. I just wanted to add one thing. Under the most ideal conditions (ideal vaginal/uterine environments, fertile cervical mucous, strong sperm health, etc), it is thought that sperm may be able to ... (read in full...)
Threesomes, Texts, Truths and Drama
Q. Okay, I have this friend, we'll call her Moon. Now she and I have been friends for almost five years. I've seen her go through several boyfriends, as she has seen me do. Her boyfriends though, ranged from emotionally abusive, spoiled brats, t...
A. 29 January 2011: Let me get this straight… your dear friend Moon and her bf Chaos broke up, you and your roommate Murphy swooped in on Chaos, got drunk with him, played a “nice game of truth or dare” (your exact words), you kissed Chaos, and then you “ended up ... (read in full...)
How can I tell my mistress to get an abortion... NOW!
Q. Hi. Just seeking some advice. I have been married for 7 yrs been with wife for almost 15. she's older than me by a couple of years (I am 37 my wife is 43 and my lover is 35). , but I think she is my soul mate. I cheated on her before this time, but ...
A. 29 January 2011: What a mess! You go on and on about how much you love your mistress and don't want to hurt her, but you hardly mentioned anything about your poor wife's feelings! Your mistress is 4 months pregnant... from what I know, it's too late for an ... (read in full...)
The pain during periods is so intense I feel like I am dying, and to top things off I saw my ex boyfriend with another girl...!
Q. I have tried everything - pain killers, hot water bottle, chocolate, etc. Nothing works! My doctor said that my uterus lining sheds too many nerves, and that's why I get so much pain. Well, I am fed up with it. I'm 17 years old and the last thi...
A. 29 January 2011: I'm sorry you had a bad week! As for your cramps... have you tried birth control pills? They can help alleviate the pain from menstrual cramps. You don't have to be sexually active to be on birth control pills. In fact, I had a friend in high ... (read in full...)
She hasn't told anyone we broke up, what does this mean?
Q. what does it mean when you split up from a parter of three years, but they havent told their parents, friends, or even changed her relationship status or pix of the two of you on FB?me and my ex gf broke up and she wants to stop talking for a little ...
A. 28 January 2011: Absolutely! I know you are going through a tough time, we've all been there! I would be more than happy to help you out. ... (read in full...)
She has a profile on a website designed for married people to cheat....I'm not sure if I can be with her anymore knowing she could do this
Q. I have just discovered (or rather the computer repairer told me) that during a period where we broke up, my girlfriend had joined a site that is there for married people to cheat on each other . She`s down as single but seeking attached or married ...
A. 28 January 2011: Why are you still with this woman? Obviously, she finds nothing wrong with having sex with married men. Her account is still active, so there's no telling what she has been up to. It doesn't matter... the fact is, she lacks morals.
How bad does... (read in full...)
She hasn't told anyone we broke up, what does this mean?
Q. what does it mean when you split up from a parter of three years, but they havent told their parents, friends, or even changed her relationship status or pix of the two of you on FB?me and my ex gf broke up and she wants to stop talking for a little ...
A. 28 January 2011: Here is my advice... do not contact her. Let her get in touch with you after the weekend. If you continue to call and text her, she will be less inclined to get back together with you. I know it will be difficult to refrain from contacting her... ... (read in full...)
His wondering eyes lead him to unconscious actions!
Q. Is it normal to do things subconsciously without realizing what you are doing after the fact? I've caught my fiancee three times where he would let go of my hand when a hot/cute/good looking female passes us by. It's irritating and just I believe ...
A. 28 January 2011: You are wise to question your future with this man. It's one thing for a man to quickly glance at an attractive woman that passes by, but it's an entirely different case when the man continues to look in her direction, let's go of your hand, and ... (read in full...)
She hasn't told anyone we broke up, what does this mean?
Q. what does it mean when you split up from a parter of three years, but they havent told their parents, friends, or even changed her relationship status or pix of the two of you on FB?me and my ex gf broke up and she wants to stop talking for a little ...
A. 28 January 2011: I agree wholeheartedly with HC. My instincts tell me she is either afraid to tell others about the breakup, or she is struggling with second thoughts. I think it's best to give her some time to digest the situation, so she can figure out what her ... (read in full...)
Should I leave, so she can find someone who will make her happier? Don't want to lose the love of my life!
Q. I have been with my wife for 9 years, married for 3. I love her like no other and we have 3 boys together. About 4 months ago, we really had problems. I got so depressed and turned to trying to kill myself, but by the grace of god and my loving ...
A. 28 January 2011: Annalisa has given you excellent advice! Please do not leave your wife. You are still in love with her, and she does not want you to leave! That tells me this marriage is not over... it just needs some work.
Most importantly, are you cont... (read in full...)
Younger husband wants to have a baby even though I am 48 with tubes tied and had major back surgery
Q. My husband is from another country he has just finally arrived in the U.S. about 10 months now, before we got married he said he wanted children, but I told him my tubes where tide and not sure if I wanted more, but I love him and I know he would be ...
A. 28 January 2011: I think it's great that you want to give your husband a child of his own. In this situation, it's best not to get your hopes too high. It sounds like you are very religious, so I will remind you that God sometimes works in strange ways. It's ... (read in full...)
Should I reunite a decade later with a long lost friend?
Q. Does anyone have any stories involving reunions with long lost friends/interest that end well? When I was 20, I met a man while interning in a city over the summer. He was 40 at the time and we hung out just talking and walking around the city....
A. 28 January 2011: I would give him a chance to show that he has changed. You could do one of a couple things... The first option is to go ahead and add him as a friend on Facebook. If you don't want him to know you are moving to his city in 2 months, you can set ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend goes out of his way for a woman he is not even good friends with. Is he interested in her?
Q. Hi. My boyfriend of 1 year avoids me often, and says he is busy at work. He takes extreme measures to help a girl whom he is not close friends with, but when I asked him for a favour (which will not take more than 15 mins for him to do) he said he ...
A. 28 January 2011: I have to admit, I think you have good reason to be concerned. If your boyfriend avoids you often, and does things for other women, but won't do them for you... I would have a serious talk with him.
If he continues to treat you this way... y... (read in full...)
I want to ask about a new facebook friend but I don't want to come across as clingy
Q. I was just wondering if there is a way to ask my girlfriend about a guy she recently added on facebook without coming across as clingy? I don't normally ask about guys but this one is kind of fishy...is there a way to go about this? I hate coming ...
A. 28 January 2011: In a nonchalant and non-accusatory tone, say something like, "Whose your new friend on facebook?" You could add something like, "He looks so familiar... how do you know this guy?" or instead you could say, "He looks so much like this guy John I ... (read in full...)
I cheated and my boyfriend ended things
Q. Hello, right now i feel like shit,i have been a bit bad and cheated the odd time. Its lead to break up after break up,he wont let it drop. I have never admitted it as he will end it,i know he wont come back if i do. He turned off his phone last ...
A. 28 January 2011: I'm a little confused by your post. Hopefully, you can clarify something for me. So, you cheated on your boyfriend, he somehow found out, but you refused to fess up, and arguments over this have led to multiple break ups. Then, he texted you and ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to have a quick look at other men's junk?
Q. Hello! I'm 20 and I'd like to know if it's normal to have a quick at the other dude's penis in the locker room...? I don't feel like I'm gay but I guess I'm just curious about the others size and shape......
A. 28 January 2011: The Realist pretty much summed up my thoughts as well! It's absolutely normal to be curious about the way others look. Don't worry, there's nothing wrong with you, we all do it! ... (read in full...)
Is my husband just not aware of his embarrassing behavior?
Q. I'm separated from my 57yr old husband as I found hundreds of porn images hidden on disc and on our computer last year, he'd promised me before that he would stop he always lies about this sort of thing.Although he no longer has access to our ...
A. 27 January 2011: Personally, I wouldn't have a problem with him looking at porn, unless he is looking at underage girls. However, I realize there are many women who do not want their husbands looking at porn.
As for his behavior in public... that's another ... (read in full...)
If he is the father to another womans baby what should I do
Q. What should I do??? My boyfriend of 3 months (who is 24) and I (I'm 21) met and fell in love very quickly, despite previous heartbreaks in serious relationships for both of us, but due to stress he was going through with his family we "broke up" for ...
A. 27 January 2011: I agree 100% with guillaume. You have only been dating for three months, so it would be in your best interest to leave the relationship now. I know this is not the advice you wanted to hear, but you are too young to settle for a man like this. If ... (read in full...)
Why is my colleague being so overprotective?
Q. I think a guy where I work likes me but I'm not sure. He treats me differently from everyone else (he's not my boss) in that he seems very protective of me in the workplace and is always stressing that if I have problems with certain people at work ...
A. 27 January 2011: I meant to reply to this question earlier, but I guess I got sidetracked! Any updates? From what you've told us, it sounds like he is attracted to you. That's why he gets so jealous when other men in the office pay attention to you.
He may have... (read in full...)
I was fine with my girlfriend being an escort ...but now her proximity to a certain client is really bothering me...
Q. I came across this blog and read a couple of them.I am a boyfriend of a escort, I have been her boyfriend for 6 years, she has been a escort for almost 3 years. I am fine with it, She did it for the bills of course.Now We just came into a situation ...
A. 27 January 2011: If your wife isn't charging this man for "extras" you should be very concerned. It sounds like she has developed some feelings for him. Honestly, you are partially to blame for this mess because you allowed your wife to become an escort.
... (read in full...)
I had sex with my mother's friend. I'm worried she will find out!
Q. Hi. So I'm a bit a stuck with a situation and I don't know how to get out! My parents are both in their mid 40s, I'm 18, and I have a 4 week old daughter. I've been through shit (I guess it's relevant to say), and my parents have recently been ...
A. 27 January 2011: Perhaps you should have a talk with Lee and tell him to keep this encounter between the two of you. I am curious though... how old is Lee? Is he single? And what kind of relationship does he have with your parents? ... (read in full...)
Did I make the right decision allowing my son back into their lives?
Q. I have a dilema. I recently started allowing my son (I'll call him Elijah) to see his father's side of the family. He is 18 months old and hasn't seen them in 14 months. During the four months I was still married to his father we lived at his ...
A. 27 January 2011: This is an excellent question, and I can't believe I'm the first person to respond! You have done the right thing! It's important that your son be allowed to develop a relationship with his father's family.
I sense there are some underlyi... (read in full...)
Does my husband have the right to be upset about a one night stand when we were separated?
Q. I'm so confused and need some advice. Let me start out by saying I am married, I love my husband and I have no intention on leaving him. Basically my question right now is does my husband have the right to be mad and upset at me for having a one ...
A. 27 January 2011: Think about what you have just written... "Even though it seems so obvious that I should move on, when I'm with him I just can't."
It's obvious to everyone, including yourself that this is not going to have a happy ending. You "can" leave hi... (read in full...)
Why is my boyfriend of 8 years pushing me away?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 8 years this year, last year he went through a tough time at work he lost his job as a manager and now works on the floor where he managed but only temporary until later this year, then hes out, he was very ...
A. 27 January 2011: Thank you for the update. His demotion and pending job loss is a huge punch to his ego. Is he still being treated for depression?
When you spoke with him, did you ask him where your relationship stood? I can't help but wonder if he is think... (read in full...)
Who is the girl he has been seeing behind my back
Q. Something horrible happend to me a few months ago. and since then I have lost respect for my bf.i've tried to put it behind me but it keeps replaying its self back in my mind. One day my bf was meant to collect me from work. i received a text from ...
A. 27 January 2011: Congratulations! You have done the best thing for yourself! If he comes back groveling and begging for your forgiveness, do not give him the time of day! He has shown his true colors, and he will show them again. Take some time to get over him, ... (read in full...)
Does my husband have the right to be upset about a one night stand when we were separated?
Q. I'm so confused and need some advice. Let me start out by saying I am married, I love my husband and I have no intention on leaving him. Basically my question right now is does my husband have the right to be mad and upset at me for having a one ...
A. 27 January 2011: You have done absolutely nothing wrong! Let me get this straight... your husband had an affair, left you for this other woman, got her pregnant, told you to go out, have fun, and meet other guys, you did just that, he moved back in with you, you ... (read in full...)
Flat tire, 6mo preggo, and bf is more worried about his xbox game?
Q. So I got a flat tire on my way to work. I'm 6 months pregnant and have no cell phone and live in MN where it was a balmy 20*f out today. I was able to stop someone driving by to use their phone and call my dad. My dad came and helped me, the only ...
A. 27 January 2011: Unless he makes a habit of this, I would forgive him. Be certain to let him know that it hurt your feelings though. When you called him from work, it's quite possible he had just discovered his game was scratched, and was a bit irritated.
In th... (read in full...)
Whenever I'm home, I want to go back to uni, but when I'm at uni, I want to come home!
Q. Dear all, I don't really have a relationship question but if anyone could give me some advice I'd really grateful. Basically, I'm struggling to cope with my emotions. I've gone through a lot of changes over the last year and I've also been under ...
A. 26 January 2011: I agree with Dirtball... additional information would be helpful. It sounds like something painful happened last year at this time, and you have not resolved your feelings regarding this issue. Without knowing more, I can only say that problems ... (read in full...)
Why is my boyfriend of 8 years pushing me away?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 8 years this year, last year he went through a tough time at work he lost his job as a manager and now works on the floor where he managed but only temporary until later this year, then hes out, he was very ...
A. 26 January 2011: Your boyfriend has gone through a very rough time, so I can understand why he would be depressed. Is he still being treated for depression? If not, it sounds like he is becoming depressed again.
If you've been dating for 8 years, and his phon... (read in full...)
My extremely irritating roommate is getting on my nerves...what do I do?
Q. Last semester I had asked one of my friends to become my roommate for this semester. However, so far it has not been a good start between us even though she believes its all good. I think the problem I have is that our friendship is not really a ...
A. 26 January 2011: When I was in college, one thing I heard over and over again was that you never want to room with your friends! Now… it does appear that your roommate is somewhat immature and lacks respect for your belongings. This is not uncommon, but it can ... (read in full...)
Should I tell her that her fiance cheated on her?
Q. Last summer, I met a guy. Well, we were just friends. We hung out with each a few times. He introduced me to his friends and introduced him to my sister. I thought we were going to begin a relationship. Well, he went home to visit family. A few da...
A. 26 January 2011: I realize you were disappointed that he chose this other girl to be his girlfriend when you thought the two of you were going to begin a relationship. Unfortunately, you have to let this man go. He is only using you for oral sex.
As fa... (read in full...)
Should we tell our good friend that we saw her new husband on an online dating website?
Q. Dear Agony Aunt, I am in a group of 8 women that travel and play a sport together. We have known each other a very long time and are good friends. One of my friends divorced her husband of 25 years to be with another man. This man had been single ...
A. 26 January 2011: I'm sorry, I thought they were married. Thank you for responding with more information. I can understand why you and your friends are so concerned.
I assume this couple is in a committed relationship... at least, that's what your friend was led ... (read in full...)
Should we tell our good friend that we saw her new husband on an online dating website?
Q. Dear Agony Aunt, I am in a group of 8 women that travel and play a sport together. We have known each other a very long time and are good friends. One of my friends divorced her husband of 25 years to be with another man. This man had been single ...
A. 25 January 2011: I'm a little confused about something you wrote, so hopefully you can clarify it for me. You stated, "The site will have him as active in a couple of days, and then not active for a long time and then active in a couple of days...over and over." ... (read in full...)
Who is the girl he has been seeing behind my back
Q. Something horrible happend to me a few months ago. and since then I have lost respect for my bf.i've tried to put it behind me but it keeps replaying its self back in my mind. One day my bf was meant to collect me from work. i received a text from ...
A. 25 January 2011: I really like rdbrown's advice about instilling a positive outlook on life. However, this requires cleansing one's life of negative influences... rather than ignoring them. That being said, you really should get rid of your shady boyfriend. ... (read in full...)
Advice on how to help me get over my stutter
Q. hey, i've got quite a bad stutter, and more often than not whenever i approach people they can't get past it and although are kind to me while i'm there, once i leave i hear them tease me and take the mickey. this obviously takes a toll on my con...
A. 24 January 2011: I'm sorry you are experiencing problems with stuttering. Are you aware that some of the most famous people in history were stutterers? Marilyn Monroe, Carly Simon, James Earl Jones, Tiger Woods, Bruce Willis, Mike Rowe... the list goes on! Don't ... (read in full...)
Last year I slept with a co-worker. Now she will not let me forget it. How do I handle the problems she's causing me?
Q. In November, I slept with a co-worker. I'm married and I know I screwed up. Right after it happened, I felt guilty and told her that it would never happen again.Well, my wife works with us, and the co-worker has been dropping hints left and righ...
A. 24 January 2011: Thanks for the update! You are making the right decision. There is too much of a chance your wife will find out about the affair from this woman or other co-workers. Has this woman told any of your co-workers? You might want to find this out. ... (read in full...)
Do men settle for just an emotional relationship?
Q. I need some help here. Why would a man seek an emotional connection with a women besides his wife? I met someone a few years ago. I had an immediate attraction but stayed away as I knew he was married with kids. We work for the same company but are ...
A. 24 January 2011: I'm a little confused. Hopefully, you can clarify something for us. Your questions asks, "Why would a man seek an emotional connection with a WOMAN besides his wife?" However, your profile states that you are male? Is that a mistake? I'm just ... (read in full...)
I find myself falling for a man who already has a girlfriend.
Q. Hi I am 45, recently divorced and redundant. Due to all these reasons I have been fairly depressed. I recently met a 37 year old guy at a party socially who befriended me and showed me a lot of sympathy. He also seems attracted to me. As a result I ...
A. 24 January 2011: Thanks for the update! Since you are not an assertive person, I'm not sure you will have the strength to stand up to this man... so it's best that you cut ties with him altogether, or at the very least... maintain only a phone/text/email friendship ... (read in full...)
I cant have children but would like to date a woman who has children so I can be a role model
Q. I'm 32 years old and recently divorced 11 months ago after a 3 year marriage. My ex left me after we were trying to have a child, she couldn't get pregnant and after numerous tests it came back that I'm sterile and unable to father a child, she ...
A. 23 January 2011: You sound like a great guy! Personally, I don't think you are being unrealistic or shallow at all. You have a lot to offer a single woman with children. There are women who have been widowed, or have had children with deadbeat fathers... and ... (read in full...)
I find myself falling for a man who already has a girlfriend.
Q. Hi I am 45, recently divorced and redundant. Due to all these reasons I have been fairly depressed. I recently met a 37 year old guy at a party socially who befriended me and showed me a lot of sympathy. He also seems attracted to me. As a result I ...
A. 23 January 2011: You and this man are engaging in an emotional affair, and if you don't stand up to him now, this affair will soon become physical. If this happens, you will only end up falling harder for this man. Unfortunately, he has a girlfriend, so you will ... (read in full...)
Last year I slept with a co-worker. Now she will not let me forget it. How do I handle the problems she's causing me?
Q. In November, I slept with a co-worker. I'm married and I know I screwed up. Right after it happened, I felt guilty and told her that it would never happen again.Well, my wife works with us, and the co-worker has been dropping hints left and righ...
A. 22 January 2011: Your co-worker is feeling rejected and angry. If her feelings build up, she will likely say something to your wife. As hard as this may be, it is best that your wife hear the news from you, instead of your co-worker. Yes, your wife will feel ... (read in full...)
Last year I slept with a co-worker. Now she will not let me forget it. How do I handle the problems she's causing me?
Q. In November, I slept with a co-worker. I'm married and I know I screwed up. Right after it happened, I felt guilty and told her that it would never happen again.Well, my wife works with us, and the co-worker has been dropping hints left and righ...
A. 22 January 2011: Your co-worker is feeling rejected and angry. If her feelings build up, she will likely say something to your wife. As hard as this may be, it is best that your wife hear the news from you, instead of your co-worker. Yes, your wife will feel ... (read in full...)
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