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... Send *rmyMedic a private message | | | *rmyMedic's profile:I'm a married, 29 year old from the UK.
I'm a sergeant in the British Army, so I deal with young people (mostly teens), who have all the usual dramas and long distance relationship issues.
My speciality is Medicine I've spent the last 12 years as an army medic, which means I have lots of experience in trauma (which isn't very helpful here), Sports therapy, travel medicine, and GU medicine (Sexual Health).
When I found out about this site, it seemed to be another way to help people out. But I am very straight talking, so please don't be too offended if you don't like my honest opinions.
If there is any advise you should take away from this site it is: Never do anything that you can't explain to a Paramedic and always practice safe sex. |
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| Latest articles: STI/STD what are they and how do you catch them?
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 April 2009: STI/STD what are they and how do you catch them? An STI is a sexually transmitted infection this is the "in vogue" name for what used to be called an Sexually transmitted disease (STD) This can range from pubic lice to AIDS and Hepatitis with m...
Why don't boys reply to my texts?
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 April 2009: Why don't boys reply to my texts? This is a commonly asked question at dear cupid and I understand it really isn't as important as a domestic violence question, but I feel it needs answering. Now this is just a personal opinion and if any guys ...
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13, pregnant from first time and it was a dare
Q. Hey i have just turend 13 in december and just found out i am pregnant since I am really young and only just started my period in november i had sex in march and only slept with one lad a dont know what to do but i dont want an abortion but in a...
A. 2 May 2009: Does it matter if the Nurse goes to social services? Why are you so scared of them? Social services are there to help people like you!
Why not take a look at their website and actually see what they do: http://w... (read in full...)
Sees me out, we have sex, and then he doesn't get back to me! Its happened twice!
Q. Im gonna be honest from the start about my problem and would like honest answers. Back in December I slept with a man who afterwards didnt want to know me because I had a drug problem. I did have a cocaine problem until January of this year when his ...
A. 15 April 2009: This sounds very strange and one sided, I think without sounding too mean, he has used you and knows he can go out, say a few sweet things and bed you! He's done that 3 times already and still isn't putting any effort in.
I understand you have... (read in full...)
Got my mistress AND my wife pregnant. Now my wife is being difficult. Shall I leave her?
Q. Last month I asked a question about how I could get my wife to forgive me after I had an affair and the other women got pregnant. Thankfully she forgave me but now things seem to be getting worse rather then better. My wife told me that she too is ...
A. 15 April 2009: I understand you are having a rough time and it must be really hard for you, Poor dear! There is that the sympathy you needed?
... (read in full...)
Is it sex if he only goes in a little bit, but doesn't break my hymen?
Q. i know it is quiet weird to ask , regarding my age but i just have to .. i wanna know if what we are doing is -sex - , me and my bf , he slightly enters me and u know in and out all that , but not that he actually gets his peins -inside- my hymen ...
A. 15 April 2009: Are you sure your hymen is intact? I'm not a girl and not sure how you can tell but I do know that it only takes riding a bike or doing the splits to break your hymen.
Therefore even if it hurts to have sex or for him to fully penetrate, there is... (read in full...)
Pregnancy - How should I deal with this? I can't tell my mum as she will go mental.
Q. I think I may be pregnant. I had sex 2 weeks after my period and the condom broke. I'm now 12 days late for my period and will get a test tomorrow to make sure I am pregnant but my periods are very regular and i have never missed one or been more ...
A. 15 April 2009: I'm glad the website helped, I don't think your boyfriend understands the ins and outs of female reproduction too well does he.
The IUD is a non-hormonal contraceptive device that is fitted inside you and can last upto 10 years and when you want... (read in full...)
Pregnancy - How should I deal with this? I can't tell my mum as she will go mental.
Q. I think I may be pregnant. I had sex 2 weeks after my period and the condom broke. I'm now 12 days late for my period and will get a test tomorrow to make sure I am pregnant but my periods are very regular and i have never missed one or been more ...
A. 15 April 2009: So what other options did he give you? Why not try the IUD?
... (read in full...)
My ex just annoyed me with a AIM message a little while ago.
Q. My ex just annoyed me with a AIM message a little while ago. Here's the direct quote "I did whatever I had to do to make it more enjoyable......because I don't know if you know this.... but you're not working with much... I'm not trying to be funny ...
A. 15 April 2009: She's just being horrible to you, delete her from your friends and move on.... (read in full...)
Pregnancy - How should I deal with this? I can't tell my mum as she will go mental.
Q. I think I may be pregnant. I had sex 2 weeks after my period and the condom broke. I'm now 12 days late for my period and will get a test tomorrow to make sure I am pregnant but my periods are very regular and i have never missed one or been more ...
A. 15 April 2009: If you are pregnant you are going to have to tell your Mum, and Doctor.
If you weren't so anti-doctors you could have asked one for the pill or even the morning after pill, you sound like your own worst enemy.
These people are here to help you... (read in full...)
Her mom found out we are sexually active and has threatened to press charges against me.
Q. I am 17 and my girlfriend is 15. Her mom found out we are sexually active and has threatened to press charges against me. I never forced her, but can I still get in trouble....
A. 15 April 2009: I love her Mom, I hope she does press charges, technically you did force her, she is under the age of consent, therefore when you asked her to have sex and she said yes legally that means nothing because she is a child and doesn't know any better, ... (read in full...)
I wanna meet this girl!!!
Q. I walked into a record store a few weeks ago, and one of the girls working there was very beautiful, and she actually noticed a band t-shirt I was wearing and told me something about them, and then I left because I was with a friend and he was on a ...
A. 15 April 2009: Next time you see her, say hello, apologise for having to "run off" use your friend as an excuse, chat about the band, then ask her out!
It looks so simple... Do you know why? Because it is that easy!... (read in full...)
My mother in law is totally against me breastfeeding my daughter.
Q. My mother in law is totally against me breastfeeding my daughter. Since her birth she has told my husband that breastfed babies are not as smart as bottle fed babies, that our sex life will not be the same as long as I am breastfeeding, and the I ...
A. 15 April 2009: You can't educate and idiot like that. I do find it amusing though, try telling her that you are breast feeding because that is the best way to make your child gay, stand back and watch the fireworks.
Or just ban the old bat from your househol... (read in full...)
Does anyone know of any methods/strategies I can adopt to learn to love myself more?
Q. Hello again... I posted a question yesterday asking how can I learn to love myself. I didn't really get any of what I was looking for so I'm wondering if someone who has experienced life a little (over 30) can comment or advise on my situation. ...
A. 15 April 2009: You posted this yesterday :http://www.dearcupid.org/question/how-do-i-learn-to-love-myself.html. I'm sorry all us young people can't help you.
I understand that some of the aunts on here are teenagers who have just posted questions about "I love ... (read in full...)
He said he lost his phone yet he answered when I called him anonymously!
Q. Dear Cupid, I have been talking this guy almost 3 months.. we working the same place both of us said we liked each other. Also we only once a time go out. I asked him 3 times to hang out with me. He made an excuse... Now he lost his phone last ...
A. 15 April 2009: Ignore him in work, and don't go chasing him. He obviously has some reason not to talk to you outside of work, like a wife or girlfriend.... (read in full...)
Got my mistress AND my wife pregnant. Now my wife is being difficult. Shall I leave her?
Q. Last month I asked a question about how I could get my wife to forgive me after I had an affair and the other women got pregnant. Thankfully she forgave me but now things seem to be getting worse rather then better. My wife told me that she too is ...
A. 14 April 2009: You wanted her back, you got her back, but now matey, it is on her terms, if you kept you cock in your pants then you wouldn't have this problem.
Of course she isn't going to trust you, you have impregnated 2 women with in a month of each other, s... (read in full...)
Love sucks!!!
Q. I met this guy from the net... he's cute... when I first met him he told me that he will travel soon... so I said to my self that I should never get emotionally involved with him... Then things started to change... and we had sex... and he was supe...
A. 14 April 2009: There could be for a few reasons for this:
1, He does like you and genuinely is worried about what people would say as you two are different religions (a modern Romeo and Juliet)
2, He knows you like him and he can have sex with you when ev... (read in full...)
You just can't do this when you have children!!!
Q. Okay so my dad is taking my brother on holiday. He said me and my sister wouldn't enjoy it as much as my brother and he wasn't allowed extra people so we couldn't come, but now he's invited my brother's friend and his dad without telling us! I found ...
A. 14 April 2009: Ask him if he'll pay for you and your Mum to go on a girly holiday while he and the guys are off having fun.
That's what I'd do is his situation.... (read in full...)
Scared of turning 30!
Q. I am scared of turning 30++ because that's a new generation altogether. It makes me old in comparison to someone who is 28 years old and living life to the full. Help!...
A. 14 April 2009: What? Really? Don't be silly it's not a whole different generation, you are the same generation just a year older, so stop wallowing in self pity and do something you didn't do when you were 20!
I bet there is tons of stuff you wanted to do when ... (read in full...)
He didn't see the funny side and now is barely talking to me!
Q. I think I've messed things up with my boyfriend and need some advice. We've been dating for 6 months, haven't been intimate yet - just kissing, etc. He's a fairly shy guy but only at first. Last week I came to visit him in his dorm. When I got ther...
A. 14 April 2009: You have invaded his "Personal time" no guy ever wants to get caught doing that, I'm blushing at the thought of it!
He is going to be VERY embarrassed for a long time, in fact, I'm not sure if he'll ever make eye contact with you again!
From... (read in full...)
Is it sex if he only goes in a little bit, but doesn't break my hymen?
Q. i know it is quiet weird to ask , regarding my age but i just have to .. i wanna know if what we are doing is -sex - , me and my bf , he slightly enters me and u know in and out all that , but not that he actually gets his peins -inside- my hymen ...
A. 14 April 2009: It's close enough... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has cheated 6 times and I don't know how to get him to stop
Q. I just found out that my boyfriend has cheated on me yet again. This is the 6th time that this has happened and I keep taking him back. The girl called me and said that he was with her on Valentines day when he told me that he had to work. I found ...
A. 14 April 2009: He is NEVER going to stop cheating because he knows you will keep taking him back, he has all the benefits of being in a relationship with all the benefits of being single.
I hope you aren't in a sexual relationship, because if you are you may ... (read in full...)
Risk of pregnancy... please help!
Q. I had sex with my boyfriend, he used a condom so afterwards we decided to do it again so he put a new one on. We did it for a little bit he didn't cum in the condom so he took it out but then 30 minutes after we reused it. Is there any chance of ...
A. 14 April 2009: I'm not sure if you posted this earlier: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/reusing-condom-and-pregnancy-risk.html if you did you have seen my answer and if not well, have a look as it's easier than me typing it out again.... (read in full...)
Curious 14 year old girl ....
Q. hi i'm 14 and have done basically everything sexual. i was just wondering what age people have done different things eg. oral, lost virginity, anal, fantasies etc....
A. 14 April 2009: Eyeswideopen is a harsh Aunt, and sometimes even out does me in my harshness, but her advice is fair, honest and too the point, and bitching about her really isn't making you look like a mature adult.
Making a "snide comments on some peoples"... (read in full...)
Somewhere different, something different to do!
Q. its mine and my boyfriends 2 year anniversary coming up in septemper. i know its a while off yet but i really want to do something really special, out of the ordinary and different. my boyfriend is quite cultured, into historic things, educatio...
A. 14 April 2009: Have you ever been to Edinburgh? I know you are looking at September, but if you go in August the Edinburgh Festivals are on, you have the Book festival, the Fringe (Performing arts), the Royal Tattoo (Marching bands and the Army showing off)
... (read in full...)
I don't like messing about in class. Am I strange?
Q. I am 15 years old and i guess girls find me weird becasue i am so shy, I heard that is one of the biggest turn offs for women. ok I'm in class right and their are these boys and these girls who piss me off so much. One of the girls happens to be the ...
A. 14 April 2009: No it's their behaviour that is weird, but the thing is keep at your education and ignore these idiots, you'll see them on here quite often in the teen pregnancy section.
By knuckling down and getting on with your education you can get the qual... (read in full...)
Do I do him a favour and remove myself from the situation? Or see him anyway?
Q. I have recently reconnected with a friend from high school forty years ago. We have hit it off through email and on the phone and I was planning on visiting him in June. Recently his son has been in trouble and his Mom is not in good health and ...
A. 14 April 2009: If you don't go he may think that you are "put off" by his problems and to be honest your visit maybe the one good thing that's going to happen to him in some time.
Just food for thought ... (read in full...)
How can I spend the night with b/f without my parents finding out?
Q. I want to spend the night with my boyfriend. I'm 18, he's 19. His parents won't be there. His parents don't care, and they won't tell my parents. My parents know where he lives or i wouldn't have this problem. I have a friend to cover for me but I ...
A. 14 April 2009: Are you really 18? If so the two of you should book a nice hotel and do what you want! ... (read in full...)
I resisted temptation. Now how do I get over it?
Q. I am a married man with 2 kids and a good person. I have been married for 9 years and love my family. I also have a great job and CANNOT lose it. I am having a real problem at work...I have a married co worker with whom I have harmlessy flirte...
A. 14 April 2009: I respect your restraint, you have done the right thing, unfortunately as with all break ups and this technically is just that, only time can heal your wounds. ... (read in full...)
What kind of foreplay do you use before anal sex?
Q. So my boyfriend always drops hints that he wants to try anal sex. I've never done this before and am kind of nervous. I don't want him to ask I kind of want to try it on his birthday coming up. I just don't know about the foreplay of it all. I mean ...
A. 14 April 2009: Yes LOTS of Lube and fingers!... (read in full...)
He's married, threw me out like garbage but I miss him!
Q. Dear Cupid, My boyfriend left me in February, but until now I'm still in love with him. I cannot concentrate with my job anymore. I'm obsess and the problem is he is married too. Please anyone can give advise how to move on. He throw me l...
A. 14 April 2009: I can't help you get over him or feel sorry for you, but if you binned him as soon as you found out he was married you would have had less time to become so attached and also leave with the moral upper hand.
... (read in full...)
Somewhere different, something different to do!
Q. its mine and my boyfriends 2 year anniversary coming up in septemper. i know its a while off yet but i really want to do something really special, out of the ordinary and different. my boyfriend is quite cultured, into historic things, educatio...
A. 14 April 2009: I am a Scouser so I'm not having a go here, unfortunately though Liverpool isn't as cultured as it made out last year, there is still some stuff to do locally but to be honest, they seem to have mopped up the remaining Lambanas and have reverted to ... (read in full...)
Daying to reach a climax
Q. Recenttly my husband has had a problem reaching a climax during sexual intercourse. What could be the problem? Is there something I can do?...
A. 14 April 2009: I hate to say this but if your hubby is in the same age category as you (41-50) it is likely to be age and medical related rather than a younger man where it would normally be psychological.
However, most medical issues have treatments, so book ... (read in full...)
Apple cider vinegar & weight loss?
Q. hey all. i just wanted to know if apple cider vinegar really helps with weight loss? Is there anything to this, or is it just a rumor/myth? Anyone have any results good or bad using this? thanx...
A. 14 April 2009: Anything works as part of a healthy diet and LOTS of exercise!... (read in full...)
Reusing condom and pregnancy risk?
Q. Hi my bf and I had sex a day before i'm suposed to get my period today is the 14 and the 15th I need to get my period but while we had sex everything was ok but then he wasn't hard anymore so he pull out then put another condom but he wasn't hard so ...
A. 14 April 2009: Yes there is a small chance, condoms are rolled up for a reason and re-using them is not safe practice at all, go and get checked out/speak to a doctor about this ASAP!... (read in full...)
She says she doesn't love me! How can I make her love me?
Q. How can you make someone you girl frnd who is telling you she dont love you love you....
A. 14 April 2009: You CAN'T and you DON'T! If she doesn't like you like that then it's tough luck! There are no secret love spells or magic potions, and you can't use Jedi mind tricks to make some one fall in love with you.... (read in full...)
My b/f said "I want to sleep around because I feel like I'm missing out"
Q. My boyfriend is 19 an I am 17. We have been together a year and a half now and we are still going strong... so I thought. As I am 17 I can't always get in clubs. I understand my boyfriend wanting to go out with his friends in clubs. He wnet o...
A. 14 April 2009: This "Boy" is a PRAT, Dump him and tell him to go off and have fun!
He is going to hurt you in the long run and is only keeping you around as you are his security blanket, he obviously would like to pull one of these girls, but they just enjoy pl... (read in full...)
13, pregnant from first time and it was a dare
Q. Hey i have just turend 13 in december and just found out i am pregnant since I am really young and only just started my period in november i had sex in march and only slept with one lad a dont know what to do but i dont want an abortion but in a...
A. 14 April 2009: "i think it will be cool to dress them up and push them about and show them off to mates" ARE YOU SERIOUS!!!!
You have to go to a Doctor and tell your parents, they will be angry but they are educated intelligent people (which is surprisi... (read in full...)
Mid 20s guys dating late-teen girls?
Q. Guys opinions plz. What do u think about younger gals. Guys aged 25-27 about girls of 18? To u think of them as a little girl or a girl u could date? Of does it depend on how mature the girl is? ...
A. 14 April 2009: I have young recruits that are in their late teens and although they can look very nice when out of uniform and dressed up they still act like little girls, it scares me that these girls can actually get sent to Iraq and Afghanistan, so in my ... (read in full...)
Self conscious about bikini & men on the beach
Q. i going on holiday i feel very strange wearing a g-string bikini. i am feeling very self conscience but some girls arent .i saw in swim suit competition on foreign tv and she was a g-string bikini there was group of young guys were watching and the ...
A. 14 April 2009: Right all the guys on Dear cupid are obviously scared of answering bikini questions. Mostly because they are hormonal teenage boys.
I as a red blooded male in my 20s, enjoy the female form, however, g-string bikinis and that much flesh is too much... (read in full...)
Is it time to call it a day?
Q. I don't think I can put up with my wife anymore. She's driving me to misery. I've been married for 18 years and have two step daughters, both of which I adore, that are both almost married themselves. I work my backside off five days a week as a ...
A. 14 April 2009: Yes I really think it is time to leave her, the kids are grown up and have partners of their own, why stick around and be miserable for the rest of your life?... (read in full...)
Curious 14 year old girl ....
Q. hi i'm 14 and have done basically everything sexual. i was just wondering what age people have done different things eg. oral, lost virginity, anal, fantasies etc....
A. 14 April 2009: I really hope this is our resident faker, because if not you have got some serious issues! At 14 you should be worrying about if a boy fancies you not having threesomes and BDSM sessions!
... (read in full...)
Spicing up oral sex
Q. i need new ways to get turnd on any ideas please also has anyone got any ideas on spicing up the sex life or new thing that a lad can do to us girls please all ideas welcome thankyew xx...
A. 14 April 2009: Champagne, an ice cube, those sweets that crackle on your tongue, or you could just get some Durex play lube, it's flavoured, condom safe and gives you a nice tingle down there.
Don't use Tabsco or curry powder!... (read in full...)
Will a special encounter with a female help me?
Q. I am 22 years old. I am most confused. I don't have a reason to wake out of bed. I still haven't had any real special encounters. I have no experience in the dating game whatsoever. I hate to use the dreaded "V" word if you know what i mean. I ha...
A. 14 April 2009: The words VIRGIN and SEX are not bad words! The idea of going out and having sex is not really going to help here in fact it is going to add even more confusion to your already fragile mind!
I think you need to seek some professional help and once... (read in full...)
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