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... Send *rmyMedic a private message | | | *rmyMedic's profile:I'm a married, 29 year old from the UK.
I'm a sergeant in the British Army, so I deal with young people (mostly teens), who have all the usual dramas and long distance relationship issues.
My speciality is Medicine I've spent the last 12 years as an army medic, which means I have lots of experience in trauma (which isn't very helpful here), Sports therapy, travel medicine, and GU medicine (Sexual Health).
When I found out about this site, it seemed to be another way to help people out. But I am very straight talking, so please don't be too offended if you don't like my honest opinions.
If there is any advise you should take away from this site it is: Never do anything that you can't explain to a Paramedic and always practice safe sex. |
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| Latest articles: STI/STD what are they and how do you catch them?
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 April 2009: STI/STD what are they and how do you catch them? An STI is a sexually transmitted infection this is the "in vogue" name for what used to be called an Sexually transmitted disease (STD) This can range from pubic lice to AIDS and Hepatitis with m...
Why don't boys reply to my texts?
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 April 2009: Why don't boys reply to my texts? This is a commonly asked question at dear cupid and I understand it really isn't as important as a domestic violence question, but I feel it needs answering. Now this is just a personal opinion and if any guys ...
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Will a special encounter with a female help me?
Q. I am 22 years old. I am most confused. I don't have a reason to wake out of bed. I still haven't had any real special encounters. I have no experience in the dating game whatsoever. I hate to use the dreaded "V" word if you know what i mean. I ha...
A. 14 April 2009: The words VIRGIN and SEX are not bad words! The idea of going out and having sex is not really going to help here in fact it is going to add even more confusion to your already fragile mind!
I think you need to seek some professional help and once... (read in full...)
Why the sudden change in using protection?
Q. Why after 4 months of (2 times a week) having unprotected sex with my married "boyfriend" does he want to START to use condoms? ( I can't get pregnant either)...
A. 14 April 2009: Emily is right as usual and has beaten me off the mark AGAIN!
You are having an affair with a married man, of course there is going to be no trust and a high chance of STIs what is worrying is that this IDIOT man hasn't taken precautions earlier!... (read in full...)
Is this a sin?
Q. Im so embarassed because I recently started to masturbate and need help. I've read pages on the internet saying how it isnt a sin and some saying that it is. So idk what to do?! I want to but I feel guilty and weird like I'm sinning really bad. ahhh ...
A. 14 April 2009: Don't believe everything you read on the internet or in 2000 year old fairy tales either!
Do what makes you feel good, respect others and treat people the way you would like to be treated yourself, and always try to make a difference.... Isn't th... (read in full...)
Worried army wife!
Q. My boyfriend is in the army and was recently deployed. He went at the begining of February. It is the first time he has been away since we have been together and when he first left he called me regularly every few days, but I have not heard from ...
A. 13 April 2009: sorry I sent that twice... (read in full...)
Worried army wife!
Q. My boyfriend is in the army and was recently deployed. He went at the begining of February. It is the first time he has been away since we have been together and when he first left he called me regularly every few days, but I have not heard from ...
A. 13 April 2009: This is totally normal, operations are busy times and often we are stuck at a little out post with no email, no sat phone and blueys get taken out on a helicopter once every couple of weeks. The other issue is OPSEC (Operational Security) if a big ... (read in full...)
Worried army wife!
Q. My boyfriend is in the army and was recently deployed. He went at the begining of February. It is the first time he has been away since we have been together and when he first left he called me regularly every few days, but I have not heard from ...
A. 13 April 2009: This is totally normal, operations are busy times and often we are stuck at a little out post with no email, no sat phone and blueys get taken out on a helicopter once every couple of weeks. The other issue is OPSEC (Operational Security) if a big ... (read in full...)
I feel like a sinner and I don't know what to do!
Q. I feel so so dirty! A man on here helped me with one of my problems and we got chatting and he said he'd help me with any other problems. Anyway he started talking sexually and I did too cos I was so unbelievably horny but now I feel so dirty and ...
A. 13 April 2009: OK if you have a Dear Cupid Account you got sent an Email from Andrew (Dear Cupid guy) It will be your very first email in your in box, I suggest you email him and tell him what happened and he can take the appropriate steps in removing this FAKE ... (read in full...)
Pull out and pray!!!!
Q. Ok I had sex with my girlfriend we only had sex with out a condom for like 3 or 4 minutes then we used one. What's you opinion on the chances of her getting pregnant? Her period was 3 days before this. ...
A. 13 April 2009: I hope you have a good job and can afford nappies, a nursery, cot, pram, clothes etc...
Because what you have done here is VERY stupid! As Satin says she has a 50/50 chance and the morning after pill is your get out of jail free card (or avoid ve... (read in full...)
Why is my life so miserable?
Q. I just can't handle it any more! It seems like there just seems to be dozens of more crap by the day! My life has always been complicated and hard. I hardly know any of my family including my brother who to be honest has broken my heart and the rest ...
A. 13 April 2009: This to me seems like a huge problem and not like the usual trivial stuff we get here, in fact I feel completely under qualified to help you out with such a big question.
Have you looked for professional help? Can you talk to any friends or famil... (read in full...)
Do Virgo men take an awfully long time to open up and trust women?
Q. I have been in love with a man since last summer. I made my feelings towards him fairly clear but at Christmas he said he could only offer me friendship, despite the fact that he was sending messages to indicate he wanted more. I decided I would de...
A. 13 April 2009: I am a Virgo man, and I think you need to think much less about Star Signs and more about individual personalities.
Maybe he doesn't want a relationship with you because you focus on things like this, maybe his idea of a first date isn't palm rea... (read in full...)
I like her but I am not attracted to her? Am I trying to change her?
Q. Okay so I'm seeing this girl. She's not usually what I would go for.. Like she's really cute. Maybe a 5.9/10 on my scale. I usually date 7/10's and up... I'm involved with this girl because I'm looking for someone to share my time with and so...
A. 13 April 2009: I tell you what, I think you have found a really good catch here but as you are so arrogant, maybe you should let her go and find a guy who isn't so stuck up his own arse and find yourself a 10/10!
She deserves better than some idiot who is going... (read in full...)
No foreplay and no condoms!
Q. No foreplay and no condoms! I have just started to sleep with my guy - but he seems reluctant to give me any foreplay! Also he says that when we do have sex he doesn't like using condoms!! - I am confused with what to do - as I love him but am unsur...
A. 13 April 2009: I think you should stop dating teenagers ;-)
But honestly if he doesn't know what he's doing, immature and selfish you should dump him, how many other women has he not used protection with.
Seriously do not let his penis anywhere near yo... (read in full...)
My bf is 7 yrs older than me and I know it's illegal for us to date. Is he worth it?? Please read xxx
Q. i am currently going out with a 21 year old and im only 13 (he was 20 when we started seeing eachother) the thing is he hasnt pressured me into anything and ive never felt this way before. i know about his past and everything ive spoken 2 his cous...
A. 13 April 2009: In my Unit the Safety of our Cadets comes first and foremost I would give a toss if the Guy had a VC.
I'll tell you how to report it go to this website: http://www.police.uk/forces.htm find your local area police force and it will have an area on ... (read in full...)
My bf is 7 yrs older than me and I know it's illegal for us to date. Is he worth it?? Please read xxx
Q. i am currently going out with a 21 year old and im only 13 (he was 20 when we started seeing eachother) the thing is he hasnt pressured me into anything and ive never felt this way before. i know about his past and everything ive spoken 2 his cous...
A. 13 April 2009: Ok this is my last reply: You obviously don't have the courage to know right from wrong and you are more than happy with the way this Man has behaved! Please either report it or don't but posting "but it is so hard" and "you don't understand" here ... (read in full...)
What is a "courtesan"?
Q. what is a courtesan?...
A. 13 April 2009: A Kings Whore - Back in the day of course, Royalty nowadays would never have affairs or that kind of thing as they are all very respectable!... (read in full...)
Has anyone tried Lybrel? Experiences?
Q. Hello, I'm on a birth control (Lybrel) with the only purpose to end my periods. That is the function of Lybrel. However, I've been taking the pill for almost four months now and I've been bleeding/staining EVERYDAY eversince. I want to know if anyon...
A. 13 April 2009: This sounds like you are on a Progesterone based pill and this is a common side effect, you may want to go back and see you Doctor and try something else. Sorry I can't be more help.... (read in full...)
My bf is 7 yrs older than me and I know it's illegal for us to date. Is he worth it?? Please read xxx
Q. i am currently going out with a 21 year old and im only 13 (he was 20 when we started seeing eachother) the thing is he hasnt pressured me into anything and ive never felt this way before. i know about his past and everything ive spoken 2 his cous...
A. 13 April 2009: Well if the Cadet Officers are going to close ranks on you, so to speak, go to the Civilian Police and trust me he will end up in Civvi Prison, as MCTC Colechester is saved for people who go AWOL and steal tanks not Rape teenagers.... (read in full...)
My bf is 7 yrs older than me and I know it's illegal for us to date. Is he worth it?? Please read xxx
Q. i am currently going out with a 21 year old and im only 13 (he was 20 when we started seeing eachother) the thing is he hasnt pressured me into anything and ive never felt this way before. i know about his past and everything ive spoken 2 his cous...
A. 13 April 2009: Utter Rubbish it is as simple as that and I think it will be much safer in prison than in Afghanistan!
He used you because it was easy to use you as you are a child! This Man, should not be allowed to work with cadets or recruits, and certainl... (read in full...)
Are all guys like to have skinny girlfriends?
Q. just looking for body advice.. Im 61kgs and probably around 165 cms maybe a bit taller. Im not fat, im curvy. I like my bum i like that i have one. The only things i dont really like is my boobs, there a bit small but im not that phased. The th...
A. 13 April 2009: Your boyfriend or I hope soon to be ex-boyfriend is a prick! Your height and weight seem perfectly normal to me.
I think Emily is right here I think it's time you started dishing out the Man hood put downs and see how he likes it.
Overall... (read in full...)
My bf is 7 yrs older than me and I know it's illegal for us to date. Is he worth it?? Please read xxx
Q. i am currently going out with a 21 year old and im only 13 (he was 20 when we started seeing eachother) the thing is he hasnt pressured me into anything and ive never felt this way before. i know about his past and everything ive spoken 2 his cous...
A. 13 April 2009: As I Cadet Officer, as well as a regular Soldier I think, what he has done is totally wrong and I urge you to report him straight away!
This is not appropriate behaviour and if he has done this with you he will prey on other young people and that... (read in full...)
I'm 30 shes 40, and I want to tell her how I feel
Q. I have been friends with an older lady, she is 39 and i am 30. We met at salsa classes and ever since the moment i saw her we have been talking. Recently, in the past two weeks we have exchanged numbers and started to text each other. She is ...
A. 13 April 2009: Well, if you enjoy spending time with her and feel you can move on and not get clingy teenager about it, stay friends.
The only time this could become an issue is if either of you get in to a relationship.... (read in full...)
Ideas for our one month anniversary please!
Q. hi guys me and my new boyfriend has been together for about a month and i am looking to celebrate a one month anniversary with him, i dont have any clue what to do for him or what to buy for him can u plz help with some advice. thank you...
A. 13 April 2009: An engagement ring? Seriously it's only one month, maybe at 3 or 6 months but is it really that much of an achievement to have stayed together for ONE whole month 4 weeks of hard work?
If you MUST do anything buy or make him dinner, don't do ANYTH... (read in full...)
Pulled out during orgasm and ruined it for me. Was I wrong for getting mad?
Q. I'm not sure I was totally in the wrong in this situation, so please just let me know what you think. Yesterday my boyfriend and I were having sex in the morning and right when I was orgasming, he pulled out and ruined it all for me. It felt like...
A. 13 April 2009: oh lilpixie just pointed out something there, never mind the pull out method we all know that doesn't work, but why wasn't he wearing a condom?... (read in full...)
14, in love, and both of us are ready for sex. But I'm scared of the pain.
Q. OK, I don't know what to do... I started a relationship with this guy I've known for years about a month ago. So far, we've only had oral and manual sex. It's clear he wants to go all the way, but he's reassured me that he won't do anything I'm ...
A. 13 April 2009: OK then the word paedophile springs to mind! ... (read in full...)
Pulled out during orgasm and ruined it for me. Was I wrong for getting mad?
Q. I'm not sure I was totally in the wrong in this situation, so please just let me know what you think. Yesterday my boyfriend and I were having sex in the morning and right when I was orgasming, he pulled out and ruined it all for me. It felt like...
A. 13 April 2009: You need to educate this silly boy on what women like because his sex education has come from cheap porn and what will make it worse is he will probably brag about it to his childish mates.
In fact don't educate him, DUMP him right now, what an ... (read in full...)
14, in love, and both of us are ready for sex. But I'm scared of the pain.
Q. OK, I don't know what to do... I started a relationship with this guy I've known for years about a month ago. So far, we've only had oral and manual sex. It's clear he wants to go all the way, but he's reassured me that he won't do anything I'm ...
A. 13 April 2009: You're 13-15 and already had oral sex with him! After only a month of dating! You need to slow down sweetheart, otherwise you will make a right name for yourself.
If you really are set on loosing your virginity, because you are disappoi... (read in full...)
My guy made me feel like I did something wrong. Did I?
Q. Saturday night I went out with my boyfriend and 4other people he knows(1 being a girl). It was suppose 2b me and my guy at 1st but his man called wanting to go to the movies bringing along his girl. We get in the car and the plans have change. The ...
A. 13 April 2009: You got drunk so what. If I acted the way your "man" does I think my wife would be drunk too!
This man showed you no respect at all and should not have shoved you no matter how drunk and embarrassing you were.
He showed more disrespect to yo... (read in full...)
He didn't come inside me, but yes, it was penetrative sex. Could I be pregnant?
Q. Hi there, this is a question about the mini-pill Cerazette. I missed taking my pill for 3 consecutive days (weekend break and I forgot to take it with me, argh), then had been taking my pill for 3 days after I got back before having unprotec...
A. 13 April 2009: OH YES you really could be pregnant, what you did was VERY silly indeed! If this happened less than 72 hours ago I strongly suggest that you go and get the Emergency Contraceptive Pill (morning after pill)
If it is more than 72 hours, go and see ... (read in full...)
I did what I had to do on facebook. What's next for me?
Q. There is this girl I like, this is the same girl from my other question, and she's been avoiding me a lot. I tried to convince myself that I could get over her, but I cant. She was my first love and I've liked her for a long time. Well I did some...
A. 13 April 2009: Oh sorry I was under the impression that your friend didn't know you sent a message pretending to be him! But if he's in on this too then everything is fine..... No wait a minute, it's not and when will you obsessive teenagers ever learn that by ... (read in full...)
Addicted to the internet!
Q. This has nothing to do with love or relationships, but I think i'm addicted to the internet!! I sound like a sad loser that doesn't have a social life, but i'm simply on it more because there's nothing to do, and I have no money. Especially bore...
A. 13 April 2009: It's just one of those things the internet is addictive, I mean look at us here on dear cupid on a lovely bank holiday weekend!
I really think it's just one of those things where you have to shut down your computer, and get out even if it's jus... (read in full...)
I'm 30 shes 40, and I want to tell her how I feel
Q. I have been friends with an older lady, she is 39 and i am 30. We met at salsa classes and ever since the moment i saw her we have been talking. Recently, in the past two weeks we have exchanged numbers and started to text each other. She is ...
A. 13 April 2009: Yes, just tell her, even if she doesn't see you that way, you are both old enough to be adults about the situation.
I'm sure any lady would take it as a compliment if a chap 10 years her junior said he fancied her!... (read in full...)
Follow up: In love with 2 teachers.
Q. http://www.dearcupid.org/question/my-gosh---struggling-under-the-pressure.html Please please please help! I am completely head over heels in love with 2 of my teachers! I have no idea what to do....these feelings are so strong. Can someone help...
A. 13 April 2009: You are NOT in love, you have a CRUSH on 2 teachers and it will pass with time, what you are experiencing is perfectly normal for someone of your age... (read in full...)
I think I'm in love with my best friend! But, we are both females!
Q. Iam a female i have a good friend female we have kissed on lots of occasions my feelings are getting strong for her lately we have a few fights. We went to Thailand together and things happened there. I think im in love with her I don't want to be a ...
A. 13 April 2009: Just because you are in-love with her doesn't mean you have to pin a big badge saying "I'm a Lezzer" on your chest, start wearing dungarees and cut your hair short!
What is it about people wanting to pin labels on to their sexuality? You are not ... (read in full...)
I really like him. Should I stop?
Q. There is this guy who have seen a couple of times and he asked me out, i said no because i didn't know him very well but now i have grew strong feelings for him and i have began to like him. i have asked him out and he said 'dunno' and them people ...
A. 13 April 2009: Ask him again, and if he says "Dunno" then tell him that is not good enough, and to give you a proper answer.
That will show him you are not shy and you know what you want.... (read in full...)
I just want him to be my best friend
Q. my closest and best friend is in love with me but i dont feel the same yet i don't want to see him sad. i just want him to be my friend. am so confused...
A. 13 April 2009: Boys are a nightmare for falling in love with their "best" female friends. The only thing you can do is tell him that you don't feel that way about him.
It will hurt him for a while, but he will get over it in time. What you must NOT do is give ... (read in full...)
My husband lost interest in sex because I look too supermodel-girly!
Q. For the past 3 weeks my husband's been refusing to have sex with me. Everything I've tried didn't work - sexy lingerie, a romantic night in, massages from me, roleplay, wearing sexy bikinis - it all failed. He just showed no interest at all....
A. 13 April 2009: This is something I have noticed with guys who spend too much time sculpting their bodies, they feel that nobody is beautiful unless they look like the incredible hulk!
Firstly check he isn't taking steroids, as these can reduce his sex drive ma... (read in full...)
Good looking guy!. Every one assumes he's got a girlfriend
Q. Can a god looking friendly guy have so many female friends but not girlfriend yet?i like this guy but i don,t he like me.he has ginger hair and blue eyes tall and every one thinks he got a girlfriend when he does not ...
A. 13 April 2009: Of course he doesn't have to have a girlfriend, firstly he may not see himself as good looking so doesn't realise anyone fancies him or has the confidence to ask anyone out.
Or he has plenty of confidence and is enjoying being single, or he just ... (read in full...)
What is the suitable age to get into a relationship?
Q. what's the suitable age to get into a relationship?? I mean the time when " u should b in a relationship" without anyone feeling strange or talking bad about you. (such as parents n relatives) Pls do give sincere advices and I would like to ...
A. 13 April 2009: The suitable age is when you feel ready to deal with the all the ups and downs, the mix of emotions, and being able to deal with grown up issues such as STIs and Pregnancy.
... (read in full...)
Is my girlfriend being unfair by not forgiving me my mistake?
Q. I've been in a relationship for eight months. I love my girlfriend but, alas, I've made some stupid mistakes. Considering that our relationship is long-distance, it's been difficult on me as I'm a guy and had recently lost my virginity (to my...
A. 13 April 2009: I would take this as an opportunity to run! She doesn't sound like a nice Christian girl to me, I thought the whole point of that religion was forgiveness?
If she can't forgive you and you are now telling her that you have forgiven her sins, an... (read in full...)
My bf takes forever to cum
Q. It is really hard to make my bf cum.He can only come if he is on bottom.i need help.Is there anything he can take that will make him come easer...
A. 13 April 2009: Pop a finger in his bum, not many guys like this but the stimulation on his prostate will make him cum whether he wants to or not!
(you may want to talk to him about this first otherwise he may get quite upset with you)... (read in full...)
Why Is My Former Teacher Behaving So Strangely?
Q. Why Is My Former Teacher Behaving So Strangely? I Contacted My Former High School Teacher After 5 Years To Catch Up. He Initially Answered My Email And Said That He'd Love To See Me Again But Then when I wrote back to him to set up a date and time ...
A. 13 April 2009: He wrote back and then got cold feet, he was probably scared in case his wife or girlfriend found out.... (read in full...)
I did what I had to do on facebook. What's next for me?
Q. There is this girl I like, this is the same girl from my other question, and she's been avoiding me a lot. I tried to convince myself that I could get over her, but I cant. She was my first love and I've liked her for a long time. Well I did some...
A. 13 April 2009: You move on! You have officially become a stalker and that IS weird!
Please don't ever do anything like that again, it was a massive breach of privacy and trust and if I was your friend and found out you hand been using my facebook to stalk a ... (read in full...)
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