I think I really insulted my bf....how should I fix this?
Q. A few days ago my bf came home from work and he came into our bedroom where I was reading/studying and to get my attention he took his penis out and wanted me to play with it....I told him to go away bc I was busy. When he came back to bed a few ...
A. 29 June 2019: Don't you think it's time to walk away?
He is trying to manipulate you into doing things HE wants to do, regardless of whether YOU want to or not. As for you still cooking and cleaning, well.. I'm sure he appreciate the "free" maid service.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend treats me like glass since I'm a virgin
Q. Hi y’all. I’ve taken some of your advice to put myself out there and date and get to know a guy. He’s actually a classmate of mine and my friends set us up. We’ve been dating for for a while but he treats me differently. The conversation of sex c...
A. 7 June 2019: Yes, if his is so focused on your being a virgin that he can't see you as a person too - just a person with no sexual experience, then he is not for you.
I will still say when you DO meet someone, go slow. Doesn't matter if you are a virgin o... (read in full...)
Crushing on the Walmart guy!
Q. I'm going to try and keep this as short as possible! I have been single for almost 4 years. I haven't dated anyone I just haven't found anyone that I'm interested in until now. A few months ago I seen this guy that works at my local Walmar...
A. 7 June 2019: Good for you!
Just GO slow. GET to actually know him before jumping in with both feet.
Good luck.... (read in full...)
I don’t trust him, he’s a player! Why does he not want me to move on? What to do?
Q. I like this guy from almost 1 year now I had a crush on him even though I knew he had a girlfriend Then abruptly out of the blue he started flirting with me and blushing. his friends tease me even teachers tease me by his name once I saw him with ...
A. 6 June 2019: He sounds like an idiot. Immature idiot.
I hope you know you CAN do better than that.
While it might have been fun for a while to flirt with him, you HAVE to realize that he HAS a GF, and even if that ended and YOU started dating him, HE w... (read in full...)
My boyfriend treats me like glass since I'm a virgin
Q. Hi y’all. I’ve taken some of your advice to put myself out there and date and get to know a guy. He’s actually a classmate of mine and my friends set us up. We’ve been dating for for a while but he treats me differently. The conversation of sex c...
A. 6 June 2019: I think your friends speaks from experience. And I think he IS doing the "right" thing is going slow with you. That isn't JUST for your sake, it's for his own too.
But if I were you I'd tell him to stop TREATING you like you are made of glass.
... (read in full...)
Is it possible for beauty to love the beast?
Q. I am posting this question partly out of my own insecurities but also because some people are talking behind my back. I am a virgin who is in his first relationship. My girlfriend is a friend from school who got divorced not too long ago. I used to ...
A. 5 June 2019: I think you make her feel safe, respected and perhaps loved. Something she might NOT have felt with the other men.
EACH relationship is different.
IF she was JUST with you for your money, I think you would know by now. Do you pay her bills, t... (read in full...)
We broke up and I just want to settle things so I can move on with my life
Q. Dear cupid! My boyfriend of almost two years dumped me because he said he couldn't be himself with me anymore. We share a bank account together,we bought a big purchase together such as a TV and we share a phone bill where hes the authorized user. ...
A. 4 June 2019: Take yourself off the phone bill and either switch provider or get your own account. If you are in the US plenty of phone companies will pay the expense of you switching.
Open your OWN bank account ( or IF he is on yours, take him off) and make... (read in full...)
Crushing on the Walmart guy!
Q. I'm going to try and keep this as short as possible! I have been single for almost 4 years. I haven't dated anyone I just haven't found anyone that I'm interested in until now. A few months ago I seen this guy that works at my local Walmar...
A. 4 June 2019: First I think you need to reel in that whole "he is the one" fantasy.
He could have a GF. Or a wife. Or be a total asshat.
HE IS A COMPLETE STRANGER.
Why not just say:" Hi, how are you?" next time you see him. Kids say the darndest thing, ... (read in full...)
Do I let people set me up for dates?
Q. So its been quite sometime since I left DC.And I really wish I came back with some better news, but hey life is life and it doesnt always go your way. So on with it. Its been over 6 months since I said to myself that I wanted to start dating aga...
A. 4 June 2019: Thanks for the update, Sam :)
I think it was good that you ASKED her yourself. Because you ARE an adult and should be able to "pick and choose" who you want to date.
I think if you two get along it might be nice to ask her out. IF you think she... (read in full...)
My fiance's boss seems to be crossing normal professional limits. How can she draw the line without antagonizing him?
Q. Hello. I have a situation. My fiance (gf of 7 years, 2 years LDR) got a new job in a multinational company a month ago which was a dream come true for her. Her job profile, work culture, everything is perfect. Here's where the problem arises. Firs...
A. 3 June 2019: Does your GF have a hard time setting boundaries with people? (not just men?)
If she does, maybe she isn't looking to "string" him along (or you) but she just isn't assertive enough to say: " hey, I can't hang out after work" or "I don't mix busi... (read in full...)
My girlfriend has no interest in sex. How can I ignite a sexual spark in her? ...
Q. So me and my girlfriend have been going out for about four months. We're both virgins but she isn't interested in sex at all. She says she feels no sexual desires at all which is frustrating because she's always leaving me with blue balls. She says ...
A. 3 June 2019: OP,
1. it's ONLY been 4 months of dating, maybe she isn't REALLY ready for full on sex.
2. She doesn't OWE you to "finish" you off.
3. If you two spend time on her bed and that causes you to get an erection and her to NOT want to deal with... (read in full...)
We had amazing dates, but now he’s left me confused!
Q. Hi everyone I am a single mum to two small children aged 1 and 5. About 4 weeks ago a met a single dad with 3 children online. We spoke daily and instantly hit it off so set a date for about 5 days later. He called me the day before as wanted...
A. 2 June 2019: I agree DO NOT tell him you miss him.
He will (or can) take that as you being a clingy person.
Keep ANY responses light and cheery (even if you don't exactly FEEL that way). And KEEP them SHORT. No long texts, just short and sweet.
AND DO... (read in full...)
Thought she was my friend, is it me or has she changed?
Q. I’m not sure where to start as I’m in complete shock at the moment. a while ago I joined a dating site to find myself a girlfriend as I’ve been single for nearly a year. came across a female who I liked and seem to get on well with each other. it ...
A. 2 June 2019: OP, have you tried looking for someone to date who are around YOUR age and not.. much younger?
And don't fall for the "we can be friends" or " let's be friends and see if we want to date later". People generally know when they meet someone ... (read in full...)
She thanked me, said she had a good time but also said she is not looking for anything serious
Q. I matched and got talking to a girl on a online dating app.. Few messages later went out for dinner. Holy smokes she is stunning. I don’t have a clue how it went. She kept thanking me and saying she had a good time. But also said she is not looking ...
A. 2 June 2019: It happens, OP
Sometimes you won't click with the woman you have set a date up with, sometimes SHE won't click with you. And sometimes the CHEMISTRY is right but you have nothing in common... etc. THAT is why people go on dates. To see if they are... (read in full...)
Now that I am pregnant my husband is having difficulty with sex
Q. Hello, My husband and I are expecting a baby in November. He has two children already but this is our first together. The problem is that since we found out about the baby (it was planned) he has been experiencing erection problems. He has recently...
A. 2 June 2019: First congrats on the pregnancy!
Some men also have a hard time having sex during a pregnancy because they think it can harm the baby.
BUT I think he already told you, he is stressed. So my advice would be to dial down the sexy time for now.
... (read in full...)
I'm worried that my new job is danger because of 2 conniving co-workers
Q. Hey guys so I just got a new job and at my job there are two girls one of them who is my supervisor who plot against people and get them fired one of the girls has the hugest crush and I think shes sleeping with the CEO of the company and I think a ...
A. 2 June 2019: First off, how much of your post is presumptions ans speculations and how much could you actually PROVE if you had to?
" I think shes sleeping with the CEO "
"I think a lot of her jealousy towards other woman in the company"
Those are specu... (read in full...)
I feel my husband is using me financially
Q. I don’t have anyone I can ask for advice that won’t be bias in either my favor or my husband’s favor. This might be long, but I’ll try to condense this. My husband and I are both in our late 20s. We have a daughter together. We’ve been together a ...
A. 1 June 2019: If you plan on STAYING married you need to do a few things,
1. SET a budget and stick to it. SHOW him what his share is and what needs paid, and what you HAVE to cut to stay above water.
2. CUT all extras that you don't REALLY need. That will ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is illegally in my country, wants to marry me so he can stay on and is planning our wedding which is going to happen in a week!
Q. Hi everyone, I have a situation. I have been with my boyfriend for a year and he does everything for me and my kids. We first met online, he had come from a far country to visit me and he decided not to go back to his country. So now he has ...
A. 1 June 2019: Nope, don't do it.
If you went through this ONCE before, you know this isn't the right thing to do...
You have to tell him, IF he TRULY wants to marry you and BE with you this has to be done the RIGHT way.
Look into a fiance visa - for that... (read in full...)
We had amazing dates, but now he’s left me confused!
Q. Hi everyone I am a single mum to two small children aged 1 and 5. About 4 weeks ago a met a single dad with 3 children online. We spoke daily and instantly hit it off so set a date for about 5 days later. He called me the day before as wanted...
A. 31 May 2019: I think you moved WAY too fast. And HE realized that before you did. I know you are OK with having had sex on the first date, but that ALSO can be why this didn't work out. Because you BOTH rushed things. Instead of taking a GOOD long while GETTING ... (read in full...)
Why do men stare and smile but never acknowledge
Q. Why is it that some men stare but never speak? I work with a lot of men at a fairly large grocery chain. I was doing my grocery shopping one night after work and smiled almost instinctively at an extremely attractive man. Later that night I ran...
A. 31 May 2019: He knows he has made you "interested" now he is just playing the game of pulling away but not totally to see if you follow... When you DIDN'T give him the goo-goo eyes but looked engrossed in your phone he got annoyed because YOU didn't play HIS ... (read in full...)
Thought she was my friend, is it me or has she changed?
Q. I’m not sure where to start as I’m in complete shock at the moment. a while ago I joined a dating site to find myself a girlfriend as I’ve been single for nearly a year. came across a female who I liked and seem to get on well with each other. it ...
A. 31 May 2019: I don't think it was her BF.
Is she is your age, she is OLD enough to decide who she wants to keep in touch with, be friends with etc. Her BF isn't her "gate-keeper" - and IF he is... well, nothing you can do about that EITHER.
She told you ... (read in full...)
She thanked me, said she had a good time but also said she is not looking for anything serious
Q. I matched and got talking to a girl on a online dating app.. Few messages later went out for dinner. Holy smokes she is stunning. I don’t have a clue how it went. She kept thanking me and saying she had a good time. But also said she is not looking ...
A. 31 May 2019: Has being a gentlemen cost me here?
Nope.
She just isn't interested in dating YOU.
So delete her number and TRY again with someone else.
Don't text her. ... (read in full...)
I'm married and am infatuated with a man who is also in a relationship
Q. I am a married woman and I have developed an infatuation with another man. He is in a relationship too. I don’t know a great deal about him but I know he too fancies me. He has made it clear and has asked me out. I have never been unfaithful ...
A. 29 May 2019: I have to say Code Warrior nailed it,
You are NOT getting sex and intimacy at home so when some guy OUTSIDE of your marriage throw you some "come hither" vibes it dials your libido up to 100.
Whether he is "serious" or not, it's kind of moo... (read in full...)
What happened to keeping in touch and friendship?
Q. http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-dont-understand-the-change-in-his-behaviour.html Here’s the question that I asked and I followed the advice and didn’t contact him again . After a week or so, I just sent a very friendly text on his story on Ins...
A. 29 May 2019: Why don't you just decide whether you feel his TREATMENT of you is OK or not and act accordingly?
As in, if you don't like it.. BLOCK him, unfollow him and TRULY cut the cord.
No one here can read his mind.
You probably didn't do anyth... (read in full...)
Can men get so used to porn that they think of the porn stars as better than normal women?
Q. Is it possible that a man who has been single for a long time and used porn as his main sexual release can become infactuated with porn women and think of them as being better than or above ordinary women. I ask because the man o have met seems to ...
A. 29 May 2019: Because for some fantasy is preferable to reality.
It's not so much that these women ARE better, but he WANTS to think they are because that makes HIM better too.
With the whole social media celebrities - think "Instagram models" - "Influ... (read in full...)
I've wasted my prime is it too late to get over it?
Q. This is a petty question I'm sure but it's something that holds me back I will try to keep it short. I've had depression off and on since 15 but hit a hard spell at 21 after a relationship knocked me back because of it my life has been frozen....
A. 29 May 2019: Living with constant regret over something you DIDN'T do is like taking poison is tiny doses and being upset that you feel ill.
LET go of the regret, and MAKE plans for making POSITIVE changes to your life NOW, not wait around for life to HAPPEN t... (read in full...)
What are some Acts of Service that don't involve a ton of chores or cleaning?
Q. My husband's love language is Acts of Service. He's an ambitious man with a high stress job, and has to bring work home a couple nights as week. I try to use this time to do some of his/our chores so he doesn't have to do them. I also like to make ...
A. 29 May 2019: Hire a maid.
THAT would be a lovely act of service in my book. That way HE doesn't HAVE to worry about his HIGH stress job and also pleasing you by doing some of the chores.
Or order take out. Then NEITHER of you have to cook.
I have ... (read in full...)
Seeing my ex at works makes it hard for me to make a decision about my job future. Do I follow my heart or my head?
Q. I've posted on here a few times about a relationship I had with my colleague that went south to say the least! We currently only speak with each other about work (barely even that). I basically see him and see red! I didn't behave well after the ...
A. 29 May 2019: I'd go for the job at the sister school.
For two reasons;
1. you get away from seeing him on a daily basis.
2. it also leave you the opportunity to come back when you have ACTUALLY moved on and can handle being around him and JUST NOT ... (read in full...)
Are there any laws on verbal abuse?
Q. Hello there, What is your view on verbal abuse? I was having a drink with a kinda newish 'friend' (a friend of my estranged brothers - who are both violent narcissists but no-one knows my past with them) and he suddenly turned the subject into...
A. 29 May 2019: So VERY passive aggressive, OP
Being yelled at and feeling intimidated by someone IS never pleasant and is probably scary for some, NO ONE is saying that HIS ACTIONS was EVER OK.
In BOTH situations it was possible for you to extricate yoursel... (read in full...)
We've never met I'm in the US she's in France. Is there any point in continuing this?
Q. So a couple months ago I noticed a beautiful woman followed me on Twitter. I followed her back and we started exchanging DM's on twitter. Turns out she lives in France. I live in Nevada. But we did click. Our interests lined up in many ways (it...
A. 29 May 2019: Some times the saying "It's a small World" is actually true, other times, it's just a NICE fantasy.
You don't know her, she doesn't know you. Sure... she follows you on social media, but let's face it... that is your PUBLIC facade. THAT is what ... (read in full...)
I think I really insulted my bf....how should I fix this?
Q. A few days ago my bf came home from work and he came into our bedroom where I was reading/studying and to get my attention he took his penis out and wanted me to play with it....I told him to go away bc I was busy. When he came back to bed a few ...
A. 28 May 2019: Well, I think YOU need to consider what you REALLY want here.
And if it is FRIENDSHIP, then you NEED to move out and see if HE wants friendship too. The whole wanting a relationship with him but without a MUTUALLY beneficial sex-life and respect ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend overreacts at the smallest of things and is getting too much to bear
Q. Hello and thank you So I must say I'm annoyed with my boyfriends attitude little things set him off. He over reacts to minor things and its definitely getting to be too much . As an example for the last month he says he has been outsid...
A. 28 May 2019: If you were to answer this question yourself, why do you think he does this?
Does it generally STOP you from asking further questions?
Does he (generally) lie about things?
Is he (generally) defensive about things?
Do YOU ever accuse him ... (read in full...)
What is the average age for first time sex for a girl?
Q. how old is the average age when a girl has sex for the first time?? ...
A. 28 May 2019: A quick google search says:
"The Kinsey Institute 2017 data from the CDC, which says the average age of “first intercourse” in men is 16.8, while women, on average, have intercourse for the first time at 17.2."
However, what the AVERAGE girl... (read in full...)
A troubling situation is arising my dad is becoming a creep
Q. Firstly,my dad has never abused or molested me growing up and he was actually very protective of me and my sister. Now even as an adult my father will do anything for me and he has expressed that I'm his favorite child. I never felt weird around my ...
A. 28 May 2019: I agree with N91, it needs to stop. ASAP.
And I would talk to him first (however, like N91 mentioned if that is too hard for you, start with mom).
He needs to look at his own behavior and realize that it's totally UNACCEPTABLE and INAPPROPRIAT... (read in full...)
Can two women have professional chemistry?
Q. This is party a follow up question. I made a post a couple of weeks ago about a female client who I thought was flirting with me. I’m rubbish at working this stuff out so needed advice! I’ve just announced that I’m leaving my job so I called h...
A. 28 May 2019: I think "professional chemistry" is just another term for being on the same wave-length or just a good fit. Doesn't MEAN there HAS to be anything romantic, except for subtle connotations which are SO hard to misunderstand.
Some people (both me... (read in full...)
I know my ex still loves me but this isn't going to go anywhere
Q. long story short Friend of many years became boyfriend. Broke up citing family not agreeing for marriage on his side. At first i thought we are maintaining friendship while he called once in a while. But now it seems like he finds reasons to keep ...
A. 28 May 2019: I think he knows there is no future with you, BUT he doesn't WANT you to find someone else. At least not BEFORE he finds a suitable match.
My advice? Let him know that as much as you care for him as a friend you have to let him go. Because ... (read in full...)
I want to date but don't even know how to get someone interested in me
Q. So I've gotten myself into probably common predicament and so far I haven't been doing well to get out of it. I'm twenty-six now, finished school last year, have a job but trying to break into a career and eventually be moved out of my parents house ...
A. 27 May 2019: OP, you don't "MAKE" people interested in you. You look for common ground.
It can be hobbies, interests, work, religion, lifestyle etc. that you share in common.
And you find a way to get to know the other person as THEY get to know you. You DO... (read in full...)
Do I let people set me up for dates?
Q. So its been quite sometime since I left DC.And I really wish I came back with some better news, but hey life is life and it doesnt always go your way. So on with it. Its been over 6 months since I said to myself that I wanted to start dating aga...
A. 27 May 2019: And Sam, if it makes you feel uncomfortable, tell them to STOP.
At 24 you are HARDLY so old or on the shelf :)
As for blind dates in general... I have been on 2, back in my 20's - BOTH disasters lol. I don't know WHAT the people who set m... (read in full...)
Are there any laws on verbal abuse?
Q. Hello there, What is your view on verbal abuse? I was having a drink with a kinda newish 'friend' (a friend of my estranged brothers - who are both violent narcissists but no-one knows my past with them) and he suddenly turned the subject into...
A. 27 May 2019: STOP hanging round him OP?!
He obviously can not handle people of a different opinion or he just REALLY likes to ARGUE and "win".
Either way he sounds like a total dick and not someone I'd spend time around.
Would I sue him for being a dick... (read in full...)
I can't sleep next to my boyfriend because of his snoring!
Q. Hi! I am with my boyfriend now 5 months and everything else is great in our relationship except we can't sleep together!! I stay with him a few nights during the week and i just can't possibly sleep next to him! It's impossible for me,i am a very ...
A. 27 May 2019: Your BF should see a doctor.
Snoring isn't a sign of being healthy. (generally).
But in the main time, not sleep over? I know it's not the kind of fix you prefer, but you BOTH need to sleep and if you can't ADJUST to his movements and sn... (read in full...)
Am I wasting my time, should I break up with him?
Q. Okay, so im 26 yr old female. No kids. Living on my own. I am disabled so i get about 700$ a month to pay all my bills rent and food. It is very hard to live on that amount per month bc the rent and utility bills alone are that each month. Anyways, ...
A. 26 May 2019: Yes, I think you already know what you should do.
Having a partner means THEY ADD to your life in a positive manner. HE doesn't.
He thinks because his mom/grandmother takes care of him, so should you. And no, you shouldn't.
You shouldn't h... (read in full...)
Toxic mother relationship during pregnancy
Q. Ever since I was a child I have been blamed for everything that as gone wrong in my mothers life. Labelled a difficult child, spoilt, etc. Blamed for the break down of her marriage, (even though domestic violence and my fathers infidelity was a ...
A. 25 May 2019: I think you KNOW that dropping your mom IS the best for you AND your baby (and marriage). Whether this is long term or not, that is up to you.
KNOW that you CAN NOT change who she is or HOW she behaves, the only thing you CAN control is how you ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend does not reply to me anymore
Q. At the beginning of the relationship, we would always talk to each other message each other constantly. Until he stopped talking to me a lot. He asked me awhile back to always reply to him when I came online- so I did. Eventually he started ...
A. 25 May 2019: Wish him well, OP and then END it.
He is taking you for granted and he likes the IDEA of having a GF, he just doesn't want to HAVE to put in some effort and INVEST in spending time with you.
SO, WHY keep dating him? He really doesn't care.
... (read in full...)
He wants us to go back to "friends" after being so keen to start with.
Q. I’ve been seeing this guy for a couple of months, initially he was so keen and was talking about our future, plans, and meeting friends/family, but this has completely changed recently! He knew from the start that my father had cancer, which he...
A. 25 May 2019: I think he is just giving you space to deal with your Dad and his illness.
He might feel that (for you) this isn't the BEST time to get into a relationship and he doesn't want to take advantage since you are in a sort of vulnerable time in your ... (read in full...)
Do I let people set me up for dates?
Q. So its been quite sometime since I left DC.And I really wish I came back with some better news, but hey life is life and it doesnt always go your way. So on with it. Its been over 6 months since I said to myself that I wanted to start dating aga...
A. 25 May 2019: Someone trying to set you up CAN means she is interested as well, but that isn't always a given.
Do you talk to her in passing? Say hi, how are you? If not, I would start there BEFORE agreeing to be set up with her. Best way to gauge if she coul... (read in full...)
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